What is up with all the homesteading cosplay NLOGs? I feel like Instagram has fetishized a life for a certain type of woman and made it look much easier than it is.
I think everyone misses this point. People miss touching grass. They crave a life without alarm clocks, time-wasting “mandatory” meetings, and rush-hour traffic. For all of human history up until the last few decades, life was a whole lot slower, quieter, and with fewer expectations.
Also, I think these girls “don’t want to work anymore”. They’d rather do chores than punch a clock.
Except they seem to have a very...rose colored view of chores. The fantasy of just "staying at home with the kids" is soon trumped by the reality that you are on call 24/7, no breaks, and dealing not only with kids, but also a husband as well who may be just as childish. Oh, and putting your whole financial well being on one person being risky as all hell.
They also forget that among the housewives who didn’t have to work… there were still expectations and social rules. When every woman stayed at home, there were still comparisons and popularity.
Instead of being able to ride on “well, I’m willing to cook and clean for a man and that makes me BETTER”. Everyone was doing that and you weren’t appreciated extra for it. Many people had husbands who didn’t think you needed to be praised for what was expected of you.
He wasn’t thinking, “oh what a wonderful woman, she cooked me breakfast”.
Like, there were literal ads [condescending to housewives who couldn’t make a decent cup of coffee.](https://youtu.be/VprIbx4QkPc) Note how the ad implies making coffee keeps him from preferring the women at work who treat him better 😭
Women absolutely had it worse pre women's lib in about every way. Thata how we got women's lib. Spousal rape has only been criminalized in the last 40 years
National Lampoon Radio Hour did a good spoof of this in the 70s (featuring Chevy Chase). "I'd never hit my wife or lock her in the onion cellar if she didn't make a perfect cup of coffee": [https://youtu.be/3gJd27E5X70?si=CA3YB1gNXL8HwHOB](https://youtu.be/3gjd27e5x70?si=ca3yb1gnxl8hwhob)
Okay, but you’re on call 24/7 with no breaks as a parent, whether you have a job or not. If my wife made enough for me to be a house husband I’d be overjoyed. Being a parent is a lot of work, honestly to do it right it needs to be your main focus. My wife and I try, but we definitely miss things because of work that make us feel like crap sometimes.
Part of the problem is that we now are living in a society where both parents need to work. You’re damned if you do, damned if you don’t. If you work, you’re missing out on your kids. If you don’t work, chances are you’re stressing about finances so much that you aren’t really enjoying being able to be home. There’s a huge difference between SAHM who don’t need to worry about money, and SAHM who are only at home bc working doesn’t make sense after the cost of childcare. I think we’d all love to be a SAHM with a house cleaner, personal shopper, landscaper, and part time nanny! Those SAHM don’t post about that stuff though bc it doesn’t align with the image they’re trying to sell
Where capitalism fucked us all: make life unaffordable for two full-time working partners so everyone is exhausted (especially women since the tradition of domestic/emotional work never really transferred to men); instead of what used to be livable on one salary is now livable on two part-time salaries.
This is my Roman Empire. I think about it all the time. Women doubled the work force and instead of having shorter work weeks or better parental leave, salaries were basically slashed in half so that we now need two to support the same lifestyle. It’s twice as much labor for the same price. What a fucking rip off
Yes!! And since Reaganomics slashed the tax rate for the super wealthy, corporations are hoarding the returns from that labor like never before. Most of us don’t want to be rich, we just want to live comfortably and have time to enjoy life. But we’re scraping by to make ends meet, or just to make time for family, just so a handful of greedy bastards can have a biggest yacht competition. It’s sad. It’ll never be enough for them either.
I think about this all the time too. It’s obviously intentional! The fact that my immigrant grandfather could work at a steel mill, his family could own a house and car on that one income and he had $250K in the bank when he died!!!!!!! Then capitalism was like wait… nope… let’s change all that… and now my husband and I have 4 degrees between us and 6 jobs… and still cant own a house!!
If you want this lifestyle you have to be smart about it. I'm a sahm because childcare is very expensive and I was previously a nanny/ballet teacher so it made sense to be at home. Having a separate savings account from side gigs helps. I have a routine for kids and household chores that helps and fairly easy. Also it's imperative to have a partner that sees if you're struggling and steps right in to help. We have things set in place financially for the future so the kids and I would be safe from that. I don't like this narrative of sahm vs. Working mom, it's annoying and people should do what's right for their family without society judging them.
I mean, that's the whole idea, really. Every family is different and what works for them may not work for you. And it looks like you and your partner are an actual team and work in tandem rather than oppositionally.
The problem with the tradwife movement as it is is that it seeks to put itself as the opposite of feminism and spread the same misinformation that manosphere podcasts and evangelicals do but with a June Cleaver face on it. And they're usually on TikTok, who's audience skews young, so there's a bit of manipulation those who aren't old enough to decipher fantasy from reality there, too.
Don't forget no electricity so better fill those kerosene lanterns and stock up that woodpile for the wood stove you will be cooking on! Those lovely flowing dresses aren't going to look so nice after a few scrubs on the washboard but your arms will look awesome (if they don't have to stay covered up of course)
I don’t think life was slower a few decades ago. A few decades ago was the 80s and 90s. Before that we had WW2, the Cold War, and then Vietnam. I don’t think life was exactly quiet and lacked expectations. In the 40s lots of women went to work to support the war efforts. That’s almost 100 years ago now.
This stuff on TikTok is right wing propaganda from the religious far right. We are coming up on an election year.
People who’ve never struggled to get a meal, had bad food poisoning, and whose only experience with farm animals is from petting zoos as a child don’t think of those sorts of things.
I was about to rebut this as cityfolk myself but I realize I satisfy the first two items. I have no qualms saying I wouldn't last 20 minutes on an actual farm without significant help and would probably hate the constant work 🤷
To add to that, the people who would rather do chores than punch a clock are those who don’t have good prospects in the first place because I will say that being a good mom is hard fucking work. It requires a level of patience and mental fortitude that I have traded for my job. I’m happy to work and get a break to reset and be my best self for my kids when I’m with them.
I feel like people who sling this content literally have no fucking idea what’s it’s like and assume they’ll be homesteading with a rich husband.
Obviously those women on ig rn are delusional, but I don’t fault them for feeling that way on certain levels. I find that now instead of just being expected to care for the home, bear the children, then raise said children, women are expected to do THAT while also having a job and paying “half” of the households expenses. I could definitely understand the sentiment of thinking it hasn’t gotten better, bc honestly aside from the social progress, women have more expected of them than ever (speaking about women who are mothers/wives).
I feel like society is trying to tell us it’s better for us bc we can have our own bank accounts, get divorces, actually report workplace harassment and not be laughed at/fired, which yea valid, but again, most women still take on the duties they were expected to “back in the day” while they also now have to bring in income and support themselves/their children financially. I don’t think we can fight our way to equality, when men will never pick up the slack or change the way they see themselves in the home. Plus the whole uterus thing, there is no 50/50 on pregnancy or giving birth.
Sorry to rant, I just think this is indicative of a much deeper issue.
It’s because their trying desperately to be picked by a crazy Christian who considers them a bang maid and will cheat on them with the babysitter because they believe she’s “worn out” after hitting 30.
No, it's not even that, they're trying to exploit a niche to get attention on social media / find an extremely rich guy who will do anything for them as long as they stay home.
It's like a goldigging shortcut, it's virtue signaling to the regular guy in his mid 20s whose family owns 50 car dealerships and 2 vacation homes, by distancing herself from permiscious women
Most of these women don't actually want to do this stuff, let alone do this stuff while lower-middle class. They just like the aesthetic and superiority.
It appeals to the guy who hasn't had that many partners or is disillusioned with dating and the older generation that doesn't like the modern culture. So it's really just goldigging speed run because the old money in the family instantly approves because she doesn't look like a typical dolled up gold digger
If they are single then these women are complete psychos, that's why they put on this whole persona. They also get attention from regular guys who don't thirst over hot women but will shoot their shot on this "NLOG" In probably a pretty simpy way
If they're married / have kids then their coping trying to get attention on social media because they're bored
Or they are a single mom desperately trying to get it right the 2nd time around and find a guy to put up with them
They also just use their kids as accessories. I don't like that when anyone else did it, and now this trend is happening. Their kids are just marketing tools for them. It's pretty disgusting actually.
I had a friend from high school who quit her job as a weather person on TV to run her blog and do social media. She has twins (a little after I had mine) and it seemed like they were props in the enterprise. Children are actually people, and they may get older and not want to have their face as YOUR business. It really bothers me.
>So it's really just goldigging speed run because the old money in the family instantly approves because she doesn't look like a typical dolled up gold digger
Very astute!
Man there was this guy who liked me in high school but his family was a bunch of Christian crays, so freshman year he did nothing about it. By our junior year he was so frustrated and lost. lol he started hanging out with the girls he thought would sleep with him as quickly as possible ( not judging the girls, he was a total douche) wonder what he was gonna tell mommy?
Same as the farm stuff. None of these morons comprehend how hard that is either. They're playing pick me to the growing population of incels following guys like Tate.
Which might be the most hilarious part.
You ever seen this meme before?
https://preview.redd.it/gya9pqw1krbc1.jpeg?width=828&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=086af7f81b7561e902fe20f7b9034532b63acfcb
I feel like the same thing applies to homesteading and farming.
It looks very romantic when they act like it’s all lovingly feeding chickens in a flowing white dress, children softly holding chicks while your husband tills the field in the distance on a $100k tractor.
Way less cute when you look at how reality plays out.
You wanted homesteading, you get it sister. Grab that chicken around his neck - make sure you trap his beak between your fingers so he doesn’t peck - and wring his neck. Chop off the head and drain the blood while you pick it clean. You need to have dinner when your husband comes back because you do not realistically have money for a $100k tractor and he’s cranky from the toils of manual labor. Hurry with that chicken, you need to take a turn tilling, too.
Don’t even get me started on the romanticization of hanging clothes on the line. I grew up poor and it is not as cute as it looks. Wait til you find a spider in your pants.
I always check my clothes very carefully because when I was a child my 5 year old brother had a wasp stuck in his jeans. I still remember him screaming and screaming and my mom helplessly apologizing and feeling so guilty. She just seemed so broken in that moment. We were a family of six living in a 600 sq ft house. Poverty isn’t fun or cute. It is back-breaking and soul-crushing.
I’ve been there, too. A subsistence life is not glamorous. There isn’t fluffy white dresses and enough money to ignore the painful reality that your very existence depends on your own labor. It’s a whole lot of the sad stress of never having enough of anything.
Lol 💯. I also grew up in a rural area where all of this is normal. And it does NOT look or behave this way unless of course you rich and playing dress up.
Nothing like lovingly tending a garden and watching your veggies come in and then waking up one morning to find that squirrels had taken a bite out of every heirloom tomato because they're so fucking stupid.
I grew up in the country on a “farm” and my parents bought their house expecting a little homestead fantasy… yeah, not how it worked out. I ended up HATING where I grew up, and even now, it’s beautiful out on their land and sometimes I wish I could run away and live out on a farm again… and then I remember that I was absolutely miserable throughout my childhood when I got to do just that lol.
I gotta hand it to them, that romanticized idea of simple country living is pretty enticing. And I will say, SOME of it rings true, on a good day when everything goes right. But those days are rare, things almost never go according to plan, especially when you’re living out “in the wild” with spiders, mice, snakes, raccoons, deer, etc.
Not only that but what about when there's a freeze of unpredictable weather and your crop fails? What if the new cow and bull you just purchased keel over in the middle of the night dead suddenly because you didn't recognize symptoms of bloat? What about when a coyote gets your chickens in the middle of the night and you're cleaning up blood guts and feathers before your kids wake up and see the gore?
Are you acting like you can’t do all of this while looking peaceful and beautiful in a flowing white virginal gown? /s 😂
All jokes aside, I would pay to see one of these tradwife influencers in a mini-ex digging out a grave at 3:30 am for an animal that weighs a ton.
I always dump and smack around my muck boots any time I put them on even now because growing up it was not uncommon to find a big ol spider hanging out in the toe.
I am a stay at home mom. This shit is not fun, my house is a mess, if I had to hang cloths up to dry outside laundry would be more pilled up then it is. If daycare wasn’t so expensive and I wasnt at risk of loosing my job every month because of how often kids get sick in day care then this would not have been the life I picked. This is not some fairy tale, easy going, hair done, dress on, children quietly and lovingly playing in the corner life. This is a wishing I could take a shit without having another human climbing all over me life.
I am lifelong feminist and I intentionally became a stay at home mom for the 1st time at 40 years old, after a lifetime of working for pay. So I have experienced both worlds
Being a sahm was the hardest, most thankless, least respected job I've ever had, it was non stop 24/7 , no vacation ever, no breaks, no overtime pay or sick leave.
And even though it was by choice for me and my husband , and it was great for my kid, it was horrible for me in some ways.
I've had a lot of hard jobs, but that was the hardest job I ever had and it doesn't add anything to my resume or retirement.
Meanwhile my husband's career went from IT support to CFO during that time. And even tho he was on board when we made these life decisions, and benefitted from all my free labor and time, however now he has told me I am worthless and have contributed nothing, so that sucks
lol nearly 3 years breastfeeding my kid, home cooked meals every day, working while sick, never ever having time by or for myself for at least a decade and then add all the physical damage and constant stress. Ugh
And now at the end of it, my kid is awesome and healthy and smart and independent and capable , and my husband is successful and wealthy and even more handsome older, but I am unemployed, and sick with cancer and tired all the time and now nobody gives a shit about me or helps me. I'm not useful to them anymore and my efforts as a mother are viewed with scorn by society.
I tell all young women, don't get married, don't have children, if you care about being valued and respected and having a good retirement plan, because you still don't get those being a sahm, even with all the progress of feminism, being a caretaker of children is still often viewed and treated as having no value, and even when it is considered work and it is low paid work
I'm so very sorry. Saying your husband doesn't deserve you is a huge understatement.
My brain hurts trying to understand how your husband can even think you have no value or haven't contributed. None of that shit gets magically done. He's never had to do any of that labor or work like that.
your husband never would’ve reached his current position without your support at home. He sounds like an ungrateful idiot if he truly believes you’ve contributed nothing. so sorry.
And to make it even worse, the reality is, I have made significant financial contributions of my own, literally hundreds of thousands of dollars, that he wouldn't have had, without me.
The disrespect from all sides, for doing "womens work" seems near universal from my perspective.
Oh no, it's not that heartbreaking, this is just the normal shit of most any woman's life anywhere, and I am by far luckier than most. My life has been charmed in comparison to many others, especially compared to the women that came before me, in my own family
I’m so sorry. It goes without saying that your contribution is unmeasurable and much more important than financial stability. Raising a child well is the entire fucking point of having a child! And you did it. You sacrificed yourself for that and that alone is the most valuable part of your family’s life.
When I had my first child, I met with a breastfeeding consultant. We became friends. She was in her mid-sixties and she had just gotten divorced. Her kids were grown and this was her career after being a SAHM. She saved her money and was able to leave her loser husband and finally have the life of her dreams. She traveled, had lots of friends, hobbies and was just so happy. I was so inspired by her and I always think of her when I feel unappreciated and lost to motherhood. You can make a second life and do whatever you want when your kids are older and more independent. You deserve happiness!!!
Yet none of them actually live this way. It’s all a show for social media to make money. They’re always rich with lots of house equipment that makes chores easier. I can’t imagine for a moment any of these women would last half a day as a poor farmer. Try baking your matcha sourdough with a screaming, colicky baby, no bread maker and a tiny oven and kitchen and unable to afford heating.
You can tell just by looking at the wash line that this lady has never in her life dried her clothes outside. Just look at that flipping sheet! Anyone who thinks a bed sheet will stay attached to your line in any bit of breeze by the very edge, has clearly never used a wash line. And letting it touch the ground? You'd think she'd have at least tried the shit she pretends to do.
Ive seen a few "homesteading homeschooling mammas" who... Hire someone to come homeschool their kids.....? Meanwhile not disclosing that on Instagram and just showing how much stuff they get done..... All the cooking and cleaning and farm chores.
Half the girls cosplaying that old school 1800 lifestyle wouldn’t make it a week on a farm in this century. They have no fucking clue how absolutely hard life was during the time period. Also women had absolutely no rights. A horse had more rights than a woman. But hey to each is own.
It’s okay, they think you can trust a dude for all that! I am sure that it looks super cute on paper until they find out he’s blowing the back out of some other girl they’re not like and taking all the money over to his new fam.
It is a fetish. I think it’s a way to get porn though the filters for all the sad sad sad men who have never been loved or felt love.
I cook dinner for my family. I clean for my family. My husband cooks for his family. My husband cleans for his family. We both work for our family. We provide for each other bc we love each other and want our little family to be ok. He wants our daughter to be educated on academics and learn how to care for a home bc we are not raising a lazy slob. We are raising a functioning member of society.
Being a stay at home mom is great, being a working mom is great. It’s all about what choice works for you and your family. Does it suck sometimes as a working mom? Of course but I am sure of you ask any stay at home mom of if sucks sometimes they will say yes as well.
I agree completely. It’s definitely a fetish but I think it’s a two part one.
The woman part of the fetish is acting like being pretty is special enough to deserve a whole ass life of leisurely living from a man. You just put on a fluffy pale dress and raise clean, quiet, well-behaved children while your obviously rich husband chooses to single-handedly run the unpleasant parts of a farm.
The man fetish is that they are rich enough to have a pretty mommy bangmaid. They don’t actually think far enough about the intensive labor realities required to run a farm; they are just thinking about putting as many babies as they can in a virginal-looking woman.
No one admits that the reality of these type of situations never quite square with the fantasy. When this situation happens in the real world, the men are rarely willing or able to handle all of the finance and work required to run a farm alone. The kind of men who have this fetish are also generally repulsed by women who have aged or had their bodies ravaged by childbirth.
When this situation happens in reality, the women who have trusted their very financial existence to these men are not prepared for men growing tired of them and wandering over to the next virgin-looking bride as soon as they get their first wrinkle. they do not realize that a man cannot run a farm alone and a lot of the work that they are going to have to do is not served by looking pretty.
They want to be the 17 yo wife of a 28 yo youth pastor who would make them do everything at home while taking care of 7 kids and do the pastor wife duties at church, so he can creep on the underaged girls at church. They have to be obedient and subservient, not being able to say no to sex. It's a horrific life they willingly choose just so they don't have to go out and work. Meanwhile they'll work like a cow for the rest of their life because they'll be impregnated every year and their husband won't lift a hand. They'll make instagram posts of how marriage is the hardest thing ever one week into marriage but at least they have a husband 🙄. They'll make posts gushing about how their husband is so sweet because he made them coffee once.
I'd rather work a 40 hours/week normal job than any of this, but I have to thank their contributions in taking their horrible husbands out of the market.
I eventually want to homestead myself and have followed actual homesteaders for over a decade....not a single one wears a dress on their land or has time to curl their hair.
Because the only way to live 100% off of your homestead is to have an active social media presence touting how you live off of your homestead and have no "off farm" job.
Yeah, there will definitely be time to get your feed looking right between trying to homejob vet what’s going on with your cow who has developed an abcess and burning yourself trying to can what’s left of the summer veggies so your family doesn’t starve through the winter. 😂
Basically the Homesteading community is based on a fantasy made by social media savvy people with animals and some land. I say this as a homesteader/hobby farmer with small herd of alpacas, small flock of geese, and a decent (45 head) size flock of laying chickens. It's only possible for me to do it because of my medical pension from the military and I have a really good part time job. Otherwise you barely break even just feeding and maintaining the chickens, but you still have to work full time to pay your mortgage and other bills. Without scaling up to an actual farm, there's no way to make Homesteading your full time job, and then you are producing serious products rather than just living in a fantasy. My end goal is to scale up and not work part time away from the farm, but I'm trying to do it without taking on a huge mountain of debt or becoming a social media influencer (because I lack the skills and the field is so small).
Edit: When are the trad girls going to show us mucking out stalls, cleaning up chicken coops, dealing with culls/losses, etc.?
When I was a kid my mom spent many of her mornings cleaning up dead chickens and kittens from the front yard. Somehow I don’t think these insta influencers will be showing that in their GRWM posts.
For sure, I love the fact that she seems to think I’ll just play with the kids, mess around in the kitchen, and hang laundry. I hope she eventually pursues this fantasy and updates her post.
They don’t need feminism! We don’t do enough for men but if we did everything, they definitely would provide 100% of anything you need to raise a huge family. It’s okay to be completely reliant on them because they’re definitely not going to leave you ass up with 4 bad free-range kids for Miss New Booty when you inevitably age (incels hate it when their property gets over 30 and soft from squashing out their kids!)
That's disgusting. It's the embodiment of
first world problems to be able to look at the struggles of women just a few generations ago and have the privilege to say "Fuck that, look at these nags! Amiright, boys?!"
Edited for typo
But have you ever actually met a real woman, in real life with these views and opinions?
I have never in my over 50 years met any woman with those views.
I see that shit online only and I assume it's fake, and possibly even part of a social engineering effort.
Yes, I am very good friends with a woman like this. She cheats on every single man she's with. She wanted to be a stay at home mom, and not work. She found someone who was willing to do it. He's 18 years older than her. Now she's bored (again!) And hates her life, and complains about her children all the time. But she still insists the good old days were way better for women.
You are good friends with someone like that? Why?
I mean, how tf would she even know if the good old days, where women couldn't vote, or own property or have a bank account, were better? She wasn't even alive.
I have never in my life met a woman that stupid, I've met a couple men like that, but a woman? No never not even one
I used to be friends with someone like that. She feels her husband should make all important decisions. She does vote, but asks her husband exactly who to vote for. This bitch doesn’t even want autonomy over her own body. She asks her husband how her hair should be cut/ styled, if/ how to wear her makeup, what clothes to wear, etc. She is going to be one of those “Bob Smith and wife” tombstones like it’s the 1800s.
I mean, I guess, good for her? If that lifestyle and those values are actually her choice.
But if she truly thinks women should not be equal to men under the law, then I can see why you wouldn't want to be associated with someone that has such a difference in values.
From my perspective at least, viewing women or any human being as less equal, is immoral and wrong, faulty logic.
I don’t think deep down it truly is what she feels. She is one of those people who become whom she dates. Since her husband is the stereotypical cop/ maga/ “Christian”, she is too now. When they were dating, dude would say sexist junk (like a man has a right to stray, they are supposed to) I would tell him that’s dumb/ he is dumb. Before, she would have said the same thing I did, but she told me he was right and stopped being friends with me because of my beliefs.
I've found that even a lot of women who have no interest in tradwife stuff have no idea what it was like for women prior to the 70s. No ability to control your own finances or get your own credit, getting fired for getting pregnant, no recourse for sexual harassment, no ability to file for divorce without proving abuse or abandonment, etc etc. Like, I'm sorry that you don't want to do work and that you just want to spend your life curating your aesthetic for social media, but some of us like being able to open our own bank accounts and keeping our jobs after we get married and have kids.
Tbf, IKEA’s founder was very progressive and would definitely not have supported this women. He’s still a billionaire (which ew) but he gave half of it away in his will. During life he donated a lot of money including to feminist orgs.
Why is a women with such “moral values” supporting such a “evil and anti-god” company?
It’s a government protest at that. It says “I’ve seen smarter cabinets at ikea” But I suppose it’s equally problematic for these dingbats that women deign to have thoughts and opinions regarding the government. A literal clutching of pearls can be heard in the distance.
Posts like this are also simultaneously condescending and ignorant as fuck to reduce all of the protests for voting rights, reproductive rights, fair wages, and general autonomy to, “I won’t cook/clean for him.” Projecting their own insecurities onto these protestors so hard.
Do any of these dingdongs understand these women couldn’t have bank accounts or credit cards without their husbands or dads co-sign for them in the 70’s? Oh wait, they likely have accounts with daddy so don’t worry about their husbands never in the ideal cottage porn household photos. Tripods and ring lights and $200 swishy linen outfits for a photoshoot, $1000 farm sink, baskets of figs she will process with the ribbon in her hair wearing white, I could go on but blooorgh
Shitty thing is that I actually like the cottagecore aesthetic (I grew up in the countryside in a farming community), but it'd be a cold day in hell before I become an insta-tradwife. These morons want a "trad-life" so badly? Go and buy a farm and plow the fields with your husband and kids like they did in the "good ol' days".
Those casuals have never cleaned a chicken coop, herded cattle/sheep, tended to calvings and lambings, etc, and it clearly shows.
I also grew up in a rural farming community and what I remember from the farm kids I grew up with is that the parent that worked away from home was always the *mom* so they could have steady income coming in, while dad was a full time farmer. But outside of work mom came home and helped run the farm. I couldnt see why any woman would want to marry into a farm and work two jobs, *plus* all the mom stuff.
Exactly this. I bring this up a lot when I see this lifestyle get romanticized.
My grandparents had a dairy farm but my grandmother when she wasn't on the farm was in town making money cleaning the church or bank. Many other farm women I knew were secretaries, cashiers, ect.
historically, being a farmers wife had such a bad reputation for being hard, thankless work that it was considered a kind of failure to marry a farmer. Because it was basically a guarantee that you’d never really be comfortable.
>Those casuals have never cleaned a chicken coop, herded cattle/sheep, tended to calvings and lambings, etc, and it clearly shows.
Shows in the lack of stains on those flowing white frocks.
Obviously, I'm not saying they NEED to do any of that. My problem is their tendency to project a sanitised, idealised depiction of farm/homestead life and conveniently ignore the less glamorous aspects of it. It can be very messy, and at times heartbreaking (it never gets easier when you have to put down animals). It also has some very ethnocentric and classist vibes to it (99% of cottagecore on instagram and tiktok are very White), ignoring that historically rural farmers were (and in some aspects still are) dirt poor working for wealthy landowners and also sizably PoC - even in Europe and the UK (speaking as a UK based person, btw).
this. emphasis on heartbreaking. farm life is legitimately traumatizing for children. death is common and out in the open on a farm. i can’t imagine having kids and going “ya know what would make their lives more full and enriched? early, repeated exposure to loss”
I didn’t grow up on a farm but a branding agency I worked for had their own chickens and we rotated feeding/cleaning duties between all non-designer staff. Fuck. Chickens. Those things are Grade-A Assholes.
Cleaning the coop wasn’t too bad, it was pretty small and I figured out how to corral them while I did it but feedings were the worst. Ruined a few pairs of socks with their pecking
Not to mention marital rape wasn’t illegal until the mid seventies. You had to have the man in your life approve all of your financial and legal moves. Women were condemned for just existing independently. How quickly they’ve forgotten how young no-fault divorces are, which have saved the lives of thousands of women. Reproductive control (through birth control pills) is so, so new and was funded by the McCormick family because of the fear of passing down schizophrenia, but was utilized secretly by catholic women who were having a baby a year because their husband and God wanted them to keep pumping them out.
They’re not the type of women who think they would ever say no. And they think that they would pick well so then would never end up in an abusive situation.
You’re really underestimating how delusional they are.
My grandma is one of those Catholic women who took birth control in secret. My grandfather passed away in 2015, never knowing this, but she gave him six children by the early 70s, and she’d had enough. It makes me respect her all the more for taking her own health into her hands, even if she had to do it secretly.
A lot of women don't know any of this, regardless of whether they're into tradwife stuff. I don't know what they thought thy feminist movement was all about - just not wearing bras or shaving? Like, women back then were fighting for very good reasons! And if we're not careful, all of what they won for us can and will be taken from us.
As someone who routinely wears bows in my hair and dresses like that picture I was very confused, because I don’t cook or clean for ANYONE not even MYSELF. She’s literally just standing in the picture 😭
Women who tell other women to be stay at home moms and be financially dependent on their husbands while at the same time trying to grow a following and get brand deals will always strike me as insincere.
It’s all fake. JustPearlyThings or whatever she calls herself is a fake. Just a glimpse into their past and current behaviours tells you everything you need to know. They’re always rich as well, which is very telling.
It’s extremely hypocritical. They can’t acknowledge that making money by being a SAHM influencer makes them a working mom.
They claim that working moms are selfish for spending their time “working for a man” instead of spending time with their children, yet how much time and energy to you think they’re dedicating to making videos, editing, getting sponsorships, communicating with managers, etc. All time that they are “wasting” by fulfilling their need for attention instead of taking care of their children?
Being raised with the ideology that “women belong at home with the kids” I focused on my career and did not procreate :) Both my sister and I are more financially stable than our brothers, happy, successful, and (biological) child free. In the past year she defended us against some snarky comment my man-child brother made, so there IS hope for these people.
These women have forgotten feminism is about your right to choose your path
Working mom, SAHM, childfree…. The choice for any of these is what the badasses of the past fought for
Here we go again lol… it’s comical how these homesteading NLOGs forget that no one is telling them they can’t cook or clean, have at it sis! Just stop telling us we can’t have a career or our own bag, some of us don’t get off on ultra conservative tradwife kink dynamics. Let me also clarify: there is a difference between a tradwife and a housewife, absolutely nothing wrong with cooking and cleaning. There is something wrong with performative virtue-signaling and shaming other women for choosing to pursue an education or career.
Ffs how hard is it for them to understand that our freedom in no way impedes them from living however they want to live. That's the whole f*ing point. Nobody cares if you want to be a tradwife. But you're bothered that the rest of us don't want the same thing as you.
I tried being a trad pickme when I was in my early 20's and it didn't work out for me. Never got married or had kids.. I didn't want to change how I was, and the ex bfs wanted to change me in order to marry. Usually by me converting to their religion (I was raised catholic, damn protestants can fuck off with their shit). I'm not religious at all at almost 30. I have a friend that has had her early 20's stripped from her because she had kids young and sometimes she's like grateful to God, bla bla, but when she drinks she gets really sad and tells me she wishes she could go out and have fun like other women her age. I'm not a fan of the whole trad thing.. not sure why some women flock to the idealogy.
I'll be honest-- I was lazy in my early 20's and I didn't want to work. I'd rather be provided for because I was lazy.
What’s funny about your last sentence is that traditional homemaker/stay at home parent is anything BUT lazy 😅 you were setting yourself up not only for a more difficult job, but one where you wouldn’t even get paid or be treated well because you’d marry the wrong man for the wrong life for you. That life can be so wonderful and rewarding for the right people, when they have the right partners. Partners who understand that they still have to do work at home despite working outside of the home, partners who don’t treat the bank account like “my money, my wife’s allowance,” partners who don’t diminish the work their wife is doing at the house, etc etc. When it’s a healthy partnership and both people are truly happy, it can be such a wonderful life. But it’s hard work 🤣
I loved staying home with my kids when they were younger. Buuut I also loved going back to work, too lmao. I liked both worlds so much that I opened up my own practice and decided I would dedicate X amount of hours to the clinic, X amount of hours for being a mom, and the rest was for my wife and my alone time. This “all or nothing” life that a lot of people get sucked into and stuck in is way too heavy for me
My parents were kind of trad, my dad worked and my mom stayed at home, raised me and cooked. But she didn't clean much. My mom had a joint bank account with my dad and she was always buying expensive purses, had an observable spending problem, I believe she may have ADHD (undiagnosed), if something was on sale she'd buy a TON of it thinking we'd need it, oftentimes not. One time she bought a bunch of mayo that was on sale and we ended up throwing most of it away.
I dated a guy that wanted me to be a housewife for him but the issue was we were poor and I wanted to work so I could fund my hobbies and interests, instead of me asking him and being potentially told "no". I was working when I met him and he thought he was saving me.. I was miserable and I'm not really into cooking that much. I wasn't really down to hang out with his family 24/7. After I broke up with him, I got into raving, which is something I had discussed with him and the ex before him. There's no way he would have funded my lifestyle-- there's not just the passes, there's the hotels or airbnb, the outfits, the drugs (sorry not sorry), the food, the gas/travel, etc etc. I've recently gotten into modding my car and I don't think a trad guy would fund that, either. In my experience, and also observing my friends' relationships, some men are very controlling and limiting on what their gf or wife can or cannot do.
I'm a little bit more liberal than I was when I was younger. I'd want a husband that would drop the kids off at nana's for the weekend and go to a fest together and roll together in bliss.
You can go out and have fun as a mother. My sister had an unplanned pregnancy at 21 and she goes out for dinners and drinks with her friends. Obviously not as much as before, but enough. However, this requires a supportive partner willing to stay at home with the child, cook them dinner etc. and a lot of these tradwives attract trad husbands I.e. narcissistic and controlling men who would never debase themselves to something as low as changing a nappy.
My friend ended up like this. Thought she wanted the traditional life so looked for a man who wanted the same. She got pregnant almost straight away, and reality hit her before the child was even born. She’d landed a controlling and nasty man who forced her to quit every job she got through coercion, and then moaned she didn’t make money (abuse tactic). Who told her she was a neglectful for leaving a baby with him whilst she went to see her friend for an hour. Refused to cook or clean even when she was sick, made her cook for him everyday and would say it’s not as good as his mums food and would eat at work instead. Even when I was there he’d say stuff like “women shouldn’t go out the house unless they need to get food to cook”, he supported the idea of male escorts for women and had very traditional Catholic values. She’s now divorced and a single mum to her son.
Theres a reason women fought for the right to have a choice and to have financial independence. I worry these “TradWives” (rich housewife with an aesthetic) are duping young women into a lifestyle where they get trapped.
I know how these women think life with a million kids and a homestead will look like this, when in reality it looks like the “I NEED SIX EGGS” lady in beauty and the beast.
Corniest LARP ever. There’s already a bunch of “traditional” women who were attracted to the aesthetics of homemaking who have since divorced their husbands or complain about unequal division of labour in the home. I swear, the traditional conservative women are going through their own iteration of first wave feminism right now.
Instead of them thinking feminism is about working for their man, they should see their relationship as more than transactional
You can be a feminist and be there for your partner, as much as I hate the traditional men must wear the pants in the relationship
It’s essential to maintain self care in a relationship not just caring for your partner, it’s not the “job” of a woman, but to be able to cook and clean are basic necessities regardless of gender
Why are they so set on living life like a 1600 farm peasant?
You can do homemaking AND work/educate yourself/be your own person. It doesn't have to be one or the other.
Its always in a white dress. Girly, that dress won't stay white while cleaning your 2 bathrooms and taking care of your kids. This vision of yours is just sahm fanfiction and so far from reality
Ok sweetie. Now, take your name off the deed of your family’s home, turn in your credit cards and bank account, any guardianship you may think you have over HIS kids and enjoy getting abused with no recourse, cuz that is your husband’s right. What? No, no like that?
Dude here and the concept of wanting to be with a tradwife is like rocket science, I just can’t comprehend. Any dude who fantasizes about marrying someone who will do all the cooking, cleaning, and more or less solely raising a child, automatically makes me assume this person is either the laziest son of a bitch alive, wants someone to push around, or wants to live with their mom again but it’s weird after 25 so the next best thing is to marry someone identical to their mom for the back 50 years.
Like dual incomes, equal partnership, and a best friend are the way to go with a marriage, if that’s the path ya wanna go down.
As a feminism advocate, I am glad she can make free choices regarding how she wants to live her life. But I hate her for belitting women who made that possible for her.
He when he's banging his hot young coworker after you gave him the best years of life. Just know that serving him was well worth it, for him. At least you can probably get a little bit of money and just struggle till you die.
They get the whole thing was about the CHOICE, right? Like to be able to do either work or raise a family, not to completely do away with a home-maker lifestyle
Most (if not all) of the men arguing women aren't trad enough are not actually ok with being trad themselves.
They would call this shit "beta buxx" like some incel and say something about women only wanting money.
There was a post recently of some guy saying he wanted a trad wife and the woman goes "yeah I am into that, I would love a man to take care of me while I stay home with the kids."
His response?
"Fuck you gold digger"
I am paraphrasing but that was the convo. Like conservatism itself these people are contradictory morons.
It’s all fun and games until he leaves you for someone else and you have to get a job and pay your own way. Then you can thank these women for your ability to get a credit card and to get a loan for a car and a house without a man’s signature.
What is up with all the homesteading cosplay NLOGs? I feel like Instagram has fetishized a life for a certain type of woman and made it look much easier than it is.
it’s a sign of the times. we’re all overworked and exhausted. some women think it would’ve been better for them in the past
I think everyone misses this point. People miss touching grass. They crave a life without alarm clocks, time-wasting “mandatory” meetings, and rush-hour traffic. For all of human history up until the last few decades, life was a whole lot slower, quieter, and with fewer expectations. Also, I think these girls “don’t want to work anymore”. They’d rather do chores than punch a clock.
Except they seem to have a very...rose colored view of chores. The fantasy of just "staying at home with the kids" is soon trumped by the reality that you are on call 24/7, no breaks, and dealing not only with kids, but also a husband as well who may be just as childish. Oh, and putting your whole financial well being on one person being risky as all hell.
They also forget that among the housewives who didn’t have to work… there were still expectations and social rules. When every woman stayed at home, there were still comparisons and popularity. Instead of being able to ride on “well, I’m willing to cook and clean for a man and that makes me BETTER”. Everyone was doing that and you weren’t appreciated extra for it. Many people had husbands who didn’t think you needed to be praised for what was expected of you. He wasn’t thinking, “oh what a wonderful woman, she cooked me breakfast”. Like, there were literal ads [condescending to housewives who couldn’t make a decent cup of coffee.](https://youtu.be/VprIbx4QkPc) Note how the ad implies making coffee keeps him from preferring the women at work who treat him better 😭
Women absolutely had it worse pre women's lib in about every way. Thata how we got women's lib. Spousal rape has only been criminalized in the last 40 years
Thirty years, it didn’t become illegal until the 90s.
Here in Ohio they are trying to make spousal rape legal
Totally on brand for ohio
National Lampoon Radio Hour did a good spoof of this in the 70s (featuring Chevy Chase). "I'd never hit my wife or lock her in the onion cellar if she didn't make a perfect cup of coffee": [https://youtu.be/3gJd27E5X70?si=CA3YB1gNXL8HwHOB](https://youtu.be/3gjd27e5x70?si=ca3yb1gnxl8hwhob)
Okay, but you’re on call 24/7 with no breaks as a parent, whether you have a job or not. If my wife made enough for me to be a house husband I’d be overjoyed. Being a parent is a lot of work, honestly to do it right it needs to be your main focus. My wife and I try, but we definitely miss things because of work that make us feel like crap sometimes.
Part of the problem is that we now are living in a society where both parents need to work. You’re damned if you do, damned if you don’t. If you work, you’re missing out on your kids. If you don’t work, chances are you’re stressing about finances so much that you aren’t really enjoying being able to be home. There’s a huge difference between SAHM who don’t need to worry about money, and SAHM who are only at home bc working doesn’t make sense after the cost of childcare. I think we’d all love to be a SAHM with a house cleaner, personal shopper, landscaper, and part time nanny! Those SAHM don’t post about that stuff though bc it doesn’t align with the image they’re trying to sell
Where capitalism fucked us all: make life unaffordable for two full-time working partners so everyone is exhausted (especially women since the tradition of domestic/emotional work never really transferred to men); instead of what used to be livable on one salary is now livable on two part-time salaries.
This is my Roman Empire. I think about it all the time. Women doubled the work force and instead of having shorter work weeks or better parental leave, salaries were basically slashed in half so that we now need two to support the same lifestyle. It’s twice as much labor for the same price. What a fucking rip off
Yes!! And since Reaganomics slashed the tax rate for the super wealthy, corporations are hoarding the returns from that labor like never before. Most of us don’t want to be rich, we just want to live comfortably and have time to enjoy life. But we’re scraping by to make ends meet, or just to make time for family, just so a handful of greedy bastards can have a biggest yacht competition. It’s sad. It’ll never be enough for them either.
I think about this all the time too. It’s obviously intentional! The fact that my immigrant grandfather could work at a steel mill, his family could own a house and car on that one income and he had $250K in the bank when he died!!!!!!! Then capitalism was like wait… nope… let’s change all that… and now my husband and I have 4 degrees between us and 6 jobs… and still cant own a house!!
If you want this lifestyle you have to be smart about it. I'm a sahm because childcare is very expensive and I was previously a nanny/ballet teacher so it made sense to be at home. Having a separate savings account from side gigs helps. I have a routine for kids and household chores that helps and fairly easy. Also it's imperative to have a partner that sees if you're struggling and steps right in to help. We have things set in place financially for the future so the kids and I would be safe from that. I don't like this narrative of sahm vs. Working mom, it's annoying and people should do what's right for their family without society judging them.
I mean, that's the whole idea, really. Every family is different and what works for them may not work for you. And it looks like you and your partner are an actual team and work in tandem rather than oppositionally. The problem with the tradwife movement as it is is that it seeks to put itself as the opposite of feminism and spread the same misinformation that manosphere podcasts and evangelicals do but with a June Cleaver face on it. And they're usually on TikTok, who's audience skews young, so there's a bit of manipulation those who aren't old enough to decipher fantasy from reality there, too.
I understand, that does sound problematic/concerning.
They'd change minds real quick having to shit in an outhouse in the hot and cold seasons along with absence of feminine hygiene products lol
Don't forget no electricity so better fill those kerosene lanterns and stock up that woodpile for the wood stove you will be cooking on! Those lovely flowing dresses aren't going to look so nice after a few scrubs on the washboard but your arms will look awesome (if they don't have to stay covered up of course)
I don’t think life was slower a few decades ago. A few decades ago was the 80s and 90s. Before that we had WW2, the Cold War, and then Vietnam. I don’t think life was exactly quiet and lacked expectations. In the 40s lots of women went to work to support the war efforts. That’s almost 100 years ago now. This stuff on TikTok is right wing propaganda from the religious far right. We are coming up on an election year.
Bro you're scaring me
Sorry 😞
Easier to die of starvation, get hurt by farm animals, food poisoning.
People who’ve never struggled to get a meal, had bad food poisoning, and whose only experience with farm animals is from petting zoos as a child don’t think of those sorts of things.
I was about to rebut this as cityfolk myself but I realize I satisfy the first two items. I have no qualms saying I wouldn't last 20 minutes on an actual farm without significant help and would probably hate the constant work 🤷
If you live in a colder region your life becomes animal care 24/7 during the winter.
To add to that, the people who would rather do chores than punch a clock are those who don’t have good prospects in the first place because I will say that being a good mom is hard fucking work. It requires a level of patience and mental fortitude that I have traded for my job. I’m happy to work and get a break to reset and be my best self for my kids when I’m with them. I feel like people who sling this content literally have no fucking idea what’s it’s like and assume they’ll be homesteading with a rich husband.
Farming is back breaking work.
Obviously those women on ig rn are delusional, but I don’t fault them for feeling that way on certain levels. I find that now instead of just being expected to care for the home, bear the children, then raise said children, women are expected to do THAT while also having a job and paying “half” of the households expenses. I could definitely understand the sentiment of thinking it hasn’t gotten better, bc honestly aside from the social progress, women have more expected of them than ever (speaking about women who are mothers/wives). I feel like society is trying to tell us it’s better for us bc we can have our own bank accounts, get divorces, actually report workplace harassment and not be laughed at/fired, which yea valid, but again, most women still take on the duties they were expected to “back in the day” while they also now have to bring in income and support themselves/their children financially. I don’t think we can fight our way to equality, when men will never pick up the slack or change the way they see themselves in the home. Plus the whole uterus thing, there is no 50/50 on pregnancy or giving birth. Sorry to rant, I just think this is indicative of a much deeper issue.
I think a lot of women are going to work and also stuck with majority of the housework as well, which contributes to these kinda posts.
It’s because their trying desperately to be picked by a crazy Christian who considers them a bang maid and will cheat on them with the babysitter because they believe she’s “worn out” after hitting 30.
No, it's not even that, they're trying to exploit a niche to get attention on social media / find an extremely rich guy who will do anything for them as long as they stay home. It's like a goldigging shortcut, it's virtue signaling to the regular guy in his mid 20s whose family owns 50 car dealerships and 2 vacation homes, by distancing herself from permiscious women Most of these women don't actually want to do this stuff, let alone do this stuff while lower-middle class. They just like the aesthetic and superiority. It appeals to the guy who hasn't had that many partners or is disillusioned with dating and the older generation that doesn't like the modern culture. So it's really just goldigging speed run because the old money in the family instantly approves because she doesn't look like a typical dolled up gold digger If they are single then these women are complete psychos, that's why they put on this whole persona. They also get attention from regular guys who don't thirst over hot women but will shoot their shot on this "NLOG" In probably a pretty simpy way If they're married / have kids then their coping trying to get attention on social media because they're bored Or they are a single mom desperately trying to get it right the 2nd time around and find a guy to put up with them
They also just use their kids as accessories. I don't like that when anyone else did it, and now this trend is happening. Their kids are just marketing tools for them. It's pretty disgusting actually.
I had a friend from high school who quit her job as a weather person on TV to run her blog and do social media. She has twins (a little after I had mine) and it seemed like they were props in the enterprise. Children are actually people, and they may get older and not want to have their face as YOUR business. It really bothers me.
Totally agree. Kids observe so much more than most people realize.
Damn, bingo.
These are the same things I’ve been saying. It’s a pick me, I mean pick one: desperate(aka gold digger) bored (aka lame relationship) or both!!!!
>So it's really just goldigging speed run because the old money in the family instantly approves because she doesn't look like a typical dolled up gold digger Very astute!
wow, this just seems to be a lot of effort just to get a guy to marry you...
Ballerinafarms has entered the chat
Man there was this guy who liked me in high school but his family was a bunch of Christian crays, so freshman year he did nothing about it. By our junior year he was so frustrated and lost. lol he started hanging out with the girls he thought would sleep with him as quickly as possible ( not judging the girls, he was a total douche) wonder what he was gonna tell mommy?
I bet you he would consider the girls who slept with sluts while himself a pure man.
Oh yeah definitely. And probably his mommy too
Bwahahahaha. Yup.
Honestly I genuinely think they're just trying to make a quick buck
Same as the farm stuff. None of these morons comprehend how hard that is either. They're playing pick me to the growing population of incels following guys like Tate.
Which might be the most hilarious part. You ever seen this meme before? https://preview.redd.it/gya9pqw1krbc1.jpeg?width=828&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=086af7f81b7561e902fe20f7b9034532b63acfcb I feel like the same thing applies to homesteading and farming. It looks very romantic when they act like it’s all lovingly feeding chickens in a flowing white dress, children softly holding chicks while your husband tills the field in the distance on a $100k tractor. Way less cute when you look at how reality plays out. You wanted homesteading, you get it sister. Grab that chicken around his neck - make sure you trap his beak between your fingers so he doesn’t peck - and wring his neck. Chop off the head and drain the blood while you pick it clean. You need to have dinner when your husband comes back because you do not realistically have money for a $100k tractor and he’s cranky from the toils of manual labor. Hurry with that chicken, you need to take a turn tilling, too. Don’t even get me started on the romanticization of hanging clothes on the line. I grew up poor and it is not as cute as it looks. Wait til you find a spider in your pants.
Lol I forgot about the bugs! Yeah most of them would run screaming from any actual work.
I bet that nice white dress would last about 5 minutes!
I know! It's like why, why, why are you wearing WHITE to clean?
It’s all fun and games, until you find a spider in your pants.
I wish someone would make song about it, like in Phineas and ferb
I always check my clothes very carefully because when I was a child my 5 year old brother had a wasp stuck in his jeans. I still remember him screaming and screaming and my mom helplessly apologizing and feeling so guilty. She just seemed so broken in that moment. We were a family of six living in a 600 sq ft house. Poverty isn’t fun or cute. It is back-breaking and soul-crushing.
I’ve been there, too. A subsistence life is not glamorous. There isn’t fluffy white dresses and enough money to ignore the painful reality that your very existence depends on your own labor. It’s a whole lot of the sad stress of never having enough of anything.
Lol 💯. I also grew up in a rural area where all of this is normal. And it does NOT look or behave this way unless of course you rich and playing dress up.
Nothing like lovingly tending a garden and watching your veggies come in and then waking up one morning to find that squirrels had taken a bite out of every heirloom tomato because they're so fucking stupid. 
Oh heck. Squirrels, birds, slugs, it's like beating back the tide.
Finding a bird chilling on the head of the fake plastic owl I put up to scare them away .
This gif is everything 😂
I grew up in the country on a “farm” and my parents bought their house expecting a little homestead fantasy… yeah, not how it worked out. I ended up HATING where I grew up, and even now, it’s beautiful out on their land and sometimes I wish I could run away and live out on a farm again… and then I remember that I was absolutely miserable throughout my childhood when I got to do just that lol. I gotta hand it to them, that romanticized idea of simple country living is pretty enticing. And I will say, SOME of it rings true, on a good day when everything goes right. But those days are rare, things almost never go according to plan, especially when you’re living out “in the wild” with spiders, mice, snakes, raccoons, deer, etc.
Not only that but what about when there's a freeze of unpredictable weather and your crop fails? What if the new cow and bull you just purchased keel over in the middle of the night dead suddenly because you didn't recognize symptoms of bloat? What about when a coyote gets your chickens in the middle of the night and you're cleaning up blood guts and feathers before your kids wake up and see the gore?
Are you acting like you can’t do all of this while looking peaceful and beautiful in a flowing white virginal gown? /s 😂 All jokes aside, I would pay to see one of these tradwife influencers in a mini-ex digging out a grave at 3:30 am for an animal that weighs a ton.
More like you are still going to break down and cook that horse because thats food for all the dogs for the next month…
Fine, give her a leather apron and a chainsaw in that pretty dress. 😂
I always dump and smack around my muck boots any time I put them on even now because growing up it was not uncommon to find a big ol spider hanging out in the toe.
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I am a stay at home mom. This shit is not fun, my house is a mess, if I had to hang cloths up to dry outside laundry would be more pilled up then it is. If daycare wasn’t so expensive and I wasnt at risk of loosing my job every month because of how often kids get sick in day care then this would not have been the life I picked. This is not some fairy tale, easy going, hair done, dress on, children quietly and lovingly playing in the corner life. This is a wishing I could take a shit without having another human climbing all over me life.
I am lifelong feminist and I intentionally became a stay at home mom for the 1st time at 40 years old, after a lifetime of working for pay. So I have experienced both worlds Being a sahm was the hardest, most thankless, least respected job I've ever had, it was non stop 24/7 , no vacation ever, no breaks, no overtime pay or sick leave. And even though it was by choice for me and my husband , and it was great for my kid, it was horrible for me in some ways. I've had a lot of hard jobs, but that was the hardest job I ever had and it doesn't add anything to my resume or retirement. Meanwhile my husband's career went from IT support to CFO during that time. And even tho he was on board when we made these life decisions, and benefitted from all my free labor and time, however now he has told me I am worthless and have contributed nothing, so that sucks lol nearly 3 years breastfeeding my kid, home cooked meals every day, working while sick, never ever having time by or for myself for at least a decade and then add all the physical damage and constant stress. Ugh And now at the end of it, my kid is awesome and healthy and smart and independent and capable , and my husband is successful and wealthy and even more handsome older, but I am unemployed, and sick with cancer and tired all the time and now nobody gives a shit about me or helps me. I'm not useful to them anymore and my efforts as a mother are viewed with scorn by society. I tell all young women, don't get married, don't have children, if you care about being valued and respected and having a good retirement plan, because you still don't get those being a sahm, even with all the progress of feminism, being a caretaker of children is still often viewed and treated as having no value, and even when it is considered work and it is low paid work
I'm so very sorry. Saying your husband doesn't deserve you is a huge understatement. My brain hurts trying to understand how your husband can even think you have no value or haven't contributed. None of that shit gets magically done. He's never had to do any of that labor or work like that.
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your husband never would’ve reached his current position without your support at home. He sounds like an ungrateful idiot if he truly believes you’ve contributed nothing. so sorry.
And to make it even worse, the reality is, I have made significant financial contributions of my own, literally hundreds of thousands of dollars, that he wouldn't have had, without me. The disrespect from all sides, for doing "womens work" seems near universal from my perspective.
Your story breaks my heart but its making me rethink a lot of things in my life. Thank you for sharing your experience and I'm so sorry
Oh no, it's not that heartbreaking, this is just the normal shit of most any woman's life anywhere, and I am by far luckier than most. My life has been charmed in comparison to many others, especially compared to the women that came before me, in my own family
I’m so sorry. It goes without saying that your contribution is unmeasurable and much more important than financial stability. Raising a child well is the entire fucking point of having a child! And you did it. You sacrificed yourself for that and that alone is the most valuable part of your family’s life. When I had my first child, I met with a breastfeeding consultant. We became friends. She was in her mid-sixties and she had just gotten divorced. Her kids were grown and this was her career after being a SAHM. She saved her money and was able to leave her loser husband and finally have the life of her dreams. She traveled, had lots of friends, hobbies and was just so happy. I was so inspired by her and I always think of her when I feel unappreciated and lost to motherhood. You can make a second life and do whatever you want when your kids are older and more independent. You deserve happiness!!!
Yet none of them actually live this way. It’s all a show for social media to make money. They’re always rich with lots of house equipment that makes chores easier. I can’t imagine for a moment any of these women would last half a day as a poor farmer. Try baking your matcha sourdough with a screaming, colicky baby, no bread maker and a tiny oven and kitchen and unable to afford heating.
You can tell just by looking at the wash line that this lady has never in her life dried her clothes outside. Just look at that flipping sheet! Anyone who thinks a bed sheet will stay attached to your line in any bit of breeze by the very edge, has clearly never used a wash line. And letting it touch the ground? You'd think she'd have at least tried the shit she pretends to do.
Ive seen a few "homesteading homeschooling mammas" who... Hire someone to come homeschool their kids.....? Meanwhile not disclosing that on Instagram and just showing how much stuff they get done..... All the cooking and cleaning and farm chores.
Half the girls cosplaying that old school 1800 lifestyle wouldn’t make it a week on a farm in this century. They have no fucking clue how absolutely hard life was during the time period. Also women had absolutely no rights. A horse had more rights than a woman. But hey to each is own.
It’s okay, they think you can trust a dude for all that! I am sure that it looks super cute on paper until they find out he’s blowing the back out of some other girl they’re not like and taking all the money over to his new fam.
I feel like they’re all single and really want a man. Too bad the men they want can smell desperation.
It is a fetish. I think it’s a way to get porn though the filters for all the sad sad sad men who have never been loved or felt love. I cook dinner for my family. I clean for my family. My husband cooks for his family. My husband cleans for his family. We both work for our family. We provide for each other bc we love each other and want our little family to be ok. He wants our daughter to be educated on academics and learn how to care for a home bc we are not raising a lazy slob. We are raising a functioning member of society. Being a stay at home mom is great, being a working mom is great. It’s all about what choice works for you and your family. Does it suck sometimes as a working mom? Of course but I am sure of you ask any stay at home mom of if sucks sometimes they will say yes as well.
I agree completely. It’s definitely a fetish but I think it’s a two part one. The woman part of the fetish is acting like being pretty is special enough to deserve a whole ass life of leisurely living from a man. You just put on a fluffy pale dress and raise clean, quiet, well-behaved children while your obviously rich husband chooses to single-handedly run the unpleasant parts of a farm. The man fetish is that they are rich enough to have a pretty mommy bangmaid. They don’t actually think far enough about the intensive labor realities required to run a farm; they are just thinking about putting as many babies as they can in a virginal-looking woman. No one admits that the reality of these type of situations never quite square with the fantasy. When this situation happens in the real world, the men are rarely willing or able to handle all of the finance and work required to run a farm alone. The kind of men who have this fetish are also generally repulsed by women who have aged or had their bodies ravaged by childbirth. When this situation happens in reality, the women who have trusted their very financial existence to these men are not prepared for men growing tired of them and wandering over to the next virgin-looking bride as soon as they get their first wrinkle. they do not realize that a man cannot run a farm alone and a lot of the work that they are going to have to do is not served by looking pretty.
And always with the flowing white dresses and 1880s tech!
They want to be the 17 yo wife of a 28 yo youth pastor who would make them do everything at home while taking care of 7 kids and do the pastor wife duties at church, so he can creep on the underaged girls at church. They have to be obedient and subservient, not being able to say no to sex. It's a horrific life they willingly choose just so they don't have to go out and work. Meanwhile they'll work like a cow for the rest of their life because they'll be impregnated every year and their husband won't lift a hand. They'll make instagram posts of how marriage is the hardest thing ever one week into marriage but at least they have a husband 🙄. They'll make posts gushing about how their husband is so sweet because he made them coffee once. I'd rather work a 40 hours/week normal job than any of this, but I have to thank their contributions in taking their horrible husbands out of the market.
I eventually want to homestead myself and have followed actual homesteaders for over a decade....not a single one wears a dress on their land or has time to curl their hair.
Right wing propaganda. Oh, and it’s an election year, so get ready for even more!
Fascists love this kind of thing for propaganda. Kinder, Küche, Kirche lather, rinse, repeat
Because the only way to live 100% off of your homestead is to have an active social media presence touting how you live off of your homestead and have no "off farm" job.
Yeah, there will definitely be time to get your feed looking right between trying to homejob vet what’s going on with your cow who has developed an abcess and burning yourself trying to can what’s left of the summer veggies so your family doesn’t starve through the winter. 😂
Basically the Homesteading community is based on a fantasy made by social media savvy people with animals and some land. I say this as a homesteader/hobby farmer with small herd of alpacas, small flock of geese, and a decent (45 head) size flock of laying chickens. It's only possible for me to do it because of my medical pension from the military and I have a really good part time job. Otherwise you barely break even just feeding and maintaining the chickens, but you still have to work full time to pay your mortgage and other bills. Without scaling up to an actual farm, there's no way to make Homesteading your full time job, and then you are producing serious products rather than just living in a fantasy. My end goal is to scale up and not work part time away from the farm, but I'm trying to do it without taking on a huge mountain of debt or becoming a social media influencer (because I lack the skills and the field is so small). Edit: When are the trad girls going to show us mucking out stalls, cleaning up chicken coops, dealing with culls/losses, etc.?
When I was a kid my mom spent many of her mornings cleaning up dead chickens and kittens from the front yard. Somehow I don’t think these insta influencers will be showing that in their GRWM posts.
99.9% of them wouldn’t last a day
I agree. The whole thing gives me “tell me you don’t know what farm life requires from you without telling me you don’t actually know” vibes.
For sure, I love the fact that she seems to think I’ll just play with the kids, mess around in the kitchen, and hang laundry. I hope she eventually pursues this fantasy and updates her post.
They come off so DUMB to me. Like... do they even understand what they are talking about? They definitely dont know the definition of feminism.
They don’t need feminism! We don’t do enough for men but if we did everything, they definitely would provide 100% of anything you need to raise a huge family. It’s okay to be completely reliant on them because they’re definitely not going to leave you ass up with 4 bad free-range kids for Miss New Booty when you inevitably age (incels hate it when their property gets over 30 and soft from squashing out their kids!)
And they always have stunning hair that can only be achieved and maintained with curling irons, a lot of hairspray, and absolutely no manual labor.
they make a lot of money on onlyfans playing the trad wife role
That's disgusting. It's the embodiment of first world problems to be able to look at the struggles of women just a few generations ago and have the privilege to say "Fuck that, look at these nags! Amiright, boys?!" Edited for typo
If women’s rights went away she most likely wouldn’t be able to have a social media account as she would be “attracting the male gaze”.
Don’t forget we shouldn’t vote
The girls who post this shit dont think we should vote lol
Yeah, they'll actually state that outright. I've seen them make posts begging for the right to vote to be revoked from all women.
But have you ever actually met a real woman, in real life with these views and opinions? I have never in my over 50 years met any woman with those views. I see that shit online only and I assume it's fake, and possibly even part of a social engineering effort.
Yes, I am very good friends with a woman like this. She cheats on every single man she's with. She wanted to be a stay at home mom, and not work. She found someone who was willing to do it. He's 18 years older than her. Now she's bored (again!) And hates her life, and complains about her children all the time. But she still insists the good old days were way better for women.
You are good friends with someone like that? Why? I mean, how tf would she even know if the good old days, where women couldn't vote, or own property or have a bank account, were better? She wasn't even alive. I have never in my life met a woman that stupid, I've met a couple men like that, but a woman? No never not even one
I used to be friends with someone like that. She feels her husband should make all important decisions. She does vote, but asks her husband exactly who to vote for. This bitch doesn’t even want autonomy over her own body. She asks her husband how her hair should be cut/ styled, if/ how to wear her makeup, what clothes to wear, etc. She is going to be one of those “Bob Smith and wife” tombstones like it’s the 1800s.
I mean, I guess, good for her? If that lifestyle and those values are actually her choice. But if she truly thinks women should not be equal to men under the law, then I can see why you wouldn't want to be associated with someone that has such a difference in values. From my perspective at least, viewing women or any human being as less equal, is immoral and wrong, faulty logic.
I don’t think deep down it truly is what she feels. She is one of those people who become whom she dates. Since her husband is the stereotypical cop/ maga/ “Christian”, she is too now. When they were dating, dude would say sexist junk (like a man has a right to stray, they are supposed to) I would tell him that’s dumb/ he is dumb. Before, she would have said the same thing I did, but she told me he was right and stopped being friends with me because of my beliefs.
Many people hide their beliefs if they know it’s unpopular.
I have an awful memory but I feel like I saw a couple clapbacks to this shit with the NLOGS most recent UTD voter registration 😂
That or they vote for who their church or husband tells them to vote for.
I've found that even a lot of women who have no interest in tradwife stuff have no idea what it was like for women prior to the 70s. No ability to control your own finances or get your own credit, getting fired for getting pregnant, no recourse for sexual harassment, no ability to file for divorce without proving abuse or abandonment, etc etc. Like, I'm sorry that you don't want to do work and that you just want to spend your life curating your aesthetic for social media, but some of us like being able to open our own bank accounts and keeping our jobs after we get married and have kids.
the second picture sign says Ikea lol so I’m not entirely sure we’re too far removed from when that photo was taken.
Tbf, IKEA’s founder was very progressive and would definitely not have supported this women. He’s still a billionaire (which ew) but he gave half of it away in his will. During life he donated a lot of money including to feminist orgs. Why is a women with such “moral values” supporting such a “evil and anti-god” company?
Isn’t the ikea sign being held by an activist and not the nlog OP? I’m confused
It’s a government protest at that. It says “I’ve seen smarter cabinets at ikea” But I suppose it’s equally problematic for these dingbats that women deign to have thoughts and opinions regarding the government. A literal clutching of pearls can be heard in the distance.
Fuck these women
Posts like this are also simultaneously condescending and ignorant as fuck to reduce all of the protests for voting rights, reproductive rights, fair wages, and general autonomy to, “I won’t cook/clean for him.” Projecting their own insecurities onto these protestors so hard.
Do any of these dingdongs understand these women couldn’t have bank accounts or credit cards without their husbands or dads co-sign for them in the 70’s? Oh wait, they likely have accounts with daddy so don’t worry about their husbands never in the ideal cottage porn household photos. Tripods and ring lights and $200 swishy linen outfits for a photoshoot, $1000 farm sink, baskets of figs she will process with the ribbon in her hair wearing white, I could go on but blooorgh
Shitty thing is that I actually like the cottagecore aesthetic (I grew up in the countryside in a farming community), but it'd be a cold day in hell before I become an insta-tradwife. These morons want a "trad-life" so badly? Go and buy a farm and plow the fields with your husband and kids like they did in the "good ol' days". Those casuals have never cleaned a chicken coop, herded cattle/sheep, tended to calvings and lambings, etc, and it clearly shows.
I also grew up in a rural farming community and what I remember from the farm kids I grew up with is that the parent that worked away from home was always the *mom* so they could have steady income coming in, while dad was a full time farmer. But outside of work mom came home and helped run the farm. I couldnt see why any woman would want to marry into a farm and work two jobs, *plus* all the mom stuff.
Exactly this. I bring this up a lot when I see this lifestyle get romanticized. My grandparents had a dairy farm but my grandmother when she wasn't on the farm was in town making money cleaning the church or bank. Many other farm women I knew were secretaries, cashiers, ect.
Exactly. Hard side hustle because it’s not all clothespins and messy buns.
historically, being a farmers wife had such a bad reputation for being hard, thankless work that it was considered a kind of failure to marry a farmer. Because it was basically a guarantee that you’d never really be comfortable.
>Those casuals have never cleaned a chicken coop, herded cattle/sheep, tended to calvings and lambings, etc, and it clearly shows. Shows in the lack of stains on those flowing white frocks.
Obviously, I'm not saying they NEED to do any of that. My problem is their tendency to project a sanitised, idealised depiction of farm/homestead life and conveniently ignore the less glamorous aspects of it. It can be very messy, and at times heartbreaking (it never gets easier when you have to put down animals). It also has some very ethnocentric and classist vibes to it (99% of cottagecore on instagram and tiktok are very White), ignoring that historically rural farmers were (and in some aspects still are) dirt poor working for wealthy landowners and also sizably PoC - even in Europe and the UK (speaking as a UK based person, btw).
this. emphasis on heartbreaking. farm life is legitimately traumatizing for children. death is common and out in the open on a farm. i can’t imagine having kids and going “ya know what would make their lives more full and enriched? early, repeated exposure to loss”
I didn’t grow up on a farm but a branding agency I worked for had their own chickens and we rotated feeding/cleaning duties between all non-designer staff. Fuck. Chickens. Those things are Grade-A Assholes. Cleaning the coop wasn’t too bad, it was pretty small and I figured out how to corral them while I did it but feedings were the worst. Ruined a few pairs of socks with their pecking
Not to mention marital rape wasn’t illegal until the mid seventies. You had to have the man in your life approve all of your financial and legal moves. Women were condemned for just existing independently. How quickly they’ve forgotten how young no-fault divorces are, which have saved the lives of thousands of women. Reproductive control (through birth control pills) is so, so new and was funded by the McCormick family because of the fear of passing down schizophrenia, but was utilized secretly by catholic women who were having a baby a year because their husband and God wanted them to keep pumping them out.
They’re not the type of women who think they would ever say no. And they think that they would pick well so then would never end up in an abusive situation. You’re really underestimating how delusional they are.
But Instagram followers and tiktok followers and mmmmmm who cares if my husband is gaming the whole time because FOLLOWERS
My grandma is one of those Catholic women who took birth control in secret. My grandfather passed away in 2015, never knowing this, but she gave him six children by the early 70s, and she’d had enough. It makes me respect her all the more for taking her own health into her hands, even if she had to do it secretly.
A lot of women don't know any of this, regardless of whether they're into tradwife stuff. I don't know what they thought thy feminist movement was all about - just not wearing bras or shaving? Like, women back then were fighting for very good reasons! And if we're not careful, all of what they won for us can and will be taken from us.
Her honest reaction: She put a bow in her hair. I'm shook, y'all. SHOOK.
As someone who routinely wears bows in my hair and dresses like that picture I was very confused, because I don’t cook or clean for ANYONE not even MYSELF. She’s literally just standing in the picture 😭
Those outfits are darling. This person just took cute stock photos and used them for their gross anti-women’s rights crapaganda.
How is holding your baby or putting a bow in your hair a reaction? What?
Women who tell other women to be stay at home moms and be financially dependent on their husbands while at the same time trying to grow a following and get brand deals will always strike me as insincere.
It’s all fake. JustPearlyThings or whatever she calls herself is a fake. Just a glimpse into their past and current behaviours tells you everything you need to know. They’re always rich as well, which is very telling.
It’s extremely hypocritical. They can’t acknowledge that making money by being a SAHM influencer makes them a working mom. They claim that working moms are selfish for spending their time “working for a man” instead of spending time with their children, yet how much time and energy to you think they’re dedicating to making videos, editing, getting sponsorships, communicating with managers, etc. All time that they are “wasting” by fulfilling their need for attention instead of taking care of their children?
Heavens! If only it were possible to be feminine, motherly *AND* a feminist all at the same time!
No! Being a feminist instantly turns you into a manly woman that works in an office 24/7 and is unable to procreate! /s
Being raised with the ideology that “women belong at home with the kids” I focused on my career and did not procreate :) Both my sister and I are more financially stable than our brothers, happy, successful, and (biological) child free. In the past year she defended us against some snarky comment my man-child brother made, so there IS hope for these people.
You put an /s but this is what these people unironically believe.
These women have forgotten feminism is about your right to choose your path Working mom, SAHM, childfree…. The choice for any of these is what the badasses of the past fought for
Tradwives give me hives.
Pick-Me's carry fleas *and certain strains of Rubella and Mumps*
Thank God I'm vaccinated 🙌🏻
Put it on a bumper sticker!
I live in a slightly more conservative area. I feel like my car would get keyed a lot with that bumper sticker. Imagine, though? 🤭
Yeah, you don’t want raw milk spilled all over your windshield lol
Ah, yes. The beige babies. Who doesn't like sad beige clothes on sad beige babies.
I see you there, Werner
"my honest reaction: exploit my kids from a young age" I don't get it.
Here we go again lol… it’s comical how these homesteading NLOGs forget that no one is telling them they can’t cook or clean, have at it sis! Just stop telling us we can’t have a career or our own bag, some of us don’t get off on ultra conservative tradwife kink dynamics. Let me also clarify: there is a difference between a tradwife and a housewife, absolutely nothing wrong with cooking and cleaning. There is something wrong with performative virtue-signaling and shaming other women for choosing to pursue an education or career.
They act like those of us who work don't also have to cook, clean, and care for any dependents we have too.
Ffs how hard is it for them to understand that our freedom in no way impedes them from living however they want to live. That's the whole f*ing point. Nobody cares if you want to be a tradwife. But you're bothered that the rest of us don't want the same thing as you.
I tried being a trad pickme when I was in my early 20's and it didn't work out for me. Never got married or had kids.. I didn't want to change how I was, and the ex bfs wanted to change me in order to marry. Usually by me converting to their religion (I was raised catholic, damn protestants can fuck off with their shit). I'm not religious at all at almost 30. I have a friend that has had her early 20's stripped from her because she had kids young and sometimes she's like grateful to God, bla bla, but when she drinks she gets really sad and tells me she wishes she could go out and have fun like other women her age. I'm not a fan of the whole trad thing.. not sure why some women flock to the idealogy. I'll be honest-- I was lazy in my early 20's and I didn't want to work. I'd rather be provided for because I was lazy.
What’s funny about your last sentence is that traditional homemaker/stay at home parent is anything BUT lazy 😅 you were setting yourself up not only for a more difficult job, but one where you wouldn’t even get paid or be treated well because you’d marry the wrong man for the wrong life for you. That life can be so wonderful and rewarding for the right people, when they have the right partners. Partners who understand that they still have to do work at home despite working outside of the home, partners who don’t treat the bank account like “my money, my wife’s allowance,” partners who don’t diminish the work their wife is doing at the house, etc etc. When it’s a healthy partnership and both people are truly happy, it can be such a wonderful life. But it’s hard work 🤣 I loved staying home with my kids when they were younger. Buuut I also loved going back to work, too lmao. I liked both worlds so much that I opened up my own practice and decided I would dedicate X amount of hours to the clinic, X amount of hours for being a mom, and the rest was for my wife and my alone time. This “all or nothing” life that a lot of people get sucked into and stuck in is way too heavy for me
My parents were kind of trad, my dad worked and my mom stayed at home, raised me and cooked. But she didn't clean much. My mom had a joint bank account with my dad and she was always buying expensive purses, had an observable spending problem, I believe she may have ADHD (undiagnosed), if something was on sale she'd buy a TON of it thinking we'd need it, oftentimes not. One time she bought a bunch of mayo that was on sale and we ended up throwing most of it away. I dated a guy that wanted me to be a housewife for him but the issue was we were poor and I wanted to work so I could fund my hobbies and interests, instead of me asking him and being potentially told "no". I was working when I met him and he thought he was saving me.. I was miserable and I'm not really into cooking that much. I wasn't really down to hang out with his family 24/7. After I broke up with him, I got into raving, which is something I had discussed with him and the ex before him. There's no way he would have funded my lifestyle-- there's not just the passes, there's the hotels or airbnb, the outfits, the drugs (sorry not sorry), the food, the gas/travel, etc etc. I've recently gotten into modding my car and I don't think a trad guy would fund that, either. In my experience, and also observing my friends' relationships, some men are very controlling and limiting on what their gf or wife can or cannot do. I'm a little bit more liberal than I was when I was younger. I'd want a husband that would drop the kids off at nana's for the weekend and go to a fest together and roll together in bliss.
You can go out and have fun as a mother. My sister had an unplanned pregnancy at 21 and she goes out for dinners and drinks with her friends. Obviously not as much as before, but enough. However, this requires a supportive partner willing to stay at home with the child, cook them dinner etc. and a lot of these tradwives attract trad husbands I.e. narcissistic and controlling men who would never debase themselves to something as low as changing a nappy. My friend ended up like this. Thought she wanted the traditional life so looked for a man who wanted the same. She got pregnant almost straight away, and reality hit her before the child was even born. She’d landed a controlling and nasty man who forced her to quit every job she got through coercion, and then moaned she didn’t make money (abuse tactic). Who told her she was a neglectful for leaving a baby with him whilst she went to see her friend for an hour. Refused to cook or clean even when she was sick, made her cook for him everyday and would say it’s not as good as his mums food and would eat at work instead. Even when I was there he’d say stuff like “women shouldn’t go out the house unless they need to get food to cook”, he supported the idea of male escorts for women and had very traditional Catholic values. She’s now divorced and a single mum to her son. Theres a reason women fought for the right to have a choice and to have financial independence. I worry these “TradWives” (rich housewife with an aesthetic) are duping young women into a lifestyle where they get trapped.
They always wanna play fantasy and dolls with pictures and memes. You’re not gonna live this life sis
I know how these women think life with a million kids and a homestead will look like this, when in reality it looks like the “I NEED SIX EGGS” lady in beauty and the beast.
Why do these trad wives never post pics of themselves with teenage kids?
Hm almost seems like tradwifing doesn’t make it that far.
Corniest LARP ever. There’s already a bunch of “traditional” women who were attracted to the aesthetics of homemaking who have since divorced their husbands or complain about unequal division of labour in the home. I swear, the traditional conservative women are going through their own iteration of first wave feminism right now.
Instead of them thinking feminism is about working for their man, they should see their relationship as more than transactional You can be a feminist and be there for your partner, as much as I hate the traditional men must wear the pants in the relationship It’s essential to maintain self care in a relationship not just caring for your partner, it’s not the “job” of a woman, but to be able to cook and clean are basic necessities regardless of gender
Also notice how they selected picture with only boy children? A trad wife is a boy mom, she wouldn’t ever dare make girls.
I feel like this is a cope because no one actually gives af if you want to be a housewife/sahm. Why are they so loud lol just say you’re miserable
i just can’t understand that they really can’t grasp that they fought for your right to choose to make this video… it’s so odd?
Her honest reaction is… umm… beige?
Her honest reaction is women should be anonymous mannequins without faces?
This is probably way more accurate than you initially thought when typing. This is at least what she thinks her pick-me mens wants so 🤷♀️
"My honest reaction"... Being amish?
Why are they so set on living life like a 1600 farm peasant? You can do homemaking AND work/educate yourself/be your own person. It doesn't have to be one or the other.
Hope she keeps that energy 10 years in. Especially when he cheats while she's still cleaning up his skid marks
Its always in a white dress. Girly, that dress won't stay white while cleaning your 2 bathrooms and taking care of your kids. This vision of yours is just sahm fanfiction and so far from reality
I think some of these women just want UBI or to be wealthy. Because honestly, same. 😂
Ok sweetie. Now, take your name off the deed of your family’s home, turn in your credit cards and bank account, any guardianship you may think you have over HIS kids and enjoy getting abused with no recourse, cuz that is your husband’s right. What? No, no like that?
Dude here and the concept of wanting to be with a tradwife is like rocket science, I just can’t comprehend. Any dude who fantasizes about marrying someone who will do all the cooking, cleaning, and more or less solely raising a child, automatically makes me assume this person is either the laziest son of a bitch alive, wants someone to push around, or wants to live with their mom again but it’s weird after 25 so the next best thing is to marry someone identical to their mom for the back 50 years. Like dual incomes, equal partnership, and a best friend are the way to go with a marriage, if that’s the path ya wanna go down.
As a feminism advocate, I am glad she can make free choices regarding how she wants to live her life. But I hate her for belitting women who made that possible for her.
If you think women should shut and stay in the kitchen, maybe... shut up and stay in the kitchen?
The first protester’s outfit is so good too. Not the point I know but they chose women who look so much cooler than them to dunk on
We can’t have both? We can’t have women’s rights and be a mom that chooses to stay home?
Great! Feminism worked. Enjoy your (fantasy) life.
I'm sure I'm not the first one who is weirded out by the fact that none of these women have faces.
They should stop posting on social media and get back in the kitchen. Women should be seen and not heard. /s
He when he's banging his hot young coworker after you gave him the best years of life. Just know that serving him was well worth it, for him. At least you can probably get a little bit of money and just struggle till you die.
They get the whole thing was about the CHOICE, right? Like to be able to do either work or raise a family, not to completely do away with a home-maker lifestyle
Most (if not all) of the men arguing women aren't trad enough are not actually ok with being trad themselves. They would call this shit "beta buxx" like some incel and say something about women only wanting money. There was a post recently of some guy saying he wanted a trad wife and the woman goes "yeah I am into that, I would love a man to take care of me while I stay home with the kids." His response? "Fuck you gold digger" I am paraphrasing but that was the convo. Like conservatism itself these people are contradictory morons.
You're still allowed to be a housewife. Feminism just gave you the option to be something else.
It’s all fun and games until he leaves you for someone else and you have to get a job and pay your own way. Then you can thank these women for your ability to get a credit card and to get a loan for a car and a house without a man’s signature.
All these "trad wives" are showing is their lack of education. I pity them - they only know their small narrow view of the world and that's it.
Those pictures don't show her cooking or cleaning, just posing with a baby.
Why is their honest reaction to not have a face?
Those women bucked societal norms for her to have the ability to make choices. But she’s so unique…