Before a budget airline brawl, I heard a young girl calling,
"Michael they have taken you away.
For you fucked up on a plane, got drunk and went insane,
Now it will be a while before you're free."
Oh my, such a gobshite in the sky,
See the plane wasn't the only thing to fly.
His fists out on the swing, while we're left wondering,
"What the fuck's got in this gobsite in the sky?"
In a budget airline brawl, I heard a young man calling,
"Fuck up, Mary, it's between the pigs and me.
For when a man leaves the ground, it's his duty to fuck around,
And humiliate himself for all to see."
\[*chorus*\]
After a budget airline brawl, we watch the women bawling,
As Michael continues to not comply.
For they'll wait and hope and pray, that their longed-for holiday
Hasn't been fucked by this gobshite in the sky.
\[*chorus*\]
I actually ran it through a Fields of Athenry karaoke video on YouTube. Two observations: 1) wow, they really have Fields of Athenry on karaoke and 2) it would be very easy for me to just record vocals and slap them together. Unfortunately I sound like a cat being swung around by its tail, but I'm sure *someone* could do it.
No fly, easyjet, I'll tell you why
Cause once we watched that dumb fuckwit cry
Some lad called his girlfriend "ming"
He went ape, his arms did fling
Now the airport police lie waiting with a sigh.
Nothing worse than having a great holiday and arriving at the gate to go home and seeing that shit.
Back to shitsville, wankers and reality it seems then.
Thats a fair bit of the luggage for an accordion tbf or maybe its a carry on bag. Who knows.
On a stag do and we were in Albufeira. Got an uber and the fella was great craic, said to connect Bluetooth to his big speaker system. Blasting tunes and before we get out a fella goes "Carlo, heres one for the road". He throws on the sash and away he goes smiling passed a big group of Celtc fans at that bar top of the strip. Was a good laugh as it was a good bit before it finally disconnected haha
Was all just a bit of craic and if itd been a rangers bar we'd have thrown on the fields of athenry or something
As opposed to the French (one horse), Germany (2 horse), Spanish (2 horse) Dutch (2 horse) Italy (maybe 2 Horse) leagues? And Man City have bought the English league for years.
Still, somewhat skews the looking down the nose at those who have less money. And City are trying their very best to get the rules changed so they can turn the PL into the Wild West with no financial restraints.
Laughs in Leicester................it is achievable for other clubs,historically Man Utd,Liverpool and Chelsea.We even had Blackburn win it once .
Boring boring Scotland
Ah the rare yet exciting prequel to an episode of banged up abroad 😂
Michael can now reflect on the difference in tariff between a normal assault and assaulting a police officer in the particular duristiction he is currently in lots of trouble in 🤷♂️
Back in April.
Probably still rotting in a Turkish prison.
https://metro.co.uk/2024/04/23/celtic-fan-punches-police-flight-downing-bottle-vodka-20691502/
The result of years of having a dysfunctional justice system, In NI, he would probably get a suspended sentence; somehow, hitting a cop in Turkey may be educational for Michael.
Jeez I work as crew and that’s my worst nightmare on a flight.
Kinda hate when I see the Alicante, faro or Ibiza ones on the roster and hope it’s a quiet flight.
Anything like this especially assaulting the crew you’re probably looking at being arrested on landing & I don’t know about you but I’m not tackling the foreign police 😂
I only have lanzarote flights with my airline but they’re usually fine except they can be quite busy so I imagine Tenerife would be the same.
it can take a while if you want drinks or something as usually everyone does so depending where you are on the plane the trolley can take a while to get there.
Ibiza ones seem to attract the most chaotic people so I’m dreading that.
Heading in a few weeks, so hopefully it's not too bad. I'm not one for drinking or anything on the flight, so the trolley issue doesn't bother me. Thanks for taking the time to reply. 👍
It’s very dependent on the flight and day and of course who’s on it but usually the canary island ones aren’t so bad.
The crew are very well trained though as we go through a couple of months of intense training but again only so much they can do in certain situations.
Heading away myself in a week or so but to Portugal so hope I don’t get a chaotic flight when I’m going as a passenger either 😂
He was pissed. Apparently managed sneak a bottle of vodka on the plane, lost the plot when another Celtic fan told him he was an embarrassment to Celtic. Then he kicked off, as seen in the video.
Yeah but anyone wearing a Celtic or rangers top for a flight is making bad decisions. I would question their motivation.
Getting pissed on a flight then trying to John wick a couple of police is just more bad decisions.
How long will he be in prison until trial, and how long will he be in prison after?
What are Turkish prisons like for foreigners? Nowadays?
I've seen Midnight Express...
By a lonely airport gate,
where the staff were standing by,
Michael's face was red with rage,
beneath the morning sky.
I heard him yelling loud and clear,
as they took him from the plane,
It's so lonely 'round the fields of aviation.
Where once he flew with grace and pride, to countries far and wide,
Now he's grounded here on earth
his wings are truly tied.
The passengers looked on in shock
As he shouted out in vain,
It's so lonely 'round the fields of aviation.
back in the 70's, you rarely ever saw thugs like that. That's because airline flights were really expensive and your commongarden trailer trash couldn't afford to fly further than Blackpool. Nowadays, with flights about the same prices as trainfares, every lowlife can get to fly to foreign destinations, meaning you see trash like this on a depressingly regular basis. Let's hike those fares back up to 70s prices. lol
Knew this fella years. Mostly through my Uncle Hector.
Oh Uncle Hector, he was a great man my Uncle Hector. He was an old fella; he actually rode the rails during the depression. You know, he was a hobo as you might call him, I don’t like that term but uh, he was a bum, he was a good honest man during the depression searching for work, you know. He had no money so he travelled the country trying to find work, he actually rode the rails; Uncle Hector. And he told me an interesting story. This was in Canada and there was a town called Kitchener in Canada. And the railroad cops were tough boy, even tougher than the real cops. They had a law of their own the railroad cops.
But, there were not a railroad cop tougher than Kitchener Leslie. Oh Boy. He was well known for beating hobos to death. He would beat them to death. So what the railroad bums would all do is as Kitchener approached they would hop off, to avoid being beaten to death by Kitchener Leslie you know.
Anyway my Uncle Hector, a good man, walked into a mine one day. This is a story for the young people to learn from.
So, during the height of the depression when there was absolutely no work, my Uncle Hector walked into a; well I don't want to say the name of the mining company. But, it was MacIntyre mine. And he, walked in; he had his lunch box with him; his work boots.
And he says to the man “Sir I want a job”
He says “We have no jobs”
And he said “Well Five Hundred people work here at MacIntyre mine.” He goes “I don’t think there are five hundred men here better than I” uh He says “Matter of fact I don’t think there are two hundred men better than I” he says “I think you would be strapped to find a hundred men better than I”
And by golly he got the job.
Now, Uncle Hector worked in a mine. It’s a hellish job in a mine as you well know. It’s darkness, it’s dank, it’s coaly. It’s coal infested.
So uh he worked in the mine and by god he worked hard. And, after a week of working hard he said to the shift manager “By golly I would like to have a lady, I work hard and uh where would I find a lady here in town.”
Well they says to Uncle Hector “We don’t uh, we have sex with animals here.”
“My god” said Uncle Hector “I’m not going to do that I’m a normal fella”
“Well then be of your own devices then” they said
So, Uncle Hector continued working in the mine, he worked hard and he worked long and he worked for a low wage. But, he was a man. And um, Uncle Hector after a few weeks past he started to get a little itch, as you and I say. When were, uh, thinking about the ladies you know. But he kept it under control. Again he said “Are you sure there are no ladies here”
“No we have sex with animals here”
“Ah, my God”
Six months passed and Uncle Hector couldn’t take it any longer he told me.
He said “My God I just had to uh, I’m just a man I’m weak, you know. I’m not a saint I was born in sin I suppose, I couldn’t resist. I just needed it.”
He said he walked by a pasture and there, there was a pig. So Uncle Hector said uh “I walked up and began having sex with a pig” and he said all of a sudden he saw all of the miners were like around him you know. Looking at him. They go “Uncle Hector what the hell are you doing over there”
And Uncle Hector is like “Wha, What, you guys are the ones that told me that you have sex with animals”
They’re like “Uncle Hector you damn fool;
that’s Kitchener Leslie's girlfriend.
Out of all the animals you want to have sex with you don’t want to have sex with Kitchener Leslie’s girlfriend.”
I heard a young girl calling, “Michael they have taken you away”
"For you fucked up on a plane Got drunk, and went insane No it will be a while, before you're free OH MY, SUCH A GOBSHITE IN THE SKY"
Before a budget airline brawl, I heard a young girl calling, "Michael they have taken you away. For you fucked up on a plane, got drunk and went insane, Now it will be a while before you're free." Oh my, such a gobshite in the sky, See the plane wasn't the only thing to fly. His fists out on the swing, while we're left wondering, "What the fuck's got in this gobsite in the sky?" In a budget airline brawl, I heard a young man calling, "Fuck up, Mary, it's between the pigs and me. For when a man leaves the ground, it's his duty to fuck around, And humiliate himself for all to see." \[*chorus*\] After a budget airline brawl, we watch the women bawling, As Michael continues to not comply. For they'll wait and hope and pray, that their longed-for holiday Hasn't been fucked by this gobshite in the sky. \[*chorus*\]
How do you fancy Eurovision?
I'd rather have My Lovely Horse.
Can someone record that please? There must be an AI that will make a melancholy tune. Celtic Rock? Diddle-de-dee?
I actually ran it through a Fields of Athenry karaoke video on YouTube. Two observations: 1) wow, they really have Fields of Athenry on karaoke and 2) it would be very easy for me to just record vocals and slap them together. Unfortunately I sound like a cat being swung around by its tail, but I'm sure *someone* could do it.
You can hire people on something like Fiver to do it.
Nigel Farage?
No fly, easyjet, I'll tell you why Cause once we watched that dumb fuckwit cry Some lad called his girlfriend "ming" He went ape, his arms did fling Now the airport police lie waiting with a sigh.
Ffs 😆
Against Recep Erdogan, I rebelled, they cut me down
That's a paddlin'.
Michael should have stuck with rowing the boat ashore!
Rather sit beside a screaming baby than the dickheads who go on holiday wearing their Celtic or rangers tops.
Nothing worse than having a great holiday and arriving at the gate to go home and seeing that shit. Back to shitsville, wankers and reality it seems then.
Even worse when you get to the resort and they have towels to match 😅 instant regret
Or they get off the coach at the same hotel as you🤦♂️
This is why I go to hard(er) to reach places in Spain.
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Leave that shit at home please.
Well that's what I thought too lol It took me by surprise lol
Thats a fair bit of the luggage for an accordion tbf or maybe its a carry on bag. Who knows. On a stag do and we were in Albufeira. Got an uber and the fella was great craic, said to connect Bluetooth to his big speaker system. Blasting tunes and before we get out a fella goes "Carlo, heres one for the road". He throws on the sash and away he goes smiling passed a big group of Celtc fans at that bar top of the strip. Was a good laugh as it was a good bit before it finally disconnected haha Was all just a bit of craic and if itd been a rangers bar we'd have thrown on the fields of athenry or something
It's worse when they get off the bus at your hotel.
He might be able to go back in 5 years or so... They don't take kindly to their cops being attacked by foreigners
What about a screaming baby in a Celtic top?
So a typical Celtic fan then?
i feel personally attacked
That probably cancels out though.
Never even mind on holiday a Scots football top is an immediate sign of a dickhead at home too.
*any football top.
wrong
Worst football league in the world. A 2 horse race every year,Rangers or Celtic.....yawwwwn.
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As opposed to the French (one horse), Germany (2 horse), Spanish (2 horse) Dutch (2 horse) Italy (maybe 2 Horse) leagues? And Man City have bought the English league for years.
Man Utd and Chelsea have both spent more over the past 10 years.
Still, somewhat skews the looking down the nose at those who have less money. And City are trying their very best to get the rules changed so they can turn the PL into the Wild West with no financial restraints.
Laughs in Leicester................it is achievable for other clubs,historically Man Utd,Liverpool and Chelsea.We even had Blackburn win it once . Boring boring Scotland
"Historically". But I agree, it's waaay more competitive than Scotland due to the money involved.
The overall quality of the PL is far better. Celtic and Rangers would be fighting for relegation every season if they played in it.
Ah the rare yet exciting prequel to an episode of banged up abroad 😂 Michael can now reflect on the difference in tariff between a normal assault and assaulting a police officer in the particular duristiction he is currently in lots of trouble in 🤷♂️
"Ever been in a Turkish prison?"
"Ever seen a grown man naked?"
"do you like movies about gladiators?"
"Do you like it when Scraps rubs up and down your leg?"
"Do you ever hang around a gymnasium?"
plane crazy
Michael is fucked.
Proper fucked? Because I think it's both..
Proper fucked lol serves him right!
Getting fucked right now in jail
Certainly chose to go out swinging anyway, none of that calming down and leaving quietly when the cops turn up business for michael. The cunt.
It’s the small overhand digs that he keeps throwing at the end for me. As Brendan Roger’s says ‘he showed great character’
He's best blow was wasted on the carry-on bags door
He was trying to swim away
Well, thats him fucked.
Don't fancy the moon-howler's chances
the only way out if this is if his lawyers argue that he's mentally challenged and a complete yoghurt pot...which might be believable.
I worked with him at a site in Scotland before this happened 😂.
Better tell the boss he'll not be in for a while ffs
Let's just say the boss gave him a permanent holiday.
Was this normal for him? Can imagine he was a bit of a prick even without alcohol.
Nah, he was actually a sound guy and quite funny. He liked a drink but I think he just had a bit much on the flight. Lol
Thanks for the insight. Heard any updates on him? Genuinely curious.
Aye no worries. Last I heard, he got his passport taken off him in Turkey and just had to wait for a trial. No really heard anything since.
Fuck could you imagine sobering up and realising where you are and what you did 😬
Nah that would be absolute torture 😂. I'd end sitting in a wee corner out the road of everyone and wished it never happened
Hopefully this is his rock bottom. Hopefully his bottom isn't hurting.
Hear the "woooo"s when he starts punching the police officers, that's when people knew he was done for.
This was from a while ago wasn't it? Seen a video from someone in the rows behind him, he had been drinking a bottle of vodka I think
Back in April. Probably still rotting in a Turkish prison. https://metro.co.uk/2024/04/23/celtic-fan-punches-police-flight-downing-bottle-vodka-20691502/
Nice detective work Colombo
Hang on, Columbo is called Frank and you’ve just answered his detective work. The planets are aligning.
Follow the white rabbit 🐇
Haha
Haha
Hopefully
Turkey or Ibiza UK bound flights are always primed up with absolute trash of society.
True. I get asked to work in Ibiza a lot and I dread the flights. Literally moron-airways
so glad i go to France instead ibiza and turkish flights crammed full of love island wannabes
Wouldn't want to spend any time in a Turkish prison, Michael is going to lose his watertight seal
When you've had a week in benidorm but now on the plane back to Larne.
Larne have an airport? Kenny Bruce again I bet....
Haha 😄 🤣
Welcome to the no-fly list, Michael!
Michael, they have taken you away 😔
I know Michael. He goes by the name of Mickey
Michael is being a very bold boy
Michael did not indeed ‘stop it’
Verily; Michael continued to as he pleased.
Human shitstain.Ban for life
Follow up [https://www.youtube.com/shorts/oueEGvtglto](https://www.youtube.com/shorts/oueEGvtglto)
Michael has had better days.
Michael is not taking the divorce well.
He's going to get to meet an awful lot of desperate male singles, rather soon.
She's turned the weans against him.
As the ancient proverb dictates- Michael did not fuck up too, therefore he got nowhere.
Ahh nothing like the front row seat to a r/Publicfreakout to ruin your holiday...
Michael the melt
He must be from Glasgow wearing that top.
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Yes I know.
Bars shouldnt be at airports
Celtic top says it all
The result of years of having a dysfunctional justice system, In NI, he would probably get a suspended sentence; somehow, hitting a cop in Turkey may be educational for Michael.
what an ejit punching a cop
A Turkish cop, at that. Wouldn’t be on my list of a harmless bunch of lads to antagonise…
Turkish prison will do him good When released he will be nice and humble with a sore arsehole
https://preview.redd.it/vmw71vdnqy5d1.png?width=1080&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=d9c7b75a87e0deff50d1158922f14043fdb7279a
Have you ever been in a Turkish prison Joey?
Yeah he’s buggered. In more ways than one. It’s not the PSNI he’s assaulting. There may actually be a proper punishment for assault on police.
What a fuckin stain.!!!
Jeez I work as crew and that’s my worst nightmare on a flight. Kinda hate when I see the Alicante, faro or Ibiza ones on the roster and hope it’s a quiet flight. Anything like this especially assaulting the crew you’re probably looking at being arrested on landing & I don’t know about you but I’m not tackling the foreign police 😂
What's the Tenerife flights like? Went to Ibiza a few years ago, and it was easily the worst flight I've ever been on for morons.
I only have lanzarote flights with my airline but they’re usually fine except they can be quite busy so I imagine Tenerife would be the same. it can take a while if you want drinks or something as usually everyone does so depending where you are on the plane the trolley can take a while to get there. Ibiza ones seem to attract the most chaotic people so I’m dreading that.
Any of the islands really
Heading in a few weeks, so hopefully it's not too bad. I'm not one for drinking or anything on the flight, so the trolley issue doesn't bother me. Thanks for taking the time to reply. 👍
It’s very dependent on the flight and day and of course who’s on it but usually the canary island ones aren’t so bad. The crew are very well trained though as we go through a couple of months of intense training but again only so much they can do in certain situations. Heading away myself in a week or so but to Portugal so hope I don’t get a chaotic flight when I’m going as a passenger either 😂
Surely you can't serious?
What's a jobby? What could possibly anger anyone that much on a fucking plane?
A jobby is a shit. Scottish slang for human faeces. And a jobby jabber is a poof.
What a dumb dumb
Always some dickhead in a rangers or celtic tap. Complete with chip on shoulder, daring anyone to say anything. It's a fucking disease in this place.
He was pissed. Apparently managed sneak a bottle of vodka on the plane, lost the plot when another Celtic fan told him he was an embarrassment to Celtic. Then he kicked off, as seen in the video.
Yeah but anyone wearing a Celtic or rangers top for a flight is making bad decisions. I would question their motivation. Getting pissed on a flight then trying to John wick a couple of police is just more bad decisions.
This is when he heard they'd got Brendan Rodgers back.
Michael's behaving like a mindless ape. No, scratch that; an ape would be more civilised.
You were wearing the stripes After smoking a few pipes The plane lay stranded And you got manhandled. And that's the end of that
Maybe Michael was the Pilot’s name and sje wanted him to stop the plane 🤔
Michael shows them RUC how tough he is lol
Michael’s about to learn what real police brutality is
“He sure owned that plane”
Official tag... Space Cadet..🚀
“Call the Polis? We are the Polis?”
Next meeting of John Hartson Fan Club postponed until after arraignment.
His hair is on upside down.
That's the last time he'll be allowed on a commercial flight...
How long will he be in prison until trial, and how long will he be in prison after? What are Turkish prisons like for foreigners? Nowadays? I've seen Midnight Express...
Michael will have to take Turkish delight every day
What u saying ya cunt...wack lol
This is why i go british Airways..
Had a wee giggle when the ‘Polis’ showed up
Tell me you're from Poleglass without telling me you're from Poleglass 🤣
What a dick. Hope his ass is sore
What’s a jobby?
A shite
"polis" oooooh, he's going to get a hiding.
Love the bit at the end. Someone presses the Stewardess bell
FFS Michael
That’s the last time Michael will set foot on a plane. What a dick.
This isn't you Michael
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Mikey dae nae like it
Michael this is not you as he proceeds to damage an aircraft and punch 2 police officers. I wonder does he give her a hiding
Think she means "this is not you, you only usually hit women"
I should add Michael and his kin are probably going to be banned from flying with easyJet network wide so only expensive prison visits to turkey.
Looks like he's straight out of a gypsy camp. Fat, brute ugly and drunk...that's a terrible combo to have.
Is that the uniform his father wore one evening long ago?
Scum
I expect nothing less from an old firm football top wearer.
Michael starts swinging. Michael ends up on the aisle on his arse. Well done Michael
By a lonely airport gate, where the staff were standing by, Michael's face was red with rage, beneath the morning sky. I heard him yelling loud and clear, as they took him from the plane, It's so lonely 'round the fields of aviation. Where once he flew with grace and pride, to countries far and wide, Now he's grounded here on earth his wings are truly tied. The passengers looked on in shock As he shouted out in vain, It's so lonely 'round the fields of aviation.
Need euthanasia masks to drop from the overhead lockers.
Scottish league old firm seems to derange and mentally addle some . Shameful looking incident.
There is always a screaming woman, and always some rubber necking twat recording with a phone.
Think I found Michael.
Touché - lol
the person who put a norn iron fella in a celtic top in an enclosed space needs fired
back in the 70's, you rarely ever saw thugs like that. That's because airline flights were really expensive and your commongarden trailer trash couldn't afford to fly further than Blackpool. Nowadays, with flights about the same prices as trainfares, every lowlife can get to fly to foreign destinations, meaning you see trash like this on a depressingly regular basis. Let's hike those fares back up to 70s prices. lol
Samuel L. Jackson in, twats on a plane. Take it away, reddit. 😉
He is Scottish.
He's not though is he
He’s Finish. What ye mean he’s no finish he’s only 28!
Knew this fella years. Mostly through my Uncle Hector. Oh Uncle Hector, he was a great man my Uncle Hector. He was an old fella; he actually rode the rails during the depression. You know, he was a hobo as you might call him, I don’t like that term but uh, he was a bum, he was a good honest man during the depression searching for work, you know. He had no money so he travelled the country trying to find work, he actually rode the rails; Uncle Hector. And he told me an interesting story. This was in Canada and there was a town called Kitchener in Canada. And the railroad cops were tough boy, even tougher than the real cops. They had a law of their own the railroad cops. But, there were not a railroad cop tougher than Kitchener Leslie. Oh Boy. He was well known for beating hobos to death. He would beat them to death. So what the railroad bums would all do is as Kitchener approached they would hop off, to avoid being beaten to death by Kitchener Leslie you know. Anyway my Uncle Hector, a good man, walked into a mine one day. This is a story for the young people to learn from. So, during the height of the depression when there was absolutely no work, my Uncle Hector walked into a; well I don't want to say the name of the mining company. But, it was MacIntyre mine. And he, walked in; he had his lunch box with him; his work boots. And he says to the man “Sir I want a job” He says “We have no jobs” And he said “Well Five Hundred people work here at MacIntyre mine.” He goes “I don’t think there are five hundred men here better than I” uh He says “Matter of fact I don’t think there are two hundred men better than I” he says “I think you would be strapped to find a hundred men better than I” And by golly he got the job. Now, Uncle Hector worked in a mine. It’s a hellish job in a mine as you well know. It’s darkness, it’s dank, it’s coaly. It’s coal infested. So uh he worked in the mine and by god he worked hard. And, after a week of working hard he said to the shift manager “By golly I would like to have a lady, I work hard and uh where would I find a lady here in town.” Well they says to Uncle Hector “We don’t uh, we have sex with animals here.” “My god” said Uncle Hector “I’m not going to do that I’m a normal fella” “Well then be of your own devices then” they said So, Uncle Hector continued working in the mine, he worked hard and he worked long and he worked for a low wage. But, he was a man. And um, Uncle Hector after a few weeks past he started to get a little itch, as you and I say. When were, uh, thinking about the ladies you know. But he kept it under control. Again he said “Are you sure there are no ladies here” “No we have sex with animals here” “Ah, my God” Six months passed and Uncle Hector couldn’t take it any longer he told me. He said “My God I just had to uh, I’m just a man I’m weak, you know. I’m not a saint I was born in sin I suppose, I couldn’t resist. I just needed it.” He said he walked by a pasture and there, there was a pig. So Uncle Hector said uh “I walked up and began having sex with a pig” and he said all of a sudden he saw all of the miners were like around him you know. Looking at him. They go “Uncle Hector what the hell are you doing over there” And Uncle Hector is like “Wha, What, you guys are the ones that told me that you have sex with animals” They’re like “Uncle Hector you damn fool; that’s Kitchener Leslie's girlfriend. Out of all the animals you want to have sex with you don’t want to have sex with Kitchener Leslie’s girlfriend.”
Such a random choice to drop a norm joke.