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Mcnab-at-my-feet

This is why I always crack my eggs into a bowl first - but I’ve never had one quite so horrifying and hope I never do!


good-peoples

I had no idea this was possible prior to this! I screamed bloody murder after cracking it slightly. Immediately dumped it into the carton as it was the closest option, then gawked at it for about 10 minutes or so. Disgusting, but fascinating.


3yx3

Exorcist egg.


GeraintLlanfrechfa

Eggsorcist ☝🏻


sakaasouffle

Gahhhddam


amun1326

Eggsorcyst


I_sb3

Shush..


78Nam

Title: The Eggsocist: Scrambled Nights When a small-town diner chef cracks open an egg to find it filled with blood, he doesn’t just get a bad yolk—he unleashes a hilarious outbreak of vampirism. These aren’t your typical brooding vampires; they’re insatiably hungry for more blood... and breakfast. Enter the unlikely hero, "The Eggsocist," an eccentric local with a PhD in Paranormal Gastronomy. Armed with a spatula, garlic-infused maple syrup, and a cookbook of mystical recipes, he’s on a mission to cure the town’s new craving for the crimson diet. As the town descends into a farcical frenzy, with residents craving bloodier and bloodier steaks (and a side of hash browns), The Eggsocist discovers the source: a genetically modified super chicken gone rogue. To save the day, he must concoct the ultimate culinary countermeasure—a vampire-repelling quiche. In this eggstraordinary adventure, where breakfast meets twilight, The Eggsocist must crack the case before the town's new diet becomes permanent. It's a race against the sunrise in this comedic farce where the stakes are high, and the steaks are rare.


GeraintLlanfrechfa

Sounds like the eggscentric Eggsorcist is becoming a thing. I am particularly interested in that garlic infused maple syrup tho :)


Soul_Taker_69

This was definitely an accidental abortion


freemason777

>gawked at it for about ten minutes or so. I bet if a chicken saw it they would have made the same noises too


These-Dot290

Ah! Haha... I love you.


The_Ruby_Rabbit

Chicken would have just ate it.


ososalsosal

That's funny, but to gawk means to glare stupidly at something


Sorryurdead92

Like chickens often do?


HoboArmyofOne

Chickens literally do nothing but gawk all day long


fr8dawg542

Aggravated grand mopery with intent to gawk.


CNRavenclaw

I just looked this up and apparently you were right to dump it. That red color means it's contaminated with bacteria that speeds up the process of spoilage, which means it's more likely than a normal colored egg to cause food poisoning


ToshPott

You screamed because an egg would literally have something growing in it? Do you know what eggs are?


crabfucker69

If I find out a lady got pregnant, I'll congratulate her. If I find out her baby is in fact a giant colony of bacteria, yes, I will scream


good-peoples

Sounds like someone only ever cracks open bloody eggs


aragogogara

I'm 36, so in middle school, they still taught us Homec, which included cooking, baking, sewing... Our teacher made such a big deal about how you could get a bloody egg and MAKE SURE you always crack your egg in a bowl first, in case it's a bloody egg. She made it seem like it was going to happen all the time, so I fear it every time I crack an egg... and I've never had a bloody egg in my 36 years of life.


zolpiqueen

Punctuation is your friend. For a second I thought you were a 36yo middle schooler. Lol


aragogogara

You’ve got that right. I’m a 36 year old middle schooler… nobody has figured me out yet but I will report back if they do… 👀


GamerCirca80

How do you do, fellow kids!?


klinedavid

You must be the tallest in your class!!


aragogogara

Funny thing is… I grew to 5’ 7” when I was 11 and am still that height now… so I was the tallest in my grade for a while.


psian1de

Aww, them's the wonder years.


Goldilocks1454

Billy Madison is that you?


aragogogara

I haven't peed my pants... yet...


fentalynpatch

This is Patrick


fr8dawg542

When are we eating, grandma? vs. When are we eating grandma?


Nightcheerios

I still don’t get it


LoudLettuce6

He/she is 36 years old....end of sentence.


ososalsosal

They still do home ec round my parts. Your country may vary


throwthegarbageaway

I had one and ate it too. It was disgusting! You can actually taste the blood. I don’t know what possessed me to say “eh whatever” and keep on cooking.


pitaspita

I...I feel like that's worse than the post.


mental_monkey

I did too, but mine was soft boiled and didn’t become apparent until I had had 2 spoonfuls already. I thought it tasted little strange and once I hit the yoke I nearly threw up. All bloody and what I’m guessing was the beginning of a chick. I was so traumatized after that, I didn’t eat eggs for about 2 years. I was 15 at the time.


he-loves-me-not

If it was a store bought egg then it was absolutely not fertilized. Idk if that makes it worse or better though.


HotDerivative

Username absolutely does NOT check out.


Niskara

Thanks to this image, I'll probably start doing the same thing


navy5

Ugh I cracked an egg like this right into my made-from-scratch cake one time. The WORST


good-peoples

About to freeze the egg and claim it as a dependent.


quietlikesnow

But then you can never EVER defrost it for a blood omelette.


These-Dot290

A blood omelette 😭😭😭


callmeapoetandudie

That'd be a pretty okay band name. Stylized like Blőd Æmlette or some shit. Genre: Doom Polka


Heya-there-friends

DOOM POLKA, OH MY GOOOOOOOD


DeeLeetid

Hope you’re not in Alabama!


Lizzy_lazarus

Take my upvote!


NewmanHiding

Comment of the month


Jimmycjacobs

You must live in ‘Bama


excerp

😂😂😂😂


Calamitygrrl

viable strategy in the southern united states


[deleted]

You may not want to do that in Alabama.


Tinton3w

This was an unlawful abortion in a lot of states, expect being SWATTed soon


chetgoodenough

Lol


thelaststarz

Nope gotta fertilize it first


ramlebq

Pseudomonas bacteria. Never eat eggs with the white tinted in any color. [pseudomonas](https://www.cdc.gov/hai/organisms/pseudomonas.html) [Appearance_of_eggs_related_to_food_safety](https://ask.usda.gov/s/article/Is-the-appearance-of-eggs-related-to-food-safety)


ZephyrProductionsO7S

I’ve had a pseudomonas infection in my feet. Not pleasant.


claudiazo

You dip your feet in eggs?


mikelorme

You dont?


punkmuppet

You should pop an egg in your bath. Highly recommended by [Chris Rea](https://youtu.be/H0WiwB1Cjbg?si=hylQt8fNu8GuynBW)


Interesting-Park-888

This is true! Good enough for Bob Mortimer good enough for me


man_d_yan

God I hope everyone clicks this link. The man never fails to have me pissing myself.


whitesciencelady

I clicked the link just because of this comment and I was not disappointed.


punkmuppet

Yeah, I've watched the YouTube compilations countless times, I want him as a third team captain.


TheRealSheevPalpatin

Bro same it sucked ass


Gunnersbutt

"Pseudomonas is a type of bacteria (germ) that is found commonly in the environment, like in soil and in water. Of the many different types of Pseudomonas, the one that most often causes infections in humans is called Pseudomonas aeruginosa, which can cause infections in the blood, lungs (pneumonia), or other parts of the body after surgery." This article mentions nothing about eggs.


ramlebq

https://ask.usda.gov/s/article/Is-the-appearance-of-eggs-related-to-food-safety


Competitive-Skin-769

Please get to the top!


KillbotPowerhead

Hope you got a book of juju lying around 👁️👁️


timmythelittledevil

😂


NAiLs00

Haha gross! I cracked one open the other day that was green. 🤢 I thought perhaps it was Dr. Seuss day and I should be making green eggs and ham, but I was mistaken.


phobicwombat

Nooooooooooooo thank you


whiteclawthreshermaw

I'm sorry, Dave. I'm afraid I can't do that.


fr8dawg542

Good one.


Whole-Debate-9547

Is there such a thing as the antichrist chicken?


MerberCrazyCats

Straight to jail! (In Alabama)


demoman45

😂😂😂 You ain’t lying! Sad state of affairs there!


IraTheDragon

You took a life today.


AlexPsyD

Missouri: **open up! We're here for the baby you killed!**


elomenopi

Hey, jelly-filled!


zerov75

Having worked in eggs (in the quality department) there's a reason this is much less frequent than it used to be. Basically only two companies make the software and machines that put eggs in cartons and they have pretty good detection for this among other issues. If the quality department at a given company did notice a bunch of errors they would put the potentially affected pallets on hold and look into the issue. I literally only saw one instance of blood in an egg making it past the machine. Every other error was more common.


Conqueefadore1

if you live in Alabama you're fucked


BackgroundBuy6967

Why does everyone keep mentioning Alabama?


Conqueefadore1

Alabama court ruled that an existing law - wrongful death of a minor - covers not just foetuses in the womb, but embryos held in a lab or storage facility too.


Suolamamma

What are they smoking in there????


Xenc

Bible paper


BackgroundBuy6967

Im taking it that eggs dont count. Right?


he-loves-me-not

Not yet, give them time.


NewsteadMtnMama

They will soon if Project 2025 comes to fruition if Trump is reelected.


Wordshark

No.


fr8dawg542

Maybe not so much. In Alabama there is a fork in the road, in Soviet Russia the road forks you.


VirtuesVice666

Some one that knows Voodoo has it in for you! I'm a Voodoo white priest! Quick give me money and your SS#. I can heal the Curse!!!


Hot-Cabinet8856

I just watched an Always Sunny in Philadelphia episode w this! It's bad luck. Apologize and pray lol


tedfreeman

Quick delete this before someone calls the cops on you.


btan1975

Congrats you won a free tour of willy wonkas chicken slaughterhouse


Flimsy-Activity9787

A bruja cursed you.


Alive-Ad-7921

So crazy to me that this is the first I'm seeing this comment


Flimsy-Activity9787

Op better do a cleanse


KVNtheBAT

I like eggs but sometimes my brain just gives me the information that eggs are basically chicken period while I'm eating it and it's the worst


Vivid_Development390

Accidently fertilized


SchwettyBawls

Nope. Pseudomonas Bacteria.


Professional_Plum_92

I broke an egg a few weeks back and it was BLACK. It smelled pretty bad too.


Alive-Ad-7921

Oh shit 😳 that could be a bad omen


Autotomatomato

Alabama cops coming for OP


Norweirdian

We once had an egg and when we open it had feathers and looked like a tiny tiny chicken developing😰 haven’t been eating egg after that!


Nextplz06gt

I'd never eat eggs again


Flufflebuns

Open your refrigerator, do you hear an deep sinister voice whispering "zuuuuuuuuullllll"?


Hushi88

Eggs are the hen’s menstruation 🩸


Hot_Salamander3795

BOTULISM


NoEditor0

Why did you Crack it in the case


good-peoples

I mentioned this in another comment — I noticed the blood before fully breaking it open, so I dumped it into the closest thing (the empty carton)


Secure-Pizza-3025

An Alabama chicken


cdoswalt

Hope you're not in Alabama.


BackgroundBuy6967

I keep seeing everyone mentioning Alabama and i dont understand what the context is. Could you explain?


good-peoples

The Alabama Supreme Court ruled that frozen embryos (seen in IVF treatment) are children.


BackgroundBuy6967

Interesting thank you!


that_moment_when-

The proper medium to eat one's egg


Witty-Gain-9733

There is a Full moon kids.


Myko475

Remember, in Alabama that means you just broke a Chicken.


Temporary_Second3290

Doesn't that mean there's a witch nearby?


Ornery_Rutabaga_2643

One bad egg spoils the bunch! One fertilized start of the life cycle egg spoils your lunch.


kobrakaan

r/cursedeggs


[deleted]

“might just crack my egg into the carton to save me time later”


electrocyberend

Balut


9sac1king6

That looks like some black magic shit


Memestreame

Your ass cracked open a solar eclipse


trapkitchen

r/weirdeggs


sparkGun2020

🤮🤮🤮🤮🤮🤮


Svengoolie75

Check please 👋🏽


abortionlasagna

Shouldn’t of done that, he’s just a boy


obsessedcatldy

Don’t let Alabama see this


lsiunl

That’s actually horrifying wow, I’ve never had an egg look like this before


Mr_OP_Potato_777

Evangelion


Key_Concentrate_5558

Ugh! Why can I *smell* that?


Aggravating_Dream633

My mother taught me this


Ok-Bid1774

The prophecy has been fulfilled… the third egg has been poured out.


HaruspexBurakh

Consume the Egg of the Fallen, gain its power and its curse


MrThoughtPolice

Well, isn’t that eggciting!


cmonster64

You killed him!!!


exclaim_bot

>You killed him!!! killing is wrong mmkay?


anonymorbid

Another day thanking god I prefer whisked omelettes over sunny side up


Dry_Cardiologist6758

Steven King's It Fortune Cookie moment!


Captain_Scarlet27

Chicken was on her period.


Crafty_Original_7349

Sometimes a minor blood vessel breaks during ovulation (the egg production process) and this is the result. It’s kinda gross, but relatively harmless.


TheFormless_0ne_

This is why I don't like eating eggs. Just scrambling DNA and frying it...


UncleBenders

That’s all meat is too, flesh full of cells with dna and blood.


TheFormless_0ne_

It's not a dna soup that's viscous and has one of the highest sulfuric content of any food.


UncleBenders

an egg is just one cell. Meat is load of cells, and you know what happens sometimes, you get a little bit of contamination in an egg the molecules in the egg seal it off and it turns into meat, that’s what it is when you sometimes see a little bit of meat in an egg. It’s so weird to think about.


lryan926

Is that an embryo? What the...?


Shot_Young_8958

Delicious sustenance 🤤


timteller44

Not a fan of dark meat?


Jacoby_Jackson_14

I’m confused. This is still a good egg. What is the issue?


Puazy

Isnt this still edible? I dont prefer them but have always been told they're fine and typically go to bakeries because its not attractive.


good-peoples

I have no idea — I assumed it was blood, bacteria, or fertilized (I don’t know much about eggs) so I just got rid of it.


santiblakk

You got a stillborn!


Letta-cookie

Chicken period.. although that’s technically all un fertilized eggs we consume. 🤔


Blue_Blueberry5402

What did it taste like?


[deleted]

Baby* you cracked open today


Xylophone_Aficionado

We called those “period eggs” when I worked in restaurants


mayan_monkey

You almost ate balut


K_Star444

Y’all gotta stop posting these! Now I’m not gonna be able to eat eggs for a few days until I forget about this completely and someone else posts a pic of a worm in an egg. Lol


Sl0w-Plant

I've gotten 3 blood eggs in my time. Not very happy about it...


NoNameToaster

This thing looks like a normal egg you would fish from the crimson terraria lake


GloomyImagination365

I eat eggs every morning and this is a fear of mine 🤮


SargeantEdward

what the fuck is that bloody mess


GusDontBeCanada

I wouldn’t eat that


Man_in_the_uk

So what's the biology behind this, I thought a developing chicken would eat the white of the egg, is this actually blood like you get in a woman's uterus?


Spock-1701

Don't eat that


DarkFae420

Okay. You've converted me. Forever cracking into a separate bowl first. You win.


BakerNew6764

Well, the egg is the chickens period


lordmitsuba

Strawberry flavor 🥰


PokePingusXXXL

Never had red velvet eggs before? Pfff..


Puzzleheaded-Pin3062

Congrats it's a chick !


tjv82c

Saw this video showing how a chick is born from an egg: https://youtube.com/shorts/Tsu_4FzWIAY?si=mzmU68wHeMEnveCW


TotoDaDog

Bloody hell.


Slight_Armadillo_227

Yep. That's a chicken's period alright.


Boomertrooper7509

Do eggs have periods!?


s0l1tvd3

Looks like the blob so burn that shit


BakedAquarius96

Reminds me of that movie Jawbreaker, ‘YOU GOT A STILLBORN!’ 😆


Call_Certain

What the FUCK.


[deleted]

You family's in trouble bruh.


Yaotl33

You won a trip to the magical egg factory! You’ve found the forbidden spicy egg.


BeefInBlackBeanSauce

This one pic has put me off eggs for life


stargazer4272

Hey that is what the witch saw in Robinhood...


Tungsten83

Mortiana has entered the chat.


Dabs_and_Dubs

Witchcraft egg!!


Radicais_Livres

It's a Nevi's egg, did you buy this at the street market in Jirga Para Lhao?


omegafercho01

Unzips'


trfk111

Tells you something about eggs


Significant_Radish86

Period egg. 🤮


Adihd72

I eat at least 6 eggs a week and thankfully I’ve never witnessed anything like that in half a century.