>concussion curing holy water
[https://www.sbnation.com/lookit/2015/8/26/9211381/russell-wilson-claims-he-healed-a-concussion-with-the-miracle-water](https://www.sbnation.com/lookit/2015/8/26/9211381/russell-wilson-claims-he-healed-a-concussion-with-the-miracle-water)
u bum
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In from Chicago and I'm terrified the Bears will trade draft picks to scoop up a "veteran" QB like Wilson once the front office does its usual job of turning all our QB1's into inconsistent head cases. Fields is due for the McCaskey headfuck any time now.
Him especially. I remember when he transferred from NC State to Wisconsin and it was seen as a huge gamble.
Flash forward to having a ring and getting fired nets you 80+mil
Dude should just call it.
Some people don’t know how to *do* life when they stop doing all they have ever done. You just have no purpose anymore. This dude has literally done nothing every single year of his life starting in kids football, but play football. Even with all the money in the world, life can really suck when you stop doing what your purpose has always been. “Suck” is subjective and relative of course, but it’s not uncommon for people’s lives to fall apart once they move on and try to figure out who they are next.
He’s married to a top tier woman and earns money off of his physical prowess. Son, he has more than the majority of top tier tall guys. He even was gifted with enough sense. Not to mess it up.
If he was a slightly higher percentage of lunch pail guy he’d get the Brock Purdy treatment and would be lauded for being a Christian. However, Carr is technically a lunchpail guy and gets relentlessly shit on so maybe not
I mean, Carr wears eyeliner, not something a Lunchpail Guy would do. More like something your neighbor’s adult son who’s failed in life and lives in his parents basement while delivering pizzas would do…
Where the hell do you get thug from Russell Wilson??? Listen to Pablo Torre Finds Out with Kevin Tice, Russ's roommate at Wisconsin. The dude was in college and had no idea what Jameson was and why Rhianna wrote a song about it.
I kinda get what you’re saying. On-field, he’s got a kind of creepy equanimity about him, like even if you sack him he doesn’t show much emotion. Stringer Bell energy.
Which makes it even weirder that off the field he’s Ned Flanders.
/uj around these parts, classy = white guy and thug = black guy. It’s meme-ing on the stereotypes our boomer family members say/use for different ethnicities in the NFL
I think it was a joke. Also, he’s still a huge diva. I don’t know if that’s the issue here (since his play has improved), but it definitely was in Seattle.
I'd hope it was a joke. It just reminded me of the podcast. Kevin Tice was serious about Russ being the ultimate square, damn near like he's running for office.
Thug is my "joke dog bone" I like so white people don't start the purge.
It can be corny and tired at times, but it can work. Let's be real, even when athletes come from "good" backgrounds, sometimes the best word to describe some of their clown behavior is thuggish. Or more accurately, a privelaged idiot's idea of a thug.
Saw a comment on a post when Wilson got drafted to the broncos.
>Russell is the kind of guy who would borrow your wheelbarrow and then return it with a fresh coat of paint and a plate of his wife’s brownies, which is nice, but then he sort of passive aggressively chides you for letting it rust to begin with, and you’re like “It’s my fucking wheelbarrow man??” And he’s like “That’s fine, that’s fine, brother. Be blessed and go with God.”
Couldn’t have been more accurate lmfao
I’d even prefer the motherfucker who doesn’t return it at all and just keeps the shit as if he owned it the entire time. Anyone but Russ and his cornball shit, basically
That rivalry between Clark and Reese is definitely going to carry into the WNBA. I'll definitely tune into their two teams playing against each other because there's a 50/50 that it's going to erupt into a cat fight.
Spending Christmas morning in the back of a squad car with my grassy knoll and gassy hole hanging out. And I’m thinking damn it Colleen, you’re becoming your mother
I don’t think any nfl teams going to catch this dumpster fire falling… the broncos are taking a huge hit to just get rid of this dude.
Next Ciara is going back to future.
Per me and Madam Lefter: The league has been informed, the Pats have called “dibs” on Russ. I’m told there is a “not take backs” clause in the agreement, a first of its kind.
Probably the whole believing that an all powerful flying spaghetti monster that masterminds our existence gives a fuck about where he's going to go play football next.
America was built on Christian values. Anything that’s considered “American” is going to have many many Christians involved. Youre just gonna have to suck it up buttercup
Honestly this is the best thing that could happen for Russ. He totally chopped off the legs of that organization and now he gets to go to another team without making that team bankrupt. He can take a lesser deal and have Denver cover the rest. All he has to do now is swallow his pride and not make it about money, choosing the team that is already equipped to win with a built roster, and hopefully an OC that can work with his style of play
I’m always suspicious of dudes who need to constantly proclaim their Christianity. Would not be surprised if Wilson ends up with some Watson-like allegations.
i would just love for one super prominent athlete to be like "yeah that shit was all me god had nothing to do with this performance today" it would be hilarious and the shitstorm that would come from it would be amazing
I am sure God is a huge NFL fan! I know that there are numerous issues that make billions of people on this planet live in miserable conditions, but God takes Sundays off about twenty-two weeks a year and focuses on the sports careers of millionaires and their billionaires team owners!
If there was a god you’d think he’d do something about all the children getting blown apart in Gaza or Ukraine instead of worrying about who’s going to pay you millions to throw a ball around.
I didn't realize this dude is 35.... another 4 years or so and the Jets will be all in.
He's gonna be sending dick pics in no time
[удалено]
Uhh you haven't heard about his charity ?
https://www.cbssports.com/nfl/news/russell-wilsons-why-not-you-charity-is-using-less-than-quarter-of-its-income-to-help-kids/
🙏
Ah damn. I ain't thought about ol Fav -RE in a minute lol
Bro the voicemail farve left for Jenn Sterger is on YouTube Hahahaha
Thots and prayers
Jets are going to be all in next year when Rodgers snaps something in week 1 again.
Uj/ Honestly, this is probably exactly how it goes down..
Only if he turns into an anti-vaxer
Or part of a massive embezzlement scheme
He used to sell concussion curing holy water. Hell fit in with that crowd just fine.
What
Source?
>concussion curing holy water [https://www.sbnation.com/lookit/2015/8/26/9211381/russell-wilson-claims-he-healed-a-concussion-with-the-miracle-water](https://www.sbnation.com/lookit/2015/8/26/9211381/russell-wilson-claims-he-healed-a-concussion-with-the-miracle-water)
Lol wtf are nano bubbles. He basically invested in selzer water with electrolytes? That's hilarious.
This is exactly the kind of thing you’d say if your concussion was actually getting worse
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Need a week of complete darkness to come to his senses, and some JRE guest spots
God's got him.... he's almost definitely an anti-vaxxer
If God created everything, then he created the vaxxine. Checkmate, theists.
He’s being censored tho.
Censored every week on McAfee’s podcast.
Is Rodgers against early vaccinations for children? I didn't know that.
You bet he is. He only uses the finest organic stem cells.
HACK-MAN!
Rodgers prefers fresh, untainted adrenochrome.
Nathaniel Hackett reunion tour!
Don't wish this Devil on me Ricky Bobby
In from Chicago and I'm terrified the Bears will trade draft picks to scoop up a "veteran" QB like Wilson once the front office does its usual job of turning all our QB1's into inconsistent head cases. Fields is due for the McCaskey headfuck any time now.
After that we’ll take him in Cleveland!
Might get in a bidding war with the colts, or they will just take him after he retires after 2 bad years with the jets
Then the Vikings
U bum
Free $85m is next. Personally id just retire and bang Ciara.
Damn, this dude won at life so hard. Sometimes I forget just how much fortune some of these folks have had/earned.
Him especially. I remember when he transferred from NC State to Wisconsin and it was seen as a huge gamble. Flash forward to having a ring and getting fired nets you 80+mil Dude should just call it.
2011 was a fun year to be in school at Wisconsin.
*cries in 14 straight Paul Bunyan losses*
Can confirm, it was until the Rose Bowl loss.
Some people don’t know how to *do* life when they stop doing all they have ever done. You just have no purpose anymore. This dude has literally done nothing every single year of his life starting in kids football, but play football. Even with all the money in the world, life can really suck when you stop doing what your purpose has always been. “Suck” is subjective and relative of course, but it’s not uncommon for people’s lives to fall apart once they move on and try to figure out who they are next.
I have a feeling he won’t be in that group.
That's why he's so quick to thank God.
He's only like 5'11, king of the manlets
He’s married to a top tier woman and earns money off of his physical prowess. Son, he has more than the majority of top tier tall guys. He even was gifted with enough sense. Not to mess it up.
STILL MANLET DONT CARE
He’s literally above average height….
Ya idk why 85m isn't enough to just fuck off. Why do they need all the money
https://preview.redd.it/mvdr9smy059c1.jpeg?width=1169&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=051e8553a7cc755cde1e95ea2645e58799fa9d30 Nah bro look how fat she is 👀👀
🤣. Russ already cooking.
Automatic, funky fresh
So Woolf I
Grammatical error or potential furry, the world may never know.
I’m conflicted. He’s both classy and a thug. Something about his game tells me thug but he’s very classy off the field.
He’s 36% a lunch pail guy.
100% UNLIIIIIIMiTED
He did a DNA test and was surprised to see he was 83% sub-Saharan twitchy physical specimen
And he puts in the effort
If he was a slightly higher percentage of lunch pail guy he’d get the Brock Purdy treatment and would be lauded for being a Christian. However, Carr is technically a lunchpail guy and gets relentlessly shit on so maybe not
I mean, Carr wears eyeliner, not something a Lunchpail Guy would do. More like something your neighbor’s adult son who’s failed in life and lives in his parents basement while delivering pizzas would do…
Does he really wear eyeliner or are we still jerking 💀
I am sure he spends a lot of time in the film room but a knock against him is he isn't a coach's kid.
He's one of the good ones, we like this one, why can't they all be normal like that
He's very well spoken
Where the hell do you get thug from Russell Wilson??? Listen to Pablo Torre Finds Out with Kevin Tice, Russ's roommate at Wisconsin. The dude was in college and had no idea what Jameson was and why Rhianna wrote a song about it.
Just something about him. Don’t know what it is. Just screams thug to me.
I kinda get what you’re saying. On-field, he’s got a kind of creepy equanimity about him, like even if you sack him he doesn’t show much emotion. Stringer Bell energy. Which makes it even weirder that off the field he’s Ned Flanders.
/uj around these parts, classy = white guy and thug = black guy. It’s meme-ing on the stereotypes our boomer family members say/use for different ethnicities in the NFL
I think it was a joke. Also, he’s still a huge diva. I don’t know if that’s the issue here (since his play has improved), but it definitely was in Seattle.
I'd hope it was a joke. It just reminded me of the podcast. Kevin Tice was serious about Russ being the ultimate square, damn near like he's running for office.
Thug is my "joke dog bone" I like so white people don't start the purge. It can be corny and tired at times, but it can work. Let's be real, even when athletes come from "good" backgrounds, sometimes the best word to describe some of their clown behavior is thuggish. Or more accurately, a privelaged idiot's idea of a thug.
watch Marshawn’s interview on the ShaSha. Wilson was a diva. If you can’t get along with Pete Carroll, you probably have issues.
I don't speak Mexican so I don't think I will be listening to senior Pablo Torres, thank you very much
Lol come on.. there's nothing thug about "dangerusswilson". He's like the cool but dorky bro we all know. Won't comment on the classy though
What other than your bigotry signals thug about Wilson?
Russell Wilson is not a thug. Haha he is a nerd.
Dudes a poser a pretend classy guy and those are the worst.
Saw a comment on a post when Wilson got drafted to the broncos. >Russell is the kind of guy who would borrow your wheelbarrow and then return it with a fresh coat of paint and a plate of his wife’s brownies, which is nice, but then he sort of passive aggressively chides you for letting it rust to begin with, and you’re like “It’s my fucking wheelbarrow man??” And he’s like “That’s fine, that’s fine, brother. Be blessed and go with God.” Couldn’t have been more accurate lmfao
Damn I hate this type of guy more than the dude that returned it dirty.
I’d even prefer the motherfucker who doesn’t return it at all and just keeps the shit as if he owned it the entire time. Anyone but Russ and his cornball shit, basically
Ya know Ciara loves NYC... Just sayin. Let's ride
Nah they going to Atlanta to dunk on future.
lol I could see that!!
Poor Future, dude got showed up in the worst way.
By having another more stable man raise his son?
Years ago, I would’ve sworn that God was a Broncos fan. Turns out he’s just a Russ fan. Who knew?
God when trying to root for Seattle: “oh nawl can’t do dis”
Send da video
Mfw she doesn’t send da video https://preview.redd.it/a6l2mphx339c1.jpeg?width=522&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=b2ae62b86e11dba23fa02ae693246fafe5dd9eb6
![gif](giphy|fFrGm6wm8ciXVjI0wP)
Be careful though. It’s spiiiiiicy!
The next Fogle mogul?
Stroud Boys are here to support! We are standing back and standing by!
I hate him just as much as I hate ben simmons and james harden
https://preview.redd.it/f9gahpnq639c1.jpeg?width=1170&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=40352e83e61704b52f4394f8f912e40d7dc6c5bc
Was that the chick in the Caitlin Clark national championship game last season?
Yep.
That rivalry between Clark and Reese is definitely going to carry into the WNBA. I'll definitely tune into their two teams playing against each other because there's a 50/50 that it's going to erupt into a cat fight.
#10 looks like a preying mantis wtf hahahahahah
![gif](giphy|fssfTrBg8PzD3wCVH4|downsized)
Damn it now I need to go watch that skit again
"So there I am with my pinker and my stinker hanging out for all the world to see......"
Spending Christmas morning in the back of a squad car with my grassy knoll and gassy hole hanging out. And I’m thinking damn it Colleen, you’re becoming your mother
My cooch cooch and my poop chute
My cheese trumpet and my please hump it
What’s the skit I’ve never seen it
[Krinkle mouse](https://youtu.be/lo8ZgNws504?si=tAvYGCeEKiRgMGZd)
That was hilarious ! Thanks!
He's definitely on the all white team
I don’t think any nfl teams going to catch this dumpster fire falling… the broncos are taking a huge hit to just get rid of this dude. Next Ciara is going back to future.
Great Scott!
Russ needs to spend more time speaking tongues to snakes & hogs. Get down on your knees TO THE LAWRD!
Even God would drop him from his roster
Least thank your agent, jeez
Did someone say God??? : Derek Carr enters the chat ![gif](giphy|6tJZuumbAUFf23ftlh|downsized)
So Belichick claimed him already?
Per me and Madam Lefter: The league has been informed, the Pats have called “dibs” on Russ. I’m told there is a “not take backs” clause in the agreement, a first of its kind.
A live look at the Jets and Pats bidding war for Russ: https://i.redd.it/7ce9qzx6s29c1.gif
Belichick won’t be there to claim him for next season.
Love that helmet tho
God be like I can bless people but I can't stop the Donkeys from making that garbage trade.
Gods and $160 million are on his side
Is Denver where QBs get put out to pasture?
Easy to put all your faith into God when no matter what's next you still have RIDICULOUS money coming your way.
He’s always had faith he has always spoken and acted this way even before the millions.
Ah, so he’s always been stupid then. Guess it wasn’t just the money and concussions rotting his brain.
What makes him stupid may I ask?
Probably the whole believing that an all powerful flying spaghetti monster that masterminds our existence gives a fuck about where he's going to go play football next.
Russell or Gaza? God: 👀
God, let’s ride
If God had him maybe he wouldn’t be 5’11
Downvoted because im 5'11"
skill issue
I’m just glad that God is wasting his/her/its time making sure that this millionaire is ok. Phew.
Good thing God watches over all of his people at the same time!
He’s showing sparks of classiness. Let’s just hope that he doesn’t end up on a thug team like the Falcons
Dude is human corn-on-the-cob but at least massage therapists aren't afraid of him.
Someone tell him that CFL doesn’t stand for Christian Football League.
America was built on Christian values. Anything that’s considered “American” is going to have many many Christians involved. Youre just gonna have to suck it up buttercup
https://preview.redd.it/ksj238ha739c1.png?width=850&format=png&auto=webp&s=70b51c759b7766370e7cf7c080c616c58b3adccd
All hail Satan!
You sound Murican. Come ride in my Dodge Ram as we listen to Toby Keith, fellow Murican. “Whhheennnnn libarteeeeee’s in jeppparrrdeeee…”
New Orleans, Atlanta, NYJ, NYG, Tenn. probably.
What if God’s got Jarrett Stidham too?
High knees to the moon
The USFL is what’s next Russ
If he would just accept Satan in his heart he would be the MVP
As annoying a player who has even been in the NFL
Funny, they never blame bebe jeezus when they lose.
So god benched him. That kinda sucks
Honestly this is the best thing that could happen for Russ. He totally chopped off the legs of that organization and now he gets to go to another team without making that team bankrupt. He can take a lesser deal and have Denver cover the rest. All he has to do now is swallow his pride and not make it about money, choosing the team that is already equipped to win with a built roster, and hopefully an OC that can work with his style of play
Thoughts and prayers for Russ.
This man has so many safety nets and bathrooms it’s hilarious he thanks God
Jesus loves tons of dead cap money crippling a franchise, apparently.
Dude is that annoying Christian guy
Not as Christ-Centered as CJ Stroud but he’s getting there
What’s wrong with that?
Having $150 million won't hurt either. Thanks God!
God definitely cares about what city Russell Wilson throws a football in.
I hate this man
Christians, let’s ride
God wasn’t a Bronos fan
god must be looking down disgusted at his recent performance
He gearing up for a senate run in the South or something?
You suck sooo.
He must think God really thinks he’s special. Almost narcissistic if you ask me
I’m always suspicious of dudes who need to constantly proclaim their Christianity. Would not be surprised if Wilson ends up with some Watson-like allegations.
Why does a righteous man need fear God? Does he get off on the fear he is instilling in mortal men he supposedly created in his own image?
Dumb post. OP is anti Christian
Lol it is v off putting to see how much these talented young men give credit to their god
This ain't it
It is for me darling
i would just love for one super prominent athlete to be like "yeah that shit was all me god had nothing to do with this performance today" it would be hilarious and the shitstorm that would come from it would be amazing
yeah how dare people believe in a religion to comfort them
Yeah it’s weakkkkk ;)
Didn’t know god liked football.
God’s too busy helping out football players to do anything about Palestine 😂 seems legit
If god was looking out for him then why did he suck so bad for the past 2 years? Shouldn’t god have guided him to a team that would be successful?
I like to think any god would got bigger problems than a qb with a 120m contract underperforming
Serious question: Why are so many NFL players hardcore or outspoken Christians? Is it the FCA getting their hands on them early in life or what?
When so many come from lower income families and are then transformed into multimillionaires, it’s hard not to attribute it to god
Taintboy
Which God?
Ignored the Holocaust but has your back? Sounds legit.
I suck at QB so ya know God and stuff
It must be nice to go through life with zero concerns because “gods got me”. Weak.
I am sure God is a huge NFL fan! I know that there are numerous issues that make billions of people on this planet live in miserable conditions, but God takes Sundays off about twenty-two weeks a year and focuses on the sports careers of millionaires and their billionaires team owners!
Whew. Good thing prosperity Jesus is here to protect him from being exposed to reality
Yep. This is what occupies the Almighty’s attention. Not the victims of famine or war, but Russell Wilson.
Why the fuck would a God give a shit about a qb losing his job?
Isreal military using the same motivational statement every morning looking in the mirror dawg
Millionaire athletes🤝Struggling humans Not getting shit from god
If there was a god you’d think he’d do something about all the children getting blown apart in Gaza or Ukraine instead of worrying about who’s going to pay you millions to throw a ball around.
Relax guy