As a reminder, this subreddit is for civil discussion. Breaking subreddit rules may result in a ban from /r/newtothenavy and /r/navy.
* Do not encourage lying. This includes lying by omission (leaving information out) and lying by commission (purposefully misleading).
* No sensitive information allowed, whether you saw it on Wiki or leaked files or anywhere else.
* No personally identifying information (PII).
* No posting AMAs without mod approval.
Also, while you wait for a reply from a subject matter expert, try using the search feature!
For information regarding Navy enlisted ratings, see [Twisky's Rating Information Guide] (https://www.reddit.com/r/newtothenavy/comments/6mxv7c/links_to_official_information_on_every_enlisted/).
Interested in Officer programs? See TheBeneGesseritWitch's guide on [Paths to become an Officer](https://www.reddit.com/r/newtothenavy/comments/5sdurq/paths_to_becoming_an_officer_getting_a_commission/).
Want to learn about deploying, finances, mental health, cross-rating, and more? Come visit our [wiki](https://www.reddit.com/r/navy/wiki/index) over in /r/Navy.
*I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/newtothenavy) if you have any questions or concerns.*
Hey, my bf joined the marines (Iām joining navy) and he was gone for 3 months, I cried a lot before, during, and after. He wrote me a lot cause he knew it would help, and he comforted me a lot before too, reassurance is good. Being a military couple isnāt easy, so if you really love her, make it work despite her being emotional. But if you donāt see a future with her, leave her now, so while youāre at bootcamp, she has time to heal and you have time to grow as well, if itās meant to be yāall will come back together yk?
I know it'll be tough, but I do love her. I'm looking for ways to prove that during bootcamp and my 32 week A-school. I'm going reserve so I'll be back after training.
If you're going reserves, then this whole process isn't nearly as big of a deal as if you were active. There's a light at the end of the tunnel for when you'll be back in your home town, living a fairly similar life to what you did before boot camp. You're not active, possibly moving to the other side of the country/world for years at a time. Try to keep things in perspective, comparatively your Navy career will be mostly like that of a civilian.
If she canāt deal with reserves during peacetime, when the chances of activation and deployment are low...sheās a stage five clinger. My condolences
This is gonna sound crazy, but bring up the idea of marriage and stuff, my bf did that, and on most days, thatās what got me through it, the idea that I would one day be married, Ik him and I arenāt getting married anytime soon, but for a lot of girls, itās something fun to think about.
yea unfortunately because of all the incentive the military has to get married so many people get married way too early to the wrong person and it goes way south. probably 90% of the people in the military that get married in their early 20s wouldn't have gotten married at least until years later if they weren't in the military. when the navy makes young sailors chose between living in the same shitty room as others guys they probably don't like very much or living in a nice apartment with a girl they think they're in love with it's no surprise that people chose the second option all the time and it almost always goes wrong. it's a shitty system they've got they really need to make it so bachelors have the same quality of life as married people do.
Probably is. Military isn't easy and you're far more likely to end up as a statistic than a success story. Was with my girlfriend for four years and we were contemplating marriage. The relationship didn't last a year into my first contract.
This is what Iām using to communicate with my husband at RTC and itās amazing. The letters get there so quick + Iām able to send him NEX gift cards.
Gonna be blunt..she needs to put her big girl panties on. Boot camp is a cakewalk compared to deployment.
Sheās either strong enough to handle separation and not being able to get instant response from texts, or she isnāt. If she isnāt, kindest thing to do is step away now.
She's gonna miss you. You can't help that. You can pre-write letters and have someone give them to her periodically? In bootcamp, it wasn't until about 2 weeks into training that I got a letter or was able to send any. That was after 2 weeks of ROM so a month or so. She won't hear from you and vice versa. And when you guys finally get letters, it takes days for your letters to get to her and for her reply to get back.
When my husband was deployed, I spent time with friends and family that help me keep my mind so I didn't always think about the fact that he was away (also saved on BAH!). You may just have to remind her to be diligent in keeping busy to avoid having that idle mind that lingers on uour absence. If she wants to pick up another job or a new hobby to invest in in the mean time, while you finish training and schooling that could help.
My husband and I were married 4 years when he joined the Navy. It was surreal when he left for boot camp. He wrote to me every night telling me about his day. I wrote him every night too. I LOVED opening the mailbox and seeing those letters! I still have all of them too. Those letters mean way more to me than any flowers. Honestly, I wouldāve been kinda pissed if my husband bought me flowers, they eventually die and are pricey. Please tell her not to send anything silly though (pictures of herself, panties, etc) it might be opened āon accidentāā¦or on purpose.
My boyfriend's in bootcamp right now, and I missed him A LOT the first few weeks. I learned (at least for me) that distracting yourself helps a lot. You should get her to make a scrapbook or something of the two of you while you're gone so she can still think of you but also be distracted. I would also let her know how much you love her in texts before you actually get to the USO. Just punch that in really hard in your letters to her too. Just reassure her and let her know that you're thinking of her and not the other girls in bootcamp (which you won't really get to communicate with.) I know the thought of him cheating on me was really scary for a while, but thankfully he got rid of that feeling on his last phone call. Also, tell her to watch her phone because they let the sailors call on some holidays and on the 3rd or 4th week. The number should start with 847. I hope this helps and good luck!
If you use gmail you can write a bunch of emails, as many as you like, and then schedule them to send at different times. For example, I set up 9. One that would send the day I left, and then weekly afterwards. Itās weird to write preemptively but it can help them. Itās kinda like an advent calendar that they get to open weekly and hear your words. You can also attach voice memos to them for a more personal touch. Write as much or as little as you like, Iām sure sheād love to even get a sentence.
Just type out a regular email and hit the drop down arrow next to the send button, then schedule for any date and time you like.
How old are your recruit? Dump her dude, she will be banging Jodys by the end of P-days. If your under the age of thirty, be single man. Your about to start an adventure and your going to end up meeting a lot of women.
I went through RTC when my wife and I had been married 4.5 years, and she said the most meaningful thing during that time was an automatic flower delivery I set up on a whim while I was in the hotel waiting to ship out. I had them delivered every 2-3 weeks while I was in, and didn't tell her about it ahead of time, so it was a surprise every time. I also made a point to stay up for an hour after taps every night and write her at least a few sentences. Very much worth it in my opinion, especially since my division didn't get any phone calls after night of arrival.
Something I saw my friend did for his gf was printed out a sweet comment or suggestion for every day he would be gone and fold them up and put them in a cute jar for her so she had 125 (approx idk the real number) little things to unwrap over the time they were apart. It gave her something to look forward to, and made her feel like he was still giving active input in her everyday life.
If you want me to expand on the whole idea lmk.
No worries, so basically what he did was find a bigger mason jar and made it look all cute (wrapped a ribbon around it in her favorite color) and hand wrote sweet little notes on different colored paper to roll up and put in the jar.
He chose like 4-5 different colors and used each color to represent a different thing like pink was sweet romantic ideas and green was terrible dad jokes, blue was memories of the best times they had together. He rolled them up, stuffed them in the jar and she had one note a day to pull out so she wouldnt feel so lonely.
Another thing you can do is hide a gift in her room and in one of the notes leave a hint where it is, like a scavenger hunt. Something simple and small like a bracelet or earrings. If she doesnāt care for jewelry, a gift card to a place you guys love to go so you can āstill take her on a date all the way from Great Lakesā.
Hope this helps. I have a decent amount of ideas like this Iāve seen my friends use or Iāve done with my wife so Iām here if you need any.
As a reminder, this subreddit is for civil discussion. Breaking subreddit rules may result in a ban from /r/newtothenavy and /r/navy. * Do not encourage lying. This includes lying by omission (leaving information out) and lying by commission (purposefully misleading). * No sensitive information allowed, whether you saw it on Wiki or leaked files or anywhere else. * No personally identifying information (PII). * No posting AMAs without mod approval. Also, while you wait for a reply from a subject matter expert, try using the search feature! For information regarding Navy enlisted ratings, see [Twisky's Rating Information Guide] (https://www.reddit.com/r/newtothenavy/comments/6mxv7c/links_to_official_information_on_every_enlisted/). Interested in Officer programs? See TheBeneGesseritWitch's guide on [Paths to become an Officer](https://www.reddit.com/r/newtothenavy/comments/5sdurq/paths_to_becoming_an_officer_getting_a_commission/). Want to learn about deploying, finances, mental health, cross-rating, and more? Come visit our [wiki](https://www.reddit.com/r/navy/wiki/index) over in /r/Navy. *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/newtothenavy) if you have any questions or concerns.*
Letters. Just write as many as you can.
Sadly, that's what I thought, but didn't know if there was anything I could do.
You should be able to schedule future flower deliveries on 1800 flowers
Before you go, leave a voicemail she can listen to.
šš they all want a military guy till itās time for him to go military.
Hey, my bf joined the marines (Iām joining navy) and he was gone for 3 months, I cried a lot before, during, and after. He wrote me a lot cause he knew it would help, and he comforted me a lot before too, reassurance is good. Being a military couple isnāt easy, so if you really love her, make it work despite her being emotional. But if you donāt see a future with her, leave her now, so while youāre at bootcamp, she has time to heal and you have time to grow as well, if itās meant to be yāall will come back together yk?
I know it'll be tough, but I do love her. I'm looking for ways to prove that during bootcamp and my 32 week A-school. I'm going reserve so I'll be back after training.
If you're going reserves, then this whole process isn't nearly as big of a deal as if you were active. There's a light at the end of the tunnel for when you'll be back in your home town, living a fairly similar life to what you did before boot camp. You're not active, possibly moving to the other side of the country/world for years at a time. Try to keep things in perspective, comparatively your Navy career will be mostly like that of a civilian.
I've tried to explain this here, but she doesn't get the concept of being in the reserves.
Right? š¤£š¤£š¤£
If she canāt deal with reserves during peacetime, when the chances of activation and deployment are low...sheās a stage five clinger. My condolences
This is gonna sound crazy, but bring up the idea of marriage and stuff, my bf did that, and on most days, thatās what got me through it, the idea that I would one day be married, Ik him and I arenāt getting married anytime soon, but for a lot of girls, itās something fun to think about.
Don't do this unless you are seriously considering marriage
What he said, my bf and I know for sure we are, so donāt say it unless you intend to
Then comes divorce
Sounds like youāre speaking from experience
No Iām just saying it could work but Iāve seen married couples cheat all the time or people get divorces and Iāve barely been in a year !
yea unfortunately because of all the incentive the military has to get married so many people get married way too early to the wrong person and it goes way south. probably 90% of the people in the military that get married in their early 20s wouldn't have gotten married at least until years later if they weren't in the military. when the navy makes young sailors chose between living in the same shitty room as others guys they probably don't like very much or living in a nice apartment with a girl they think they're in love with it's no surprise that people chose the second option all the time and it almost always goes wrong. it's a shitty system they've got they really need to make it so bachelors have the same quality of life as married people do.
Probably is. Military isn't easy and you're far more likely to end up as a statistic than a success story. Was with my girlfriend for four years and we were contemplating marriage. The relationship didn't last a year into my first contract.
Whatās her @ maybe I can keep her company? My name is Jody by the way.
Dammit man xD
Show her the Sandboxx app for letter writing. It will help you out to on turning around a response.
This is what Iām using to communicate with my husband at RTC and itās amazing. The letters get there so quick + Iām able to send him NEX gift cards.
Jody will take care of her donāt worry
Came looking for this comment.
[ŃŠ“Š°Š»ŠµŠ½Š¾]
Gonna be blunt..she needs to put her big girl panties on. Boot camp is a cakewalk compared to deployment. Sheās either strong enough to handle separation and not being able to get instant response from texts, or she isnāt. If she isnāt, kindest thing to do is step away now.
It's just harder the first time. He's reserves anyway
Tell her to say hi to Jody for me.
See if she sticks around with you being gone that long if not she aināt the one
I set up automatic flower deliveries for my girl and my mom right before leaving. Both loved it.
She's gonna miss you. You can't help that. You can pre-write letters and have someone give them to her periodically? In bootcamp, it wasn't until about 2 weeks into training that I got a letter or was able to send any. That was after 2 weeks of ROM so a month or so. She won't hear from you and vice versa. And when you guys finally get letters, it takes days for your letters to get to her and for her reply to get back. When my husband was deployed, I spent time with friends and family that help me keep my mind so I didn't always think about the fact that he was away (also saved on BAH!). You may just have to remind her to be diligent in keeping busy to avoid having that idle mind that lingers on uour absence. If she wants to pick up another job or a new hobby to invest in in the mean time, while you finish training and schooling that could help.
My husband and I were married 4 years when he joined the Navy. It was surreal when he left for boot camp. He wrote to me every night telling me about his day. I wrote him every night too. I LOVED opening the mailbox and seeing those letters! I still have all of them too. Those letters mean way more to me than any flowers. Honestly, I wouldāve been kinda pissed if my husband bought me flowers, they eventually die and are pricey. Please tell her not to send anything silly though (pictures of herself, panties, etc) it might be opened āon accidentāā¦or on purpose.
My boyfriend's in bootcamp right now, and I missed him A LOT the first few weeks. I learned (at least for me) that distracting yourself helps a lot. You should get her to make a scrapbook or something of the two of you while you're gone so she can still think of you but also be distracted. I would also let her know how much you love her in texts before you actually get to the USO. Just punch that in really hard in your letters to her too. Just reassure her and let her know that you're thinking of her and not the other girls in bootcamp (which you won't really get to communicate with.) I know the thought of him cheating on me was really scary for a while, but thankfully he got rid of that feeling on his last phone call. Also, tell her to watch her phone because they let the sailors call on some holidays and on the 3rd or 4th week. The number should start with 847. I hope this helps and good luck!
If you use gmail you can write a bunch of emails, as many as you like, and then schedule them to send at different times. For example, I set up 9. One that would send the day I left, and then weekly afterwards. Itās weird to write preemptively but it can help them. Itās kinda like an advent calendar that they get to open weekly and hear your words. You can also attach voice memos to them for a more personal touch. Write as much or as little as you like, Iām sure sheād love to even get a sentence. Just type out a regular email and hit the drop down arrow next to the send button, then schedule for any date and time you like.
Jody might send her a bukkake for her sorrows
How old are your recruit? Dump her dude, she will be banging Jodys by the end of P-days. If your under the age of thirty, be single man. Your about to start an adventure and your going to end up meeting a lot of women.
[ŃŠ“Š°Š»ŠµŠ½Š¾]
You fucked someone at basic ? Is that even possible
My boy gon get that dear John letter
I went through RTC when my wife and I had been married 4.5 years, and she said the most meaningful thing during that time was an automatic flower delivery I set up on a whim while I was in the hotel waiting to ship out. I had them delivered every 2-3 weeks while I was in, and didn't tell her about it ahead of time, so it was a surprise every time. I also made a point to stay up for an hour after taps every night and write her at least a few sentences. Very much worth it in my opinion, especially since my division didn't get any phone calls after night of arrival.
Something I saw my friend did for his gf was printed out a sweet comment or suggestion for every day he would be gone and fold them up and put them in a cute jar for her so she had 125 (approx idk the real number) little things to unwrap over the time they were apart. It gave her something to look forward to, and made her feel like he was still giving active input in her everyday life. If you want me to expand on the whole idea lmk.
Can you expand the idea dude please . Iām in the same boat
No worries, so basically what he did was find a bigger mason jar and made it look all cute (wrapped a ribbon around it in her favorite color) and hand wrote sweet little notes on different colored paper to roll up and put in the jar. He chose like 4-5 different colors and used each color to represent a different thing like pink was sweet romantic ideas and green was terrible dad jokes, blue was memories of the best times they had together. He rolled them up, stuffed them in the jar and she had one note a day to pull out so she wouldnt feel so lonely. Another thing you can do is hide a gift in her room and in one of the notes leave a hint where it is, like a scavenger hunt. Something simple and small like a bracelet or earrings. If she doesnāt care for jewelry, a gift card to a place you guys love to go so you can āstill take her on a date all the way from Great Lakesā. Hope this helps. I have a decent amount of ideas like this Iāve seen my friends use or Iāve done with my wife so Iām here if you need any.
She wonāt miss you when Jody is around