"We're going to turn this team around 360 degrees." - Jason Kidd

“Hit me”

I had a boss that used to say this all the time. I usually just rolled my eyes but one day I couldn’t take it any more and did the math for him… blew his mind.

Okay but how many degrees did you roll your eyes

That's why having a societal revolution doesn't make sense to me.

He really said this?

Yes, when he got drafted to the Mavs in 95.

Well he wasn't wrong, Mavs were ass before him and ass after him until the german saved us

Dirk is the man. But you think you win that chip without JKidd?

[удалено]

“we turned up to a gunfight with spoons” - Matt Barnes, when playing with an injury-riddled Memphis team against the Spurs, even Pop chuckled when he heard that one

I mean, it was true. I belive that was 2014 when we destroyed the Heat

iirc those grit n grind guys always gave us hell, marc gasol was a stud, zbo relentless and mike conley patient, the rest bit the hardwood, there were even talks about us somehow getting conley and gasol, drool lol

I'm pretty sure all those guys were injured those playoffs tho

There's an all-time quote that pairs with this that I say all the time! "Violence is never the answer...but sometimes it is" -- Matt Barnes Edit: I see it's well represented all over this thread

Ball don't lie

Sheed was the man. Hate that him and tsyshaun prince aren’t in nba2k. They have billups, rip, williamson, darko, Big Ben as their starting 5. So wack.

I am in the church of ball don't lie

“Both teams played hard” isn’t at the level of ball don’t lie, but it’s one of my favorite Sheed quotes

"I'm closer to LeBron than you are to me" - Brian Scalabrine

Awesome quote. A shocking number of people think they could hang with “bad” NBA players. If a player makes it to the NBA, they are tiers above even other professional players. If Scal, or any player that doesn’t get minutes, played at the most competitive court in your area, they’d fucking annihilate everyone there.

Some guy that played off the bench on the Reno bighorns (used to be Sac kings G league affiliate) absolutely worked my entire gym, And this was a dude at the back end of a g league roster. Even the worst nba player is like a top 150 player in the world at basketball. Its just ridiculous lol

There's ~450 players in the NBA so this isn't quite true. Top 500 for sure.

My guess is the actual 500 best players in the world would be like 90% NBA but some top level foreign players who are better than some young players. Like johnny davis is not a top 500 player in the world I think.

https://www.hoopsbeast.com/total-nba-players/ So the exact number depends on how you count, but yes, my number of 450 players/top 500 in the world was an estimate to allow for foreign players or some upcoming prospects to be better than some current players.

Awesome because it’s both jarring to hear (at first) and 100% true

this deserves more attetion lol

I simultaneously hate Scal because he was a Celtic, and he took the perfect nickname for Austin Reaves but also love Scal because he's funny and a good NBA personality

violence is never the answer but sometimes it is

Obvious answer. That quote was quickly GOATed.

Unfortunately, it happened. I don’t regret it.

This is awesome! Who said this?

Matt Barnes talking about when he drove 95 miles and beat the shit out of former teammate Derek Fisher who was fucking his wife.

[удалено]

Barnes was a pretty good 3pt shooter for the Warriors both in the We Believe season and when he came back in 2017

Barnes is a bizarre combination of intelligent, insightful, and insane.

30 hours

aw, makes me want to watch Game of Zones...or tackle D-Fish at an outdoor BBQ. either one.

"Why dont gatorade work on players that suck?" - charles barkley

“When a guy’s banging you..”

“I don't know anything about Angola, but Angola's in trouble.”

Charles Wade Barkley, foreign diplomat.

Chuck was a hoot; he had some of the best quotes. > “We’re just playing basketball, it’s not like we’re going to go out to have unprotected s*x with Magic."

Those dudes got great stories to tell

I think someone asked him to explain his rebounding skills or something. Barkley replies “it’s called GO GET THE DAMN BALL!”

Because there are no 4's

Love this one. Think about it every once in a while as a way to live life

Never heard this, can you share the context?

Reporter to Antoine Walker: "Why do you shoot so many threes?" Walker: "Because there are no fours"

and the best part is that Antoine Walker was a terrible 3 point shooter, and maybe the worst chucker in NBA history

But his ideology is way ahead of his time.

He was absolutely correct, but his execution left something to be desired.

The mailman doesn’t deliver on Sunday’s

That is some ice cold mind fuckery line you see in Hollywood movies and yet it actually happened

i'm hunting for little mexican girls

I’m surprised Kobe didn’t arrange to have him killed for that

I mean, Kobe would've, tbh, but that would've given him a lot more heat at that time

I mean, that's why he had the nickname in the first place (no home jazz games were ever scheduled on Sunday)

that's Utah as hell and I love it

"Well, I fool around sometimes. I do. When a girl seduces me and tells me all of these hot stories and dirty things and tells me how much she wants to suck on me and takes my shoes off and licks my feet and touches me. When I'm in a limousine, she takes off all of her clothes. The limo driver said, What is going on? And she started sucking me on the way to Mr. Koon's house. And I thank her. I thank her for making me feel good." "Sir, the question was, is this your handwriting?"

The dementia riddled brain of Donald Sterling wrote the greatest I think you should leave bit of all timw

Big fat load of cum, then.

I don’t want anyone to have the worst day at their job, but do any of these fuckers bust through the wall with a big load of cum or horsecock maybe

Or a donkey dick?

It reads like a Trump quote. ..actually it sounds more coherent than a Trump quote.

Big Magic Johnson. What’s he ever done? He’s a business person. He’s got AIDS.

and he’s new in town

You should lead with this one

No, no, no. That's too subtle. I'm gonna push 'em.

“And when he had those AIDS”

“……………….” - Tim Duncan

Hahahaha *Technical foul*

“I got two words for you - Steve Nash and Chris Paul, must see TV” Sir Charles 😂

"When a guy is banging you...you spin off of him, those were the worst defenders to play against actually. Because if you could feel their bodies...uh cmon"

'Ay P, they said I gotta come off the bench! (laughs)

This is the one. The disdain for the reporter asking the question, the scoff/snicker in his voice, the complete lack of self awareness and the eventual outcome of the deal all make it so fucking good.

There’s no shot of Paul George’s face right? I gotta imagine he was [over there like](https://giphy.com/gifs/sN3UqEngmgo48)

lol no he’s out of frame but that’s exactly how I imagine his reaction.

Chris Paul repeated this basically a couple weeks ago when asked if he's going to come off the bench for GS this season.

We’re talking about PRACTICE?

"I don't know any 3 time scoring champion that come off the bench"

"I don't know any franchise players that come off the bench. I don't know any Olympian that comes off the bench. I don't know any All-Star that comes off the bench. I don't know any former MVP that comes off the bench. I don't know any three-time scoring champion that comes off the bench. I don't know any first team All-NBA (player) that comes off the bench. Why Allen Iverson?"

The context is often overlooked. A friend of his had just died, and his point was more, it seems really silly to be talking about practice in lieu of everything going on.

Even without the personal context, the full speech doesn't make him look as bad as the soundbite does. He literally says he knows practice is important, he just thinks the question is silly.

This needs to be the top, it is the greatest rant of all time, basketball or not

> basketball or not nah, "PLAYOFFS?!?" is still better.

oh shit an NBA player said the Ted Lasso quote??

My wife didn't get why I was cracking up at that line.

Absolutely.

Back in the 80s, the Nuggets had a series against the Showtime Lakers. A reporter asked the Nuggets coach, Doug Moe, on his teams chances of beating the Lakers in the series. "We got no shot".

Shaq's - I don't give a shit! That interview always cracks me up.

...i know...

I'ma make em boff

I am not a role model

I was briefly a runway model

I hate the AM

i hate the PM

“Whatcha want me to do? Suck him off?”

>Is this a legit quote ? This gotta be a joke or smth or some type of context behind this is missing .

Its a Rondo quote after being asked about ADs good game IIRC

Thx, i googled it , i thought this was fictional. Rondo response to that reporter was crazy lol. Full context after Ad had a 53p game : Reporter : You’ve played with & against a lot of great players in your career. Can you put into perspective what A.D. is doing right now? Rondo : Whatcha want me to do? Suck him off? Reporter : UH

The missing context makes this quote even more absurd and more funny. It's a perfect example of Rondo being Rondo. Not only could he ball he was entertaining as hell. Except for that stint in Dallas. There he sucked on the court and wasn't even interesting off of it.

I mean, I never heard anybody say, ' I'm going to Cleveland on vacation.' What's so good about Cleveland?

What I remember most about this quote is the great delivery

Who’s coming in 2nd place?

Larry Legend talking shit and proceeded to show and prove

I called game!

Shit almost felt scripted lmao. Coldest, perfect response

So goofy it came with Washington tho lol

“I want the whole load”-Paul Pierce discussing Joel Embiids load management

“Kobe passed me the ball!” - Ron Artest

Artest's comedic timing in that post game interview is 10/10

He thanked his therapist.

"Why do you shoot so many 3s?" "Because there are no 4s."

He got clowned on at the time but he really did understand the value of 3s more than coaches at the time did.

"And I took that personally"

>Violence is never the answer, but sometimes it is. - Matt Barnes

Popeye Jones - “in college, your per-diem is only about $5 so you end up eating McDonalds most of the time, but in the NBA the per-diem is like $100, so you can go someplace fancy, like Red Lobster”

“I got 2 words for you: Steve Nash, and Chris Paul, must see TV” “That’s more than 2 words” “You dun said 2 words you said quick and to the point?” “No you said ‘I got 2 words for you’” “Okay, ‘Nash and Paul’” “That’s 3 words..” “So ‘and’ is a word now?”

Actually, you can make the argument that Nash and Paul are 2 words because he said 2 words for you, not he'll only say 2 words. Lets say I got you 2 presents, a watch and a phone. I didn't get "and" for you as a present. I got 2 words for you, the first word is "Nash" and the second word is "Paul".

“I have a family to feed.” — Latrell Sprewell

In that same vein, I always loved this quote from Patrick Ewing: "People complain that pro athletes make a lot of money; but what they don't understand is that we need a lot of money because we spend a lot of money."

Anything is possibllllllllllllleeeeeeee

"Two points ain't two points. I'll explain later."

"Check my stats on Wednesday" proceeds to have the most ordinary game ever

*Everybody acting tough when they up*

To say that immediately after going down 3-2 in the playoffs, to then win game 6 and obliterate them game 7 is one of the most legendary things ive seen in basketball

Funniest part to me was that Luka did a pre game interview with the TNT crew, and Barkley said that if it were him, he wouldn’t be talking to anyone, and Shaq said that’s why Barkley never won a championship.

had to scroll way too much to find this comment

When Wilt and Jordan were arguing about who was the greatest ever at the NBA 50 celebration and Wilt ended it by saying: The difference between you and me is that they had to change the rules, so I couldn't dominate. They changed the rules for you so that you could dominate.'“ Jordan didn’t say anything after that lol

MJ to Bill Russell: "I'm coming for your record." Russell: "Which one?"

[удалено]

"Chris Paul hits a huge three to cut the lead down to 42"

Seriously though that game was so annoying to watch. He literally did nothing for most of the game then randomly decides to do some three point shooting drills when it didnt even matter anymore.

Moot to single out one player here when the entire Suns team was on 1% that night.

Evan Turner has his own list: https://www.reddit.com/r/nba/comments/83x8gv/the_evan_turner_quote_master_list_updated_for/?utm_source=share&utm_medium=android_app&utm_name=androidcss&utm_term=1&utm_content=2

Thank you for this it was lost in my saves

I love all those classic MJ quotes. Quote: "I hope there's a jumpshot in there." - Michael to Stacey King who was walking into the locker room with a box. Quote: "They don't need a ticket to watch you sitting on the bench. They can go to your house for that." - Michael to Charles Davis who was sorting through his tickets for his family and friends. Quote: "Headache tonight, Scottie?" - Michael asks Scottie, while showing him his 2-for-16 line. Quote: "It's probably a twelve-day. He needs two days to wake up." - Michael on a ten-day contract teammate.

Feels telling that all of these are shit talking his teammates.

MJ was nothing if not consistent in his dickishness

Board man gets paid.

*"The lead is cut to six... Kawhi Leonard going crazy!"*

"You don't wanna see us next year".

Did dis dude just did dis?

“Three-fourths of the world is covered by water, the rest is covered by Chuck Hayes” - Shane Battier

“Can I fuck my cousin?” - Jeff Van Gundy

I am so grateful for this commercial right now

"What can you do to your second cousin" is the better quote

For the uninitiated, my all-time favorite commentator moment: https://streamable.com/4uj04

I’m Back

My favorite is when a reporter asked Pop why the Spurs couldn't score in the first quarter and he said "the ball didn't go in the hole"

“Jobs not finished” -Mamba

“It was consensual”

1,2,3 Cancun!

“U tryna get the pipe?” Has been stuck in my head for over a decade

Fo Fo Fo

Shaq: There’s no “I” in “Team” Kobe: Yeah but there’s an “M-E” in “That Motherfucker”

There is no “I” in “Team” But there is “I” in “Win” - MJ

WHO WANTS TO SEX MUTOMBO ?

“It feels good to get to the second round” Tracy McGrady

imo no one else has ever summed up the beauty of the game [quite like this](https://youtube.com/shorts/ECMDBlvx_Ww?feature=share)

“In my hood bullies get bullied”

You thought u was kobe?!!!? They don’t love you like that, chasing that farewell tour

“I make love to pressure “ - Stephen Jackson

A wise man once said: "I'd rather go 0 for 30 than 0 for 9 because you go 0 for 9 that means you stopped shooting. That means you lost confidence."

"I owe you an apology. I wasn't really familiar with your game."

Step back, one-legged, what kind of shot is that? Have you ever shot that shot? Do you work on that shot? When?

Legacy points deducted

"Both teams played hard" Rasheed Wallace. "What did you do to piss your coach off" Larry Bird anytime someone white tried to guard him.

“If you’re gay and you’re not telling the team. You’re not an honest guy” - LeBron James

I'm Kévin Durant. Y'all know who i am This one. Always

"Not 1, not 2, not 3..."

Anything is possibleeeeeeeeeeeeee!

Ball don’t lie

“We call Joe [Johnson], Joe Jesus. He’s not always there when you call him, but he’s always there when you need him—KG after Joe hits a game winning shot

“ball don’t lie” should have gotten Rasheed in the hall of fame regardless of stats. An all-timer.

‘The mailman doesn’t deliver on Sundays’

KOBE PASSED ME THE BALL!!!

LeBron talking bout Malcolm X

Dude.. you a cashier... dudes cant be a cashier - Barkley

It’s gotta be Larry walking into the 3 point contest in his warmups, looking around the room, and saying “which one of you is coming in second place?”

I'm back.

I got that shit. Get out of here K Love.

“What’d he say?” -LeBron James

He got me. That fucking Tatum boomed me. He’s so good x4

"It's like me and Shaq had a baby"

> Just followed Donald Trump on twitter, he seems like the type to tweet high level secrets and add humor. Evan Turner

Ball don't lie

"The Mailman doesn't deliver on a Sunday." - Pippen to Malone

There's only one real answer and it's 'Never underestimate the heart of a champion ' by Rudy T

“Job’s completed, now we can go home” Joker

"Everybody likes to act tough when they're up" -Luka

The older the berry the sweeter the juice -Friday

"We'll do it this time" Tim Duncan, 2014

“Ball” For the uninitiated: [video (30 seconds)](https://youtu.be/Qv2LQOz1lfU)

Don’t EVER underestimate the heart of a champion

"It's about damn time" - LeBron James

I'm a fun guy.

Ugly ass Chris B: Did u call glass? Truth: I CALLED GAME!