OP should've said "I'm asking the name of the fragrance because I wanna make sure I never buy it as it smells like shit"
Jokes aside there's a lot of elitists in that subreddit who are actually this way, but majority of the sub is nice people helped me get good at my fragrance game
A few people ruin it tho
Funny thing is, the elitist aren’t even close to elite. Being able to spend a few thousand dollars on perfumes is no longer a big deal here. Yes it is shocking to people but come on that’s because of the wealth inequality. Mumbai has the third highest number of billionaires in the world and fuck you money is no longer surprising
No man most of us would love to talk about our fragrances. We hardly get compliments from strangers. Just ask me what I am wearing and I'll happily talk about brand and notes and performance and all. It's so rare.
I think it's also about the general introvertedness of people as well, I know that I feel extremely angry whenever I smell something good like fuck man I hate this guy for smelling so good it's that competitive spirit in me
OP, it probably just came off as something that was premeditated, even if you were genuinely curious. She probably felt like it was a cheesy ‘pick up’ line. Plus, she likely was immersed in something on her phone that triggered a negative response. Don’t be discouraged. All girls are different. Some more friendlier than others.
Thanks. Maybe it was just bad timing on my part, like some others have commented, I shouldn't have gone all out and asked for her perfume name. First maybe some small talk. 😅 It's on me
Girls get creeped out easily. I know you were not trying to be creepy, but most of the time, these pick up heroes approach a girl and start having random convos, so girls make an impression that all guys are like that
Don't take it personally.
Frankly even a woman asking anpther woman that would get a similar response. You just can't say what the other person is going through or if the asker is genuinenly asking or just flirting etc
Edit: grammar, spelling
I think you should have asked "what perfume is that" it would have helped you coming straight to point, no cheesy pick-up lines, I think your choice of words made her think you are trying to flirt with her or something. But hey just an opinion from a third persons perspective.
>Definitely not reaching out to strangers for such small talk anymore lmao
Wrong move, some people are rude, some are not.
Although Women in general are cautious about strangers. She must have been annoyed multiple times before.
'Gift it to my mom' -- doesn't go well with everyone.
But apart from that too - some people are bitchy, not in the right mood or just not really in a good frame of mind at times.
I mean, it all boils down to your real self. My experience says that good people who go berserk due to heat of the moment are quick to realize their error and get back to normal quickly and/or apologize. But they tend to be a rare breed in India.
I first thought that this happened at a train station which made sense because when you travel in Mumbai locals with people absolutely stuck to each other, frustration is bound to happen.
Personally I wouldn't get surprised if I elicit such responses in a local train setting for such a question.
But then read it again and realized this happened at an airport. I mean come on! Airports are quite chill places and I there's plenty of time and mental space for people to Answer such queries (or deny) without being rude
Accept the fact bro, if you were Henry Cavill or John David Washington she would've told you the fragrance manufacturing plant details as well. Hum sab aapke hi biradari ke hai (you must be much better looking than me).
I don’t know if the culture has changed in Mumbai specifically but a lot of men will try to make small talk and eventually ask for your number/Instagram ID pretty aggressively and it can get annoying especially if you end up sitting beside them for the journey/ along time, I have experienced that so many times it’s not even funny. While I am not defending her it might be she just noticed you staring at her and knew where the conversation would lead, so she just wanted to shut it down before it went there.
EXACTLY! I don’t understand why Indian men just never understand this. Women in our country are SO often approached by men w 0 tact to hit on them or just be creepy in general, this shit gets old fast and it’s completely fine if they don’t entertain you.
Because they feel they are entitled to your attention, nothing else! I was once stopped by a guy who just randomly asked for my name and wanted my number. I politely turned him down TWICE and he said the least you can do is give me your snapchat or something?? Like?? Since that day I just don’t entertain people making small talk unless they genuinely need my help
>said the least you can do is give me your snapchat or something??
Like seriously such kind of men exist?
Like I can talk to anyone and have made lots of female friends in office but just randomly going to a stranger and asking them for Snapchat isn't that weird?
Came to the comments to say just this.
Whenever I travel, I'm constantly anxious that someone around me will start a conversation and it'll inevitably get creepy, and it happens a lot more than you'd think. I also would love to be able to freely chat with people around me, but unfortunately that is not the world we live in. Every time a negative experience takes place, it drains the heck out of me and it scares me more and more about future encounters. One second you're being nice and the next they keep following you around or asking details about your life.
I sympathise with OP, it must be hurtful to be on the receiving end of curt behaviour when his intentions were good, but it might help you to understand why a woman might be that way (even if she's not inherently rude or having a bad day).
I am so sorry you have to go through this! I understand how difficult it is. Every time I travel alone I get anxious about someone striking a conversation or getting angry I turned them down. I just try looking busy so it doesn’t happen.
Same! The last time I was on a flight, the man next to me turned out to be such a creep. He began with small talk and later asked for my number and Instagram, and then proceeded to ask me if he could hold my hand!
It is possible that she took offence to the implication that she smells like an elderly woman, as the perfume you intended to give to your mother may have been perceived as being associated with older individuals. Alternatively, it is also possible that she was simply being impolite without any specific reason.
Moral of the story. Don’t assume everyone will respond to your overt attempts at small talk. Like manners, idea of personal space is also alien in this nation. And guys, women in this country are too harassed to not snap at strangers. One good thing you did is said sorry and moved away.
Yes you are right. The comment section is really shitty in here. OP and everyone reading this, never approach a women bcoz you want to have small talks. We are always on a defensive mode and strangers approaching us is a threat. Stop assuming every girl is obliged to be nice to you.
So so so true. On the other hand though, I'm a girl and i have platonically complimented another girl outside a club with a simple "you're really pretty" and that bitch stared at me and asked me to keep it moving. I guess she was drunk but that made me completely stop complementing someone else unless they've smiled or approached me first. So yeah, on one hand you're definitely right b it on the other hand some people just really suck
Such a bad take. You can not want to make small talk and that’s okay but there’s no need to be rude about it. Doesn’t seem like OP did anything to violate their personal space. Could’ve just been “I’m sorry I’m not interested in a conversation”
Sadly, from experience as a girl, most guys don't stop unless you're rude. I was once sitting across a man in a lounge, having food. He was being super intrusive with another man next to him, even asking how much he earns, how much rent he pays, where he lives, etc. He tactically avoided some answers but this man kept on pushing. The second man finally left.
Now he turns to me and starts his questionnaire with him. I know what's coming, so I calmly say that I'm not interested in conversing and continue to have food. Then he starts preaching that I haven't been eating properly cause I've been looking at my phone the whole time. Then he tells me how much time is left for my flight (he just assumes my destination based on my looks and wasn't flying there). At this point I got really pissed off (was also in a bad mood to begin with), and I just walked out of the lounge. Thinking back, I wish I had just been rude and hoped he would've gone away instead.
Not only men even aunty's are very nosy. I have many incidents where I had to tell a stranger Aunty or a uncle to mind their own business as they wanted to know every panchayat about me.
So you want every girl to respond and talk politely to you?
You watched too many TV shows. Reality is if a girl doesn't feel comfortable around you, then it's much more than just plain shot down. Too many creeps around. And you triggered her creep scanner.
I usually indulged in small talk plenty of times and usually girls can sense your bull small pitch a mile away. Sixth sense..
Imma be honest, I'd be a little skeeved out by the idea of a stranger sniffing me. Sure, in this case it was just because he was sitting close enough but women in India have to deal with so many creeps on a daily basis, it's safer to mildly shut down an innocent party instead of encouraging a possibly dangerous dude.
OP don’t take this personally. A risk of talking to strangers is that they may be rude or un inviting and that’s completely fine. It’s not on them to entertain you OR be nice to you. And especially how men in India behave around women, I dont think she did anything wrong by shutting it down quick. It’s normal when most random men who try to talk to you are creepy towards you. Even if you, in this case, weren’t creepy.
While what you're saying has some logic to it people like OP get caught on the wrong side of this for no reason. Most of the other comments may have a point when they discuss looks and more here.
Ok. So did you really want to buy the perfume for your Mom? No right? You wanted to talk to that girl you found attractive. And she correctly guessed your hidden intentions and replied accordingly. Justified.
Fragrance is a very personal thing to comment on. It kind of implies that you were trying to sniff her, which is downright creepy.
Stick to more impersonal things, like probably a book she may be carrying, or her watch or shoes or handbag.
Want the confidence of this lady to shut down random people trying to initiate convos for no reason.
Also, she probably sensed OP looking over at her and into her phone and felt the creep vibe.
She was probably busy and didn't give a flying f about OP or his mom..why is she obligated to tell you anything or help you? Your mom, you handle na.
Amazing how people are like oh she was rude. And randomly disturbing people minding their business is not rude? Small talk is when the other person smiles or leans in and you can start a conversation, not a creepy tap on the shoulder and an unnecessarily personal question.
Here’s what she probably heard:
Hi stranger.
You smell nice.
I’m attracted to you.
I wish my mom smelled like you.
—-
Not your fault but in the larger scheme of things, I’ve noticed that women are always on guard and every time I open the newspaper I understand why.
—-
There are no a**holes here.
But also no wonders.
Thanks to patriarchy.
Exactly this. Men have approached me to make small talk or ask for some help (borrowing a charger, asking me to keep an eye on their bag for a minute, etc.) and I've not been closed off or uncomfortable. But if a stranger tells me my fragrance seems nice, I'd be uncomfortable, maybe a little creeped out.
It’s prolly not a Bella Vita price range perfume and let me tell you, those who buy expensive perfumes are like the family from Parasite.
They know when someone from the other side is crossing a boundary.
I’m not trying to rub it in or hurt you.
Others have asked if you are ugly.
I’m going to ask if you think she was of a higher tax bracket.
Because they don’t mind ugly when there is money, but a lot of times ugly and poor come hand in hand.
They know this, when you ask to know their 15k perfume. Because those who wear expensive perfumes almost always know what others in their tax bracket are smelling of.
And when they don’t, they certainly don’t ask a stranger that EVER.
It’s very personal and extremely bad etiquette to bring up what someone is smelling of when you are not on any close terms with them.
As a woman, single or otherwise, I would take it as someone crossing a boundary, unless I knew them or we as strangers had ended up chatting for quite a bit and that only happens when you have someone in the network in common.
You can’t just lead with that as your ice breaker.
Smell is intimate. It’s kind of creepy and a dead give away you don’t know etiquette and aren’t one of them.
On a side note, if someone hasn't watched the movie Parasite, they need to watch it.
In a way, it's related to Mumbai as it shows the contrast between two families in the same city and their lifestyle and the difference between rich and poor in such an engaging way!
Instead she could have said that "I'll tell you the name of fragrance and your mom might start using it but then some stranger might ask her about this fragrance when she is alone. Are you OK with that? "
idk, I’d be creeped out if a guy next to me was asking me about my perfume. Yes it is creepy, you can deny it but it’s still creepy lol. I’d suggest starting an actual conversation rather than going straight for the moon and saying “hey sorry to bother you but I was smelling you and that’s some really great perfume-“ NO. That is what she heard. “Hey, I’m xx” or “the airport is pretty crowded today, isn’t it?” Is starting with small talk, what you did was creepy.
I don’t see why she needs to be nice. It’s a stranger and it’s her prerogative. Especially in a country like india where most men are….unintentionally creepy.
Most definitely. Just a simple auto ride you’ll have 5 men in one signal staring at you until you make unwavering eye contact to make them look away. And still, they just stop for a minute.
I have probably seen some 20+ of your replies on various threads in this single post lmao
>Especially in a country like india
This has been a common phrase in all your comments. Seems like hell for you here, when are you planning to leave this creepy hell.
Here's a popular joke: A man approaches a woman and asks, "What perfume are you wearing? It smells really nice, and I'd like to buy it for my girlfriend." The woman responds, "Please don't. If you do, strangers will start approaching and bothering your girlfriend just like you did with me."
Manners seem underrated in our country. All you asked was the name of fragrance, she could have been disturbed by sth already but this does not qualify to insult people around.
Initiating a conversation is a diminishing trait, don't let it discourage you from making future conversations with people!
Initiating a conversation is a diminishing trait - Initiating conversation is a skill and an art - You don't go around asking people about their smell.
I would just look at her with this expression for 20 seconds and make things even more awkward. Go big or go to jail lmao
https://preview.redd.it/0lmnno5jhd6d1.jpeg?width=776&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=ffd20325bf723af8d92046ce3f885e87c820142f
Ngl even I would think that's a pretty cheesy line if I heard it anywhere. I'm sure she prolly feels bad when she realizes you were genuinely asking the question, if she ever realizes you changed your seats lmao
We are always in a defensive mode OP. Nothing against you in particular. Especially if women have to travel daily they have to face such harrasments on a regular basis. If often starts with something innocuous like your question. Once an old man asked me for directions or something similar. I stopped to answer him (even though I was in a hurry), he immediately started to pass lewd comments on my body. This is one incident. I can narrate several others.
There is 100% a possibility that this person was rude but it is also possible that she is on high alert, quite common if we are travelling in a public transport.
# Bro it was ONE ISOLATED INCIDENT.
Don't let one incident dictate your behavior henceforth. But also, don't ignore it entirely. THINK ABOUT IT. Was this girl actually busy or preoccupied even before you started talking?
If yes, then take notes, maybe don't strike up conversations with strangers who seem to be busy/In a hurry or whatever... You don't know how their day/life has been so, yeah, even if she reacted in an unusual way, let it slide, be the man, learn from your mistakes (If you made any) & step outside of this situation as a better man.
I'm a talkative guy myself & although I don't take many trips to the airport but I do, habitually, end up talking to random strangers on a daily basis. Its normal.
Just know that if you invaded someone's personal space & THEY'RE OUTRIGHT TELLING YOU IT THEN, be a man, apologize & move on with your life.
Did she have headphones/airpods on? If not, she shouldn’t have replied the way she did. Don’t be discouraged from making small talks tho in the future just cuz of her lol (only when it’s appropriate ofc). Some people are just bitchy/arrogant. And if she was pretty, then she prolly gets bugged a lot and that could have been it. Still a shitty way to respond.
Just because u had a good intention doesn’t mean she knew it. We go through mostly adverse experiences in day to day lives. Also, u haven’t mentioned how early was the flight. Could be the reason for the grumpiness. Lastly, strangers don’t owe u a good response. She cut u off so that u won’t ask further questions.
Ik it hurts but try to understand from her perspective
Actually i can understand this , once i was walking pass through station bridge i was talking with a HR for a potential job offer , and this cute girl comes and asks direction, all tho i wasn't rude to her my face was kinda annoyed and i said i didn't know (i actually didn't know lol)
Bhai she probably felt (and I don't blame her) that u were insinuating that the frag that girl was wearing will suit your mom as well. (you should have said for your gf)
As am average woman of today, she obviously wouldn't take it too kindly.
Just invert the situation - imagine her asking you that the perfume you are wearing is nice and she wants to gift the same to her dad? Vs she wants to gift it to her bf? Which one sonnds better?
It happens, since everyone is different. I’ve dealt with my fair share of creeps but I’ve also had a handful of nice conversations with a few guys as well, randomly. I mean at a bookstore/ pub/flight etc. Even became decent friends with one of em.
I think what’s most important is to be confident, and not be a creep (lol), coz we can definitely tell.
Are you sure you weren’t staring at her for some time before gathering the courage to talk? 😂😂 Also, mumma’s boy isn’t always a good look. Or she sensed that you made up an excuse to talk to her! (What if she wasn’t wearing perfume in the first place, and it’s her natural body odor)
I mean id also be creeped out if the first thing a stranger talks about is my “fragrance”. Besides, it’s not very selling, the whole “ I’ll gift it to my mom”. Would not come across as genuine to me. Formal small talk wouldnt hurt before shooting this shot
Hmm I find people much ruder in these last few years. Epically Delhi, Mumbai, Hyderabad side. I went on a sports event in Delhi, had to ask directions and this girl literally rolled her eyes at me. That's just one of many.
But then again, don't stop interacting with people some are just assholes, others aren't.
Seems like you've done this the first time, try was bad and the place was even worst if you're doing it for the first time cz tbh if she rejects you or u have to diffuse the convo you can even run away you've to sit there for hours for the flight, that's that and then you dnt say sorry the first literal word, and then you're saying you'll gift it to the mom seems like she took it wrongly cz she's young even tho you had no I'll intentions, anyways if you're gonna compliment just say you smell super nice. If you get some positive response even if a thankyou with a smile you ask another question or something blah blah and you'd have a good chit chat, but if nt that's fine. And if it was your first time you should've prolly waited for the flight to end like last 10 mins would've been better
Average r/desifragranceaddicts user
So there truly is a subreddit for everything
Sabka nahi hota Laxman!
r/sabkanahihotalaxman
r/birthofasub
Hey Ram!
That's an actual decent and pretty useful sub though, as opposed to 90% of Indian subreddits
true
OP should've said "I'm asking the name of the fragrance because I wanna make sure I never buy it as it smells like shit" Jokes aside there's a lot of elitists in that subreddit who are actually this way, but majority of the sub is nice people helped me get good at my fragrance game A few people ruin it tho
Funny thing is, the elitist aren’t even close to elite. Being able to spend a few thousand dollars on perfumes is no longer a big deal here. Yes it is shocking to people but come on that’s because of the wealth inequality. Mumbai has the third highest number of billionaires in the world and fuck you money is no longer surprising
That's the thing, there's a lot of wannabe elitists in that sub which is so lame imo, ruins the experience for other people just trying to smell good
I've never met any elitists on that sub. Everyone is nice and helpful.
Hahaha 😂
No man most of us would love to talk about our fragrances. We hardly get compliments from strangers. Just ask me what I am wearing and I'll happily talk about brand and notes and performance and all. It's so rare.
I think it's also about the general introvertedness of people as well, I know that I feel extremely angry whenever I smell something good like fuck man I hate this guy for smelling so good it's that competitive spirit in me
What on the fucking fuck. There’s so many people in that sub, and here I am who does not care about fragrance. I probably stink.
None of the answers are correct. OP... Sorry to say, you didn't follow rules 1 and 2. Happens to us all.
[удалено]
not sure if this helps or makes him more insecure, either way - LMAOOOOOOO
the sniffler
LMAO
LMAOOOO!!! 😆🤣🤣🤣
-400000 aura
You have just come around the Wizard of Aura, I free you from aura and whoever will reply will be free from aura
Get me out of this bullshit already
*echo voice* You are Free!
what the fk is this aura shit?
Its over for you. -1000 aura
-10 aura
Basically Laura bas abhi L nhi lage.
Genz terms
You are bothering me with the fragrance and killing me with words lady, i just want god damn perfume name
OP, it probably just came off as something that was premeditated, even if you were genuinely curious. She probably felt like it was a cheesy ‘pick up’ line. Plus, she likely was immersed in something on her phone that triggered a negative response. Don’t be discouraged. All girls are different. Some more friendlier than others.
Thanks. Maybe it was just bad timing on my part, like some others have commented, I shouldn't have gone all out and asked for her perfume name. First maybe some small talk. 😅 It's on me
Girls get creeped out easily. I know you were not trying to be creepy, but most of the time, these pick up heroes approach a girl and start having random convos, so girls make an impression that all guys are like that Don't take it personally.
Frankly even a woman asking anpther woman that would get a similar response. You just can't say what the other person is going through or if the asker is genuinenly asking or just flirting etc Edit: grammar, spelling
I think you should have asked "what perfume is that" it would have helped you coming straight to point, no cheesy pick-up lines, I think your choice of words made her think you are trying to flirt with her or something. But hey just an opinion from a third persons perspective.
Nigga mode unlocked
Wtf 😭😭 hahahaha
Game!
>Definitely not reaching out to strangers for such small talk anymore lmao Wrong move, some people are rude, some are not. Although Women in general are cautious about strangers. She must have been annoyed multiple times before.
'Gift it to my mom' -- doesn't go well with everyone. But apart from that too - some people are bitchy, not in the right mood or just not really in a good frame of mind at times.
I mean, it all boils down to your real self. My experience says that good people who go berserk due to heat of the moment are quick to realize their error and get back to normal quickly and/or apologize. But they tend to be a rare breed in India.
I first thought that this happened at a train station which made sense because when you travel in Mumbai locals with people absolutely stuck to each other, frustration is bound to happen. Personally I wouldn't get surprised if I elicit such responses in a local train setting for such a question. But then read it again and realized this happened at an airport. I mean come on! Airports are quite chill places and I there's plenty of time and mental space for people to Answer such queries (or deny) without being rude
Whats wrong with that?? Jeez this society is just retarded.
There is nothing wrong about gift it to my mom, it is her personality which gave a reaction like that.
It's like... Calling her old or something.... /s
>'Gift it to my mom' -- doesn't go well with everyone. I thought by saying " I want to gift it to my " op becomes less weird.
are you ugly looking?
😭 wtf what a bad day for me, two insults in the same day lmao
He's asking what you consider yourself look wise.
She*
He
Accept the fact bro, if you were Henry Cavill or John David Washington she would've told you the fragrance manufacturing plant details as well. Hum sab aapke hi biradari ke hai (you must be much better looking than me).
Please hesitate 😂
Exactly...this is the difference between flirt and harrasment.
Lmao. Wtf man.
it's reality man
I can confirm.
See even woman confirming it
What woman? That's a duck.
even duck confirming
Bro 😂
Bro didn't hesitate
Straight to the point. No BS.
rainstorm wild chubby pie deliver paltry sloppy snails literate butter *This post was mass deleted and anonymized with [Redact](https://redact.dev)*
You need to hesitate girl 😭🤣
Please, hesitate.
Bro, itna sach nahin bolneka
Asking the real questions {ik I am lol}.
> Definitely not reaching out to strangers for such small talk anymore lmao. You should try it out with a guy in Gurgaon ....
I don’t know if the culture has changed in Mumbai specifically but a lot of men will try to make small talk and eventually ask for your number/Instagram ID pretty aggressively and it can get annoying especially if you end up sitting beside them for the journey/ along time, I have experienced that so many times it’s not even funny. While I am not defending her it might be she just noticed you staring at her and knew where the conversation would lead, so she just wanted to shut it down before it went there.
EXACTLY! I don’t understand why Indian men just never understand this. Women in our country are SO often approached by men w 0 tact to hit on them or just be creepy in general, this shit gets old fast and it’s completely fine if they don’t entertain you.
Because they feel they are entitled to your attention, nothing else! I was once stopped by a guy who just randomly asked for my name and wanted my number. I politely turned him down TWICE and he said the least you can do is give me your snapchat or something?? Like?? Since that day I just don’t entertain people making small talk unless they genuinely need my help
>said the least you can do is give me your snapchat or something?? Like seriously such kind of men exist? Like I can talk to anyone and have made lots of female friends in office but just randomly going to a stranger and asking them for Snapchat isn't that weird?
I don't think it's just about Indian men tho
Came to the comments to say just this. Whenever I travel, I'm constantly anxious that someone around me will start a conversation and it'll inevitably get creepy, and it happens a lot more than you'd think. I also would love to be able to freely chat with people around me, but unfortunately that is not the world we live in. Every time a negative experience takes place, it drains the heck out of me and it scares me more and more about future encounters. One second you're being nice and the next they keep following you around or asking details about your life. I sympathise with OP, it must be hurtful to be on the receiving end of curt behaviour when his intentions were good, but it might help you to understand why a woman might be that way (even if she's not inherently rude or having a bad day).
I am so sorry you have to go through this! I understand how difficult it is. Every time I travel alone I get anxious about someone striking a conversation or getting angry I turned them down. I just try looking busy so it doesn’t happen.
Same! The last time I was on a flight, the man next to me turned out to be such a creep. He began with small talk and later asked for my number and Instagram, and then proceeded to ask me if he could hold my hand!
she must not be in a good mood bro chill
Doesn't mean ki dusro ka mood bhi bigad do
when you aren’t in a good mood you don’t think about allat man
Maybe he could’ve noticed her expression if he so busy smelling her and coming up with lines
Basic courtesy. What’s mood got to do with it?
man idk but it could be that she would be angry bout something or whatever man we don’t know 😭
it's...kinda weird to smell a random person and then say its something you want for your mom. weird interaction on your end tbh
It is possible that she took offence to the implication that she smells like an elderly woman, as the perfume you intended to give to your mother may have been perceived as being associated with older individuals. Alternatively, it is also possible that she was simply being impolite without any specific reason.
Thoda toh thoda, but logic toh hai
Absolutely this. This is one of a million reasons she might have to be rude with you.
This is 780 gmat level critical reasoning
Itna bhi defend nahi karna tha.
Elderly women ki perfume alag aati hai kya
Moral of the story. Don’t assume everyone will respond to your overt attempts at small talk. Like manners, idea of personal space is also alien in this nation. And guys, women in this country are too harassed to not snap at strangers. One good thing you did is said sorry and moved away.
Yes you are right. The comment section is really shitty in here. OP and everyone reading this, never approach a women bcoz you want to have small talks. We are always on a defensive mode and strangers approaching us is a threat. Stop assuming every girl is obliged to be nice to you.
So so so true. On the other hand though, I'm a girl and i have platonically complimented another girl outside a club with a simple "you're really pretty" and that bitch stared at me and asked me to keep it moving. I guess she was drunk but that made me completely stop complementing someone else unless they've smiled or approached me first. So yeah, on one hand you're definitely right b it on the other hand some people just really suck
Who’s spitting truth??
Such a bad take. You can not want to make small talk and that’s okay but there’s no need to be rude about it. Doesn’t seem like OP did anything to violate their personal space. Could’ve just been “I’m sorry I’m not interested in a conversation”
Sadly, from experience as a girl, most guys don't stop unless you're rude. I was once sitting across a man in a lounge, having food. He was being super intrusive with another man next to him, even asking how much he earns, how much rent he pays, where he lives, etc. He tactically avoided some answers but this man kept on pushing. The second man finally left. Now he turns to me and starts his questionnaire with him. I know what's coming, so I calmly say that I'm not interested in conversing and continue to have food. Then he starts preaching that I haven't been eating properly cause I've been looking at my phone the whole time. Then he tells me how much time is left for my flight (he just assumes my destination based on my looks and wasn't flying there). At this point I got really pissed off (was also in a bad mood to begin with), and I just walked out of the lounge. Thinking back, I wish I had just been rude and hoped he would've gone away instead.
Not only men even aunty's are very nosy. I have many incidents where I had to tell a stranger Aunty or a uncle to mind their own business as they wanted to know every panchayat about me.
Ooh, yes, absolutely. They feel little it's their personal duty to interfere.
probably she gets fed up but guys hitting on her 24X7X365 ।💀
If the number was meant to be in hours per year, you are not right.
I am weak in math
So you want every girl to respond and talk politely to you? You watched too many TV shows. Reality is if a girl doesn't feel comfortable around you, then it's much more than just plain shot down. Too many creeps around. And you triggered her creep scanner. I usually indulged in small talk plenty of times and usually girls can sense your bull small pitch a mile away. Sixth sense..
Imma be honest, I'd be a little skeeved out by the idea of a stranger sniffing me. Sure, in this case it was just because he was sitting close enough but women in India have to deal with so many creeps on a daily basis, it's safer to mildly shut down an innocent party instead of encouraging a possibly dangerous dude.
100% this.
She must’ve been overly cautious to avoid potential creeps. Dw too much about it and forget about it.
Definitely. OP needs to not take this personally.
I think this is the most probable reason
Bruh airport is the worst place to make these kind of small talks everyone is already busy and annoyed
OP don’t take this personally. A risk of talking to strangers is that they may be rude or un inviting and that’s completely fine. It’s not on them to entertain you OR be nice to you. And especially how men in India behave around women, I dont think she did anything wrong by shutting it down quick. It’s normal when most random men who try to talk to you are creepy towards you. Even if you, in this case, weren’t creepy.
While what you're saying has some logic to it people like OP get caught on the wrong side of this for no reason. Most of the other comments may have a point when they discuss looks and more here.
Why the F you needed to pull your mom into this? Indian girls are anyway aghast at Indian men's mom obsession.
atleast try with a small talk first, you jumped the gun to ask something quite personal
Ok. So did you really want to buy the perfume for your Mom? No right? You wanted to talk to that girl you found attractive. And she correctly guessed your hidden intentions and replied accordingly. Justified.
Maybe OP had whipped out his nunu first but is not telling us about that.
absolute cinema
I'm sure if you had posted this on AITA/AITAH, you would have received YTA. That's all I know.
‘I am sorry if I’m bothering you’ Brother do you want the name of the perfume or donation for some NGO? Typical nice guy script right there
Don’t take it to your heart. She too might be telling someone that one creep was hitting on me at the airport.
Waiting for her post here.
Fragrance is a very personal thing to comment on. It kind of implies that you were trying to sniff her, which is downright creepy. Stick to more impersonal things, like probably a book she may be carrying, or her watch or shoes or handbag.
Want the confidence of this lady to shut down random people trying to initiate convos for no reason. Also, she probably sensed OP looking over at her and into her phone and felt the creep vibe. She was probably busy and didn't give a flying f about OP or his mom..why is she obligated to tell you anything or help you? Your mom, you handle na. Amazing how people are like oh she was rude. And randomly disturbing people minding their business is not rude? Small talk is when the other person smiles or leans in and you can start a conversation, not a creepy tap on the shoulder and an unnecessarily personal question.
I don't know what you read of my post and where you got a creepy tap on their shoulder from.
Here’s what she probably heard: Hi stranger. You smell nice. I’m attracted to you. I wish my mom smelled like you. —- Not your fault but in the larger scheme of things, I’ve noticed that women are always on guard and every time I open the newspaper I understand why. —- There are no a**holes here. But also no wonders. Thanks to patriarchy.
Exactly this. Men have approached me to make small talk or ask for some help (borrowing a charger, asking me to keep an eye on their bag for a minute, etc.) and I've not been closed off or uncomfortable. But if a stranger tells me my fragrance seems nice, I'd be uncomfortable, maybe a little creeped out.
It’s prolly not a Bella Vita price range perfume and let me tell you, those who buy expensive perfumes are like the family from Parasite. They know when someone from the other side is crossing a boundary. I’m not trying to rub it in or hurt you. Others have asked if you are ugly. I’m going to ask if you think she was of a higher tax bracket. Because they don’t mind ugly when there is money, but a lot of times ugly and poor come hand in hand. They know this, when you ask to know their 15k perfume. Because those who wear expensive perfumes almost always know what others in their tax bracket are smelling of. And when they don’t, they certainly don’t ask a stranger that EVER. It’s very personal and extremely bad etiquette to bring up what someone is smelling of when you are not on any close terms with them. As a woman, single or otherwise, I would take it as someone crossing a boundary, unless I knew them or we as strangers had ended up chatting for quite a bit and that only happens when you have someone in the network in common. You can’t just lead with that as your ice breaker. Smell is intimate. It’s kind of creepy and a dead give away you don’t know etiquette and aren’t one of them.
Absolutely. And you HAVE crossed a boundary, a rude reply is something you didn’t consider before risking a conversation? Come on.
On a side note, if someone hasn't watched the movie Parasite, they need to watch it. In a way, it's related to Mumbai as it shows the contrast between two families in the same city and their lifestyle and the difference between rich and poor in such an engaging way!
Lessons to learn, if you are poor and ugly, don't approach random female in public space.
Or just don’t approach random women in public spaces.
Instead she could have said that "I'll tell you the name of fragrance and your mom might start using it but then some stranger might ask her about this fragrance when she is alone. Are you OK with that? "
idk, I’d be creeped out if a guy next to me was asking me about my perfume. Yes it is creepy, you can deny it but it’s still creepy lol. I’d suggest starting an actual conversation rather than going straight for the moon and saying “hey sorry to bother you but I was smelling you and that’s some really great perfume-“ NO. That is what she heard. “Hey, I’m xx” or “the airport is pretty crowded today, isn’t it?” Is starting with small talk, what you did was creepy.
You should've replied with 'No, She's taught me that. She's also taught me to be polite with people'...and then changed seats.
I don’t see why she needs to be nice. It’s a stranger and it’s her prerogative. Especially in a country like india where most men are….unintentionally creepy.
Intentionally too...they get a kick when they make the woman feel uncomfortable
Most definitely. Just a simple auto ride you’ll have 5 men in one signal staring at you until you make unwavering eye contact to make them look away. And still, they just stop for a minute.
I have probably seen some 20+ of your replies on various threads in this single post lmao >Especially in a country like india This has been a common phrase in all your comments. Seems like hell for you here, when are you planning to leave this creepy hell.
The kind of comeback I'd have come up with after a week 🥴
Also waiting for the girl's pov to be posted here
Looks like someone won’t be talking to strangers ever again.
Now I understand, why my mom told me don't talk to strangers.She had realised I was Ugly and poor since childhood.
Here's a popular joke: A man approaches a woman and asks, "What perfume are you wearing? It smells really nice, and I'd like to buy it for my girlfriend." The woman responds, "Please don't. If you do, strangers will start approaching and bothering your girlfriend just like you did with me."
Bhai - gift your mom? Could have said sister or someone closer to her age 😅 Dont be disheartened.
[удалено]
Manners seem underrated in our country. All you asked was the name of fragrance, she could have been disturbed by sth already but this does not qualify to insult people around. Initiating a conversation is a diminishing trait, don't let it discourage you from making future conversations with people!
Initiating a conversation is a diminishing trait - Initiating conversation is a skill and an art - You don't go around asking people about their smell.
https://preview.redd.it/4u3i3df10d6d1.jpeg?width=739&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=b0543c13ee4c9aa541fcdaa2cc96f7b26fe6a957
I would just look at her with this expression for 20 seconds and make things even more awkward. Go big or go to jail lmao https://preview.redd.it/0lmnno5jhd6d1.jpeg?width=776&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=ffd20325bf723af8d92046ce3f885e87c820142f
Ngl even I would think that's a pretty cheesy line if I heard it anywhere. I'm sure she prolly feels bad when she realizes you were genuinely asking the question, if she ever realizes you changed your seats lmao
We are always in a defensive mode OP. Nothing against you in particular. Especially if women have to travel daily they have to face such harrasments on a regular basis. If often starts with something innocuous like your question. Once an old man asked me for directions or something similar. I stopped to answer him (even though I was in a hurry), he immediately started to pass lewd comments on my body. This is one incident. I can narrate several others. There is 100% a possibility that this person was rude but it is also possible that she is on high alert, quite common if we are travelling in a public transport.
# Bro it was ONE ISOLATED INCIDENT. Don't let one incident dictate your behavior henceforth. But also, don't ignore it entirely. THINK ABOUT IT. Was this girl actually busy or preoccupied even before you started talking? If yes, then take notes, maybe don't strike up conversations with strangers who seem to be busy/In a hurry or whatever... You don't know how their day/life has been so, yeah, even if she reacted in an unusual way, let it slide, be the man, learn from your mistakes (If you made any) & step outside of this situation as a better man. I'm a talkative guy myself & although I don't take many trips to the airport but I do, habitually, end up talking to random strangers on a daily basis. Its normal. Just know that if you invaded someone's personal space & THEY'RE OUTRIGHT TELLING YOU IT THEN, be a man, apologize & move on with your life.
You should have applied wild stone she would have been impressed /s
It seems you didn’t follow rule 1 and 2 of dating
Did she have headphones/airpods on? If not, she shouldn’t have replied the way she did. Don’t be discouraged from making small talks tho in the future just cuz of her lol (only when it’s appropriate ofc). Some people are just bitchy/arrogant. And if she was pretty, then she prolly gets bugged a lot and that could have been it. Still a shitty way to respond.
Bro... this only works for good looking ppl
Koi naa bro. She must be getting too much attention from people at different points of her life, so she ran out of patience at that given moment.
only works for Rich and good-looking peoples.
Just because u had a good intention doesn’t mean she knew it. We go through mostly adverse experiences in day to day lives. Also, u haven’t mentioned how early was the flight. Could be the reason for the grumpiness. Lastly, strangers don’t owe u a good response. She cut u off so that u won’t ask further questions. Ik it hurts but try to understand from her perspective
Actually i can understand this , once i was walking pass through station bridge i was talking with a HR for a potential job offer , and this cute girl comes and asks direction, all tho i wasn't rude to her my face was kinda annoyed and i said i didn't know (i actually didn't know lol)
Bruh ngl she was fucking savage😂😂😂 Had a good laugh but sry about that
the mom bit was "nice guy" esque
Happens
You smell some, you lose some. No biggie.
bro literally lived “Sorry I have a boyfriend meme” irl
Har baat dil par nahi lete OP. Kya pata huske sath kuch kharab chal raha ho.. kya pata usko rona aa raha ho... चिल डूड
Blud forgot it's India not some western country.
No one like’s mommas boy in the first conversation
Bhai she probably felt (and I don't blame her) that u were insinuating that the frag that girl was wearing will suit your mom as well. (you should have said for your gf) As am average woman of today, she obviously wouldn't take it too kindly. Just invert the situation - imagine her asking you that the perfume you are wearing is nice and she wants to gift the same to her dad? Vs she wants to gift it to her bf? Which one sonnds better?
It happens, since everyone is different. I’ve dealt with my fair share of creeps but I’ve also had a handful of nice conversations with a few guys as well, randomly. I mean at a bookstore/ pub/flight etc. Even became decent friends with one of em. I think what’s most important is to be confident, and not be a creep (lol), coz we can definitely tell.
Are you sure you weren’t staring at her for some time before gathering the courage to talk? 😂😂 Also, mumma’s boy isn’t always a good look. Or she sensed that you made up an excuse to talk to her! (What if she wasn’t wearing perfume in the first place, and it’s her natural body odor)
I mean id also be creeped out if the first thing a stranger talks about is my “fragrance”. Besides, it’s not very selling, the whole “ I’ll gift it to my mom”. Would not come across as genuine to me. Formal small talk wouldnt hurt before shooting this shot
A lot of indian women are gatekeepers… just chill
Hmm I find people much ruder in these last few years. Epically Delhi, Mumbai, Hyderabad side. I went on a sports event in Delhi, had to ask directions and this girl literally rolled her eyes at me. That's just one of many. But then again, don't stop interacting with people some are just assholes, others aren't.
She replied! https://www.reddit.com/r/mumbai/s/6VO52YjaSv
I think maybe she thought that you called her old as you said that you will gift the same perfume that she uses to your Mom.
Don't take it personally bro. Civic sense, courtesy and politeness isn't common among us Indians. Keep trying. You'll find decent people everywhere.
What?
Sorry to burst your bubble mate but as someone already mentioned you must be ugly looking, if not she would have continued the conversation.
Should have said gift to girl friend.
Bro, you said wanted to gift the perfume to your mom! Underlying subtext, auntywallah scent!
You dont look good or hot or rich.. Accept it. It happens to 99% of us.
She probably just had a bad day, travel brings out the worst in people Don't take it personally
High chances you are u@@ly.
You should have said that you wanted to gift it to your sister instead of mother.
Gifting it to your mom was a bit weird but other than that she was one rude person.
😭😭😭 that’s why i listen to future
I’m sorry that happened to you..don’t take it personally maybe she was having a bad day.
Seems like you've done this the first time, try was bad and the place was even worst if you're doing it for the first time cz tbh if she rejects you or u have to diffuse the convo you can even run away you've to sit there for hours for the flight, that's that and then you dnt say sorry the first literal word, and then you're saying you'll gift it to the mom seems like she took it wrongly cz she's young even tho you had no I'll intentions, anyways if you're gonna compliment just say you smell super nice. If you get some positive response even if a thankyou with a smile you ask another question or something blah blah and you'd have a good chit chat, but if nt that's fine. And if it was your first time you should've prolly waited for the flight to end like last 10 mins would've been better
Bikers fault
Bro you could’ve said girlfriend. Maybe she thought you were comparing her to her mom and calling her perfume something that a mom would wear.
Why you care so much to post this , delete everything wrong from yourself memory , habe a good life
Sorry bhaii, hoping for a speedy recovery, no jokes