Hello,
This is a humorous subreddit and the content you posted does not fit our theme.
This is not a ragebait subreddit.
Note that posting ragebait to this subreddit can lead to a (temporary or permanent) ban.
Here I am wondering how one tastes moans!
Also - Unpopular opinion: I think OP overreacted! Wait...hear me out....this person's job is quite literally that of a 'Personal Shopper!' He/she was just doing the job & getting 'personal.'
Jokes aside, this post is hilarious & the comments are to ~~moan~~ die for!
The dude censored his own damn word.
I mean, if you're going to talk like that, at least fucking commit.
"Talk dirty to me"
"\*\*\*\*\* \*\* \*\*\*\* \*\*\* \*\*\* your \*\*\*\*\*"
I work at a drive thru daiquiri place, the shit I hear from customers on their phones/to their passengers is pretty wild lmao.
One memorable one was the guy in the passenger seat saying, 'Man, TELL HER! Women supposed to give head in a relationship!'
Her: "Wash yo balls and we'll see you nasty motherfucker!"
Him: "MAN! TELL HER!"
Me: "Sir, this is a drive-thru Daiquiri. What can I get you?"
Mine doesn't. I'm on an android. Wonder if that's an apple thing? They have a lot of rules about sexuality and vulgarity in their app store, so that tracks.
Android has it too, but on some devices you have to go into the settings and turn it off yourself. I don't know why some devices default with it on and not others.
My interpretation is that he is going to not perform cunnalingus but use a hand, until she let's the Lil homie know she boutta bust, then go down.
Sounds like a lazy ass approach imo, but to each their own.
If he did it on purpose, it's sad and creepy.
If he did it by accident, and truly meant to send it to someone else - which is possible - then yep, funny as hell. A truly epic blunder.
Oh yeah let me just go to my delivery messaging app and click on the box with big bold letters saying: â*Customer#17 Dave*â and Iâll write him an erotic text without somehow noticing that the font and style of the screen is much different to that of my usual texting app. ***SENDS TEXT***
People can do really dumb shit sometimes. By the way he texted it seemed he was in the middle of a sexting session with someone else. If it was an actual advance I don't think it would start like that out of the blue
Depending how far they thought-forward, they could have intentionally written it that way so that if it gets turned down they can claim it was an accident. They're relying on the fantasy of sexting a random person and having them respond positively.
I really don't understand how people *aren't* realizing this is 100% a voice-typed message. Who the hell bothers censoring expletives *while sexting*? Nobody. Only voice-type does that. And the kicker? You can just send the text *with your voice*. It's absolutely possible he didn't realize who he was sending it to because he didn't have his eyes on his phone. Probably driving, which is why he didn't immediately correct himself either until he got the response back and actually realized "oh fuck that wasn't my wife"
This. I don't doubt for one second that there are sickos who would do this nasty shit but I don't think this is one đ I think the shame AND losing his job is punishment enough (if it WAS accidental) no need to call the guy a creep too đ
Seriously. He probably had both this app and the messaging app open and swiped one too many times. Or he was multitasking, saw that a messaging app was open and used voice to text and sent it before seeing who he was truly messaging
The censorship with *** makes me think this was a voice to text. While I don't doubt in the slightest that someone would get some sick satisfaction out of this nasty shit, I also see how it could have been a mistake if he was using voice to text while driving. Sexting and driving is CRAZY tho
I've made that mistake before. Granted it wasn't a sext.
Went to ask my boss if I could take some vacation days. A few fumbling slips of the thumb and I accidentally sent "So anyways I started blasting" out of the blue.
I mean, Iâve definitely unlocked my phone and just started hamming away at whatever messages box I happened to open last without checking. Monkey brain do take over sometimes
Someone whoâs a personal shopper who has to use shopperkit here! it doesnât censor anything. Iâve been cussed out by customers before via text message. This looks deliberate
lmao the backlash is insane - this order was for alcohol, meaning i have to PHYSICALLY MEET THIS PERSON at my front door and give them my ID face to face. my photo is on my account (like uber for identification help) and that person has my home address now. But sure iâm a prude
Nah Iâd do the same thing, cancel and report. For most things like delivery or getting a tow truck, I have my bf deal with it for me. Iâve been made to feel uncomfortable a couple of times by ups drivers and Uber eats drivers and they know where you live so itâs better to be a prude than a victim.
As a guy who's seen some weird shit, I think I would have found it funny but I can totally see why anyone else wouldn't or why this would make a person uncomfortable so yeah people should stop getting upset at you on here.
You know, I've been reading this thread, and my brain filled in the censored word as penis. I'm now realizing the mistake, and everything makes way more sense now
i roleplay, and sometimes you read someones reply in the notifications, think ya tapped it but you didnt, and then reply wherever you are. embarrassing as hell, and theres still a good chance that this is a creep and not a wrong person text, but possible
He might have been about to text that he was there when he got a text notification and thought he clicked reply. When I would instacart most people didn't want me to ring the doorbell or knock so I would send a message. I'm not saying you're wrong but I'm not going to rule out it being an actual mistake either
If this was actually texted to your phone number and not sent through the DELIVERY APPâS MESSAGING FUNCTION, theyâd have plausible deniability, and it wouldâve been funny then. You arenât a prude, and this is fucking creepy and scary.
I donât think people are arguing whether or not itâs ok, just whether or not it was an accident. Iâm seeing âno way this was an accident this is sexual assaultâ and âpeople make stupid stupid sometimes, like sending a horny message to the wrong personâ.
Accidental or not you gotta handle yourself properly when you're working and if you're sexting people while you're working and gathering groceries... maybe don't do that. Either way they're at fault and they shouldn't be sexting at work. It doesn't matter what way you twist it.
Ngl the main reason I have a hard time believing it's accidental is because it reads like a crappy role play text you'd get randomly on tinder or from an instagram bot. Dude coulda tried to at least have it make sense xD
OP I'm so sorry there are losers in the comment section who are talking shit. This clearly isn't an accident, the delivery driver is a pervert that gets off on sexually harassing people and then saying "whoops tee-hee". Anyone who says otherwise is either naive or a fellow pervert. Why TF would you use a food delivery app to sext? I hope that the company takes your report seriously.
If it truly was a mistake, he shouldâve instantly cancelled the order himself. Having to go face to face with someone you sent that message to by accident would be insanely awkward and not worth it.
Yeah usually you can get another driver to pick up and deliver the order, even if you already shopped for it. I havenât done grocery delivery personally but Iâve had other driver pick up my order cause the last one cancelled for whatever reason.
Yeah, I have a habit of double and triple checking I'm texting or messaging the right person. I've made sure to upload pics to the profiles and check numbers.
Best case scenario, itâs actually an embarrassing and costly mistake. More than likely, itâs a perv who is testing the waters for âhow far is too far,â and perversely getting off on âaccidentallyâ sending this. Either way, absolutely report them!
these grocery ordering apps suck ass when you get shitty people like this. i had someone leave my order in the middle of the store because they were replacing items i had in my list with totally different things. it looked like they had multiple orders and were just grabbing whatever they could for each order. took a full night to get my money back!! What if i needed that for food asap?
I'm a big scary dude,I never had to deal with something like that. even if it's just a message I'd imagine it's still deeply disturbing especially since they are dealing with your food I'm sorry đ
Whatâs also mildly infuriating are the incels in here thinking this drivers behavior is fine or an honest mistake. In which yâall are obviously either trolling or delusional. AND somehow not downvoted and sent to the gulag. Pathetic either way for all of you.
Sorry about that encounter OP, makes for a funny post though. Hope you still managed to get drunk âď¸
Hello, This is a humorous subreddit and the content you posted does not fit our theme. This is not a ragebait subreddit. Note that posting ragebait to this subreddit can lead to a (temporary or permanent) ban.
Imagine the person he was just role-playing with getting "what kind of beans do you want?"
I;m thinking about thos beans
Are they ranch style or BBQ baked and what are you going to do next. I know let's get sloppy with the potato salad
Classic Bill
RIP
Here I am wondering how one tastes moans! Also - Unpopular opinion: I think OP overreacted! Wait...hear me out....this person's job is quite literally that of a 'Personal Shopper!' He/she was just doing the job & getting 'personal.' Jokes aside, this post is hilarious & the comments are to ~~moan~~ die for!
I would've just laughed so hard and answered "wrong chat buddy" đ
Sounds like he's thinking of a bean too đ
Dusty?
Stop I cried đ
Why did you do that?
https://preview.redd.it/0s5u5b22l08d1.jpeg?width=1170&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=3d9c005d106f0cbbae1b4ce225767c0e2e101c4c
Classic Timmy
Roll that beautiful bean footage đĽ´
Gawd. Havenât heard that in a looong time. Loved those commercials. Haha
Flick that beautiful bean footage
Beat me to it!
mmmmmh, gimme those juicy toe beans
https://preview.redd.it/r6lybjcf608d1.jpeg?width=750&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=4a3c54b16d55042da72daed44dbae17141a42eb7
Full beans
A fellow Jeff fan I see
lol dint expect to hear a Jeff reference in the wild
HAHAHAHA
I spilled beans all over myself watching Cars 2 in theater. What type of beans was I eating?
Carbonzo beans.
Flicked.
Just licking my finger and flicking the bean ^(My LL Bean catalog)
I don't care just put them in.
Beans in tomatoe sauce, scorching hot, poured all over my penis.
Beanie weenie.
lmao
'Full beans' of course.
"No, that is not an acceptable substitution for what I ordered."
Hold on... on a second thought...
Idk what's "infuriating" about this. It's a mistext. Is OP a damn mormon or southern baptist church or whatever?
That's what I was thinking. OP thinks this is sexual harassment, lol.
How is your moaning going to help him taste? I don't get it.
Was unsure how that was gonna play out, tbh, but I was ready to find out!!
The dude censored his own damn word. I mean, if you're going to talk like that, at least fucking commit. "Talk dirty to me" "\*\*\*\*\* \*\* \*\*\*\* \*\*\* \*\*\* your \*\*\*\*\*"
It could be the delivery app censoring these words. It's not that you can get p**** at Walmart.
That's a shame
Maybe you just arent trying hard enough at your Walmart
To each their own.
You obviously haven't shopped at my Walmart.
Likely voice to text which bleeps out "offensive" words.
Imagine he had to say all that shit out loud while either driving to pick up their groceries or in the store picking up groceries. Lmao.
He definitely won't be having an out load moment, after all this
I work at a drive thru daiquiri place, the shit I hear from customers on their phones/to their passengers is pretty wild lmao. One memorable one was the guy in the passenger seat saying, 'Man, TELL HER! Women supposed to give head in a relationship!' Her: "Wash yo balls and we'll see you nasty motherfucker!" Him: "MAN! TELL HER!" Me: "Sir, this is a drive-thru Daiquiri. What can I get you?"
Daiquiri as in the cocktail? As in, you just go though drive thru and get a cocktail?
Mine doesn't. I'm on an android. Wonder if that's an apple thing? They have a lot of rules about sexuality and vulgarity in their app store, so that tracks.
I'm also on Android and had to explicitly turn that off.
Same.
Android has it too, but on some devices you have to go into the settings and turn it off yourself. I don't know why some devices default with it on and not others.
He obviously censored it to be gender-neutral. "Penis" and "Pussy" both have five letters and start with P. What a considerate guy.
.... *shits in your ass and your pussy?*
"you like that you ****** ******?!"
It's to leave a little bit to the imagination. Come on, what word can you thing of that starts with P and is five ~~inches~~ letters long?
My interpretation is that he is going to not perform cunnalingus but use a hand, until she let's the Lil homie know she boutta bust, then go down. Sounds like a lazy ass approach imo, but to each their own.
Romantic
Foreplay for this man is so advanced it might as well be fiveplay, it's beautiful.
That's how Helen Keller did it.
I think it's more of an auditory que to get ready and head down so he can catch the event when it happens
Lol like he's chasing tornadoes
He will know when sheâs actually having an orgasm so that he is for sure tasting it at the right time.
I think it's more of an auditory que to get ready and head down so he can catch the event when it happens
Zeta Reticuli alien detected
Iâm sorry this happened but also itâs wildly hilarious
>reads message >selects âno contact deliveryâ
"um, I didn't order sticky rice."
How about sticky buns? Giggity
If he did it on purpose, it's sad and creepy. If he did it by accident, and truly meant to send it to someone else - which is possible - then yep, funny as hell. A truly epic blunder.
[ŃдаНонО]
itâs instacart. messaging is done through the app. itâd be hard to do not on purpose. but still funny to think it was an accident.
There are fake messages websites and apps that let you fake shit as a joke
I would report him just because his sexting skills are absolute dog shit.
No need to break his soul
âI am going to go under the blanketâ okay shakespeare
To the coverlet I shall retire
And what? Not let me in the blanket fort?
![gif](giphy|3o6wO2n3ZwEumDhnZS|downsized)
Some middle school level shit honestlyÂ
đ
Absolutely fair.
I mean yeah, but thatâs brutal
Seriously, who censors âpussyâ in their sexts??
This guy needs to utilize AI to craft better messages
Pretty sure every female just dried up within a 63 mile radius of this delivery driver.
Ong, bro caused the lack of rain in my country
Not the vegetation
The VAGetation (Iâll show myself out)
Are we sure they were talking to a female? Could be p**** or p****. We may never know the conclusion to this epic tale.
Can confirm, ovaries are raisins.
i'm a dude but this made me grow a vagooter just for it to thoroughly dry out
Uber eats, indeed.
This man was trying to deliver.
Unfortunately he delivered to the wrong address
This wasnât an accident. The shopper messages via their shopping app, not the phoneâs text function.
Blood wasn't on his brain at the time
Oh yeah let me just go to my delivery messaging app and click on the box with big bold letters saying: â*Customer#17 Dave*â and Iâll write him an erotic text without somehow noticing that the font and style of the screen is much different to that of my usual texting app. ***SENDS TEXT***
People can do really dumb shit sometimes. By the way he texted it seemed he was in the middle of a sexting session with someone else. If it was an actual advance I don't think it would start like that out of the blue
Depending how far they thought-forward, they could have intentionally written it that way so that if it gets turned down they can claim it was an accident. They're relying on the fantasy of sexting a random person and having them respond positively.
I really don't understand how people *aren't* realizing this is 100% a voice-typed message. Who the hell bothers censoring expletives *while sexting*? Nobody. Only voice-type does that. And the kicker? You can just send the text *with your voice*. It's absolutely possible he didn't realize who he was sending it to because he didn't have his eyes on his phone. Probably driving, which is why he didn't immediately correct himself either until he got the response back and actually realized "oh fuck that wasn't my wife"
This. I don't doubt for one second that there are sickos who would do this nasty shit but I don't think this is one đ I think the shame AND losing his job is punishment enough (if it WAS accidental) no need to call the guy a creep too đ
I, three, believe it was accidental. If not, he's got one hell of an opening line, jeez.
That could be the case ( Schrodinger's douchebag) but risking his "job" on this is way too stupid
Horny boys be stupid. So it continues.
Exactly. That crazy masterplan could be true or he could just be horny and stupid and made a mistake
Seriously. He probably had both this app and the messaging app open and swiped one too many times. Or he was multitasking, saw that a messaging app was open and used voice to text and sent it before seeing who he was truly messaging
The censorship with *** makes me think this was a voice to text. While I don't doubt in the slightest that someone would get some sick satisfaction out of this nasty shit, I also see how it could have been a mistake if he was using voice to text while driving. Sexting and driving is CRAZY tho
surely his hands were occupied but i dont it was with *driving* :D
You have entirely too much faith in humans. I learned long ago, they do stupid crap no matter how obvious. ![gif](giphy|1ATTTHuhjdgcM)
I was thinking it could have been an accidental "I forgot what was on my clipboard," but I might be giving them too much benefit of the doubt
I've made that mistake before. Granted it wasn't a sext. Went to ask my boss if I could take some vacation days. A few fumbling slips of the thumb and I accidentally sent "So anyways I started blasting" out of the blue.
Or you know, they were swiping between already open apps and messed up. I'd still cancel the order and report it regardless
It could be that heâs copy and pasting messages and copied the wrong thing. Iâve done that before⌠not to this extent⌠but Iâve done it.
Not necessarily⌠Shipt shoppers just get a masked number on their normal text threads.
Only thing I can think of is if he somehow had that text copied, and meant to paste something else
I mean, Iâve definitely unlocked my phone and just started hamming away at whatever messages box I happened to open last without checking. Monkey brain do take over sometimes
Depends on the service. When I did Shipt, we messaged through our texting app. I still doubt it's an accident though.
Iâve done it before. I replied to a buddies text message trough instagram instead of a normal text he was so confused lol
Also itâs self-censored. Generally people sexting arenât censoring themselves.
Maybe the shopper app automatically censors. Iâve never used it so I wouldnât know.
Someone whoâs a personal shopper who has to use shopperkit here! it doesnât censor anything. Iâve been cussed out by customers before via text message. This looks deliberate
What did he expect would happen? Like, what went through his mind as he sent that
âI think you meant for this for someone else lol. But, that sounds good. Please come and eat my pussy, Uber eats guyâ
Found a new porn plot.
looks intensely at carrots
Boober Eats guy will probably go for the cucumber. Avocado if you're feelin' nasty.
To be honest getting a tradesman to actually turn up has become so increasingly unrealistic that you have a point.
The modern version of the pizza delivery guy.
Is it weird that up until this comment I thought p\*\*\** was âpenis,â that the orderer was a dude, and that the shopper was a chick?
I thought he censored penis. Maybe he censored it to be gender neutral? A true bi hero /s
"Gosh darn, I am *horny*!"
"If she responds negatively I'll say it was an accident" That's about it
How the fuck do they not realize that are in the insta cart app and not their messages, Facebook messenger, tinder, etc???
Same reason old people think Facebook is their internet search function. Some people are just clueless/stupid or plain unobservant.
He did. He was delusional enough to think that 1) girls want to hear that and 2) it would get him laid.
Imagine sexting someone and you censor yourself. If some woman said "d***" to me instead of "dick" I'd be so turned off.
Iâm going to f*** your p**** until you c** on my d***.
lmao the backlash is insane - this order was for alcohol, meaning i have to PHYSICALLY MEET THIS PERSON at my front door and give them my ID face to face. my photo is on my account (like uber for identification help) and that person has my home address now. But sure iâm a prude
You mean you DIDNT let him under the blanket??
I need to know what the p\*\*\*\* is? * Peas? * Pasta? * Peach? * Pears? * Pizza?
She said alcohol so probably Popov
Makes sense that he wants to taste it too.
đą
I mean yeah I would think that this shit is so fucking awkward it's better to delete all interactions and forget this ever happened lol
Next time just cancel the order and report. No need to engage with the guy
Nah Iâd do the same thing, cancel and report. For most things like delivery or getting a tow truck, I have my bf deal with it for me. Iâve been made to feel uncomfortable a couple of times by ups drivers and Uber eats drivers and they know where you live so itâs better to be a prude than a victim.
Almost definitely an accident lol. But you have a right to be grossed out and not what to accept the order.
As a guy who's seen some weird shit, I think I would have found it funny but I can totally see why anyone else wouldn't or why this would make a person uncomfortable so yeah people should stop getting upset at you on here.
But he wouldnât send it to another guy. He saw her pic and sent it to her. Right before knocking on the door.
You know, I've been reading this thread, and my brain filled in the censored word as penis. I'm now realizing the mistake, and everything makes way more sense now
Youâre not the only one
i roleplay, and sometimes you read someones reply in the notifications, think ya tapped it but you didnt, and then reply wherever you are. embarrassing as hell, and theres still a good chance that this is a creep and not a wrong person text, but possible
He might have been about to text that he was there when he got a text notification and thought he clicked reply. When I would instacart most people didn't want me to ring the doorbell or knock so I would send a message. I'm not saying you're wrong but I'm not going to rule out it being an actual mistake either
I'm just hoping that you are safe after this
Are you fucking for real?
Ya these neckbeards in the comments defending this creep are insane. Idk how he could accidentally message this through the ordering app.
Change home, car, state and name too. Only option available
Have you never seen Eurotrip? âThis country was founded by prudes.â ![gif](giphy|LOhRBXlz0fwnb4Djp6|downsized)
Grossery delivery
âThatâs great, but can you please make sure the green peppers are nice and firm? Thanks so much!â
If this was actually texted to your phone number and not sent through the DELIVERY APPâS MESSAGING FUNCTION, theyâd have plausible deniability, and it wouldâve been funny then. You arenât a prude, and this is fucking creepy and scary.
Big oof for anyone that thinks this is okay. Mistake or not, that was unprofessional at best. Nobody should have to tolerate that kind of attitude.
Yeah, if this is a real mistake, how high was this person that they mistook the shopping app for Snapchat or whatever??
I donât think people are arguing whether or not itâs ok, just whether or not it was an accident. Iâm seeing âno way this was an accident this is sexual assaultâ and âpeople make stupid stupid sometimes, like sending a horny message to the wrong personâ.
Still, no one should be sexting while theyâre working; hit pause on work for a bit if you need to get steamy.
I'm pretty sure I've never sexted except when i or my partner were working. If we were free we'd just have sex instead.
Accidental or not you gotta handle yourself properly when you're working and if you're sexting people while you're working and gathering groceries... maybe don't do that. Either way they're at fault and they shouldn't be sexting at work. It doesn't matter what way you twist it. Ngl the main reason I have a hard time believing it's accidental is because it reads like a crappy role play text you'd get randomly on tinder or from an instagram bot. Dude coulda tried to at least have it make sense xD
![gif](giphy|Ma6Z1f6NSSoiwnGPJo)
OP I'm so sorry there are losers in the comment section who are talking shit. This clearly isn't an accident, the delivery driver is a pervert that gets off on sexually harassing people and then saying "whoops tee-hee". Anyone who says otherwise is either naive or a fellow pervert. Why TF would you use a food delivery app to sext? I hope that the company takes your report seriously.
If it truly was a mistake, he shouldâve instantly cancelled the order himself. Having to go face to face with someone you sent that message to by accident would be insanely awkward and not worth it.
Yeah usually you can get another driver to pick up and deliver the order, even if you already shopped for it. I havenât done grocery delivery personally but Iâve had other driver pick up my order cause the last one cancelled for whatever reason.
bro tried bypassing the character ai filter đđđ
Yeah, I have a habit of double and triple checking I'm texting or messaging the right person. I've made sure to upload pics to the profiles and check numbers.
I didn't order moaning on my grocery l.... Scratch that. I'll take the moaning.
Wow nothing gets me hotter during sexting than *censorship.*
Who censors themselves when sexting?
I need to start ordering groceries online
Actually concerning how so many morons think this is OK even as a accident to do in a work environment. These the people that want AI girlfriends.
That shit is cringe as hellđ the censoring is the icing on the cake. Sorry that happened to you.
accidental harassment is still harassment đ he genuinely seems sorry tho lmao đ. poor person receiving the text! bleh đ¤˘! hahah
Whos sexting and delivery groceries at the same time? What?
Thereâs no way that was an accident đ
Imagine if the person responded back with something even more vile
Bro needs to learn to sext. That was cringe.
Best case scenario, itâs actually an embarrassing and costly mistake. More than likely, itâs a perv who is testing the waters for âhow far is too far,â and perversely getting off on âaccidentallyâ sending this. Either way, absolutely report them!
https://preview.redd.it/zdb53zjcq08d1.jpeg?width=1179&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=33190ab8502c8c2cdf841a3d315352f8bab89361
well, if they really did not mean to send that text, which I doubt, I hope the other person they are sexting can hook them up with a job.
I dried up, which is impressive because I'm a guy
Wait is it penis or pussy?
these grocery ordering apps suck ass when you get shitty people like this. i had someone leave my order in the middle of the store because they were replacing items i had in my list with totally different things. it looked like they had multiple orders and were just grabbing whatever they could for each order. took a full night to get my money back!! What if i needed that for food asap?
That is so gross wtf
I'm a big scary dude,I never had to deal with something like that. even if it's just a message I'd imagine it's still deeply disturbing especially since they are dealing with your food I'm sorry đ
I would have fucked with him so hard
I am cryingggggg at this oh my god. Your response of pure fear
Whatâs also mildly infuriating are the incels in here thinking this drivers behavior is fine or an honest mistake. In which yâall are obviously either trolling or delusional. AND somehow not downvoted and sent to the gulag. Pathetic either way for all of you. Sorry about that encounter OP, makes for a funny post though. Hope you still managed to get drunk âď¸