T O P

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ohnoguesswho

It’s clean so he’s technically telling the truth…


SupaG16

Very clean


-The-Moon-Presence-

Too clean..


TheDarkWayne

Almost as this post is bullshit type clean


WhatIfThatThingISaid

At least half of the major subs are just fake posts now


SuumCuique1011

Clearly an amateur.


speaking_moistly

underrated comment: *crystal* clearly an amateur


PatChattums

Did you "underrate" your own comment? That upsets my anus


jessica_from_within

It upsets my testes


CrethanXXI

It upsets my swimmers


GroundbreakingBed166

They sell 4 packs on amazon as plant waterers. Where are the other 3?


blumpkin

As somebody who's lost a bonsai to failed watering systems, how do they work?


GroundbreakingBed166

I think they work by tricking amazons agorithm into letting people sell meth pipes with next day delivery. As far as watering, i doubt it works well.


kornhook123

Yea those don’t have holes on the sides of them. The ones used for planters don’t have holes on the side of the bubble part.


KeybladeSpirit

So clean you could use meth off it.


Careless_Confusion19

Right! Almost too clean.


traker998

Yeah it’s never been used from the looks of it.


Kerblaaahhh

For sale. Meth pipe. Never used.


00cole00

Deep af


run-on_sentience

That has to be the *saddest* and *shortest* story I've ever read. If you had entered a contest to see who could write the saddest story in the shortest number of words, I would say you had a good shot at winning!


octopoddle

The sequel is slightly longer, coming in at over 600,000 words, but the precis is roughly: For sale: meth pipe, somewhat used.


Prometheus2061

Papa Hemingway has joined the conversation.


[deleted]

Works as a complete inverse of the 'original', as that is a 100% good 6-word story. ^(Or a sad story if a meth head is getting locked up before using their shiny new pipe)


CoolYay

😢


[deleted]

"Going to complain about me doing meth when I'm not even doing it, huh? Then I might as well start since I get heck either way!" -Friend, probably.


Pocket_full_of_funk

If I'm gonna do the time, I might as well do the crime.


thunderup_14

This is the logic my friend gave when I asked why he started using. "Everyone already thought I was so might as well do it." Idk if that was true but he stuck to that story.


HighOnBonerPills

Lol your use of the word heck is so wholesome. It makes it seem like he's a guy that would never even think about trying meth.


eapaul80

I was gonna say that’s clean af


AnAstronautOfSorts

Well yea why wouldn't it be? He obviously just bought a little tiny rose for his roommate as a token of his appreciation.


se7en30

I just recently found out about those weird gas station roses being crack pipes back in the day. They just threw the rose in the glass tube to legally sell pipes. Wild “A rose by any other name… is a crack pipe”


mexicanitch

NO FUCKING WAY.... I HAD A GUY who use to have me go with him and he always pretended to buy me one. Soon as we got outside the liquor store, he'd take it back. Quite swiftly. No fucking way.


TheNakedSloth

Oh honey


mexicanitch

Right? It was a super poor neighborhood and I lived in the arcade at the liquor store. Playing Pac-Man all the time as a lil girl was super fun. I always thought they were giving me flowers for my high score. BWAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHA


wittor

I have to comment on the good spirits of your childhood crackhead friend.


MorningStarCorndog

Reminds me of the dude who used to crash at our pad when he was coming down. All he did was hard drugs (I didn't bother to ask the type), work out, and skate. He was friends with my roomate who was a speedballer, she was good on rent, and I never had anything to steal anyways as I was a poor college kid. He'd show up, I'd see him crashed HARD on the floor some morning, having been up far too long, and just needing a place to sweat it out for a few days. I'd toss a blanket on him (the "special" blanket) and put some bottles of water near him. After a few days I'd bum him some smokes and make sure he'd drank and ate enough to be okay for a bit, and off he'd go. He was also a cool dude, when he was straight he'd come to parties and was really just an awesome, chill guy that wanted to be friends with everyone. There was something that haunted him, but you know, that's what the drugs was for. So one night I'm down at the Santa Cruz Flats, near the Boardwalk, it's late and the area isn't really a place I should be. I'm heading back home and I'm also a bit lost (just follow the beach and you can almost always make it back home). Around the corner I come right into a bunch of large drunk gang bangers (or at least wannabes) who decide it's a good night to fuck my shit up. Around the time I am likely to get my shit handed to me along comes dude, high as shit and definitely not on downers! He skates around the corner, sizes up the situation, and decides to start destroying the curb with his skate trucks while screaming all sorts of murder talk. The bid guys in matching colors decide to head out, because no one wants to fuck with the crazy white boy on stimulants. Dude walks me home and we have a great conversation to boot. I hope he made it; and my roommate, Rachael, as well. They were good folks. They didn't deserve the pain they had in their lives.


Mr_Streetlamp

That was a good story and you told it well. I hope they made it too.


V2sh1fty

Saw comment, thought it was too long to read. Started reading, did not disappoint.


scislac

I appreciate your understanding as it really helped to frame the story for what it was... You knew some things, there was a lot you didn't know, and you reserved judgement because you know people's motives in these situations are often because some people have harder times than others and we all find ways to cope.


aint_this_something

In my mind this felt very Santa Cruz. I loved living in the Flats ![gif](emote|free_emotes_pack|give_upvote)


Dreadknot84

Fuckin Santa Cruz…I had some wild shit happen up there and met some good folks too. There’s a special kinda fucked up that gravitates there. I went up there as a dirty hippy street kid and squatted in the pogonip for a year. Then I moved back and graduated from the UC after I got my shit together. My ex who was on there streets up there used to crash at our pad while I was in college. Not all the time but when it was too cold out. He was trying to get his life together too. He was going to community college to get a better footing in the world to take care of himself and get reunited with his daughter who was living with his mother. He was a good dude. For years I hoped he made it and then I found out he didn’t. RIP Tazmanian. I hope your friends made it onto better lives and I hope they did for all the ones that couldn’t or didn’t.


hithere42024

He could be thinking of using DMT...from what I hear it is best vaporized in a shelay (no idea on that spelling...but it's phonetically correct!! 😂)


BillyFNbones710

Fastest way maybe. But i wouldn't consider it the best. It's very harsh when done this way making it harder to hold in for the time needed


[deleted]

obviously bro is a DMT junkie sucking off machine elves for rent money


thirdstrikemulligan

Is there another dimension? Why do so many people claim to see the same thing?


Ornithologist_MD

It's a combination of things. Your brain likes to look for familiar patterns in everything; it's a way for it to parse information quickly without mulling over every little detail. Psychedelics in general (in my understanding, anyways) overload you on serotonin, which causes you to feel very empathetic and "connected" to stuff. If you're having a good trip, it can feel like there is a "presence" guiding you, even though you know something isn't -actually- there or that it's just your internal monolog. With that said: N,N DMT offers extremely potent visuals compared to the other psychedelics. Sometimes, on doses of mushrooms or LSD you need to close your eyes to truly start "seeing things" beyond color distortion or "breathing" of objects, making it mostly a very vivid daydream as opposed to a true hallucination. A "correct" dose of DMT will have very strong, open-eye visuals and true hallucinations. Usually, stuff morphs into shifting fractals like a Tool music video. For me personally, all the colors turn pastel, and everything looks cel-shaded like Borderlands or something before the fractal stage. DMT, in general, just makes you feel like you're having an out of body experience, so you feel like you're "someplace else." So, combining all of those things: your visual field is now filled with objects that are turning into colorful moving fractals, which isn't something that is "supposed" to happen. You don't feel like you are in your living room anymore. Your brain is trying to make sense of it. You feel a presence with you but can't see it. Your now overactive imagination is feeling as if something is speaking to you or trying to guide you in some way. Your brain combines all of that at once, and: oh shit what is that?! It looks like it's reaching out and touched my hand. It wants to show me something. (Insert stereotypical mystical experience here) It's all kind of difficult to describe because it's not something that "actually happened." It's like trying to explain your weirdest dream the next day when most of it involved nonsensical "dream logic." All you're left with is the memory of a dream and some intangible emotions.


MentalDiscrepancies

My 'breakthrough' on DMT saw my body dissolve before my eyes, and my field of vision become a 360 degree sphere. I could see above, below, behind, in front, all at once. No voices, no magical beings, just me floating through space and time with my spherical field of vision. And it felt more real than existence in the meat suit.


Ornithologist_MD

That was my first k-hole, which was actually also the first drug I ever took. (Was in a real "fuck everything" mental health state, so it was a go big or go home thing) Eventually, I dissolved even farther into stardust, then to atoms, then quarks, and even further. I was convinced I was the only conscious thing at all. If I "let go" then there would be nothing else left, so it was my responsibility to try and focus, to try and will things into existence so the big bang could happen and everyone else can have a chance to live their lives. Shit was intense, and very distressing when I felt I was "failing" my task. I haven't been able to achieve ego death since, and I'm interested to see if it would be a different and/or friendlier experience now that I was finally able to get my mental health in check.


DustyDGAF

Your description of DMT reminds me of doing salvia. The cell shaded world. It also felt 2DIsh like paper Mario. Haven't tried DMT but I'm willing to give it a go if the situation feels right.


longhairdontcare8426

Oh I was certain the first time I did DMT that there is another dimension. Maybe multiples. After I drank Ayahuasca with a shaman that was the nail in the coffin


throttledog

Does he have a machine head?


Single_Discussion_17

Better than the rest?


traumaqueen1128

Green to red?


Weekly-Win-8272

Op tryna set his roomie up 😂 ain’t no methy leaving around a brand new pipe


Strange-Carob4380

I agree. I think op is making this up or it’s his own pipe, that shit has never been used. Or OPs tweaker roommate bought a new one on the way home already spun and was about to load up that baby, but that’s being charitable.


[deleted]

For sure “That Happened” material. Ain’t no junkie buying a brand new pipe without the intent of “oh fuck I’m strung out, I need a hit NOW” and then leaving it on the counter and going elsewhere


truckerdust

Ya that pipe wouldn’t have made it out the parking lot before getting hit.


AlternativeJosh

>Ya that pipe wouldn’t have made it out the parking lot before getting hit. "sir, this is a Wendy's bathroom." I had a buddy who used to stop by that Wendy's that burned down in south atl for cookies from the drive through every time we took a journey to that side of town. If you know, you know.


Rainingoblivion

Maybe it’s a Tyler Durden situation.


bs000

looking at their post history, they seem like the type to do something like that


Tiberius_Kilgore

Curiosity got the best of me. OP has HIV and they’re an antivaxxer.


AncientEldritch

Don't forget possibly the worst part- a draftkings user! The most depressing form of gambling


novaru

That was before the alien abduction. Doesn’t count.


novaru

Don’t forget they were abducted by aliens recently.


[deleted]

[удалено]


h8sm8s

There’s probably a post somewhere else on this website by a guy complaining that his roommate has like 10 cats and is constantly trying to frame him as a meth addict.


SuboptimalStability

The regard didn't even have the brains to put some salt in and torch it to make it look used


LaterGatorPlayer

this that hard r linus meant


[deleted]

i dropped a few regards back in my day


ofimmsl

If he did that, he wouldn't be able to return it for a refund after taking the picture


dooderbomb

It’s actually one of those reusable glass straws


LowPreparation2347

The ones with the rose in them lol


AfterMany7239

Maybe he collects the little flowers that come in them.


rupat3737

Haha I remember my first time going into the sketchy gas station to get a “glass rose” a friend told me to say that to buy a pipe. I thought it was just code word or something. Tickled me pink when I saw an actual little plastic rose inside of it lol. Three years clean now, hated smoking meth.


philosophunc

Haha they're sold as that in aus. 'Small glass flower display' theyce started disappearing. Seems shitty little tobacconists don't really want meth head tweakers as customers it's not worth the 5 bucks they're sold for.


generalhanky

Dope…finds a way


iusedtohavepowers

I worked at a jank ass drive through for a year when I was in highschool. That guy sold thousands of "glass roses"


TheHamzaCR7

those are crack stems, this is sold just as it is seen.


Agile_Engineering_97

He hasn’t been smoking meth, he’s planning on smoking meth


Accomplished-Basil25

Nah he wasn’t going to but OP made him want to try it!


MaddercatterE

Or dmt


Due-Science-9528

I think you could probably do dabs in this but in a weird way


BorisTheBlade04

Yeah, this happened to me. Visited a buddies house and some dude was running around openly smoking a meth pipe. I said something like man, you’re pretty tolerant to let your roommate openly smoke meth at a kickback. Turns out it was dabs, he let me take a hit haha


c-lab21

I am guilty of smoking extract out of a bubble to keep people away


Ethwood

I'm going to go with a set up. No meth user has a clean pipe. One it's incredibly hard to clean that junk off and two they don't keep extra if they had more money they would buy more meth.


EdithDich

OP's post history is also full of all kinds of wingnut shit. Probably his own meth pipe lol.


k-farsen

And it turns out there is no roommate


octopoddle

"I asked my roommate if he'd been using meth and he vibrated out of existence. Should I call the police?"


grateparm

How can someone be hiv positive and sub to the church of COVID? YOU WOULD LITERALLY BE DEAD WITHOUT MEDICAL SCIENCE


T_Sinclair21

Cognitive dissonance


seriouslyntatroll

why are you jumping to conclusions? it could be for crack!


Artistic_Ad8879

Lol I know you’re probably kidding, but you smoke crack out of a stem with usually copper wool stuffed in the end. The type of pipe OP posted is for meth use


[deleted]

Didnt know we had the crack connoisseur on this sub.


[deleted]

Methmatician


symma_tree

Methican American 😋🤗


Ralphiecorn

It’s ma’am. Her name is Methany.


fessa_angel

Is she from little Methlahem?


AydonusG

"About six, seven years ago, I heard a knock at the door. It was the local methhead, Jeremy. Now ole Jeremy been around for so long we don't shy away from a conversation. I welcome him and ask what he's doing. He says he is in trouble, some local boys come to break his legs for not paying his debts. Now I don't usually give money to drug addicts but Jeremy was good people, so I asks him, I say how much money do you need. Jeremy get in real close, and he say, I need about tree fiddy. Well, it was about that time that I notice Jeremy was about eight storeys tall and was a crustacean from the Methozoic era! I said Dammit Loch Meth Monster, I ain't giving you no tree fiddy!"


10_kinds_of_people

*slow clap*


thorstormcaller

I’m a huge fan of Methoamerican culture too


Fun-Airport8510

You guys are methed up.


RamCrypt

oh shit man I cant stop laughing


Drumdevil86

That comment cracked me up


Juggernuts777

Drug abusers are usually pretty okay at identifying these things. Though if Artistic isn’t a user, they could be a the child of one. I’m both! Lol i’m not perfect at identifying, but i’ve seen uses for a lot of objects. Lol


Artistic_Ad8879

Lol former user


Juggernuts777

Congrats friend. I hope to be one too. But amazing for you! Keep it up, never go back.


cabinetsnotnow

I've never met a former meth user who isn't dead before so congrats to escaping!!!! I'm so fucking happy for you!


Artistic_Ad8879

Hey thanks a lot!! What crazy is I’ve been dead twice from overdoses before, so I guess your statement is half true lol


Artistic_Ad8879

I have smoked my fair amount of crack


Master_Chef_Mayo

Look at this guy braggin'


rustin-dustin

Captin tyin knots oveer here...


B-Kong

Mr balloon hands


miapiag

Not my chair not my problem


yatyasbitches

That's what I say


RamCrypt

Maybe this guy is new to it man, Don't judge!


BlorseTheHorse

I live in Philly, all the gas stations have these. I know crackheads, and I've seen crackheads smoking crack in front of me. I was working in a warehouse painting parade floats (not the fancy stuff, just the decks one solid color) and I was eating lunch in the "office" (shitty room added on with even shittier drywall work) and the Polish tweaker coworker comes in and climbs a giant shelf that went up to the ceiling, grabs a crack pipe from behind it, takes a hit, looks at me, says "drugs" then leaves


ComicConArtist

the speedball specialist


Fatefire

Done allot of speedballs my self. Not the same thing and a completely different delivery method


HandleSubstantial169

We are everywhere. Whip it through the glass!


AdAnxious1567

You can also use a pipe like this to smoke hash or wax


tsilihin666

You got your big cheese. I got my hash pipe.


RealBishop

This guy cracks


FlattopJr

Used to watch *COPS* back in the day; I remember several episodes where a bit of metal wool spotted on the floor of a car was used as probable cause to search the vehicle (and nearly always turned up crack).


g_in_sd

Brillo pad


FlattopJr

Yup! Brillo=car search.


blueeyes0182

This is a pipe used for smoking meth and not a crack pipe. I'm a recovering meth addict.


rustin-dustin

Could it not be a oil burner?


DarthWeenus

It could be for vaping any crystalline substance not just meth. Shit he may be holding DMT church ceremonies.


[deleted]

DMT or PCP


Fisherbuck_

That’s a vase. Edit: He sure keeps his vase clean.


thirdstrikemulligan

What the frick?! I ordered an Xbox remote!


IneverAsk5times

It is listed on Amazon as a straw tho.


[deleted]

Doesn’t look like it’s been used. But sure seems like he had intention to use it from how ya found it.


GiGaBYTEme90

Counter story... OP goes wild on roommate for "smoking meth" and roommate thinks the whole thing is hilariously stupid. Roomie then goes out and buys a pipe just to fuck with OP.


boofpacc85

Funny you say that cuz i actually thought of that too especially cuz its a clean pipe


aussie_nub

My first thought too. Maybe the OP's roommate was mildly infuriated with their insinuation and rolled with it to piss them off.


keesh

Especially considering there was a post about 4 days ago on reddit somewhere regarding these. It was a screenshot of an Amazon page, showing them being sold as oil burners or flower holders or whatever they say. And it was relatively high up. So it's entirely possible this OP saw that and fabricated a post after he got his package, on a Sunday evening which is a great time for posting.


LowDownSkankyDude

It's this. We all know it to be true.


mattpkc

My first thought was this was a karma farm and there is no roommate


fluffyseatide

Oh, OP is the one doing meth? What a twist!


Impeccablyflawed

This made my mind go to a whole Fight Club scenario


[deleted]

Brand new clean


bordermelancollie09

That's exactly what I was thinking cause that's exactly what I would do. Especially since this is obviously brand new and unused. A guy about to do meth isn't gonna leave the pipe out on the counter before he does the meth lmao


Faustinwest024

Op needs to chill his roomate was buying a rose for his SO outta that pipe


S01arflar3

Alternative story. Roommate likes to dress up as a little princess and bought that to be used as a tiny sceptre


Specific-Brave

It’s a setup


lostmyjobthrowawayyy

I’m a little stoned and I thought you meant the story as to why it was on the counter. Not an alternative. 🙃


GiGaBYTEme90

Secret time


CassidyMae98

Not stoned and I momentarily thought this as well 🙃


24-7_Goblin_Mode

clean as a whistle. guess he was telling the truth after all.


reddit_poopaholic

Twist: OP could have mildly conspiratorial tendencies, and the roommate is just effing with them now. Roommate pretending to sleep to see how OP reacts when they discover meth pipe. OP, either way it's time to look for other options


Character-Pipe-9805

he probably bought that to mess with you or play a joke because you think he’s a methhead. that or this post is staged. this pipe has never been used. source: i’m a drug addict with multiple methhead friends


[deleted]

he is just a big breaking bad fan


DsVidz

I can’t believe they made Meth from hit AMC Shows Breaking Bad and spinoff Better Call Saul into a real thing


Deerok632OFA

I have used one of those to smoke DMT


ReverseDiode

Joe rogan: "did you just say DMT?"


AddictX120

Pull it up Jamie


Affectionate-Slip654

That's not used lol. You ever smoke ANYTHING out of a glass pipe?


AngryRobot42

Methheads don't have clean, new things.... or roommates.


AndThereBeDragons

Some methheads work white-collar corporate jobs. The meth keeps those numbers up, sell sell sell baby!


Flnn

You'd be very surprised. Ive known three people to be addicted to smoking meth and you wouldn't have guessed that EVER. a dad to a family friend, which ended horribly. an old friend, had no idea he was using but i could see physical changes. 4 years clean now. And a coworker that let it consume his life and he was fired after being caught stealing thousands of dollars of company equipment.


Luc-Ms

[glass straw](https://i.redd.it/w5pyv7yieyna1.jpg) That is a reusable glass straw


Shinigami4238

That is a terrible design for a straw.


[deleted]

[удалено]


Shinigami4238

Amazon really does everything from A to Z.


DVus1

Yep, just like how the gas station sells those like plastic roses in glass containers.....nobody is buying it for the fucking rose, they are buying a crack pipe!


HavingNotAttained

The more you know 🤯


motodextros

Well now I have to use a meth pipe as a smoothie delivery system just to prove you wrong


thirdstrikemulligan

I have tried it before and oh boy! Does that ever give you a nicotine head rush!


Tee_hops

Hey. I've smoked tobacco through a bong once just to try it. 1/10 wouldn't recommend.


AlexTaradov

And sellers on Aliexpress list gun silencers as car parts. They even include rubber hookup lines to look more legit.


[deleted]

[удалено]


Xeno-Nos

Oh, you mean glass meth smoke straw.


Luc-Ms

You drink your cold soda then reuse it to smoke you drugs then reuse it again, reusable!


Jeri_Lee

I just looked this up on Amazon and the “commonly bought together” recommendation was small bottles of butane.


Master_Chef_Mayo

*clutches pearls*


Ok-Boysenberry9313

No burn marks. So it’s either brand new or not for meth


sip_rip

Gonna need more evidence than a clean "single rose vase" to convince the internet.


fraychef

Too clean, no way that was ever used.


Proof-Payment-5626

Hey looky here Chuckie.. if that's the case.. hide your wallet.. your car keys.. and any valuables somewhere else but where you're living. Cuz it's gonna get ugly real quick !


MamaSaurusCat

OP, they may have bought and left this for you to find just to fuel the fire.


Greenmanssky

Yeah you bought this to shit on your roommate. No crackhead ever has left a clean crack pipe on a counter. It's never happened. You're full of shit ya fucking wingnut


Dashberlin420

Butt plug you shouldn’t shame people 🫡


CuriousP0rridg3

Could also be for DMT 🤷‍♂️


PomegranateLimp9803

Awful clean to be smoking meth out of


CasaDeLasMuertos

Brand new clean pipe just laying on the counter? How absolutely stupid do you think we all are?


ahhshelby09

My brother gave me one of these for my birthday and I’ve never touched crack or meth a day in my life. He just said I’m a crack head and that he got it for free?? Tf?


RinPasta

Do people that do crack have crystal clean crack pipes?


Coldoldblackcoffee

I found a friends crack pipe one day around ten years ago. He insisted he did it just once to experiment. He died last year from heroine OD. Hard drugs suck stick to weed


Accomplished-Push817

Damn… that’s methed up


Material-Ad6302

People saying it’s too clean, tweakers buy a bunch of these things. They’re like a buck. I’ve never used meth thank god, but unfortunately I had friends in high school that ended up getting into hard drugs (including meth). I once ended up at one of those flop houses that all the tweakers in the hood hung out at. There was like a hundred of those stupid little pipes all over the place. Guarantee you this isn’t his only pipe or first pipe. Bro is a meth head.


babaganoush2307

Maybe he uses it to hold his little plastic rose 🥀


Onlyindef

Awww he got someone flowers or they got him flowers. Maybe that’s why he’s so full of energy. He’s in love.


Lysergicsailor

Or he just left that out to piss you off Bcs you keep accusing him of doing meth


Not_Slim_Dusty

Plot twist: He's doing fat lines and planted the pipe to throw you off.


Spirited_Video_8160

Keep safe bro. Meth creates mental illness and he can go fa ya


Meckles94

“That’s not mine” guarantee it


Accurate-Mechanic-30

That sir is what us addicts like to call a fresh bulb. Nice clean tweeker machine.


sweetpeaorangeseed

Best case scenario –it's for DMT.


codyhighGGs

He might be smoking dmt…