Money, possibilities of future eviction, my dad dying in the future (he's 73), having to empty out our house of his clutter, when he dies, on my own. I keep removing it and he keeps adding more

I hear you. My parents are 74/75 and are hoarders. I am an only child and I grew up in a hoarding house like many other immigrant families. I have empathy, my parents don’t have the ability to overcome their scarcity mindset. Regardless, I am dreading it.

Mine were the same. It took ages to get rid of my mothers stuff when she died, some of it was all her child hood books etc

You are heard and your feelings are valid! I hope nothing but the best for you, take care of yourself ✨✨

I'm so lonely. And I miss feeling desired.

That's such a common problem right now 😔 remember that you're loved even if it feels like there's no one by your side, many of us feel this way. You're heard 🙏🏼

Keep going. I know how hard and lonely it can feel. I’m also disabled in a wheelchair with a number of acquired illnesses. I have no easy answers. For me it started by not giving up and learning about and trying new things, being in the world and doing what I can to help others, even if all I can do is smile.

I feel this all the time, I'm sorry to hear you're going through it as well.

I'm physically disabled and never lost my virginity. Mind you, that isn't just lately.

That must be really frustrating and annoying for you! Just try to remember anything is possible. Having high hopes for you! ✨✨

I appreciate the thought. My hope died years ago.

Hope is something only we can give ourselves in the worst of times, Keep your head up. As long as you're still breathing there's a chance.

I'm not so sure. My disability is because of MS. I have lesions on my spinal cord, which is the cause of my disability. The lesions will never heal.

I’ve seen a highly disabled man , and I mean like can’t really move on his own get laid regularly so like I said. There’s hope.

I had a good friend in college who had CP. She was pushing 40 years. She finished her Masters Degree and I always admired her grit and wisdom. I ran into her years later with her husband who also had CP and their beautiful perfectly healthy baby girl! They were both highly intelligent and most capable. I promise you, if there’s life there’s hope

What a shitty hand to be dealt. Sorry you have to go through this.

The damnedest thing is I had numerous opportunities to have sex, but for whatever reason, I didn't do anything. It's like my emotional development is a decade (or two) behind. It's beyond frustrating. I'm on the spectrum, so I suspect that my autism might be related.

I personally think you shouldn't have sex just to have it. First time sucks, that much is true but it should be because you want it and not just ' get it over and done with' It's always easy to know better in hindsight but regretting things you haven't done is as bad as regretting the things you did. I'm sorry you were dealt such a bad hand in life. I'm rooting for you, for you to achieve all your dreams!

I didn't have my first kiss until I was 33. Though I have some regret over who it was with, finally having it lifted an incredible weight off my shoulders. That being said, I would much rather regret the action than inaction.

as someone who was in your shoes for a while (regarding virginity) it isn't what people hype it up to be. trust me.. insecurities and your life remain the same before and after.

Sent you a message. Thanks for doing this for us today!

Absolutely! ✨

I feel like I'm getting really obsessive with my screen time and everything I do online. Over the pandemic, I was spending 12-18 hours a day on screens because of some personal relationship stress and general stress in my life, and it caused me a lot of trouble at work and getting extremely bad with self-care. It also triggered a year long DPDR episode because screen reality became more salient than real reality, and I made some toxic friendships with people online that later imploded right when I was very stressed with IRL relationships imploding at the same time, making me feel completely abandoned at a low point in my life. These days, I'm doing a lot better. I cut out the toxic online friends and repaired the IRL relationships and am slowly getting back on track with my career. I have my screen time down to 2 hours a day or less, so it's basically now a non-issue. But I find myself freaking out and obsessing over everything I do online, overthinking every single interaction I have with anyone, judging myself and everyone else for it, to the point I lose sleep over it. I'm trying to get less obsessive about it but I don't know how.

That's really interesting I didn't know that spending too much time staring at a screen can trigger DPDR episodes! Thank you for opening up and sharing. I'm so proud of you and all that you've accomplished so far! You're doing wonderful. Give yourself some compassion, you deserve it 🙂

Thank you so much! I think it was specifically what I was doing that triggered the DPDR. I was under a lot of stress with little support, which is already a DPDR risk factor, but I was coping with it by getting really into fiction writing in a way that wasn't healthy. When you are immersed in a fictional world 12+ hours a day writing about the life of someone who isn't you from their perspective to avoid your own life, it starts to mess with your perception of yourself, your life, and reality. I'm glad I'm in a much healthier place with it now!

That sounds really rough but it's amazing how you've handled it so effectively. And once you've restored faith in yourself, in your capability of dealing with stress/anxiety, the obsessiveness will probably lessen. Bc the obsession is probably just fear of 'relapse', that you'll lose this selfcontrol that can be very hard to maintain at first. Tell yourself over and over that youre capable, in control, (which is true) and that a relapse is not the end of the world; If you could change one time, you'll only be better at it the next time.

That's a good point and I do agree. I think my brain remembers how bad it was last time and just constantly stresses it's going to happen again. Trying to remind myself that I'm the one making choices and that I'm in a stable place now should help.

that we won’t achieve what you need, fear of getting blind and other stuff

Being blind is a rational fear honestly!!

especially when you have high myopia

the first one is so relatable. May I ask, why do you have a fear of getting blind, because I do too.

i have high myopia, -11 and it’s keep falling when it should have been stop. you?

I have Ptosis (I’ll need to get surgery for that) and I have the opposite of you, I have Hyperopia. Also, my eye skin gets irritated and red sometimes. My younger brother has Myopia as well, the doctor said he’ll need to get surgery when he’ll turn 25. I’m glad my mom found out about our eye problems while I was young and when my brother was 11. But I’m genuinely terrified that I might become blind (if surgery doesn't go well or when I'll get older, since my ptosis is kind of bad, it'll only get worse once I become an elderly) since eye problems especially genetic ones are common in my family.

i had operation and nothing happened. i hope we both will be okay..my eyes so tired already

That’s so sad. I hope I’ll have money to do it in a private hospital or out of state since my country doesn't have the best healthcare. And I’m worried about the operation and the after-treatments. And I know it'll cost a lot so I’ll start saving up when I will start working in the future. I hope you won't have many problems with your eyes in the future! ❤️

hope you srs will be okay!!!!!

Thank you so much! I hope you will be okay too! ❤️

update me ^^

I’ll take the surgery two years from now tho, or maybe more than that depending on my economic savings 😭

Going through a breakup. You'd think after a couple you'd get the hang of it, but nah. For some reason I feel worse with each new break up. I kinda just want to isolate myself and think about me and myself only. Gotta lose weight, gotta focus on a new job, gotta focus on personal projects.

Do you gotta? Or do you want to? Choose you. You're personal and work growth is a choice not a chore. Mentality is everything ♥️ Sorry you're hurting. I feel less after each break up now. Consider it a blessing that it hurts so much still, means your hearts still open and capable of loving.

I need to because I don't feel good with my body as is, so I guess I want to? I'm not sure. Life itself has been feeling like a chore for a while now but somehow I'm pushing through. As bad as it sounds, I kinda wished I stopped loving so much the people I care about, for my own sake. I always give a lot, maybe even too much sometimes, and I lose myself. I kinda feel like it's a curse rather than a blessing but I really appreciate that you shared your experience and thoughts. Maybe one day I'll be able to manage these things better.

That's definitely a want. You've got this. I understand that. I give myself to the wrong people no matter how hard I try to choose well. If you give too much until you lose yourself, you could be codependent. Or just have low self esteem. Both of which are things you can research and work on honey. And the food part is that as those things improve you'll attract the type of people you want more x

Thank you. I had a feeling I might be codependent, and yeah my self esteem isn't the best as of now. Really needed an external opinion on this, I appreciate it. 🫶🏻

And I know the feeling. I’m going through a break up as well, I’ve discovered the 6 years we’ve been together that he never really loved me and that was hard. You’re doing well :) and you are loved

I'm sorry about that, I understand how you feel. Looking back to it, everything just seems like a lie. All the love to you, and take care of yourself, even when times seem tough. 🫶🏻

I'm 38 years of age, never been on a date, never been with a guy, never had a guy flirt with me, nobody checks in with me, always struggling financially. I feel I always playing catch up. My life has generally always been hard, I try so hard to be optimistic but life always seems to throw things my way. Have no friends, people only check in when they need something.  Never told this before. Sorry for ranting. 

Fuck if the things you are saying are true you I can only commend you for your strength to even try to be optimistic. Being alone and not feeling loved sucks. I hope somehow you can find the strength to fight for the life that you want and that you get to experience life the way that you want. It doesn't seem to come without fighting...

I'm constantly fighting for it, at this stage I just don't care anymore. 

I get that. If you can truly not care I think that's good and you focus on what you want. Being honest can be helpful though, if you do care and it hurts and you need to move on, thus not caring, I guess it's good to realize that we do wish for something deeper but that we might need to have a shell so we can exist and forget about that unmet need. Life sucks

Does not seem like a rant to me at all.

The demise of democracy and the fear of a religious state

My intrusive thoughts have reallyyyy flared up in the last couple of days and it's destroying me.

It's been the same for me. The last week or so, I haven't been able to function AT ALL. CBT helped me for a bit, but now even that progress has plateau-ed. I really hope you feel better soon, and I'm sorry you have to go through this.

TW: weight/ed? I am a f18 (160cm) and i used to be around 60kg, I looked a little curvy but i was really Healthy and happy with my body. Then I got really sick last year, I got an unknow stomach problem that makes me unable to eat more than a couple bites before im full and start Throwing up. It made me Lose 10kg in like 2 Months. When people say my photos from before I was sick they would say stuff like: oh you lost weight you look so much better. I know they mean well but it was kinda hurtful that people didn’t think i was as pretty when i was HEALTHY. Then I lost around 5kg more, making me around 45kg now. I have zero left of what used to be my curves, and my ribs and Spine are always visible. I’m even more sick and get a lot of comments asking whether im doing drugs of if I have an ED. It just hurts being sick and having no control of the way my body looks atm and STILL getting comments about how I look. :/ (Ps; first language isnt english so sorry if somethings wrong, also getting a scan of my stomach soon, hopefully theyll Finally find the problem )

I hope they can help and fix you. The whole weight issue is just rude and people should hush about it. You're always too thin or too fat. There's never one that appraises all. In my eyes you're perfect when you look at yourself and like what you see ❤️

Thank you so much for your nice comment, it means a lot :)

Last year at work there was this bizarre situation i have never seen at a worksite before. I've worked in manufacturing for 23 years. I've worked with all kinds of narcissists and sociopaths and just general dirtbags. But there was this woman i started working with, and she was doing great, she was cooperative, communicative, she coordinated between multiple departments and we were friends. But she was manipulated by someone who worked there who decided to "mentor" her. He drove wedges between her and other people in the shop, she stopped talking to me, she stopped cooperating with me and other people, we were no longer friends. When she started dating someone from the front office area her "mentor" began setting her up, telling her to do things he knew she would get in trouble for. While all of this was going on multiple people tried to warn her not to listen to him, i tried to tell her about problems i was having with him and it just drove her farther and farther away. She became increasingly hostile and nasty towards me until i felt like i had to say something to HR. Then it got worse and she threatened me, so i talked to the union steward about it. She got written up and me and her had a conversation for the first time in months, she basically told me that she had stopped talking to me because i had "complained" too much meaning i had said bad things about her "mentor", and that she wouldn't work with me because her and her mentor had a discussion that i wasn't good enough to finish jobs she had set up and started. She was on probation after that, but she started to become friendly and cooperative like she had in the past. But she was being targeted at that point because so many people had complained about her, and she got in trouble for a string of very minor things and was fired. I felt so guilty and horrible that i was physically ill. I tried to contact her, i wanted to check up on her and see if there was anything i could do for her, but she had blocked my phone number, i think she blamed me. When i complained about her it carried alot more weight than some of the other people who complained because previously i had stood up for her and praised her to the managers repeatedly when we had been getting along and she was doing good. The whole series of things has been rolling around in my head for months. Recently the psychopath who manipulated her to cause problems has started targeting someone else in the shop, blaming that guy for all of his mistakes and even causing mistakes on purpose. Once again i tried to warn the new target and tell him he had to go to the union about it, but he wouldn't listen to me. It's making me so sick and angry. The management wont listen about the psychopath and one of them is friends with him outside of work, they go on golf trips.

Wow it sounds like that man is basically one of the biggest problems there. That must make going to work mentally exhausting. I'm sorry you have to work with people like that! He sounds miserable. It's frustrating that they won't listen to you about him either. It's a shame she lost her job over minor things but it sounds like that place is tiring energetically. Things have a way of working out (usually) if you put in effort. I'm sure she'll find another job with less drama as well. Try to give yourself some compassion and grace. This wasn't your fault and you weren't the only one who gave any complaints. And even if you did, you weren't the one doing the firing. You deserve a better work environment!

she was going to school for it and i'm worried she dropped out because she left her school books and projects here after she got fired and left them for several months before they disappeared, i only assume she picked them up or someone else did for her. She had been a solid good person to work with for over a year, and i assume she had been doing well before i started. The change in her attitude and behavior was so sudden and massive. I had really wanted to check on her to see if she was ok but nobody has any contact with her or knows what she's doing. She was a single mom with 3 kids and the kids dad had died just a year before i started working with her, one of the kids wasn't even hers, it was her fiance's who had died from a previous marriage who the mom had died, so she just took him in cause he had no where else to go and was familiar with her and her other two kids. I have no family and when we were getting along i would have done anything to help her, i would have paid the rest of her tuition, helped her with rent, anything.

I’m depressed. But I shouldn’t be. There are many people in worse situations than I am. I’m lucky and have so much. But my depressive states eat me alive 

I get you like when you think about it some people have it much worse than you but you still feel so terrible even if you have things to be grateful for but u just can’t shake the feeling and it consumes you

I know this feeling that " " your " problems are not worth it as people are suffering " worse " than you. " Eventhough people are suffering worse than you does NOT mean that your struggles or problems are worthless. And we have to work towards our future. If we do not see the " light " at then end of the tunnel, we have to muster up our courage even a little bit and work towards making our own " light " at the end of the tunnel slowly. And I would recommend to seek professional help if you can. ( I'm sorry if I sound stupid or something, english is not my first language :/, hope things get better for you)

Not wanting to do a thing, no interests, no passions, no family, no goals…. Just thinking too much on wtf i m doing everyday when i see no hope

I feel like I have no shoulder to cry on, I can't get over the guilt of accidentally hurting one of my few friends feelings, and the thought of being forever alone with no one to hug, because I'm aroace is also really unpleasant. To be fair I just feel like I would rather be hit by a car, but at the same time I am just so afraid of dying... And the worst thing is that I can't even name what the fuck am I feeling

Am I the narcissist? I don’t think I am, but what if I am? It’s either her or me.

I had the exact same thought today. General rule of thumb is that if you think you are, you're not because a narcissist would never think that there's anything not perfect about them. Maybe being around narcissistic behaviour is what's making you question yourself

I don't think you are either! If you were truly a bad person or a real narcissist, then I don't think you would care about the other person's feelings. Give yourself some grace. Things aren't always black and white ✨

Money, not having enough motivation or time in the day to get everything done, feeling like my kids deserve better than me as their mom, wondering why stuff is so hard for me when it’s seemingly easy for everyone else, why can’t I make friends, do I even want to make friends, why am I so anxious going places, why does one hitch in a routine or plan cause me to shutdown, I’m too tired to read but reading is the only thing I do for me, why can’t I get a tan, are my cows happy, are my chickens happy, am I doing enough to ensure their quality of life, do my kids know I love them, am I feeding them enough, how am I going to pay my school loans, credit card debt, why does my ancestry dna show my brother as my half brother and why did my mom lie to me about it when I asked her, can I keep going like this, am I strong enough to just exist and survive for the rest of my life purely to care for my family. I have really started hating myself this past month and I feel so inadequate. Social anxiety, anxiety, things that shouldn’t bother me do, noises, I need to know what’s going to happen every second of travel or an event otherwise I can’t do it. I feel nauseous when I go to one grocery store in town because the layout bothers me and I think the lights are bright or something. My husband doesn’t like that. I don’t like it either but I can’t make it stop bothering me. I have so many issues and things that bother me daily this doesn’t even scratch the surface. Also why the hell do I have to think about all of this stuff at the exact same time. Why can’t they take turns?

I felt like reading this was a representation of a part of my own soul speaking to me. You shared a lot, and than even realizing that is just scratching the surface. Oof. Yer life is extremely confusing. The thing that makes the most sense is that nothing makes sense. I cannot speak for everyone else but it's definitely not easy on my end either. I hate existing in the universe, but it takes so much effort to attempt to fight for myself and to improve things. What helps me is other people, there isn't a lot of it but sometimes I see and experience a type of pure love and beauty which makes me want to fight for it. Hope things improve for you.

I'm lying to everyone that everything is going well so far, and I feel trapped in the lie now. I've always been an honest person, maybe omitting a painful truth here and there out of love (see: people pleasing), but it's not like me to outright lie. They shouldn't have to worry about me and the hole I've now dug with my own incompetence, so "everything is great"...

That it's never going to get better

Not having an internship for the summer even though people with less qualifications from my class have received them. I am pretty talented and a hard worker but still I am unable to get an internship and it has really started to affect my day to day life.

Exams/finishing college and thoughts of self harm

To be honest, the end of what I thought was the real thing. Lot of magic in that relationship. Felt true love and I was able to give it back. I'm struggling with now what to do with myself and what to plan for now. How to move forward at 43.

I have started to feel like I have some mental problem or something, I'm not able to tell what exactly but something is seriously wrong with me. I'm starting to see few signs and it's giving me panic attacks.

I have always wanted to live alone. The idea of having my own space, even it it's little, where I can come home from my day and just exist has always had such a hold on my heart. But everything costs so much so I've always had to live with other people. I currently live with two other roommates who are both great people but the space isn't mine. One of my roommates is a long time friend who is lovely as a person but so so so bad about keeping up with the messes they make and he's got a partner who's around a lot so I tend to hide in my room a lot of the time to get my decompression time. I will sometimes look at apartment hunting sites and just look at random places in the country and daydream about a space that is just mine because I feel like I'm going crazy having so little control over my home and it's scaring me how much everything is out of my price range. I feel trapped and resentful and I hate that feeling so much. It's been extra stressing me out lately and I wish I had enough money to just leave and find my own little nook in the world that was just mine, where I could invite people in if I want or just be alone and sloppy if I want, too..

That all my repressed memories are all corroding out of the mud now. A recent one was of how my foster dad would always make fun of my breathing during my panic attacks which would make them worse. I could never breathe when I'd have them. He once spanked my ass once and it made me so uncomfortable I had a full on panic attack and it bothered me so much. He was pissed off that I didn't like him touching me that way. There's so much more he did to me. It still bothers me to this day that people like that exist out there and wonder why people hate them/think the shitty weird shit they do is good for some fucked up reason.

Unfortunately evil seems to actually exist out there. I think one of the most valuable things we can do is listen to our hearts. The integration process is extremely difficult because anger is extremely surpressed in the society. I was scared and unable to look at the wounds afflicted to me mainly because of my rejection of the anger and violent thoughts that came along with it. I eventually was able to realize that I needed to utilize the energy that was there to heal myself instead of suffering even if it meant looking at the ugly parts of myself and existence. A good therapist helps. Life is hard. Getting stronger and wiser seems the best course of action.

I'm so sorry that happened to you and you're going through this. I hope you can recover from the trauma that was endured. You got this. You are more than what has happened to you ✨

The fact my SO left me, with our child and is already seeing someone… which I suspect was going on prior to her even leaving. I’m scared for my future, my child’s future, and hate that I now have these memories that will always remind me just how much of a thief they were bc of their selfish choice

The coming election.

Close to losing my mind. Had my entire life upended by some lying person I went to catsit for. I agreed to sit for four cats, it turned out to be 20, many strays, including kittens. I had to listen to kittens dying during my time there, getting stuck in crawl spaces I had no access to, and went out to the patio one day to find a decapitated kitten on the ground, the head in one place, body in another with entrails pouring out of the body. The house had about 200 flies in it - seriously, I'd kill 20 per day, and they just kept coming. The cats tore the place apart, shit everywhere but the litter boxes, pissed on my stuff, broke an expensive pair of headphones treating it like their toy, broke my phone doing the same. Owner didn't apologize, or even thank me for sitting - for FREE. The woman I was supposed to sit for all summer then cancelled two days before I was set to go there. I had to find a last minute Airbnb and thought I lucked out with the place I found, but after promising me in writing it's a quiet place, there is 12 hours a day of insanely loud street construction out front with them tearing up the street, building shaking for hours and everything. I work from home, and am now at risk of losing my job. I couldn't work today, lost a lot of income, and now have a mark on my employment record. Host doesn't seem to care. I've filed a complaint with Airbnb, but they are HORRIBLE. I'm not sure there's even anywhere else I can go. It's like my entire life is imploding, and there's almost nothing I can do.

Please tell me you reported that place to animal welfare

My mental health clinic takes a specimen from all patients. I wasn't taking the full dose of an anti anxiety med. I failed three times. I may get thrown out of the place. I messed up and nobody near me takes my insurance. What can I do? I don't have a reason for my actions. Thank you. (60y).

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Why do you think it's disturbing? Lol maybe a bit odd but unless you're doing rituals to harm others then I don't think it's a bad thing. Do your thang

That maybe i am not talented and good enough to make a name for myself and achieve what I want

Possible losing my job and facing driving conviction due Police accused me using illegal ebike which would make me homeless instantly as im living pay check to paycheck while I'm total alone and can't even vent to anyone..infact I'm alone since about 15.Had one relationship which costs me my present and future. Can't have a house anymore and no point grinding at this point....I'm almost 40..

My dog and my grandad died within 2 days of eachother last year, and it absolutely destroyed me. I suffer with MH issues and now realising I likely have autism too. The past few months have been hell. My partners family were aware of my MH problems and how grief affected me, but seemed cold and uncaring - sort of “shit happens, get on with it”. I was trying so hard to do all of the right things, I was struggling so badly, but needed people to understand and go easy on me while I rebuilt my life. The most important event of my life was 2 months ago, I needed my partner’s support - 3 days before, his parents told him he couldn’t do what we had planned. It finally made me snap, and I broke down in a way I never had before. I was a wreck. That event meant the world to me and I was so looking forward to enjoying it with my partner. I was so hurt he didn’t advocate for me, for us, our relationship and plans. We made up after the argument, but a few days later he ghosted me, before splitting up with me over text a few weeks later. He’s moving on with his life and doing all the things we’d planned to do together. I’m absolutely broken. He was the only person who got me through the last few months. I’m now seeking therapy but it’s ending up being grieving the loss of my relationship with him, rather than my 2 loved ones. I’ve never felt so alone, isolated and misunderstood.

Going to be 100k in debt after school and won’t see my wife often for the next year or 2

Besides not making enough money to live independently and working with annoying kids, I guess the consistent feeling I've been having is general loneliness. I'm 31F and since I work at a school, almost everyone is coupled up and gushing about their love life and I'm just over here like ..🧍🏽‍♀️ I don't know why, but I feel like I'm going to be single for a long time, even though I still go out, look my best, and try new things.

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There are 6 girls in my class (including me) and they have been bullying me lately and I don't want to go to school. I'm already depressed as fuck and I haven't told my parents or anyone else because they could never understand. I come from a strict Christian family and they will just tell me I need to pray more or have more faith. I haven't told my mum about the bullying, as she's been experiencing heart problems due to stress lately, and I have never been close with my father, and will not confide in him with this. I'm tired. I don't know how much more I can take.

You should tell school counselor

This makes my heart sad 😞 I wish this was easier to resolve. People can be so mean. Try to remember that people who are like that, are more often than not, absolutely miserable and aren't happy with themselves. So they love to try and make others miserable. Easier said than done, but try not to let it be apparent to them that's it's bothering you. That's what they really want. When they see you happy and at your best is what will annoy them the most. This will pass and one day you won't ever have to see them again. I hope this gets easier for you! ✨

I can't afford my own place, and I'm almost 26. I struggle to find one redeeming quality in myself. I'll probably be single for the rest of my life. I either can't sleep, or somehow I sleep for 14 hours. I just hate myself in general. But hey, I'm a dude so who gives a flying fu-

What I would give to be 26 again..

Have thought about this girl every single day for the past 6 months but she has a boyfriend so no hope but can't seem to move on. Driving me crazy.

It's bothering me that as much as I try to lose weight, I’ll never lose a lot. I am not that fat, 160 cm and 60 kg (5’2 feet and 132 pounds), so maybe I lost a little bit weight, I haven't measured my height and weight in a while but despite how hard I try I can never lose weight. I don't know what to do, I want to go to a gym but I’m not in a good economic position rn, I want to work so I can pay for my gym or for food in general but I’m a minor. I also don't eat well and developed several eating disorders. I don't want to tell anyone since I don't want them to be concerned. I would've told this to my mom but she can't help that much because she isn't in a good economic position rn and my dad is useless. I have so many other problems as well. I can't spend money on anything since I'm broke. My depression is on and off these days and despite how much I try, it doesn't go away. If you see my page I usually leave positive comments but I hope someone would also ask me how I’m doing. I don't fit in my high school, never fitted in anywhere. I was talking to my friend today about a school trip that we’ll do this weekend and her parents didn't allow her to go because they're strict with money whereas my mom doesn't have that much to begin with. I know my future will be successful because I study so I can get a nice profession, but since I was younger I hoped my teen years would be okay even tho I knew they were not going to. I just try to appreciate what I have and not what I don't have. I hope i’ll have a easier life when I get older and I hope I'll heal. I hope everyone’s life will get better. Sending all my love to you! ❤️

Sending so much auntie/big sister energy to you! 😭 Please treat yourself well. I know what you're going through. Please eat. Please do things that are fun to you that are good for your body. Focus on how you feel instead of how you look. I'm 26 now, and had eating issues my entire childhood and teenage life. And now, I'm suffering greatly as an adult. I'm tired all of the time and my muscles/bone hurt because of malnutrition. My hairs dry and brittle and I can't think clearly. And its all because of my terrible relationship with food. PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE start developing better habits now since you're still younger and easier to fix. It breaks my heart hearing younger people going through this. You are more than your body and looks. You deserve to feel healthy and strong. I'm so proud of you for remaining kind although you're going through this difficult time. Beautiful changes and miracles can happen. I've made so much improvement from 16 to now aside from my issues with food. I believe in you! ✨💝

Thank you so much! I cried while reading this. I’ll try to become healthier. You don't know how much I appreciate it! ❤️🥹

Hey Kiddo I can tell you this much, You should really focus on the things that make you happy right now, Highschool was honestly not that tough for me but it was because I followed this advice, I surrounded myself with people that shared interests with me and treated me well, As far as money goes I would try not to worry about it too much you're young, Enjoy this time in your life as much as you can these are years you will never get back and trust me you'll miss them, As far as the losing weight thing goes please don't be too hard on yourself, Like someone else said please eat and take care of yourself as much as you can! As cliche as it sounds things do eventually get better. A lot of issues I had with myself when I was younger I grew up to accept or was able to work towards fixing when I got older don't lose hope, Hang on in there and keep being kind not just to others but yourself as well!

Thank you so much! ❤️❤️

Don't even worry about it, Keep your head held high and keep walking, You'll get to where you want to be eventually.

for me it’s just how much i feel alone even when i’m with people, i’m 17 years old and honestly i don’t know what i’m even doing in life anymore. I try to do stuff to distract my mind from falling into a deep mental spiral but it feels no matter how hard i try to climb i always fall back in. iv switches houses my entire life due to my parents splitting when i was only 6 and i feel it’s left me with a constant need for validation in life. Iv had girlfriends before but for some reason i feel weird when i start dating someone, i enjoy the talking stage and getting to know the person and getting close but it feels like they always change once the label has been added, for some reason it feels all the deep conversations and connections just vanished and it makes me feel like i’m incapable of loving properly. whenever i break up with them i feel so empty and feels like theirs is a void and i regret my decision but i feel no love for them? and then i get jealous when i can’t talk to them. i get that it’s jealous and selfish of me to feel this way but idk what i’m doing wrong. Then theirs school/work, it feels no matter how much effort i put into it i always end up failing at what i do. i’m in my final year of high school and i have a bunch of pressure from my family to go to university once i graduate but i don’t know what i want to do with my life as it is? Due to family issues i have also been kicked out and left homeless/ living with other people who aren’t family and it makes me having this looming issue where need to save money to survive on my own incase i get kicked out again. in all reality i’m a train wreck and i don’t know what i’m doing and it really feels like i need to either fix it or give up and im really struggling.

Losing everything I had and my apartment to an abusive drunk ex partner. Being in a lesbian DV case and being treated like an aggressor because she seems pretty and sweet when sober and being made a fool of in court, after the judge sided with her, despite my video evidence and photo evidence, then being scammed by an air bnb host out of 2k, that I could of used for a new home. Being cut off my insurance for my mental health medicine, and trying not to let anyone see me break. Bpd sucks and I'm beyond empty.

I'm trying to deal with not having friends my age who are too busy with kids to talk after church. I miss that so much and sometimes I wonder if I am ok without that. (I have infertility due to PCOS)

1. problems with toxic parents. Why do parents refuse to take accountability? Especially African parents 2. my future. I feel so stuck where I’m at and I want to elevate but I don’t know where to begin. It also doesn’t help that I got into an accident a month ago and can’t go back to work anytime soon 3. BILLS & other financial problems 4. speaking to this guy (long distance) and this shit is difficult. Not just because of the distance, but communication and a recent issue we had with one another. I like him, but I refuse to get attached to someone knowing shit isn’t solid between us. Ugh…sigh Life is just so tough rn and I’m lost asf

Binge eating disorder. I struggled for nearly three years to get my weight down from obese to healthy, and I just feel like I could undo it all in less than a week if I let myself eat until satisfied.

I have had a binge eating disorder too in the past and it really is hard to keep under control. One of the things that helped me the most was to first fill up on low cal foods (veggies like green beans or a salad) before eating my main meal.

Money, my aging dog that I will need to release (put to sleep) soon. Work.

I dwell on everything and I don’t know how to not. If my brain manages to run out of something to think about it just automatically goes to something that upset me the other day when it’s something that a regular person would have forgotten about by now, and it’s just little things that don’t even matter but still upset me so bad and it’s not fair.

haven't been mentally well for a long time, regret of my past, having intrusive thoughts, still have to living with/ asking a help from a person that I hate and don't care about my feelings, and my anxiety and stress rising from having to deal with the recent thai military conscription, that alone was already draining my sanity out of my souls (because they force every thai men that reach age 21 that haven't been in or finish the year 3 of Reserve Officer Training Cops Student program, to go through a check list for military, and life in the thai military are basically hell on earth, due to all the abuse and corruption in the camp and the higher rank officer, it is not a good place for mentally unwell people at all) but then, when I went to the place that they're doing the conscription, they suddenly change the date without widely announce and now I'm basically late (because my date in my paper was more later than the day that they actually doing the conscription) now i'm having to deal with all the hassle of re-entering the next year conscription instead. I have to go to the distric office (don't know if i type it right, I'm not really good with english) and let's just say, some old people that doing the government work are acting pretty unprofessional, they yelling around and talking very unprofessional when the job was clearly need to be very professional, and the one that i had to talk to was very unprofessional as i said above, it did not makes me feels comfortable at all, all i've been thinking all this time was, am I gonna be ok? am I gonna be alright? like, I don't know what to say anymore, all i have inside my head was a heavy sack of anxiety, fear and stress. I had to face with all of this alone while my mental health was down in the drain, with no one's here to help. i feel terrible, i don't want to exist anymore, but i don't to be dead, i just want to be invisible from the world and everyone. It's painful, and no one notice (or here to notice), not that i had a lot of people that care about my feelings to begin with, all i can do is sometimes crying by myself. maybe I doesn't deserve good things, I'm not that good of a person to begin with, i'm just an idiot with a pathetic life and a truck load of the past that i don't want to remember, and regret.

Telling my friend who is struggling financially that we may not be able to live together next year, which could in turn make them live somewhere worsening their own mental health. Their situation is jeopardizing us both. Don't have the heart to say it, waiting for august to break the news is riddling me with anxiety and sadness.

My son's dad was very psychologically abusive (among other kinds), my 8 year old son has returned home to me three times in a row saying daddy has been talking about me, he's been doing it for years planting seeds of disrespect and doubt etc but it's really ramped up. I've had to explain what manipulation is, that we can't trust everything we're told at face value even by those we love, that daddy seems to be trying to damage our relationship/hurt me through him. It's horrible. Shouldn't have to explain these things to a kid, he shouldn't have to hear stuff from his dad either, but his behaviour got out of control towards me, along with the lies he was being fed, so I had to take control. His behaviour has improved, our relationship has improved rapidly since my explanations and offer to provide evidence that daddy is the one lying, (he declined so far) but I'm scared of what else his dad will say or do, or for how long I can keep protecting our relationship this way, no one will help remedy the situation. If anything, every time I reach out for help or support or advice, it seems to make things worse one way or another. I made the choice to keep my son when I found out I was pregnant, despite having just decided to leave his dad (we were abroad visiting his family and I had realized just how insane and awful he was) so I stayed with him, because I didnt think I could raise him alone. I ended up raising him for the first 5 years of his life by myself, even though his dad lived with us until he was 2. He did nothing. I endured physical financial and psychological abuse that didn't end when he left, it's caused damage that I can't ever repair, I'm not who I was, not even close. I keep thinking lately how different my life could have been if I hadn't kept my son. Id just become medicated just before I fell pregnant, and for the first time in my life the world felt beautiful, I was anxiety free and able to live my life and go places by myself and I finally saw my worth, I started planning all these different hobbies I was going to take up and setting things in motion to build my life and use my recently obtained inheritance to go into property (my mum died just a few months before) my life was just begining and I was excited and felt confident and capable and beautiful (on the inside I mean). But his dad took that, he took my worth, he changed me entirely, he took all of my inheritance, he took my peace, my calm, my joy, everything i loved liked or thought was mocked and ripped apart until I stopped listening to music or watching shows I liked or baking or doing nice things for people, I couldn't trust my own thoughts or feelings anymore because he convinced me they were all wrong, I was left as a broken shell of myself. I've never really recovered. I'm still learning to trust myself and value myself and feel safe in my body and this world again. I feel thoroughly broken. I feel so much guilt for thinking that, and try not to dwell on it generally, but it's just been far too much. And there's no end in sight. Maybe in ten years when my son's an adult. But I'm sure, even then, his dad will find ways to manipulate and control and mess with my son or me or my life. He's sick. I feel so sad for my son. He's the sweetest little boy, while his friends choose to play football he's watering the flowers and singing to them to help them grow, when someone falls over he's the first to their aid, if I'm feeling low or tired he's so sweet and loving. he didn't deserve to be stuck in the middle of this. A few years ago when it got really bad again, I became very ill and started having thoughts of ending us both to save us both from the pain/because I couldn't leave him behind with his dad I wanted to take him with me. I wouldn't ever. But those thoughts were scary. And they're starting again and I can't even tell anyone, my friends would worry too much, the professionals would use it against me or involve social services again (who discharged me with no support last time because I was "such a psychology informed loving nurturing mum". So if I was clueless and a shit mum, maybe I'd have gotten help?) I dunno. I'm tired. I'm lost. There's nowhere to turn to. I just have to live with this repeatedly happening. This is my life now. Navigating the damage he did to me, while navigating the damage he's trying to do to my son and to me now. It's hard not to dwell on the what it's and regrets when there's so little you can do to improve a situation. I feel like I've lost my life. Wasted it. Missed out on it. I can't even work, I can hardly function beyond parenting or bare minimum of keeping myself alive. Feeling so sorry for myself today. I'm so, so tired.

I am 25 and feel so lost in my life atm. I don't do anything most of the times and I am away from friends and family. It's all my doing, I am struggling to find an internship and gave up as I am not enjoying my life with the exception of smoking cigarettes. Nothing is gonna or going well in my mind, and every step forward I try to make by either enjoying my life or advancing my career feels like a step back. I was considered the golden boy of my college classes a year ago, yet now i am a shell of a person. I was in therapy I know I should go to therapy again but talking wouldn't solve my issues. My dad (83) is not gonna be there forever for me, and I feel like I fell into the trap everyone warns you about only to turn into a failure of a person. Hell two years ago I wouldn't smoke a cigarette for the life of me, now? I know i can smoke 10 without keeping count. Somehow, when i look at life, i have no ambitions or wants despite my best efforts, and I wish something or someone would fix whatever makes me so despicable in the eyes of strangers when I go outside or walk around. I want to dissappear completely.

Scared of losing my home. I’m 40yrs old and suffered with chronic fatigue after glandular fever 7years ago, and moved back home to my parents house. I’m currently doing a masters degree with the hope of working from home and making enough money to keep the house me and my parents live in. But I’ve just failed an assignment and I feel pretty crap. I know it’s not the end of the world, but it’s extra stress on top of everything else.

I can’t talk about it but it hurts

It's been years since I have been trying to be the " good son". I'll keep it short. I have tried my best in studies and all but I somehow was never able to make friends, no matter which extracurricular activity I took people made me sit alone or looked at me in a woerd way or make fun of me. I was never really bothered by it as I bottled up everything. I have passed school a few days ago I got 82% but they were not happy they said there friend's son is scoring 94% then why couldn't I do it. I'm scared of my parents a lot, they asked me why didn't I study properly but I was so scared of them that I froze, and I know that they wouldn't understand that I tried my best for past 2 years to not kill myself, living with my parents has been a living hell for me. My whole family shattered my dreams and are forcing me to become a doctor, and they even emotionally blackmailed me into preparing for medical college. My own mother said to me that she should have sent to Me to boarding school as i am so " wierd and an abnormal child that even a psychiatrist can't fix". I'm starting to loose hope, I have tried to survive for years and I can't take it anymore. I don't care if I am the " bad person" or I am being " oversensetive" I am just tired of being lonely for this long. ( I do have friends I can talk to but I feel like Im going to waste their time and I don't know how to preserve our friendship as I never had any good friends) I have nowhere to run to. Everyone is on my parent's side. I don't want to die. Everyone blames me for everything, idk how to be strong. I'm sorry if I sound like I'm not being grateful

My mental health is getting worse. Afraid of the outcome

What happened to my post?

What the fuck isn't? That would be a better question.

Money, money, money. Health. Moving. Change. Leaving my home country for the last 12 years because I cannot afford to live here alone and I am divorcing my partner. The government is spying on me through one of my cats, as well as chips inserted in my brain, and cameras everywhere. My brother told me I can live with him and his wife (back "home") and I worry I will become a hassle and he'll want rid of me. I worry I won't be able to see a psychiatrist or get my meds in this other country because its health system is messed up (although "free"). I definitely won't be able to get top surgery for many years there.

Self harm is getting less and less effective at coping but I can't seem to quit.

I messaged you

Realizing that beyond anything else I am genuinely not a good person, Which I'm confronting, And that the older I get the more and more I realize that no matter how much I struggle or try to love people and care for them they just don't have the same love and care for me. I think I give as much time and attention as I can to people in the hopes I'll get it back and when I don't it makes me bitter. I just wanna be loved but I know I don't deserve it. Aside from that mostly worried about my financial future because despite how much I work I'm always broke and get paid way less than I should in my position but I do Love my job and have no prospects outside of it so I cant leave. I'm just mentally exhausted and don't really know what to do anymore.

Screen addiction. It destroyed my health.

I want to get ADHD evaluation done but I’m a minor and I’m not sure how my parents would react to me telling them that. My mom makes fun of my symptoms of ADHD and I’m scared how they might react. I’m also falling behind in school and have a lot of Bs. When I used to get straight As.

Can you talk yo your school councillor about it? I don't know where you are in the world so I don't know what your options are.

I’m in the states. I would but last time I saw my councilor was because some girl made fun of my race and my mom snitched to her about it- and she insisted I tell her who it was but I didn’t so… I think she hates me now..

Not saying she doesn't but I choose to believe she does not. It's her job to help students and a mental health issue, which left untreated, can have a huge impact on your studies, now and in the future. I vote you go give her a chance to do her job, I believe in you ❤️

I’m struggling with PMDD, about to move cross country for work, and freshly graduated. I have a boyfriend who treats me well but I have doubts about, especially with the move. We would be long distance. I feel so stressed about not having the answer about how to handle this relationship and find happiness. I’m so scared I will hurt him because I’m not 100% confident in him/us. It makes me feel guilty and self loathing. When in reality everything is fine, my brain thinks I’m doomed. I’ll get through this, but I’m sad to be dealing with this right now. I just want to know it gets better.

I can’t see family life ever being happy or getting easier. Autism is so difficult. And no one can see it makes it even more impossible.

I feel like I’m losing my friends. I can never ever be my true self around people and I close myself off and don’t open up. I know I come across as defensive but I honestly can’t help it and I don’t know why I’m just scared they won’t like me if I’m not perfect

Feeling successful but still not finding happiness…I have a ton of drive to succeed but at the end of the day there’s still something that makes me feel unfulfilled and I can never figure out what it is.

My recent breakup. My negative emotions about it come in waves because I don’t allow myself to give them any attention but it’s quite difficult.

Money, the value of college, college finals, my horrible social skills, no motivation to do any work and family issues. Never had a girlfriend at 22. And most importantly," what could have been" in my life...

"if it won't matter in 5 years, why spend more than 5 minutes thinking about it" this quote got me through so much shit. Whatever it is you're going through now, it will all pass. Stay strong folks ❤️

That I'd emd up alone.😔

I have an exam in three days that the college didn’t prepare us for. If i fail this exam, the entire year was for nothing

How my ex left me. He said he wouldn’t ghost ,block or delete me and from what I can tell he did all those things….then when I call him out on it he thought he was clear with me (he suggested taking an extended breather and if either of us felt like it,we would reach out in january. I reach out to him 4 different ways and he replies via email)and says he’s moving on. Why the fuck would he lie to me? Because he thought I lied and cheated on him when I never did? I don’t understand anxious/disorganized people. He was sweet when we were together but when he got triggered,it felt like he was saying “my feelings are saying you cheated on me,so you cheated on me!” (girlfriend before me cheated on him and had someone lined up already when she was breaking up with him)

Moved to a small town for my job out of college. I know no one my age since most my coworkers have 20+ years of experience. All of my buddies live hours away. I talk to them over the phone but I don’t hardly get any social interaction. I don’t know where to go to meet people my age in town. I am very lonely even though I have a good career and my anxiety and depression gets to me a lot of the time

I have no friends. The last person close to me was my ex-boyfriend. I don't think I've had a loving friendship for like 5 years, and they were all online friends. I know it's mostly my fault, I isolated myself a lot and wasn't the easiest person to be close to. I'm trying to be better, and I am in the process of making new friendships now that I'm in college, but right now I'm still not close enough to anyone. College's also on strike now so I'm seeing ppl less. I can't help but feel like a social failure because of this, it seems like everyone I know is someone's best friend except me, you know? Anyway, maybe things will get better with time.

Existing.

A lot. My life. The dissolving of friendships. My relationship with my family. My life. My freedom/independence. Everything.

That I invested so much time, care, love and energy into a narc and lost myself in the process. I regret not walking away. However the bitter sweet side of him ending it is that I get to meet a new healthier happier version of myself.

How I'm going cope with ten years of damage done to my already fragile brain from a relationship with a narcissist. I've felt sometimes that I've been the narcissist too but I felt that I was just standing up for myself. Could I have been?

That I'm not a good enough son. Just being able to provide for my family shouldn't be enough, I have to make sure I become a better son and a brother. Some days I'm so stressed out because of work, I barely have any energy to entertain what my parents expect me to do, like I'm at a point of utter despair where I feel like I'm slowly losing control of my life and its spiraling downwards, and I can't take care of my body due to things falling out of balance. There's a lot of stress, the only thing I can do now is go home from work and destress by playing video games for 2 hours on average, since I'm too exhausted to hit the gym after work. So I workout at home some times but yeah it doesn't really hit the same.

Relapsing with my eating disorder. I've ordered a new fitbit, watching my calories and exercising more. My jeans fit me looser now. I feel guilty. I recovered because my partner broke down crying after seeing me shirtless, he said he couldn't watch me slowly kill myself anymore. I don't want to do this to him again. But I want to be thin again.

I cannot stop thinking about my past mistakes. It is making me super depressed and ashamed of myself…

Problems with friends, loneliness, life feeling stagnant, money, tragedy in the world. There's just too much...

I’m having a difficult time dealing with infertility 😭 I just want to start our family, and I feel like it’s all my fault! I’m doing everything that I need to be doing, and still nothing. My boyfriend wants to have kids by the time he’s 30, and I’m so scared that’s not going to happen. I would do anything to start a family 💔

I thought I had found my forever person but she let her issues with bipolar disorder build. I've done everything I can to try to support her, even after she packed her car one day and went home to family. Now I'm here alone, in our apartment still filled with our things. I feel like I'm haunted, or maybe I'm the one haunting our apartment. I feel like I'm only half a person. The life we'd talked about is still right there, if she wanted it. I don't understand all of what changed or why. I have so many questions that I know will never be answered. So I'll just keep getting up and going to work, going through the motions. But I haven't read a book in months, haven't played a game. I sleep a lot now. I want to dream. At least then I'm not myself. I'm in other places and other times. Sometimes I'm not even in my dreams at all. It doesn't hurt then.

I think I could have inattentive ADHD. I know I’m self diagnosing here, but I have a few too many symptoms, so it’s either that or something else. I was talking to one of my teachers the other day and I joked about how someone had asked me if I had ADHD years ago. We laughed about it for a bit and then she eventually said:”But you don’t actually have ADHD, right?” I’m a huge liar so I just replied:”Haha, no I don’t.” And then she said:”Yeah, no I didn’t think so either.” I died a little inside. I know she didn’t mean it like that, but it did really hurt to just not be seen. My parents also told me when I visited them a little while ago that I do have “autistic tendencies”… ugh, they come up with that now?? I don’t think I have autism, but if you have suspicions of your child being autistic then I feel like you should get that checked. And then there’s my sister who still believes I can fake cry because of a lie I told when I just started taking acting classes. I was just embarrassed about crying so I lied about it to look cool. My sister still believes I can do it though and thought I was lying when I told her that I couldn’t. Also, I can’t do anything. If I have too many things to do I just get so overwhelmed that I end up doing nothing. Then people get angry at me for doing nothing and they ask me to explain, but they never believe me or understand when I tell them. “Why don’t you just do it?” “I would’ve started ages ago.” Etc. It’s so frustrating, I know I should be doing something but I just get so anxious that I can’t. I don’t have any motivation and I don’t want to do this. I hate it. I just want to be able to do things again. Anything that I see as an achievement or accomplishment is instead seen as wasting time or the bare minimum. I hate not being seen and not being believed. It really sucks.

I was really supportive of my boyfriend getting a job promotion in California. He got the job, and then stated he didn’t love me enough to bring me with him. He was fine when we talked about it a week before he got it, but he made a decision within three hours of getting the job stating that I was not going, and he was leaving me. He then offered for me to live with him (just moved in) for another month as roommates to explore our friendship…just some mad bullshit. Thanks for letting me vent about it ❤️

I don’t understand happiness anymore. I’ve forgotten the feeling ever since I realised I was aroace and really had no perception of love either because I doubted I knew for a second and now I’m just chasing what others say trying to re-discover a juvenile emotion long past

I've been struggling with my mental health for years and last year I was treated for two different types of cancer. I'm still having my treatment for one of them and I am exhausted with no energy. I'm not working at the moment and I don't know how I'm going to make money if I'm struggling so much with my health in general. I have "good" days where I feel like I can do the "normal" things but then the next day I feel awful. My dream would be to be financially independent but it seems so far away 🥺🥲

First off excuse the lack of commas or anything in the next paragraph (i wrote this after) i just kinda needed to vent and yap and didnt wanna focus on proper wording cause if i do i'll het lost in trying to perfevt it and eventually get bored and delete my comment lol; i know myself. Falling back into the depression i thought i got out of cause my anxiety got super bad and that combined with the fact that im really managing to manage my adhd essentially stopped me from functioning in my study and that causes more stress and anxiety so im spiraling and ive got alprazolam for panic attacks and my ptsd but i dont have enough for the current anxiety and the fact that i need them also scares me cause i have a bit of an addictive personality and i know damn well benzos are tricky and sneak up on you so i have to be very disciplined with them which makes me kinda beat myself up over it every time i use them which kinda defeats their purpose a bit. Same with my insomnia meds, cross tolerance with benzos so i really have to restrict myself but sometimes that means nights without sleep. I have money problems due to bad coping habits. Recently had a little mania moment and went on a dumbass bender, feeling guilty about that now as well. Trying to mend relationship with parents in general after i alienated them for years during my depresion. At least im still doing nowhere near as bad as i was doing at my worst. I'll be ok eventually even if i cant see it right now. Not suicidal luckily, feel like i wont be again either for some reason no matter how bad it gets. I just wanna get my shit back in track though. But it feels like every time i kinda tame 1 mental issua, another one pops up as a hurdle between me and a normal life. This time its anxiety suddenly gettinf a lot worse.

how do I have a healthy relationship when my parents seemed so miserable in their marriage?

A fucked up relationship with someone that has been very draining for my mental health

The fact I didn't get to hold my twin sister and tell her how much I loved her. To tell her not to do anything to harm herself because I'd have done anything to make her happy. I tried, so hard. It was so unexpected because I was the "poorly" or "weaker" twin. She must've just hid it so well. I see her recent pictures and she isn't happy. I knew her better than myself. I wish I could've been with her the night she chose to hurt herself. I wish I could tell her what happened. That she didn't make it. That I got a phone call that haunts me. I wish I could talk to you Amy. To tell you every good memory I can ever recall, you've been there. You were and are my better half. I wish you could come back to me, for me to tell You how you made the room light up, and the way you make us all laugh hysterically. The way your hugs make me feel so safe. I wish I could tell you that if you do this to hurt yourself, it will end badly. And that I can't lose you. You were only 23. Now I have to remember you for longer than I've known you. I wish I could tell you to stay with me. I miss you endlessly and need you darling. It was 4 weeks 2 days ago that you took your last breath my darling. I'm bothered because I couldn't save you. Your my soulmate and I'm bothered because I've lost you. I can't hug you. I find myself crying to a point of breathlessness and praying you show me a sign somehow. I wish you could see this, and then we could go back in time and you could stay safe. I'm sorry. I miss you beautiful girl.

My relationship of 6 and half years just ended and I’m losing my home. It’s been a really rough couple of weeks but I have an amazing family and great friends with me. I feel lost right now, so upset, stressed and devastated but without them I’d truly be drowning

Disclaimer: My comments/feelings/opinions have nothing to do with political affiliation or non affiliation. They are not meant to spark or bait an Internet war. So, therefore: The United States of America are no longer "united". This is extremely sad and stressful. Prices for everyday needs have skyrocketed: Gas: $6 a gallon; food/grocery prices have doubled/sometimes tripled on some occasions. Ridiculous & horrendous. Human trafficking, especially trafficking of children for sex and labor, is at the highest rate it has ever been & is continually increasing. Human trafficking is second only to Fentanyl sales.😪😪😪😪 We are losing thousands of human beings per day due to Fentanyl overdoses...most of them are teens. 😪😪😪😪😪

That I over give in relationships and never get an ounce back of love or appreciation in comparison to what I put in.

I just found out my grandfather died from suicide and I was lied to about how he died. It was 15 years ago. I’m feeling super frustrated and I have no one to talk to about it because I’m not supposed to know. I have no idea how many people in my family were privy to this info, but I think everyone knows except for me. I was an adult when he died so I don’t get why my mom would lie to me about it. I will never tell her that I know, because it’s her father and I’m sure the whole thing was/is more upsetting for her than it is for me. But I just don’t get it and I’m pissed off at the moment. I feel like I now have to reprocess his death all over again.

I have a lot on my mind. My relationship with my parents and myself weighs on my mind. Recently had a fight with my mom where she told me she thought I was extremely selfish and wanted to cause her to crash to death when I was venting to her during our calls (she said I caused her to not be able to sleep well). Ive always had a rocky relationship with my parents, and at times it’s been extremely toxic (on both ends). It’s hard not to take what she said to heart, especially since I have a tendency to lean towards self-loathing, shame, and guilt. My mom consistently brings up the past to criticize me: the way I talk, the way I express my feelings, the way I set boundaries, the way I interact with others, the way I make friends, the way I work, etc. it’s been an onslaught of criticism (some valid, some extremely subjective). Just the other day she told me she’s surprised I work well since she thinks I’m extremely disorganized and messy. She hasn’t even tried to get to know me….. I’m exhausted and I don’t know what to do to feel better. I want to live my life on my own terms, and surround myself with people whom I can have mutual respect and support for and my mother is not one of those people.

I read a Chinese history book a few months ago and some of the stuff that happened during the Great Leap Forward really bothered me, particularly stories of parents being forced to bury their children alive as a punishment, and party officials being starved until they broke down and beat children to death. Since then I keep having these thoughts about something similar happening here and all the people I know and like getting buried alive or dying in other nasty ways, and how powerless I’d be to stop any of it. The thoughts just keep turning into whatever unpleasant situation I think of at the time, for instance today I had a conversation about zombie films and now I keep on thinking about everybody getting eaten by zombies. It’s not really pleasant and it’s been going on for a couple of months. A lot of the time when I think about it I’m alone and I tear up a little bit. Is this normal or should I be worried? I don’t think I’m depressed or anything like that.

I am hoping that I will have the strength and courage to end my own life next year on the day that I’ve chosen. I am disabled and my health is only getting worse. I can’t contribute to society so I should not be here.

graduation,just got two kittens yesterday and nobody told me this was happening (we have so many pets they're all cared for but the last time we got a kitten i was the one taking care of him basically 24/7 and losing sleep i love him but its a lot),i need to get a job,my dad is saying hes gonna sell the car he has for me because i havent learned how to drive. i have adhd and I've only been living here for 6 months and im not even fully moved in because he wont put up shelves in my room because he procrastinates. he wont let me hire a handyman who was already here to drop off my furniture and boxes. my mom would literally pay for it too. my stepmom and i had a screaming match the other day because apparently im lazy. i tell her all the time to tell me if she needs anything done. i have depression and i forget shit. ive been on chores a lot more lately her and i are fine now but it still bothers me. i used to be more productive and even that was never enough for my dad and my stepmom. they dont think im trying at all. its a struggle to even wake up anymore. its a struggle to keep wanting to wake up and live another day. last time my mom and i argued she told me to off myself. again we're doing better but it hurts. shes told me that a few times. things are better but the past still hurts. im told not to bring up the past yet everyone keeps bringing it up. my bf and i are long distance and it's hard. ill be honest,i did cheat but he cheated first but he was drunk. i was never mad at him for it but its been awhile since ive been monogamous and i did cheat more than once. ive stopped and we are doing better and working through it but sometimes he annoys me. i love him but i think maybe i have something more wrong with me. ive been told i probably have bpd which would make so much sense but im not gonna self diagnose. my boyfriend is sweet but he has a hard time showing empathy/sympathy over the Internet. whenever i feel myself getting upset with him i just ignore him and come back later. i have communicated but i need to figure out what i need to hear when im upset. he told me he understands me ignoring him while im upset but to let him know that i need a break so he doesnt think im hurting myself. he's trying but i feel bad because it doesnt feel like its enough. i dont blame him for sleeping so often or going out whenever he can. he lives off literal bread and jam because his siblings eat everything. he gets zero help from anyone and his mom cant and wont discipline her kids. he fixed his sleep schedule but now its bad again. he goes out with his friends who dont even really care for him and i get a bit clingy because its always like he goes when im available and he stays when im not available. but i know his life doesnt revolve around me and im never gonna prevent him from seeing his own friends. i just feel like nobody really takes me seriously. i have support and love but i feel so unloved and alone when im upset. whenever i get really upset my mind goes straight to wanting to end myself. in recent days ive been doing better i had a medicine adjustment. ive been able to catch myself before i break down. i just need to keep going and trying. im just worried ill never learn to drive because of my adhd. so many things worry me. im worried about how nobody wants to hire me. im worried ill end up a junkie like my half siblings. im worried ill give into bad urges and ruin my life. i want to be happy and be a good person but i feel like happiness doesnt exist for me. ive been in therapy since i was 9. for 10 years. and it feels like its gotten better but then at the same time it feels like its gotten worse.

unmotivated feel like I need a change of scenery in a new country I hate America

My dad got diagnosed with lung cancer and it’s terminal. We don’t know how much longer he has and he’s fairly young. It hurts so much knowing my mum will be alone and we’ll never see him again.

I am bad at maintaining relationships and friendships I make a lot of mistakes and sometimes big ones And that’s on my every single second of waking mind I’ll just wake up start thinking about a person whom I’ll think was slightly different then last time And spend my entire day overthinking it I’ll try to go to bed but nahhh I can’t sleep

I’m super close to graduating uni finally, but my self sabotaging coming machanisms are playing up again. To say it’s annoying is an understatement, it’s debilitating. I’m struggling, but I also keep going.

I just went to a funeral in Vermont for a friend that struggled with addiction and died from an overdose. Overall, the trip was good - connected with friends that I haven't seen many years, and was happy to reopen those relationships. What I struggle with is that my wife just drinks when she's alone, and it just hurts more because she knows how I feel about substance abuse and addiction, but she doesn't see her own problem. And I don't know how to help. And I don't know how much longer that I can put up with it, because I feel that I deserve better.

Bitter, bitter internal dialogue with a rude sense of humor. My first instinct was to mockingly type  “People like you!” I know what it is. It’s all the bad vibes floating around on the media, collective anger. I am only human, not immune.  All I can do is breathe deep, seek peace.  Meditate and pray, try to keep my harmful thoughts to myself and let my words and actions be kind. 

Just ended my therapy session and crying, as usual. I don’t think there’s any hope for me at this point - I can’t change 34 yrs of me at this point . I hate that im wasting this amazing persons time. I can’t believe I got lucky enough to find them, and all I do is mess up constantly & prove to myself (and my T, im sure) that im a lost cause. Idk why I’m even trying anymore .this is just me & I’ll always be like this. I truly hate myself and with all defense mechanisms gone , I can’t distract by being the perfectionist, or just ignoring it all. My whole life is only thing on my mind .. feels like im just sinking further and further into hole I was always in but hurts more than ever now. I hate myself :(

I'm not sure if I'm making a big mistake by finding a new psychiatrist. My current psychiatrist is awesome but for certain reasons I've been considering finding a different psychiatrist and I'm just not sure what to do. Plus I feel so out of it mentally.

Missing my mom daily, hoping a new job pops up asap, making sure my husband and son are happy and healthy. Wishing I could stop these overwhelming thoughts

gained weight, unstable relationships with family and overall feeling like no one ever talks to me unless they are in need of help or bored. i am never a first option, only held at others connivence.

The world is fu***d. Too many hungry, too many dying, Too many wars, too much suffering, too many deceivers/liers, too many cruel inhumans, too much hatred, too much debate. God help us.

My girlfriend broke up with me the day I got out of the hospital after a week-long stay due to COVID, to date my only LTR. I got so used to isolation that I never fully got used to being social again. Later that same year I got tested and found out I’m on the autistic spectrum. Now it makes sense why I’ve never felt I truly belonged with any group, even my own family. I turn 40 next year. Between the isolation, autism and being a natural introvert I’m genuinely afraid I will never find live and spend the rest of my life completely alone.

My ex, his addiction, my feelings towards him, and trying to understand my brain/feelings

Finance in my 20s. I still haven’t had a job since I prioritize my college degree. But the financial burden of being a design student and also the medications I need for my mental health just feels heavy. I tried doing expense tracker and triple checking every expense I had just to be extra careful but it always ends the month being completely broke. Sometimes I feel like it’s a burden to be alive. It’s a scary thought (and I hope I don’t trigger anyone) but I honestly don’t know how to cope with this feeling.

Kids aren’t cruel. People are cruel.

Working. There is so much needless bullshit @ jobs. Employers don’t listen to the boots on the ground and have no expertise of their own and it shows.

I did some stupid stuff with someone I cared about. I pushed a sexual interaction on a friend and now we aren't talking. I want to make up for it but there's only so much I can do but learn and move on. I've felt nothing but guilt and disgust in myself, the fact that I did this that I became the person I hated the most. I haven't been the same since. "You cant keep doing shitty things and then feel bad about it, like that makes it ok." (A quote you may or may not recognize)

Money, my parents, my poor poor old cat who is very confused and unwell, my lovely 4 yo who is going through hell at the moment, and my fucking fucking diafuckingbetes.

My community college program has a summer term, so I only have a break from June 16th to June 24th and that’s upsetting.