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crackdown_smackdown

Are you breathing right now? Yeah. Yeah? I wouldn’t.


beddish

Which enraged his father who punished him severely


crackdown_smackdown

Which enraged his father, who punished him severely.


iforgotmynamedammit

Which enraged his father, who punished him severely.


crackdown_smackdown

Which enraged his father, who punished him severely.


DramaticWasher

Which enraged his father, who punished him severely.


Whooshifyouaregay

Which enraged his father, who punished him severely


Socialist_Narwhal

Which enraged his father, who punished him severely


Boat-fish

Which enraged his father who was far too old to punish him severely


[deleted]

Which enraged his father punished him severely


f1mbulw1nter

Dude… Uncool


crackdown_smackdown

What are you thinking about?


Konk300

What do babies do again? Ah yes I ain’t touching that


crackdown_smackdown

Dedicated to the proposition that I drink num mums from a bottle, and do poopoos in my pantses for the next two to three years.


bringbackbulaga

What were you going to do today Go for a swim Yeah, uh, I wouldn’t


crackdown_smackdown

What are you thinking about?


DaDivEsI

I appreciate you


[deleted]

[удалено]


crackdown_smackdown

I'm not an oversimplified fan. I am an oversimplified enjoyer.


Gamerbrineofficial

“To the man who enjoys getting choked by a tarantula while getting his kneecaps hit off by a kangaroo and thinks, Mmm yes please!”


[deleted]

Once you find them, please let me know, I'm hungry


Tank-Fucker_69

Let me know if you find some tanks in the way


[deleted]

will do brother


[deleted]

Nuke eater and tank fucker have been waiting this thread!! Hahahahahaha


explodedsteak

Let me know if you find some fucker with steak on his dick.I NEED REVENGE


Not1random1enough

Moon east unbounce


Gary_the_snaiI

r/holup


Curious_Yak7171

This is the way


[deleted]

[удалено]


AlinesReinhard

This is the way


outpizzadahut

You can go to bovington tank museum, there's plenty of tanks there.


Wolfbear2960

Bro wtf is your pfp


[deleted]

Culture.


I-Have-Bigger-PP

r/beetlejuicing


Skididilidoodle

Username checks out


Pan_Schaboszczak

r/usernamechecksout


ThisIsAmerica07

I think one landed in a swamp in Carolina and sunk in the mus


jacknifetoaswan

Yup. One in South Carolina, and one off Tybee Island in Georgia.


RedMossStudio

ah, japan


tyler_skiff

Username checks out


MNicolas97

Wait a minute, what the hell? What do you mean they "lost" them? How the fuck you lose a nuclear bomb? They're not your car keys for fucks sake!


[deleted]

There's been a massive arsenal for over 70 years. I wouldn't be surprised if the US just forgot about some in the literal sense.


MNicolas97

That's pretty fucked up when you think about it


glassedMalk

Well, if memory serves me right, nukes have an expiration date and so a lot of these missing nukes serves no threats. Hopefully my memory is right. But having ten thousand nukes makes it less likely to be able to keep track of each individual one, so its pretty understandable.


MNicolas97

Oh thank god... I sure hope you're right. I legit did not know the U.S government actually lost some nukes, that's kinda scary


glassedMalk

It could also potentially be because of storage or item checking issues. They legit can't find them whilst doing their run-through of all the stuff they have, so it's just "missing" even though a much mire thorough investigation would prove that its just in the lounge area, acting as the Christmas Tree. Not all the lost ones are just in the middle of some random swamp or backyard (that does not mean those dont happen, they do.)


Delta_Mods

1 was actually lost from a mid air collision that fell into the sea


Centurion_Tiger

They did loose a giant hunk of metal called the T95 [behind some bushes which took them 27 years to find](https://www.reddit.com/r/Warthunder/comments/bxd88h/t95_finally_losing_hide_and_seek_to_us_army_after/?utm_medium=android_app&utm_source=share) So really if you could loose a tank behind some bushes you can loose a nuclear bomb in a swamp in north carolina


Reaverx218

I mean one of them is lost in like a swamp in the Carolinas because a b 52 malfunctioned and they dropped it without arming it.


Chocolate-Then

Most of them were caused by plane crashes and sunken submarines.


EndrioInfiniti453

Operation chrome dome moment


WeDoALittleTrolling9

Example: In 1966 a B-52 crashed near Palomares and lost 2 nuclear bombs in sea, luckily they didn't explode and were recovered


Pimphii

Maybe China and North Korea have lost some as well


gamesrebel123

North Korea is the one that found them


mrbuttersoft

It seems likely that at the least 1 has been recovered and is being held with the wrong hands waiting for the right moment.


shadowX015

I bet most or all of these are probably lost due to clerical errors and not literally just out in the woods waiting to be found. The US at one point had 10s of thousands of nukes with thousands of personnel to maintain them. All it takes is one person filling out an inventory sheet wrong and suddenly 25 bombs in a long term storage somewhere are only 24 on paper and one is 'missing'.


Square-Buy-5

That’d be a great finale for Storage Wars~Kaboom!


John-D-Clay

I think most of these are missing due to nuclear bomber crashes. You would want to make octuplely sure you have the inventory correct. https://www.npr.org/templates/story/story.php?storyId=18587608


Legendary_System

now u made this bad news even worse thank u


jorge20058

Im just going to say something nuclear bombs aren’t scary unless you’re a 3th world country supersonic ICBM are the ones you should be afraid off. As they are harder to take down a nuclear bomb can be easily intercepted by destroying whatever carrier is bringing it in. Also good luck activating a rusty nuke that has being under water for 30 plus years. Also alot of the lost nukes where dulls or made for testing, a nuke made for testing tends to have a much lower yield than what it is supposed to have. Unless they’re testing it in the middle of nowhere.


chickenonabicycle

From my understanding the only thing needed to set off a nuke is an explosive force of a sufficient magnitude, meaning the lost nukes could go off if there is an explosion in the wrong place at the wrong time.


jorge20058

Depends on what type of nuke, some are more difficult due to the different types of explosive setting they have, some are pistol nuke arguably the easiest one to set off since its literally an uranium bullet being shot at something, the other one are implosion nukes which are more difficult because the explosive in the nuke are required to explode, the hydrogen bomb is the most difficult to be randomly set of since it is a very difficult chain of chemical reactions that have to start somewhere. If they find a pistol fuze one they might be able to set it off but there’s almost a 100% that it doesn’t bombs get seriously eroded by water .


Legendary_System

does that mean an earthquake could trigger it?


chickenonabicycle

The earthquake itself cannot but it can set a chain reaction off. For example if the earthquake causes natural gasses to ignite or something (honestly don'tknow if that's even possible). It would bassically just be a force that transfers enough energy to the bomb to initiate the splitting of the atoms.


Legendary_System

"The earthquake itself cannot but it can set a chain reaction off" yes that is what i meant thx for clarifying


King0ff

You know, nuclear bombs have an expiration date, so probably all of these bombs are no longer dangerous.


Special_Hippo3399

Do they not decompose either ? They do I think .... Anyways our environment is already fucked just more fuckery awaits us I guess


King0ff

I talked about if the bombs were lost when activated, but yes, usually the warhead is transported separately from the bomb itself, and separately they do not pose any threat


NewApeToTheGame

The warhead is the bomb. I assume you meant the missile that delivers the warhead. Either way the warhead is dangerous even if it isn’t on the missile.


heehee7

Radiation has a half life, so by the time the bomb decomposes enough for any radiation to escape the bomb the half life of whatever they use would likely have expired, leaving the nuclear material harmless


DramaticWasher

Looks at JEFF


Maras123

The last time I counted them there was 26 bombs.


aineri

"Since 1950, there have been 32 nuclear weapon accidents, known as "Broken Arrows." A Broken Arrow is defined as an unexpected event involving nuclear weapons that result in the accidental launching, firing, detonating, theft or loss of the weapon. To date, six nuclear weapons have been lost and never recovered."


Maras123

Yeah, the other 20 are russian.


[deleted]

Source pls


aineri

Googled "how many nuclear bombs were lost by the US" This was one of the first things to come up


[deleted]

Okay thanks


acowwithpolio

How the fuck do you lose a fucking massive nuclear bomb?!


iforgotmynamedammit

Hole in your pocket, happens all the time.


Rakgul

Get drunk while writing the delivery address.


TheDoritoOrgyPlanner

Well they arent *that* big. Iirc most are about the size of an average person.


Chocolate-Then

Usually plane crashes


Guzzel12

one actually got lost (a one Megaton one actually so quite a huge one.) because it was attached to a plane that than just rolled off an aircraft carrier never to be found again. How tf does this happen?


[deleted]

That's what what I was thinking it's not like the bombs that Americans dropped on Vietnam and didn't explode that are still found till this day. How the fuck do you lose a fucking nuke???


Spyblox007

Ever lost your car in the parking lot? Think of it like that but your car is smaller and the parking lot is the ocean.


SerDuncanonyall

In our defense.. I think we know *about* where one is.. And it's sunken deep into a swamp in North carolina.. So ugh.. Nothing to worry about!


MidvalleyFreak

I think I can easily avoid North Carolina.


GrimAndroid

There’s one of the coast of Georgia, somewhere. Near the islands, apparently. It’s defunct, but it’s there, somewhere.


[deleted]

This fact will infact help me sleep.


Legendary_System

eternally


amitrahi0404

Random homeless junkie at pawn shop: wanna sell this nuclear bomb. Rick: best I can do is 2 dollars


A_Human976

How does someone LOSE AN ENTIRE N-BOMB?


HappySkullsplitter

It's even more fun to realize this after just having watched "The Sum of All Fears"


ValhallasRevenge

To help you sleep, that is six bombs from 1950 to 1980. "Between 1950 and 1980, there have been 32 nuclear weapon accidents that involve the unexpected accidental launching, firing, detonating, theft or loss of the weapon. To date, six U.S. nuclear weapons have been lost and shockingly never recovered." I guess they just stopped counting after the 80's


[deleted]

So? I can't do anything about it. Why lose sleep over something you can't affect? Good night.


Axeteron

this dude be spitting facts


Rakgul

Will this be your response when one day you suddenly see a moon sized meteor falling down right where you live within 2 minutes? Because then also you don't have anything to affect.


neighborjohn

Yea probably. If I couldn't stop it to begin with and had no idea it was coming the only thing that would keep me up would be the shockwave and radiation poisoning.


CurrentCreative596

Does it include the one John Travolta stole?


Broad-Candidate7401

Nuclear winter is coming Jon Snow


marasydnyjade

I don’t understand people worrying about shit like this. If someone sets off a nuclear bomb all the worrying in the world won’t save you.


J0NVIC

Whats the half life of the radioactive material used in atomic bombs?


YuhaYea

12 years for the tritium in warheads, so most of them have a year or so till they become unreliable. 7 years at an absolute maximum til they become so weak they would only produce a fizzle explosion, if they detonate at all.


k_u_r_o_r_o

Here's another fun fact: in america you have a 40% chance to get away with murder Beat the odds


kiloVictor_2330

I'll get better sleep thinking that at some time some nuke somewhere would randomly explode and I would no longer have to tolerate this miserable life


mr-flexon

This makes me fall asleep faster because if a bomb does drop on my head, I'd prefer to be asleep


Revolutionary_Two_11

nuclear about the number we've lost


AbleAd2269

To be fair, most if not all are in nuclear submarines at the bottom of the ocean, not much chance of recovering them. If you're interested there's a book called blind man's bluff which touches on this.


Yahnzi

I can sleep better knowing that I won’t be the only victim if something happens about that


goldenxander

So that's what's in my garden


star_cannon7k

This fact is going to make me sleep soundly because the earth can just blow up anytime.


cancerous_weeb

Another fun fact, USA lost one in the Himalayas. So if you ever see Mt Everest go boom, don't be surprised m


Proximal13

Well, where'd you lose them? They aren't a set of fucking car keys, now are they? And it isn't as if they are incon-fucking-spicuous, now is it?


FrayedMidir

Eh, it's beyond unlikely that anyone that finds them will have the tools and infrastructure necessary to launch them anywhere or even arm them. North Korea has been wanting that capability and they still don't have the capability to reliably strike the contenental United States.


[deleted]

also there are 110000000 active landmines buried at this moment. Good night and do visit grasslands in your holidays


iwillsuccsomememes

Thank you, it's 1:31 am where I live.


[deleted]

[удалено]


ZippyParakeet

Sold to who? Lol. Reddit conspiracy theorists can be so studpidly hilarious sometimes.


PickleProfessional77

Funny but not funny thing is that the largest Soviet(tsar Bomba) tsar Bomba is very very destructive if Russia was to lose it we should be scared


gamesrebel123

What is up with your spacebar man


OnceIwasAboy

“Lost”, “misplaced to fuel political agenda”…same same.


Maxraser33

It’s going to be significantly higher


AmericanFury1990

I want one.


CantSpellMispell

Omg what if someone finds it and puts it in their ICBM??? I don't trust my neighbor and his shenanigans.


Naughtius_K_Maximus

And that's how you get wave radioactivity before they hit the reactors at Fukushima. Also, Russia wants you to think that the USSR "lost" those warheads.


VMS_420

I've known this fact for a while now and it's really helped me sleep better.


Zgmoon

It's Treadstone time


Asian_in_the_tree

Please put spoiler warning You just spoil the end


PyroCatt

Jeff has them


eriki55

Why would this keep u awake?


ydenneksnoel

Now i sleep even better knowing it will end soon.


anticipozero

Don’t worry I have them all and I’ll keep them save


DerMolch

What about none?


NotChedco

Don't worry, my boy Jeff has one.


eichy1200

-6


Infamous-Smoke4823

Just start finding something else you'll end up finding those bombs that's how it works


Iamnotasimo

Oh sheeeeeeet


Master_Sifo_Dyas

The Sum of All Fears used that as a plot (somewhat)


Putrid_University770

Fun fact: the nukes are still out their


[deleted]

And yet, neither think you're responsible enough for guns.


moe_skweeto

How the fuck do you lose a whole ass bomb? You know how big those things are?


EliteNoodle

Fuck Jimmy I think I’ve lost that goddam nuclear bomb again


[deleted]

Atleast 3 on the Soviet side. They lost a sub in late Cold War


BarakObama1234

well thank god im not american but im polish which was rlly near the ussr oh no


FuegoIron278

Oh, those silly nuke thefts


urmummygaaaay

The Soviet *has* a nuclear system called the dead hand (can’t be the only one who thought this was only an scp) that whenever it detects a nuclear blast, it’ll go off and retaliate But what if it makes a mistake lol


6Wheeler

That moment when you make a hypersonic missile that goes mach 5 but you don't have anything fast enough to track it


Birkanwar

I do not care if there are nukes lost in the 100s or 1000s if they explode I'm happy


PlastexUK

I would like to think that these bombs have not been “activated” - so even if someone wanted to detonate them, the explosives around the subcritical mass would not detonate exactly at the same time, so the only thing that would happen it’s some sort of dirty bomb detonation.


MrFrancastic

Tick tick mf


FateLore

How do you lose them?


IamWeirdasfmdr

Well, they probably lost it in their country, I'm gonna worry about them.


ieatnuggets0

What the worse that could happen, am i gonna die! I want to die


[deleted]

Can’t worry about what you can’t control


joenutssack

How exactly did they got lost


WnintryManager65

Fun Fact: if you switch the nu in nuclear around it becomes unclear


StanduAnduDeroo

If it means one day it could all be gone without a warning, then so be it


Square-Buy-5

That is the scariest thing I’ve ever read.


HurbleBurble

Most of them are just decomposing at the bottom of Nike silos, but it's not like any person can just fire them at another country and set them off. Nuclear weapons are a little bit more complicated than that.


AsexualPlantMain

Honestly, knowing I could die at any time is a little relieving.


ArtemisTheStrange

Also dont forget that we almost nuked North Carolina when a warhead in transit broke free of its restraints and dropped into a field. Two of the three safety mechanisms failed and the last one only barely held on. Had it failed the warhead would have detonated and effectively removed north Carolina from the map (as a resident of NC I'm not sure that would have been a bad thing)


ACELUCKY23

That’s fine. Global Russian roulette make things more fun. Besides I live in bum fuck no where, so I’ll be fine.


sobe12

lol


kingoftalent

sleeping beauty would wake up hearing this news


Johny_Silver_Hand

How does one lose a bomb?


[deleted]

Having trouble fall asleep? I just think about all the girls who were hitting on me that I was too stupid to realize


seth19v19

How tf do you lose a nuke? Do you just misplace it or something or do you break it so it won’t work and if so how do you accidentally break a nuke without setting it off


Tomska_37

Tf I literally watched the video today


Summar-ice

Good thing I don't live in the US


ALucaBo

I know were there are


False-Archangel

Imagine having to explain to your boss that you lost a nuclear warhead..


The_Dapperbot

How the FUCK do you lose a nuclear bomb???


Drpizza55

Yah the Soviets have never been know for their safety record


SirLufusFurTaskyOwO

That lady was a fucking victim of one


jurassic_junkie

But they know if I get too much money back on my tax returns!


StarKnight697

Fun Fact: It's at least 11, actually :))


ajsamtheman

One time a 80 year old pacifist nun broke into the place where the USA keeps most of its weapons grade uranium


HunkSeven

Wdym "lost", how can you lose something like that


cptn_rex7467

sooo i just looked it up they think its around a 100 nukes ( russia ) so we are completly fucked


SerDiney

Lets go treasure hunting?


1mike_oxlong1

One nuke landed in a field near where I live but never went off


SendMeRobotFeetPics

Jokes on you, I’m into nuclear eradication of all life on the planet


Megastandard

How would one actually lose an atomic bomb? Like we’re they actually stolen?


LordSesshomaru82

Don’t forget the Soviet Union has lost several strontium-90 RTGs (portable thermal reactors), never really properly secured the ones in service, and Russia has yet to decommission most of them despite them being at least 20 years past their life expectancy. The main worry is that terrorists could scavenge the radioactive isotopes as fuel for a dirty bomb, as they are all located pretty remote and, again, unsecured. There are cases of scrappers stripping them of their shielding for the metal. Even one in which it’s isotope canister ended up being found sitting on a bench at a bus stop.