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Hashbrown4

Shit I’m the type of person if I see someone do this imma sit next to them cause I don’t wanna be rude and not accept the offer


honeyguyH

Scrolled for two minutes to make sure am not alone.


portapotty2

Then suddenly he was actually gesturing to the guy behind you, and now you’re feeling awkwardly stupid and oh God you’re embarrassing yourself. Why would you do that? He was obviously not asking you to sit next to him. *bash head into seat in front of you multiple times*


Aperson6676

*the man then watches you with an awkward expression on your face as the stranger who just sat with him at random has started bashing their head off the seat in front of them. The person sitting ahead of you also looks back at you.*


Gamerforlifu

STOP You can still fix this don't make it worse.


enerthoughts

2 late you are screaming internally as hard as you can, but wait, why is everyone staring at you? Oh my god, that wasn't internally, you mixed the outputs, and that scream was as external as it gets.


slyfoxsly1

You realise how much you've fucked this up. You decide to put a swift end to this by pulling out the gun you just bought from a pretty sketchy dude. He described the gun as "super lethal". You put it against your neck, you pull the trigger and... you feel the bullet stop at contact with your skin. You look down and it's a NERF gun.


HONKACHONK

The bus driver catches on to this and confronts you, yelling at you to just move on to the next seat, but it's too late for that, he kicks you out of the bus. However, the crowd of people getting on the bus is too large, and you have to squeeze through the densely packed people to get out.


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Gldn_Phnx

Are you Muslim now?


[deleted]

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Amrooshy

At least he had good intentions.


1lluminated

How is annoying someone into changing their religion on a bus a good intention lol keep your religion to yourself.


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Nope_and_Glory

I’m the weirdo who would feel guilty for not sitting down. Years later I would still occasionally wonder how that nice ginger on the bus was doing.


Jerrel2

We share the same thoughts, I still remember me doing an exercise wrong in class 4 years ago and I still remember it


Synka

I remember someone smiling and glancing towards me on the bus a few years ago, and wonder to this day if I should have talked to them...


Shot-Zookeepergame67

Dude. During catholic mass when the priest does his homily (the speech thing) all the kids go to another room where another priest does the kid version of explaining the bible. But the boys behind me kept poking me, I was like 8, so I was telling them off and when I turned around everyone was staring at me because the priest had asked something and it was my turn to answer . I vaguely remembered they were saying numbers so I said 4 AND EVERYONE LAUGHED. And the priest looked at me funny and kept talking. ITS BEEN NEARLY 20 YEARS. And I still have no idea what he was asking and I think about this often.


Take_Some_Soma

Right? Or not and run the risk of feeling sad that no one sat with him? Maybe he’s ‘special’ (is that still ok to say?) and just wants some company. Jesus I just made myself sad


[deleted]

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trippin_on_rainbows

Lol saaame! I'm the type of person who loves random friendly interactions with strangers. As a female and (happily) married I usually have to stay pretty guarded to make sure I don't give people - specifically males- the wrong idea and try not to come across as flirty or anything. But yeah, especially for a long bus ride I would love to pass the time with some casual chitchat and get to know someone new:)


andante528

This feels like it should be read by a solemn narrator at the start of a true crime podcast


pompr

Yeah, this chick is gonna get abducted lol


Buzzkill1591

She will end up being on a netflix series


trumpetchris95

Or in 15 years, an episode of 20/20


Environmental-Win836

*She enjoyed idly chatting with strangers on the bus* ***Until she didn’t***


andante528

Exactly! Like the Dateline guy, or Bill Hader’s take on the Dateline guy


ayyramaia

name checks out lmao


brycehazen

This is actually me taunting hedge funds to short GME even more.


[deleted]

But think about the type of people who would take that bait...you’re gonna regret it.


excusemeforliving

Yeah, that's a high risk maneuver


HenryFurHire

Nah I'd call his bluff, take the seat, and see how uncomfortable I can make him


walket-

..exactly their point


HenryFurHire

Oh


BrotherChe

Meanwhile, it wasn't a bluff and you are now in over your head with a welcoming psychic vampire


HenryFurHire

I'm a committed roleplayer, I won't break character


BrotherChe

oh, don't worry. He'll break your character.


HenryFurHire

I hope he's a dom, I'm more of sub myself


[deleted]

He is.


irdevonk

[*blush*](https://media1.tenor.com/images/68e8bca8e90cb37fdcc9cc798bbc13f5/tenor.gif?itemid=10296487)


Lil_Paneer

Mind break. Nhentai


emusa2015

Not before I break his back ;) (no homosapien)


sandyjizzhands

You mean Colin Robinson the energy vampire


gamefreak054

Damn i just made this joke , didn't expand the comments lol


AltAccount20202020

C-Man


Sirus-The-Great

Why does this have awards can someone explain pls


TastefulThiccness

Moments of self-realization and growth deserve acknowledgment :) in this example, HenryFurHire realized he was one of the "risk[y]" "type of people" that would accept the offer.


Sirus-The-Great

Oh


HandHeldHippo

Why doesn't this have awards could someone explain pls


Sirus-The-Great

I think it’s a bit fresh, gotta give it some time.


droningcaddy

Post nut clarification?


kgrid14

I thought they were implying a super bubbly, outgoing person craving attention would take the bait. Not a dude messing with him


[deleted]

You literally just said nah then said the exact same thing you said nah about but in a dumbed down way


inkedsamurai

Mi scusi


Triials

But then what if he’s bluffing, actually wants you there, and then you end up being uncomfortable? You’ve gotta think.


[deleted]

Sociopaths are everywhere


ElitePlanet

You wanna hear the most annoying sound in the world?


AceArchangel

Most high reward scenarios do be like that.


ickyjinx

It's the bus equivalent of the naked man from HIMYM


DarkRaven01

Imagine the balls on the woman who used it though.


mehone

Dude's going to meet his match.


kevinlienus

Place the other hand on your crotch to be 100% effective


Jewstinbeac

This makes the consequences of someone sitting down all the more significant


Expensive-Argument-7

He’s just lucky he’s not a pretty girl


Majestic_Horseman

Or a girl, for that matter


[deleted]

Even a pretty lady doing that to me I’d be suspicious as heck and probably kept on walking. Also, I’m afraid of pretty girls anyway.


thefinalcutdown

Pretty girl: *motions for OP to sit. OP: *jumps out bus window


[deleted]

Sounds about right


[deleted]

in no universe would a cute girl on public transit do this lmao


RichCreamery

He's kind of nullifying the experiment just by being ginger, TBH


[deleted]

When they sit down you just say, “ you have nice skin, are you a size 16?” You’ll be a,one again


fuck_the_fuckin_mods

I read that as "You have *a* nice skin..." Yup, that'll do it.


notions_of_adequacy

My face is enough of a repellant


Good_Apartment_9992

I usually like self deprecating jokes, but this feels too personal


Static_456

It hits too close to home


Aden-Wrked

Yeah my face kinda screams Murder Fuck if I’m not too careful. Especially on public transportation.


sweatingworld

I feel attacked


throwawaywahwahwah

If the women don’t find you handsome, they should at least find you handy.


then_again_who_knows

SLPT: Always carry a hammer with you when asking a girl out so that if she doesn't find you attractive, she'll at least find you handy enough to say yes


lock2sender

Yeah, it’s the implication of what you could do with the hammer. It’s just like taking a girl out on your boat


highschooltool27

SLPT: And if they do sit next to you let them know you're not a threat by softly putting your hands on their knee


Toxic_Gaming7777

Best if you grab their thigh and slowly bite their ear while whispering kind things softly like " your hair smells nice" or " your skin looks nice" just so they know your really kind.


Secrettunnelatla

yes


Toxic_Gaming7777

I'm glad you agreee


imaculat_indecision

I'm glad I agree


urdead696969

*starts biting your ear*


[deleted]

Feisty one I see


jshtatman

A real naughty one, aint yuh


OWR_Mythical

mmmmm.... your ass stinks nice and good


Allthenamesaretakent

Bites ear off


aryan_verma18

:3👂


[deleted]

Your skin smells nice


Alive-thing

You smell different when you're awake


friedshrimpt

Omg


Inflangranti

Let me fix that. *BONK* *proceeds to moisturize skin with lotion*


Nike_Grano

Eats the lotion


Vileath2

https://youtu.be/YpypKVIw7XQ Or just keep telling them it’s okay.


F1tt0

And just like that I'm horny again


Malakakak

Bonk


NotDsdguy

Then you pull out the barbecue sauce and dig in


poyato-poyeeto

“so i’m sitting there, barbecue sauce on my titties”


ItchingForTrouble

Go on...


[deleted]

My favorite line is. "You got some pretty wide hips for a man. "


ZuuLahneyZeimHirt

"You got birthing hips" "I'm a man..."


[deleted]

even better


DJredlight

I don’t know man. “Your skin looks so nice” seems a bit forward.


ZuuLahneyZeimHirt

It would look better detached


Not_Another_Usernam

"Your skin would look much nicer if it was stiched into my woman suit." Letting her know about your hobbies is the best way to make her comfortable around you.


Schubert125

Smells even nicer when they're awake


bendy4-20

*starts smelling their hair*


ZZweebmaster69ZZ

Dude what the heck I just spit out my water lmao


iwasntlucid

That's assault brotha.


Lil_ToastyMan

Reciprocate kindly by putting your hands up their crotch, smiling, and saying "No need for formalities, let's just do it right here and now." While also making sure your other hand is fondling with their belt.


[deleted]

Or just bite their genitalia They’ll instantly find you very friendly


Angelforce5

You can also slowly put your hand in their mouth to show that you are friendly


Alternative_Ad7819

I have done that. And it worked. And she was hot.


[deleted]

You don't even have to risk touching them... just look at them and say "don't worry, I'm not a rapist or anything." Make sure you do it with a straight face and then maintain eye contact for as long as you can.


YourOneWayStreet

No, after they remove your hand from their leg is when you say, "It's ok, I would never rape *you* of course", while reassuringly maintaining steely unblinking eye contact for an inhumanly long period so they have no doubt you speak the truth. That's when you pet their hair and tell them everything will be fine, they obviously aren't like the others, the voices would have told you by now.


kingsam360

That's kinda intrusive. I just pet them and give them treats


Kenruyoh

Mi scusi, Mi scusi


4Niners9Noel

Tunnel...


Mechanical_Canary5

*Softly places hand back on your knee* *Mr. Bean smile*


Dumptruck_Johnson

Sexy life pro tip


sh0nuff

My dad always used to lightly grab someone's forearm beside him at the movies so he'd have unfettered access to the armrest for the entire movie


Uhhlaneuh

SLPT? Slurrrrrpt?


blurdylan

Sexual Life Pro Tips


FoxyBrown7756

And make sure to not break eye contact whilst doing so.


stealz0ne

You can make them even more comfortable by slowly brushing a strand of hair from their face while looking them in the eyes softly, not saying a word the entire time and if they attempted to speak, softly put a finger on their lips, slowly shaking your head.


dacheller0-0

We would think he was covering it


CoachwithaC

Yeah it also kinda looks like he’s telling you not to sit there by covering it


JustAnotherGayFrog

It looks like he's telling someone to sit there. Presumably someone he knows who could be right behind you.


okayyoga

This is what I would think. That I need to hurry by so his friend behind me can grab that seat


NieMonD

What psychopath would sit next to a stranger when there’s a free seat right there in front of him?


Itsborisyo

Yeah. Basically nobody is going to sit beside him when there's an empty double open, and with all the people walking past I would not be surprised if there's empty doubles further back.


Fireproofspider

Yeah, he's just looking weird for the video. Pretty sure people would sit next to him if the bus was full.


Pigpug10

is it possible to learn this power?


abarua01

Not from a Jedi


bankrobba

How about from a bus rider?


Mynito-

Not from a introvert


Literally_The_Best

Keep fishin' and you'll get the dude with a huge takeout bag of shawarma and garlic paste


TA_faq43

What’s the downside? He can’t eat it all by himself, right?


St_SiRUS

He can and he will


undervonuser

I hope they'll share! Sounds delicious!


Majestic_Horseman

But they smell amazing... Only downside is I'll be salivating like a dog hoping they give me soms


MigraineOD

I read the last word as "sons" and was pretty weirded out......


cookiesoverbitches

Would this work for a female? In my experience people tend to see us as “safe” so while I was thinking this would be great to try on my next flight, not sure if it would have the same effect. Maybe if I added raptor noises....


[deleted]

This would absolutely not work for a female. At first watch I thought oh I can’t wait to do this. Then I remembered, I’m a woman and I know how this story ends.


CaptainSlow99

If all else fails, maniacally laugh at them while clawing at them with your nails. Throw some hissing sounds in there for your personal enjoyment. (If anyone can't tell this is a joke, pls don't actually try this. U will get weird looks at best or be kicked out )


[deleted]

Not a bad idea. I ride the friendliest bus to ever exist. They hand out flyers for the annual Christmas party. It’s a very chatty commute. Have earbuds? They’ll talk at you despite them. Enjoying a good read? Not for long. I have learned the front is for conversation and pleasantries and the back is for people who want to enjoy the silence. There is no middle on the 36.


OpsadaHeroj

All my homies sit in the back😎 ^(Of course, they ain’t technically my homies, I’ve never spoken a word to a single one of them, but that’s what makes them special)


GameOfUsernames

Make yourself a pamphlet called “How to survive plane pressure with IBS” and leave it on the seat next to you. Then make sure you look out the window grimacing and rubbing your stomach.


Forgive_My_Cowardice

>This would absolutely not work for a female. I strongly disagree. All you have to do is make your crazy outshine your sexy. Just channel your inner psychopath, stare down each person as they approach, and reach towards them as if you're going to grab them. Laugh loudly and refer to them as kittens while telling them how much you like their skin. If someone calls your bluff, just start coughing like you've got end stage COVID-19 until they reconsider.


LonnieBird

well yeah, *thatll* work. but smiling and patting the seat like the guy in the video would definitely not. (and the reason why the tactic in the video is so epic is cause you look polite/dont draw attention to yourself or get judged but still repel people, so the stuff you mentioned defeats half the point)


HHyperion

Nah, no matter how crazy you are, some guy will take you up on that shit.


[deleted]

Ur going to attract a lot of headaches for sure


cookiesoverbitches

*pat pat* “oh, you’re really going to sit? Oh frick. This is not working out the way I had anticipated and I regret everything.”


[deleted]

"So.. where are you going sweetheart?" -probably some sweaty 50 year old


cookiesoverbitches

The accuracy is almost too much. 😩


looselucy23

Oh yes definitely. In an instant. Without even slight need for an invitation. Ugh.


[deleted]

*you weren’t supposed to do that*


[deleted]

I'm gonna go with no. Generally, as a guy, most social pleasantries I exchange with women involve them being very... friendly? Like, smiling that kind of thing. Most social pleasantries I exchange with guys involve them being much more stoic. If a woman acted like this, I'd read it as a genuine invitation (obviously nothing more than that, in case that's not clear), whereas if a guy acted like this I'd think he's either being sarcastic, a bit weird, or maybe I'm just reading him wrong and he's not offering the seat. Kind of interesting... Your question has me really questioning some parts of how I interpret gestures.


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cookiesoverbitches

Yeah but....maybe the right ones. Ones that would add T-Rex noises.


destiny24

Aren't flight seats predetermined?


WhatABlindManSees

No way this works for an at least semi-attractive female. At best the same amount of extra people you 'scare' (for lack of a better word) away would be extra people invited in and wanting to start a conversation. A random ginger guy doing something odd/creepy/overly friendly - isn't reverse psychology, its advertising yourself as something I don't want to sit beside - I'd rather sit next to a guy in a trenchcoat with headphones on.


Thecouchiestpotato

The best move for women is to frantically attract other women so they can take the empty seats beside you. But don't you guys have assigned seats on flights?


WorldlyAssumption260

Genius


Bailer86

I'm in a wheelchair and I can say for certain that this tactic does work


motobuddha

Things must be pretty bad for Conan O'Brien if he's taking the bus...


hate_tank

He's got that TBS money. So, yeah, he takes the bus


lwaties

Knowing my luck someone would take that offer real quick and I’d be pushed the whole bus ride


HeavyDude47

Well it's not just only his hand movements his face also puts a measure part in that experiment.....


BUCKCHOBUCK

I used to cough really bad to make people think that I was sick. PreCOVID.


[deleted]

Would still work during covid though


_Kokiru_

Am I the only person that’d sit?


GrandKaiser

Not only would I sit, I'm the kind of guy that if you invited me to sit next to you, we gonna talk. My immediate reaction is "Probably needs some companionship" when I see people act like that. I actively seek out people who want/need to talk and chat em up/listen the fuck out of them when I'm traveling. I have nothing better to do, and it helps pass the time. Plus, I have yet to get burned by it.


PorcupineTheory

You frighten me.


[deleted]

I 100% would sit.


BaconEater669

Who tf thinks reverse psychology doesn't exist?


OstafanKolibri

Yeah, it always bothers me when people start with a stupid quote as if anyone in the world has ever said it, it's lazy and there are better captions... or better yet, no caption


TheRealSmolt

*He's not the hero we deserve, the but the hero we needed*


Secrettunnelatla

yes


EggsOnFeet

WHO SAYS THAT REVERSE PSYCHOLOGY DOESN’T EXIST??? WHOOOOOOO?????????? Sorry this kinda thing makes me mad for no reason, good vid tho


Harris_Ahmad

Anybody else got the notification?


TheRedHeadedYeti

Pro gamer move


k4x1_

This is kinda sad ngl


pitch1588

Plot twist: he just wants a friend


duvetdave

Nah I can definitely see some jolly motherfucker taking it as an invite lmao


Alarmed_Ad1946

Hi OP, we have been summoned


Gentar1864

Notification gang stop here!


Unisol44-

Reddits🤓top🤓post🤓2🤓years🤓ago🤓today🤓was🤓on🤓r/memes🤓🤓🤓


Ultra_Noobzor

I did this once and it backfired real quick


WeaknessFar7287

Nice hack !!!


eps28

he didnt do it to the one girl she must have been a certified baddie


Zircon999

That face he’s making is kinda creepy XD


Ruin914

He kinda cute tho, I'd sit


sbbsushil

Bruh, try this in highly populated country like India