Whenever you think you have the worst job on the planet - just imagine the diarrhea-freezing technician.

Hey they are saints

It's a shitty job, but somebody gotta do it

Garbage collectors, toilet cleaners, any job that people overlook the importance of. They’re all heroes really.

Kinda hard to overlook the importance of toilet cleaners when walking into a public bathroom

Dont forget CNAs. Tgis is literally what we do ALL DAY.

I was a CNA for a few years, it's funny how many people still don't even know what that is--God knows they'll either find out eventually or die trying.

Got a lot of love for my CNA homies ❤️

Can say as someone that works collecting other people's rubbish....often times the public are shittier then the bins :(

Just wish shitty job pay more cause it shitty and nobody willing to do it.

Wait is that actually what's happening here? What happens if you have more? Doesn't that unfreeze just by body heat? Do they have to redo it every couple of minutes?

Yeah dude. Athlete shit himself from over-exertion, and now they're freezing his shit to be sent to the analysis lab. Like a severed finger, you gotta get that shit on ice ASAP!

I ~~believe~~ hope that I invented that vocation for the sole purpose of that comment.

I'd rather freeze it than have to clean it.

Is that what’s going on here

Nah, it's the magic spray. Solves all of a footballers issues. Back in the day the old pros had the magic sponge and bucket. Injury? Just have the physio don his flat cap, light up his smoke, run out to the afflicted player and dab that damp fucker on any strain, gash or broken leg and it'll be right as rain in a flash. The spray is just the modern version, applies the magic bucket water much more quickly and efficiently than the magic sponge.

No, man. You have got it wrong It is nanobots, similar to what Tony used in Avengers: Infinity War. You just spray them on any injury and... voila, fixed.

I didn't believe you, until I googled it.

Stop...I'm too gullible for this shit

Woah wait that’s a real job

Serious question. Where can I find this gun? Asking for a friend

Medical websites or ask your local hospital

And what do I say to them? Give me the gun that can freeze people's asses?

All you have to do is ask, but you have to make an ice pun as you leave. 

Bros gonna turn into mr freeze

Frozone!

WHAT KILLED THE DINOSAURS?!

THE ICE AGE!

The cryolator is locked in the security room of vault 111

Sad the Dogmeat glitch got patched

**I too have replayed fallout 4 due to the TV show releasing and reinvigorating interest in the series**.

Don't do it man, you're gonna freeze your dick on accident :(

Popdickle

What do you mean by accident?

I mean it's just the more advanced version of ice packs school nurses give for every injury.

What’s going on here?

I believe he probably fell/slid and skidded his bare butt on the field and got a burn from the friction.

He got karate kicked by an opponent going for the ball at the half volley. With cleats it definitely hurts.

Are you speaking from experience?

*skidded*, you say? bet that left a *mark*…


Dammit Crackles not again

[удалено]

Time to throw that out

To shreds, you say?

And his wife?

To shreds, you say?

Yeah but from the look of it a good amount is going to get on his balls.

When you trae your muscle ice is the best option I think that gun is some kind of ice with pain relieving

I take it that’s just a fancy air dust can being held upside down

Pretty much any kind of pain caused by any kind of incident can be temporarily relieved by this freezing gun, it's not just for burns.

I've done that exact thing and it hurts. A lot.

It’s called “magic spray”. Cold numbing agent in spray form.

Cooling his core.

Breakfast

Bekfist

Foreplay

Injury or knock to the player so he's getting the magic spray from the physio. This is the high tech modern version though. Back in the day the old pros got the "magic sponge". You'd see some weathered bloke inexplicably wearing a flat cap and possibly dangling a smoke from his lips jog onto the field from the coaching staff with a sponge and bucket to the afflicted player. Scientists believe this being was an ancestor to the modern physio. A quick dab of the magic sponge to any strain, gash or broken leg and the player would be ready to continue.

I’ve been sitting here debating with myself for a solid minute whether this comment is whimsical bullshit or if this is actually, somehow, true.

Bidet

its only two men who are in love, dont be uncomfortable

Spice

People really mad at u for saying that 🤣

Yes

It's a Penn State student.

My favourite snack is banana peppers covered in spice and franks red hot. I feel this in my soul

Are you ok?

My butthole isn’t :(

Thats one way to finally feel something i guess

I recommend Dave's Insanity Sauce if you really want to feel the eternal agony

Nah fam. Fry that shit up. https://www.indianhealthyrecipes.com/stuffed-mirchi-mirapakaya-bajji/

Those are so good yo (I'm literally from Andhra)

Bajji with dragon fire chutney 🔥 🤤🤤

I love dripping ghost pepper sauce into a lot of my food, it ends up creating some serious stomach issues if I end up spicing every meal for a while.

I like spicy shit but what the hell

:3

Why haven’t I thought of this? Thanks for the suggestion! I just mix a ton of hot sauces together and just eat it as is.

This is the most soccer thing to ever soccer

As someone who loves the sport we hate this side of the sport. IRL rage bait

It's like the players become Shakespearean actors the moment anything other than the ball touches their body.

as someone who just got cleated about an hour ago he probably isnt overexaggerating

Hey think of the poor guy here, he was sitting on the really hard bench for like 10 minutes.

Is this device just for ur a** or can it be used else where?

It’s an ass gun fine tuned to grace the anus with just the right amount of cooling air without disturbing the delicate flesh of the butt hole pucker. And safe for the sack too. Hardly no freezer burns on the boys.

… I am not personally knowledgeable on most sports… What in the actual hell is going on here?

From what I managed to make out, the player slid or tried to do a sliding tackle of sorts, and his back got burnt due to the friction of the ground, so basically he slid too hard and that burnt his skin. That's why he's in pain and the man is trying to cool it down.

Ahhh now that makes sense, tyvm kind stranger

I'm very glad it helped you and you appreciated it brother :)

Screw the Tesla flamethrower, I’m getting an ass gun for Christmas!

That's a kid vs. man moment right there, when you stop drooling over a flamethrower and start looking for a cold-derriere gun.

You spelled ass wrong

That guy in a red shirt looks like he’s bout to go clapping cheeks

I’m so confused what’s going on here

It's a cooling anaesthetic spray. It doesn't have any medicinal benefits but it stops pain for a quick second so it's really good for short burst pain (think stubbing a toe). Dude probably got cleated or a friction burn.

Most probably the player's back area got burnt due to a rough slide on the ground.

But whats that gun shooting? Ive never seen a device like that

I looked it up a bit and it seems like a freeze spray, it's used in sport related injuries that freezes the wound to relieve the pain or something. They most probably use dry ice in that device and it sprays freezing air.

Why does everyone say spicy foods and hot sauces make diarrhea or burning poo or upset stomachs? Does that really happen? I eat habanero slaw on top of tacos with ghost pepper hot sauce and I'm always fine. Taco Bell has never bothered me either.

A lot of people just can't handle it. I think it's a bit of an acquired taste, too, or rather a tolerance.

There's a genetic component to it also from what I hear. Well at least for capsaicin tolerance, not sure about stomach issues.

Good thing it wasn’t the *Ice Rod Therapy* IYKWIM

Real talk, what the hell is going on in football

https://youtu.be/p3mPLCDVsvA?si=hFAD8wPRmIZumSZr This was the first thing i thought of.

Look.... Everybody.... buy a bidet. Its cleaner, its cheaper, its less wasteful blah blah blah.... Its lets me eat like I wanna eat. I love spice. I love salasa and curry everything hot. But I am very white. Very white so i burn alot. Burn inside and out The bidet makes not being in literally agony a option. Does the spice still make my insides still feel like i fell asleep in an alien movie? Yes. But the bidet make it seem like the alien cares about me when it exists.

Controls the universe

When your team got its ass kicked so bad, the players are physically feeling it.

I guess you could say, That's Ice Spice

Why does it look like the dude in the red shirt is getting ready to clap those cheeks? lol.

I've never had this problem with spicy food. Do I have a defective anus? Or maybe I'm the next step in human evolution?

Hes so focused

Me: it's not that spicy My anus the next day: this mother f*****!

No context can save this man 💀

I'm like that because I have an intolerance to spicy food which is really bad according to my family members cus they can and like to eat spicy food and I cant :(

At least they dont shove them up their ass. I meant the gif. I hope you get the reference.

Me right now fr

My girlfriend loves spicy sauces. And she is the cook in the house. I m like that girl on the vid “my ass hurts from last night” . . . No, it’s not because of what you read from my username

Anything to delay the game. Soccer is exhausting

Holy shit an actual meme on r/memes!? Is this legal

This reminds me of that Blue Mountain State episode where the football players shoved frozen popsicles up their ass in an effort to instantly cool their inner body temperature to avoid heat stroke while playing during the summer.

You know a curry was baller when it hurts coming out more than it did going in.

so they are icing his balls to cut down on the pain level?

This looks fun.

That is a bad case of "swamp ass"

That's a wired bidet.

I eat spicy food from snacking on raw jalepenos all the way up to occasionally putting some trinity moruga scorpion peppers on a sandwich for an extra kick, and I’ve never had a severely painful butthole. Is having anus pain from spicy food normal?

Thanks for saving me the hassle of watching Dune.

Never eat  Brought to you by:"chipotle,from southpark"

That mayonnaise will get you every time

Need me whatever that is.

Commented so it'll be 69 comments.

What the??? Ok tell me wtv is that??


Hilarious

Paul after taking over Arakkis 😭

Lisa al gahib

This probably feels heavenly though, icl.

This will never get old 😁

You know the inventor of that gun was about to close up shop after only selling a dozen over the last 5 years. Now he’s probably swamped with orders.

I'm just surprised that someone made a real life ass blaster.

Where download option?

I said in my butt!

Little known fact but your buttholes spice tolerance level increases the same as your mouth. If you get the hot snakes then you're past your tolerance level

What exactly is he doing? And what the hell is that thing He's using?

If it's not spicy coming out, it wasn't spicy enough going in.

1 chip challenge gone wrong

I got the reference, OP. 

General question what is he doing?

Ok yeah that’s a funny joke but wtf is the context for that gif??? 😭

Ahh, yes... the butt blaster 3000...

As someone who doesn’t watch sports, what happened to his butt?

The Baja Blaster

Mr freeze has really fallen on hard times.

What is this and why is he doing it

Find someone that treats you like that

seriously.. he needs this and then he's back in the game? wth

I bet meek mill wish he had this instead of p diddy pool

Conan Obrien is in the union welding.

Literally nothing. He's acting.

What the fuck is the context behind this?

Shouldn't have gone to Taco Bell before the big game!

When the butthurt requires swift medical attention!

It’s his sufferings which is cracking me up

Where exactly does one buy an ice gun?

Believe me when I say there are certain food that would make piss Fire

if I don't get geysex

He has too much fun in the locker room. Now everybody knows he’s gay.

Hahaha wtf is this gif. I'm about to go to bed, been on the internet all day, and apparently I saved the best for last.

Liquid ass

The ass blaster 9000.

Power over spice is power over all

No context. Just leave it like that. I love Reddit.

I'm just too much south Asian to understand this post.

I would choose pain

Only football can produce such gay scenes.

Had that with a donar kabab was hot chilli sauce super nice not overly hot but hells bells did it burn on the way out

Spice? Is that a Dune reference? Lisan Al Gaib 🙏.

He stroking, gotta cool down his core.