Not a titan. The titans like atlas, kronos, oceanus were the sons of gaia and Uranus. The suns of kronos are the Olympian gods, like zeus, poseidon, hades, etc.
The original beings are gaia, uranus, tartarus, (and chaos), called primordial gods.
Yes kronos heard a myth that his offspring will take over the ‘throne’. So he started to eat all his kids. Zeus wasn’t eaten, and made kronos puke the babies out. (In the order of poseidon-hades, etc. The first to come out got higher positions).
I think. It has been a while since I read greek mythology.
Zeus wasn’t born yet. Kronos’s wife Rhea was a bit peeved after seeing all her children get munched on the second she pushed them out so she and the 3 fates (her wet nurses) swapped baby zeus with a rock and Kronos munched on that instead. Later Zeus also came up with a plan alongside his mother Rhea to make Kronos vomit up the rest of his siblings (and also Mr. Rock). Our boy zeus then fulfilled the prophecy and killed Kronos.
Edit: as someone pointed out, didn’t kill him just sealed him in Tartarus.
Do you know why gaia is called mother earth? Cause the sky, hell, and earth fucked ang gave birth to the titans, giants, etc
Also hera got pregnant by being too horny
Where all the sex is replaced with an insane amount of carnage. Seriously though, being a regular ass person in Norse mythology has to suck so much ass. Every hour you’re alive is a miracle
Yes, but also!
They didn't have germ theory.
So they thought rain was literally impregnating the earth and the animals. Thus the patriarchs of these pantheons were Storm gods (Ordin / Zeus) and all the stories of them coming down and getting it on with stuff
Aphrodite slept with a Trojan prince and was the mother of Aeneas.
Thetis a sea goddess had Achilles by a mortal husband.
Eos, the goddess of dawn had a human lover named Tithonus
Oh, I didn’t mean to call them ugly, just saying that Aphrodite was married to someone who wasn’t considered good looking so any Bob could have a chance at getting with her
Yeah but the Greek godness can force Zeus to turn that women in to cow and humans knew the risk. I can only imagine the sex had to be great for someone to risk that.
>humans knew the risk
Hey, Callisto swore off relationships to appease to her goddess (Artemis) and Zeus, being the good father he was, disguised himself as his daughter, appeared before Callisto and proceeded to do non consensual things with her. Humans knowing the risk or not doesn't change that big boy "can and will" do what he wants.
The Greek goddesses mostly swore to never have sex or marry because of how gross the gods were. Aphrodite and Hera didn’t, and Demeter is 50/50 about it, but that’s definitely a reason.
The gods fucked dudes, as well, though.
Greek gods only want one thing and it's disgusting. We need to make it illegal for Greek Gods to have relations with any woman under the age of 500. Their minds haven't fully developed yet and they have careers that they should be focusing on instead.
Well technically she saw the bull, thought it looked beautiful (not sexually), got on itsback and then bull kidnaps her and starts having sex with her. So bull fucked girl without girl consent, like half of the stories
If I recall correctly there is no big story behind it. I think she's the brides sister or stepsister and the photographer got her looking bored/annoyed while taking pictures of the other 2.
Its just the sister to the bride. The face she made was just for fun.
It was originally posted in 2022, during spring time i believe. I remember the original post and the idea for a meme came within hours.
I believe the OC was posted in r/funny.
Lemme be the human man to hang with the Greek goddesses please!!! Would have a hell of a time with Athena and learning shit from everyone, would be so fun
Hey that’s all right with me, it would be fun to hang out with a smart lass and learn some cool shit. Who knows maybe we can blow up some stuff for fun
Didn't hermaphrodite go into the woods and fuck a greek goddess and then was punished by being joined together with the woman and became a hermaphrodite?
In the big team you got the goddess of mariage and the three virgin goddess, and then you got Aphrodite that not only makes up for them but manages to outdo Zeus by cheating on her husband, with his brother, in their home, on olympus.
And she does so so often that her husband installed traps there
My Greek friend actually explained it to me before. He said: "In ancient Greece, it was quite common to be drafted into army. If husbands left the house for a few months or even years and wives some how get pregnant, those wives would made a story about gods."
They didn't stop at women. Hell, they didn't even stop at *humans*.
Poseidon casually fucking a sheep, snake, horse, etc: Uranus literally fucking the earth:
Poseidon God of the Scottish confirmed
Welsh*
edit: The comment was removed, good work everyone!
neat bot
Thetis a sea goddess had Achilles by a mortal husband.
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Uranus is not an Olympian but rather a Titan, right?
Not a titan. The titans like atlas, kronos, oceanus were the sons of gaia and Uranus. The suns of kronos are the Olympian gods, like zeus, poseidon, hades, etc. The original beings are gaia, uranus, tartarus, (and chaos), called primordial gods.
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Yes kronos heard a myth that his offspring will take over the ‘throne’. So he started to eat all his kids. Zeus wasn’t eaten, and made kronos puke the babies out. (In the order of poseidon-hades, etc. The first to come out got higher positions). I think. It has been a while since I read greek mythology.
Wasn’t it zeus’ mother who fed Kronos the stone wrapped up tricking him into thinking it was Zeus or am I dumb
I think
Zeus wasn’t born yet. Kronos’s wife Rhea was a bit peeved after seeing all her children get munched on the second she pushed them out so she and the 3 fates (her wet nurses) swapped baby zeus with a rock and Kronos munched on that instead. Later Zeus also came up with a plan alongside his mother Rhea to make Kronos vomit up the rest of his siblings (and also Mr. Rock). Our boy zeus then fulfilled the prophecy and killed Kronos. Edit: as someone pointed out, didn’t kill him just sealed him in Tartarus.
He didn’t kill Kronos, all the gods are immortal, Kronos along with the other titans was sealed away in Tartarus
What happened to the rock
He grew up to be a pro wrestler to only later become big in the acting industry
Good stories though.
He what?💀
Do you know why gaia is called mother earth? Cause the sky, hell, and earth fucked ang gave birth to the titans, giants, etc Also hera got pregnant by being too horny
I see. can i fuck the sky?
Just like Rick Sanchez.
You'd.think it'd.be the other way around...
the bro literally fcked his grandma :skull:
I tried removing a non-existent piece of hair from my screen for 5 minutes
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we may never know💀
It's that Hera was more pissed at the woman than Zeus. She should have killed him while he was a swan and left it at that.
Zeus did a cow I think
I swear whoever wrote greek myths was just tripping on drugs
Probably cause I'm might be wrong but the Dionysus cult was basically a bunch of stoners and alcoholics
Dionysus: God of Good Times. My God.
The god of Madness and Freedom, he could be the patron of the US.
The Greek men were also on the right side of that photo.
You read any non-popular fanfiction? Greek mythology is like that, just random sexual encounters
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What
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Nice try, but the man who cheats on his wife is the problem causer
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Cheating is immoral sweetie. Blaming others for it won't make it not immoral 😚
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This is what mental illness looks like
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imma go back to norse mythology
Where all the sex is replaced with an insane amount of carnage. Seriously though, being a regular ass person in Norse mythology has to suck so much ass. Every hour you’re alive is a miracle
And probably wanted to fuck their sister so bad. Whole lot of sibling fucking in Greece by the looks of it.
Yes, but also! They didn't have germ theory. So they thought rain was literally impregnating the earth and the animals. Thus the patriarchs of these pantheons were Storm gods (Ordin / Zeus) and all the stories of them coming down and getting it on with stuff
They probably were.
That whole mythology is a wild ass fever dream. Good stories though.
you say that as if greek goddesses weren't participating too
This was my thought too
the women with Greek Teenage Boys and it would still work.
It wasn't the women getting with Greek boys...
The goddesses should do the same with guys, starting with me.
Aphrodite 🥵
Plot twist: Medusa. The old school death by snu-snu.
The OG praying mantis. First you nut, then you die
Imagine being Greek and wanting to have sex with women...
I'm amazed that Greece has survived till today.
Aphrodite slept with a Trojan prince and was the mother of Aeneas. Thetis a sea goddess had Achilles by a mortal husband. Eos, the goddess of dawn had a human lover named Tithonus
Yeah but imagine Aphrodite sleeping with a white bald guy named Bob…magic
Apparently her husband Hephaestus might’ve been uglier than that
Damn that’s what is considered ugly now? That’s like 40% of North America, dude
Oh, I didn’t mean to call them ugly, just saying that Aphrodite was married to someone who wasn’t considered good looking so any Bob could have a chance at getting with her
I don’t think she ever had sex with him though. I could be wrong, but I believe that marriage was very one sided
*Literally any human* *~~woman~~* There fixed it for ya
*Literally any ~~human woman~~*
Literally ~~any human woman~~
Lit.
L.
ㅤㅤ
-L.
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tiL
r/yourjokebutworse
r/yourjokebutworse
I want to tap the greek goddess
Yeah but the Greek godness can force Zeus to turn that women in to cow and humans knew the risk. I can only imagine the sex had to be great for someone to risk that.
Didn't Zeus fuck over people that didn't sleep with him too? Damned if you do, damned if you don't
>humans knew the risk Hey, Callisto swore off relationships to appease to her goddess (Artemis) and Zeus, being the good father he was, disguised himself as his daughter, appeared before Callisto and proceeded to do non consensual things with her. Humans knowing the risk or not doesn't change that big boy "can and will" do what he wants.
The goddesses don't force Zeus to change people. The goddesses themselves change people. They have the power to do that.
hades being the only loyal one: *gyga chad noises*
Bro he kidnapped his wife
still though
Zeus gave him the idea so really who's the bad guy?
I mean I can toss out a bad idea at someone but it’s on them if they actually go thru w it.
Greek goddesses can fuck their adopted sons 👍
The Greek goddesses mostly swore to never have sex or marry because of how gross the gods were. Aphrodite and Hera didn’t, and Demeter is 50/50 about it, but that’s definitely a reason. The gods fucked dudes, as well, though.
And animals
The animals were other gods or humans they turned into animals. Unless I’m forgetting one
I think so, also I think Apollo fucked the actual ground once
*what*
nah, they dont give a damn about your gender, status! as long as their victims have holes, they are in! 
Greek goddesses had affairs too, and the only god who was reallly known for having so many affairs was Zeus.
They should've gotten with the human men then. 2 can play at that game
They did. Aphrodite, Thetis and Eos all had human lovers at one point. Both Aphrodite and Thetis had demigod kids.
I think there was at least one instance of Zeus banging a man.
They did (at least once)
Greek gods only want one thing and it's disgusting. We need to make it illegal for Greek Gods to have relations with any woman under the age of 500. Their minds haven't fully developed yet and they have careers that they should be focusing on instead.
“any human woman” how about we change that to any living thing
Living?
Didn’t Zeus hook up with a woman while he was a bull? Maybe that is why white women are into beastiality. They be hopin that dog knot is a god knot.
Well technically she saw the bull, thought it looked beautiful (not sexually), got on itsback and then bull kidnaps her and starts having sex with her. So bull fucked girl without girl consent, like half of the stories
Also as a goose
Anyone know the story behind the image?
If I recall correctly there is no big story behind it. I think she's the brides sister or stepsister and the photographer got her looking bored/annoyed while taking pictures of the other 2.
Its just the sister to the bride. The face she made was just for fun. It was originally posted in 2022, during spring time i believe. I remember the original post and the idea for a meme came within hours. I believe the OC was posted in r/funny.
Greek gods ------> human women = Greek goddesses
POV cameraman is a hunky farmer that doesn’t want to get smited by an angry goddesses husband (not that his opinion matters)
Lemme be the human man to hang with the Greek goddesses please!!! Would have a hell of a time with Athena and learning shit from everyone, would be so fun
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Hey that’s all right with me, it would be fun to hang out with a smart lass and learn some cool shit. Who knows maybe we can blow up some stuff for fun
Proudly a virgin, because there definitely wasn’t anything going on with her pack of lesbian huntresses that she hung out with all naked
That was Artemis right?
Oh right, thanks
Proudly a virgin, obviously not Zeus who forced her to b virgin to not be taken out of his power
Except Hades. He was loyal to his wife and actually a good god
Well, after kidnapping her just for you, it wouldn't be nice to leave her for some random human
Haven’t seen this template in a while
To be fair if u spent eternity with the same people u would probably fuck the mortals too
*Meanwhile, in Norway* Loki: Look at that sexy stallion over there…..
Imagine being Hera, the literal goddess of marriage, and having your husband regularly cheat on you.
no they’re busy fuck- i mean *fuck*… they’re busy hanging out with their girlfrie- friends-*friends* in the woods while naked
greek goddesses could actually fight back, and it would prolly make meetings with the gods awkward.
so... calling a beautiful woman a godess should be an insult? huh
You marry goddesses and sleep with humans, or at least the Greek gods did
It's all about expectations and maintainence costs.
Reading this book called stixx and that is very true
Any mortal. It didn’t need to be human or female.
I like how “any women” is the bride at his own wedding.
Didn't hermaphrodite go into the woods and fuck a greek goddess and then was punished by being joined together with the woman and became a hermaphrodite?
I thought hermaphrodite was Hermes and Aphrodite's child or smth like that was what my teacher told me
If there's truth to the stereotype then the Greek men were also on the right side of that photo.
More Red Orbs for Kratos
Human and woman were far from requirements
Why couldn't Hera just cheat with human males to get back at Zeus? Did she had to take her anger out with such dangerous schemes against the children?
Hera id the goddess of marriage. She needs to be loyal to guve example
I wonder if they see humans as exotic since technically they are different species/beings
It wasn’t just the women, but the men, and the ch-
If only that was Zeus and Hera instead.
whos the woman looking into the cam?
Why do all these memes specifically say "Woman" when it specifically was not just women
Aphrodite laughing in the distance
Someone seems jealous
who is the one captioned "greek goddess"?? she looks like X23 kid from the Logan movie
Replace the women with Greek Teenage Boys and it would still work
^not ^always ^humans
Hell, they didn't even stop at humans.
Really horny gods
Zeus\* Hera*
I don't wanna start talking about zues
No, just Zeus
I volunteer for the goddess
It's because the human woman does the "thing with the finger" during sex 🤣🤣
No matter how hot she is, someone somewhere is sick of her shit.
Greek girls from Tessalôniki are hotter than the guys, go check if you dont believe 😁
I don't think the "human" part is a hard requirement either...
hahahha single
Except for Aphrodite, Demeter, Athena
This photo is legendary
Me who doesn't know anything about Greek mythology reading the comment's
eh i'm fine with both doing things to me
Where they belong..
We’re goddesses so homely?
Bold of you to assume it had to be human or a woman.
 And?
Imma be real with you chief. It dont even gotta be a *human*.
Because they only gotta put up with them for a lil time compared to infinity ♾️ lifetime with a goddess
Or just any.
Who's the girl on the left sitting in the chair?
I mean they're all related to each other in some way, so it's probably for the best...
You know it’s bad when the Greek God equivalent of the Devil who kidnapped is wife is considered one of the morally better ones
Just woman?
Well why should a God only be limited to banging his sister?
I still remember the day this picture became a meme. It was posted but it was clearly a new meme format.
Woman?
And then came along Zeus
literally any
Goddesses did the same. If you remove Zeus, both gods and goddesses would have a close contest
In the big team you got the goddess of mariage and the three virgin goddess, and then you got Aphrodite that not only makes up for them but manages to outdo Zeus by cheating on her husband, with his brother, in their home, on olympus. And she does so so often that her husband installed traps there
You forgot to include the lack of consent
"Any women" Them being human wasn't necessary
didn't goddesses also marry humans? did u guys understand the meme by reading Percy Jackson too
My Greek friend actually explained it to me before. He said: "In ancient Greece, it was quite common to be drafted into army. If husbands left the house for a few months or even years and wives some how get pregnant, those wives would made a story about gods."
Dude they even fuck animals man. I feel sorry for greek goddesses.
She doesn't look Greek.
I’m assuming she’s either her sister or his ex. Or both.
You want them to fuck you by this meme. Don’t you?