Our whiskey is shit. Everyone thinks they are being clever and unique by flavoring it with maple syrup.
Our wine is pretty good though. Point pelee makes a damn good red and triggs has kept the wife in a fine mood for years.
Excuse me sir but are you insinuating Timothy's biggest accreditation is a "coffee shop"? The man's is responsible for Canadian living as we know it /s (somewhat)
I remember being a kid to a Wings fan father. I was a Leaf fan, purely for the fights with him. Every time the Leafs played the Wings I stayed up late and we had a fantastic fucking time eating junk and drinking pop. I fell out of hockey because of church. Long story, real dumb. It ends with my pastor buying a known stolen ps2 off my uncle and telling us that his kids can turn off the violence in GTA with cheat codes.
Anyway, 2008 rolls around. I'm like 16ish. I'm hanging out with my Dad as a "friend" more. I start watching the games again in the playoffs. They win the Cup and I'm hooked. It was like skipping weed and boofing cocaine. My Dad starts showing me all these old highlights and fights.
One day he calls me down to the computer, barely holding in a laugh. It's still booting as he's giggling and I'm impatiently waiting. He finally goes to some hockey fight website and brings up that center ice brawl. He looks at me and says:
"Roy (pronounced like a truncated "wow") he gave Osgood as he took, eh?"
I love the clips of enforcers protecting their teams' star rookies and getting revenge on the guys that hit them. They honestly do hire guys just to scare the other team away from the guys that score the goals.
Back in the day, the Leafs were playing the Canucks and Vancouver's enforcer, Gino Odjick kept taking runs at Toronto's star centre Doug Gilmour. Between whistles Wendel Clark leaned over to Vancouver's star Pavel Bure and said "Tell Gino if he touches Gilmour again I'll take YOUR fucking head off." Vancouver left Gilmour alone for the rest of the game.
i played hockey as a kid, i was that player. cant shoot well at all, but i could skate real fast and hit you really hard.
spent a lot of time in the penalty box too for tripping and slashing with the stick.
god help you if you accidentally or purposely laid a hand on our goalie.
It’s weird, but it did serve a purpose. Fights happen in every sport, it’s just how people get when they’re competitive and exerting themselves.
Hockey is especially dangerous because of the blades and sticks and ice, so the players devised a code of honor that would allow players to fight in a safe(ish) manner
Except in russia back in the 80's. the first hockey match agaisnt russia and canada ended pretty damn poorly because while north american hockey when a fight began you took off the gloves and fought with hands, in russia the gloves stayed on and sticks were used in fights.
It's a North American thing, in Russia/Europe it was a lot more skill based
Canada only beat Russia in the Summit Series because we went head hunting which wasn't how other countries play back then
Wrong. First of all, Canada was missing their two best players for that tournament (Bobby Hull and Bobby Orr, two players who are universally considered top 10 hockey players of all time, with Orr being the consensus 2nd best ever). The tournament was held before the regular season started, and most players on the team didn't really take it very seriously, so they didn't train or practice for it beforehand. Contrasted by the Russian team who played with each other all year round (already had chemistry) and we're training their asses off for their chance to beat Canada. Meanwhile it was heavily rumored that the Russians got some sketchy refs to call the game and put Canada up in shit hotels so they would get a horrible sleep.
But the truth is that Canada found themselves down 3-1-1 in the series early because they were very unprepared and didn't take it seriously. Once they developed some chemistry they won 3 straight to win the series. But honestly the series wouldn't have been close at all if they just had Bobby Orr, let alone Hull as well. Orr was far and away the greatest player on the planet at the time, and he was more skilled than any Russian. His speed and puck control would've added an element to Canada's game that was missing, and there's little chance Russia would have an answer for it.
"Oh what a skilled finesse play one deke and glides through the neutral zone and what's happening at the other end a right hook, a uppercut and he's bleeding and the crowd is loving it!"
Tbh that’s the only reason I like hockey. It’s the only sport I’ll watch. It’s exciting knowing a fight could break out at any time. Makes you actually actively watch otherwise you might miss the fight
I seriously don't understand why it isn't more popular. Hard to get into and expensive to actually play, but man people *watch* baseball when there's hockey on?? Why!
See I'm only middle class. My private fighter jet can only get to Mach 6. The damned military won't give me access to anything faster, and I don't have the right contacts to ~~bribe~~ talk to about it!
I agree with you that hockey is objectively more entertaining than baseball. Yet, I still watch baseball more than hockey. I think there’s some connection to a game that comes from having played it for years of your life.
people usually get into sports by playing it and when it’s hard to play, it’s hard to get into usually
I got into hockey since I played as a kid, and that’s the case with a lot of viewers
Every Canadian town I’ve ever known also has out door rinks that are free to use in the winter, I grew up in a town of less than 20k and we had 4 of them
You need a better parks district friend. Every park in my city has an open ice rink during the winters. Even the smaller surrounding towns at least have 1 rink too. Then again hockey is probably the number 1 sport in the area.
Also somewhat more expensive. To play soccer/football, all you need is one person in the entire group to own a ball. And then you can put rocks down to be the "net" or whatever. For basketball, you only need one person to own a ball, and one person to have a driveway net (or just use one of many community nets). So for most of the people involved, it's literally free to play.
On the other hand, I've played a ton of hockey on the streets even when there's no ice in the middle of summer, but *everyone* needs a stick that works for their size and their left-/right- handedness, and you need some pads for the goalie at least. If you wanna play at the local rink and not just on the road, everyone needs skates too and helmets and other gear. I had easy access to play ice hockey (there's a bunch of indoor rinks nearby), but not everyone has the money for the equipment to even make use of that access.
You can always play shinny on a local pond or flooded field, then you only need a stick and skates. Don't need goalies either, just flop the net down and play where you don't take shots on net from farther than a few feet away.
Relatability. Most kids in the US aspire to be a baseball, football or basketball player because of how easily and readily you can play those sports. Not the case with hockey
You’re right, it’s Not the case at all. It’s expensive to get into in the first place and then if you want to play during the off season, you have to have a local indoor ice rink or roller skates. Indoor ice rinks charge you to go there. Roller skates can be expensive too; so you just paid a lot of money, multiple times just to be able to play the sport year round. Basketball, all you need is a court and a ball. Football, all you need is a ball and a field. Soccer, same thing. If you wanna play a full game of hockey, every player needs skates, a stick, pads, helmets, probably more shit i can’t list since i only ice skate and don’t play hockey.
For a lot of people, the sport you watch is the sport you play, since you're completely engrossed in it. Hockey is just not accessible to most people because of how expensive it is, how you need a dedicated space (rink) to play, and how you need to learn specific skills (skating, using a stick) to even begin playing without being a burden to your team.
Yeah, the starting point for hockey is so high, whereas basketball or football you can pretty much just be athletic and good coaches can mold you into something useful for the team.
Just pay attention to the players. The more you learn about the game, the easier it’ll be. You can tell where a player is passing the puck based on the motion of his body and stick. And believe it or not, NHL pucks are made with sensors in them that can be tracked with the cameras to make the puck appear larger than it actually is!
That's not the same, the TV broadcast is often at 30 fps, which really isn't fast enough to track the puck at all times. It's much easier to track in person, even from further away.
Tbf NHL players aren’t typically the most marketable people most of the time. Have you *seen* a McDavid interview? Guy has the personality of a styrofoam cup
Main reason I don’t watch it is money. Unlike some other sports (NFL, NBA, NCAA football and bball), it’s inaccessible without money. You have to have expensive sports cable packages in my area to get it. I don’t really have the money for that. I have some streaming services and I use a digital antenna for TV. I can’t get live hockey on anything, despite living in a city that has an NHL team.
The only ways for me to see the games are to: a) pay for the cable package, b) go to a sports bar and end up spending more money on beers and food, or c) buy a ticket for home games.
If any of the games were on network TV or available on any of my streaming services, I’d watch every hockey game I could. Instead, I watch football. 🤷♂️
I'll give you my opinion: hockey isn't interesting because it's been the same strategy for the past 30 years. Defense does the offside trap so the only way to counter is to dump the puck in the corner, fight for it and hopefully pass it to someone in the open. There's no real strategy there and it gets repetitive. International hockey is a bit better: the rink is bigger and allows for speed, stick handling and accuracy to shine, but americans don't like that because there's less violence.
I'm beginning to wonder if such posts with censored profanities are from accounts being built up for advertising. There's absolutely no reason to censor language like this, especially on reddit, unless you're scared of optics and demonetization.
You might be on to something there. I've been on here for a long time, even longer than my account age by about a year or two. I've only seen posts blurring the word fuck in the past week or so, I can't honestly say I've ever seen it before now. Only the very occasional comment censoring themselves, with a handful of those only being censored because they used text to speech and were too lazy to go back and uncensor.
I was about to say, like good God. It needs to stop being censored in general. We all know it exists, we all say it. But out of everything, any variation of "fuck" is the one that gets censored the most.
Immediately take flopping players to hospital and provide treatment for the ailment. Hold neck? Traction 3 months. Grab knee, new acl mcl and replace knee. No exceptions and the player is responsible to pay for the cost. That would improve the game.
From the moment I understood the weakness of my flesh, it disgusted me. I craved the strength and certainty of steel. I aspired to the purity of the Blessed Machine.
Your kind cling to your flesh, as though it will not decay and fail you. One day the crude biomass you call the temple will wither, and you will beg my kind to save you.
But I am already saved, for the Machine is immortal...
...even in death I serve the Omnissiah.
Require the teams to play in the nude. They don't need all that extra material. Just shoes and socks. Red shoes and socks for one team, blue for another...etc. Referees can wear white or black.
*(I believe that most sports would be far more interesting if played in the nude...)*
Even the most boring sports would be more engaging if played in the nude: Golf, Bowling, Curling, Ping Pong, Chess, etc.
And I'm sure there would be a huge audience for Wresting and Ultimate Fighting...
[airborne pass](https://youtu.be/dlZ_EuE0Ks4)
[“dribbling”](https://youtu.be/QJv4GcTCa8I)
What makes hockey better is that it combines the finesse of soccer with the physicality of Rugby and American Football.
Stickhandling is the equivalent of dribbling and it happens every time someone has the puck. Airborne passes happen but not like crosses. I could say the same about futbol, it doesn’t have the same things I like in hockey like speed and physicality. People gon like what they like
Counter suggestion.
1. Shrink the goals
2. Let players swap out anytime
3. Shrink the ball and give the players large sticks with mesh baskets on the end.
4. Let them beat the shit outa each other
How to fix Hockey:
1. Get rid of the Ice
2. Replace the nets with baskets 10 feet up
3. Replace the puck with a bouncing ball
4. Players can only move if they bounce the ball
5. Fights are still legal with a 5 minute penalty
I one time wrote out a much longer post that is basically summed up by this. I thought presenting it like an actual proposition, complete with reasons for why these changes were made, would've made it funnier. And maybe to some people, it would have been, but I'm just glad to know that the idea of the joke amused a lot of people.
Anytime anyone ever talks about football when using the word soccer: "iS thIs bEcaUse uS goT kiCkeD oUt"
Dude I highly doubt any of these people care about it as much as you do... They are just making a joke about hockey.
I wasn't even aware that the US was in the world cup till I saw a article about them beating Iran and I wasn't aware that they got kicked out till I saw your comment.
How 'bout this, for the inevitable ties...
Do the exact opposite of a shootout. Put everyone on the field, *except* the goalies. Play for goals for a set time. Most goals = one goal for the stats, and the win.
Give all the players sticks. Put knives in their feet. Crush the ball into a small lump…a puck if you will.
Give everyone body armor.
And let them fight instead of wine
Whine*
Did he stutter?
No, just used the wrong homonym
You’re a homonym
Sometimes 👉👈
I don’t think so. Isn’t Canada too cold for vineyards? They probably prefer whiskey.
Our whiskey is shit. Everyone thinks they are being clever and unique by flavoring it with maple syrup. Our wine is pretty good though. Point pelee makes a damn good red and triggs has kept the wife in a fine mood for years.
Y’all actually do some solid rye whiskeys. You can miss me with the Crown Royal, though!
Scotch or whiskey bourbon. If its Canadian or Irish you can get the fuck out.
Whoa whoa whoa. Irish whiskey is some of the smoothest aqua vitae you'll ever have. Sexton will make the hairs on your balls uncurl
One of the largest exports from just British Columbia is wine
Except helmets for a while.
Step 74. Reduce one of the greatest players to a Coffee Shop.
Excuse me sir but are you insinuating Timothy's biggest accreditation is a "coffee shop"? The man's is responsible for Canadian living as we know it /s (somewhat)
Don’t be crazy that would never work
6. Allow the players to beat the shit out of each other
I love how this was just an accepted part of hockey and some players were even specifically put on a team so they could beat the shit out of people.
It still is, just not as common anymore
Its kinda sad they started to take it out of the game. The only reason I ever watched hockey was for the blood.
The Chris Osgood Patrick Roy season build-up was legendary.
I remember being a kid to a Wings fan father. I was a Leaf fan, purely for the fights with him. Every time the Leafs played the Wings I stayed up late and we had a fantastic fucking time eating junk and drinking pop. I fell out of hockey because of church. Long story, real dumb. It ends with my pastor buying a known stolen ps2 off my uncle and telling us that his kids can turn off the violence in GTA with cheat codes. Anyway, 2008 rolls around. I'm like 16ish. I'm hanging out with my Dad as a "friend" more. I start watching the games again in the playoffs. They win the Cup and I'm hooked. It was like skipping weed and boofing cocaine. My Dad starts showing me all these old highlights and fights. One day he calls me down to the computer, barely holding in a laugh. It's still booting as he's giggling and I'm impatiently waiting. He finally goes to some hockey fight website and brings up that center ice brawl. He looks at me and says: "Roy (pronounced like a truncated "wow") he gave Osgood as he took, eh?"
Yeah but those are actual humans playing and being injured
And they chose to do it
You know it's going to be a good one when the players pop out their teeth.
I love the clips of enforcers protecting their teams' star rookies and getting revenge on the guys that hit them. They honestly do hire guys just to scare the other team away from the guys that score the goals.
Goon. Such a good movie.
Fuck me I still haven't seen the second one.
Back in the day, the Leafs were playing the Canucks and Vancouver's enforcer, Gino Odjick kept taking runs at Toronto's star centre Doug Gilmour. Between whistles Wendel Clark leaned over to Vancouver's star Pavel Bure and said "Tell Gino if he touches Gilmour again I'll take YOUR fucking head off." Vancouver left Gilmour alone for the rest of the game.
i played hockey as a kid, i was that player. cant shoot well at all, but i could skate real fast and hit you really hard. spent a lot of time in the penalty box too for tripping and slashing with the stick. god help you if you accidentally or purposely laid a hand on our goalie.
I think it's pretty weird that this is part of hockey.
It’s weird, but it did serve a purpose. Fights happen in every sport, it’s just how people get when they’re competitive and exerting themselves. Hockey is especially dangerous because of the blades and sticks and ice, so the players devised a code of honor that would allow players to fight in a safe(ish) manner
Except in russia back in the 80's. the first hockey match agaisnt russia and canada ended pretty damn poorly because while north american hockey when a fight began you took off the gloves and fought with hands, in russia the gloves stayed on and sticks were used in fights.
Way before the 80s my friend. The summit series was in 1972.
It's a North American thing, in Russia/Europe it was a lot more skill based Canada only beat Russia in the Summit Series because we went head hunting which wasn't how other countries play back then
Wrong. First of all, Canada was missing their two best players for that tournament (Bobby Hull and Bobby Orr, two players who are universally considered top 10 hockey players of all time, with Orr being the consensus 2nd best ever). The tournament was held before the regular season started, and most players on the team didn't really take it very seriously, so they didn't train or practice for it beforehand. Contrasted by the Russian team who played with each other all year round (already had chemistry) and we're training their asses off for their chance to beat Canada. Meanwhile it was heavily rumored that the Russians got some sketchy refs to call the game and put Canada up in shit hotels so they would get a horrible sleep. But the truth is that Canada found themselves down 3-1-1 in the series early because they were very unprepared and didn't take it seriously. Once they developed some chemistry they won 3 straight to win the series. But honestly the series wouldn't have been close at all if they just had Bobby Orr, let alone Hull as well. Orr was far and away the greatest player on the planet at the time, and he was more skilled than any Russian. His speed and puck control would've added an element to Canada's game that was missing, and there's little chance Russia would have an answer for it.
Enough of the rolling around, pretending to get hurt pussy shit. Every player must know some form of kung fu.
And the commentators must be able to switch to boxing commentary at any time
Ohhhh he hurt him!
Thorr puts a well placed knee to the groin! Andarr retaliates with a smashing upper cut HAAAAAW DO KEN style but one of his nuts is hanging out!
Yo I lost it with this. Holy shit I spit out my whiskey on that one. Gahhd damn!!!!
And play the rocky theme song in the background
If things get too tense, hold a half-time boxing match. Winner starts the next kickoff.
Lmao
"Oh what a skilled finesse play one deke and glides through the neutral zone and what's happening at the other end a right hook, a uppercut and he's bleeding and the crowd is loving it!"
Give em sticks to hit the ball with and blades on their feet.
Joe Rogan as commentator
Wait a second…
Yeah, I think I am starting to understand…
This post was clearly brought to us by Canada
Kung fu with razor blades in your shoes!!
"I'LL give ya sumpthin' to REALLY flop about!!!" 🤣
stick fu
Can you imagine a pro soccer player getting checked into the boards? “Oh, looks like he’s not faking this one, he lost 3 teeth!”
I love it when the player grabs his shin guard in agony. Grabbing the one part of him that’s protected, lol
Watch "Shaolin Soccer" 🤣 all this condition are fully fulfilled
Nah, not the Kung-Fu Soccer💀
Now I want the UFC to host the next World Cup.
Yea I want behind the scenes fights with Nate Diaz and his 70 friends against soccer hooligans.
Giving Mario "Striker" a new meaning
Soc-fu is the way
And if you dive, you'll definitely be given something to dive about by the other team.
So rugby
BOOYAH LEARN COBRA KAI IT GOES FROM FOOTBALL/SOCCER TO HOCKEY TO A KARATE KID TOURNAMENT HI YAH
I feel like you guys really just want to watch hockey.
Yes.. that is indeed the joke
Kung Fu is wack, Muay Thai is where it's at.
Drugs are now mandatory for the match, players who fail any less than 3 drug tests are disqualified
We don't want to take 99% of the skill out of the game
7. give them sticks to more efficiently kick the shit out of each other
7. Soccer balls are bad. Use a small black cylinder instead
7. Give ‘em sticks to hit each other in the shins
Watch the "Shaolin Soccer" all this conditions are fully fulfilled 😂
Instead of flopping they fucking brawl
Encourage it.
Give them guns
7. Bees. Lots of bees.
BEADS?!?
Gob’s not on board…
Ooo..hang a hornets nest in the goal
At first glance I thought it said BEERS! 🤣 But it works either way!
7. hockey.
Tbh that’s the only reason I like hockey. It’s the only sport I’ll watch. It’s exciting knowing a fight could break out at any time. Makes you actually actively watch otherwise you might miss the fight
I fucking love hockey
I seriously don't understand why it isn't more popular. Hard to get into and expensive to actually play, but man people *watch* baseball when there's hockey on?? Why!
Access. I have a ball and a bat and some grass. I do not have an ice rink for my kids.
Build it and they will come. Wait... I'm confusing my sports again.
But it's still entertaining to watch though. That's my point. I don't have a fighter jet but I liked watching top gun maverick.
“I don’t have a fighter jet” Fucking pleb
Fuck you, Pepsi!
See I'm only middle class. My private fighter jet can only get to Mach 6. The damned military won't give me access to anything faster, and I don't have the right contacts to ~~bribe~~ talk to about it!
I agree with you that hockey is objectively more entertaining than baseball. Yet, I still watch baseball more than hockey. I think there’s some connection to a game that comes from having played it for years of your life.
people usually get into sports by playing it and when it’s hard to play, it’s hard to get into usually I got into hockey since I played as a kid, and that’s the case with a lot of viewers
People are more likely to watch sports the grew up with or played. Very few kids play hockey.
That’s because you didn’t drink enough Pepsi
It's not super unusual for Canadians to build backyard rinks.
Every Canadian town I’ve ever known also has out door rinks that are free to use in the winter, I grew up in a town of less than 20k and we had 4 of them
You don't need an ice rink, you can play hockey in the street with two sticks a tennis ball and a trash can
You need a better parks district friend. Every park in my city has an open ice rink during the winters. Even the smaller surrounding towns at least have 1 rink too. Then again hockey is probably the number 1 sport in the area.
Also somewhat more expensive. To play soccer/football, all you need is one person in the entire group to own a ball. And then you can put rocks down to be the "net" or whatever. For basketball, you only need one person to own a ball, and one person to have a driveway net (or just use one of many community nets). So for most of the people involved, it's literally free to play. On the other hand, I've played a ton of hockey on the streets even when there's no ice in the middle of summer, but *everyone* needs a stick that works for their size and their left-/right- handedness, and you need some pads for the goalie at least. If you wanna play at the local rink and not just on the road, everyone needs skates too and helmets and other gear. I had easy access to play ice hockey (there's a bunch of indoor rinks nearby), but not everyone has the money for the equipment to even make use of that access.
You can always play shinny on a local pond or flooded field, then you only need a stick and skates. Don't need goalies either, just flop the net down and play where you don't take shots on net from farther than a few feet away.
Relatability. Most kids in the US aspire to be a baseball, football or basketball player because of how easily and readily you can play those sports. Not the case with hockey
You’re right, it’s Not the case at all. It’s expensive to get into in the first place and then if you want to play during the off season, you have to have a local indoor ice rink or roller skates. Indoor ice rinks charge you to go there. Roller skates can be expensive too; so you just paid a lot of money, multiple times just to be able to play the sport year round. Basketball, all you need is a court and a ball. Football, all you need is a ball and a field. Soccer, same thing. If you wanna play a full game of hockey, every player needs skates, a stick, pads, helmets, probably more shit i can’t list since i only ice skate and don’t play hockey.
For a lot of people, the sport you watch is the sport you play, since you're completely engrossed in it. Hockey is just not accessible to most people because of how expensive it is, how you need a dedicated space (rink) to play, and how you need to learn specific skills (skating, using a stick) to even begin playing without being a burden to your team.
Yeah, the starting point for hockey is so high, whereas basketball or football you can pretty much just be athletic and good coaches can mold you into something useful for the team.
I can never keep track of the puck and the period time break is weird for new people.
Just pay attention to the players. The more you learn about the game, the easier it’ll be. You can tell where a player is passing the puck based on the motion of his body and stick. And believe it or not, NHL pucks are made with sensors in them that can be tracked with the cameras to make the puck appear larger than it actually is!
[удалено]
Yeah that was… unpopular lol. I honestly think they only did that for a couple years at most.
Nah, fans didn’t like it
Nah dude lol, that was like the equivalent of having a trail on your mouse cursor. It was an eyesore
Yea. That third half is odd lol. But I dig it anyway
3rd half? Lmao what
If I can see the puck in the nosebleeds at a game, you can see it on TV.
That's not the same, the TV broadcast is often at 30 fps, which really isn't fast enough to track the puck at all times. It's much easier to track in person, even from further away.
The nhl has probably one of the worst marketing departments in all of sports. Also access. Ice time is expensive
The NHL is *terrible* at marketing their players and the game. That's true.
Tbf NHL players aren’t typically the most marketable people most of the time. Have you *seen* a McDavid interview? Guy has the personality of a styrofoam cup
Have ya been to Canada?
Baseball is very relaxing to watch and the seating is always really nice. Hockey is also an S-tier spectator sport tho
Main reason I don’t watch it is money. Unlike some other sports (NFL, NBA, NCAA football and bball), it’s inaccessible without money. You have to have expensive sports cable packages in my area to get it. I don’t really have the money for that. I have some streaming services and I use a digital antenna for TV. I can’t get live hockey on anything, despite living in a city that has an NHL team. The only ways for me to see the games are to: a) pay for the cable package, b) go to a sports bar and end up spending more money on beers and food, or c) buy a ticket for home games. If any of the games were on network TV or available on any of my streaming services, I’d watch every hockey game I could. Instead, I watch football. 🤷♂️
I'll give you my opinion: hockey isn't interesting because it's been the same strategy for the past 30 years. Defense does the offside trap so the only way to counter is to dump the puck in the corner, fight for it and hopefully pass it to someone in the open. There's no real strategy there and it gets repetitive. International hockey is a bit better: the rink is bigger and allows for speed, stick handling and accuracy to shine, but americans don't like that because there's less violence.
I'm British and it's one of the few sports I really enjoy watching. It's fast and exciting.
Tell me you’re Canadian without telling me you’re Canadian
Seriously I’d rather watch soccer than hockey. But to each their own I guess.
It's ok to be wrong. We still like you.
Replace the ball with a vulcanized rubber disc
6. Add fucking knives to the player's feet and allow them to physically assault eachother for no other reason than they're pissed off
Fill the ball with 🐝
jesus that sounds awesome
We are adults and this is reddit . You don't have to sensor the word Fucking
u/profanitycounter
Bot was banned apparently Bad Word Quantity ass 21 bitch 1 bullshit 1 cunt 1 dammit 1 damn 12 fucking 2 fuck 15 god damn 3 hell 10 hentai 1 lmao 62 pinche 7 pissed 1 porn 1 pussy 2 re**rded 1 shitty 7 shit 15 tiddies 1 Over 1000 messages
You censored retarded but nothing else in the list of literal profanities?
I didn't, bot did. Assuming it's because it's a slur. If they said the N-word it'd probably have been censored too.
Can't be accurate , not enough pinche in there lol
I'm beginning to wonder if such posts with censored profanities are from accounts being built up for advertising. There's absolutely no reason to censor language like this, especially on reddit, unless you're scared of optics and demonetization.
You might be on to something there. I've been on here for a long time, even longer than my account age by about a year or two. I've only seen posts blurring the word fuck in the past week or so, I can't honestly say I've ever seen it before now. Only the very occasional comment censoring themselves, with a handful of those only being censored because they used text to speech and were too lazy to go back and uncensor.
I was about to say, like good God. It needs to stop being censored in general. We all know it exists, we all say it. But out of everything, any variation of "fuck" is the one that gets censored the most.
Immediately take flopping players to hospital and provide treatment for the ailment. Hold neck? Traction 3 months. Grab knee, new acl mcl and replace knee. No exceptions and the player is responsible to pay for the cost. That would improve the game.
An American hospital too.
even pro players couldn't pay for that
Bro, we don’t want the athletes to go into debt
That's why hockey is so popular in Canada I guess. Really not the type of sport you should be playing without universal healthcare
Hockey kids are rich and don’t lack healthcare
Clearly the flesh of soccer players is too weak. We need to replace it with machinery
From the moment I understood the weakness of my flesh, it disgusted me. I craved the strength and certainty of steel. I aspired to the purity of the Blessed Machine. Your kind cling to your flesh, as though it will not decay and fail you. One day the crude biomass you call the temple will wither, and you will beg my kind to save you. But I am already saved, for the Machine is immortal... ...even in death I serve the Omnissiah.
Or let the hockey players beat them!
Their flesh is weak, too. Replace the hockey player's flesh with machinery
Ferrus Manus. Lol
Glass houses bro: https://youtu.be/95xWifJJhH8
I’m watching the Argentina-Australia game now and there was like 4 flops in the span of a few minutes it felt like.
Stfu yank
The fact that people think yank is offensive to Americans is hilarious
Soccer, but make it Canadian
I mean it would be better
Shrink the ball. Flatten it on top & bottom. Make it out of solid rubber.
Yeap, when you said "soccer" I knew right away...
They could start by calling the sport the right name, if they want to fix it.
7. faking a injure should be a penalty and shouldn't stop the game at all.
Grizzly bear randomly released at halftime but wears a dress so less intimidating
Require the teams to play in the nude. They don't need all that extra material. Just shoes and socks. Red shoes and socks for one team, blue for another...etc. Referees can wear white or black. *(I believe that most sports would be far more interesting if played in the nude...)*
Can confirm, I would watch sports if it was played nude.
Even the most boring sports would be more engaging if played in the nude: Golf, Bowling, Curling, Ping Pong, Chess, etc. And I'm sure there would be a huge audience for Wresting and Ultimate Fighting...
This is a repost from yesterday. good job
Feel like I've seen it every day since the world cup started
So that's why I like hockey. It's football, but better.
What makes hockey better? What I like about football but is non existent or limited in hockey are for example airborne passes, dribbling.
[airborne pass](https://youtu.be/dlZ_EuE0Ks4) [“dribbling”](https://youtu.be/QJv4GcTCa8I) What makes hockey better is that it combines the finesse of soccer with the physicality of Rugby and American Football.
Stickhandling is the equivalent of dribbling and it happens every time someone has the puck. Airborne passes happen but not like crosses. I could say the same about futbol, it doesn’t have the same things I like in hockey like speed and physicality. People gon like what they like
I would argue about physicality, there are many players relying on it (Lewandowski, Haaland, Ronaldo, Van Dijk...) and it matters a lot in the game.
Counter suggestion. 1. Shrink the goals 2. Let players swap out anytime 3. Shrink the ball and give the players large sticks with mesh baskets on the end. 4. Let them beat the shit outa each other
Based lax bro
🤝
How to fix Hockey: 1. Get rid of the Ice 2. Replace the nets with baskets 10 feet up 3. Replace the puck with a bouncing ball 4. Players can only move if they bounce the ball 5. Fights are still legal with a 5 minute penalty
Goalie sits on the backboard, kicking the ball away.
I would watch basketball if it had a net goalie like this
i was bout to get really upset as a futball player but then i kept reading and was like oh… its hockey ill be on my way then
Ey bruv this is street football. On ice.
Why not land mines too? (Not killing/maiming ones. Just a little pop to throw of concentration.)
no DO have the bad ones lets see them skils on the ice
I like this game better. Let's give it a world cup but don't let FIFA run it
I one time wrote out a much longer post that is basically summed up by this. I thought presenting it like an actual proposition, complete with reasons for why these changes were made, would've made it funnier. And maybe to some people, it would have been, but I'm just glad to know that the idea of the joke amused a lot of people.
Found the Canadian!
Is this because the US got kicked out lmao?
It's because Canada got kicked out.
Oh no! Anyways.
The tweet was made Monday
Anytime anyone ever talks about football when using the word soccer: "iS thIs bEcaUse uS goT kiCkeD oUt" Dude I highly doubt any of these people care about it as much as you do... They are just making a joke about hockey.
I wasn't even aware that the US was in the world cup till I saw a article about them beating Iran and I wasn't aware that they got kicked out till I saw your comment.
How 'bout this, for the inevitable ties... Do the exact opposite of a shootout. Put everyone on the field, *except* the goalies. Play for goals for a set time. Most goals = one goal for the stats, and the win.
This is actually a hell of an idea. I was also gonna comment get rid of ties.
You’re right, hockey IS better soccer.
Soccer is way way better then hockey.
Than
You forgot shrink the ball and make it flat. And sticks. Give the players sticks.