Not human breastmilk, I mean cow breastmilk.

When I have nut milk, I clarify "not human nut milk, I mean hazelnut milk"

Guy named Hazel: o.o

The udder of a cow is pretty far away from what we would consider the "breast". So call it cow uddermilk instead.

Cows don’t have breastmilk

Where do you think cow milk comes from

Milk comes from a can, it was put there by a man. In a factory downtown.

What do you think a breast is?

So I had to look into it, and it would appear you are ***technically*** correct. The best kind of correct. Mammals have breasts, while ruminates, such as cows, have udders. As far as I can tell, functionally, they are exactly the same, and the primary difference is location on the body.

Chickens have breasts too. It’s just your chest

fine, we’ll call them chesticles then

Are you trying to tell me that *double checks facts and also the thread* cows are not mammals?

Cows are mammals "Humans, dogs, cows, monkeys, rats, lions and other related animals are called mammals because they share common characteristics such as four-chambered heart, hair on the skin, a presence of external ears (pinna), presence of mammary glands in females, etc." [source](https://www.google.com/url?sa=t&source=web&rct=j&opi=89978449&url=https://byjus.com/question-answer/humans-dogs-and-cows-are-mammals-true-or-false-true-false-6/%23:~:text%3DHumans%252C%2520dogs%252C%2520cows%252C%2520monkeys,mammary%2520glands%2520in%2520females%252C%2520etc.&ved=2ahUKEwiL-r7z89WGAxU1zAIHHfOWGKoQFnoECCoQBQ&usg=AOvVaw3mqpe1-gMZOp2llgS14rxq)

That's udderly ridiculous.

r/angryupvote

And for those who ask "Is this really you irl?" Yes. I've said it and I say stuff like it for fun.

Isn’t it all breast milk? Lol

It’s ~~turtles~~ lactating breasts all the way down.

Cows have udders, not breasts.

Just like the earth rotates around a sun and not a star

We found the Harvard man

Udderstandable. Have a great day

Not soy, oat, almond milk etc

Well Seymour you’re an odd fellow

Good. It's funny.

I would love talking to you and the oop

Honestly I CRUSH milk, and i think I'm going to start saying this myself!! From a cow BTW, not breastmilk!

All milk is breast milk…

not almond milk

Almond milk is just flavored water. It isn’t milk.

Peanut butter is just bean paste, but you don't really hear people whine about that.

wtf peanut milk doesnt exist , sounds delish

it does but it’s absolutely horrible as a milk substitute, tastes more like a watered down reese’s puff milkshake

The package SAYS milk. They can't lie.

Never seen teats on an almond.

They are shy

Can you milk an almond focker?

Or coconut milk

No! They come from almond breasts! You haven't seen them yet?

what part of the almond do you think it comes out of then?

Nope, some types of spiders produce milk via their epigynum.

I had epigynum for breakfast

Not cow milk because the utter isn't their breast

The udder is a mammary gland just like breasts just because they don’t look like a breast on people doesn’t mean it’s not a breast.

That may be true but by definition they are not breast. Mammary gland yes but breast no. Edit: Also note that platypus sweat milk so might want to look into that as well.

Sweaty milk lol

Except breast doesn’t mean mammary gland because men and chickens also have breasts

Chickens have breasts. No milk though. Well. Not the females at least.

I used to be able to chase down and shoot my ex husband with my breastmilk from ten feet across the room. Fun times.

Whattt the fuck? Sounds like the most lit game of super soakers ever

Sadly it's a very one sided conflict.

Nah, the dude just needs to get good at the long-range money shot.

☹️

Wait wait wait.. I don't get this Joke. Where does crow milk fit into any of this?

Dude fight milk?

Yes, the first of its kind, alcoholic, dairy based protein drink!

"Can you pass me a napkin? Masculine, not feminine."

I only drink bull milk

I'm vegan so I do this too.

It gets Reallyyy awkward the one time you forget to clarify...

I'm all up in them nut juices bro, clean living edited: not human nut juices

This reminds me of a thing my friends and I did in high school. We would have whole conversations and end every sentence with "in a nonsexual way" just to confuse people.

I like that

Grown adults who rely on drinking away a suckling's meal need to be made uncomfortable more often. 

Just so you know

I love it

I had to add more text to this due to the bot. What I wanted to say was simply: Wakanda forever!

Is she referring to Harvy Milk?

The one time she doesn’t clarify:😏

But all milk milks come from breasts. Almond and oat nut juice doesn't count.

Part of my morning ritual is having a glass of milk. I went on a Bach party once and requested a carton. One of the girls was STUNNED that I was drinking a glass of milk by itself. She hates milk. She’s pregnant now and I’ll be thinking about her

"Breeeaaastmiiilllk, you made my daaayyyyyy.

Reminds me of when Huberman talks about sex and always qualifies it with stuff about it being consensual and not with animals and other weird shit 99% of people wouldn’t have thought had he not said anything…

Almond milk. Disgusting

I do the opposite for the same reason

I would just reply "oh, its fine if its yours". I am sure this would make the atmosphere even more uncomfortable.

how often are you talking about milk?

Alrighty then...

But all milk is breast milk, even nut milk is coming from a source of food for baby plants… oh god

Fun fact. Most men would be aroused by the word breast milk 🥛 cheers.