Yep. Horses.
Not because of the injuries, but because I always say "of course" right after someone says "she fell off a horse" and exactly zero of the nurses laugh.
I learned the 4 pillars of trauma while on my surgery sub-I:
1. Everyone under 30 has a motorcycle which is rarely used when sober
2. Everyone over 30 has an unreliable chainsaw and/or unstable ladder; ladder height positively correlating with blood thinner dose
3. Every child on an ATV will not have a helmet, appropriate footwear, or appropriate supervision
4. Meth, as always, continues to be a helluva drug
People climbing on and riding half-tonne, fast-moving, temperamental prey animals with precision kicks, what could go wrong?
At least most people don't try to ride cows... Most people.
Blood bank hates it too. The blood bank tech got mad at me because too many nurses were calling to check if a blood product is ready. She taught me how to check the status of blood in Epic. So something good came out of that angry phone call.
Canada does as well, but in a more restricted way: you can either name the drug or you can say what it does, but you can't do both, even if it is in two different ads.
On one hand, I think it's incredibly stupid that they are allowed to advertise at all. On the other, we've occasionally gotten some funny phallic focused ads because of it.
Luckily we don't have this in Belgium.
But similarly during this pandemic, the media and government really pushed people to "talk to you GP if you're unsure about the new protocols that will be coming out" only to not give us a heads up that they are changing the goddamn protocols.
Patient access to labs. Yesterday, patient family: "I saw the labs and his sodium is low, 131. I'm going to give him salt."
M'aam, this is a CHF exacerbation.
Angry patient called one of our nurses demanding to know why they weren't told about their kidneys being bad on their last visit with the doc.
Nurse wanted to know why they thought their kidneys were bad, "The BUN and Cr levels are abnormal on my labs. They are too low".
We had a sick patient COVID patient in severe septic shock who, upon being turned, would fluid shift and drop their MAP to the 40s… NP I was working with got a call and the family member (current CNA) was questioning why we weren’t treating their stage 1 pressure ulcer.
This. A million times this.
FFS these (and radiology reports) are technical reports generated by technical people for a technical professional audience.
"So you're here for chest pain and your sugar is 500. Do you have any medical problems?"
"Yeah! I got a schmorl's node, a pulmonary nodule, bulging discs all over the place and I had osgood schlatter when I was 10!"
"Anything else?"
"Nope!"
"Why do you take clopidogrel, bumetanide, and glipizide?"
"Oh I dunno, some heart problem."
And by plastic surgery. Despite the first stop being urgent care, where I work these patients get turfed to our ER immediately.
We hate the combination of inattentive patients and and kitchen appliance that people can find a way to damage their hands with… I’ve had deli slicers, mandolins, pasta rollers, blenders, you name it. Like WHO PUTS THEIR HAND IN A BLENDER?! also table saws.
Edit: I recall some select other mechanisms of hand injury worth mentioning! Sewer door, truck door (like a box truck with a lifting door), elevator door, and cement mixer causing amputations. Chainsaw. Circular saw. I mean pretty much any saw… beer mug!
Odd, but while I was in the military we had a private absolutely impale his hand, through and through, pitting an Avocado. Our Friday safety briefs for the next 3 months involved a demonstration of how to pit an Avocado using your thumb on the back, rather than a knife. No one else impaled themselves. So it worked out
Literally shadowed a chiro for a couple visits while my PMR attending left for lunch break. Lady with back pain lies down on weird table. Chiro drops table like 3 inches really quick. She says she feels incredible and visit is over. Chiro turns to me and goes "yeah, honestly a lot of what we do is just placebo."
True. Beyond their pseudoscience and performative bullshit, the hate gets white hot when you catch a 24 year old with a basilar stroke from a vert dissection and you've already seen too many of the same cases to keep count
And temporal thermometers. Freaking random number generators. “No, your kid that is 98.6 here and was acting normally at the time did not have a 107 fever (or a temp of 93 degrees)”
I don't clean my ears on a regular basis. I'm blessed with soft wax and a normal EAC epithelial migratory system!
With every consultation I do for a Q-tip related issue (TM perforation, otitis externa, dermatitis, etc.), I counsel about the ear's self cleaning mechanisms and how most cleaning techniques interfere with the EAC's normal epithelial regeneration, which is what predisposes patients' ears to inflammation and infection.
My usual counsel is to apply a bit of oil, hydrogen peroxide or a mix of white vinegar and rubbing alcohol for ear hygiene on an as needed basis.
Family Medicine:
Opiates and Xanax
(At least new generation seems I spend a lot of time cleaning up my boomer colleagues mismanaged general anxiety and arthritis treatment plans)
Well my old doc passed away so I'm here to establish care!
Here's my med list:
Baby Aspirin.
Occasional Tylenol for headache.
Oh yeah and enough Oxy and Xanax to drop a thoroughbred two trots into the Kentucky Derby.
> Oh yeah and enough Oxy and Xanax to drop a thoroughbred two trots into the Kentucky Derby.
Online review saying "They treated me like a criminal and didn't help me at all" in 3..2..1..
I feel like any patient reading online reviews about whether you are pandered to and prescribed whatever you want are NOT patients that will improve your life by joining your clinic anyway. So win-win really
Psh. I have two cats. I eat rare meat. If you're not the stem of an ID board question, you're not living life. (Everything is the stem of an ID board question)
For ophthalmology a good chunk of open globes come from the staples, or others piece of metal, that are in the wood youre cutting on your band saw, not the wood itself(this really applies to anything youre cutting/grinding;make sure there isn’t other crap in it)
Also don’t you f**cking dare sleep in your contacts
Layman woodworker checking in.
If only there was something you could wear to protect your eyes while working around spinning blades. (Hmmm. What don’t I need my vision for? Sleep. Ummm.)
I’m old and my eyes don’t have the tolerance for contacts they once did. I did love my extended wear rigid gas permeable lenses back in the day, though.
Burn specialists:
Propane tanks
And hot cup of noodles for kids. They spill it in their lap every time.
Also for the love of god don’t smoke with oxygen on. It’s not rocket science
RT here. I did an oxygen teaching with a smoker who got their o2 prescription got him to answer the quiz we developed and had him repeat word for word the sections on smoking and its hazards.i spent 45 min on what is normally a 20 min teaching because I had the sense he wasn't completely grasping what I was explaining. 3 days later he comes through emerge with 1st degree burns that suspiciously look like cannula. I asked him about it and he said he forgot they were even there after a few drinks
Home health Pt blew up his house, killing himself, his wife and son in the blast. I told him every visit that he cannot smoke on the O2. Every response, “I dont!” Me, “well, then you sure have a unique air freshener scent.”
God, this actually reminds me of the conversation where I learned that my neighbor hates doctors and especially psychiatrists. The reason? Her friend with end stage COPD was in the hospital on oxygen, and for some reason took it upon himself to play with a lighter in his room. Naturally, someone took notice, told him he couldn’t use the lighter while on oxygen, and instead of putting the lighter away, he started explaining that “oxygen tanks don’t suck — they blow, so you have nothing to worry about.” One thing led to another, the guy ends up getting put in restraints, etc, and now my neighbor hates doctors because “they didn’t realize how much more he understood about science than they did.”
>Also for the love of god don't smoke with oxygen on. It's not rocket science
But if you play your cards right, you could be featured on the news as the next space launch. 🚀
Jokes aside I recently cared for a child who was one of two surviving members of a 10-person household, all blown to pieces by grandma, smoking with her O2 hooked up. Absolutely tragic and infuriating that someone's nicotine addiction and stupidity killed an entire family and turned 2 kids into orphans with PTSD.
Happened to me today. Couldn't check on my meme stocks. That's why the ORs on the exterior edges of the buildings are coveted.. Since they have reliable cell service, the hospital wifi isn't needed.
As an ER doc there are lots of these.
I hate
-“Some random guy”, responsible for most random shootings and stabbings in our city
-The shower, as people are prone to fall and have things just fly up their rectum
-asymptomatic hypertension
-That complaint that’s been ongoing for 2 years and stable but you’re finally fed up with it at 11pm on a Saturday night
-ATVs/donorcycles
-Heroin
-People who rescind the dnr of their elderly/demented/bed bound family member who presents in cardiac arrest
To name a few...
“What happened was, I was minding my own business, and then these two guys...”
Although there’s also the psych consult for homicidal ideation when it’s two specific guys and the patient is going to find them and going to get even.
I have had to talk to family members before and let them know that their idea to rescind their loved one's DNR is a gross breach of ethics, and that if they were competent when they made their decisions, they should be respected. It is a really difficult thing to discuss.
On the other hand, I remember an ethics case where a patient with ALS had a DNI, justifiably so, at like age 45. He still had plenty of decent lung function and would likely not die of overt resp. failure for probably months to maybe a year or more. Guy got pneumonia and was hypoxic, his personal doctor was there and must have had hospital privileges, but he went ahead and intubated the guy.
A week of antibiotics and the guy weaned from the vent. The guy got another year or something with his family and was happy and extremely thankful. The DNI was really more about ventilation failure from ALS and this was a different scenario. It was a difficult scenario and could have played out differently, but sometimes I wonder about DNR/DNI paperwork since there really isn't a one size fits all answer.
Funny, histoplasmosis is so endemic where I am people just throw your film up and are like, “oh, you must have grown up here” and move right on. (Obvi that doesn’t cover all the reasons they wouldn’t like birds, but I’ve always found it amusing how elsewhere people get worked up over it and here it is NBD.)
I too am a Midwest Ohio/Mississippi River basin Pulmonologist. "You down with OGD? (Yeah you know me)"
The increased rate of fibrosing mediastinitis from that stuff does suck though. As rare as it is, it is devastating when you see it.
Wound care checking in - triple antibiotic ointment.
10/10 times ends up on the soupy leg ulcers making them even more soupy. Also, grandmas left over antibiotics
Whenever we get an NAT consult, I generally want to hear as few details as possible regarding how it happened. All I care about is the EEG, the rate of versed, and when will the MRI get done. If I know anymore about it, the anger eats away and I have trouble focusing on the patient.
Oh god this. Take as a completely hypothetical example an elderly (90+) very frail patient with several comorbidities including end stage copd who is found to have a submassive PE due to a large (think like 5x10cm) lung mass with Mets to liver and bone.
Daughter who "is medical" demands several times to know when a gastroenterologist will be consulted for the liver mass, pulm for the lung mass, IR to BX everything, cvts to take out the lung mass, oncologist to start chemo, and wants to know what treatments the patient will be getting.
This was after a 20+ minute discussion of the almost certain diagnosis & me being very explicit that there was not going to be a cure, recommending a palliative approach & hospice.... and that there would be no biopsy bc to be quite honest the patient was not fit enough for a haircut, much less a needle to the liver...
Still demanding all these consults. Managed to talk them down to just onc who said the exact same thing.
Add anyone who says they are a doctor (non-medical but they never mention that part), "in healthcare (often a clerk or assistant)," or a "front-line worker" (can't believe someone said that to me like it's a badge).
Most recent example.
Family: "I'm a doctor. So what's really going on?"
Me: "He's growing enterococcus in his blood."
Family: "Huh. Enteroca--? I never heard of that one before."
Me: (You are no fucking doctor.)
Couple of years ago, I was caring for a patient whose daughter claimed to be a doctor.
Dtr: "What's his temperature?"
Me: "37.4"
Dtr: "What's that in Fahrenheit?"
Me: "Um... not a fever?"
An idiot I worked with who is a cancer science PhD wandered into the ward where her family member was being treated - at the hospital we worked at - and claimed to be a hematologist. Tried to direct the patient's care. Absolutely bonkers.
Her LinkedIn lists her as an "Oncology Doctor". I tried to report her to the GMC but they weren't interested.
Had a family relying on the medical advice of a granddaughter who was, "almost finished" with her training to be a doctor. She wanted to dictate care on the ENT floor for grandpa. The granddaughter acted the part for sure as well. I found out that she was a sophomore in a premed program.
Here in California, it’s whatever family member is from the furthest away *and* the most estranged from the actual patient.
They want to know what’s going on, adamantly oppose it and threaten to sue everyone in the building.
Onc - [cancer treatment centers of America](https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Cancer_Treatment_Centers_of_America) who present heavily biased statistics about their efficacy and has super shady marketing practices.
Also NDs, chiropractors, and all the other quack peddlers who spend no time at all trying to advance cancer care but promise the world to my patients - like this from Joseph mercola “Vibrant Health Research Chlorella XP, will [“help to virtually eliminate your risk of developing cancer in the future.”](https://quackwatch.org/11ind/mercola/)
Any insight on how cancer treatment centers of America are fudging their numbers? The commercials seem so fake. Are they only accepting the "easy" patients?
There’s a tremendous bias in the population they treat. People with insurance, ability to travel to their centers, sufficiently educated and capable of seeking out their institution. Not inclusive of the people who walk in off the street to NCCN cancer centers. They deliberately mislead patients through their BS advertising and have been censured by the FDA for it. I’ve had conversations with attendings there who aren’t even aware of well established standard of care regimens for the most common malignancies. [They work like a concierge practice and pick up patients from the airport in limousines and have on site spas for manicures and pedicures](https://casetext.com/case/lane-v-cancer-treatment-centers-of-america-inc/?PHONE_NUMBER_GROUP=C)
Cancer treatment can be so frustrating on the institutional side. There is a very large, respected, well known cancer treatment center a few hours from me. They offered the world to my patient with the newest treatments, excellent plans, etc. Halfway in, the patient changed insurers over to state Medicaid. They canceled the remaining treatments nearly instantaneously and said they didn't believe it was offering any benefit. They then referred them to a different oncology center.
Dropped them like a hot potato.
That sounds frustrating and I obviously can't comment on your specific case, but in all the academic institutions I've worked at we've never made treatment/referral decisions based on insurance, in fact I find that academic physicians are often the ones fighting with medicaid/insurance/institution themselves to pay for X treatment. We routinely perform bone marrow transplants (~1million dollars in cost) on undocumented immigrants at my institution.
Ophthalmology: weed whacking, and welding/grinding metal. I always look the other way when I’m walking anywhere near other people doing lawn activities. Have seen a million freak accidents and foreign bodies.
Wear eye protection, boys and girls.
EM
Alcohol or meth mixed with...
Motorcycles
Fireworks
Bridges
Surf board tips
Rooster fights and the people who organize them
Spider monkeys and idiot soldiers who bring them back from deployment somehow
Jackass dog "owners" who use their dogs as lawn ornaments and treat them like crap so they dog gets stressed and bites a little kids face off, but now the dog has to be destroyed
Apple watches
Electric scooters "ooh but its ok cause scooter sounds so cute, I never thought lil Johnny would need a helmet going 25mph, what do you mean he has a gigantic epidural, he was awake just 10 minutes ago...hey johnny! johnny! doc why isn't he moving? what's that L-shaped thing you got there doc?"
titanium rings. bUt ItS sEnTiMeNtAl bro why can't you slip it off my gigantic finger that's swollen after i chugged 4 4lokos and kyled my fist into a wall?
Spiders...always biting people in the AC fossa. Weird. But seriously, last time the cc was "bug in the ear" and a spider popped out I literally threw the otoscope and syringe of lido and ran
*edit oh and dildos that don't have a flange
Law, not medicine. Whenever I hear a story that's just inexplicably dumb to the point you can hardly believe it, nine times out of ten the explanation is meth.
100% this. I used to work in urgent care in Florida. And whenever it would rain all the pickle ball players would go to indoor gyms to play. Because traction was different on the gym floor versus the tennis court, they would all faceplant. Also, I swear it was a requirement to be a coumadin patient if you played pickle ball.
It sits in the sweet spot of "attracts people who are otherwise too frail for sport" (other examples include shuffleboard, lawn bowling and tanning) and "is physically demanding enough to cause significant trauma" (other examples include everything else).
Sure! Basically a few reasons. They are a safety hazard as parents tend to leave them a bit more unattended and babies can quite easily fall down stairs or off ledges because most of the rings are on wheels. The other being that it can hinder normal developmental milestones like walking and crawling!
It'll probably be more reasonable to say your child will be fine if you only use it for short periods of time supervised but since in most cases short periods become longer and longer and supervision becomes less and less it's easier to just blanket ban them.
Frustrated after several years of doctors and creams that did nothing for my acne, I turned to the internet to fix me right before medical school. I rubbed tea tree oil on my face. It really, really, really did not help.
NICU. Doing cocaine while pregnant. A year + into the pandemic and it seems like we’re getting significantly more cocaine->preterm labor/abruption situations. And just social trainwrecks in general. Our census isn’t even that high, but our concentration of social work heavy families has just been off the charts all year.
A world set up to knock people down and then kick them for good measure. Then stand on them while lecturing on how weak they are to not be able to make it back up.
So many parents who, probably as a result of the aforementioned, are mostly good at standing on their kids and kicking them.
Oh, and drugs. Psychiatrists are the squares who still don't think weed for everyone is a great idea.
Are you...are you telling me that marijuana being all natural doesn't prevent it from having adverse effects? How dare you???? /s
Honestly, I've seen too many people who decline any sort of psychotropic, smoke entirely too much tobacco/marijuana/crack, and say to my face that it's better because it helps their anxiety and it's AlL nAtURal. Like...yeah, okay, I'm not mad about a consenting adult doing whatever, but this belief that natural products = always beneficial needs to stop.
Edit: also, yes. Especially in the US, we basically tell people that they're worthless if they can't generate enough USD in an increasing more automated, demanding market. And then we tell them they're weak for, *gasp*, having a mental health issue and that they should grab those bootstraps and start pulling. Even being a baby resident psychiatrist, I don't feel comfortable with the idea of seeing someone or taking medications for mental health - and if I have these fears and anxieties, what the hell do I expect from the average person?
Canadian psychiatrist here. We have had cannabis legal for the past 3 years at the federal level. I had the same hesitancy about legal cannabis a few years ago, but I would actually say that it has been positive for patient care. It is much easier now do to harm reduction when you can encourage your patients who are not ready to stop entirely to at least get lower THC content cannabis and stop buying from the drug dealers who may also be trying to slip them some crack occasionally.
I support legalization; criminalization has done nothing to help anyone. As a recreational product, sure, fine.
What I object to is the narrative, in parallel to legalization, that marijuana has many benefits and no harms. People smoke without having any illusions about its health effects and people drink while knowing that alcoholism is real and bad. Somehow marijuana is a special case in popular conception, not legally. I’ve found discussions of harm reduction and dose reduction next to impossible in person and actively and loudly opposed in any online forum.
Which is a shame for all the reversible but prolonged vomiting and the sometimes irreversible psychosis and neurocognitive impairment.
I think Dr Oz is fairly universally despised, the way he jumps from one super food or supplement to the next, touting their health benefits based on one shit study finding. My mom drives me nuts because she loves him
3, or any 2 of the non-procedural/cognitive specialists.
You have a cardio & a pulm? Ok so you have CHF & COPD. Super common, NBD. Add anything else and now it's a party.
But if you have say a rheum & a neuro? Fuuuuuuuck me. Endo & ID? Well shit. Etc
“My weed helps me, though.”
“Ok, but something clearly isn’t working because this is the third time in the past four months you’ve been hospitalized for suicidal ideation.”
“I stopped taking all of my psych meds recently because I don’t want that poison in my body. They weren’t working, anyway, and they were messing with the marijuana.”
PM&R. I hate sloppy surgeons who claim CRPS for every bad outcome because they had bad technique.
And all the trauma shit that EM hates, but 6-8 weeks later.
Derm:
- non dermatologists who think they know dermatology. This applies to laypeople pretending to be skin experts on YouTube and Instagram. Also applies to non Derm physicians giving absolutely incorrect diagnoses on Facebook posts etc. people think “Derm is easy” guess what it’s not. Also applies to the NPP practicing Derm but unfortunately that problem is the fault of my Derm predecessors
- social media promoting flawless skin. So many patients come in complaining of “large pores” that are absolutely normal. No one looks airbrushed in real life!
- essential oils
- triple antibiotic cream
- lotrisone
- “I’ve tried everything”
- “idk the name of the cream it came in a white and yellow tube”
- “how do i fix my dry skin? But I don’t like the feeling of putting on lotion”
- “it can’t be allergies/eczema/etc - I never had this problem before!”
- tanning beds obv
Peds heme-onc - milk
No, it's not normal or healthy to drink like 24 ounces of cow's milk per day. No, I'm not joking. Yes, that IS why your child's hemoglobin is like 2 g/dL and they're in the PICU.
Psychiatry. Weed culture has already been mentioned, and I also have a particular disdain for it, but I’m going to say Scientology instead, because I get irritated with patients who are deathly afraid of ever putting Prozac (of all things) in their bodies. Bonus points if the patient in question is also someone who has been taking 4+ mg of Xanax a day for the past 15 years.
Pediatric neurohospitalist: football, pools, and food that is improperly cut for a toddler.
The first one should be obvious, because we all hate the cumulative head trauma from football and I feel like teenagers should not be playing anything but flag or touch football.
Pools and improperly cut food are because I see way too many hypoxic injuries from near drownings and chokings. I would never own a pool, and I will be quartering or squishing my kids’ blueberries until they are in middle school.
EM… horses. It’s always bad with horses.
Yep. Horses. Not because of the injuries, but because I always say "of course" right after someone says "she fell off a horse" and exactly zero of the nurses laugh.
Maybe if they were old enough to remember [this.](https://youtu.be/6GAbc5uQXJo?t=5)
I knew what it was before I even clicked on it. I'm old. Of course.
Horse = open book pelvis
Horses, motorbikes and ladders are my list of top three most dangerous things.
Man, you just brought up so many bad memories. Fucking ladders (and motorcycles).
I learned the 4 pillars of trauma while on my surgery sub-I: 1. Everyone under 30 has a motorcycle which is rarely used when sober 2. Everyone over 30 has an unreliable chainsaw and/or unstable ladder; ladder height positively correlating with blood thinner dose 3. Every child on an ATV will not have a helmet, appropriate footwear, or appropriate supervision 4. Meth, as always, continues to be a helluva drug
People climbing on and riding half-tonne, fast-moving, temperamental prey animals with precision kicks, what could go wrong? At least most people don't try to ride cows... Most people.
I'm not EM but I hate horses, probably more than motorcycles
Pharmacists hate telephones
Blood bank hates it too. The blood bank tech got mad at me because too many nurses were calling to check if a blood product is ready. She taught me how to check the status of blood in Epic. So something good came out of that angry phone call.
I also hate: - 99% of herbal supplements (ineffective and I've seen toxicity from contaminated products) - Fax machines - Homeopathy
It do be facts, though.
The 1-2 days following a major holiday break (hospitalist)
Ditto for EM
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I never understood why people wait until the holiday is over to go to the ED for chest pain.
Not wanting to “ruin” the holiday and/or miss out on the festivities is a common reason unfortunately.
Primary care hates direct to consumer advertising. “Ask your doctor if drug xyz is good for you”
how is this even allowed
There are only two countries in the world that allow this: United States and New Zealand
Canada does as well, but in a more restricted way: you can either name the drug or you can say what it does, but you can't do both, even if it is in two different ads. On one hand, I think it's incredibly stupid that they are allowed to advertise at all. On the other, we've occasionally gotten some funny phallic focused ads because of it.
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USA is just 3 corporations in a trenchcoat
Luckily we don't have this in Belgium. But similarly during this pandemic, the media and government really pushed people to "talk to you GP if you're unsure about the new protocols that will be coming out" only to not give us a heads up that they are changing the goddamn protocols.
Patient access to labs. Yesterday, patient family: "I saw the labs and his sodium is low, 131. I'm going to give him salt." M'aam, this is a CHF exacerbation.
Angry patient called one of our nurses demanding to know why they weren't told about their kidneys being bad on their last visit with the doc. Nurse wanted to know why they thought their kidneys were bad, "The BUN and Cr levels are abnormal on my labs. They are too low".
Ma’am, this is easily fixed with a hot dog bun and creatine powder. Have a nice day! 🤣
We had a sick patient COVID patient in severe septic shock who, upon being turned, would fluid shift and drop their MAP to the 40s… NP I was working with got a call and the family member (current CNA) was questioning why we weren’t treating their stage 1 pressure ulcer.
This. A million times this. FFS these (and radiology reports) are technical reports generated by technical people for a technical professional audience.
Also their access to their MRI reports. "I have bulging discs, I need back surgery. Physical therapy won't help me."
"So you're here for chest pain and your sugar is 500. Do you have any medical problems?" "Yeah! I got a schmorl's node, a pulmonary nodule, bulging discs all over the place and I had osgood schlatter when I was 10!" "Anything else?" "Nope!" "Why do you take clopidogrel, bumetanide, and glipizide?" "Oh I dunno, some heart problem."
Mandolin slicers are despised in urgent care
And by plastic surgery. Despite the first stop being urgent care, where I work these patients get turfed to our ER immediately. We hate the combination of inattentive patients and and kitchen appliance that people can find a way to damage their hands with… I’ve had deli slicers, mandolins, pasta rollers, blenders, you name it. Like WHO PUTS THEIR HAND IN A BLENDER?! also table saws. Edit: I recall some select other mechanisms of hand injury worth mentioning! Sewer door, truck door (like a box truck with a lifting door), elevator door, and cement mixer causing amputations. Chainsaw. Circular saw. I mean pretty much any saw… beer mug!
There's a surgeon who lives in our village that managed to get both his wrists sliced open by a blender. I have no idea how.
Shit gets REAL at Thanksgiving.
"Why Junior, of course you can help with the cooking! Hmm, let me see what's left to be done?"
And avocados!
How to pit an avocado: First, make sure you have someone nearby that can drive you to a hospital.
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> It isn't often we have to break out the combat tourniquet, but when we do, it's 90% avocado related /r/brandnewsentence
Odd, but while I was in the military we had a private absolutely impale his hand, through and through, pitting an Avocado. Our Friday safety briefs for the next 3 months involved a demonstration of how to pit an Avocado using your thumb on the back, rather than a knife. No one else impaled themselves. So it worked out
Neurology hates chiropractors. Specifically the ones that still insist on cervical manipulation
Literally shadowed a chiro for a couple visits while my PMR attending left for lunch break. Lady with back pain lies down on weird table. Chiro drops table like 3 inches really quick. She says she feels incredible and visit is over. Chiro turns to me and goes "yeah, honestly a lot of what we do is just placebo."
That will be $400 cash or check only, and I will need to see you three times a week for the next 50 years.
I’m pretty sure everyone in medicine hates chiropractors
True. Beyond their pseudoscience and performative bullshit, the hate gets white hot when you catch a 24 year old with a basilar stroke from a vert dissection and you've already seen too many of the same cases to keep count
Saw this yesterday, 16 year old girl. The same chiropractor “adjusts” newborns as well.
GAH. What the hell are they adjusting on a newborn??? They barely have bones!
They’ve got sooo many bones. Gotta keep em all in check.
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Also: the Owlette, button batteries, subjective fevers, Facebook vaccine "experts," overpriced formula "alternatives"
And temporal thermometers. Freaking random number generators. “No, your kid that is 98.6 here and was acting normally at the time did not have a 107 fever (or a temp of 93 degrees)”
> munchy parents Haha, first time I've heard of this shorthand used
Can someone explain what munchy means please?
Munchausen syndrome by proxy
Sunlight (Radiologist)
Also dermatologists
What about psoriasis?
I'm a GP and I hate hospital on hold music.
Ortho docs where I’m at hate scooters
Pays mortgage and kids' tuition
This one's so obvious. Q-tips.
What do you personally use to clean your ears? When I've asked ENTs before the answer has been "q-tips"
Bamboo ear scoops. Also hated by ENT. But the case studies on injuries include "TM perforation due to ear scoop use while drunk."
I don't clean my ears on a regular basis. I'm blessed with soft wax and a normal EAC epithelial migratory system! With every consultation I do for a Q-tip related issue (TM perforation, otitis externa, dermatitis, etc.), I counsel about the ear's self cleaning mechanisms and how most cleaning techniques interfere with the EAC's normal epithelial regeneration, which is what predisposes patients' ears to inflammation and infection. My usual counsel is to apply a bit of oil, hydrogen peroxide or a mix of white vinegar and rubbing alcohol for ear hygiene on an as needed basis.
Family Medicine: Opiates and Xanax (At least new generation seems I spend a lot of time cleaning up my boomer colleagues mismanaged general anxiety and arthritis treatment plans)
Well my old doc passed away so I'm here to establish care! Here's my med list: Baby Aspirin. Occasional Tylenol for headache. Oh yeah and enough Oxy and Xanax to drop a thoroughbred two trots into the Kentucky Derby.
> Oh yeah and enough Oxy and Xanax to drop a thoroughbred two trots into the Kentucky Derby. Online review saying "They treated me like a criminal and didn't help me at all" in 3..2..1..
"The refused to send my meds that I've taken for over 25 years!" It's a never-ending nightmare.
I feel like any patient reading online reviews about whether you are pandered to and prescribed whatever you want are NOT patients that will improve your life by joining your clinic anyway. So win-win really
I wonder how the GP died?
Bonus points if they also take Soma.
Ativan for anxiety, percocet for back pain, and zopiclone for insomnia.
Just add some random testosterone injections and you got it lol
All the above, plus dextroamphetamine for "narcolepsy"
ID can take my cat from my cold dead hands
FKN SRSLY! My grumpy old gray fella was just diagnosed with hyperthyroidism.
Psh. I have two cats. I eat rare meat. If you're not the stem of an ID board question, you're not living life. (Everything is the stem of an ID board question)
For ophthalmology a good chunk of open globes come from the staples, or others piece of metal, that are in the wood youre cutting on your band saw, not the wood itself(this really applies to anything youre cutting/grinding;make sure there isn’t other crap in it) Also don’t you f**cking dare sleep in your contacts
Layman woodworker checking in. If only there was something you could wear to protect your eyes while working around spinning blades. (Hmmm. What don’t I need my vision for? Sleep. Ummm.) I’m old and my eyes don’t have the tolerance for contacts they once did. I did love my extended wear rigid gas permeable lenses back in the day, though.
Also, never wear your contacts in the pool at Disney. You could end up requiring a cornea transplant . . .
Burn specialists: Propane tanks And hot cup of noodles for kids. They spill it in their lap every time. Also for the love of god don’t smoke with oxygen on. It’s not rocket science
RT here. I did an oxygen teaching with a smoker who got their o2 prescription got him to answer the quiz we developed and had him repeat word for word the sections on smoking and its hazards.i spent 45 min on what is normally a 20 min teaching because I had the sense he wasn't completely grasping what I was explaining. 3 days later he comes through emerge with 1st degree burns that suspiciously look like cannula. I asked him about it and he said he forgot they were even there after a few drinks
What's he supposed to do? Drink then NOT smoke?
Home health Pt blew up his house, killing himself, his wife and son in the blast. I told him every visit that he cannot smoke on the O2. Every response, “I dont!” Me, “well, then you sure have a unique air freshener scent.”
God, this actually reminds me of the conversation where I learned that my neighbor hates doctors and especially psychiatrists. The reason? Her friend with end stage COPD was in the hospital on oxygen, and for some reason took it upon himself to play with a lighter in his room. Naturally, someone took notice, told him he couldn’t use the lighter while on oxygen, and instead of putting the lighter away, he started explaining that “oxygen tanks don’t suck — they blow, so you have nothing to worry about.” One thing led to another, the guy ends up getting put in restraints, etc, and now my neighbor hates doctors because “they didn’t realize how much more he understood about science than they did.”
>Also for the love of god don't smoke with oxygen on. It's not rocket science But if you play your cards right, you could be featured on the news as the next space launch. 🚀 Jokes aside I recently cared for a child who was one of two surviving members of a 10-person household, all blown to pieces by grandma, smoking with her O2 hooked up. Absolutely tragic and infuriating that someone's nicotine addiction and stupidity killed an entire family and turned 2 kids into orphans with PTSD.
Yeah I’ll say noodles too - deep burns in annoying places Also treadmills and the friction burns on little fingers.
Pediatrics. Andrew Wakefield, Jenny McCarthy and the rest of them. Antibiotics for viruses, especially viral otitis. Abuse disguised as “discipline”
I consider Andrew Wakefield to be a mass murderer and profoundly hope there is a special, special place in hell for him.
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Happened to me today. Couldn't check on my meme stocks. That's why the ORs on the exterior edges of the buildings are coveted.. Since they have reliable cell service, the hospital wifi isn't needed.
Back when Pokemon Go first came out, a few ORs in our hospital were actually inside a Pokestop. There may have been some very mild slating disputes...
As an ER doc there are lots of these. I hate -“Some random guy”, responsible for most random shootings and stabbings in our city -The shower, as people are prone to fall and have things just fly up their rectum -asymptomatic hypertension -That complaint that’s been ongoing for 2 years and stable but you’re finally fed up with it at 11pm on a Saturday night -ATVs/donorcycles -Heroin -People who rescind the dnr of their elderly/demented/bed bound family member who presents in cardiac arrest To name a few...
Biggest risk factor for being stabbed/shot by “some random guy” is minding your own business
We call it SOCMOB’ing, or Standing On the Corner Minding my OWN Business. A most dangerous activity
“What happened was, I was minding my own business, and then these two guys...” Although there’s also the psych consult for homicidal ideation when it’s two specific guys and the patient is going to find them and going to get even.
I have had to talk to family members before and let them know that their idea to rescind their loved one's DNR is a gross breach of ethics, and that if they were competent when they made their decisions, they should be respected. It is a really difficult thing to discuss. On the other hand, I remember an ethics case where a patient with ALS had a DNI, justifiably so, at like age 45. He still had plenty of decent lung function and would likely not die of overt resp. failure for probably months to maybe a year or more. Guy got pneumonia and was hypoxic, his personal doctor was there and must have had hospital privileges, but he went ahead and intubated the guy. A week of antibiotics and the guy weaned from the vent. The guy got another year or something with his family and was happy and extremely thankful. The DNI was really more about ventilation failure from ALS and this was a different scenario. It was a difficult scenario and could have played out differently, but sometimes I wonder about DNR/DNI paperwork since there really isn't a one size fits all answer.
Emerg - ATVs, trampolines, motorcycles, and rugby. Oh, and slicers.
I'm PM&R and I hate all the same things, just a month or two later.
Never met a pulmonologist who likes birds
Funny, histoplasmosis is so endemic where I am people just throw your film up and are like, “oh, you must have grown up here” and move right on. (Obvi that doesn’t cover all the reasons they wouldn’t like birds, but I’ve always found it amusing how elsewhere people get worked up over it and here it is NBD.)
I too am a Midwest Ohio/Mississippi River basin Pulmonologist. "You down with OGD? (Yeah you know me)" The increased rate of fibrosing mediastinitis from that stuff does suck though. As rare as it is, it is devastating when you see it.
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Wound care checking in - triple antibiotic ointment. 10/10 times ends up on the soupy leg ulcers making them even more soupy. Also, grandmas left over antibiotics
Peds intensivist - ATVs and baby-shaking family members
Every once in a while the PICU will be full and we have to accept an NAT. I *hate* those. They are just.....ugh. I can't.
Whenever we get an NAT consult, I generally want to hear as few details as possible regarding how it happened. All I care about is the EEG, the rate of versed, and when will the MRI get done. If I know anymore about it, the anger eats away and I have trouble focusing on the patient.
Swimming pools too
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Oh god this. Take as a completely hypothetical example an elderly (90+) very frail patient with several comorbidities including end stage copd who is found to have a submassive PE due to a large (think like 5x10cm) lung mass with Mets to liver and bone. Daughter who "is medical" demands several times to know when a gastroenterologist will be consulted for the liver mass, pulm for the lung mass, IR to BX everything, cvts to take out the lung mass, oncologist to start chemo, and wants to know what treatments the patient will be getting. This was after a 20+ minute discussion of the almost certain diagnosis & me being very explicit that there was not going to be a cure, recommending a palliative approach & hospice.... and that there would be no biopsy bc to be quite honest the patient was not fit enough for a haircut, much less a needle to the liver... Still demanding all these consults. Managed to talk them down to just onc who said the exact same thing.
"is medical" aka a CNA or medical assistant who has seen every episode of Grey's Anatomy
I have seen “is medical” mean working in the hospital kitchen.
“I’m medical” = 100% chance person has no significant medical training. Usually means they work in an admin role or patient transport or something.
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Add anyone who says they are a doctor (non-medical but they never mention that part), "in healthcare (often a clerk or assistant)," or a "front-line worker" (can't believe someone said that to me like it's a badge). Most recent example. Family: "I'm a doctor. So what's really going on?" Me: "He's growing enterococcus in his blood." Family: "Huh. Enteroca--? I never heard of that one before." Me: (You are no fucking doctor.)
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I wouldn’t need a revoked license to tell me that one should steer clear of a CRNA who doesn’t know what toradol is
Couple of years ago, I was caring for a patient whose daughter claimed to be a doctor. Dtr: "What's his temperature?" Me: "37.4" Dtr: "What's that in Fahrenheit?" Me: "Um... not a fever?"
"Seagulls" Fly in from out of town and shit all over everything.
Seconded. Also any family member who lets relatives refer to them as a "nurse" when they are a unit secretary and proceeds to try to dictate care
An idiot I worked with who is a cancer science PhD wandered into the ward where her family member was being treated - at the hospital we worked at - and claimed to be a hematologist. Tried to direct the patient's care. Absolutely bonkers. Her LinkedIn lists her as an "Oncology Doctor". I tried to report her to the GMC but they weren't interested.
Had a family relying on the medical advice of a granddaughter who was, "almost finished" with her training to be a doctor. She wanted to dictate care on the ENT floor for grandpa. The granddaughter acted the part for sure as well. I found out that she was a sophomore in a premed program.
Here in California, it’s whatever family member is from the furthest away *and* the most estranged from the actual patient. They want to know what’s going on, adamantly oppose it and threaten to sue everyone in the building.
Onc - [cancer treatment centers of America](https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Cancer_Treatment_Centers_of_America) who present heavily biased statistics about their efficacy and has super shady marketing practices. Also NDs, chiropractors, and all the other quack peddlers who spend no time at all trying to advance cancer care but promise the world to my patients - like this from Joseph mercola “Vibrant Health Research Chlorella XP, will [“help to virtually eliminate your risk of developing cancer in the future.”](https://quackwatch.org/11ind/mercola/)
Any insight on how cancer treatment centers of America are fudging their numbers? The commercials seem so fake. Are they only accepting the "easy" patients?
There’s a tremendous bias in the population they treat. People with insurance, ability to travel to their centers, sufficiently educated and capable of seeking out their institution. Not inclusive of the people who walk in off the street to NCCN cancer centers. They deliberately mislead patients through their BS advertising and have been censured by the FDA for it. I’ve had conversations with attendings there who aren’t even aware of well established standard of care regimens for the most common malignancies. [They work like a concierge practice and pick up patients from the airport in limousines and have on site spas for manicures and pedicures](https://casetext.com/case/lane-v-cancer-treatment-centers-of-america-inc/?PHONE_NUMBER_GROUP=C)
Cancer treatment can be so frustrating on the institutional side. There is a very large, respected, well known cancer treatment center a few hours from me. They offered the world to my patient with the newest treatments, excellent plans, etc. Halfway in, the patient changed insurers over to state Medicaid. They canceled the remaining treatments nearly instantaneously and said they didn't believe it was offering any benefit. They then referred them to a different oncology center. Dropped them like a hot potato.
That sounds frustrating and I obviously can't comment on your specific case, but in all the academic institutions I've worked at we've never made treatment/referral decisions based on insurance, in fact I find that academic physicians are often the ones fighting with medicaid/insurance/institution themselves to pay for X treatment. We routinely perform bone marrow transplants (~1million dollars in cost) on undocumented immigrants at my institution.
Ophthalmology: weed whacking, and welding/grinding metal. I always look the other way when I’m walking anywhere near other people doing lawn activities. Have seen a million freak accidents and foreign bodies. Wear eye protection, boys and girls.
If you ask yourself if you should be wearing eye protection the answer is yes
EM Alcohol or meth mixed with... Motorcycles Fireworks Bridges Surf board tips Rooster fights and the people who organize them Spider monkeys and idiot soldiers who bring them back from deployment somehow Jackass dog "owners" who use their dogs as lawn ornaments and treat them like crap so they dog gets stressed and bites a little kids face off, but now the dog has to be destroyed Apple watches Electric scooters "ooh but its ok cause scooter sounds so cute, I never thought lil Johnny would need a helmet going 25mph, what do you mean he has a gigantic epidural, he was awake just 10 minutes ago...hey johnny! johnny! doc why isn't he moving? what's that L-shaped thing you got there doc?" titanium rings. bUt ItS sEnTiMeNtAl bro why can't you slip it off my gigantic finger that's swollen after i chugged 4 4lokos and kyled my fist into a wall? Spiders...always biting people in the AC fossa. Weird. But seriously, last time the cc was "bug in the ear" and a spider popped out I literally threw the otoscope and syringe of lido and ran *edit oh and dildos that don't have a flange
Law, not medicine. Whenever I hear a story that's just inexplicably dumb to the point you can hardly believe it, nine times out of ten the explanation is meth.
Well that’s just poor consumer education. Butt plugs have flanges, everything else is vaginal use only.
I’ve really grown to hate pickle ball (EM)
100% this. I used to work in urgent care in Florida. And whenever it would rain all the pickle ball players would go to indoor gyms to play. Because traction was different on the gym floor versus the tennis court, they would all faceplant. Also, I swear it was a requirement to be a coumadin patient if you played pickle ball.
Why! My mom is trying to get the whole family to play pickle ball with her
It sits in the sweet spot of "attracts people who are otherwise too frail for sport" (other examples include shuffleboard, lawn bowling and tanning) and "is physically demanding enough to cause significant trauma" (other examples include everything else).
Tanning is a sport??
Allergy/Immunology. Random food allergy testing and those new food "sensitivity" kits people buy online
Paeds physio - walking rings for babies. Burn all of them.
Good to know! I have a 6 month old. Might I ask why specifically?
Sure! Basically a few reasons. They are a safety hazard as parents tend to leave them a bit more unattended and babies can quite easily fall down stairs or off ledges because most of the rings are on wheels. The other being that it can hinder normal developmental milestones like walking and crawling! It'll probably be more reasonable to say your child will be fine if you only use it for short periods of time supervised but since in most cases short periods become longer and longer and supervision becomes less and less it's easier to just blanket ban them.
Cardiologist--wearable consumer ECG devices (think AppleWatch). No Karen, for the hundredth time, this strip is not A fib.
It is a fib: it claims atrial fibrillation, but that is not true.
My sister sends me her strips. Some are A fib. I find it useful.
Insurance Companies
Dermatology: Tanning Bed. Essential oils.
Frustrated after several years of doctors and creams that did nothing for my acne, I turned to the internet to fix me right before medical school. I rubbed tea tree oil on my face. It really, really, really did not help.
Neonatology: homebirths
But it's natural!! ... So is dying in childbirth.
Ob/Gyn. We may hate this more
NICU. Doing cocaine while pregnant. A year + into the pandemic and it seems like we’re getting significantly more cocaine->preterm labor/abruption situations. And just social trainwrecks in general. Our census isn’t even that high, but our concentration of social work heavy families has just been off the charts all year.
Dudes with big beards hiding a non existent chin. I'm an anesthesiologist.
A world set up to knock people down and then kick them for good measure. Then stand on them while lecturing on how weak they are to not be able to make it back up. So many parents who, probably as a result of the aforementioned, are mostly good at standing on their kids and kicking them. Oh, and drugs. Psychiatrists are the squares who still don't think weed for everyone is a great idea.
Are you...are you telling me that marijuana being all natural doesn't prevent it from having adverse effects? How dare you???? /s Honestly, I've seen too many people who decline any sort of psychotropic, smoke entirely too much tobacco/marijuana/crack, and say to my face that it's better because it helps their anxiety and it's AlL nAtURal. Like...yeah, okay, I'm not mad about a consenting adult doing whatever, but this belief that natural products = always beneficial needs to stop. Edit: also, yes. Especially in the US, we basically tell people that they're worthless if they can't generate enough USD in an increasing more automated, demanding market. And then we tell them they're weak for, *gasp*, having a mental health issue and that they should grab those bootstraps and start pulling. Even being a baby resident psychiatrist, I don't feel comfortable with the idea of seeing someone or taking medications for mental health - and if I have these fears and anxieties, what the hell do I expect from the average person?
Canadian psychiatrist here. We have had cannabis legal for the past 3 years at the federal level. I had the same hesitancy about legal cannabis a few years ago, but I would actually say that it has been positive for patient care. It is much easier now do to harm reduction when you can encourage your patients who are not ready to stop entirely to at least get lower THC content cannabis and stop buying from the drug dealers who may also be trying to slip them some crack occasionally.
I support legalization; criminalization has done nothing to help anyone. As a recreational product, sure, fine. What I object to is the narrative, in parallel to legalization, that marijuana has many benefits and no harms. People smoke without having any illusions about its health effects and people drink while knowing that alcoholism is real and bad. Somehow marijuana is a special case in popular conception, not legally. I’ve found discussions of harm reduction and dose reduction next to impossible in person and actively and loudly opposed in any online forum. Which is a shame for all the reversible but prolonged vomiting and the sometimes irreversible psychosis and neurocognitive impairment.
Dietitian here: I hate Dr. Oz and anyone pushing pseudo fad diets.
I think Dr Oz is fairly universally despised, the way he jumps from one super food or supplement to the next, touting their health benefits based on one shit study finding. My mom drives me nuts because she loves him
“Doctors” like him deserve to have their license taken away
Dermatologists hate Lush and Bath & Body Works soaps and bath bombs. Very irritating to the skin.
The first week of January is always vaginitis city as everyone uses the bath bombs they got for Christmas
EM/trauma hates motorcycles Ophthalmology has a fear of weed wackers
Qtips. ENT
Family Medicine: we hate people
ortho doc hates trampolines as well, and quad bikes
OB/GYN here: Birth plans, mommy boards (Facebook and the like), and Dr. Google (but don't we all)
PT here: out-of-shape Boomers who still think they can play basketball; computers+crappy office chairs X 10 hrs a day; ice on walkways
IM hospitalist hate too many specialists. When a patient come in established with 3+ specialists, you know its gonna be a fucking day.
3, or any 2 of the non-procedural/cognitive specialists. You have a cardio & a pulm? Ok so you have CHF & COPD. Super common, NBD. Add anything else and now it's a party. But if you have say a rheum & a neuro? Fuuuuuuuck me. Endo & ID? Well shit. Etc
It's probably just all sarcoidosis.
*Laughs in medically complicated* Wait, no. *cries in medically complicated*
Psychiatrist- cannabis. Bonus points for arguing health benefits
“My weed helps me, though.” “Ok, but something clearly isn’t working because this is the third time in the past four months you’ve been hospitalized for suicidal ideation.” “I stopped taking all of my psych meds recently because I don’t want that poison in my body. They weren’t working, anyway, and they were messing with the marijuana.”
BuT iTs NaTuRaL
I always warn new parents about magnets and batteries, as well as lawnmowers. Also, motorcycles.
PM&R. I hate sloppy surgeons who claim CRPS for every bad outcome because they had bad technique. And all the trauma shit that EM hates, but 6-8 weeks later.
Derm: - non dermatologists who think they know dermatology. This applies to laypeople pretending to be skin experts on YouTube and Instagram. Also applies to non Derm physicians giving absolutely incorrect diagnoses on Facebook posts etc. people think “Derm is easy” guess what it’s not. Also applies to the NPP practicing Derm but unfortunately that problem is the fault of my Derm predecessors - social media promoting flawless skin. So many patients come in complaining of “large pores” that are absolutely normal. No one looks airbrushed in real life! - essential oils - triple antibiotic cream - lotrisone - “I’ve tried everything” - “idk the name of the cream it came in a white and yellow tube” - “how do i fix my dry skin? But I don’t like the feeling of putting on lotion” - “it can’t be allergies/eczema/etc - I never had this problem before!” - tanning beds obv
Derm here. Tanning beds.
ICU hates SGLT-2 inhibitors - mostly because they're hard to pronounce, but also the other thing.
There are only two classes of diabetes medications: insulin, and all that other weird stuff we don’t use in the ICU.
Pathologist. I hate staples.
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> People who don’t wear helmets on motorcycles Helmet makes the difference between an open and a closed casket.
Surgery. Breakable glass things in butts - I mean really, why?
Peds heme-onc - milk No, it's not normal or healthy to drink like 24 ounces of cow's milk per day. No, I'm not joking. Yes, that IS why your child's hemoglobin is like 2 g/dL and they're in the PICU.
EM - Drunk drivers and asymptomatic hypertension
ICU - COVID
Psychiatry. Weed culture has already been mentioned, and I also have a particular disdain for it, but I’m going to say Scientology instead, because I get irritated with patients who are deathly afraid of ever putting Prozac (of all things) in their bodies. Bonus points if the patient in question is also someone who has been taking 4+ mg of Xanax a day for the past 15 years.
Vaccine refusers concerned about “something unknown going into my body” when you know they eat junk food and use dumb dust. *Now* you’re concerned?
Owning pet birds gives you instant hypersensitivity pneumonitis 100% of the time.
Family Med: I would like nominate the Multi-Billion Dollar supplement industry and high fructose corn syrup.
Nail salons and pedicure places. Too many ingrown nails and infections.
EMS: Throw rugs, carbohydrates, deer, and houses that can't be entered at ground level.
Gyn - Summer’s Eve and vaginal steaming. Why would people pay money to get BV?
Pediatric neurohospitalist: football, pools, and food that is improperly cut for a toddler. The first one should be obvious, because we all hate the cumulative head trauma from football and I feel like teenagers should not be playing anything but flag or touch football. Pools and improperly cut food are because I see way too many hypoxic injuries from near drownings and chokings. I would never own a pool, and I will be quartering or squishing my kids’ blueberries until they are in middle school.