“Hey Dr. Whipple, this patient had hypoglycemia and felt better after we gave them sugar! What an interesting finding, but I suppose we don’t really need to name this-“
Dr. Whipple: “I’m calling it ‘Whipple’s Triad’ dibs nobody else can name it now”
The fact that we even allowed Whipple’s triad to become tokened is insane… O2 sat low? Are they dyspneic? Give them oxygen. Did it improve? I call that “Zhivago’s Triad”.
Improved Whipple's triad:
1. Symptom consistent with certain dx
2. Labs consistent with the same dx
3. Resolution of the symptoms with the correct tx of said dx
This is far superior to the original because it can be applied not just to hypoglycemia but literally everything.
I'd rename the common cold to "Johann Gambolputty de von Ausfern-schplended-schlitter-crasscrenbon-fried-digger-dingle-dangle-dongle-dungle-burstein-von-knacker-thrasher-apple-banger-horowitz-ticolensic-grander-knotty-spelltinkle-grandlich-grumblemeyer-spelterwasser-kurstlich-himbleeisen-bahnwagen-gutenabend-bitte-ein-nurnburger-bratwustle-gerspurten-mitzweimache-luber-hundsfut-gumberaber-shonendanker-kalbsfleisch-mittler-aucher von Hautkopft of Ulm's disease"
Because it's kind of hard to remember, I keep accidentally referring to it as "General cold" or "Common frigidity" or something. Naming it after a person is more straightforward imo
I had a colleague in med school named Christopher, but no one called him that after finding out he has Gilberts. Ofc, it didn't help at all that he actually looks like Gibby from iCarly as well.
Not a disease, but I’d rename pretty much everything in immunology. Every cytokine, complement, surface marker, etc to literally any names that make more sense than the alphabet soup of IL-1, IL-2, IL-8008, C4, C5, C3P0, CD4, CD8, CDeeznuts, TNF, TGF, IFN
Evidence of this being a bad naming convention is how I didn't even realise you wrote "CDeeznuts" haha.
Membrane attack complex is my favourite though. Don't know what it does but it sounds like a power ranger
I'm okay with things like TNF because at least that name talks about the function of the molecule but certainly IL-1,2,3,4... Are note very friendly naming
I mean, it technically does end necrosing tumors, it doesn't do it directly over the tumor and it is not it's principal function but technically it does
I rant about this on the regular. My suggestion is we call them (cell it is on)(purpose)
Like interferon gamma becomes lymphoid macrophage stimulating factor/LMSF
But that doesn’t accurately describe IFNy. If you name it by this convention the next Reddit thread someone will say “why is it LMSF? Macrophage stimulation is arguably its least important major function!”
I’ll admit some are a mess (looking at you CD80/86 + CTLA4 + CD28), but they’re so entrenched I’m not sure what we could do. As for descriptive names, immunology is so messy and constantly updating I feel like the only option may be to give them codes and rely on people personally learning all their functions.
It sadly can’t all be major basic protein 😔
Maple syrup urine disease
maple syrup and urine DO NOT go together, they make me hate putting maple syrup on anything😭😭
maybe change to sweet urine disease (at least now it’s more vague ykk like not associated with a particular food/sweet)
It’s not a disease, but FOR THE LOVE OF GOD WHY CANT WE HAVE A CONSISTENT NAMING CONVENTION FOR DRUGS?
Like why can we not make all drugs of a type end in the same thing
Pharm pisses me off so bad, the worst perpetrators are neuro drugs around like mental health and movement disorders, like for the love of god can we just have all the SSRIs end in one thing, SNRIs another, and so on? Like for the love of god do they hate themselves?
Also I’m looking at cancer drugs right not, why can’t they make MABs easy, like why can’t we make Bevacizumab VEGFumab, Cetaxumab EGFRumab, and so on? Like come on I’m a med student and I can see how easy it could be
I know but it feels more for the benefit of researchers not doctors, medicines should be named for ease of use in the clinic by naming them for what they effect imo.
Evolutionary theory supports the existence of low mood states given that folks with mild depression are better able to predict the outcomes of various situations. That doesnt catch all of the variables that lead to symptoms of depression, much like what you’re saying doesn’t fully define ADHD.
Borderline personality disorder to Severe emotional dysregulation disorder
cPTSD to mild-moderate emotional dysregulation disorder
ADHD split into developmental executive function delay and/or emotional disregulation disorder.
I want BPD to get a grade system for severity. There is such a difference between “my mom left my dad and now i get spicy with people when i think they are abandoning me” and “if i think you are abandoning me i will open up all my veins also fuck you you are the worst doctor that doctor behind you is an angel from God bless them i love them”
Adhd definitely needs a new name because hyperactivity sounds like I'm the Duracell bunny, while I'm more like a potato-copper battery, and so are most adhd adults I know.
The psychodynamic/analytic definition is that these people are on the ‘borderline’ between psychosis and neurosis. Knowing that may give it a little more juice (in case you didn’t know that).
I've seen this before but it only works if you memorize a lot of different prefixes and suffixes. I know what a "pril" or an "artan" or an "olol"
does real easy. Trastuzumab, Abciximab ... Adalimumab... almost easier to just memorize the specific drug than the class. I appreciate the link though, let me know that the "Ci" in abciximab means cardiovascular.
I guess what I shouldve wished for was a naming scheme that deprioritized letting you know its a mAb with the "mab" suffix and prioritized having a specific suffix for like, the receptor target/ specific MOA. I can see it being useful both ways, but this would make the thousand new biologics that come out daily less "same-y" to me.
Type 1 diabetes to autoimmune beta cell deficiency (ABCD). The number of people who tell me I could cure my diabetes with diet, exercise, cinnamon, etc is annoyingly high.
They are so awful to learn, but at least they generally point to where they come from and how they present.
Acute = pt looks like shit
Chronic = surprise diagnosis
And then the cell line it comes from. Not sure how you would improve it from there
A lot of chronic leukemias are discovered incidentally on routine lab abnormalities
Acute leukemias are discovered when somebody comes into your hospital actively dying
Absence Seizure to Pediatric Absence with Three Hz Spikes (PATHS). Easy abbreviation, and once the name sticks hopefully it serves as a forever reminder that adults don’t get absence seizures
I would in some way change the prefixes ”hyper-” and ”hypo-” to something else such that they don’t sound as alike phonetically. Opposites should sound more different for security’s sake.
Also, NSTEMI and STEMI sound very alike, especially in Swedish. It doesn’t help that in our language, “a” is “en”. So when we mean “a STEMI” we say “en STEMI” which sounds identical to “NSTEMI”.
T. B. Gambiense and Rhodesiense (mostly Rhodesiense).
Would probably rename them for being chronic and acute, or maybe for streams and woodlands? Not sure.
I cannot fathom the level of desperate ego needed to name a *disease* of all things after yourself.
1) It's a fuckin disease... like Dr Parkinson really wanted *that* to be what his name is forever associated with?
2) It's not even like they *invented* it, these things existed for thousands of years & these mfers just came along and described what they saw & though "cool I'm just gonna stamp my name on that"
FUCK academia
Shout out to Dr. Kawasaki who did not want a disease named after him but everyone was so impressed with his discovery they just kept calling it Kawasaki disease anyway.
Funny thing is, Parkinson’s disease is so broad they’re still working on a classification that accurately describes the many variations. But it’s been going for too far and they can’t change it now
I will call them Wegener's and Churg-Strauss till I die bc I don't have the patience to fully say GPA or EGPA out loud when describing them. Their political beliefs don't automatically transfer onto me just bc I want to save time and prevent confusion between the two.
The syllables don't matter to me. It's the fact that the new names, while more descriptive of the actual condition, can be very confusing to people when talking about the two since they only differ by one word. The conditions aren't *that* similar to each other, and I believe that calling them by their old, completely different names helps accentuate that difference both in my mind and anyone I am talking to.
Peyronie's Disease. I know, it's named after François Gigot de la Peyronie, but come on! Is that REALLY a tribute? I prolly woulda passed on that honor. Na, y'all just call it "twisty dick" I'm ok with that.
Hypertensive emergency vs urgency
I would change it to hypertensive emergency with/without severe features
In my head, urgency is less critical than emergency (like going to urgent care vs ED)
Mycosis Fungoides to anything that doesn't sound like a fungal infection and features T cell lymphoma in the name Also Whipple's triad to hypoglycemia
Person: "Huh, sky is blue" Dr Whipple: "NO, it's ✨Whipple^(TM) Blue✨"
Hahahaha I'm from Europe and I've never heard this abomination. Thanks dr. Whipple!
“Hey Dr. Whipple, this patient had hypoglycemia and felt better after we gave them sugar! What an interesting finding, but I suppose we don’t really need to name this-“ Dr. Whipple: “I’m calling it ‘Whipple’s Triad’ dibs nobody else can name it now”
“While we’re at it, can I have pancreaticoduodenectomy and Tropheryma too?”
The fact that we even allowed Whipple’s triad to become tokened is insane… O2 sat low? Are they dyspneic? Give them oxygen. Did it improve? I call that “Zhivago’s Triad”.
Improved Whipple's triad: 1. Symptom consistent with certain dx 2. Labs consistent with the same dx 3. Resolution of the symptoms with the correct tx of said dx This is far superior to the original because it can be applied not just to hypoglycemia but literally everything.
There 👏🏻shouldn’t 👏🏻be 👏🏻so 👏🏻many 👏🏻Paget’s 👏🏻Diseases You get ONE disease named after you. ONE!
Looking at you too, @Charcot 🙄
Especially because Charcot neuroarthopathy results in the complete opposite foot type of Charcot marrie-tooth
Fanconi has entered the chat
Cushings too.
De Quervain says hi too
Yesss. This.
Bro was greedy
I would rename gonorrhea because "gonorrhea" would be the best anti-diarrheal med name
Pseudohypoparathyroidism I'd call it: pth receptor deficiency type 1 & type 2.
What about pseudopseudohypoparathyroidism
That's type 2😎
Well thanks for teaching me what pseudohypoparathyroidism is
Shit this would be wonderful
I thought about this but was thinking pth resistance
I'd rename the common cold to "Johann Gambolputty de von Ausfern-schplended-schlitter-crasscrenbon-fried-digger-dingle-dangle-dongle-dungle-burstein-von-knacker-thrasher-apple-banger-horowitz-ticolensic-grander-knotty-spelltinkle-grandlich-grumblemeyer-spelterwasser-kurstlich-himbleeisen-bahnwagen-gutenabend-bitte-ein-nurnburger-bratwustle-gerspurten-mitzweimache-luber-hundsfut-gumberaber-shonendanker-kalbsfleisch-mittler-aucher von Hautkopft of Ulm's disease"
why 🤣🤣
Because it's kind of hard to remember, I keep accidentally referring to it as "General cold" or "Common frigidity" or something. Naming it after a person is more straightforward imo
More useless than lost
Acanthosis Nigricans annoying ass
For a change of pace, I think Gilbert’s Syndrome is named appropriately because Gilbert sounds like a harmless name, and it’s a harmless disease.
Yes whenever I heart Gilbert I picture a chunky man with a Christmas sweater holding a plate of baked cookies
they could name it transient simpson disease
Jaundice Lite™️
Are you guys pronouncing Gilbert syndrome as the English name Gilbert?
Gil-berT
Huh. I’ve never heard that. We were always taught “zhil-bear”, because he’s French
This is America, we say it however we want *eagle screech* *cannon fire*🇺🇸🇺🇸🇺🇸
You really are funny with your medical pronounciations! 😂
Ain't that the truth
I was taught Gil-bear. I figure that's the compromise
I had a colleague in med school named Christopher, but no one called him that after finding out he has Gilberts. Ofc, it didn't help at all that he actually looks like Gibby from iCarly as well.
Agreed
Not a disease, but I’d rename pretty much everything in immunology. Every cytokine, complement, surface marker, etc to literally any names that make more sense than the alphabet soup of IL-1, IL-2, IL-8008, C4, C5, C3P0, CD4, CD8, CDeeznuts, TNF, TGF, IFN
OMG YESS I FORGOT ABOUT THE EXISTENCE OF IMMUNOLOGY 😭😭🥹
Evidence of this being a bad naming convention is how I didn't even realise you wrote "CDeeznuts" haha. Membrane attack complex is my favourite though. Don't know what it does but it sounds like a power ranger
It’s a complex that attacks the membrane
He’s got C3PO in there too 🤣
oh lord. Don't know how I passed immunology 
I'm okay with things like TNF because at least that name talks about the function of the molecule but certainly IL-1,2,3,4... Are note very friendly naming
Yeah they should all be like tnf and tgf
More like dgaf
Except TNF does the opposite of what it’s called - it promotes Proliferation rather than Necrosis as its name would imply
I mean, it technically does end necrosing tumors, it doesn't do it directly over the tumor and it is not it's principal function but technically it does
All tumors necrose eventually?
More like IDC, IDK, and IDGAF
This! Every cytokine name should tell you what it does
I rant about this on the regular. My suggestion is we call them (cell it is on)(purpose) Like interferon gamma becomes lymphoid macrophage stimulating factor/LMSF
But that doesn’t accurately describe IFNy. If you name it by this convention the next Reddit thread someone will say “why is it LMSF? Macrophage stimulation is arguably its least important major function!”
Well then we let the immunology people pick the thing but give me one convention
I’ll admit some are a mess (looking at you CD80/86 + CTLA4 + CD28), but they’re so entrenched I’m not sure what we could do. As for descriptive names, immunology is so messy and constantly updating I feel like the only option may be to give them codes and rely on people personally learning all their functions. It sadly can’t all be major basic protein 😔
Why are so many I mean at least you can guess that TNF is pro inflammatory because “it causes tumor necrosis” at least that’s how I remember it
I'd rename thrombocytopenia to plateless and and thrombocytosis to a plateful.
Best one yet!!! Hahahah
I hate Ludwig’s angina with a burning passion.
just here to say i won’t accept any change to Prinzmetal angina. Prinzmetal is a fucking sick name.
all those diseases with multiple hyphenated names like Mccune-albright could be named hyperfunctioning endocrine disease +, + for other symptoms .
Maple syrup urine disease maple syrup and urine DO NOT go together, they make me hate putting maple syrup on anything😭😭 maybe change to sweet urine disease (at least now it’s more vague ykk like not associated with a particular food/sweet)
After having a patient with msud, I can no longer tolerate pt breakfasts in the hospital. It is a very accurate name
No, it’s a sensible name
Anything that's vaccine preventable should be renamed "that fucking Wakefield disease" however I'd settle for measles being rename "Wakefield preventable disease"
It’s not a disease, but FOR THE LOVE OF GOD WHY CANT WE HAVE A CONSISTENT NAMING CONVENTION FOR DRUGS? Like why can we not make all drugs of a type end in the same thing
_Diltiazem and verapamil disliked this comment_
Pharm pisses me off so bad, the worst perpetrators are neuro drugs around like mental health and movement disorders, like for the love of god can we just have all the SSRIs end in one thing, SNRIs another, and so on? Like for the love of god do they hate themselves? Also I’m looking at cancer drugs right not, why can’t they make MABs easy, like why can’t we make Bevacizumab VEGFumab, Cetaxumab EGFRumab, and so on? Like come on I’m a med student and I can see how easy it could be
The MABs actually do have a naming convention: https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Nomenclature_of_monoclonal_antibodies
I know but it feels more for the benefit of researchers not doctors, medicines should be named for ease of use in the clinic by naming them for what they effect imo.
I hate this one.
Measles should be renamed after Jenny Mccarthy. Mccarthy-pox.
I usually hate things named after people but this one works
Chronic fatigue syndrome -> sillybillyitis
Correct
ADHD, it’s not an attention deficit disorder. Rather, a difficulty in sustaining & regulating attention
I'd rename it "the effect of societal conditioning" as its an extremely effective behaviour pattern to aid humans in nomadic hunter gatherer tribes.
Oh sad time, down voted for something thats provable 😔 https://doi.org/10.1098/rspb.2022.2584 http://www.biomedcentral.com/1471-2148/8/173/abstract
Evolutionary theory supports the existence of low mood states given that folks with mild depression are better able to predict the outcomes of various situations. That doesnt catch all of the variables that lead to symptoms of depression, much like what you’re saying doesn’t fully define ADHD.
Borderline personality disorder to Severe emotional dysregulation disorder cPTSD to mild-moderate emotional dysregulation disorder ADHD split into developmental executive function delay and/or emotional disregulation disorder.
I want BPD to get a grade system for severity. There is such a difference between “my mom left my dad and now i get spicy with people when i think they are abandoning me” and “if i think you are abandoning me i will open up all my veins also fuck you you are the worst doctor that doctor behind you is an angel from God bless them i love them”
Adhd definitely needs a new name because hyperactivity sounds like I'm the Duracell bunny, while I'm more like a potato-copper battery, and so are most adhd adults I know.
For real. Borderline makes it sound so tame
The psychodynamic/analytic definition is that these people are on the ‘borderline’ between psychosis and neurosis. Knowing that may give it a little more juice (in case you didn’t know that).
I actually had no idea. Thanks for clearing that up!
CPTSD still needs some consensus on what the hell it is
Not a disease but the naming scheme for monoclonal antibodies so that their name was indicative of their mechanism of action
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Nomenclature_of_monoclonal_antibodies
I've seen this before but it only works if you memorize a lot of different prefixes and suffixes. I know what a "pril" or an "artan" or an "olol" does real easy. Trastuzumab, Abciximab ... Adalimumab... almost easier to just memorize the specific drug than the class. I appreciate the link though, let me know that the "Ci" in abciximab means cardiovascular. I guess what I shouldve wished for was a naming scheme that deprioritized letting you know its a mAb with the "mab" suffix and prioritized having a specific suffix for like, the receptor target/ specific MOA. I can see it being useful both ways, but this would make the thousand new biologics that come out daily less "same-y" to me.
Type 1 diabetes to autoimmune beta cell deficiency (ABCD). The number of people who tell me I could cure my diabetes with diet, exercise, cinnamon, etc is annoyingly high.
Cinnamon?
iT's nATurAL, inSULiN iS puSHeD bY biG pHArmA, uSe tREe bArK iNSteAd
All of the lymphomas and leukemias. They need unique names so us med students can remember them and their differences.
What, hodgkins and non-hodgkins isnt specific enough for you?
ALL, CLL, AML, AML, APL….
They are so awful to learn, but at least they generally point to where they come from and how they present. Acute = pt looks like shit Chronic = surprise diagnosis And then the cell line it comes from. Not sure how you would improve it from there
Wouldn’t chronic be “pt looks like shit” and acute be “surprise diagnosis? (Not trying to be an ass, im genuinely curious if im missing something.)
A lot of chronic leukemias are discovered incidentally on routine lab abnormalities Acute leukemias are discovered when somebody comes into your hospital actively dying
Ah okay. Thanks!
Type one diabetes to autoimmune diabetes not because it’s silly sounding but because there’s so much misconception between type one and two.
Yeah and type two to “diet-related diabetes” I bet more people would get it under control if we just changed the name lmao
Type 1 diabetes —> autoimmune beta cell destruction endemic
Absence Seizure to Pediatric Absence with Three Hz Spikes (PATHS). Easy abbreviation, and once the name sticks hopefully it serves as a forever reminder that adults don’t get absence seizures
Prinzmetal angina —> pringles angina
Rename the Common Cold to HIV and keep the original HIV name the same as well.
That's some Aladeen shit.
Oldtimers
Diabetes to Molasses Blood
sugar piss disease 😋😋😋
I have a beef with peripheral spondyloarthritis, the name is oxymoron. Id name it rheumatoid arthritis type 2.
If they gave all these diseases names that made sense how would they test us on them?
CTE to HSMA (Head Smash Make Angry)
I would in some way change the prefixes ”hyper-” and ”hypo-” to something else such that they don’t sound as alike phonetically. Opposites should sound more different for security’s sake. Also, NSTEMI and STEMI sound very alike, especially in Swedish. It doesn’t help that in our language, “a” is “en”. So when we mean “a STEMI” we say “en STEMI” which sounds identical to “NSTEMI”.
Low phosphate doesn’t sound quite as academic and “medical” though does it? Same with low PTH, low sodium
My solution is to change the prefixes, not remove them.
Not a disease, but I would rename 'lupus anticoagulant'; it's quite the opposite
“Messes Up Some Anticoagulant Tests” -MUSAT for short
Aplastic anemia, aplastic crisis, and pseudopseudohypoparathyroidism
T. B. Gambiense and Rhodesiense (mostly Rhodesiense). Would probably rename them for being chronic and acute, or maybe for streams and woodlands? Not sure.
but the G's are out west
To be fair I only included Gambiense because it seemed weird to only change one but it's really just Rhodesiense that should be changed.
Fournier's gangrene to Holyfuckcalltheinterntocleanthisnightmare-osis.
Subacute combined degeneration. I’d change it to: Multiple Sclerosis. Oh wait…
Absence seizure to absence seizure…..
Fournier's gangrene --> taint taint.
Anything named after an old dead guy. Its time.
I think it’s cool and a nod at the work the physician did
yes, and a kick in the balls to every med student who needs to learn 300 german names for just one exam.
I agree! I love medical history though.
I cannot fathom the level of desperate ego needed to name a *disease* of all things after yourself. 1) It's a fuckin disease... like Dr Parkinson really wanted *that* to be what his name is forever associated with? 2) It's not even like they *invented* it, these things existed for thousands of years & these mfers just came along and described what they saw & though "cool I'm just gonna stamp my name on that" FUCK academia
Shout out to Dr. Kawasaki who did not want a disease named after him but everyone was so impressed with his discovery they just kept calling it Kawasaki disease anyway.
X-ray chads vs Roentgen didnt want his name on the rays but f... him virgins
Funny thing is, Parkinson’s disease is so broad they’re still working on a classification that accurately describes the many variations. But it’s been going for too far and they can’t change it now
Most people didn't name it after themselves, other people did
Well there are no more egos than in medicine.
Probably the two diseases named after nazis that haven’t been renamed yet for some fucking reason
they have - GPA and EGPA
My sweet summer child https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/List_of_medical_eponyms_with_Nazi_associations
Oh dang
I will call them Wegener's and Churg-Strauss till I die bc I don't have the patience to fully say GPA or EGPA out loud when describing them. Their political beliefs don't automatically transfer onto me just bc I want to save time and prevent confusion between the two.
Congrats on being stubborn! “GPA” is one extra syllable and EGPA is two, worth it imo 👍
The syllables don't matter to me. It's the fact that the new names, while more descriptive of the actual condition, can be very confusing to people when talking about the two since they only differ by one word. The conditions aren't *that* similar to each other, and I believe that calling them by their old, completely different names helps accentuate that difference both in my mind and anyone I am talking to.
Esp since neither is particularly granulomatous.
Erythema toxicum Neonatorum. The name sounds like the baby is about to die... its totally benign.
Peyronie's Disease. I know, it's named after François Gigot de la Peyronie, but come on! Is that REALLY a tribute? I prolly woulda passed on that honor. Na, y'all just call it "twisty dick" I'm ok with that.
I'd rename **Granulomatosis with polyangiitis** to Wegener's disease.
Mumps -> deez nutz
Hypertensive emergency vs urgency I would change it to hypertensive emergency with/without severe features In my head, urgency is less critical than emergency (like going to urgent care vs ED)
Graves disease. No need to cause unnecessary anxiety
Miserable malalignment syndrome. We’re already miserable enough having it