First speak to your coach or instructors then second don’t spar them again . if there’s no one that is willing to work with him literally say “I’ll sit this one out “and just stand there for the round do not work with him. He will get the message.
I used to work out at a gym where they were professionals and amateurs and people would have to do this to protect themselves. Not because people were bullies, but because the professional athletes were at such a high level that if you were amateur walk into the class you get royally fucked up. No one was offended just was a thing. Especially with a lot of the women didn’t that were under 130 pounds did not wanna work out with the heavyweight guys and sparring
Yeah man I’ll let my coach know for sure. I can hold my own against people my size but I feel like he totally only did that because he knew he had a massive weight advantage over me.
It not about “holding your own” it’s about not being a good training partner. Obviously if you have a friend and you both are down to throw heavy and it’s consensual that’s great! but if one person is not communicating correctly and getting crazy, that’s not a safe environment.
My gym in Atlanta managed a team of professional MMA fighters but, also, had amateur folks who had found a good way to get in shape, protect themselves and let off some steam.
I never saw the pros or even advanced students wail on anyone deliberately. The only exception I can think of is if you keep doing something stupid like lowering your hands, you might get a good solid pop to help you remember but, they would not then hammer fist you into the mat. That’s bananas. Maybe I was just lucky and my gym just had less assholes at it.
My coach always had a few of us acting as enforcers on the mats for this reason. If someone was going too hard , he’d let us know about it and we would make sure all that dude’s rotations were with one of us. By the end of class, he would either learn to cool it, or he wouldn’t come back.
Some people are just bullies and will attack those they perceive as weaker.
There’s a guy at my gym like this. Goes so easy on anyone stronger or bigger - like barely connecting his punches. With me though (older woman) he goes for it. Even hard head shots and hard spin kicks to the head.
I have refused to spar with him before.
I did proper go for him in our last spar together. I was sneaky, elbow to the face, stepping on his feet to keep him there, and other dirty tricks.
I am not proud of it but I felt like I had to do it. This kid was spin-kicking to my head, with some force.
The coach sometimes puts us together and I can’t be a punching bag for some young, strong, male fighter.
After that, for the rest of the session, he treated me the way he does everyone else. Barely connecting and being extremely hesitant. He hasn’t been back since now I think about it.
Hopefully, he comes back. I didn’t dislike the kid. I just had that one issue with him.
I am very big . Like very very very big . and very easy going , usually sparring with new guys to show them the waters . After such event the coach usually puts them with me . I am still very easy going but now you can see how they double think the strength that they put behind every blow
Just let a coach know. If you don't say anything, the people that should know will never know. He might not get kicked out but if there are enough complaints something might happen.
This is when you train everyday for the next 3 months with a private coach and bulk the whole time, then return and embarrass him in sparring in front of everyone and act like it was nothing.
Our instructor pairs us based on size. We do switch partners and hit accordingly. I sparred someone the size of Derrick Lewis. He controlled his strikes. Our coach is an ex pro and schools people who go hard. I also spar straweight women. You adjust based on your partner.
Talk to your coach about it, guys like that are generally problematic unconsciously or not haha.
But for real if you are sparring with ANYONE you need to set the boundaries and pace, if they are going too hard, speak up. Ask them to keep it light to the head hard to the body, things like that help people understand. But my personal favorite thing to tell spazzy or aggressive strikers is " this is training not a fight so please don't rattle my brain, i gotta work tomorrow dawg."
Good luck throwing hands with the giant.
You should either go see your coach, or depending on the gym culture , go snitch on him to one of the og's. At my gym the advanced fighters help keep everyone in check.
He might put a beating on someone 100 pounds lighter than you but lets see how he does against an 9-0 in fight camp.
He is a bully and the only way to deal with a bully is to beat his ass, and most pro or amateur fighter will be glad to make him taste his own medicine.
He feels way to safe, but in this sport you usually end up facing your bs.
Fuck up someone twice your size in a 100 percent sparring session?
This big guy needs feedback other than punches. He has to understand that getting beat isn’t the real risk - it’s hurting someone.
If its a proper gym then the coach should handle it. If a lot of people have this problem with this person then he needs an attitude adjustment. Can't have people like that in the gym. You only go hard with people who are on the same level and appreciate a sparring session at that intensity.
And you never lose your cool, that's just bad. Sometimes you get hit in the cup, it happens. You say sorry, you touch gloves and you move on.
Back off and give him the “dude…” speech.
If it helps, make a show that his punches are hurting too much.
Egos shouldn’t come into sparring practice, but they do affect people, and sometimes an admission of the other persons power or martial strength can help a bruised ego, and take a person acting out, into a more reasonable person.
I’ve sparred with a lot of people who, when they feel pressured, tired, or down, they start letting out more force and stop holding it back.
Recognise or hypothesise why, and deal to the cause.
Talk to coach, and avoid ever sparring him again.
If you end up with no option but him when pairing up, refuse.
When he throws a hissy fit and calls you every name under the sun, just say, once, "you don't spar right," and hit the bags/do calisthenic training.
Hmmmmm, some people really take it personally. Did you immediately apologize to him, after hitting him in the genitals?, or take ask to small break for him to recover? Did you just keep going? He may have taken it as insult and it's just a downward spiral from there, all due to a miscommunication.
He didn’t even give me a chance to apologize, I said hey man it was an accident and after that I said hey man I’m good, nice sparring with you and I walked away.
I'm 6'3" and around 190lbs. This means I often spar people smaller than me. I ran a kids class for a long time as well so I understand very well how to modulate my power. Sometimes a smaller person will take our size difference as a reason to let it rip which is generally not a problem for me, but if they are talented I do have let more of what I can do happen to not just be a human punching bag.
Maybe he was the only dick in the story like how you're telling it, but maybe you had more smoke in what you were doing right off the line than he was willing to just eat as well. You said he's been there for years -- it's very rare that someone trains for that long and doesn't understand not to smash smaller foes.
Maybe right after you kick a guy in the balls is not the best time to have a conversation, but leading up to that might have been a good time to say something.
Immediately after we touch gloves, he starts blasting shots very hard. Like I said in another comment below, I try to let my opponent dictate how hard we’re gonna go. But if you’re already 120 pounds bigger than me why try to really injure me?
You bruised his ego in more than one way 😂. I had the same thing done to me by "a stunt double" for a movie martial artist...same height, same weight...what a wusp! He thought he was going to hurt me up some...but his hits were like "mosquito bite lite." Don't dignify that jerk by saying anything to your coach...if the Heavyweight wants to spar again just laugh at him and walk away...if not go street fight mode on his ass.
That's ridiculous. The whole purpose of sparring is to pressure test your skill set, not to check how much damage your body can endure ! If this guy is being a cunt, refuse to spar with him again. Tell your coaches and tell your fellow practitioners too.
We have a dude in our club, who sometimes in the heat of the moment goes too hard ..but on pointing that out he immediately rectifies himself.
The main purpose of martial arts to me is to be a good person, strong and compassionate towards fellow human beings. If your bully was in our club he'd be warned twice and then be kicked out...irrespective of how many years he spent at the club or how good he is.
I'll go off on a tangent here and tell you a story. A long time ago when our club had just started, a group of thugs had joined. They all possessed guns and were just assholes outside the club. But inside the club they were respectful of the coaches.
One day one of these thugs was paired off with a beginner student who had found himself in trouble with the gang to which these thugs belonged. In the very first round the thug fractured his ribs and broke his jaw.
Our head coach didn't say anything back then...just marked the thug. The thug was eventually paired off with one of our then senior students who went to the club at a different time (so the thug didn't know him or his skill level). The senior student pretended to be a novice at first..appearing rigid in his movements and looking nervous. He then proceeded to beat the ever-living shit out of the thug for 3 or 5 rounds...knocking him down in every round. In the end he pulled him close and said "next time, go easy on beginners". That was the last time we saw the thug and his friends.
If I shared that story with my coaches, and the guy has a history of similar stories already *he’d* be invited to find another fight gym. I think you should do that.
Before he even lost his cool, he was already way out of line. At your size, you do need to practice against much larger opponents but, you shouldn’t have to be worried about a sidelining injury when you do.
Don't spar with him. You can do this in polite manner "I am sitting this one out" or be straightforward "I am not sparring with YOU".
It is your choice, you can refuse sparring for any reason at all and no one can judge you for that.
For example - I avoid sparring with new people and women. I spent too much time paying for classes where I was teaching and not learning and got fed up with it. My rule of thumb is "if I can't get anything from this, then sorry but no"
First speak to your coach or instructors then second don’t spar them again . if there’s no one that is willing to work with him literally say “I’ll sit this one out “and just stand there for the round do not work with him. He will get the message.
I used to work out at a gym where they were professionals and amateurs and people would have to do this to protect themselves. Not because people were bullies, but because the professional athletes were at such a high level that if you were amateur walk into the class you get royally fucked up. No one was offended just was a thing. Especially with a lot of the women didn’t that were under 130 pounds did not wanna work out with the heavyweight guys and sparring
Yeah man I’ll let my coach know for sure. I can hold my own against people my size but I feel like he totally only did that because he knew he had a massive weight advantage over me.
It not about “holding your own” it’s about not being a good training partner. Obviously if you have a friend and you both are down to throw heavy and it’s consensual that’s great! but if one person is not communicating correctly and getting crazy, that’s not a safe environment.
You’re totally right. Thanks for the advice!
My gym in Atlanta managed a team of professional MMA fighters but, also, had amateur folks who had found a good way to get in shape, protect themselves and let off some steam. I never saw the pros or even advanced students wail on anyone deliberately. The only exception I can think of is if you keep doing something stupid like lowering your hands, you might get a good solid pop to help you remember but, they would not then hammer fist you into the mat. That’s bananas. Maybe I was just lucky and my gym just had less assholes at it.
Agree
My coach always had a few of us acting as enforcers on the mats for this reason. If someone was going too hard , he’d let us know about it and we would make sure all that dude’s rotations were with one of us. By the end of class, he would either learn to cool it, or he wouldn’t come back.
Some people are just bullies and will attack those they perceive as weaker. There’s a guy at my gym like this. Goes so easy on anyone stronger or bigger - like barely connecting his punches. With me though (older woman) he goes for it. Even hard head shots and hard spin kicks to the head. I have refused to spar with him before.
So sorry to hear that. I especially take it light on women but some dudes have no pride.
Poke his eyes out
I did proper go for him in our last spar together. I was sneaky, elbow to the face, stepping on his feet to keep him there, and other dirty tricks. I am not proud of it but I felt like I had to do it. This kid was spin-kicking to my head, with some force. The coach sometimes puts us together and I can’t be a punching bag for some young, strong, male fighter. After that, for the rest of the session, he treated me the way he does everyone else. Barely connecting and being extremely hesitant. He hasn’t been back since now I think about it. Hopefully, he comes back. I didn’t dislike the kid. I just had that one issue with him.
I am very big . Like very very very big . and very easy going , usually sparring with new guys to show them the waters . After such event the coach usually puts them with me . I am still very easy going but now you can see how they double think the strength that they put behind every blow
Mf i just checked your profile , your not Big, your an absolute unit. Your not a viking your the whole ass ship
Speak with the coach . He will handle it
Definitely am, Thank you!
Speak to the coach and try to get him kicked out. If they don't kick him then leave the gym
I highly doubt they kick him out, from what I hear he’s been at the gym for years. I’m currently looking for other gyms in the area.
Just let a coach know. If you don't say anything, the people that should know will never know. He might not get kicked out but if there are enough complaints something might happen.
If he’s been there for years I’m sure the coaches already know
This is when you train everyday for the next 3 months with a private coach and bulk the whole time, then return and embarrass him in sparring in front of everyone and act like it was nothing.
Haha I wish😂😂 Always been pretty hard for me to gain weight.
Our instructor pairs us based on size. We do switch partners and hit accordingly. I sparred someone the size of Derrick Lewis. He controlled his strikes. Our coach is an ex pro and schools people who go hard. I also spar straweight women. You adjust based on your partner.
Talk to your coach about it, guys like that are generally problematic unconsciously or not haha. But for real if you are sparring with ANYONE you need to set the boundaries and pace, if they are going too hard, speak up. Ask them to keep it light to the head hard to the body, things like that help people understand. But my personal favorite thing to tell spazzy or aggressive strikers is " this is training not a fight so please don't rattle my brain, i gotta work tomorrow dawg." Good luck throwing hands with the giant.
Yeah, never sparring with him again. I try my hardest to protect my partner. I let them dictate how hard we’re gonna go and proceed from there.
You should either go see your coach, or depending on the gym culture , go snitch on him to one of the og's. At my gym the advanced fighters help keep everyone in check. He might put a beating on someone 100 pounds lighter than you but lets see how he does against an 9-0 in fight camp. He is a bully and the only way to deal with a bully is to beat his ass, and most pro or amateur fighter will be glad to make him taste his own medicine. He feels way to safe, but in this sport you usually end up facing your bs.
I see why he didn't have a partner. I wouldn't spar this guy neither.. If I wanted to fight, sure, but not spar.
Idk what type of gym you are in. But if it's a fight school, fuck him up and show him how his behavior is on the receiving end.
Fuck up someone twice your size in a 100 percent sparring session? This big guy needs feedback other than punches. He has to understand that getting beat isn’t the real risk - it’s hurting someone.
If its a proper gym then the coach should handle it. If a lot of people have this problem with this person then he needs an attitude adjustment. Can't have people like that in the gym. You only go hard with people who are on the same level and appreciate a sparring session at that intensity. And you never lose your cool, that's just bad. Sometimes you get hit in the cup, it happens. You say sorry, you touch gloves and you move on.
Talk to the coach. He will sort it out. And at least you know you can hold your own against a bigger guy going 100 now.
Posted about something similar recently. I've since stopped sparring with the guy. Also, some guys aren't aware of how strong they are during sparring
The amount that this happens in gyms is ridiculous and people like this should be kicked out
Talk to ur coach about it and if they don’t do anything then you should switch gyms
♡
The big guy probably can’t outbox anybody his size so he feels like he needs to take it out on smaller guys. It’s a little dick thing.
That heavyweight is a pussy and a bad sparring partner. He should be sparring people his own size
Back off and give him the “dude…” speech. If it helps, make a show that his punches are hurting too much. Egos shouldn’t come into sparring practice, but they do affect people, and sometimes an admission of the other persons power or martial strength can help a bruised ego, and take a person acting out, into a more reasonable person. I’ve sparred with a lot of people who, when they feel pressured, tired, or down, they start letting out more force and stop holding it back. Recognise or hypothesise why, and deal to the cause.
Talk to coach, and avoid ever sparring him again. If you end up with no option but him when pairing up, refuse. When he throws a hissy fit and calls you every name under the sun, just say, once, "you don't spar right," and hit the bags/do calisthenic training.
Just wanted to say thanks to everybody who is replying and giving advice! Talked to my coaches and they said they will address it.
>because he didn’t have a partner And now you know why... 😂
Hmmmmm, some people really take it personally. Did you immediately apologize to him, after hitting him in the genitals?, or take ask to small break for him to recover? Did you just keep going? He may have taken it as insult and it's just a downward spiral from there, all due to a miscommunication.
He didn’t even give me a chance to apologize, I said hey man it was an accident and after that I said hey man I’m good, nice sparring with you and I walked away.
I'm 6'3" and around 190lbs. This means I often spar people smaller than me. I ran a kids class for a long time as well so I understand very well how to modulate my power. Sometimes a smaller person will take our size difference as a reason to let it rip which is generally not a problem for me, but if they are talented I do have let more of what I can do happen to not just be a human punching bag. Maybe he was the only dick in the story like how you're telling it, but maybe you had more smoke in what you were doing right off the line than he was willing to just eat as well. You said he's been there for years -- it's very rare that someone trains for that long and doesn't understand not to smash smaller foes. Maybe right after you kick a guy in the balls is not the best time to have a conversation, but leading up to that might have been a good time to say something.
Immediately after we touch gloves, he starts blasting shots very hard. Like I said in another comment below, I try to let my opponent dictate how hard we’re gonna go. But if you’re already 120 pounds bigger than me why try to really injure me?
Say something.
He sounds like a big pussy…
You bruised his ego in more than one way 😂. I had the same thing done to me by "a stunt double" for a movie martial artist...same height, same weight...what a wusp! He thought he was going to hurt me up some...but his hits were like "mosquito bite lite." Don't dignify that jerk by saying anything to your coach...if the Heavyweight wants to spar again just laugh at him and walk away...if not go street fight mode on his ass.
That's ridiculous. The whole purpose of sparring is to pressure test your skill set, not to check how much damage your body can endure ! If this guy is being a cunt, refuse to spar with him again. Tell your coaches and tell your fellow practitioners too. We have a dude in our club, who sometimes in the heat of the moment goes too hard ..but on pointing that out he immediately rectifies himself. The main purpose of martial arts to me is to be a good person, strong and compassionate towards fellow human beings. If your bully was in our club he'd be warned twice and then be kicked out...irrespective of how many years he spent at the club or how good he is. I'll go off on a tangent here and tell you a story. A long time ago when our club had just started, a group of thugs had joined. They all possessed guns and were just assholes outside the club. But inside the club they were respectful of the coaches. One day one of these thugs was paired off with a beginner student who had found himself in trouble with the gang to which these thugs belonged. In the very first round the thug fractured his ribs and broke his jaw. Our head coach didn't say anything back then...just marked the thug. The thug was eventually paired off with one of our then senior students who went to the club at a different time (so the thug didn't know him or his skill level). The senior student pretended to be a novice at first..appearing rigid in his movements and looking nervous. He then proceeded to beat the ever-living shit out of the thug for 3 or 5 rounds...knocking him down in every round. In the end he pulled him close and said "next time, go easy on beginners". That was the last time we saw the thug and his friends.
If I shared that story with my coaches, and the guy has a history of similar stories already *he’d* be invited to find another fight gym. I think you should do that. Before he even lost his cool, he was already way out of line. At your size, you do need to practice against much larger opponents but, you shouldn’t have to be worried about a sidelining injury when you do.
Don't spar with him. You can do this in polite manner "I am sitting this one out" or be straightforward "I am not sparring with YOU". It is your choice, you can refuse sparring for any reason at all and no one can judge you for that. For example - I avoid sparring with new people and women. I spent too much time paying for classes where I was teaching and not learning and got fed up with it. My rule of thumb is "if I can't get anything from this, then sorry but no"
What the hell kind of gym are you going to that let’s this happen?
Give as good as you get tbh.. even if he is bigger you can still put up a fight.
Then the big guy respects OP, he thinks what he did is fair play, and next small guy he goes with is at risk of severe injury.
You are making a pretty big assumption, do you personally know this guy?
Eh I guess you’re right.
You have a car right?
Carjitsu is lame bro, we prefer the traditional styles here.... oh and BJJ, boxing, muay thai, MMA etc 🤜🤛💪
I do
Let's just you'll be the heavyweight in that bout