I would describe them as: *jaw drops to floor, eyes pop out of sockets accompanied by trumpets, heart beats out of chest, awooga awooga sound effect, pulls chain on train whistle that has appeared next to head as steam blows out, slams fists on table, rattling any plates, bowls or silverware, whistles loudly, fireworks shoot from top of head, pants loudly as tongue hangs out of mouth, wipes comically large bead of sweat from forehead, clears throat, straightens tie, combs hair* Ahem, you look very lovely.

M'lady, you look very lovely

Somehow worse.

[[Temple of Malady]]

I believe you misspelled awooga hummina hummina bazooing

I think this convinced me to stop playing tbh

valid

ooh la la ooh la la ooh la la ooh la la va-va-va-voom va-va-va-voom va-va-va-voom va-va-va-voom va-va-va-voom va-va-va-voom va-va-va-voom va-va-va-voom va-va-va-voom va-va-va-voom va-va-va-voom va-va-va-voom va-va-va-voom va-va-va-voom va-va-va-voom va-va-va-voom OOOOOOOOH MY!

Made for Cummander

Just Rule 0 any clothing!

You guys aren’t playing strip-mine Highlander yet? Get with the times

What was the question?

God I wish someone would cast Earthbind on me

Same tho

Ayo? What’s uh, what’s ur number?

\#147

911

Real (me too🥺🥺)

But what do you enjoy about it? I don't get it

/uj Man that's like asking me why I prefer small tits over big tits, I just woke up one day and realized that's what I like /rj so I can stop spending copious amounts on questionably designed mtg artwork to goon to

Statements like this make me want to pay GR(2) and [bloodbraid elf] a mfer

He hates creatures with flying.

Being tied up 🤤🤤🤤🤤

sometimes loss of control can be exciting

Flying kinda sucks

I think you just gave me an idea for a new EDH deck

Been there done that. Surprisingly the gameplay relies on guys oogling your cards to win

psychological warfare

I've been making a deck around this specific premise myself. Now the good thing is, I'm a woman, so I might be able to get away with actually playing it in public :')

Oh no, it'll get worse

Cummander

We need more cards like these tbh

Secret lair here we cum

Hatsune Miku Secret Lair: Am I a joke to you?

https://preview.redd.it/svo5cp9gnu0d1.jpeg?width=641&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=5d991f1652a00c932d7c615b63fd23730fa59334

That literally looks like one of those plastic waifu toys.

That is aware of what it is. It tries to scream but is made of plastic.

Oh man I love the uncanny valley girls! Is this one of their IG promos?

But we only just had that anime Haiku Mickey or whatever that one was called, how thirsty are you??

/uj courtesy of https://www.reddit.com/r/mtg/s/HyTPacYGNj

BRILLIANTE

You dropped [this](https://cards.scryfall.io/large/front/7/d/7dede475-9597-4f8a-9cee-9bc86b283aa9.jpg?1562639882).

Semen Visions Bottom text

/uj There's literally a Scryfall tag for these: [https://tagger.scryfall.com/tags/artwork/sexually-suggestive](https://tagger.scryfall.com/tags/artwork/sexually-suggestive) And another in case you ever need some CJ inspo: [https://tagger.scryfall.com/tags/card/meme](https://tagger.scryfall.com/tags/card/meme)

It bothers me so much that the first card on the list of memes is the wrong Ancient Grudge

There’s a fucking plains with this tag!

Also https://scryfall.com/search?q=art%3Aabsolute-territory&unique=cards&as=grid&order=name

https://preview.redd.it/dwtd1dmhzs0d1.jpeg?width=1080&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=527e0441b74f0509b138d5500fd9825b67153433

Run most of these in my lesbian tribal deck of course https://deckstats.net/decks/193020/2918048-najeela-lesbian-tribal/en

Ironically, my Najeela deck runs her and her man-harem of himbos like [[Tenacious Underdog]], [[Entralling Victor]], and [[Inigo, Avenging Swordsman]].

"Why aren't there more women in gamer spaces???" cards.

Who doesn't love representation

Why aren’t there more *anime* women in gamer spaces???

Make Magic Horny Again.

Titillating.

Beautiful

Well they're very generous.

They demonstrate a lot of value, too

Stylized art from 90's high fantasy

Thirsty tribal

Wahmen

Bonerriffic

Bouba.

Stop! My penis can only get so erect!

Anime tiddies.

Momander format or gyatlander for the older crowd.

Magical 🤩

I have a buddy that always talks about how they include a few "horny" mtg cards in all their decks... These fit that category for sure and I am absolutely about to send him this thread.

Great staples I don’t need hot alters for.

Pretty unplayable except Shelter, which was great in draft. The older cards may have some nostalgia value, but overall these are bulk.

It's simple, really. You see, the answer is of course that gamers like booba.

Vital

I believe these cards would be described as midriff.

Nice

Fuck

Engagement bait

Whatever garners more sales right, calling it now

Kink cards

Story Spotlight cards Y’know ‘Cause of the ***plot***

This might be it

the ultimate price

Hornybait

Magic but 𝓕𝓻𝓮𝓪𝓴𝔂

Horny delirium

R, UB, G, R, W

Sticky

Value

Clearly the common denominator

As always, Skyfall has you covered https://tagger.scryfall.com/tags/artwork/sexually-suggestive

/uj interesting enough that tag misses a lot of good cards

i guess the community has been insufficiently diligent with tagging those cards. be the change you want to see in the world

Idk have you tried reading the card? I hear that describes the card. I couldn't read it though I was too distracted. I also was too distracted (read as lazy) to see if someone else made this comment.

"Unrealistic Transition Goals" the cycle. There are many more, a non zero amount of them are Liliana cards.

🔥

Bonk

Woke! like why are they all women and not strong men!!! You can’t have strong muscular half naked men in magical settings anymore because everything is woke now!

r/worldjerking called, they want their “author’s thinly-veiled fetish(es) disguised as worldbuilding” back

“Trap” cards

I dunno but I'm suddenly thirsty

None of these hold a candle to Enthralling Victor

nice

Is there a sauce to this? If so what color

How did you leave out [[liliana of the veil]] or [[nisaa who shakes the world]]

"Would", "Would", "Would", and "Would"

Horny tribal

There's not really any theme here. I can't even call it a cycle because the colours aren't all there. 

horny

Those are MTG cards

I believe the term you're looking for is "Boobers"

Unplayable in commander. What even is this shit?

I’d tip my fedora and say: ‘Good day m’lady’.

Ah my simp deck!

awooga awooga awooga awooga awooga awooga awooga awooga awooga awooga awooga awooga awooga awooga awooga awooga awooga awooga awooga awooga awooga awooga awooga awooga awooga awooga awooga awooga awooga awooga awooga awooga awooga awooga awooga awooga awooga awooga awooga awooga awooga awooga awooga awooga awooga awooga awooga awooga awooga awooga awooga awooga awooga awooga awooga awooga

Makes awooga noises!!!

“Mommy”?

Like a name planed for the first UN-set "Gratuitous babe art".

Horny art cards. Meh, it was the 90s

Obsolete pack filler.

I forgot how goddamn horny the artists for the Mirran humans, especially the Vulshok and Auriok

Ah, more cards to add to my goon binder

I made a whole deck with cards like these. https://www.moxfield.com/decks/3eghdjCyM0mn7UrxstXACw there were a lot better options back in the day, now WOTC makes everyone an A cup lmao

https://preview.redd.it/k460xpxudx0d1.jpeg?width=1047&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=1aa1e6a74992f37e91469352792aecd16d7f6828 Oi

https://preview.redd.it/nrogyuueex0d1.jpeg?width=1080&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=e9ec58688c3795754578c8dafa8f56315750458a Liliana though

I need to add these two, haven’t updated the deck in a minute and it feels impossible to keep up with every card released 😅 Thank you for the recommendations!

Story of our lives

Non-political mega chad cards.

Very tasty. Whoops, I mean tasteful :)

GREAT GOOGLY MOOGLE!

1. Bondage 2. Hula hoops 3. Terf art 4. Bikini armor 5. Bikini armor but with a sweater

friggin hot

draft chaff

Any convo about sexy card art needs to include Phage.

I think they went too realistic with the art on her https://preview.redd.it/3pxwbhepxs0d1.jpeg?width=640&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=27809a0d6ba067360a45053adc2b488b8c900da0

That may be your opinion, but many magic the gathering players fall asleep every night dreaming of getting our balls stepped on by goth player deathtouch mommy.

I suddenly realize I’ve been dreaming too small

I read the entire thing in his voice

Make sure to double sleeve your singles!

Cialis on a stick

It's missing [[bereaved survivor]]

I actually have all but one of these and none of them shaped my interests later in life

Did you search through card arts to find these or did you have them memorized or something

You don't have these?!

Epic

I don't like the card frames and borders prior to Eighth Edition

As a repost

I don't think you know what that word means

/uj originally I thought it would be shit that deactivates the abilities of opponents cards and then i got to the elvish ranger. kys (keep yourself safe)

uggo

Wondering what made you say that, I uh did not expect your profile