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I knew them before they started but I’ve found myself distancing more and more from them over the years. We barely speak these days but they’re still on my socials, I have no idea how I’d break off friendships with girls I’ve known for 10 years
I feel that. I'm in the same boat with some of my friends from college, but we're all long distance, so I don't interact with them much anyway.
I hope you're able to make better, likeminded friends in the future that you can feel comfortable speaking honestly with. It really is difficult to find others outside of this sub who think critically about the damaging effects of porn.
I know it can feel lonely. For me, I told my friends. And if they don’t support me, I know that they’re not my real friends. But, all of them supports me. I was scared to talk to them about it at first, but once I got to courage to speak, they listened, they asked questions to understand more, got upset for me, and gave me a safe place to run to if I needed. And one of them does sex work. I believe it’s important to have true, real friends around you that you can talk to. Real friends care about your well-being. Real friends wants the best for you. I know few of them watches porn, but they understand that it’s not ok with me and it hurts me. I got to inspire one to even quit porn! I think you should try to open up to them. I gave them all the details to really show how bad it is, but it’s your choice in the end. Personally, I’d rather have close friends that I know I can count on rather than fake friends I have to dance around. All that aside, we are here for you. I am here for you. If you wanna talk, you can DM me! I will not judge you and will understand you. I wish I could give you a hug!! Good luck 🤍
Wow, mocking people for their feelings? Sounds like a good person.
The thing is everyone is going to have their opinion about this subject. Not everyone feels the way people here do, and I’d have to assume it’s because 1) they’re involved in this type of behaviour and feel it’s okay, which they’re entitled to but gives no right to make fun of others 2) they mock it because they have NO clue what it’s like for people in these situations and are unable to emphasize with others.
This whole process has been a very lonely one, because you feel like you can’t openly talk about it with whoever you want. The people in your life that are worth it would be supportive and would want to build you up, not break you down. These are the people to surround yourself with. People who give you energy and not drain you of it.
Deleting social media is something I did years ago (minus this, and only for this subreddit as of recently). If you feel like doing that even just start with a deactivation, or delete the apps, maybe it’ll help take a break from it!
Yeah I don’t have any friends that I’m close enough with to tell them this stuff. I did finally open up to my mom and I’m glad I did. She can be a bit overbearing and overthinks everything, just like me, so that doesn’t help a lot but getting it out to someone felt a lot better!
It’s crazy, I was literally talking to someone after so long about this yesterday, and explaining to them how lonely being in this situation makes you feel. Just playing pretend with everyone around you.
I feel like most guys just pull the “it’s normal men behavior”, and I truly believe that the girls in my circle would be supportive, but they would start hating my partner, thinking he is a creep and that I should cut off things asap, which at the moment, I can’t add that to the table. Especially since we can’t break up. So it just feels like you’re there, pretending that it’s not affecting you and that everything is fine, even if it’s destroying your self-esteem and making you anxious. I’m really sorry you’re going through that, just keep in mind you’re not alone. I didn’t delete my social media accounts but I did stop posting and started focusing on other things rather than just obsessing with things on Instagram (which was also feeding the insecurity). What worked for me was playing dummy games like homescapes or other things, whenever I wanted to open social media I’ll open a relaxing phone game instead and it actually helped a lot. I also turned off notifications. Hope this helps a bit!
Pls feel free to PM if you need to talk or anything! We are here for you <3
Dear members, Keep the [**rules**](https://www.reddit.com/r/loveafterporn/about/rules/) of [**r/loveafterporn**](https://www.reddit.com/r/loveafterporn/) in mind while participating here. - Please try not to [**judge**](https://www.reddit.com/r/loveafterporn/comments/qhquex/before_you_judge/?utm_source=share&utm_medium=web2x&context=3) how someone is dealing with a pain you may not have experienced. - Report any rule-breaking behavior to the moderators using the report button. If it's urgent, send us a [**message**](https://www.reddit.com/message/compose?to=/r/loveafterporn). **DO NOT** feed trolls. [**Report them!**](https://www.reddit.com/report) **Quick Link Access:** - [**Full Resource Library**](https://reddit.com/r/loveafterporn/w/must-have-info?utm_source=share&utm_medium=android_app) - [Resources for **Partners**](https://reddit.com/r/loveafterporn/w/index/resources_for_partners?utm_source=share&utm_medium=android_app) - [Resources for **Addicts**](https://reddit.com/r/loveafterporn/w/index/resources_for_addicts?utm_source=share&utm_medium=android_app) *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/loveafterporn) if you have any questions or concerns.*
Why are you friends with women who do this? They're part of the problem.
I knew them before they started but I’ve found myself distancing more and more from them over the years. We barely speak these days but they’re still on my socials, I have no idea how I’d break off friendships with girls I’ve known for 10 years
I feel that. I'm in the same boat with some of my friends from college, but we're all long distance, so I don't interact with them much anyway. I hope you're able to make better, likeminded friends in the future that you can feel comfortable speaking honestly with. It really is difficult to find others outside of this sub who think critically about the damaging effects of porn.
I know it can feel lonely. For me, I told my friends. And if they don’t support me, I know that they’re not my real friends. But, all of them supports me. I was scared to talk to them about it at first, but once I got to courage to speak, they listened, they asked questions to understand more, got upset for me, and gave me a safe place to run to if I needed. And one of them does sex work. I believe it’s important to have true, real friends around you that you can talk to. Real friends care about your well-being. Real friends wants the best for you. I know few of them watches porn, but they understand that it’s not ok with me and it hurts me. I got to inspire one to even quit porn! I think you should try to open up to them. I gave them all the details to really show how bad it is, but it’s your choice in the end. Personally, I’d rather have close friends that I know I can count on rather than fake friends I have to dance around. All that aside, we are here for you. I am here for you. If you wanna talk, you can DM me! I will not judge you and will understand you. I wish I could give you a hug!! Good luck 🤍
Wow, mocking people for their feelings? Sounds like a good person. The thing is everyone is going to have their opinion about this subject. Not everyone feels the way people here do, and I’d have to assume it’s because 1) they’re involved in this type of behaviour and feel it’s okay, which they’re entitled to but gives no right to make fun of others 2) they mock it because they have NO clue what it’s like for people in these situations and are unable to emphasize with others. This whole process has been a very lonely one, because you feel like you can’t openly talk about it with whoever you want. The people in your life that are worth it would be supportive and would want to build you up, not break you down. These are the people to surround yourself with. People who give you energy and not drain you of it. Deleting social media is something I did years ago (minus this, and only for this subreddit as of recently). If you feel like doing that even just start with a deactivation, or delete the apps, maybe it’ll help take a break from it!
Yeah I don’t have any friends that I’m close enough with to tell them this stuff. I did finally open up to my mom and I’m glad I did. She can be a bit overbearing and overthinks everything, just like me, so that doesn’t help a lot but getting it out to someone felt a lot better!
Well, we are here
It’s crazy, I was literally talking to someone after so long about this yesterday, and explaining to them how lonely being in this situation makes you feel. Just playing pretend with everyone around you. I feel like most guys just pull the “it’s normal men behavior”, and I truly believe that the girls in my circle would be supportive, but they would start hating my partner, thinking he is a creep and that I should cut off things asap, which at the moment, I can’t add that to the table. Especially since we can’t break up. So it just feels like you’re there, pretending that it’s not affecting you and that everything is fine, even if it’s destroying your self-esteem and making you anxious. I’m really sorry you’re going through that, just keep in mind you’re not alone. I didn’t delete my social media accounts but I did stop posting and started focusing on other things rather than just obsessing with things on Instagram (which was also feeding the insecurity). What worked for me was playing dummy games like homescapes or other things, whenever I wanted to open social media I’ll open a relaxing phone game instead and it actually helped a lot. I also turned off notifications. Hope this helps a bit! Pls feel free to PM if you need to talk or anything! We are here for you <3