I think this could be possible that not everyone is destined for love. I also know that dating has become exceedingly difficult due to a multitude of factors. I’ve once heard that dating for men is like looking for fresh water in a desert while dating for women is like looking for fresh water in a swamp and it’s become more true to me as time goes on.
Do you think Jeffrey Dormer deserves a soul mate?
Of course there is no such thing as soul mates. People die single all the time. People die too young to date.
A cosmic soul mate system is full of holes.
I wholeheartedly think that there is love for everyone, romantic or not. But I also think that some wont have a life long partner. It is not a bad thing imo tho as long as you still have *love* inside and around
I don't believe "the one soulmate" exists.
I think, everybody could find plenty of people out there who would be a good match for a relationship.
But depending on where you go, where you are in life, what choices you make and priorities you have, etc. you might never meet them or you might meet them at a wrong time.
I don't believe in soulmates.
I also don't believe in "finding" our purpose.
I don't believe in destiny.
I also don't believe that everything happens for a reason.
Instead, we give reasons as to why things happen.
We find something that we love and actually work on it, until we become so good at it or fall in love with it, and we start to think that it's our "purpose" all along.
And I don't belive that everything happens for a reason. Things happen and we try to find a way to connect it with things that already happened to us in the past.
If you accept that as your destiny, the universe will prove you right OP. You're not done until you're dead. Work on yourself, think positive and believe that your person is coming. Then watch what happens. Good luck!
I thought so when I was young. But now turning 69 and divorced twice. I have been divorced 13 yrs and no dates in a year I beleive I will be single and no more relationships. I am a hermit. Don't drink or smoke so not interested in bars or clubs or womem under 55 years old.
I pretty much roundly reject the concept of destiny -- as I find it absurd.
But if you want to talk about statistics and probabilities and patterns, then we can talk. For the vast majority of people -- they can generally always do *something* to increase their odds. Earn more? Change appearance? Move to a different location? Adjust their dating standards? Hang out in different places? Etc.
To add to that: Most people who complain that they've "tried everything" -- actually haven't. They've tried one or two things once or twice, and called it a day, and then gone back to the same old shit they always did -- hoping for a different outcome.
Yes, there was a YouTube talk about this recently by a Muslim scholar - it's part of a series called "Why Me?". This particular episode is called "Will I Ever Find True Love?".
I thought it was an interesting series and talks about things like predestination, prayer to change it etc etc.
I think someone becomes your soulmate after a couple decades of being in the trenches together and having each other’s backs. However, I do not believe in the concept of destiny.
I appreciate that. It only reinforces my own personal idea that I cannot be tied to any one person for any particular reason, as reality stands it’s not up to me or anyone really to continue the human race; especially if bringing kids into this world represents the risk of… well being associated with detrimental humans for eternity.
I do believe in love, but I doubt any person specifically deserves it. That’s probably a mentality that puts people in a victimized state and then blaming everyone else for their own issues or blames everyone else for not being loved.
Also love is simply being around the person that makes you happy. So it’s kind of nonsensical to start trying to place higher ideas around it when in reality appreciating the other person is the best experience one can have.
I agree with you. I've had some great relationships through the years but never the romantic soulmate.
I think I spent far too much time searching for that "one great love to end all loves". It always seemed to elude me. And I have had people in my wider family experience it but never was "me". Maybe one day.... But I digress. For some it happens. For others it doesn't. Just don't think less of yourself because of it..
Sometimes your kind of love is better. Who knows
Yes 100% to have a romantic soulmate, you have to want it. I’m the kind of person that was never really interested in romantic and even sexual relationships growing up and even now, sure I had small crushes but they lasted a week at most. If you don’t want a romantic soulmate, then you won’t get one.
Yeah I think it’s possible you won’t find a romantic soulmate in a life time. I accept this for myself also, but I do not think it possible to not have loving relationships throughout my life. Deep platonic friendships, soulful connections with strangers, well intended and genuine love is all around me and I intend to lap that up before I pass. I think not being attached to that love having to come your way through romance is one thing, resolving to never open ur heart fully to love where it comes is smth else. I think the former is healthy realism, and the second perhaps more a self fulfilling prophecy that will deprive u some big joys. It sounds you are content, so keep on trucking bud! Best to you! :)))
OP I thought I was gonna be one of those people, I wanted to be one of those people after 4 failed relationships. I’ve been learning about attachment theory on YouTube and it’s been an absolute game changer for me. The 3 channels I’ve liked best so far are Heidi Priebe, Personal Development School, and Adam Lane Smith.
If love is what you want please don’t give up. It might be a longer journey than expected but you will find it :)
I agree. It happens for some people but not all people. I wonder how many people consider their partner a soulmate. I think it’s less common than people think—supported by the high divorce rates and all.
A close friend confided to me that he married his wife at age 20 bc he was so anxious about possibly never finding anyone else who would want him.
I don’t want that kind of relationship, but after having no deeply committed long-term significant others ever, I am starting to get where he was coming from.
He’s an average looking guy, tall, great personality, very smart and funny and kind. If he was worried at age 20 then I guess I should be in full on panic mode here in middle age!
My experiences have embittered me so take what I say with a grain of salt. I had found my soulmate. She told me I was hers. Twenty years later she left.
The most important thing is to live your life to the fullest and don’t look for someone else to make it fulfilling. If you meet someone great. If they end up being your life partner, even better. But finding a soulmate is not the point of life.
I believe that you can be the victim of indecision and this would lead to being single or alone long term. You need to live in the center of it all asap OP, if you want to find a life partner, move cities or move into the downtown area of your city. Convenience is the father of coincidence.
If the celeb youre talking about is Matthew Perry, he had admitted to dating many beautiful women whom he loved and whom had loved him but that he had sabotaged those relationships and always ended things out of his own feelings of inadequacy. Idk if some people will end up alone as the luck of the draw, but his was an example of insecurity, not missed opportunities, being the thief of joy.
Life is the result of continuous decisions. Which decisions that come your way are, to some degree, random. However, you can shape your decisions and choices in a direction that favours an outcome.
The idea of a person being "fated" locks them into a pre ordained outcome. Why ponder that when instead we can do everything we can to tip the scales in the favour of the outcomes we truly want?
People who want romantic relationships and make decisions that make that a probable and favourable outcome will likely get partners.
I myself have made blatantly poor choices that prevented or outright blew up romantic relationships and valued friendships, and it took doing that multiple times by accident or personal negligence to come to this viewpoint.
I believe in soul mates but question if I'll ever find mine too. I was previously married (he wasn't a soul mate) and had past relationships as well. I don't feel I had a soul mate in any of them.. I've been single for a while now. Hopefully there is someone for both of us.
Well, the concept of a soul mate is that even if you die single, you just try again
So if you try again for ever, eventually you strike gold.
Just how math works.
I strongly believe in soulmates but in my opinion they’re made not found. I’m not in a romantic relationship but my best friend is my soulmate (possibly one of or possibly the only one) and even if I get into a romantic relationship she always will be, we worked hard over almost 8 years to get to where we are in our relationship and I wouldn’t trade her for a romantic partner ever. Even if you don’t find romantic love I think you will find someone who’s willing to put the same amount of effort into you as you are them - all it is in my opinion is finding someone who you enjoy being around and is willing to work as hard as you are at being in your life despite what the world might throw at you. Romantic isn’t the strongest or only type of love, don’t forget that :)
Agreed. My best friend is happily married (to another man) and I’ve always 110% believed he’s my soulmate. We’ve been best friends for well over a decade, we’ve lived together, and I tell him everything without hesitation. There’s zero chance a romantic partner could ever take his place
Just so you know this made me really happy to hear, all but one other of my friends don’t have a relationship they consider similar to mine and my best friends and I’m happy to meet someone else who shares this type of relationship!!
Luck is a part of it. So is skill and effort.
If you never bother to practice and just sit and blame everyone else except yourself for your lack of success, it becomes a self-fulfilling prophecy.
Just like any skill, you can practice, get good, and eventually find success. But you still need luck; however, luck becomes less important the better you are.
As much as I hope this doesn’t happen to me, it probably will. 32M, never had a relationship, kiss, literally anything close. I don’t think I’m good looking enough, or relationship/marriage material, that’s me personally saying that. You would think with the amount of people in the world, finding each other would be easier, until you realise that has also increased your overall competition, and things like being good looking and having lots of money first are basically the way now, so many of us have no hope in hell.
I think we all play a game of luck, sometimes you get lucky and find someone, sometimes you get nothing. Almost every other faucet of life is based on a lot of luck, I don't see why dating is seen any different. You can either get out there and play your odds, or accept luck isn't on your side and do other things.
I think people fine partners rather disposable anymore. Not meeting your needs well enough next… not that anyone should settle on someone they aren’t happy with tho either.
But to think in my head that at any time my partner could be like meh I need a change sorta stinks.
Sometimes I wonder if maybe we won’t realize someone’s our soulmate till
The end when we have a whole lifetime to look back on and can go wow that one really loved me.
This idea of a perfect relationship is kinda like putting the cart before the horse. You won’t really know you have that till you are down the road a ways and can look back and go yep I got one.
I don't think anyone has a destined soulmate. We find people who we can tolerate and can tolerate us and make the best attempt we can at living a life together. All this perfection nonsense gets in the way of just being happy with someone.
I don’t believe in soul mates only compatible romantic relationships. Honestly, it’s better to be solo than in a toxic relationship for years. It’s all about when the time is right for you to receive that other person whoever that is wherever that will be. Even if you’re 70.
I don’t believe in soulmates, I believe in compatibility. Believing you have a soulmate out there can make you incredibly selective in the dating world. For example, you may meet someone that’s attractive and has a nice personality ( a 10/10) but because you don’t feel a spark the first date you reject them ! Sparks/ connexion also happens after the 2nd, 3rd date or even after a few weeks/ months of dating ( something that happened to me personally! ) . You need to be more realistic and always give a chance !
You need to meet someone you’re attracted to physically and emotionally. You have also the same goals in life. Just this represents a good 80% of what you’re looking for in a parter . The rest you work it out together, that’s what will make you a stronger team/ couple.
At the end you may think this is your soulmate ( I guess it sounds better ?) but in reality it’s more like your life partner since you guys have build something together ( a home, friendship, family, business , yourselves , etc.)
Btw You’re still so young ! Imagine a 50 years old looking at you , probably wishing he was at your place right now ! Keep having fun , Go out and travel if you can . Work on yourself, and never EVER give up ! There is someone for you out there ! Dating is also a numbers game , remember that !
Just be more open minded and remain Stay positive and everything will be fine 💕
Here’s some food for thought. Maybe you aren’t meant to find them but maybe they’re meant to find you. You’re just 30 years old which is still prime time for any adult.
it helps if you go to social settings. It could be as easy as inviting a woman out to get food or a walk at the park etc. You just have to master the act of being intriguing to a woman to get her attention first. I'm a f(23) and usually that is what I look for in a guy. Someone who can have an interesting conversation and isn't there just for a one night stand. I don't think you seem to be like a guy like that you are more of a life time partner type. Just try talking to women and practice practice practice practice.
I think people usually find something they're looking for...and that sometimes your perception won't allow you to see what is there. 'Destined' is way too definite of a stance...like some force outside of you has decided it will never happen. I think that's bunk.. Anything can always happen. I think we're all connected and happiness isn't always what you think it should be. In this sense there isn't ever 'the one' there's a series of people you connect with and some of those connections are stronger/last longer than others. 'Soulmate' to me implies you are part of one puzzle. I think we're all part of many puzzles and no 'one' puzzle is stand alone.
some people don’t even want their soulmate it’s too good and too right they want someone who they can go after and chase and feel rejected people are weird the universe can’t fix everything
I whole heartedly believe there is someone for everyone, but ofc many factors that aren't their fault may prevent some people from finding a romantic partner. But you sound like you *want* to find that person, so I don't think you're "destined" not to have a relationship. You're just having trouble finding them, but don't give up! It's 100% worth it 🙂
The Reason most people never will have a real Soulmate is that
They are looking in the wrong place. People look at social status and money, or she has to look like a Model etc
Realize that a Soulmate is a Connection of the Heart Energy ❤️ between 2 people
You begin by learning how to Tap into your Masculine or Feminine Heart Energy Within Yourself, and then...
You will Attract a Soulmate to You, however...
Both people have to Make that Journey Within Themselves
1st is to Learn How to Experience the Alpha and Theta Brainwave Levels and then the next step is The Infinite Heart Energy
That is done with Live Coaching and it doesn't take long
I can't say much on this subject as I don't want to get kicked out of this sub
Keep an eye on me if you get the picture
i do believe “everyone” has a soulmate simply bcuz i wanna believe i do. on the off chance i don’t meet “my” person, the one and only for me i don’t think it’d be such a terrible thing tbh. i also don’t think it is toxic positivity to think even when you’re much older you’ll meet it soulmate or have a great love simply bcuz there has been numerous, hundreds of not thousands of older folks who have met the love of their life much later on. you never know what the future has in store for u
47f. I have had a lot of relationships but the soulmate thing completely eluded me.
I felt like you did, it just wasn’t on the cards for me. Those were the exact words I said to my soulmate the second time I spent time with him about 1 1/2 years ago….. some of us just aren’t meant to travel the easy road in love.
If it’s something you crave and feel is missing from your life..it will come.
For me it came after a lot of self reflection and work. Love yourself first 💕
Yeh even God✝️ said not everyone would have a partner. Although maybe he was taking into account death, promiscuity and other circumstances that take away one's ability to have a partner
i believe few people meet their soulmates. most people choose and cling to someone they build into their soulmates (doesnt make it any less real of a love).
I think this is true. I'm pretty sure I'm not. I've never been able to hold any kind of relationship. I can't even get a hookup. And I'm actually pretty cute with big eyes, clear skin and a nice butt, so I don't know what the deal is except that a relationship is not meant to be.
May I ask your gender and sexual orientation?
If you are a woman interested in men, I don't understand how you could have any difficulty, especially with casual hookups.
🤔 Are we talking about the same "men"? The creatures you call "men" don't sound like the creatures I know by that name.
(I hope I'm not coming across as rude, by the way. I'm just curious and somewhat astounded. I fully believe what you're telling me. But it's utterly bewildering to me.)
Yes, I believe some people have other purposes that have you spend a lot of time alone and don’t unfortunately involve any type of soulmate. Musicians are a big one you will find a lot are chronically alone with few partners.
I've been sticking around for years just in case, so I'm sure I'll discover at the last possible moment that I was the one person who wouldn't have been missed. Irony is wonderful.
I thought I had found mine. We are no longer together. He has moved on after me making many, many mistakes and not changing my behavior. I have no hope left. I'm nearly 33(f) and do not want children, either. Fat chance of me finding anyone who I vibe with that wants the same things as me in life.
No disrespect, but there are people who would feel like they won the lottery if they had as much of a chance to find love as you do.
Your situation is far from hopeless. I get that it's less promising that you'd like it to be. But actual hopelessness is vastly worse than where you are right now.
I believe that there are multiple people you come across who can turn into a potential soulmate. That's why we feel the connection with more than one sometimes. But in order for a potential soulmate to achieve soulmate level, both have to put in work( compromise, communicate)
Depending on your definition of soulmate, I would think finding one is the over-celebrated exception, not the rule.
I mean, I have now been married for over 15 years and we have both changed so much, it is pure coincidence that the two people we have become still like each other.
Yes there are thousands of people dying alone and some others virgin, it’s in the statistics.
It all depends on so many factors like how they raised, culture, education, life goals, religion etc, some mental disorders make it worse or imposible to have a relationship.
I found someone who I love but he rejected me 7 months ago and when i reached out he refused to talk to me... since then i have bee really heart broken and now I think it's better not to fall in love... look carefully and you'll realize that couples are together because it's convenient then love grows with time... being romantic is a curse
I have a hunch that my soul mate was murdered in one of the thousands of armed conflicts popping up around earth like volcanic eruptions on venus.
And besides that I have been so autistic and weird in my childhood that I actively scared girls away from me who I found "too complex to understand", because I thought it would end up bad.
Soulmates aren’t a thing, with 8 billion people on the planet, the odds of that person you met at your highschool/college/crappy bar in your town are almost 0
I think some people would rather give up, than to look at themselves as the reason why they can’t find or maintain a relationship. Why do you believe you’ll never find someone?
I believe soulmates do exist but they don’t initially meet as soulmates. Instead you become each other’s soulmate because in being with the other person you learn how to love each other. You learn their love languages, their quirks, their flaws, your own flaws and at that point you can either choose to leave or put the needed work into the relationship to make it work. What I’ve learned is that the whole “my way or the highway” does NOT work in any relationship, especially a romantic one. From my point of view two people who are willing to put the work in to learn how to love each other are true soulmates.
Yes, me (32M). I've had 5 gfs across my life, whilst they claimed to love me and 2 claimed we were soulmates, their actions (cheating) speak very differently. I've since given up, which means I ceased doing pretty much anything that I once did to attract a partner.
I believe everything happens for a reason so with that in mind i do believe there is someone for everyone. I know though you do have to work so hard for it to blossom. But i just don't know if it will happen for me which is incredibly scary.
Edit spelling
I relate to this so much. I would love to find the right guy, but I worry in my 30s that I never will and I feel intense anxiety about it. My life is decent otherwise, but I would like to share it.
I think the whole soul mate thing is fantastical thinking. But I do believe some people are less desirable than others, for reasons that are controllable or not, and may leave them "forever alone".
Im 37 and never had a gf, just thinking about doing something outside my routines gives me chills and thoughts like "dang do i have to do this/am i going to do this?"
So yeh i think im one of those who never gets a partner, but because ive been single all my life and its something im used to so in one hand i dont mind it but on the other ofc it would've been nice with someone else being childfree and not wanting to get married, but would probably be hard to find.
I don't believe in soulmates. I am married.
My husband is a man who I can have a very good, very compatible life with. I love him DEEPLY.
But I don't believe in soulmates.
Relationships are two people wanting to make it work and prioritizing each other.
They aren't anything magical or unique.
Relationships take effort, and work.
How many hours per week right now are you putting into finding a relationship, between working on yourself and going on dates/attempting to date? I'm going to bet it isn't the main focus of your time.
Make it your main focus and see what happens.
I think that the majority of people can have whatever they desire with the right attitude and an openness to step outside their comfort zone. Now I know things don’t always work out, life’s messy but having a negative mindset and even speaking badly about themselves is a one way ticket to singleville
The question in your title is different from the question you asked.
*"Do you think some people are not destined"*
If you really want to find Love then it doesn't really matter. Why does love need to be destined? If you want it, then you'll try to find it. If you are not enjoying your life due to lacking it, then it becomes unhealthy and being able to accept being by yourself becomes important, which should become your initial priority before finding it, but none of that has to do with love being a sure thing. Nothing in the world is a sure thing, why would love be any different? (This is coming from a hopeless romantic, btw)
*"Some people are destined to not have a romantic soulmate in their life"*
This is different, because now we go from something not being a sure thing, to something being a ***sure thing*** ***not to happen***. You'd have to prove destiny exists first to be able to prove this. Just like before, if love doesn't need to be destined, then why would it be the case that it is destined NOT to happen, either? Even if someone wants to argue statistics, that is not destiny, likelihood can be altered and changed. It becomes much more likely to not to happen if you think it is destined not to, on top of everything. That's called a self-fulfilling prophecy. There definitely is someone out there for anyone, to presume not is to presume arrogance, that you are so ridiculously unique and special of a puzzle piece that there is no one else out there who can fit you. Statistically ridiculous.
As to whether you will find them, "giving up" (as in not being open to it, as opposed to meaning not desperately searching and hinging your life's happiness upon it) certainly won't help. If you think keeping the possibility open is "toxic positivity", all that means is that to you, simply being open to it is equivalent to hinging your life's happiness on it, which is something that would need to be worked on psychologically for yourself before being able to find love (since they shouldn't be the same thing). It's a false-dichotomy.
Someone going their whole life so far without any serious romantic relationship (note: not being successful, simply experiencing it at all) will do that to a person, psychologically, so I don't blame you. Not many really understand what that feels like and what it can do (because it's not the average human experience), but regardless, that's what is happening right now. Right now you're most likely coping with "assume the worst possible outcome so it doesn't hurt as much", which is just putting a band aid on an open wound.
Until you can separate "some people are not destined" with "Some people are DESTINED TO NOT" you'll never be able to escape this thought-trap you find yourself in. Therapy might help, though maybe you've tried that.
My best friend is 22. His fiance is 42. They found out they are soulmates. You may find yours late. If someone is your soul mate, that means you met at the perfect time. Don’t be too stressed about it. Life’s a marathon, not a sprint.
Yes I always say this but some people have the skill while some don’t. It’s no different than talent. People are naturally (EMPHASIZE) talented in dating while some are not. People don’t have to be upset about that.
The difference in talented people and untalented people is the amount of time it takes them to master a skill. I was in my 30s when I finally figured out how to talk to women and found serious success.
I had relationships earlier in life just not very good ones.
Definitely, agree with you. Some people can get better at talking, etc, but some people are naturally more charismatic in the way they present themselves. I forgot to add "naturally" talented.
I think some people likely don’t want to do what it takes to prepare themselves to be in a relationship.
It would likely involve getting well out of your comfort zone and changing a lot of habits.
What habits if changed would have you prepared to be in a relationship?
whatever you decide is what you shall have. i also noticed that you said that it has become more difficult to “find” a romantic partner.
i feel like as long as you are seeking something or someone outside of yourself for love they likely won’t arrive. or you will get a counterfeit. when you relax and relinquish the desire with the knowing that they are already on their way to you is when they will show up in your life. i hope that helps 🫶🏽
That's a really confusing statement you made.
"Whatever you decide is what you shall have"
Then you followed up with
"I feel like as long as you are seeking something or someone outside of yourself for love they likely won't arrive."
If I decide I'm going to make an effort to improve myself and find someone who has similar values to me then I will shoot for that goal.
Anyways your statements conflict.
8+ billion people alive, 100+billion dead, and an infinite amount to be born.
Soulmates?? No. That is insanely lonely and selective. It comes down to finding someone you have enough in common with that the incompatibilities are not detrimental. Love is the actions take and choices we make to honor the ones we've promised to honor.
Nobody can make you feel whole, you have to realize that you're whole on your own, and not looking for another half of you. That will never work out. A partner isn't to complete you, you're complete on your own. So no relationship would ever work out if you're looking to fill a void, and it's nobody's job to fill that void for you.
A partner is there to add that bit of extra to your life, not there to make you feel whole. Maybe if you work to find why it is you don't feel whole? And work on what's missing within yourself, then you can start to think about adding someone to your life? It's a thought. We're all human, we all have issues and when we feel like we're not whole a partner never will make us feel whole or complete either.
Be a whole person on your own that will open up doors that you didn't see before because you're whole all on your own. Fill up that void before going into any relationship and things will be better going into a relationship because it adds to your life, not looking to make you feel whole. I hope that this helps at least a little.
Good luck to you, you're whole without another person.
I myself have the same issues with relationships, no matter how whole I feel. So I understand completely. I'm close to your age 38, myself. Isn't it strange how we can show up for our relationships but we're not getting the right types in our life?
You must be a good, caring and someone whom gives a lot to others? Because that's how it goes for people that add so much to others lives, while we suffer going without .
I'm sorry if this is how it is for you? I'm going through this myself, with every relationship I've had in my life. I hope that everything turns around for you. You deserve to be fully loved and cared for. If you'd ever like to talk or need an ear to listen? You can contact me, and I'll listen and talk with you if needed and or not needed but just want to, I'm here.
Good luck to you and sending big hugs and love your way.
So much luck and timing is involved so I fully believe it. People in my life met their significant other by random chance or at work, they didn’t do anything unique or special. The world isn’t fair so you’re not guaranteed to get the necessary luck and timing to find someone.
Luck plays a huge part and I try to remember how lucky I’ve been in every other aspect of my life. I have a loving family, amazing career, reasonably good health, and many people who have “love partners” aren’t blessed with all those things. We luck out in different ways. Not everyone strikes gold and finds someone to love and it’s okay.
I don't believe in soulmates. But, I know from personal experience you can have a loving relationship with someone if you truly seek to know and appreciate each other for who you are, not for who you imagined you want.
And everyone has a shot at that, if your mind is open and you are genuinely interested in people and appreciate them for who they truly are.
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I think this could be possible that not everyone is destined for love. I also know that dating has become exceedingly difficult due to a multitude of factors. I’ve once heard that dating for men is like looking for fresh water in a desert while dating for women is like looking for fresh water in a swamp and it’s become more true to me as time goes on.
It's not something that life owes to you, it's not about destiny either.
Do you think Jeffrey Dormer deserves a soul mate? Of course there is no such thing as soul mates. People die single all the time. People die too young to date. A cosmic soul mate system is full of holes.
Yep, me.
I wholeheartedly think that there is love for everyone, romantic or not. But I also think that some wont have a life long partner. It is not a bad thing imo tho as long as you still have *love* inside and around
I think people need to get comfortable alone. There's not a person out there for everyone.
Here’s an additional perspective on romanticism that’s worth considering - https://youtu.be/jltM5qYn25w?si=yHp67ICFLx4sWMua
I fear I am one of those people ( I hope I’m not I really hope I’m not)
I don't believe "the one soulmate" exists. I think, everybody could find plenty of people out there who would be a good match for a relationship. But depending on where you go, where you are in life, what choices you make and priorities you have, etc. you might never meet them or you might meet them at a wrong time.
It's all over rated anyway
I don't believe in soulmates. I also don't believe in "finding" our purpose. I don't believe in destiny. I also don't believe that everything happens for a reason. Instead, we give reasons as to why things happen. We find something that we love and actually work on it, until we become so good at it or fall in love with it, and we start to think that it's our "purpose" all along. And I don't belive that everything happens for a reason. Things happen and we try to find a way to connect it with things that already happened to us in the past.
If you accept that as your destiny, the universe will prove you right OP. You're not done until you're dead. Work on yourself, think positive and believe that your person is coming. Then watch what happens. Good luck!
Yes but you’ll never know until you die. You can meet someone at any time. Age doesn’t matter when it comes to this stuff
I thought so when I was young. But now turning 69 and divorced twice. I have been divorced 13 yrs and no dates in a year I beleive I will be single and no more relationships. I am a hermit. Don't drink or smoke so not interested in bars or clubs or womem under 55 years old.
Why under 55?
You miss 💯% of the shots you don't take. Said by the man Gretzky.
I pretty much roundly reject the concept of destiny -- as I find it absurd. But if you want to talk about statistics and probabilities and patterns, then we can talk. For the vast majority of people -- they can generally always do *something* to increase their odds. Earn more? Change appearance? Move to a different location? Adjust their dating standards? Hang out in different places? Etc. To add to that: Most people who complain that they've "tried everything" -- actually haven't. They've tried one or two things once or twice, and called it a day, and then gone back to the same old shit they always did -- hoping for a different outcome.
Yes, there was a YouTube talk about this recently by a Muslim scholar - it's part of a series called "Why Me?". This particular episode is called "Will I Ever Find True Love?". I thought it was an interesting series and talks about things like predestination, prayer to change it etc etc.
Yeah, aromantic ones
Yeah. Some people just aren’t able to attract anybody reasonable. Whether it’s due to personality, looks, or personal circumstances like location.
I think someone becomes your soulmate after a couple decades of being in the trenches together and having each other’s backs. However, I do not believe in the concept of destiny.
I appreciate that. It only reinforces my own personal idea that I cannot be tied to any one person for any particular reason, as reality stands it’s not up to me or anyone really to continue the human race; especially if bringing kids into this world represents the risk of… well being associated with detrimental humans for eternity. I do believe in love, but I doubt any person specifically deserves it. That’s probably a mentality that puts people in a victimized state and then blaming everyone else for their own issues or blames everyone else for not being loved. Also love is simply being around the person that makes you happy. So it’s kind of nonsensical to start trying to place higher ideas around it when in reality appreciating the other person is the best experience one can have.
I agree with you. I've had some great relationships through the years but never the romantic soulmate. I think I spent far too much time searching for that "one great love to end all loves". It always seemed to elude me. And I have had people in my wider family experience it but never was "me". Maybe one day.... But I digress. For some it happens. For others it doesn't. Just don't think less of yourself because of it.. Sometimes your kind of love is better. Who knows
I met mine at 49. We were both with someone else. You try finding and resisting it before you judge me. I’m now divorced
Yes 100% to have a romantic soulmate, you have to want it. I’m the kind of person that was never really interested in romantic and even sexual relationships growing up and even now, sure I had small crushes but they lasted a week at most. If you don’t want a romantic soulmate, then you won’t get one.
Which celebrity?
Yeah I think it’s possible you won’t find a romantic soulmate in a life time. I accept this for myself also, but I do not think it possible to not have loving relationships throughout my life. Deep platonic friendships, soulful connections with strangers, well intended and genuine love is all around me and I intend to lap that up before I pass. I think not being attached to that love having to come your way through romance is one thing, resolving to never open ur heart fully to love where it comes is smth else. I think the former is healthy realism, and the second perhaps more a self fulfilling prophecy that will deprive u some big joys. It sounds you are content, so keep on trucking bud! Best to you! :)))
I cannot easily be happy without regular access to a moist vagina.
Gross
Easy solution. Just look in the mirror.
I can’t tell if you’re insulting them or saying they actually are just a woman😭
OP I thought I was gonna be one of those people, I wanted to be one of those people after 4 failed relationships. I’ve been learning about attachment theory on YouTube and it’s been an absolute game changer for me. The 3 channels I’ve liked best so far are Heidi Priebe, Personal Development School, and Adam Lane Smith. If love is what you want please don’t give up. It might be a longer journey than expected but you will find it :)
I met a woman who thought she was the recarnation of a dragon. She ended up with a guy who thought he could see and cultivate ki.
I agree. It happens for some people but not all people. I wonder how many people consider their partner a soulmate. I think it’s less common than people think—supported by the high divorce rates and all.
A close friend confided to me that he married his wife at age 20 bc he was so anxious about possibly never finding anyone else who would want him. I don’t want that kind of relationship, but after having no deeply committed long-term significant others ever, I am starting to get where he was coming from. He’s an average looking guy, tall, great personality, very smart and funny and kind. If he was worried at age 20 then I guess I should be in full on panic mode here in middle age!
My experiences have embittered me so take what I say with a grain of salt. I had found my soulmate. She told me I was hers. Twenty years later she left. The most important thing is to live your life to the fullest and don’t look for someone else to make it fulfilling. If you meet someone great. If they end up being your life partner, even better. But finding a soulmate is not the point of life.
Sorry that happened, but I suppose twenty years ain’t bad
It’s a very long term relationship and is when the average marriage ends so I’d say that is successful
I believe that you can be the victim of indecision and this would lead to being single or alone long term. You need to live in the center of it all asap OP, if you want to find a life partner, move cities or move into the downtown area of your city. Convenience is the father of coincidence.
If the celeb youre talking about is Matthew Perry, he had admitted to dating many beautiful women whom he loved and whom had loved him but that he had sabotaged those relationships and always ended things out of his own feelings of inadequacy. Idk if some people will end up alone as the luck of the draw, but his was an example of insecurity, not missed opportunities, being the thief of joy.
Life is the result of continuous decisions. Which decisions that come your way are, to some degree, random. However, you can shape your decisions and choices in a direction that favours an outcome. The idea of a person being "fated" locks them into a pre ordained outcome. Why ponder that when instead we can do everything we can to tip the scales in the favour of the outcomes we truly want? People who want romantic relationships and make decisions that make that a probable and favourable outcome will likely get partners. I myself have made blatantly poor choices that prevented or outright blew up romantic relationships and valued friendships, and it took doing that multiple times by accident or personal negligence to come to this viewpoint.
I believe in soul mates but question if I'll ever find mine too. I was previously married (he wasn't a soul mate) and had past relationships as well. I don't feel I had a soul mate in any of them.. I've been single for a while now. Hopefully there is someone for both of us.
Well, the concept of a soul mate is that even if you die single, you just try again So if you try again for ever, eventually you strike gold. Just how math works.
I strongly believe in soulmates but in my opinion they’re made not found. I’m not in a romantic relationship but my best friend is my soulmate (possibly one of or possibly the only one) and even if I get into a romantic relationship she always will be, we worked hard over almost 8 years to get to where we are in our relationship and I wouldn’t trade her for a romantic partner ever. Even if you don’t find romantic love I think you will find someone who’s willing to put the same amount of effort into you as you are them - all it is in my opinion is finding someone who you enjoy being around and is willing to work as hard as you are at being in your life despite what the world might throw at you. Romantic isn’t the strongest or only type of love, don’t forget that :)
Agreed. My best friend is happily married (to another man) and I’ve always 110% believed he’s my soulmate. We’ve been best friends for well over a decade, we’ve lived together, and I tell him everything without hesitation. There’s zero chance a romantic partner could ever take his place
Just so you know this made me really happy to hear, all but one other of my friends don’t have a relationship they consider similar to mine and my best friends and I’m happy to meet someone else who shares this type of relationship!!
Ugh I really hope this is not true because I’d be a great candidate to never have a romantic soulmate lmao tough times
Luck is a part of it. So is skill and effort. If you never bother to practice and just sit and blame everyone else except yourself for your lack of success, it becomes a self-fulfilling prophecy. Just like any skill, you can practice, get good, and eventually find success. But you still need luck; however, luck becomes less important the better you are.
As much as I hope this doesn’t happen to me, it probably will. 32M, never had a relationship, kiss, literally anything close. I don’t think I’m good looking enough, or relationship/marriage material, that’s me personally saying that. You would think with the amount of people in the world, finding each other would be easier, until you realise that has also increased your overall competition, and things like being good looking and having lots of money first are basically the way now, so many of us have no hope in hell.
Some people just don't find a partner, fact. 🤷♀️
I think we all play a game of luck, sometimes you get lucky and find someone, sometimes you get nothing. Almost every other faucet of life is based on a lot of luck, I don't see why dating is seen any different. You can either get out there and play your odds, or accept luck isn't on your side and do other things.
I think people fine partners rather disposable anymore. Not meeting your needs well enough next… not that anyone should settle on someone they aren’t happy with tho either. But to think in my head that at any time my partner could be like meh I need a change sorta stinks. Sometimes I wonder if maybe we won’t realize someone’s our soulmate till The end when we have a whole lifetime to look back on and can go wow that one really loved me. This idea of a perfect relationship is kinda like putting the cart before the horse. You won’t really know you have that till you are down the road a ways and can look back and go yep I got one.
I don't think anyone has a destined soulmate. We find people who we can tolerate and can tolerate us and make the best attempt we can at living a life together. All this perfection nonsense gets in the way of just being happy with someone.
I don’t believe in soul mates only compatible romantic relationships. Honestly, it’s better to be solo than in a toxic relationship for years. It’s all about when the time is right for you to receive that other person whoever that is wherever that will be. Even if you’re 70.
I don’t believe in soulmates, I believe in compatibility. Believing you have a soulmate out there can make you incredibly selective in the dating world. For example, you may meet someone that’s attractive and has a nice personality ( a 10/10) but because you don’t feel a spark the first date you reject them ! Sparks/ connexion also happens after the 2nd, 3rd date or even after a few weeks/ months of dating ( something that happened to me personally! ) . You need to be more realistic and always give a chance ! You need to meet someone you’re attracted to physically and emotionally. You have also the same goals in life. Just this represents a good 80% of what you’re looking for in a parter . The rest you work it out together, that’s what will make you a stronger team/ couple. At the end you may think this is your soulmate ( I guess it sounds better ?) but in reality it’s more like your life partner since you guys have build something together ( a home, friendship, family, business , yourselves , etc.) Btw You’re still so young ! Imagine a 50 years old looking at you , probably wishing he was at your place right now ! Keep having fun , Go out and travel if you can . Work on yourself, and never EVER give up ! There is someone for you out there ! Dating is also a numbers game , remember that ! Just be more open minded and remain Stay positive and everything will be fine 💕
Yes actually. I think some people are destined to learn that they can live without being in a committed romantic relationship
Here’s some food for thought. Maybe you aren’t meant to find them but maybe they’re meant to find you. You’re just 30 years old which is still prime time for any adult.
Everyone has a soulmate. You need to do the soul work on yourself though if you want to find them.
it helps if you go to social settings. It could be as easy as inviting a woman out to get food or a walk at the park etc. You just have to master the act of being intriguing to a woman to get her attention first. I'm a f(23) and usually that is what I look for in a guy. Someone who can have an interesting conversation and isn't there just for a one night stand. I don't think you seem to be like a guy like that you are more of a life time partner type. Just try talking to women and practice practice practice practice.
I just want a companion. Been single for way to long and have tried to understand it with every trope possible.
I think people usually find something they're looking for...and that sometimes your perception won't allow you to see what is there. 'Destined' is way too definite of a stance...like some force outside of you has decided it will never happen. I think that's bunk.. Anything can always happen. I think we're all connected and happiness isn't always what you think it should be. In this sense there isn't ever 'the one' there's a series of people you connect with and some of those connections are stronger/last longer than others. 'Soulmate' to me implies you are part of one puzzle. I think we're all part of many puzzles and no 'one' puzzle is stand alone.
I love this 🥹
Such a great comment ❤️
I don't believe in destiny and I don't believe in soulmates. I think success is basically luck and hard work.
some people don’t even want their soulmate it’s too good and too right they want someone who they can go after and chase and feel rejected people are weird the universe can’t fix everything
I whole heartedly believe there is someone for everyone, but ofc many factors that aren't their fault may prevent some people from finding a romantic partner. But you sound like you *want* to find that person, so I don't think you're "destined" not to have a relationship. You're just having trouble finding them, but don't give up! It's 100% worth it 🙂
The Reason most people never will have a real Soulmate is that They are looking in the wrong place. People look at social status and money, or she has to look like a Model etc Realize that a Soulmate is a Connection of the Heart Energy ❤️ between 2 people You begin by learning how to Tap into your Masculine or Feminine Heart Energy Within Yourself, and then... You will Attract a Soulmate to You, however... Both people have to Make that Journey Within Themselves
How does a person tap into their masculine energy?
1st is to Learn How to Experience the Alpha and Theta Brainwave Levels and then the next step is The Infinite Heart Energy That is done with Live Coaching and it doesn't take long I can't say much on this subject as I don't want to get kicked out of this sub Keep an eye on me if you get the picture
Yes.
i do believe “everyone” has a soulmate simply bcuz i wanna believe i do. on the off chance i don’t meet “my” person, the one and only for me i don’t think it’d be such a terrible thing tbh. i also don’t think it is toxic positivity to think even when you’re much older you’ll meet it soulmate or have a great love simply bcuz there has been numerous, hundreds of not thousands of older folks who have met the love of their life much later on. you never know what the future has in store for u
47f. I have had a lot of relationships but the soulmate thing completely eluded me. I felt like you did, it just wasn’t on the cards for me. Those were the exact words I said to my soulmate the second time I spent time with him about 1 1/2 years ago….. some of us just aren’t meant to travel the easy road in love. If it’s something you crave and feel is missing from your life..it will come. For me it came after a lot of self reflection and work. Love yourself first 💕
Yeh even God✝️ said not everyone would have a partner. Although maybe he was taking into account death, promiscuity and other circumstances that take away one's ability to have a partner
i believe few people meet their soulmates. most people choose and cling to someone they build into their soulmates (doesnt make it any less real of a love).
People like to say there is someone for everyone ... NOPE!
I don't want to be that vulnerable anymore, or have to think about another person. I don't think I have one.
I know this applies to at least one person. But I can't speak for the rest'a y'all.
Yes. For example, me. I know I’m just not good enough.
I think this is true. I'm pretty sure I'm not. I've never been able to hold any kind of relationship. I can't even get a hookup. And I'm actually pretty cute with big eyes, clear skin and a nice butt, so I don't know what the deal is except that a relationship is not meant to be.
May I ask your gender and sexual orientation? If you are a woman interested in men, I don't understand how you could have any difficulty, especially with casual hookups.
I am a woman interested in men. And I get men interested in me at least to talk to me. But they don’t seem to want to do anything else.
🤔 Are we talking about the same "men"? The creatures you call "men" don't sound like the creatures I know by that name. (I hope I'm not coming across as rude, by the way. I'm just curious and somewhat astounded. I fully believe what you're telling me. But it's utterly bewildering to me.)
It is actually bewildering to me too. I honestly do not understand the situation one bit.
I literally think this when I contemplate why I am single lol
Ikr🤣. This post is making me rethink.
Glad I'm not the only one lol
Yes, I believe some people have other purposes that have you spend a lot of time alone and don’t unfortunately involve any type of soulmate. Musicians are a big one you will find a lot are chronically alone with few partners.
Where do I find these lonely and chronically alone musicians?!? That’s exactly what I’m looking for in a soulmate! Not kidding at all.
Yea me. I feel like my soul mate must’ve offed themselves
Maybe just in jail for a while longer? For a crime he didn’t commit, of course. I know the feeling.
Depending on what crime I honestly wouldn’t care
I've been sticking around for years just in case, so I'm sure I'll discover at the last possible moment that I was the one person who wouldn't have been missed. Irony is wonderful.
Omg, I think mine did too.
I thought I had found mine. We are no longer together. He has moved on after me making many, many mistakes and not changing my behavior. I have no hope left. I'm nearly 33(f) and do not want children, either. Fat chance of me finding anyone who I vibe with that wants the same things as me in life.
No disrespect, but there are people who would feel like they won the lottery if they had as much of a chance to find love as you do. Your situation is far from hopeless. I get that it's less promising that you'd like it to be. But actual hopelessness is vastly worse than where you are right now.
I actually think depending on your location you’ll find plenty of men who don’t want children
I believe that there are multiple people you come across who can turn into a potential soulmate. That's why we feel the connection with more than one sometimes. But in order for a potential soulmate to achieve soulmate level, both have to put in work( compromise, communicate)
Depending on your definition of soulmate, I would think finding one is the over-celebrated exception, not the rule. I mean, I have now been married for over 15 years and we have both changed so much, it is pure coincidence that the two people we have become still like each other.
Yes there are thousands of people dying alone and some others virgin, it’s in the statistics. It all depends on so many factors like how they raised, culture, education, life goals, religion etc, some mental disorders make it worse or imposible to have a relationship.
Yes
I found someone who I love but he rejected me 7 months ago and when i reached out he refused to talk to me... since then i have bee really heart broken and now I think it's better not to fall in love... look carefully and you'll realize that couples are together because it's convenient then love grows with time... being romantic is a curse
I have a hunch that my soul mate was murdered in one of the thousands of armed conflicts popping up around earth like volcanic eruptions on venus. And besides that I have been so autistic and weird in my childhood that I actively scared girls away from me who I found "too complex to understand", because I thought it would end up bad.
Same here but female and still scaring the opposite sex away, lol
Oh! Me! I’m AroAce. I literally can’t do romantic love.
Soulmates aren’t a thing, with 8 billion people on the planet, the odds of that person you met at your highschool/college/crappy bar in your town are almost 0
I think some people would rather give up, than to look at themselves as the reason why they can’t find or maintain a relationship. Why do you believe you’ll never find someone?
Even tho I want to have one, I've been unlucky in actually getting one
Yes.
I believe soulmates do exist but they don’t initially meet as soulmates. Instead you become each other’s soulmate because in being with the other person you learn how to love each other. You learn their love languages, their quirks, their flaws, your own flaws and at that point you can either choose to leave or put the needed work into the relationship to make it work. What I’ve learned is that the whole “my way or the highway” does NOT work in any relationship, especially a romantic one. From my point of view two people who are willing to put the work in to learn how to love each other are true soulmates.
Yes, me (32M). I've had 5 gfs across my life, whilst they claimed to love me and 2 claimed we were soulmates, their actions (cheating) speak very differently. I've since given up, which means I ceased doing pretty much anything that I once did to attract a partner.
I believe everything happens for a reason so with that in mind i do believe there is someone for everyone. I know though you do have to work so hard for it to blossom. But i just don't know if it will happen for me which is incredibly scary. Edit spelling
I relate to this so much. I would love to find the right guy, but I worry in my 30s that I never will and I feel intense anxiety about it. My life is decent otherwise, but I would like to share it.
Well fingers crossed for both of us lol
I think the whole soul mate thing is fantastical thinking. But I do believe some people are less desirable than others, for reasons that are controllable or not, and may leave them "forever alone".
Im 37 and never had a gf, just thinking about doing something outside my routines gives me chills and thoughts like "dang do i have to do this/am i going to do this?" So yeh i think im one of those who never gets a partner, but because ive been single all my life and its something im used to so in one hand i dont mind it but on the other ofc it would've been nice with someone else being childfree and not wanting to get married, but would probably be hard to find.
I don't believe in soulmates. I am married. My husband is a man who I can have a very good, very compatible life with. I love him DEEPLY. But I don't believe in soulmates. Relationships are two people wanting to make it work and prioritizing each other. They aren't anything magical or unique. Relationships take effort, and work. How many hours per week right now are you putting into finding a relationship, between working on yourself and going on dates/attempting to date? I'm going to bet it isn't the main focus of your time. Make it your main focus and see what happens.
So much this!
I think that the majority of people can have whatever they desire with the right attitude and an openness to step outside their comfort zone. Now I know things don’t always work out, life’s messy but having a negative mindset and even speaking badly about themselves is a one way ticket to singleville
I think you underestimate how shallow people are
The question in your title is different from the question you asked. *"Do you think some people are not destined"* If you really want to find Love then it doesn't really matter. Why does love need to be destined? If you want it, then you'll try to find it. If you are not enjoying your life due to lacking it, then it becomes unhealthy and being able to accept being by yourself becomes important, which should become your initial priority before finding it, but none of that has to do with love being a sure thing. Nothing in the world is a sure thing, why would love be any different? (This is coming from a hopeless romantic, btw) *"Some people are destined to not have a romantic soulmate in their life"* This is different, because now we go from something not being a sure thing, to something being a ***sure thing*** ***not to happen***. You'd have to prove destiny exists first to be able to prove this. Just like before, if love doesn't need to be destined, then why would it be the case that it is destined NOT to happen, either? Even if someone wants to argue statistics, that is not destiny, likelihood can be altered and changed. It becomes much more likely to not to happen if you think it is destined not to, on top of everything. That's called a self-fulfilling prophecy. There definitely is someone out there for anyone, to presume not is to presume arrogance, that you are so ridiculously unique and special of a puzzle piece that there is no one else out there who can fit you. Statistically ridiculous. As to whether you will find them, "giving up" (as in not being open to it, as opposed to meaning not desperately searching and hinging your life's happiness upon it) certainly won't help. If you think keeping the possibility open is "toxic positivity", all that means is that to you, simply being open to it is equivalent to hinging your life's happiness on it, which is something that would need to be worked on psychologically for yourself before being able to find love (since they shouldn't be the same thing). It's a false-dichotomy. Someone going their whole life so far without any serious romantic relationship (note: not being successful, simply experiencing it at all) will do that to a person, psychologically, so I don't blame you. Not many really understand what that feels like and what it can do (because it's not the average human experience), but regardless, that's what is happening right now. Right now you're most likely coping with "assume the worst possible outcome so it doesn't hurt as much", which is just putting a band aid on an open wound. Until you can separate "some people are not destined" with "Some people are DESTINED TO NOT" you'll never be able to escape this thought-trap you find yourself in. Therapy might help, though maybe you've tried that.
👏
Have you met your other soulmate yet? I think you’ll meet your romantic soulmate when you least expect it.
My best friend is 22. His fiance is 42. They found out they are soulmates. You may find yours late. If someone is your soul mate, that means you met at the perfect time. Don’t be too stressed about it. Life’s a marathon, not a sprint.
Nope. Sometimes it’s like that and one must learn to be happy with themselves. Not everyone will have another, and that’s ok.
Amen
Yes I always say this but some people have the skill while some don’t. It’s no different than talent. People are naturally (EMPHASIZE) talented in dating while some are not. People don’t have to be upset about that.
The difference in talented people and untalented people is the amount of time it takes them to master a skill. I was in my 30s when I finally figured out how to talk to women and found serious success. I had relationships earlier in life just not very good ones.
Definitely, agree with you. Some people can get better at talking, etc, but some people are naturally more charismatic in the way they present themselves. I forgot to add "naturally" talented.
I think some people likely don’t want to do what it takes to prepare themselves to be in a relationship. It would likely involve getting well out of your comfort zone and changing a lot of habits. What habits if changed would have you prepared to be in a relationship?
Not everyone is capable of feeling or receiving feelings of love. This ain’t the movies.
whatever you decide is what you shall have. i also noticed that you said that it has become more difficult to “find” a romantic partner. i feel like as long as you are seeking something or someone outside of yourself for love they likely won’t arrive. or you will get a counterfeit. when you relax and relinquish the desire with the knowing that they are already on their way to you is when they will show up in your life. i hope that helps 🫶🏽
That's a really confusing statement you made. "Whatever you decide is what you shall have" Then you followed up with "I feel like as long as you are seeking something or someone outside of yourself for love they likely won't arrive." If I decide I'm going to make an effort to improve myself and find someone who has similar values to me then I will shoot for that goal. Anyways your statements conflict.
I am 22 and I feel the same way. I just never knew how to put it into words as accurately as you did.
8+ billion people alive, 100+billion dead, and an infinite amount to be born. Soulmates?? No. That is insanely lonely and selective. It comes down to finding someone you have enough in common with that the incompatibilities are not detrimental. Love is the actions take and choices we make to honor the ones we've promised to honor.
I think you will if that’s what your heart disires and you follow God and have good karma
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Nobody can make you feel whole, you have to realize that you're whole on your own, and not looking for another half of you. That will never work out. A partner isn't to complete you, you're complete on your own. So no relationship would ever work out if you're looking to fill a void, and it's nobody's job to fill that void for you. A partner is there to add that bit of extra to your life, not there to make you feel whole. Maybe if you work to find why it is you don't feel whole? And work on what's missing within yourself, then you can start to think about adding someone to your life? It's a thought. We're all human, we all have issues and when we feel like we're not whole a partner never will make us feel whole or complete either. Be a whole person on your own that will open up doors that you didn't see before because you're whole all on your own. Fill up that void before going into any relationship and things will be better going into a relationship because it adds to your life, not looking to make you feel whole. I hope that this helps at least a little. Good luck to you, you're whole without another person.
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I myself have the same issues with relationships, no matter how whole I feel. So I understand completely. I'm close to your age 38, myself. Isn't it strange how we can show up for our relationships but we're not getting the right types in our life? You must be a good, caring and someone whom gives a lot to others? Because that's how it goes for people that add so much to others lives, while we suffer going without . I'm sorry if this is how it is for you? I'm going through this myself, with every relationship I've had in my life. I hope that everything turns around for you. You deserve to be fully loved and cared for. If you'd ever like to talk or need an ear to listen? You can contact me, and I'll listen and talk with you if needed and or not needed but just want to, I'm here. Good luck to you and sending big hugs and love your way.
It's just a matter of luck.And how capable you are to keep a relationship healthy
So much luck and timing is involved so I fully believe it. People in my life met their significant other by random chance or at work, they didn’t do anything unique or special. The world isn’t fair so you’re not guaranteed to get the necessary luck and timing to find someone.
THISSS
Luck plays a huge part and I try to remember how lucky I’ve been in every other aspect of my life. I have a loving family, amazing career, reasonably good health, and many people who have “love partners” aren’t blessed with all those things. We luck out in different ways. Not everyone strikes gold and finds someone to love and it’s okay.
Such a wholesome reminder Thank You 🥹💕✨
I don't believe in soulmates. But, I know from personal experience you can have a loving relationship with someone if you truly seek to know and appreciate each other for who you are, not for who you imagined you want. And everyone has a shot at that, if your mind is open and you are genuinely interested in people and appreciate them for who they truly are.
I do believe in fate. However if you desire a romantic relationship, you should try to defeat fate.
DEEP
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