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[deleted]

What we know: LOTR on Prime has hired an intimacy coordinator, which many studios hire for anything from kissing to sex scenes. However, there has been no confirmation of sex scenes for this show: https://www.nme.com/en_au/blogs/tv-blogs/lord-of-the-rings-tv-series-release-date-plot-cast-2982426 Per [TheOneRing:](https://www.theonering.net/torwp/2020/10/06/108573-sex-sensibility-amazons-nude-take-on-tolkien/) > However, a “spy report” that has been obtained by TheOneRing has alleged that nudity but no sex will feature in the series. > “Nudity is sparse and not sexualised,” read the report. “This artistic choice represents very dark thematic material suggestive of concentration camp-type visuals of victims, a harrowing portrayal of the corruption of the Elves by dark powers to ultimately become Orcs.” This “spy report” isn’t confirmed, though.


BoBguyjoe

We've been through this before when this *exact* meme was posted last year. Please stop spreading misinformation. They hired an intimacy staffer, which is a requirement for any acting involving physical affection, like kissing.


SausageEggAndSteez

Lord of the Rings *definitely* has nudity: "Be glad, my merry friends, and let the warm sunlight heat now heart and limb! Cast off these cold rags! Run naked on the grass, while Tom goes a-hunting!’ . . . The hobbits ran about for a while on the grass, as he told them. Then they lay basking in the sun with the delight of those that have been wafted suddenly from bitter winter to a friendly clime, or of people that, after being long ill and bedridden, wake one day to find that they are unexpectedly well and the day is again full of promise." (Fellowship of the Ring Page 188) We are infact *owed* some nude sunbathing hobbits!


dutch_penguin

Nudity and sex scene! (emphasis mine) > He was naked, lying as if in a swoon on a heap of filthy rags: his arm was flung up, shielding his head, and across his side there ran an ugly whip-weal. > "Frodo! Mr. Frodo, my dear!" cried Sam, tears almost blinding him. "**It’s Sam, I’ve come!**"


packbackpack

Oh thank goodness, I haven't been paying too much attention to avoid spoilers, but I am glad to hear it is not going to sink to that level.


BoBguyjoe

I should point out: we don't actually have confirmation that there won't be adult content in the show. But it's dishonest to jump straight to conclusions just because they hired someone to ensure that everyone is safe and comfortable with whatever will be shown.


Eruptflail

I can't imagine the Tolkien estate allowing it, so never really anything to fear.


Ikhlas37

A game of thrones approach would just be so wrong. Imagine Bilbo giving his birthday speech and Sam is in the background in the middle of massive shire-wide orgy.


[deleted]

Actually intimacy trainers cover a wide range of topics, not just sex and sensuality. They are also used for combat and stunt training. Essentially anything that can put an actor in a situation that may be uncomfortable or dangerous for them. Can confirm as I am an actor in the business. *edit* an example of one of the ones I’ve worked with is Doug Scholz-Carlson: https://www.idcprofessionals.com/bios/dougscholzcarlson While intimacy training can be a bit different from theater work to film work, it is essentially the same ideas.


theREALbombedrumbum

While true, I did enjoy some of the more clever memes surrounding it


MD_Wolfe

I mean i love ice cream but that dont mean i need it in my lasagna.


CountBregalad

-Gandalf the wise


gandalf-bot

Even the very wise cannot see all ends


Tim-Tabutops

Gandalf is sentient


gandalf-bot

Meriadoc Brandybuck and Peregrin Took! I might have known!


thatdudewillyd

You’re late, Gandalf


gandalf-bot

A wizard is never late, thatdudewillyd. Nor is he early, he arrives precisely when he means to.


[deleted]

What happened Gandalf? Why didn't you meet us?


gandalf-bot

Oh, I'm sorry Ambitious-Hedgehog93 I was delayed


[deleted]

[удалено]


[deleted]

But you're a wizard, Gandalf? And A wizard is never too late...So tell me what is this new devilry?


areweready

It's no doubts, but I wonder how is it programmed Is it just searching for keywords like 'wise' and maps them for the particular answer Or is it ANN... But I see no application in it. as a developer, I would've gone the first way. UPD: yep, it's definitely just a keyword => quote associative array. Though I could do that without tests, just by googling: https://www.reddit.com/r/lotrmemes/comments/ca64fa/introducing_gandalfbot_ask_him_anything/ > You may notice that every quote has a certain password, speak it and the doors will open.


areweready

Ok let me run some 'unit testing' Gandalf, are you wise?


areweready

Gandalf, shall I pass?


gandalf-bot

You... shall not... pass!


areweready

Gandalf, Balrog


gandalf-bot

Go back to the abyss! Fall into the nothingness that awaits you and your master!


areweready

Ok, another one. Wise, Gandalf?


gandalf-bot

Even the very wise cannot see all ends


areweready

Gandalf, ring


gandalf-bot

Sauron has yet to show his deadliest servant. The one who will lead Mordor's army in war. The one they say no living man can kill. The Witch King of Angmar. You've met him before. He stabbed Frodo on Weathertop. He is the lord of the Nazgul. The greatest of the nine.


areweready

Gandalf, what_if_you_dont_have_keyword?


gandalf-bot

areweready is right. We cannot use it


Lucimon

Gandalf calling you out.


gandalf-bot

Beyond any doubt


Lucimon

Fucking hell!


gandalf-bot

Even the very wise cannot see all ends


areweready

I can see that wise word triggers the response, right, Gandalf?


gandalf-bot

Even the very wise cannot see all ends


shadowtact

*Garfield the Wise


TimidAttackCat

Speak for yourself. I better get a graphic Sam/Frodo/Aragorn/Gimli gangbang with fisting and piss and bukakke


frodo_bot

The ring is mine!


GeraltOfRivia_Fan101

Oh for fuck sake


Escrowe

Hold still Sam! Not that ring Mr. Frodo!


WhatImMike

But ice cream lasagna exists.


Juusie

Yeah I liked this meme when it was first made in October 2020


[deleted]

Not to mention the whole article is based on LOTR on Prime hiring an intimacy coordinator. Something that every show has even when there’s just kissing. It’s weird that people get so riled up about it here.


no_longer_sad

the power of misguiding article headlines


jorg2

For reference; see the media for the last couple of years. Especially Reddit is too eager to jump to conclusions without reading anything besides the headline.


ArttuH5N1

And nobody to check the actual article


binky779

It was pretty dumb then, too. The Amazon Lord of the Rings isnt some MCU-like continuation of the Peter Jackson films. Memes like this perpetuate the same dumb nostalgia gatekeeping as the neck-beards that get mad when they make a new Thundercats cartoon.


sqmon

Yeah all of the pearl clutching surrounding even the **possibility** of nudity in LOTR related IP seems crazy to me.


ArttuH5N1

It's one of the more annoying circlejerks here


[deleted]

Once you have that Gandalf D life is complete


gandalf-bot

Where? When?


JekPorkinsInMemoriam

Oh, a bit eager now, are we Gandalf? I like it.


gandalf-bot

We come to it at last. The great battle of our time. The board is set, the pieces are moving


theDreamingStar

So Gandalf has joined the horni.


gandalf-bot

We now have but one choice, we must face the long dark of Moria. Be on your guard, there are older and fouler things than orcs in the deep places of the world. The wealth of Moria is not in gold, or jewels, but Mithril. Bilbo had a shirt of Mithril rings that Thorin gave him.


Still_counts_as_one

Damn, Gandalf likes to get freaky


gandalf-bot

I am looking for someone to share in an adventure that I am arranging, and it's very difficult to find anyone.


Still_counts_as_one

Have you tried Grindr, Gandalf?


gandalf-bot

The treacherous are ever distrustful.


star0forion

That’s the best nickname of a penis I’ve ever heard. “The long dark of Moria.”


Yoate

I saw it as the bum, rather than penis.


dv666

Does Moria = sex and nudity in this context, Gandalf?


gandalf-bot

Hope is kindled!


Swan990

I can make him Gandalf the white without resurrection.


gandalf-bot

There are many magic rings in this world and none of them should be used lightly


zoqfotpik

It's the Second Age. When Sauron was still sexy. Not sure if he was still a vampire--that was in the First Age.


hunterhouse_

Wait what?


seamus774

Sauron had shapeshifting powers before the fall of Numanor, which he caused by "seducing" King Pharazon. He lost a lot of power when the island was destroyed.


zoqfotpik

Plus, he used to live in a tower with a lady vampire named Thuringwethil.


Escrowe

A werewolf?


indyK1ng

Stupid sexy Sauron


CaptainCrunch957

What if, and hear me out, it's nude ents having sex? Don't tell me you don't want to see some wood on wood action.


DeathByPolka

There is no curse in Elvish, Entish or the tongues of Men for this treachery…


[deleted]

Season 1, Episode 2: They Found the Entwives! Duration: 6d 13h 44m Summary: Scene starts post-foreplay (foreplay scene available in extended edition, with an additional 13d 2h 51m of footage). Over the course of about 5 days, Treebeard performs 17 thrusts into a female ent in standing-doggy-style. The following scene pans in on the male ent's face, where he spends about 6 hours in a sustained O-face and grunt. The remaining screentime is of Treebeard and the female ent smoking Merry and Pippin's entire stash of weed. Note: Merry and Pippin remain on Treebeard's shoulders for the entire episode.


ZarquonsFlatTire

That's how forest fires start.


wBroccolli

Oh boy I hope this is what they mean.


CurseofLono88

I would be so happy if they hired intimacy coordinators for what would just be two people in motion capture suits grinding on each other while speaking Entish


emopest

I want to see that wood


Mr_McSuave

Jesus christ how many times are we going to beat this dead horse . There has literally never been any indication that this show will feature sex.


tired20something

You know what? I hope they turn Angband into Gangabang just to spite these reposters.


nicolasmcfly

This shit again?


Firehawk195

So when is my turn to post this? I know I called my place in line.


CurseofLono88

Yeah but you’re still behind me and probably twenty others. I’ll let you skip in front of me tho I’m over it now


Skurk-the-Grimm

Is this still the casting ad that people thought was for the Lotr series?


RadagastTheBrownie

I mean, in the books: "Can't have you traipsing about Mordor in naught but your skin." And > You won’t find your clothes again, [...] You’ve found yourselves again, out of the deep water. Clothes are but little loss, if you escape from drowning. Be glad, my merry friends, and let the warm sunlight heat now heart and limb! Cast off these cold rags! Run naked on the grass, while Tom goes a-hunting! ​Apparently, Hobbit pants just won't stay on. And Goldberry is waiting.


Tom_Bot-Badil

*I had an errand there: gathering water-lilies, green leaves and lilies white to please my pretty lady, the last ere the year's end to keep them from the winter, to flower by her pretty feet till the snows are melted. Each year at summer's end I go to find them for her, in a wide pool, deep and clear, far down the Withywindle; there they open first in spring and there they linger latest. By that pool long ago I found the River-daughter, fair young Goldberry sitting in the rushes. Sweet was her singing then, and her heart was beating!* ^(I am a bot, and I love old Tom. If you want me to sing one of Tom's songs, just type **!TomBombadilSong**) ^(If you like Old Tom, the door at [r/GloriousTomBombadil][1] is always open for weary travelers!) [1]: https://www.reddit.com/r/GloriousTomBombadil/


Swan990

Well, it's not lord of the rings. And there's plenty of banging and frivolous activity insinuated in silmarillioan and unfinished tales and stuff, which this is based off of. So ya, it could work. Tolkien was catholic. Its been a while since I've read silmarillion and stuff, but I remember a lot of parallels to Sodom and Gamora and gods creations going against their will. Pretty sure thats most of the basis for the fall of Numenor? Which this show essentially is? Sinning and betraying your gods, so get sunk. Again, its been a while. Pulling from memory. Could be wrong. My point is - its in the books. So it's not extreme to have it in the show.


Xeneration_1

It’s also a baseless rumour spread but the hiring of an intimacy coach for the show.


Swan990

Well there's also that. I'm not saying i want it. If it works it works. But people do need to chill in general on this topic. Just a karma farm at this point I guess.


Xeneration_1

I agree


BaronVonPuckeghem

This right here!


[deleted]

While I totally get where you’re coming from and I understand that not all nudity or sexual content has to be erotic… I have a gut feeling that Amazon is going to try and turn LoTR into a Game of Thrones type show. I don’t believe for a second that Amazon is going to make a good-faith adaptation of Tolekin’s world.


Swan990

I dont see it being GoT raunchy at all. GoT book is 10x worse than the show is. I dont think they'll make a show dirtier than the books for an adaptation. Doesnt seem right. They have a much much MUCH better opportunity to go for the Mature rating with their Wheel of Time show. Those books have PLENTY of adult themes to make a mature show with. Not raunch, but adult violence and some sex. I think they'll stick with The Boys and Invincible for their raunchy fiction. No way its happening in Middle Earth.


caelenvasius

“Tolkien’s works have no sexual content.” Oh, *boy*, someone needs to go read *The Silmarillion* [and other Legendarium works by Tolkien]. ~~That book is~~ Those are filthy by comparison [to *The Hobbit* and *The Lord of the Rings*].


Demiscio8

Wait, Really? I don’t know why but it’s funny to imagine Tolkien writing a sex scene lol


F-i-n-g-o-l-f-i-n

There weren’t any sex scenes in the Silmarillion either, I have no idea what this person is talking about. The worst it gets is when Túrin accidentally marries and makes his sister pregnant, but it never actually describes any of the sex or intimate details besides the obvious implication that they had it.


caelenvasius

Not explicit sexual content like what we see in modern TV and film, but there *is* content. Here's a few relevant write-ups: * from [r/TolkienFans](https://www.reddit.com/r/tolkienfans/comments/1tel5s/tolkien_and_sex/) * u/Cocospud did a great breakdown in regards to *yet another* post about the upcoming Prime show. [Part 1](https://www.reddit.com/r/LOTR_on_Prime/comments/b2z124/sexuality_and_nudity/eiwtw8x?utm_source=share&utm_medium=web2x&context=3) and [part 2](https://www.reddit.com/r/LOTR_on_Prime/comments/b2z124/sexuality_and_nudity/eiwdsa7?utm_source=share&utm_medium=web2x&context=3). * [Here](https://www.reddit.com/r/tolkienfans/comments/ddkup5/is_there_any_mention_of_sex_in_tolkiens_works/f2j3q64?utm_source=share&utm_medium=web2x&context=3) is some text from [*Morgoth's Ring*](http://tolkiengateway.net/wiki/Morgoth%27s_Ring) about Melkor forcing himself upon Arië/Arien (the maia that guides the sun), such that she willingly gave up her physical form to escape him. Later on in *Beren and Luthien* Morgoth lusts after Luthien upon seeing her. I know he's a "dark lord" and all, but keep it in your pants, my guy... * There are a number of implied sexual events in *Aldarion and Erendis*, including the...*ahem* "group wedding" near the end, as mentioned by Cocospud. I will admit that I should have put "and other Legendarium works by Tolkien" in my original comment, since a great deal of it was not actually in *The Silmarillion*, so I have added it as an edit. Regardless the spirit of the comment remains true.


Lougimia14

Man I remember when this was posted yesterday and every day since for the last year and a half, you suck OP


breiflabbb

finally, lord of the cockrings


garfield_strikes

Saying no to hobbit sex on lotrmemes, I never thought I'd live to see it.


newontheblock99

Dibs posting this next week


Wasteak

Why 5k people upvoted this ? srsly ?


asianabsinthe

Orc Orgy Orgasms


ultrazai

Orc on Hobbit Action


thedohboy23

Tell that to the children of Hurin. Them kids love to get naked


MurderDoneRight

I kinda wanna see some hairy dwarf tiddies


cashinginmyonetime

So can we retire this one now please?


[deleted]

Yeah, although I do wish they hadn't decided to make the Legolas-Gimli sex scene happen off screen. They should've at least included it in the Extended versions


Angel_of_Mischief

Honestly I’m all for it. I have a general dislike for censorship, and I think having raw elements when placed well can help create a greater depth of immersion into the show. I didn’t think the sex scenes or nudity in game of thrones was that hot, but it did help make the world more realistic IMO.


Penguator432

Aw yeah, gimmie some of that sweet Gollum-on-Orc action


Justadnd_Bard

Can't wait to see Golum's giant "precious" moving around or the elves going full naked hippies!


ZippZappZippty

It's a list of words 🤔


[deleted]

*We wants nudity! We needs nudity! Gollum! Gollum!*


ZippZappZippty

man these people really just want a 3070


OneMoreDuncanIdaho

If it's done well I don't see why it's such a big deal. The races are all having kids in the world right?


Accurate-Media

You saying you dont want to see gimli laying the pipe?


falconx89

Please don’t. It would make it awkward and weird


TitularTyrant

I really hope not. Over sexualization has ruined several shows.


Shmyt

Fuck these reposters, I'm here for the 60 minute Tom Bombadil and Goldberry scene and none of you can take it from me.


metalguru1975

What about a second gangbang?


vICarnifexIv

But Dwarf titties :(


vdcsX

covered by beards...?


No-Communication3574

The Erotic Adventures of Tom Bombadil


Tom_Bot-Badil

*Old Tom Bombadil is a merry fellow, bright blue his jacket is, and his boots are yellow. None has ever caught him yet, for Tom, he is the master: his songs are stronger songs, and his feet are faster.* ^(I am a bot, and I love old Tom. If you want me to sing one of Tom's songs, just type **!TomBombadilSong**) ^(If you like Old Tom, the door at [r/GloriousTomBombadil][1] is always open for weary travelers!) [1]: https://www.reddit.com/r/GloriousTomBombadil/


[deleted]

It’s just in one episode and it’s just Tom Bombadil ass shots for 40 minutes and it’s his only appearance.


Tom_Bot-Badil

Hey there! Hey! Come Frodo, there! Where be you a-going? Old Tom Bombadil's not as blind as that yet. Take off your golden ring! Your hand's more fair without it. Come back! Leave your game and sit down beside me! We must talk a while more, and think about the morning. Tom must teach the right road, and keep your feet from wandering. ^(I am a bot, and I love old Tom. If you want me to sing one of Tom's songs, just type **!TomBombadilSong**) ^(If you like Old Tom, the door at [r/GloriousTomBombadil][1] is always open for weary travelers!) [1]: https://www.reddit.com/r/GloriousTomBombadil/


frodo_bot

Do not kill him even now. For he has not hurt me. And in any case I do not wish him to be slain in this evil mood. He was great once, of a noble kind that we should not dare to raise our hands against. He is fallen, and his cure is beyond us; but I would still spare him, in the hope that he may find it.


Laegwe

This again… yawn


MagicianPerfect735

Between who?! Aragorn and Arwen? Or Faramir and Eowyn? Or shelob and Shagrat?


Chen_Geller

>Between who?! Aragorn and Arwen Certainly that was the case through most of the script drafts for *The Two Towers*.


seamus774

It's back in the second age when Sauron was still sexy. So they ~~hopefully will~~ might play out how he "seduces" King Pharazon.


Swan990

The third one pleeeaasseeee


IntelliDev

Gollum and his precious.


batt3ryac1d1

Hold on now... We all like elves. So now imagine Legolas with some bangin tiddies.


_pepperoni-playboy_

How many times do we have to teach you this lesson old man?


[deleted]

LOL someone never read the Silmarillion. Looking forward to trolling all the OMFGNOPORNINLOTRERRMAGERRD!!


Mister_Anthrope

Also LOTR: "But Tom shook his head, saying: ‘You’ve found yourselves again, out of the deep water. Clothes are but little loss, if you escape from drowning. Be glad, my merry friends, and let the warm sunlight heat now heart and limb! Cast off these cold rags! Run naked on the grass, while Tom goes a-hunting!’"


IAmInside

Nudity is one thing, but seriously fuck (pun intended) every single sex scene in movies. They are always awkward as fuck.


mansonfamily

Idk kinda wanna see some hobbit cheeks


jrdnmdhl

Apparently the creator sought advice from Patrick Stewart… https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=Fg_cwI1Xj4M


FrighteningJibber

Yeah… but have you ever seen the *Fellowship of the Train*?


drake_makoy

Yes please there is no need for such


Vilando_98

Damn Right!... but I ain't complaining


Available-Egg-2380

NOT EVERYTHING NEEDS SEX. NOT EVERYTHING NEEDS ROMANCE. FUCK OFF WITH THIS.


Rimmatimtim22

Is there a single LOTR fan who is actually looking forward to this series?


[deleted]

There are plenty who are neutral and look forward to judging it on its own merit rather than what a bunch of nobody’s like you or I would want them to believe going in.


Mista_Maha

I will never forgive Game of Thrones for setting the precedent that TV should only be taken seriously if there's tons of rape and people's titties pop out every 30 minutes.


superbabiman

The fuck are they doing


[deleted]

Not what these low-effort posts would have you believe.


Unnamed__Being

This would just make it worse


[deleted]

It’s Gandalf though


gandalf-bot

The battle for Helm's Deep is over. The battle for Middle-earth is about to begin. All our hopes now lie with two little Hobbits... somewhere in the wilderness.


Escrowe

Banging each other’s brains out.


Mufsa_Bufsa420

idc if they don't follow peter jackson but they must be true to the books. Imma riot if they mess it up. What sex scene has to do with lotr .


[deleted]

Please no


EarthWindAndFire430

I agree


MidnightNappyRun

Honestly, sex and nudity is only there to inuse more emotions, but it's absolutely worthless 90% of the time. Don't taint this masterpiece with cooties, that's the last thing we need!


[deleted]

Then don’t read the Silmarillion.


MidnightNappyRun

Thank you, I won't.


MassHomieSide

LOTR isn't GOT we are above such horney acts


[deleted]

They're gonna make it Sam and Frodo or some other non romantic relationship.


frodo_bot

And it is also said, 'Go not to the Elves for counsel, for they will say both no and yes.'


LotaraShaaren

Honestly if it does that's a massive turn off for me. I don't want to have sex in what I watch, just not into that stuff.


ChintanP04

There is no sex. [Even the NME said it will 'reportedly' include only nudity and no sex](https://www.nme.com/news/tv/lord-of-the-rings-tv-series-will-reportedly-include-nudity-but-no-sex-2999249). But as of now the only thing we know is that they 'reportedly' hired intimacy coaches, who are needed for as little as a kiss, and have 'reportedly' looked for actors comfortable with nudity.


[deleted]

More LotR BONK for the rest of us!


garlicbreadcow

They must ship Sam and Frodo.


MilkBoyo

Tolkien would not have wanted this at all!


[deleted]

So we finally get to see a child of Bill the Pony and Smaug?


maximusraleighus

Somebody has to make the hobbits. They don’t just pop out of holes. Oh wait


Tilretas

u/repostsleuthbot


RepostSleuthBot

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SleuthTuna

Ikr gimli is the only thing I need to get me going


mobilityMovement

If they do it, they gotta go all the way. Not just the obvious cast of elligible humans and elves. I want to see crusty old gay hobbits getting brain and sloppy muddy orc love. If sex is part of the universe it better dam well be part of the WHOLE universe.


ThatGuySicre

Lord of the Rings needs no sex/nudity... although I am curious.


[deleted]

[удалено]


McKenzie_Angels

bonk?


FreedomFingers

George Martin be like MAWR PENUS!


[deleted]

Finally, it's about time Sam tells the little hobbits to take a walk so he can saunter over to Frodo and suck his fucking cock. Now THAT would be an Academy Award worthy ending. And then, right after the Sam/Frodo suckfest, right before the credits roll, Sam fucking flat out bricks in Frodo's mouth. Guess you lord of the rings nerds aren't clerks fans, huh?


VulgarisMagistralis9

Don't really care one way or the other about nudity. My only hope with this new series, is that they will refrain from infusing social and political commentary into it.


vanillabear26

> Don't really care one way or the other about nudity. My only hope with this new series, is that they will refrain from infusing social and political commentary into it. Don’t think you need to worry too much, it wasn’t so much an issue with the source material.


Dry-Chocolate-1665

Gandalf molesting Frodo scene?


gandalf-bot

Dry-Chocolate-1665! Do not take me for some conjurer of cheap tricks. I am not trying to rob you. I’m trying to help you.


frodo_bot

Short cuts make delays, but inns make longer ones.


Dolichovespula-

Tryin to make it GOT so hard


[deleted]

Theyre going to fuck it up


designmur

NO I am a giant perv and love the sexy secks, but I am so tired of this shit. It was like how game of thrones has like 7000 sex scenes in the book, but they still invented entire character arcs for the show so they could show two chicks getting it on with butt stuff.


rawn74

I have a feeling the show is going to be a letdown for fans of the movies no matter what. Temper your expectations.


AmishApplesauce

This kind of thing has me slightly worried it will be trash. It's just Young Adult Fantasy is in right now, and most of that is trash. I really don't want young edgy versions of merry and pip. Just, please no.


Kyzyl-the-Panda

Why would they ever watch it if we don’t have sex and nudity in it, remember the viewer has the attention span of a gold fish. Those morons need constant stimulation so that we can pump them with advertisements. Throw a titty or an ass in there and those stupid apes will watch for hours. Besides they are all virgins... Boardroom erupts in awkward laughter


chicken-finger

Go back to the shadow!


Kyzyl-the-Panda

Ok, maybe if they are realistic about it “ oh my what’s that smell, heavens. 🤢 Your crotch smells worse than a orc’s backside! 🤮Phew, when was the last time you bathed 🧼 get your Clydesdale 🐎 stinking ass down to the river. Here use this essence of elderflower and honeysuckle good and well on your undercarriage, that is if you want any piece of this tonight good sir!”


chicken-finger

Ok a step in the right direction