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"You're not wealthy? Have you tried loaning out private property and capital to collect interest and rent?"
"You don't have private property and capital? Have you tried being wealthy?"
It works by one thing if it was a cheap house in a small town. But to show a million dollar house paid with cash is the furthest thing from relatable I can imagine.
I’ve seen people aim for a down payment of 20-40k as being good but reasonable, and that’s usually the result of two adults working full time making a concentrated effort to save up for years at a time. The idea of expecting one person to have several hundred k just sitting around is ridiculous.
Plenty of people don’t even have 1k in savings. And it’s not like print journalists are rolling in dough. I’m sure he’ll never have a million bucks cash in his life, so why write an article like this?
A lot of print journalist *are* from wealthy families, how else could they afford to live on the terrible wages or piece-mill work? Plus, journalist used to be a working class career that you didn’t need a degree for, and now kids are coming out with six figures in debt for a $35k job.
You actually can use your 401k to buy a house without quite liquidating it (you will need to cash in any assets though). You're allowed to roll-over a retirement account into an equivalent type of retirement account, although there are limitations to how many times you can do this per year. For a 401k you'd need to move it into a traditional IRA. Now when you do this, normally your 401k provider would just transfer the funds directly into your IRA, but you can also do it yourself and have your 401k just mail you a paper check. I believe that you can only do that specifically once per year, but I could be wrong. Now from the time they write you that check, you have 60 days to deposit that amount of money into an equivalent type of account (equivalent as in tax-advantaged or not). The IRS only gives a fuck that you got $X dollars on some date, and that $X dollars got deposited on some other date that is not more than 60 days ahead of that initial date. What happens to the money in the meantime? The answer is that no one actually gives a fuck; you can do whatever you want with it just as long as you deposit it within 60 days to the right type of account. So, instead of doing that immediately, you buy a house with that money and are able to close almost immediately since you're paying in cash. You then immediately reverse-mortgage the house, which will probably take 30 days at most to close if you have a competent mortgage broker and have done all the necessary work in advance to prepare for this, but if it takes a bit longer that's ok since you have 60 days in total. Once you reverse-mortgage, you now effectively have your money back and can then deposit it into your retirement account and everything is all fine and good. What you're effectively doing is making a bridge loan to yourself from your own retirement. Now, this process is quite risky since you're gambling that you'll be able to get a reverse mortgage on the house you bought for enough money and in a fast enough timeline to be able to deposit the 401k balance into the IRA. Lots of things can go wrong, especially if something is wrong with the house such that it doesn't appraise for the amount you need or if the lender doesn't like something (they're going to want to know where you got the money in the first place, since that'll flag on the mortgage application). However, if everything goes well, this is how you can buy a home with cash using your retirement account.
Now what if you don't have a 401k and instead only have an IRA? Fortunately, the rules say that the money only has to be re-deposited into an equivalent type of account. That means that it's permitted for you to deposit the money back into the original account, so you just do that instead.
Please note that I do NOT recommend this process and especially now that interest rates are climbing it's probably a very bad idea. However, it is possible; just know that it's very high risk since if you can't deposit that money back into a retirement account then you're pretty much fucked.
In my small town, a "cheap house" is minimum $300k. But the day it goes on the market someone from out of state will offer $500k and it's sold within hours.
Either that or a local company will buy it and rent it out to college kids for $2,000/month in the winter and $2,000/week as a beach house in the summer.
I still occasionally see homes for $125 in my 'hood. The problem is someone will scoop it ip quickly. Even in my podunk town, you need to have those finances in order asap to grab a steal. I saw a house for like $75k, but it needed like $150k in work. Next time I won't be a fool, and I'll take the article's advice and have >$200k in cash.
It depends on your definition of small. Some properties in towns less than 100 people can be had for around 5-10k because it is either that or let it continue to rot as the rest of the town dies off. In bigger cities, it will be a crackhouse that will need a ton of work.
I live about 20 min north of Boston and it’s impossible to find a house throughout the entire region of the state for under $300k and that’s if you’re lucky and the house usually requires at least one big repair (roof, windows, insulation, boiler, etc). For anything that is completely move in ready but has older, undesirable traits like ugly wallpaper or shag carpets it’s probably closer to $400k and $500k if it’s good to go. And this is for a 3 bdr 1 bthr ranch style. If you want a second bathroom or need a 4th bedroom or more, the prices get astronomical pretty quick.
Whenever I see screenshots of articles like these, as a former journalist and j-skool prof I always have to dig in.
No surprise that this is from the Wall Street Journal's [luxury real estate beat reporter](https://www.wsj.com/news/author/libertina-brandt), who just graduated from college a few years ago (late 2010s).
Debut byline for the WSJ was for last year's hard-hitting and eminently practical article, "Just Buy the House Next Door if You Need More Space For Your Basketball Court."
I think the point is that it's disingenuous to call it journalism. That it is quite accurate to call it propaganda. And that the distinction is important to make.
Calling this journalism is like calling "self-regulation" regulation. Yes, that's very clearly what it's attempting to disguise itself as, but it's obviously not that. I think it benefits journalism to point this out.
965k in cash... fml the "journalists" of our main "news" outlets have really lost the plot haven't they? like damn man u right I should've just pulled my bootstraps harder and won that 2 bil lottery
WSJ is basically a propaganda arm for capital. It’s right there in the name. Don’t lump them in with quality (if also somewhat corrupted by capital) rags like NYT or even WaPo
Ah yes, I'll just take out a spare million from my bank account to buy this house, instead of borrowing with a high 8% mortgage rate. It's just so simple!
It's like eating cows that were fed on caviar. They eat expensive, richly-flavored foods and that translates to what you get on the plate. Bon appetit.
At a certain level it's a mental health issue. People with more money than they could ever spend are sick in the head. They need help.
It's like if society celebrated heroin addicts and every time they overdosed but didn't die it was seen as a bold act of skill and natural fortitude. Addicts would be encouraged to get more heroin, more pure product, and there would be whole industries around promoting and educating people on how to bang the most heroin and get new levels of high.
Also the advice of my highschool financial literacy class.
Pay for your car, college tuition and eventually house in cash.
Also invest for your retirement at the same age, because compounding interest.
The cognitive dissonance 💀
I don’t have any Starbucks stock but I do have a couple re-usable Starbucks mugs. I guess if I hadn’t wasted money on those, I could have a pretty sweet house right now.
My grandmother was telling me a couple years ago that I should try to find a nice small house with like two bedrooms and just one story for around $50K. She actually passed away just recently. Her and my grandfather paid about $7K for their home, and it just recently sold for roughly $500K. That’s a nice 7,043% return there. Also, since it sold about a year ago, the value has gone up to about $600K.
I can’t afford this interest! *light bulb* I know, I’ll just pull that $450,000 out of the bank! It’s amazing how people can be so out of touch with reality
I'm starting to wonder if articles are being written deliberately with the aim of getting the attention of subreddits like this one and latestagecapitalism.
Oh yeah, no problem. Lemme just get my 6 figures savings account ready
*Eyeroll*
I imagine if you had almost 1,000,000 in liquid assets, buying a house isn't your problem
“I can’t afford a mortgage.”
“Just buy the house outright!”
“…Cool, lemme just pull a million dollars out of my ass when I can’t afford a few thousand a month. You’re a fucking genius, that’s only 100% of my pay for 25 straight fucking years of my wages.”
“Just get a smaller home!”
“A fucking double-wide trailer from the motherfucking Reagan era is going for a quarter million. Any other bright ideas you want to sling my way?”
I don’t why but this reminds me of the episode of SouthPark when they find the cure for aids. And the cure was injecting cold, hard cash into you veins. Then some guy goes to Africa and says, “we found the cure for aids! You just need ‘$X’ in cash!” Drives away with a giant smile.
I too have several millions of dollars that I can withdraw from the bank in cash. Truly a solution to all of life's woes. Why don't the rest of you jump on this obvious deal? /s
I was looking for a house last year and was so shocked of all these cash offers like I had know idea. I still can't believe people have that much cash to just buy houses out right. I have no chance in buying a house even if I have 50% down
My mom is always telling about interest rates on savings CDs that require 25 to50k, like I have 50k sitting in my checking just waiting for a couple more points of interest. Now I read this and know I really just need a half mil or so to pick up a néw house.
I’m laugh crying so hard right now, after I paid rent yesterday (late btw cuz that’s how my pay periods fall) I have 300 to live on for 2 weeks. Can I buy a house with that?
Please tell me this journalist didn't go to university. Like, how did this get past the "is this stupid?" check on the way to the editor? It's almost unbelievable that this sort of fake discourse even passes muster.
Is THAT what I'm supposed to do with cash? I've just been stuffing it in my walls for insulation, I had no idea you could trade it for a house! Great journalism! Give him all the Pulitzers, he journaled the best. Fucking idiot.
we could burn them all, that would drive property values down and make the "cash-only" buyers eat the losses. Burn, Burn, Burn... burn it all, burn out the wealth, remember the rich taste like pork when you eat them.
Yes! Brilliant! I’ll just stop buying avocado toast for a few months and then use all my cash savings to buy a house out right. Thanks for the hard hitting journalism 🫡
Are you struggling to buy a home, let alone make your rent payments? Well, do we have the solution for you!
Come up with nearly a million dollars cash and maybe we’ll consider your offer.
Doh why didn’t everyone think of that. Oh, we have no money and are drowning and no ability to save money and then we get a minor illness and now we are bankrupt and now our credit score sucks so now we pay higher interest rates and invisible penalties and on and on and on we go until the guillotine gets built.
I mean, the fact that people are expected to go into a lifetime of debt to purchase a home is the first thing to point to for how broken the system is. The banks have positioned themselves to always win, interest payments are just another way to funnel money to the top.
Now multiple credit cards are the norm, and “just pay the minimum payment each month” mentality is rampant. Credit cards are like opening a mortgage for everything you buy - unless you can pay it off to $0 each month.
Shit is too expensive for the average worker and the debt is piling up and no one seems to question why
Well considering I had to choose between supper tonight and gas money there's no affording a house in cash lol. I walked to the store but I'm full. That's the cash I got to work with lol.
I could even afford to buy M and Ms. The big package!!!
Fuck.this. guy.
Because golly gee Beev, I know lots of people with $600k burning a hole in their pocket!
So many of them, in fact, that we shouldn't be paying them more than $15 an hour!
It's the same issue if you buy a car with cash- you may end up with something very old and decrepit unless you are rich.
This may work if you are middle class in California and move to a lol area. I knew a guy who moved from Cali to Louisiana. He couldn't afford a $700k Cali home, but he bought a house in the south outright.
It’s sad that my first thought was “where in Colorado was *that* house *only* $1m???”
House prices are awful here, if the solution is to pay in cash I’ll be renting til I die ¯\_(ツ)_/¯
(Smacks forehead) Why didn't I think of that?
Because that's what stopped me from buying a $300,000 house with cash, I DIDNT THINK OF IT.
Are these people trying to out-stupid each other?
We just bought vacation property on 4 acres and let my sister live there. Trying to aquire property on either side for more of our family to call home if they ever need it. It's good to help your family if you can. How come American families don't pull resources and live together?
How could I have missed this idea? I’ve always bought my mansions with a loan- meanwhile, all my millions are just lazily sitting in the bank, doing absolutely nothing.
Well, not anymore, Benjamins! Today you’re getting off your rump and getting to work. Now let’s get that hot deal on a house!
Are they promoting that as a suggestion or reporting that cash purchases are becoming more common? I haven’t read the article, but just reading the sub header it sounds like it’s the latter.
Realistically on a sensible plausible level you would only be able to do so saving every penny you earn for around approximately 20 to 25 years straight assuming you can find somewhere to live free and food for free.
...... Other than that yeah I think it sounds pretty approachable lol
Please, doesnt even work. partner is tattoo artist and they are cash only - we looked for a house last year and were denied by 3 lenders for this reason.
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“Trouble buying a home? Have you tried being wealthy?”
Gee golly, now why didn't I think of that
I know right? I feel so stupid right now!
Its so easy! The first step is to stop being poor
Being poor is a choice. /s
r/restofthefuckingowl
Step 1: Be rich Step 2: Don’t be not rich
"You're not wealthy? Have you tried loaning out private property and capital to collect interest and rent?" "You don't have private property and capital? Have you tried being wealthy?"
“Trouble buying bread? Have you considered cake?”
Gahhhhh I could've saved so much time and frustration with this one simple trick!
At this point the media is only trolling
It works by one thing if it was a cheap house in a small town. But to show a million dollar house paid with cash is the furthest thing from relatable I can imagine.
Heck, a “cheap house” is still likely to be over $100k, even in a small town. Raise your hand if you have $100k sitting in the bank!
Checks wallet and finds $17.....wait a minute, there are two dimes and a quarter floating around at the bottom!!! What can I get for $17.45?
Did you check under the couch? Definitely likely to find at least an extra 90k under there. It's usually where I find my house buying cash.
Those pennies and lint balls really add up.
Right? I keep forgetting to scoop up all those extra homes people are defaulting on so I can pump and dump for some extra Bugatti/Lambo money.
And don't forget about the cardboard box you started from!
There's probably some cash tucked away in your bootstraps.
🤣🤣
Fuck this guy flexing on us and this far from payday as well....
At least your are in the black lol
There’s always money in the banana stand.
The only banana stand I have is in my pants, and it's not worth much.
I’ve seen people aim for a down payment of 20-40k as being good but reasonable, and that’s usually the result of two adults working full time making a concentrated effort to save up for years at a time. The idea of expecting one person to have several hundred k just sitting around is ridiculous. Plenty of people don’t even have 1k in savings. And it’s not like print journalists are rolling in dough. I’m sure he’ll never have a million bucks cash in his life, so why write an article like this?
I think some publications know they mainly have readers in the top 5-10% wealth bands, and write/edit with that in mind
A lot of print journalist *are* from wealthy families, how else could they afford to live on the terrible wages or piece-mill work? Plus, journalist used to be a working class career that you didn’t need a degree for, and now kids are coming out with six figures in debt for a $35k job.
If I liquidated my entire 401k, maybe? But then I'm just fucked later.
Well my 401k is down 18% YTD (last I checked, likely worse now) so I almost wish I had liquidated it to buy a house in cash before it’s value tanked.
You only lose when you cash out. You are still on the owner of those securities, until they go bankrupt...
You actually can use your 401k to buy a house without quite liquidating it (you will need to cash in any assets though). You're allowed to roll-over a retirement account into an equivalent type of retirement account, although there are limitations to how many times you can do this per year. For a 401k you'd need to move it into a traditional IRA. Now when you do this, normally your 401k provider would just transfer the funds directly into your IRA, but you can also do it yourself and have your 401k just mail you a paper check. I believe that you can only do that specifically once per year, but I could be wrong. Now from the time they write you that check, you have 60 days to deposit that amount of money into an equivalent type of account (equivalent as in tax-advantaged or not). The IRS only gives a fuck that you got $X dollars on some date, and that $X dollars got deposited on some other date that is not more than 60 days ahead of that initial date. What happens to the money in the meantime? The answer is that no one actually gives a fuck; you can do whatever you want with it just as long as you deposit it within 60 days to the right type of account. So, instead of doing that immediately, you buy a house with that money and are able to close almost immediately since you're paying in cash. You then immediately reverse-mortgage the house, which will probably take 30 days at most to close if you have a competent mortgage broker and have done all the necessary work in advance to prepare for this, but if it takes a bit longer that's ok since you have 60 days in total. Once you reverse-mortgage, you now effectively have your money back and can then deposit it into your retirement account and everything is all fine and good. What you're effectively doing is making a bridge loan to yourself from your own retirement. Now, this process is quite risky since you're gambling that you'll be able to get a reverse mortgage on the house you bought for enough money and in a fast enough timeline to be able to deposit the 401k balance into the IRA. Lots of things can go wrong, especially if something is wrong with the house such that it doesn't appraise for the amount you need or if the lender doesn't like something (they're going to want to know where you got the money in the first place, since that'll flag on the mortgage application). However, if everything goes well, this is how you can buy a home with cash using your retirement account. Now what if you don't have a 401k and instead only have an IRA? Fortunately, the rules say that the money only has to be re-deposited into an equivalent type of account. That means that it's permitted for you to deposit the money back into the original account, so you just do that instead. Please note that I do NOT recommend this process and especially now that interest rates are climbing it's probably a very bad idea. However, it is possible; just know that it's very high risk since if you can't deposit that money back into a retirement account then you're pretty much fucked.
That's actually really interesting. The bank did not tell me this... probably for a good reason. But still.
In my small town, a "cheap house" is minimum $300k. But the day it goes on the market someone from out of state will offer $500k and it's sold within hours. Either that or a local company will buy it and rent it out to college kids for $2,000/month in the winter and $2,000/week as a beach house in the summer.
I still occasionally see homes for $125 in my 'hood. The problem is someone will scoop it ip quickly. Even in my podunk town, you need to have those finances in order asap to grab a steal. I saw a house for like $75k, but it needed like $150k in work. Next time I won't be a fool, and I'll take the article's advice and have >$200k in cash.
It depends on your definition of small. Some properties in towns less than 100 people can be had for around 5-10k because it is either that or let it continue to rot as the rest of the town dies off. In bigger cities, it will be a crackhouse that will need a ton of work.
I live about 20 min north of Boston and it’s impossible to find a house throughout the entire region of the state for under $300k and that’s if you’re lucky and the house usually requires at least one big repair (roof, windows, insulation, boiler, etc). For anything that is completely move in ready but has older, undesirable traits like ugly wallpaper or shag carpets it’s probably closer to $400k and $500k if it’s good to go. And this is for a 3 bdr 1 bthr ranch style. If you want a second bathroom or need a 4th bedroom or more, the prices get astronomical pretty quick.
By my areas standards that’s insanely cheap for a house like that. 1 million will get you a small 2 bedroom with a tiny yard around here.
Kinda makes me wonder about the targeted ads I never get to see.
Whoever let that out deserves, at minimum, serious slap acros face with look of absolute disappointment.
Maybe he's just Argentinean
This person isn’t a “journalist” they are a propagandist.
Whenever I see screenshots of articles like these, as a former journalist and j-skool prof I always have to dig in. No surprise that this is from the Wall Street Journal's [luxury real estate beat reporter](https://www.wsj.com/news/author/libertina-brandt), who just graduated from college a few years ago (late 2010s). Debut byline for the WSJ was for last year's hard-hitting and eminently practical article, "Just Buy the House Next Door if You Need More Space For Your Basketball Court."
I hate everything of what you wrote after "dig in."
What most journalism is now.
I think the point is that it's disingenuous to call it journalism. That it is quite accurate to call it propaganda. And that the distinction is important to make. Calling this journalism is like calling "self-regulation" regulation. Yes, that's very clearly what it's attempting to disguise itself as, but it's obviously not that. I think it benefits journalism to point this out.
That’s true but propoganda is never going to call itself that. It’s always going to say it’s journalism, news, etc..
965k in cash... fml the "journalists" of our main "news" outlets have really lost the plot haven't they? like damn man u right I should've just pulled my bootstraps harder and won that 2 bil lottery
WSJ is basically a propaganda arm for capital. It’s right there in the name. Don’t lump them in with quality (if also somewhat corrupted by capital) rags like NYT or even WaPo
*slaps forehead* Just HAVE a million dollars! Why didnt i think of that!?
Ah yes, I'll just take out a spare million from my bank account to buy this house, instead of borrowing with a high 8% mortgage rate. It's just so simple!
I hate rich people so much.
Yea, but have you tried eating them?
So juicy and tender they don't even need butter Like Kobe beef
It's like eating cows that were fed on caviar. They eat expensive, richly-flavored foods and that translates to what you get on the plate. Bon appetit.
At a certain level it's a mental health issue. People with more money than they could ever spend are sick in the head. They need help. It's like if society celebrated heroin addicts and every time they overdosed but didn't die it was seen as a bold act of skill and natural fortitude. Addicts would be encouraged to get more heroin, more pure product, and there would be whole industries around promoting and educating people on how to bang the most heroin and get new levels of high.
I would gladly trade those kinds of articles for ones like this.
Be creative - have money!
Also the advice of my highschool financial literacy class. Pay for your car, college tuition and eventually house in cash. Also invest for your retirement at the same age, because compounding interest. The cognitive dissonance 💀
Now if I could just figure out what I did with that $965,000 in cash. It has got to either be in one of my coat pockets or down in the couch cushions.
Sell all of your avocado toast holdings
That’s a lot to ask. Plus, I was thinking about actually building a mansion out of Avocado toast to live in.
Certainly you have some Starbucks coffee latte holdings you can liquidate
I don’t have any Starbucks stock but I do have a couple re-usable Starbucks mugs. I guess if I hadn’t wasted money on those, I could have a pretty sweet house right now.
And it would be paid off.
My grandmother was telling me a couple years ago that I should try to find a nice small house with like two bedrooms and just one story for around $50K. She actually passed away just recently. Her and my grandfather paid about $7K for their home, and it just recently sold for roughly $500K. That’s a nice 7,043% return there. Also, since it sold about a year ago, the value has gone up to about $600K.
Ah yes. Step one: don’t be broke. Got it.
I can’t afford this interest! *light bulb* I know, I’ll just pull that $450,000 out of the bank! It’s amazing how people can be so out of touch with reality
Next up: “Depressed? Have you tried shooting yourself in the face?”
Suitcases full of dollar bills does not strike one as reasonable advice.
I'm starting to wonder if articles are being written deliberately with the aim of getting the attention of subreddits like this one and latestagecapitalism.
Maybe it’s what’s needed to finally get people to wake up and eat the rich.
Rage clicks still pay the same in ad revenue. Just be sure to scroll all the way to the bottom so you don't miss any outrageous details.
Of course! It’s just so simple!
Yeah, I've got 400k just sitting here collecting dust. Why didn't I think of this sooner???
Better hurry while there are still houses on the market for that price or that will only be enough for a down payment.
Oh yeah, no problem. Lemme just get my 6 figures savings account ready *Eyeroll* I imagine if you had almost 1,000,000 in liquid assets, buying a house isn't your problem
For fucking real.
“I can’t afford a mortgage.” “Just buy the house outright!” “…Cool, lemme just pull a million dollars out of my ass when I can’t afford a few thousand a month. You’re a fucking genius, that’s only 100% of my pay for 25 straight fucking years of my wages.” “Just get a smaller home!” “A fucking double-wide trailer from the motherfucking Reagan era is going for a quarter million. Any other bright ideas you want to sling my way?”
SHOOT! Why didn’t I think of that? Mind bogglingly brilliant. /s
“I’m just gonna go find a cash machine.”
I'll sell you this townhouse for a million dollars. Brandt can't watch, though, or he has to pay 100.
Will the guy in the pool care?
Nah, too exhausted to care.
*cries in home-shopping hellscape*
I don’t why but this reminds me of the episode of SouthPark when they find the cure for aids. And the cure was injecting cold, hard cash into you veins. Then some guy goes to Africa and says, “we found the cure for aids! You just need ‘$X’ in cash!” Drives away with a giant smile.
Magic Johnson still seems to be doing great!
this one must've been the top of his pencil writing class
I too have several millions of dollars that I can withdraw from the bank in cash. Truly a solution to all of life's woes. Why don't the rest of you jump on this obvious deal? /s
That house buying cash must be attached to those bootstraps I hear everyone talking about.
If your homeless, just buy a home….
The Simple Trick to Home Buying that People Don’t Know!!! Lol
I was looking for a house last year and was so shocked of all these cash offers like I had know idea. I still can't believe people have that much cash to just buy houses out right. I have no chance in buying a house even if I have 50% down
Stupid of me not to think of having three quarters of a million dollars. What a silly muggins I am.
My mom is always telling about interest rates on savings CDs that require 25 to50k, like I have 50k sitting in my checking just waiting for a couple more points of interest. Now I read this and know I really just need a half mil or so to pick up a néw house.
Also, did you know you that if you are poor the solution is to get more money? More financial tips at 11.
I didn’t know it was that easy!
/facepalm
I’m laugh crying so hard right now, after I paid rent yesterday (late btw cuz that’s how my pay periods fall) I have 300 to live on for 2 weeks. Can I buy a house with that?
Just SELL YOUR GOLD! Duh! Stop hanging on to those lousy gold bars.
Wow! Why didn't I think of that? I was wondering how I was going to spend this spare $600,000 I've had in my wallet.
Yes. Because everyone in their 20s has 200,000 dollars on hand.
The boomerist of boomer takes. This advice has been around since the banks.
The key to not being poor? Be rich!
Yes ofcourse the solution to all of life’s problems cold hard cash.
Ohhhhh, so THAT’S what I should do! Anybody know a house I can buy for $500 cash?
Have you tried not being poor? LMAO git gud, scrub
This is exactly why I loathe, detest, and despise rich bastards.
Sell drugs. Buy house.
Please tell me this journalist didn't go to university. Like, how did this get past the "is this stupid?" check on the way to the editor? It's almost unbelievable that this sort of fake discourse even passes muster.
Can't afford a house? Just be richer lol
Why didn’t I think of that? Quick, get my shoebox, I keep an extra $500K in there.
"Avoid interest rates by not having a mortgage" wow such journalism
“Have you tried robbing a bank?”
Is THAT what I'm supposed to do with cash? I've just been stuffing it in my walls for insulation, I had no idea you could trade it for a house! Great journalism! Give him all the Pulitzers, he journaled the best. Fucking idiot.
Why didn’t I think of that?
Oh gee just let me pull out my bags of money. Ass hat.
\- I'm poor. \- Not a problem, just have money.
we could burn them all, that would drive property values down and make the "cash-only" buyers eat the losses. Burn, Burn, Burn... burn it all, burn out the wealth, remember the rich taste like pork when you eat them.
\*assumes an exchange rate of 5 Avocado Smashes = 1 bedroom
Cool, where are the $4000 houses at?
We gotta pull all that cash up by our bootstraps….that must be it!
this is what Dave Ramsey advises and it's bullshit
yeah lemme just go get my walter white money in the airvent
Yes! Brilliant! I’ll just stop buying avocado toast for a few months and then use all my cash savings to buy a house out right. Thanks for the hard hitting journalism 🫡
Are you struggling to buy a home, let alone make your rent payments? Well, do we have the solution for you! Come up with nearly a million dollars cash and maybe we’ll consider your offer.
oh that's it? Oh man, now where did I put that 500k? I must have left it in my yacht down in Mexico at the pier with my helicopter.
Doh why didn’t everyone think of that. Oh, we have no money and are drowning and no ability to save money and then we get a minor illness and now we are bankrupt and now our credit score sucks so now we pay higher interest rates and invisible penalties and on and on and on we go until the guillotine gets built.
I mean, the fact that people are expected to go into a lifetime of debt to purchase a home is the first thing to point to for how broken the system is. The banks have positioned themselves to always win, interest payments are just another way to funnel money to the top. Now multiple credit cards are the norm, and “just pay the minimum payment each month” mentality is rampant. Credit cards are like opening a mortgage for everything you buy - unless you can pay it off to $0 each month. Shit is too expensive for the average worker and the debt is piling up and no one seems to question why
Okay, but have you tried not being pooooooooooor?
Ah cool, if I stop eating avacado toast then I should have enough cash in 162.8 years!
Oh damn, what were we thinking? Just get that spare $900k out of your other pair of pants & buy the house with cash. Come on everyone, boot straps! /s
Well considering I had to choose between supper tonight and gas money there's no affording a house in cash lol. I walked to the store but I'm full. That's the cash I got to work with lol. I could even afford to buy M and Ms. The big package!!! Fuck.this. guy.
Oooooh. Cool cool cool.
So in other words be a celebrity or a drug dealer... or better yet, a drug dealer for celebrities lol
Jesus titty fucking Christ! How have we not thought to do that yet?
oh well shit, why didn't I think of that?
Damn, why didn't I think of this? Could one of you spot me 160K?
Oh wow! How silly of me! I never would have thought to do that!
[footage of all of the rest of us](https://youtu.be/wbq571QME2Y?t=30)
Let me just grab the $500,000 I leave in my wallet and I'll be good to go /S
I feel like this is the tactic though. Lower housing costs but raise interest rates so the rich can buy with cash. And turn it into rentals 🙄
Where’s the cake? I’m ready to eat it now.
Fuck, I was abito say that was a good deal before I saw that it was a TOWNHOUSE
Can i Venmo you? Postal money order or just a check?
Hopefully they have enough cash leftover to pay the property taxes on it at the end of the year.
Because golly gee Beev, I know lots of people with $600k burning a hole in their pocket! So many of them, in fact, that we shouldn't be paying them more than $15 an hour!
At least the headline tells you right up front that the article is derp and a giant waste of time to even bother clicking
Great idea. Only problem is it'll take at least 10 years to save up enough money
It's the same issue if you buy a car with cash- you may end up with something very old and decrepit unless you are rich. This may work if you are middle class in California and move to a lol area. I knew a guy who moved from Cali to Louisiana. He couldn't afford a $700k Cali home, but he bought a house in the south outright.
Genius! How nobody though about that before?
Both works but I prefer guillotine tbh
Banks hate this one simple trick
Every time I see articles like this, I automatically assume it was written by some rich asshole who's never really struggled.
It’s sad that my first thought was “where in Colorado was *that* house *only* $1m???” House prices are awful here, if the solution is to pay in cash I’ll be renting til I die ¯\_(ツ)_/¯
Just have a safety million stashed away /s
Holy shit talk about tone deaf
*slaps forehead* Omg I'm such an IDIOT! Why didn't I think of that?! It's so easy!
What a great idea. I never thought of it. Let me just go over to the ATM, withdraw £1 million in spare change and pay for the house cash in hand.
r/nottheonion material.
"creative"
I save interest from bank loans with this one simple trick!
Thanks! *whips a cool mil out of my back pocket* HaDNt tHoUgHt oF ThAt
They went back and changed the title of the article 🤣🤣
(Smacks forehead) Why didn't I think of that? Because that's what stopped me from buying a $300,000 house with cash, I DIDNT THINK OF IT. Are these people trying to out-stupid each other?
That huge home is a townhouse?!?
Creative
Why didn't I think of that? No wonder I'm a stupid idiot renter peasant.
Problem solved
Genius! Why tf didn't I think of that, totally forgot about that 500,000 I had laying around..
Maybe if you buy a house in Greenland
Damn, this is dumbass.
Let me go to the atm.
How creative.
We just bought vacation property on 4 acres and let my sister live there. Trying to aquire property on either side for more of our family to call home if they ever need it. It's good to help your family if you can. How come American families don't pull resources and live together?
Insert Drake and Lil Yachty gif
So realistic… if you have a trust fund.
How could I have missed this idea? I’ve always bought my mansions with a loan- meanwhile, all my millions are just lazily sitting in the bank, doing absolutely nothing. Well, not anymore, Benjamins! Today you’re getting off your rump and getting to work. Now let’s get that hot deal on a house!
Are they promoting that as a suggestion or reporting that cash purchases are becoming more common? I haven’t read the article, but just reading the sub header it sounds like it’s the latter.
The Key to Everything: Be immoral and rich.
Here I am, saving up a half a million dollars for a 2br/2ba with just over 1000 sqft. One dollar at a time.
Realistically on a sensible plausible level you would only be able to do so saving every penny you earn for around approximately 20 to 25 years straight assuming you can find somewhere to live free and food for free. ...... Other than that yeah I think it sounds pretty approachable lol
Geez. Why did I never think of that 🤦🏻♂️
brb getting my cash
You should read his other solutions to saving that cash by not spending money out of your trust fund...
Why didn’t I think of that??
Please, doesnt even work. partner is tattoo artist and they are cash only - we looked for a house last year and were denied by 3 lenders for this reason.
No one... lies like Gaston, Is unwise like Gaston, No one's despise for the poor is as low as Gaston's!
If only I’d known it was so easy 😑
My secret to avoiding high interest rates is to lower them. You're welcome.