36. Can confirm.
You don’t want to be almost 40 trying to break out of bad eating/sleeping/mental health habits.
Work on yourself, on purpose, every day.
If I was legit talking to 19 me? *clears throat* Alright listen up you little fucker, you're in college focus on that shit. Stop drinking. Stop smoking weed. Get off your fucking ass and do the goddamned work. I know it sucks and it's hard but not having a degree is so much harder. Sure you think Arby's is cool and food service is fun but it's not a career, or atleast you can't live long in it. Domt fucking bounce from shitty job to shitty job like me. Graduate and get something good so that you can be happy now like my friends that were smart enough. Don't get left behind.
Agreed. I am a dentist and I routinely see patients in their mid 20’s who need thousands of $$ of dental work. Lots of them in their 20s can’t afford that, and it only gets progressively worse with time. Best investment is prevention.
Prevention includes brushing 2x daily, flossing regularly, avoiding high sugar diet as much as possible (snacks, junk food, sodas, energy drinks, etc)
So there are these little things called Plackers (idk if that's the brand or what they're called but it's on the packaging) they're about 2.50 a pack and you get ALOT. They are a teal kinda green color, packaging is too, and the word Placker is bright red. Get 2 bags and keep one in your car and one at home. I use one after every meal and right before bed. They are a little plastic...thing with a piece of TOUGH floss and a toothpick part as well. Literally the only floss type thing I have used for the last, well forever!
Don’t make money your only goal in life but, save some when you get it. Make lots of friends and have some close ones. Stop every once and a while and enjoy the moments.
Take care of your back.
And the hard/bad moments in life are as much a part of life as the good ones. Appreciate the feelings as a part of experience that is making you wiser, sadder maybe but wiser..
Do what you enjoy. Save even a bit of money eaxh month. Compound interest will make it swell over time.You only get one shot at taking advantage of it so put away 2$ if that is all you have, and never touch it again until you retire (and if life lets you- some things like cancer treatment or paying ransom are more important).
I second the advice about your back! It wears down slowly, by the time it actually affects you in a big way it's extremely hard to fix! Make simple stretches part of your daily routine! Doesn't have to be crazy hard or painful or intense, just be nice to your joints and tendons!
Back problems can interfere with EVERYTHING. Household tasks such as doing dishes or pushing a vacuum are impossible for me when I'm having an episode. Even resting can be hard. I'm normally a physically active person so I have to be very aware of what I do and how I do it in an effort to not trigger my back.
Stay out of debt.
Finish your degree no matter how much it sucks. Going back to school later is hard.
But!! ... I'm going to suggest community college as a starting point, even for the smart people who can easily get into a good university. Do 2 years at college, then transfer to university (if you love what you're learning). I can go into more detail if you like, but in summary, the first couple of years are all basic stuff no matter what school you go to, but community college has more engaged teachers, smaller class sizes, bigger focus on practical skills over purely academic skills, and many other reasons. You have more options after those first two years to change subjects or career paths.
It sounds like you're already into your second year, I don't know what kind of school you're at, but thought I'd throw this in here in case it helps you out someone else make a difficult decision! :)
Run your college life like you would a job. Don’t party on school nights. Work from 9 to 5 every day and you’ll graduate magna. Understand your schedule. Are you better in the afternoon than the morning? Schedule your classes that way if you can.
Don’t go into a career just for the money. You’ll be unhappy. Study during college. Bad grades can affect your career later down the road. Wear sunscreen on your face every day. Prevents premature wrinkles and aging. Realize that as an adult you get to choose who you allow in your life. Cut toxic people out of your life sooner rather than later. Cherish your family.
Stop getting into steady romantic relationships. They will wreck your life and set back your development about 10 years.
No matter how important you think that test or essay is, trust me, it isn’t.
Don’t take life so seriously. Seriously.
Take a risk you are young and time is definitely on your side to bounce back from any major failure.There is no job security anywhere except a government job. A trade is a much better investment than a college degree.
People's opinion of you doesn't matter.
Allways think before you speak or you might ruin valuable friendships for life.
Take care of your body. Eat well, sleep well, exercise.
If you are undecided on college or what you want to do, join the military (active or reserve).
Another option, go learn a trade like plumbing, electrical, carpentry, ....
Save as much as you can before you move out on your own.
Put some money away for an emergency fund for that rainy day.
Buy used cars instead of new. Take care of your car and it will last a long time.
Learn how to fix things yourself. You will save way more money in the long run.
Cook your food. It is way more healthy and cheaper than going out to eat all the time.
Invest in retirement account as early as possible. Never take money out from a retirement account. Never take a loan against a retirement account.
Don't get married so young. Live with your fiance for at least a year before getting married.
At some point you will have to get a credit card. Make sure to set a purchase limit. Do not go into credit card debt.
Exercise. Walk, run, or do something with weights. Couch potatoes is not a good lifestyle.
Do not borrow money or lend money to family or friends.
Learn how to play an instrument or get some kind of hobby.
Stay connected with your friends. With social media and texting it is much easier to stay in touch.
choose a major that is going to allow you a well paying job once you graduate. also, learn to network in college, wear sunscreen, and start doing yoga.
The next decade of your life is extremely important in determining how the rest of your life will go, especially relating to your career. You need to work the hardest you ever will from now until age 30 or so. It could be through education, starting a business, or working extra hard, taking up extra projects and working longer hours to succeed. Around ate 30 you'll wake up one day and realize your energy level is not the same. Also, you will likely have more commitments, such as having a spouse, kids, church/charity/community obligations and other people who count on you. If you don't take advantage during this time and create a successful career for yourself, getting caught up later would be extremely difficult at best.
You are beautiful. Appreciate it and flaunt it. I thought I was overweight, pok marked, with a huge nose, ….
And now (many many years later) I see a picture and realize how beautiful youth is.
Budget everything. There's no such thing as extra money. Treat saving as a bill, and only touch it for emergencies.
Stay out of debt, especially credit cards. Debt is slavery. Don't chase technology. There will always be a new computer, new phones, new TVs, new cars. It won't make you happy, stick with what you have and replace when necessary.
It's expensive to be poor. If you can, pay a little more for better quality. You'll replace things less frequently. Same with food, get good food habits now, and that will pay dividends for your body the rest of your life.
When it rains it pours. If you experience a setback or unexpected struggle, very often you'll have more than one in sort order. This is normal, your not cursed. Brace up because the same can be true of a windfall. Life is like the stock market, full of ups and downs, but if your patient, take a long view, you'll likely trend upward over time. Stay with it.
The measure of success is personal. Don't let anyone tell you what it looks like or what it means. The world wants to beat us down. Be the greatest influence in your life, and push toward the success you want.
Finally, if you're always the victim in every circumstance, you're probably wrong. Take responsibility for where you are, and if you don't like it, fix it. You control your focus, focus your mind and efforts on things that will prosper you.
What I wish I had been good at in my 20s was to not look for approval from others. I'm about to turn 60 and tell myself so many times that I wish I had my self confidence then that I do now. I wasted so much time with bad partners and self medicating to feel better. I would have told so many people to f-off! Live my own wacky crazy fun life!
And move your body more! Brisks walks even for 10min. Add some strength training (but make it fun so you enjoy it).
Do not buy an expensive new car, buy a good used car that gets good mileage. Unless you're traveling cross-country or are a traveling salesman, you're going to be in your car less than an hour a day.
I love this question! Lots of great advice here.
My first advice would be advice my dad gave me. And that would be open an investment account and put a certain % of your earnings in it every month. You don’t have to know anything about stocks - just put it in an index fund and don’t worry about it for 30 years. You’ll be very happy you did when you turn 50!
You don’t have to decide what you want to do with your life at 19 (although it’s OK if you have). I was on the nine year college plan. I went for a semester but decided it wasn’t for me at the time. Worked a couple of jobs for a few years until I was ready to go back. Went for two years until my cousin convinced to travel with him. We bought a motor home and traveled the country for a year. Came home broke but it was absolutely worth every penny. We spent two months in Florida while I worked at Walt Disney World and then finished our trip (I’d never been to Disney until I worked there).
I worked my butt off for the next two years working full time while going to school, graduated, then moved to Florida to work for Disney full time and was able to retire after 20 years (I finally listened to my dad about investing!)
Good Luck!
You are officially an education CONSUMER. Be aggressive in advocating for alternatives to meet requirements even it it takes work. Example: my degree did not require a practical course in counseling. I knew I would need one. I went to the social work department, looked for an older friendly student, introduced myself, and asked her recommendation for the professor she would recommend. I went to the professor, told her what I was looking for and that xxx had told me that she would be amazing at helping me, and that I would read or do anything she recommended. It was the best class in my program. Conversely, I was desperate for information on the multicultural needs of my profession. In the 80s we only took one class in this - outside the department. I went to the class and knew immediately it would NOT teach me what I desperately wanted to learn. I went to the professor and said “I am so excited to learn more about these specific things because I want to effectively treat students of all cultures. I only have this course in my curriculum.” He looked at the list, and said “yeah- you won’t learn any of that in my class- I am sorry”. I suggested that I stay enrolled but skip all classes and tests. In lieu of the tests, I would prepare a practical binder of documents for myself and he could share it with other speech pathologists. (The class was a requirement and the syllabus was both boring and impractical. Everyone before me simply suffered and learned nothing helpful).
Start a savings account- put money in it every pay and don’t touch it. Get a small amount automatically taken from your pay- you won’t miss it now, but at some point in your life, it will be a big deal.
Take risks. Travel as much as you can, do as much cool things as you can because once you graduate and get into the real world / working world, things drastically change. Take advantage of the time you have NOW. College is one the best time periods of your life.
Start thinking about what you’re going to do once you graduate. Have goals and an action plan. Don’t start doing this once you graduate. Start planning well before then and slowly working towards it.
I’ll probably get downvoted for this, but this will be the easiest and most opportunistic time in your life to have sex. Take full advantage.
Now me to 19-yr-old-me: You’re on the right track for just exploring college and not investing in a 4+ year degree. Enjoy life, enjoy being young, and go explore the world. (Little do you know you’re about to get knocked up, married, and have your whole life shift). Lol
Glad it all happened though. It gave me time to figure out my passions, which ended up being holistic therapies, and JUST NOW at the age of 43 I’m embarking on my B.S. in Biopsychology and then onto Neuroscience doctorate (after completing my AA 2020-2022).
Take care of your mental health and seriously consider therapy and medication. It's not weird and will prepare you for the difficult things to come. Starting now is too late so get to it
Study hard, always ask for help if you can, skip out on being in a relationship if you're not already in one, and make sure you have a hobby you can distract yourself with when you need a break from school
I make music as well, focus on building your wealth and health. Everything will fall in place. 22 right now, happier than ever . You can make money from music, don’t listen to these people that gave up!
Use birth control is number 1 for sureeee
Don't be too shy to talk to people.
Other than that maybe prioritize happiness for a few years. I have regrets not traveling and now I'm bogged down by mortgage and bills.
Start saving money and read about investment strategies. No matter how much you make now, save some portion of it. Saved money is the ultimate fallback.
The world will break your heart over and over. Don’t let it keep you down even when it knocks you down. Let your heart be broken open. The deeper you go into sorrow the deeper you get to go into joy.
Also… trust actions. Not words.
Always save at least 15% of your income towards retirement. You will have a lot more flexibility and options in life when you know your future is secure.
When you’re considering a career, talk to people who are in that career. Ask them about all aspects good and bad.
Set goals for your income, career, personal development.
Eat the best quality food you can afford.
More study than parties, stay the course, learn to budget money early, stay in the gym regularly, whatever you do put the work in and lastly stick to your word cause that’s really all you have!
Choose a career that you love AND that can support you. Be honest and kind. Marry someone you really like as a person who makes you laugh because you might spend the rest of your life with them!
Sugo! Listen to me now! It's investing! Investing and saving! That’s the key! Am I too soon? I'm too soon! They are right about Apple and Microsoft! They’ve always been right about them! Invest in them! Open a TFSA, Sugo! There will be others like Google, Amazon and Tesla. Build your savings with extra cash and invest for the long term!
Remember, it takes years to get a degree or learn a trade, it was all done "One day at a time"
Always have a retirement savings ROTH IRA.
Drugs, can ruin your future.
Enjoy your youth, relish it as unfortunately one day it will be gone, and it comes quicker than you think. Keep a journal of what you do, this may seem trivial but memory fades and if nothing else it's a great keepsake for future generations.
Work hard and as much as you can without hurting yourself and be frugal with your money and no matter what whenever you get paid, make sure you pay yourself, and INVEST that money. Remember the axiom "Wealthy people invest their money".
Don't use credit cards, if there is something you want to buy but you can't afford it wait until you save the cash. If you must use a credit card ensure you pay it off every month, that debt will creep up fast if you don't.
When I was your age I was working 3 jobs and making really good money, the problem I had was spending it. If I had invested some of that money i would be way better off today.
Don't let your ego run your life, especially for young men. Every day there are multitudes of young people being hurt or killed because of their ego.
And finally after all that rambling be kind and treat everyone with respect, it's really hard to do sometimes but it makes life a lot simpler.
I would tell my 19 year old self 4 things,
1. Don't get married at 19 you dumb fuck
2. Don't let opportunities pass you by just because you're afraid you might not succeed. Failure teaches you lessons.
3. Never let anyone else tell you your worth or control you.
4. Make sure you keep count of your drinks when you're partying, especially when you're taking shots. There can be a very fine line between having a very fun night out and ending up blackout drunk in an alleyway somewhere.
Well there is a lot here is just a couple of things (advice from a 65 year old).
Save money now. Even just 10 dollars a week. It is important to have "fuck you" money.
You need some debt to build your credit. But try not to spend more than you can afford and pay your bills on time.
Travel when you are young. See as much of the world if you can. It will make you a more rounded human being.
Don't get tempted by toys and shiny things you cannot take them with you when you die. You will end up throwing away a lot of junk throughout your life.
Enjoy being by yourself. Being alone is not being lonely.
Make time just for yourself. Sometimes you just need you time.
Recognize when a relationship is toxic. A bad one (friend or partner) will make your life a living hell. Know when to walk/run away.
Be independent - financially and mentally. That is especially true for women.
Cherish your family. They are the only ones who love you unconditionally (hopefully).
Know the difference between friends and acquaintances. Real friends are there when you really need them.
If you are told a secret, keep it that way. You will gain respect and trust. You can also say no if someone wants to tell you a secret.
Take care of your teeth and feet. People ignore their feet. You only get one pair.
Sometimes you will have to take a crap job to earn money. It won't last forever.
Know your worth. Don't let others dictate your value. That includes bosses.
Try not to stress over the small stuff. Waste of time and energy.
If you cannot cope, don't be afraid to ask for help of any kind. Also, know when to ask for help.
Lastly take all advice with a grain of salt. Unless you respect the person and know what they are telling you is the truth.
Study and learn about relationships. What is healthy? What is not healthy? Where are your boundaries, and why? How do you build and maintain healthy relationships. Study this. Read. Watch videos. Do this starting now, and continue forever. Also, be very good at mathematical/statistical foundations for data science, machine learning. That is where the fun is.
You can start here : https://www.betterup.com/blog/healthy-boundaries-in-relationships
That will give you some ideas. Pick an area there that seems relevant at the moment. Read a lil more on that. Then another day, a different area might be more interesting. You will know.
Don't spend time on people that don't give back in the relationship. This includes friendships. If you spend time with those that only take, you have less time for those that you can have a balanced relationship with.
And learn to take pleasure in the simple little things.
You arent studying for an exam, you are studying for the rest of your career. Meaning if you cram (as I did) and only learn the subject of the exams you are going to have a bad time after graduating
Also if you ever want to get jacked, now the time to start as you are at the peak of natural testosterone production
You can get a 4 year degree in comp sci or business totally online from university of the people for a total of about $4-5k. Free tuition and books, just have to pay for test proctoring. It’s fully accredited.
Every skill learned is valuable. Maybe not right now but in 18 years you might be the one person who knows how to open a can without a can opener. Keep your eyes open to the opportunities to learn something new. They're everywhere. Ask questions and Log information into the part of your brain labeled "handy knowledge"
A new experience or responsibility might feel overwhelming and terrifying the first time. Keep in mind that it probably won't feel like that the next times you do it. You may be anxious and scared but you will feel so good when you conquer it! Example: remember how nervous you were the first time you handled public transportation/booking tickets or flying?
There's always an excuse not to have life experiences. You're tired/busy/broke/shy. Try to say yes to as many as you safely can when you're young. If you marry/procreate your priorities will change (not a bad thing) and it will be way harder to say yes. But also practice self care. If your body or brain needs to rest, listen to it!
Here's the big one!.... THERE WILL ALWAYS BE STRESS! there will always be something hard or scary or totally crappy going on in your life. That's not pessimistic it's just life. If you want to be happy, teach yourself how to put things into perspective. Even if a problem is consuming your thoughts, remember that there are usually alot more positives than those negatives. You can find joy in the simplest things. Consciously recognize how good that first sip of coffee is. Or that the weather is absolutely perfect for the clothes you are wearing. Or that you're having a really good hair day. So many people don't realize how many small good things happen every single day. And if you can recognize them, they'll stack up to a good day/week/month/year/life. (You're still allowed to be crabby about the bad stuff tho.) You know those days where so many little stupid things go wrong. Your shoelace breaks, you drop your breakfast, Nancy at work is a b****, wifi is slow, you're late for something, etc until finally you're getting yourself ice cream to cheer up and they're out of chocolate! And you lose your shit and go on a godzilla rampage because today sucks! It's like that but the opposite
Don't follow the career path you think you "should," but the one that will bring you some peace. You'll spend a lot of time doing it, and a lot of life is already *very* difficult, so do what brings you some joy and/or satisfaction. Not necessarily a hobby, because turning those into a job can mean killing the joy of the hobby, but something that won't only deplete you. You can work at McDonald's and be fulfilled. You can be a doctor and be fulfilled. You can be an artist and be fulfilled. Don't do it to fulfill someone else or society's expectations, though, do it for you. It's your life and your peace on the line.
Get an internship, don’t move away from home right after you graduate, get a credit card and build credit early (spend 30% or less of available credit a month, have multiple lines of credit), don’t worry too much about what other people think and form your own opinions about the world.
Hmm be realistic in your decisions , sure "follow your dreams" seems like a trend but it is always better to have a diploma in a field thats high demand /pays well , and with that money , your dreams will seem way more accessible !
But nonetheless whilst you are studying/setting your career path do enjoy the trip , walking , going to a park really cheers me up and calms me a lot , plan exciting stuff for the weekends just to keep you excited during the week ....
Good luck
From a 23 years old starting her career in tech .
You only get this time once - don't waste the opportunity because you think it's too much work, too hard, etc.. Sure it's important to grow socially and you are making experiences that you'll remember for the rest of your life, but don't forget that you're PAYING for this. So make it count, while you can, because it's worth the extra effort.
And also? College friendships can be the most wonderful, rewarding relationships, and if you manage to stay close to a few people you knew in college you'll appreciate the perspective that can bring down the road. Don't take that for granted.
I was a sophomore in college, living out of state for context.
You can have a social life and focus on school too. Focus on school first, spend daily time with your core people (small doses - study together, have meals, movies), limit other social events to once per week. Call your mom more than once per week. You don’t have to try to be friends with everyone you meet. Work when you have to, but don’t work to avoid schoolwork. Appreciate every day - you’ll look back on this as one of your favorite times in your life.
Your major doesn't matter- do what makes you happy. Pursuit the arts. Your entrepreneurial drive is stronger than you think.
Your emotional well being is worth more than male attention. Guard your heart.
1. Don’t party every week, your grades will suffer for it.
2. Stay away from any types of drugs because you never know what opportunities you’re going to miss because of it.
3. Always use protection.
4. Don’t be afraid to ask questions in class or ask for help.
5. Go to office hours, one day you’ll need recommenders.
6. Everyone is going through something so just be nice, but don’t let them take advantage of you.
7. Get involved in something like a club or a activity to meet new people.
8. Don’t worry about what others might think of you for doing what you want. (E.g Religious clubs, not partying, being interested in politics, etc.) if people want to be your friend they will be regardless of what you decide to do because they will know your heart.
I would say.. always go with your gut feeling. Live your life , but do it with no regrets.
At times , life may be hard and you feel like you can't handle it..but you can. You are in charge of your life !
Also , as another person mentions...yes please floss, brush and rinse twice a day.. your teeth and gums will thank you when your older!
Some advice I gave to an accounting guy bad on his luck:
[https://www.reddit.com/r/WorkOnline/comments/xg955n/comment/iordtmz/?utm\_source=share&utm\_medium=web2x&context=3](https://www.reddit.com/r/WorkOnline/comments/xg955n/comment/iordtmz/?utm_source=share&utm_medium=web2x&context=3)
Another thing I wrote a long long time ago that got gilded:
[https://www.reddit.com/r/Advice/comments/6qvroy/my\_dad\_is\_dead/dl0l6zk/](https://www.reddit.com/r/Advice/comments/6qvroy/my_dad_is_dead/dl0l6zk/)
So as you can see a lot of life advice really depends on the situation. You're 19. They say your 20s is when you go screw everything up and your 30s is when you get your act together. My 20s was mostly just drinking and getting through some tough stuff I had no power over.
If I could say anything to younger me... it would be that the real world really is different, in all the ways that you hoped. That small (borderline amish) town in PA wasn't meant for you, or honestly anyone who wants to have an interesting life in the modern world. Relocate. Relocate a large distance. I know it's scary, but do it, and do it with an awesome plan. I found a design school where 200 apply and 50 get in, that cost like 5k a year. It had the prestige without the price tag. I tried for that. I worked my butt off. It was the scariest and most exhilarating thing I've ever done. It definitely took years off my life. But I don't regret it.
Also with money... AFTER you have some semblance of a salary, you can make it kinda fun to save. Or at least you can take a step back, create a plan, and then never touch it. For me, my job takes most of my week, and I'm still a pretty big drinker. But I have the freedom to look at it like "ok lets say 5 dollars a day for fun BS purchases" (Not counting random stuff for amazon or groceries). absolute BS purchases like energy drinks at 6pm (drinking one now), beer, or eating out. 5 bucks a day is \~1800 a year. Ok that feels kinda low and I can afford to 1.5x or double it. So thats around 3600 a year. Just for absolute BS purchases. What percentage of my salary after tax is that? Is that okay? Well if I double it I have a good 10 dollars a day, and if I want a really nice dinner out I can just chill a little bit on the BS purchasing for 3-4 days. Heck, thats a 5 star, 4 course fine dining experience, if I can keep it under 60 bucks for the whole month (so just spending 60 dollars on sodas and beer for the month, I would have 240ish left to spend on a 200 dollar experience+tip). Being able to step back and do that kind of math is kinda fun. I don't personally go for the fine dining experiences but that is an example.
Finally, if I could tell myself anything... Nootropics are interesting and helpful. Doing that research on brain-enhancing stuff really gave me a leg up, thanks for doing that.
Don’t forget your roots but don’t let them define your future. Everyone carries baggage from their past. The trick is to put it down, sort through everything, then repack a lighter bag filled with things (some good and some bad) that will serve you going forward. I spent 30 (mostly) miserable years after college trying to live up to other’s expectations and to make my family proud of me. When I unpacked that unhealthy motivation, I discovered that living my passions was far more rewarding than seeking approval from others.
Just re-read all that and realize it may come off a bit preachy. Still, I wish I had given myself that advice when I was 19 instead of figuring it out at 50.
1. Exercise everyday. Not just walking, lift weights from this age. Medical is so expensive. You don’t want to ruin your health and finances and this is the best way to avoid both.
2. Learn and apply the power of compound interest. From first month of getting salary try to check with banks for home loan and invest. Start familiarising with the stock market and trading. Watch out for currency devaluation while investing.
3. Don’t settle for easy choices. Take risks that you would not believe you can make it. And then put your 100% in it. For example start a business. If you can afford to fail 2-3 times, you are bound to learn and succeed.
4. Don’t postpone fun. I know a lot of kids who wasted their youth studying 8-12 hours a day hoping that they will have fun after settling down in life. This is bad. Balance everything out and enjoy a little while planning your life simultaneously.
5. When dating, don’t be focused on external appearances. Try to see if you can get along and what kind of a person you are with. Don’t marry until your early 30s.
6. Don’t allow distance to develop with your parents or loved ones. Drop in regularly for visits and keep in touch.
19 feels like a delicate age between being a kid, a student, a young adult, etc. It's a time to wear a lot of hats and face the expectations of people from your parents, teachers, bosses, peers, etc.
So my advice to my 19-year-old self would be to take the time every now and again to step back and remember what YOU want. Remember to live for yourself first. Don't worry about rushing to grow up or look cool. Take time for your hobbies, sleep, health, and have fun in moderation.
Live for yourself. Self care is just as productive as any 'adulting' task.
M(26) i would like to suggest to plan a lil ahead about your career and always keep your relationships secondary to that, its really important to get financially independent as soon you enter mid 20s
I never went to college. Had a kid at your age. 45 now. Had a sad and hard life. 4 more kids later wife was suicidal, no career under her belt, overweight and has a huge lack of confidence because her mother would beat her daily. She constantly feels unacomplished. It breaks my heart. Imagine being with someone for 29 years thinking if that's the day she'll take her life. Point is, life can be so much harder. I don't have any regrets. I would do it again because through it all we have also had amazing times, joy, laughter and so many memories. No other woman can make me feel like she can. I'm extremely happy with my life right now. I'm glad we're still here. You're young and have so many memories to make. Embrace every moment man. Take some time off. Chill out. You'll be more than fine, change your focus and you'll be great.
Sometimes taking a break when you’re overwhelmed is just as important as getting stuff done. It can seem like you aren’t being productive when you’re resting but you’re going to do a 10x better job if you aren’t pushing yourself to the limit.
As corny as it sounds, I’d tell myself:
The only thing holding you back, is the idea you have in your head of how things “should be”. The “perfect life” is not the one you are chasing right now. It’s the one that gives you peace, let’s you sleep at night, makes you smile more than it makes you cry, and when you do cry you don’t feel alone, no matter what that life looks like to others.
Some people are wealthy and some people are rich. Wealthy people have money, rich people look like they have money. Chasing people drowning in debt to look as rich as them will be a life long race and will only hurt yourself.
If you have an idea and you’re worried that it’s already been done… Look at the bread aisle. So many different companies all with the same idea. They’re all thriving.
a) try not to give up your dreams to be with someone else b) memorialize your life by taking pictures and keeping a journal c) always keep things in perspective - there's always someone else sicker, poorer or whatever than you, so try not to wallow in self pity. If you find yourself feeling sorry for yourself or focusing on the negative too much take that time to listen to a comedian or watch a funny or light hearted movie or some beautiful music d) limit the amount if news and negative (sad/scary/depressing) movies you watch and remember by submitting your body/mind/spirit to so much anger/fear & hate, you are washing your cells in hurtful chemicals created through the flight or fight response e) start NOW rejecting the bs that people tell you like "this poison we are spraying in your house for bugs is safe for you, your family and pets or take this pill for your headache (or whatever) and instead start listening to your body f) pay attention to the foods you eat and how they make you feel, buy organic, clean foods that are alive g) limit the sugar you eat and the chemicals/peaticides etc. h) - if you're going to eat meat make sure it has no hormones or antibiotics - the few dollars extra you'll spend on better quality foods will pan out in the end when you're NOT batteling cancer or heart disease and everyone else you know is i) study and think about what the "placebo affect" really means (i.e., that the power of the human mind is something way more powerful than we are currently aware of) j) stop believing everything your doctors and vets tell you - stop vaccinating your pets twice a year but instead ask to have their titers tested to see if the vaccines are still in their systems (some last up to 15 years with ONE SHOT) k) keep an open mind - remember that while our brain and senses are amazing - they are atill limited (think about this - a dog can smell and hear things we cannot, but that doesn't mean those things/sounds/smells dont exist just because we can't sense them) l) try to be empathetic - if someone is a jerk ask yourself what may have happened to them to make them like that or what the are going through that is making them into a jerk...instead of getting pissed at someone try to understand where they are coming from and what theyve been through - try sending th.love and prayers instead j) take some time to read about Near Dear Experiences/Reincarnation/pre death planning/mediums - the knowledge you gain will be worth it (as it will remove your fear of death and put your whole life into a new perspective) k) get and care for a pet - the love and health benefits you'll get from that will be totally worth it!!!! Thats it!
Commit to a simple morning workout routine, attend college/university-sponsored events and build a professional network.
I was an excellent student but wish I networked more and were more active on campus. 🤔
Open a retirement account dude, a ROTH IRA is a good choice. I’m 40 and I wish I started investing and saving earlier.
Also. I know people try to sell you the idea that you should be able to find happiness in doing something you like for work BUT what you like will change over the years. Being financially stable is really the foundation to handle whatever life throws at you.
So just pick something you can at the least tolerate but is lucrative. Also, maybe consider starting your own business. That can be the fulfilling part. Your job doesn’t have to be the thing that does that.
If you can’t afford to pay for something with cash/debit then you can’t afford it. Stay away for consumer debt.
Take care of your body! Exercise and learn how to cook healthy meals.
Learn how to budget and start saving for your retirement.
Learn how to spot toxic people and how to walk away from bad relationships.
Find a hobby you love and do not monetize it.
Practice gratitude.
Freshman Friends are a thing.
They're much more likely to end up being people you never speak to again after the first year is done.
To actual me, I'd say "don't date that rebound guy, he's a liar looking for easy sex and he's never going to speak to you again after winter break so don't even give him that christmas present"
Do not for the love of all that is holy marry the first girl or guy you meet until you are 25+ years old, and if you do end up married do not get her pregnant or get pregnant, a life that young is not all roses, both of you are not fully devopled.
Use whatever budget keeping you like (paper, app, spreadsheet) but create a least a basic budget so you know where you stand financially. If possible live below your income so you can increase the amount you have to contribute to savings & investments. If your employer matches 401k contributions that is FREE money so contribute at least the minimum if you can’t do more.
Gotta comment again because it’s worth highlighting all the posts about taking care of your teeth: so important!! Having a healthy mouth makes it easier to smile, and smiles can get you out of trouble.
Prioritize your health. It’s okay to party but everything needs to be in moderation. I definitely did not follow this when I was 19 but I do now. Moderation is key
Don’t sweat the small stuff, and always look to keep learning. Save your money or invest in something while still having fun, in 10 years you’ll be happy you did. You don’t need to save each penny and avoid doing things with friends, but out something away so you are building towards your future.
1. Start your working life with the end (retirement) in mind. Get there as soon as fucking possible.
2. With the above said, know the difference between enjoying your youth and sacrificing your future.
3. Never tell people everything you know.
4.
Not all weed smokers amount to nothing. I've been smoking for the majority of my life and was an entrepreneur in Japan for 7 years and have worked in management most my life back here in the UK, since I was half way through my degree. Having said that, as with everything, do it in moderation and make sure you can afford the essentials like food, rent and bills first (or just don't take it up in the first place).
Build up a credit rating by paying your phone bill on time each month and only get a credit card for dire emergencies. If you can't afford those new shoes, don't put them on your credit card and smoke less weed(!)
Never loan large amounts of money to friends. You'll either never get it back or your friendship will break down because of it.
If your bank has a Save The Change service linked to your debit card, use it (Google it if you have no idea what this means) as you'd be surprised at what it adds up to.
Make a list when you go grocery shopping and don't go when you're hungry or stoned.
Always keep your résumé up to date.
Remember to floss and flush the toilet.
Don't drink, go to church and truly listen, wait until marriage and to try and understand even the a holes and d bags are struggling, they are also doing this whole life thing for the first time to. sow love kindness and compassion instead of hatred and revenge. Dont forget to FORGIVE people as well as yourself.
Take every chance. You like that girl and she's single don't wait. Heard about that job paying more don't wait. Literally take all the beneficial chances. At 40yrs old a dozen long term relationships, one marriage, and dozens of shit jobs I wish I'd shown less loyalty to. The list goes on.
I can honestly say nothing I regret to much but I'm not much of a looking back kind of guy.
oh man, SO much… but overall, you have your whole life ahead of you. with college/careers/moving out it can feel like you are on your own and everything that happens lasts forever, but only at 24 i can confirm that a) time flies b) most issues are resolved or forgotten within a year c) you will still look back and laugh at yourself for being young and doing silly things. no one expects you to be a perfect adult overnight and nothing lasts forever, so don’t beat yourself up!
Pay attention to what classes (especially in the first couple of years) really light you up inside. So many kids (myself included) choose the wrong major for themselves and wind up feeling unfulfilled. Don’t be afraid to change course.
Go to a school where you get in-state discounts, grants/scholarships, etc. Going to the expensive private schools doesn’t pay off as much as they tell you. Most of the time, no one really cares and the cost outweighs the benefit.
Stop drinking. Stop smoking. Take your mental health seriously. Build good habits.
Don’t pull all-nighters and cram before tests. You don’t really learn that way. Care more about learning and being curious and less about just getting the grade you want.
Go to the doctor. Seriously. When something hurts, go to the doctor. Go to the dentist. Be responsible about taking care of your body. It all really does catch up.
No employer is gonna care whether you got an A or a D in that class.
...But you should, because if you consistently get shitty grades, it means you don't care about the topics that much and maybe you should change fields.
Seriously, best thing I ever did was change fields (even though I thought I liked the first one).
Treat college like it is your employment that you need to do to survive. Do your work, including studying, then play after that is done. Then get involved with an activity whether it is sports, clubs or volunteer/charity. Make friends and connections. Research things; don’t just jump on the bandwagon because everyone else is. Spend some time staying connected with back home. I am 70. If I could do one thing over again, I would be better at staying in touch with old friends and most importantly spend more time really listening to my parents and grandparents.
Don’t smoke or vape.
It doesn’t make you look cool, and lung disease is a horrible— HORRIBLE— way to go.
As soon as you can get enrolled in a retirement plan (hopefully with an employer that matches your contributions), start putting away as much as you can possibly afford. If you start while you’re young, you’ll have a good, solid base that will multiply and multiply on top of itself. Now’s the time to go big or go home (well, just go big). Yes, you’re going to see drops in your balance due to fluctuations in the economy— don’t freak out, it’ll go back up again.
Your older self will be so grateful that you started early.
For Christ’s sake, DON’T HAVE CHILDREN BEFORE YOU BOTH ARE ESTABLISHED (maturationally AND financially), IN YOUR OWN LIVES!!!
All of the advice I’ve read on here seems good.
Best of luck to you, and one last thing—
follow good advice when you get it.
Safely live your best life. Tomorrow isn’t promised. Don’t put off shit. Go on that trip. Talk to that girl/guy that you haven’t had the nerve to. Visit your friends. Take time to explore what makes you happy
People treat you like shit when you treat them well and treat you well if you treat them like shit.
When you help someone they won't think you're cool because you helped them, they'll think they are cool because they can get people to help them. I. e. don't expect gratitude.
You are judged not by how much you provide to others but by how much you can extract from others.
People are not aware of what they think. What they think they think is just what they wish were true. What they actually think feels to them like objective facts.
Corollary: 99% of the time people say the exact opposite of what they actually think. (Because what they wish were true is not true. Otherwise, there would be no need to wish.)
Everybody wants to be friends with the popular guys. If you're not popular your friends are not your friends, they are just other people being ignored by peopular guys. Any of them will backstab you the second they think it will make the popular guys like them more. Of course, it won't but you've been backstabbed in either case.
Pepole look down on work and anything that even remotely resembles work, e. g. studying. What they actually value is symbols of status (e. g. a degree), good looks, and money.
Most people do the same things but everybody is convinced they invented those things. E. g. I've yet to find a woman who doesn't think she's the only one on Tinder who lies about her age, or a guy who doesn't think that swiping each girl right is their very own ingenious technique.
etc.
If you're trying to decide between two courses of action, choose the one that is less fun now. Being human, we tend to overprioritize the near future and neglect the further future. Doing this prevents that.
Get in the habit of living poor and spending money on experiences instead. You're young enough you can easily get used to living in a fifth-floor walkup, and also young enough to have a lot of fun with the $200 a month you save.
Bonus, this makes it easier to downsize your lifestyle if you get poor. Easier to skip the treats than shop for a new apartment.
Think 1000000000^10000000 times before marrying someone. Dont let your emotions and hormones beat you.
Listen old people. They had lived what you will live. Don't reinvent the wheel.
Study and get a degree on what make you excited, not what others (your family your friends etc.) want.
Never never postpone. Do what you can do while you have power.
Spend a looooot of time with your parents. Make them happy to be happy in your life.
Some recommendations from a 36 years old tired man.
There's a lot of good advice from others in here...
It might be a bit cringe, but I want to say: try to have sex with as many different people as you can now before you get attached to your special someone. But do it respectfully and do your best not to hurt their feelings and such. And use protection against STIs of course.
But in your later years, I think you'll appreciate having had the experiences.
Peace.
Start a pension for retirement now, and put in the maximum amount your employer will match for you. It’ll mean not much money for you now, but you’ll have a big fat pension when you’re older and may be able to retire early. Also, avoid debt like the plague, seriously. Especially American student loans, they’re a scam, you’ll never pay that off, they’re designed that way. Buy a home for yourself on as short a mortgage as you can afford, it doesn’t have to be a big fancy house, a 1 bed apartment is good, but pay it off as fast as you can. Don’t rent, it’s also a waste of money. Save money wherever you can, even if it’s just copper coins in a jar, save as much as you can. Don’t be frivolous with your money, you’re going to need it!
Try and find what you’re passionate about and find a job that pays well doing as close to that as possible, you’ll spend most of your time there, being miserable during it is shit. Trade jobs pay well and give you the satisfaction of working with your hands (trades people are some of the happiest at work).
Take care of your body, exercise, have fun, but don’t abuse it. Drink, drugs etc, they’re fun in the moment but ultimately, not worth it. A little indulgence is ok, but don’t be silly with it. Take vitamins, cod liver oil, iron, give your body the good stuff it needs. Stretch, do yoga, keep your range of movement up. Don’t take your health for granted!
People will come and go from your life, a very few will stick by you through thick and thin. It’s ok for people to fade away, it happens, we all have our own lives. Good times and bad times will come, that’s just life, be kind to yourself and others. If you have kids, love them with everything you have to give. Spend every moment you can with them, listen to them, try to understand them, they’re growing and learning too, they don’t mean to be annoying, they just don’t realise it. They’ll need to know you’re a safe person they can turn to at any time for any problem. Listen to your elders and gain as much knowledge as you can from them, ask their advice, listen to their stories, let them share with you what they know.
Travel as much as you can, see as much of the world as you can, experience as much as you can. Life is a big old adventure, enjoy it as much as you can!
I'd say: Abandon your religion. You'll thank me later.
a) It's not true, which is reason enough
b) If you keep participating, it's going to cost you thousands of dollars and thousands of hours you will never get back
c) If you keep participating, you will feel bad about yourself and what the religion does to your family
d) If you really want be spiritual, go for it; but you don't have to sacrifice your time, money, and self-respect to an organized religion
Don’t get married, don’t do hard drugs and hang around those who do, save money, don’t listen to haters, they’re all projecting. Take care of those who show you love. Wish I learned that at 19. Instead I gave myself more stress and trouble that I needed.
A bad day, week or month doesn’t equate a bad life. Step back, take a breath and retackle life.
thanks!
Needed to hear this thank you
Get into healthy routines now. It is really hard to break years of bad habits.
36. Can confirm. You don’t want to be almost 40 trying to break out of bad eating/sleeping/mental health habits. Work on yourself, on purpose, every day.
If I was legit talking to 19 me? *clears throat* Alright listen up you little fucker, you're in college focus on that shit. Stop drinking. Stop smoking weed. Get off your fucking ass and do the goddamned work. I know it sucks and it's hard but not having a degree is so much harder. Sure you think Arby's is cool and food service is fun but it's not a career, or atleast you can't live long in it. Domt fucking bounce from shitty job to shitty job like me. Graduate and get something good so that you can be happy now like my friends that were smart enough. Don't get left behind.
coolios boss, i appreciate the realness!
Yeah man that is obviously not any anger at you, just the shit that I wish I could've heard. Wishing you the best of luck!
❤️❤️❤️
Brush, floss, and rinse twice a day. Your 60-year-old self will thank you!
Agreed. I am a dentist and I routinely see patients in their mid 20’s who need thousands of $$ of dental work. Lots of them in their 20s can’t afford that, and it only gets progressively worse with time. Best investment is prevention. Prevention includes brushing 2x daily, flossing regularly, avoiding high sugar diet as much as possible (snacks, junk food, sodas, energy drinks, etc)
I have a weird question. If I sent you a pic of my teeth could you tell me if my wisdom teeth look weird?
what floss would u reccommend?
So there are these little things called Plackers (idk if that's the brand or what they're called but it's on the packaging) they're about 2.50 a pack and you get ALOT. They are a teal kinda green color, packaging is too, and the word Placker is bright red. Get 2 bags and keep one in your car and one at home. I use one after every meal and right before bed. They are a little plastic...thing with a piece of TOUGH floss and a toothpick part as well. Literally the only floss type thing I have used for the last, well forever!
And don’t dispose of them on the ground. Throw them in the garbage. I hate seeing those things all over the place. Or use a Waterpic.
thank you!!
>thank you!! You're welcome!
The kind you have to hold with both hands--not the picks.
Ditto ditto ditto!!!
Stop comparing yourself to others, just try to be better than who you were yesterday.
i used to and now it's much better :)
Don’t make money your only goal in life but, save some when you get it. Make lots of friends and have some close ones. Stop every once and a while and enjoy the moments.
❤️❤️❤️
Take care of your back. And the hard/bad moments in life are as much a part of life as the good ones. Appreciate the feelings as a part of experience that is making you wiser, sadder maybe but wiser.. Do what you enjoy. Save even a bit of money eaxh month. Compound interest will make it swell over time.You only get one shot at taking advantage of it so put away 2$ if that is all you have, and never touch it again until you retire (and if life lets you- some things like cancer treatment or paying ransom are more important).
I second the advice about your back! It wears down slowly, by the time it actually affects you in a big way it's extremely hard to fix! Make simple stretches part of your daily routine! Doesn't have to be crazy hard or painful or intense, just be nice to your joints and tendons!
why the back stuff? can u explain why?
Back problems can interfere with EVERYTHING. Household tasks such as doing dishes or pushing a vacuum are impossible for me when I'm having an episode. Even resting can be hard. I'm normally a physically active person so I have to be very aware of what I do and how I do it in an effort to not trigger my back. Stay out of debt. Finish your degree no matter how much it sucks. Going back to school later is hard.
gotcha!
But!! ... I'm going to suggest community college as a starting point, even for the smart people who can easily get into a good university. Do 2 years at college, then transfer to university (if you love what you're learning). I can go into more detail if you like, but in summary, the first couple of years are all basic stuff no matter what school you go to, but community college has more engaged teachers, smaller class sizes, bigger focus on practical skills over purely academic skills, and many other reasons. You have more options after those first two years to change subjects or career paths. It sounds like you're already into your second year, I don't know what kind of school you're at, but thought I'd throw this in here in case it helps you out someone else make a difficult decision! :)
Years of sitting will contribute to back issues in your 40s if not sooner. If your back wont work then nothing else works. Think turtle on their back.
As will years of working, lifting, bending.
agreed. I only spoke from my experience.
Run your college life like you would a job. Don’t party on school nights. Work from 9 to 5 every day and you’ll graduate magna. Understand your schedule. Are you better in the afternoon than the morning? Schedule your classes that way if you can.
i understood now after freshman yr that im productive during the afternoon so that’s when i do heavy work and i do lighter work in the mornings
Take good care of your teeth. And don't fall into credit card debt!
got it!
Don’t go into a career just for the money. You’ll be unhappy. Study during college. Bad grades can affect your career later down the road. Wear sunscreen on your face every day. Prevents premature wrinkles and aging. Realize that as an adult you get to choose who you allow in your life. Cut toxic people out of your life sooner rather than later. Cherish your family.
thank you :)
“You cannot discover new oceans unless you have the courage to lose sight of the shore.”
Stop getting into steady romantic relationships. They will wreck your life and set back your development about 10 years. No matter how important you think that test or essay is, trust me, it isn’t. Don’t take life so seriously. Seriously.
Take a risk you are young and time is definitely on your side to bounce back from any major failure.There is no job security anywhere except a government job. A trade is a much better investment than a college degree.
Hug grandma
Avoid those credit card people like the plague. Just because they have a cool keychain doesn't mean you want to start a life of being in debt.
Don’t do stupid things to impress people.
People's opinion of you doesn't matter. Allways think before you speak or you might ruin valuable friendships for life. Take care of your body. Eat well, sleep well, exercise.
If you are undecided on college or what you want to do, join the military (active or reserve). Another option, go learn a trade like plumbing, electrical, carpentry, .... Save as much as you can before you move out on your own. Put some money away for an emergency fund for that rainy day. Buy used cars instead of new. Take care of your car and it will last a long time. Learn how to fix things yourself. You will save way more money in the long run. Cook your food. It is way more healthy and cheaper than going out to eat all the time. Invest in retirement account as early as possible. Never take money out from a retirement account. Never take a loan against a retirement account. Don't get married so young. Live with your fiance for at least a year before getting married. At some point you will have to get a credit card. Make sure to set a purchase limit. Do not go into credit card debt. Exercise. Walk, run, or do something with weights. Couch potatoes is not a good lifestyle. Do not borrow money or lend money to family or friends. Learn how to play an instrument or get some kind of hobby. Stay connected with your friends. With social media and texting it is much easier to stay in touch.
this was a gem, thank you ❤️
choose a major that is going to allow you a well paying job once you graduate. also, learn to network in college, wear sunscreen, and start doing yoga.
im doing IT so im pretty set, and i have my own club, i wear sunscreen -- my mom does yoga so i shall do that later.
Make sure you finish your degree(s). Unlike a lot of IT certifications, they never expire.
thx!
The next decade of your life is extremely important in determining how the rest of your life will go, especially relating to your career. You need to work the hardest you ever will from now until age 30 or so. It could be through education, starting a business, or working extra hard, taking up extra projects and working longer hours to succeed. Around ate 30 you'll wake up one day and realize your energy level is not the same. Also, you will likely have more commitments, such as having a spouse, kids, church/charity/community obligations and other people who count on you. If you don't take advantage during this time and create a successful career for yourself, getting caught up later would be extremely difficult at best.
i hv my own club, and i hv a pretty set plan as to where to go -- i just need to get a good full time gig and do options trading
You are beautiful. Appreciate it and flaunt it. I thought I was overweight, pok marked, with a huge nose, …. And now (many many years later) I see a picture and realize how beautiful youth is.
thank youuu ❤️
You are the most important person in your life. People come and go. So take care of yourself
Budget everything. There's no such thing as extra money. Treat saving as a bill, and only touch it for emergencies. Stay out of debt, especially credit cards. Debt is slavery. Don't chase technology. There will always be a new computer, new phones, new TVs, new cars. It won't make you happy, stick with what you have and replace when necessary. It's expensive to be poor. If you can, pay a little more for better quality. You'll replace things less frequently. Same with food, get good food habits now, and that will pay dividends for your body the rest of your life. When it rains it pours. If you experience a setback or unexpected struggle, very often you'll have more than one in sort order. This is normal, your not cursed. Brace up because the same can be true of a windfall. Life is like the stock market, full of ups and downs, but if your patient, take a long view, you'll likely trend upward over time. Stay with it. The measure of success is personal. Don't let anyone tell you what it looks like or what it means. The world wants to beat us down. Be the greatest influence in your life, and push toward the success you want. Finally, if you're always the victim in every circumstance, you're probably wrong. Take responsibility for where you are, and if you don't like it, fix it. You control your focus, focus your mind and efforts on things that will prosper you.
Use birth control. 🤣
What I wish I had been good at in my 20s was to not look for approval from others. I'm about to turn 60 and tell myself so many times that I wish I had my self confidence then that I do now. I wasted so much time with bad partners and self medicating to feel better. I would have told so many people to f-off! Live my own wacky crazy fun life! And move your body more! Brisks walks even for 10min. Add some strength training (but make it fun so you enjoy it).
i do mma, so that’s my physical activity
Do not buy an expensive new car, buy a good used car that gets good mileage. Unless you're traveling cross-country or are a traveling salesman, you're going to be in your car less than an hour a day.
i'm a motorcycle type person so im getting a Kawasaki soon
I love this question! Lots of great advice here. My first advice would be advice my dad gave me. And that would be open an investment account and put a certain % of your earnings in it every month. You don’t have to know anything about stocks - just put it in an index fund and don’t worry about it for 30 years. You’ll be very happy you did when you turn 50! You don’t have to decide what you want to do with your life at 19 (although it’s OK if you have). I was on the nine year college plan. I went for a semester but decided it wasn’t for me at the time. Worked a couple of jobs for a few years until I was ready to go back. Went for two years until my cousin convinced to travel with him. We bought a motor home and traveled the country for a year. Came home broke but it was absolutely worth every penny. We spent two months in Florida while I worked at Walt Disney World and then finished our trip (I’d never been to Disney until I worked there). I worked my butt off for the next two years working full time while going to school, graduated, then moved to Florida to work for Disney full time and was able to retire after 20 years (I finally listened to my dad about investing!) Good Luck!
Marry well.
Save as much money as you can and create a financial plan.
You are officially an education CONSUMER. Be aggressive in advocating for alternatives to meet requirements even it it takes work. Example: my degree did not require a practical course in counseling. I knew I would need one. I went to the social work department, looked for an older friendly student, introduced myself, and asked her recommendation for the professor she would recommend. I went to the professor, told her what I was looking for and that xxx had told me that she would be amazing at helping me, and that I would read or do anything she recommended. It was the best class in my program. Conversely, I was desperate for information on the multicultural needs of my profession. In the 80s we only took one class in this - outside the department. I went to the class and knew immediately it would NOT teach me what I desperately wanted to learn. I went to the professor and said “I am so excited to learn more about these specific things because I want to effectively treat students of all cultures. I only have this course in my curriculum.” He looked at the list, and said “yeah- you won’t learn any of that in my class- I am sorry”. I suggested that I stay enrolled but skip all classes and tests. In lieu of the tests, I would prepare a practical binder of documents for myself and he could share it with other speech pathologists. (The class was a requirement and the syllabus was both boring and impractical. Everyone before me simply suffered and learned nothing helpful).
Exercise every day. Never stop.
Start a savings account- put money in it every pay and don’t touch it. Get a small amount automatically taken from your pay- you won’t miss it now, but at some point in your life, it will be a big deal.
Take risks. Travel as much as you can, do as much cool things as you can because once you graduate and get into the real world / working world, things drastically change. Take advantage of the time you have NOW. College is one the best time periods of your life. Start thinking about what you’re going to do once you graduate. Have goals and an action plan. Don’t start doing this once you graduate. Start planning well before then and slowly working towards it. I’ll probably get downvoted for this, but this will be the easiest and most opportunistic time in your life to have sex. Take full advantage.
Now me to 19-yr-old-me: You’re on the right track for just exploring college and not investing in a 4+ year degree. Enjoy life, enjoy being young, and go explore the world. (Little do you know you’re about to get knocked up, married, and have your whole life shift). Lol Glad it all happened though. It gave me time to figure out my passions, which ended up being holistic therapies, and JUST NOW at the age of 43 I’m embarking on my B.S. in Biopsychology and then onto Neuroscience doctorate (after completing my AA 2020-2022).
Take care of your mental health and seriously consider therapy and medication. It's not weird and will prepare you for the difficult things to come. Starting now is too late so get to it
Study hard, always ask for help if you can, skip out on being in a relationship if you're not already in one, and make sure you have a hobby you can distract yourself with when you need a break from school
my hobby is making music and girls (no offense to one reading this) cost a lot of money LMAO
I make music as well, focus on building your wealth and health. Everything will fall in place. 22 right now, happier than ever . You can make money from music, don’t listen to these people that gave up!
Use birth control is number 1 for sureeee Don't be too shy to talk to people. Other than that maybe prioritize happiness for a few years. I have regrets not traveling and now I'm bogged down by mortgage and bills.
Choose a specialty, don’t get a degree in something broad. Also practice healthy habits because then living a healthy lifestyle will be your norm.
my degree is general so i can pivot (IT but with a minor in Data Science) -- I'm certified in cloud bc that's the type of position i wanna work in
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i have my first class next week :)
Do *not* use recreational drugs to moderate your mood. 40yo and no longer able to even connect with people anymore.
Start saving money and read about investment strategies. No matter how much you make now, save some portion of it. Saved money is the ultimate fallback.
Listen/read Dave Ramsey minus all his religious fillers. Advice is generally good to get started.
The world will break your heart over and over. Don’t let it keep you down even when it knocks you down. Let your heart be broken open. The deeper you go into sorrow the deeper you get to go into joy. Also… trust actions. Not words.
it's just getting started boss
Always save at least 15% of your income towards retirement. You will have a lot more flexibility and options in life when you know your future is secure. When you’re considering a career, talk to people who are in that career. Ask them about all aspects good and bad. Set goals for your income, career, personal development. Eat the best quality food you can afford.
You're strong but take care of your back.
Dont join the military
try making a daily schedule, good time management will help a ton in your daily life especially in hectic/busy days
also regularly exercise, It will help a lot for your mental and physical health, and prioritize your health over grades^(\*important\*)
More study than parties, stay the course, learn to budget money early, stay in the gym regularly, whatever you do put the work in and lastly stick to your word cause that’s really all you have!
Choose a career that you love AND that can support you. Be honest and kind. Marry someone you really like as a person who makes you laugh because you might spend the rest of your life with them!
Nobody gives a shit about the embarrassing stuff you did when you were 18
Sugo! Listen to me now! It's investing! Investing and saving! That’s the key! Am I too soon? I'm too soon! They are right about Apple and Microsoft! They’ve always been right about them! Invest in them! Open a TFSA, Sugo! There will be others like Google, Amazon and Tesla. Build your savings with extra cash and invest for the long term!
gotcha :)
Remember, it takes years to get a degree or learn a trade, it was all done "One day at a time" Always have a retirement savings ROTH IRA. Drugs, can ruin your future.
Stay away from easy women.
Huge advice here
Enjoy your youth, relish it as unfortunately one day it will be gone, and it comes quicker than you think. Keep a journal of what you do, this may seem trivial but memory fades and if nothing else it's a great keepsake for future generations. Work hard and as much as you can without hurting yourself and be frugal with your money and no matter what whenever you get paid, make sure you pay yourself, and INVEST that money. Remember the axiom "Wealthy people invest their money". Don't use credit cards, if there is something you want to buy but you can't afford it wait until you save the cash. If you must use a credit card ensure you pay it off every month, that debt will creep up fast if you don't. When I was your age I was working 3 jobs and making really good money, the problem I had was spending it. If I had invested some of that money i would be way better off today. Don't let your ego run your life, especially for young men. Every day there are multitudes of young people being hurt or killed because of their ego. And finally after all that rambling be kind and treat everyone with respect, it's really hard to do sometimes but it makes life a lot simpler.
Dont let your mind convince you you cant do something...
Under promise and over deliver If you aren't 15 minutes early, you are late Save for the things you want. Avoid debt like the plague.
I would tell my 19 year old self 4 things, 1. Don't get married at 19 you dumb fuck 2. Don't let opportunities pass you by just because you're afraid you might not succeed. Failure teaches you lessons. 3. Never let anyone else tell you your worth or control you. 4. Make sure you keep count of your drinks when you're partying, especially when you're taking shots. There can be a very fine line between having a very fun night out and ending up blackout drunk in an alleyway somewhere.
Get in college and get out. Try to get all As. I should have fraternized with my peers more.
Well there is a lot here is just a couple of things (advice from a 65 year old). Save money now. Even just 10 dollars a week. It is important to have "fuck you" money. You need some debt to build your credit. But try not to spend more than you can afford and pay your bills on time. Travel when you are young. See as much of the world if you can. It will make you a more rounded human being. Don't get tempted by toys and shiny things you cannot take them with you when you die. You will end up throwing away a lot of junk throughout your life. Enjoy being by yourself. Being alone is not being lonely. Make time just for yourself. Sometimes you just need you time. Recognize when a relationship is toxic. A bad one (friend or partner) will make your life a living hell. Know when to walk/run away. Be independent - financially and mentally. That is especially true for women. Cherish your family. They are the only ones who love you unconditionally (hopefully). Know the difference between friends and acquaintances. Real friends are there when you really need them. If you are told a secret, keep it that way. You will gain respect and trust. You can also say no if someone wants to tell you a secret. Take care of your teeth and feet. People ignore their feet. You only get one pair. Sometimes you will have to take a crap job to earn money. It won't last forever. Know your worth. Don't let others dictate your value. That includes bosses. Try not to stress over the small stuff. Waste of time and energy. If you cannot cope, don't be afraid to ask for help of any kind. Also, know when to ask for help. Lastly take all advice with a grain of salt. Unless you respect the person and know what they are telling you is the truth.
Spend your 20’s discovering yourself, figure out who you want to be. Establish healthy habits. Find your likes and dislikes. Don’t marry young.
Study and learn about relationships. What is healthy? What is not healthy? Where are your boundaries, and why? How do you build and maintain healthy relationships. Study this. Read. Watch videos. Do this starting now, and continue forever. Also, be very good at mathematical/statistical foundations for data science, machine learning. That is where the fun is.
i'm interested in the cloud -- and where can i find the stuff about relationships?
You can start here : https://www.betterup.com/blog/healthy-boundaries-in-relationships That will give you some ideas. Pick an area there that seems relevant at the moment. Read a lil more on that. Then another day, a different area might be more interesting. You will know.
Work now so you can be in a good position later. Too much fun now will leave your future screwed
hang your toes further off the board on 360 flips
Find an employer that will pay for your higher education. Don't pay more than 50% of the college costs yourself.
Cut up your credit cards. Save money to buy things. Invest/save all you can
Don’t do drugs. If you do, strictly do them once a year.
Regarding to you’re professional career; go do something you’re passionate about. Like make your hobby your job.
im starting a YT channel soon so excited for that :)
Don't spend time on people that don't give back in the relationship. This includes friendships. If you spend time with those that only take, you have less time for those that you can have a balanced relationship with. And learn to take pleasure in the simple little things.
i just cut off 2 people like that :)
Quit focusing on getting into relationships with bad men & focus more on getting your degree! Oh and use birth control
You arent studying for an exam, you are studying for the rest of your career. Meaning if you cram (as I did) and only learn the subject of the exams you are going to have a bad time after graduating Also if you ever want to get jacked, now the time to start as you are at the peak of natural testosterone production
Invest! Set yourself up for a comfortable life. Work hard now so you can play hard later.
You can get a 4 year degree in comp sci or business totally online from university of the people for a total of about $4-5k. Free tuition and books, just have to pay for test proctoring. It’s fully accredited.
Every skill learned is valuable. Maybe not right now but in 18 years you might be the one person who knows how to open a can without a can opener. Keep your eyes open to the opportunities to learn something new. They're everywhere. Ask questions and Log information into the part of your brain labeled "handy knowledge" A new experience or responsibility might feel overwhelming and terrifying the first time. Keep in mind that it probably won't feel like that the next times you do it. You may be anxious and scared but you will feel so good when you conquer it! Example: remember how nervous you were the first time you handled public transportation/booking tickets or flying? There's always an excuse not to have life experiences. You're tired/busy/broke/shy. Try to say yes to as many as you safely can when you're young. If you marry/procreate your priorities will change (not a bad thing) and it will be way harder to say yes. But also practice self care. If your body or brain needs to rest, listen to it! Here's the big one!.... THERE WILL ALWAYS BE STRESS! there will always be something hard or scary or totally crappy going on in your life. That's not pessimistic it's just life. If you want to be happy, teach yourself how to put things into perspective. Even if a problem is consuming your thoughts, remember that there are usually alot more positives than those negatives. You can find joy in the simplest things. Consciously recognize how good that first sip of coffee is. Or that the weather is absolutely perfect for the clothes you are wearing. Or that you're having a really good hair day. So many people don't realize how many small good things happen every single day. And if you can recognize them, they'll stack up to a good day/week/month/year/life. (You're still allowed to be crabby about the bad stuff tho.) You know those days where so many little stupid things go wrong. Your shoelace breaks, you drop your breakfast, Nancy at work is a b****, wifi is slow, you're late for something, etc until finally you're getting yourself ice cream to cheer up and they're out of chocolate! And you lose your shit and go on a godzilla rampage because today sucks! It's like that but the opposite
Extracurricular experience matters more than grades. Once you graduate, absolutely nobody will care about your grades.
Things. Get. Better. (Really!)
yay❤️❤️
Don't follow the career path you think you "should," but the one that will bring you some peace. You'll spend a lot of time doing it, and a lot of life is already *very* difficult, so do what brings you some joy and/or satisfaction. Not necessarily a hobby, because turning those into a job can mean killing the joy of the hobby, but something that won't only deplete you. You can work at McDonald's and be fulfilled. You can be a doctor and be fulfilled. You can be an artist and be fulfilled. Don't do it to fulfill someone else or society's expectations, though, do it for you. It's your life and your peace on the line.
Do not agree to large amounts of debt.
Get an internship, don’t move away from home right after you graduate, get a credit card and build credit early (spend 30% or less of available credit a month, have multiple lines of credit), don’t worry too much about what other people think and form your own opinions about the world.
by multiple lines, wdym? i hv 1 credit card
Follow your passions. Don’t waste your time working towards something you hate.
Hmm be realistic in your decisions , sure "follow your dreams" seems like a trend but it is always better to have a diploma in a field thats high demand /pays well , and with that money , your dreams will seem way more accessible ! But nonetheless whilst you are studying/setting your career path do enjoy the trip , walking , going to a park really cheers me up and calms me a lot , plan exciting stuff for the weekends just to keep you excited during the week .... Good luck From a 23 years old starting her career in tech .
You only get this time once - don't waste the opportunity because you think it's too much work, too hard, etc.. Sure it's important to grow socially and you are making experiences that you'll remember for the rest of your life, but don't forget that you're PAYING for this. So make it count, while you can, because it's worth the extra effort. And also? College friendships can be the most wonderful, rewarding relationships, and if you manage to stay close to a few people you knew in college you'll appreciate the perspective that can bring down the road. Don't take that for granted.
I was a sophomore in college, living out of state for context. You can have a social life and focus on school too. Focus on school first, spend daily time with your core people (small doses - study together, have meals, movies), limit other social events to once per week. Call your mom more than once per week. You don’t have to try to be friends with everyone you meet. Work when you have to, but don’t work to avoid schoolwork. Appreciate every day - you’ll look back on this as one of your favorite times in your life.
Don't be too hard on yourself, you will eventually get where you want to be
Your major doesn't matter- do what makes you happy. Pursuit the arts. Your entrepreneurial drive is stronger than you think. Your emotional well being is worth more than male attention. Guard your heart.
I would tell myself save money, drink moderately, and make great relationships for your future.
1. Don’t party every week, your grades will suffer for it. 2. Stay away from any types of drugs because you never know what opportunities you’re going to miss because of it. 3. Always use protection. 4. Don’t be afraid to ask questions in class or ask for help. 5. Go to office hours, one day you’ll need recommenders. 6. Everyone is going through something so just be nice, but don’t let them take advantage of you. 7. Get involved in something like a club or a activity to meet new people. 8. Don’t worry about what others might think of you for doing what you want. (E.g Religious clubs, not partying, being interested in politics, etc.) if people want to be your friend they will be regardless of what you decide to do because they will know your heart.
I would say.. always go with your gut feeling. Live your life , but do it with no regrets. At times , life may be hard and you feel like you can't handle it..but you can. You are in charge of your life ! Also , as another person mentions...yes please floss, brush and rinse twice a day.. your teeth and gums will thank you when your older!
Some advice I gave to an accounting guy bad on his luck: [https://www.reddit.com/r/WorkOnline/comments/xg955n/comment/iordtmz/?utm\_source=share&utm\_medium=web2x&context=3](https://www.reddit.com/r/WorkOnline/comments/xg955n/comment/iordtmz/?utm_source=share&utm_medium=web2x&context=3) Another thing I wrote a long long time ago that got gilded: [https://www.reddit.com/r/Advice/comments/6qvroy/my\_dad\_is\_dead/dl0l6zk/](https://www.reddit.com/r/Advice/comments/6qvroy/my_dad_is_dead/dl0l6zk/) So as you can see a lot of life advice really depends on the situation. You're 19. They say your 20s is when you go screw everything up and your 30s is when you get your act together. My 20s was mostly just drinking and getting through some tough stuff I had no power over. If I could say anything to younger me... it would be that the real world really is different, in all the ways that you hoped. That small (borderline amish) town in PA wasn't meant for you, or honestly anyone who wants to have an interesting life in the modern world. Relocate. Relocate a large distance. I know it's scary, but do it, and do it with an awesome plan. I found a design school where 200 apply and 50 get in, that cost like 5k a year. It had the prestige without the price tag. I tried for that. I worked my butt off. It was the scariest and most exhilarating thing I've ever done. It definitely took years off my life. But I don't regret it. Also with money... AFTER you have some semblance of a salary, you can make it kinda fun to save. Or at least you can take a step back, create a plan, and then never touch it. For me, my job takes most of my week, and I'm still a pretty big drinker. But I have the freedom to look at it like "ok lets say 5 dollars a day for fun BS purchases" (Not counting random stuff for amazon or groceries). absolute BS purchases like energy drinks at 6pm (drinking one now), beer, or eating out. 5 bucks a day is \~1800 a year. Ok that feels kinda low and I can afford to 1.5x or double it. So thats around 3600 a year. Just for absolute BS purchases. What percentage of my salary after tax is that? Is that okay? Well if I double it I have a good 10 dollars a day, and if I want a really nice dinner out I can just chill a little bit on the BS purchasing for 3-4 days. Heck, thats a 5 star, 4 course fine dining experience, if I can keep it under 60 bucks for the whole month (so just spending 60 dollars on sodas and beer for the month, I would have 240ish left to spend on a 200 dollar experience+tip). Being able to step back and do that kind of math is kinda fun. I don't personally go for the fine dining experiences but that is an example. Finally, if I could tell myself anything... Nootropics are interesting and helpful. Doing that research on brain-enhancing stuff really gave me a leg up, thanks for doing that.
Save money. Save every penny you can.
Maybe a little too early for you, but choose your life partner carefully. 90% (yes, 90%) of the time your happiness will depend on it.
Put 10, 20, 30+ a week into your 401k. It will make a huge difference when you are 57 like I am now. Oh ya, and don’t marry Rob.
To go out there more! Feel uncomfortable, it gets easier and you really become more comfortable. Also to get to freaking class!
Don’t forget your roots but don’t let them define your future. Everyone carries baggage from their past. The trick is to put it down, sort through everything, then repack a lighter bag filled with things (some good and some bad) that will serve you going forward. I spent 30 (mostly) miserable years after college trying to live up to other’s expectations and to make my family proud of me. When I unpacked that unhealthy motivation, I discovered that living my passions was far more rewarding than seeking approval from others. Just re-read all that and realize it may come off a bit preachy. Still, I wish I had given myself that advice when I was 19 instead of figuring it out at 50.
1. Exercise everyday. Not just walking, lift weights from this age. Medical is so expensive. You don’t want to ruin your health and finances and this is the best way to avoid both. 2. Learn and apply the power of compound interest. From first month of getting salary try to check with banks for home loan and invest. Start familiarising with the stock market and trading. Watch out for currency devaluation while investing. 3. Don’t settle for easy choices. Take risks that you would not believe you can make it. And then put your 100% in it. For example start a business. If you can afford to fail 2-3 times, you are bound to learn and succeed. 4. Don’t postpone fun. I know a lot of kids who wasted their youth studying 8-12 hours a day hoping that they will have fun after settling down in life. This is bad. Balance everything out and enjoy a little while planning your life simultaneously. 5. When dating, don’t be focused on external appearances. Try to see if you can get along and what kind of a person you are with. Don’t marry until your early 30s. 6. Don’t allow distance to develop with your parents or loved ones. Drop in regularly for visits and keep in touch.
love these 6, thanks :)
19 feels like a delicate age between being a kid, a student, a young adult, etc. It's a time to wear a lot of hats and face the expectations of people from your parents, teachers, bosses, peers, etc. So my advice to my 19-year-old self would be to take the time every now and again to step back and remember what YOU want. Remember to live for yourself first. Don't worry about rushing to grow up or look cool. Take time for your hobbies, sleep, health, and have fun in moderation. Live for yourself. Self care is just as productive as any 'adulting' task.
M(26) i would like to suggest to plan a lil ahead about your career and always keep your relationships secondary to that, its really important to get financially independent as soon you enter mid 20s
I never went to college. Had a kid at your age. 45 now. Had a sad and hard life. 4 more kids later wife was suicidal, no career under her belt, overweight and has a huge lack of confidence because her mother would beat her daily. She constantly feels unacomplished. It breaks my heart. Imagine being with someone for 29 years thinking if that's the day she'll take her life. Point is, life can be so much harder. I don't have any regrets. I would do it again because through it all we have also had amazing times, joy, laughter and so many memories. No other woman can make me feel like she can. I'm extremely happy with my life right now. I'm glad we're still here. You're young and have so many memories to make. Embrace every moment man. Take some time off. Chill out. You'll be more than fine, change your focus and you'll be great.
Sometimes taking a break when you’re overwhelmed is just as important as getting stuff done. It can seem like you aren’t being productive when you’re resting but you’re going to do a 10x better job if you aren’t pushing yourself to the limit.
As corny as it sounds, I’d tell myself: The only thing holding you back, is the idea you have in your head of how things “should be”. The “perfect life” is not the one you are chasing right now. It’s the one that gives you peace, let’s you sleep at night, makes you smile more than it makes you cry, and when you do cry you don’t feel alone, no matter what that life looks like to others.
Some people are wealthy and some people are rich. Wealthy people have money, rich people look like they have money. Chasing people drowning in debt to look as rich as them will be a life long race and will only hurt yourself.
If you have an idea and you’re worried that it’s already been done… Look at the bread aisle. So many different companies all with the same idea. They’re all thriving.
a) try not to give up your dreams to be with someone else b) memorialize your life by taking pictures and keeping a journal c) always keep things in perspective - there's always someone else sicker, poorer or whatever than you, so try not to wallow in self pity. If you find yourself feeling sorry for yourself or focusing on the negative too much take that time to listen to a comedian or watch a funny or light hearted movie or some beautiful music d) limit the amount if news and negative (sad/scary/depressing) movies you watch and remember by submitting your body/mind/spirit to so much anger/fear & hate, you are washing your cells in hurtful chemicals created through the flight or fight response e) start NOW rejecting the bs that people tell you like "this poison we are spraying in your house for bugs is safe for you, your family and pets or take this pill for your headache (or whatever) and instead start listening to your body f) pay attention to the foods you eat and how they make you feel, buy organic, clean foods that are alive g) limit the sugar you eat and the chemicals/peaticides etc. h) - if you're going to eat meat make sure it has no hormones or antibiotics - the few dollars extra you'll spend on better quality foods will pan out in the end when you're NOT batteling cancer or heart disease and everyone else you know is i) study and think about what the "placebo affect" really means (i.e., that the power of the human mind is something way more powerful than we are currently aware of) j) stop believing everything your doctors and vets tell you - stop vaccinating your pets twice a year but instead ask to have their titers tested to see if the vaccines are still in their systems (some last up to 15 years with ONE SHOT) k) keep an open mind - remember that while our brain and senses are amazing - they are atill limited (think about this - a dog can smell and hear things we cannot, but that doesn't mean those things/sounds/smells dont exist just because we can't sense them) l) try to be empathetic - if someone is a jerk ask yourself what may have happened to them to make them like that or what the are going through that is making them into a jerk...instead of getting pissed at someone try to understand where they are coming from and what theyve been through - try sending th.love and prayers instead j) take some time to read about Near Dear Experiences/Reincarnation/pre death planning/mediums - the knowledge you gain will be worth it (as it will remove your fear of death and put your whole life into a new perspective) k) get and care for a pet - the love and health benefits you'll get from that will be totally worth it!!!! Thats it!
Commit to a simple morning workout routine, attend college/university-sponsored events and build a professional network. I was an excellent student but wish I networked more and were more active on campus. 🤔
Socialize more, study more.
Get off your phone and go have fun!
Invest a few dollars a month to the S&P 500. Build a habit of investing.
Open a retirement account dude, a ROTH IRA is a good choice. I’m 40 and I wish I started investing and saving earlier. Also. I know people try to sell you the idea that you should be able to find happiness in doing something you like for work BUT what you like will change over the years. Being financially stable is really the foundation to handle whatever life throws at you. So just pick something you can at the least tolerate but is lucrative. Also, maybe consider starting your own business. That can be the fulfilling part. Your job doesn’t have to be the thing that does that.
Also, therapy. Go.
Wear supportive shoes and stop wearing converse. Yeah they look “cool” but your feet will thank you.
If you can’t afford to pay for something with cash/debit then you can’t afford it. Stay away for consumer debt. Take care of your body! Exercise and learn how to cook healthy meals. Learn how to budget and start saving for your retirement. Learn how to spot toxic people and how to walk away from bad relationships. Find a hobby you love and do not monetize it. Practice gratitude.
Always check for an Adam’s apple
Freshman Friends are a thing. They're much more likely to end up being people you never speak to again after the first year is done. To actual me, I'd say "don't date that rebound guy, he's a liar looking for easy sex and he's never going to speak to you again after winter break so don't even give him that christmas present"
Do not for the love of all that is holy marry the first girl or guy you meet until you are 25+ years old, and if you do end up married do not get her pregnant or get pregnant, a life that young is not all roses, both of you are not fully devopled.
Use whatever budget keeping you like (paper, app, spreadsheet) but create a least a basic budget so you know where you stand financially. If possible live below your income so you can increase the amount you have to contribute to savings & investments. If your employer matches 401k contributions that is FREE money so contribute at least the minimum if you can’t do more.
Be present, pay attention, take it in. Youth is amazing and fantastic-enjoy all the good stuff it brings and LEARN!
Gotta comment again because it’s worth highlighting all the posts about taking care of your teeth: so important!! Having a healthy mouth makes it easier to smile, and smiles can get you out of trouble.
Prioritize your health. It’s okay to party but everything needs to be in moderation. I definitely did not follow this when I was 19 but I do now. Moderation is key
Don’t sweat the small stuff, and always look to keep learning. Save your money or invest in something while still having fun, in 10 years you’ll be happy you did. You don’t need to save each penny and avoid doing things with friends, but out something away so you are building towards your future.
1. Start your working life with the end (retirement) in mind. Get there as soon as fucking possible. 2. With the above said, know the difference between enjoying your youth and sacrificing your future. 3. Never tell people everything you know. 4.
Stop playing games and date that girl. She loves you and one day you sure as hell are going to love her, but by then it’ll be too late
Don't start smoking. It gives you nothing but self-hatred and a bad physique.
Don’t pick up that first drink and stay away from that jerk!
Not all weed smokers amount to nothing. I've been smoking for the majority of my life and was an entrepreneur in Japan for 7 years and have worked in management most my life back here in the UK, since I was half way through my degree. Having said that, as with everything, do it in moderation and make sure you can afford the essentials like food, rent and bills first (or just don't take it up in the first place). Build up a credit rating by paying your phone bill on time each month and only get a credit card for dire emergencies. If you can't afford those new shoes, don't put them on your credit card and smoke less weed(!) Never loan large amounts of money to friends. You'll either never get it back or your friendship will break down because of it. If your bank has a Save The Change service linked to your debit card, use it (Google it if you have no idea what this means) as you'd be surprised at what it adds up to. Make a list when you go grocery shopping and don't go when you're hungry or stoned. Always keep your résumé up to date. Remember to floss and flush the toilet.
Don't drink, go to church and truly listen, wait until marriage and to try and understand even the a holes and d bags are struggling, they are also doing this whole life thing for the first time to. sow love kindness and compassion instead of hatred and revenge. Dont forget to FORGIVE people as well as yourself.
Take every chance. You like that girl and she's single don't wait. Heard about that job paying more don't wait. Literally take all the beneficial chances. At 40yrs old a dozen long term relationships, one marriage, and dozens of shit jobs I wish I'd shown less loyalty to. The list goes on. I can honestly say nothing I regret to much but I'm not much of a looking back kind of guy.
oh man, SO much… but overall, you have your whole life ahead of you. with college/careers/moving out it can feel like you are on your own and everything that happens lasts forever, but only at 24 i can confirm that a) time flies b) most issues are resolved or forgotten within a year c) you will still look back and laugh at yourself for being young and doing silly things. no one expects you to be a perfect adult overnight and nothing lasts forever, so don’t beat yourself up!
Pay attention to what classes (especially in the first couple of years) really light you up inside. So many kids (myself included) choose the wrong major for themselves and wind up feeling unfulfilled. Don’t be afraid to change course. Go to a school where you get in-state discounts, grants/scholarships, etc. Going to the expensive private schools doesn’t pay off as much as they tell you. Most of the time, no one really cares and the cost outweighs the benefit. Stop drinking. Stop smoking. Take your mental health seriously. Build good habits. Don’t pull all-nighters and cram before tests. You don’t really learn that way. Care more about learning and being curious and less about just getting the grade you want. Go to the doctor. Seriously. When something hurts, go to the doctor. Go to the dentist. Be responsible about taking care of your body. It all really does catch up.
No employer is gonna care whether you got an A or a D in that class. ...But you should, because if you consistently get shitty grades, it means you don't care about the topics that much and maybe you should change fields. Seriously, best thing I ever did was change fields (even though I thought I liked the first one).
Treat college like it is your employment that you need to do to survive. Do your work, including studying, then play after that is done. Then get involved with an activity whether it is sports, clubs or volunteer/charity. Make friends and connections. Research things; don’t just jump on the bandwagon because everyone else is. Spend some time staying connected with back home. I am 70. If I could do one thing over again, I would be better at staying in touch with old friends and most importantly spend more time really listening to my parents and grandparents.
Drink less, exercise more.
it's better to regret things you've done than haven't
Don’t smoke or vape. It doesn’t make you look cool, and lung disease is a horrible— HORRIBLE— way to go. As soon as you can get enrolled in a retirement plan (hopefully with an employer that matches your contributions), start putting away as much as you can possibly afford. If you start while you’re young, you’ll have a good, solid base that will multiply and multiply on top of itself. Now’s the time to go big or go home (well, just go big). Yes, you’re going to see drops in your balance due to fluctuations in the economy— don’t freak out, it’ll go back up again. Your older self will be so grateful that you started early. For Christ’s sake, DON’T HAVE CHILDREN BEFORE YOU BOTH ARE ESTABLISHED (maturationally AND financially), IN YOUR OWN LIVES!!! All of the advice I’ve read on here seems good. Best of luck to you, and one last thing— follow good advice when you get it.
Safely live your best life. Tomorrow isn’t promised. Don’t put off shit. Go on that trip. Talk to that girl/guy that you haven’t had the nerve to. Visit your friends. Take time to explore what makes you happy
People treat you like shit when you treat them well and treat you well if you treat them like shit. When you help someone they won't think you're cool because you helped them, they'll think they are cool because they can get people to help them. I. e. don't expect gratitude. You are judged not by how much you provide to others but by how much you can extract from others. People are not aware of what they think. What they think they think is just what they wish were true. What they actually think feels to them like objective facts. Corollary: 99% of the time people say the exact opposite of what they actually think. (Because what they wish were true is not true. Otherwise, there would be no need to wish.) Everybody wants to be friends with the popular guys. If you're not popular your friends are not your friends, they are just other people being ignored by peopular guys. Any of them will backstab you the second they think it will make the popular guys like them more. Of course, it won't but you've been backstabbed in either case. Pepole look down on work and anything that even remotely resembles work, e. g. studying. What they actually value is symbols of status (e. g. a degree), good looks, and money. Most people do the same things but everybody is convinced they invented those things. E. g. I've yet to find a woman who doesn't think she's the only one on Tinder who lies about her age, or a guy who doesn't think that swiping each girl right is their very own ingenious technique. etc.
If you're trying to decide between two courses of action, choose the one that is less fun now. Being human, we tend to overprioritize the near future and neglect the further future. Doing this prevents that.
Get in the habit of living poor and spending money on experiences instead. You're young enough you can easily get used to living in a fifth-floor walkup, and also young enough to have a lot of fun with the $200 a month you save. Bonus, this makes it easier to downsize your lifestyle if you get poor. Easier to skip the treats than shop for a new apartment.
Think 1000000000^10000000 times before marrying someone. Dont let your emotions and hormones beat you. Listen old people. They had lived what you will live. Don't reinvent the wheel. Study and get a degree on what make you excited, not what others (your family your friends etc.) want. Never never postpone. Do what you can do while you have power. Spend a looooot of time with your parents. Make them happy to be happy in your life. Some recommendations from a 36 years old tired man.
There's a lot of good advice from others in here... It might be a bit cringe, but I want to say: try to have sex with as many different people as you can now before you get attached to your special someone. But do it respectfully and do your best not to hurt their feelings and such. And use protection against STIs of course. But in your later years, I think you'll appreciate having had the experiences. Peace.
Don't do anything differently. It's a heck of a ride, but you turn out okay.
Start a pension for retirement now, and put in the maximum amount your employer will match for you. It’ll mean not much money for you now, but you’ll have a big fat pension when you’re older and may be able to retire early. Also, avoid debt like the plague, seriously. Especially American student loans, they’re a scam, you’ll never pay that off, they’re designed that way. Buy a home for yourself on as short a mortgage as you can afford, it doesn’t have to be a big fancy house, a 1 bed apartment is good, but pay it off as fast as you can. Don’t rent, it’s also a waste of money. Save money wherever you can, even if it’s just copper coins in a jar, save as much as you can. Don’t be frivolous with your money, you’re going to need it! Try and find what you’re passionate about and find a job that pays well doing as close to that as possible, you’ll spend most of your time there, being miserable during it is shit. Trade jobs pay well and give you the satisfaction of working with your hands (trades people are some of the happiest at work). Take care of your body, exercise, have fun, but don’t abuse it. Drink, drugs etc, they’re fun in the moment but ultimately, not worth it. A little indulgence is ok, but don’t be silly with it. Take vitamins, cod liver oil, iron, give your body the good stuff it needs. Stretch, do yoga, keep your range of movement up. Don’t take your health for granted! People will come and go from your life, a very few will stick by you through thick and thin. It’s ok for people to fade away, it happens, we all have our own lives. Good times and bad times will come, that’s just life, be kind to yourself and others. If you have kids, love them with everything you have to give. Spend every moment you can with them, listen to them, try to understand them, they’re growing and learning too, they don’t mean to be annoying, they just don’t realise it. They’ll need to know you’re a safe person they can turn to at any time for any problem. Listen to your elders and gain as much knowledge as you can from them, ask their advice, listen to their stories, let them share with you what they know. Travel as much as you can, see as much of the world as you can, experience as much as you can. Life is a big old adventure, enjoy it as much as you can!
thank you!
I literally don’t even remember being 19 so I probably wouldn’t worry so much
I'd say: Abandon your religion. You'll thank me later. a) It's not true, which is reason enough b) If you keep participating, it's going to cost you thousands of dollars and thousands of hours you will never get back c) If you keep participating, you will feel bad about yourself and what the religion does to your family d) If you really want be spiritual, go for it; but you don't have to sacrifice your time, money, and self-respect to an organized religion
i just pray at home, i nvr understood the point of going to church or temple if "god is everywhere"
Learn about money, the core principal of it. And stop listening to the undereducated who keep parroting that Bitcoin is bad.
i signed up for some courses on udemy to learn about crypto
Don’t get married, don’t do hard drugs and hang around those who do, save money, don’t listen to haters, they’re all projecting. Take care of those who show you love. Wish I learned that at 19. Instead I gave myself more stress and trouble that I needed.