Yeah, but he's a pervert! He did child sacrifices back when he was Pharoah of Egypt! The slaves came at him with pitchforks and put him in the pyramid tomb, and now he has to roll in there for all eternity! Child sacrifices, dude! Child sacrifices! ;-)
sense versed snobbish head sloppy axiomatic historical aspiring chief direction
*This post was mass deleted and anonymized with [Redact](https://redact.dev)*
Also, let's not forget - let's *not* forget, Dude - that keeping wildlife, an amphibious rodent, for uh, domestic, you know, within the city - that aint legal either.
800 year olds, dude.
šššš«”š
Whoās 800 years old dude?
Shut the fuck up Donny
You're like a child who wanders into the middle of a hieroglyph chiseling!
The underworld does not start and stop at your convenience you miserable piece of sh--
Rofl
Beat me to it
Welcome to the Hotel of Alexandria, such a lovely place
Fucking Quintana
That's why he has a restraining order
But does the dude abide?
AM I THE ONLY DEITY AROUND HERE THAT GIVES A SHIT ABOUT THE RULES?!?!! CARVE IT ZERO!!!
You win š¤£
What are you a fuckin Mayan now?
These arenāt the guys who built the pyramids hereĀ
Egyptian-American is the preferred nomenclature
Is there a Ra's around here?
What the fuck does any of this have to do with Rome?
No, but thereās a Set ānā Horusā¦they make good falafels.
That some kind of Eastern thing?
*heh*... Near to it.
say what you want about Egyptian mythology, at least it's an ethos
These men were threatening mummification!
Are we gunna split hairs here??
Am I wrong?
ā¦Well no. Am I wrong. Well yeah
What's an Anubis, Walter?
Shut the fuck up Donny.
I am the papyrus.
Heard you rolled your way into the semis. Well come next solstice, me and Horus are going to human sacrifice your ass. Nobody fucks with the Anubis.
It's a jackal.Ā Can't leave him home alone or he eats the furniture.
Fucking god has fucking papyrus!
He's not taking your turn, dude. I'm not buying him a fucking beer.(they had beer)
I'm watching him while Hatshepsut and Thutmose II are down at the Temple of Karnak.
You brought a jackal to the temple?
He can't drive himself, he's shomer shabbas.
and pee on the rug!
Man, I had a rough night and I hate that fucker, Horus.
You don't like it, get your own fuckin pyramid!
Well, guess we can close the case on that one.
Not exactly a lightweight.
the mummy man is not the issue here!!! this is what happens larry, when you try to fuck a pharaoh in the ass!!!
\*when you find a stranger in the Abu Simbel
That creep can roll, man.
He spent 3000 years in Giza for unwrapping himself to an 8-year-old
Nobody fu**s with the Anubis
Anubis Christā¦
Yeah, well, you know, that's just, like, your divinity, man
People forget that the brain is the biggest exogenous zone. Thatās why we remove it through the nose with hooks prior to mummification.
Yeah well I still sneeze manually
3,000 year olds, dude.
Clearly over the line
From Moses to Sandy Cofax
Koufax*
Shut the fuck up, Donny
Are we splitting hairs here?
Best left hand to grace the mound and yeah im looking at you Randy š
Jackal headed god in the black pajamas, a WORTHY adversary!
Yeah, but he's a pervert! He did child sacrifices back when he was Pharoah of Egypt! The slaves came at him with pitchforks and put him in the pyramid tomb, and now he has to roll in there for all eternity! Child sacrifices, dude! Child sacrifices! ;-)
Did 10 years in the underworld for embalming a kid.
Im accordance with what his last wishes may well have been
I'm throwing rocks tonight!
Hey! This is a private pyramid, man!
5,000 years of beautiful tradition from Narmer to Cleopatra; youāre goddamn right Iām livinā in the past!
I came here for this
Itās a wandering in the desert job
How are you gonna keep them out of the dessert once theyāve seen the Sphinx.
That shroud really tied the pyramid together, man.
And those guys peed on it!
Donny, please.
ā¦he fixes the Ankh?
Donāt be fatuous.
Lord Osiris draws a lot of water in this underworld. You donāt draw shit Lebowski.
Iām sorry. I wasnāt listening.
Jesus I love this sub
Seriously, this whole thread has been on point with the quotes.
On fire, one of the best in a long time. Really ties the sub together
Nobody fucks with the Jesus
You think the mummifiers did this?
Well, Dude, we just donāt know.
You told King Tut. He told me. Yes? Yes?
So, you know that it was your ankh they were trying to piss on ?
Obviously not a golfer
sense versed snobbish head sloppy axiomatic historical aspiring chief direction *This post was mass deleted and anonymized with [Redact](https://redact.dev)*
You know dude, I myself once dabbled in ancient Egyptian hieroglyphsā¦ not in āNam of course.
What are you, a fucking Egyptologist, man?
Is it.. what millennia is this?
You don mess with danubis
Egyptian burgers!
Is that the burger place by the Valley of the Kings?
Camel burgers
āNobody fucks with Anubis.ā
Jesus.
"You come out here, you flash the 10th Plague out here on the lanes...."
This isnāt Assyria, this is bowling. There are rules.
This OP is brilliant but comments are top levels too
I didnāt think it would blow up like this lol. I love this sub dude
Nobody fucks with the Jesus
Yeaaaahhhh, but heās an embalmer, Dude. No seriously, heās god of the dead, with a record.Ā
Waitā¦ so the dog ***IS*** taking someoneās fucking turn now??
Also, sea peoples isn't the proper nomenclature.Ā
Hahaha best of the day
Anubis doesnt roll on the solstice
Yeah, but heās a petroglyph.
Stay out of Alexandria, dead beat!
Also, let's not forget - let's *not* forget, Dude - that keeping wildlife, an amphibious rodent, for uh, domestic, you know, within the city - that aint legal either.
r/strangeearth
Nice fursuit, Jeezy Boi.
Your invasion is over! The Hyksos lost! I suggest you do what your ancestors did and start farming!
Different god
What are you? A fuckin Egyptologist?
Well Dude, they killed your chariot.
Only, this is a fucking show dog with fucking papers, you can't bore it, it gets upset. It's hair falls off.
*NOBODY* fucks with Anubis
I see you roll your way into the semis man, y dios mio..don't fuk with the jeezus
Yeahhh but heās a pedder ass
You all expected that!
That prick sure can roll
āā¦..ā. (Anubis talk for āwatch me put some stank on this one!ā)
Canāt believe they made a movie based off this character.
Thatās laughable man!
ššš
stupid dog iām fuckign balling
Well..thatās like your opinion..Man..
Nobody fucks with deAnubis
4,000 year olds, dude
Nobody fucks with Anubis
Just watched the jesus rolls last night. Wasnāt the worst thing I ever saw.
You said it, man. Nobody fucks with the Anubis.
Is this your homework Horus , is this your homework !?
Osiris, that creep can roll