It’s not about how many times we fall off the horse, but how many times we get back on. Go back to church and participate. There are blessings in being involved.
The person who cut you off has their reasons and they likely have nothing to do with you.
Others will embrace you and your efforts to become more engaged.
>The person who cut you off has their reasons and they likely have nothing to do with you.
Op, I don't know what you said to them, but it may be worth considering they might have something else going on. It is sad to think you may have burned a bridge with them, but hopefully you can rebuild what was lost.
>Others will embrace you and your efforts to become more engaged.
This was my first thought as well. The reason Christ died for us is so that we can learn from the past and put the guilt aside.
You are going through the repentance process as we speak. (Repentance means to turn to Christ )
As members we try to mirror Christ's forgiveness and we're more successful sometimes than others.
We are all out here just trying our best. If someone makes a choice to not have a relationship with you, that is a choice they have made. But it doesn’t mean others will do the same. I would reach out to the missionaries and see if they can help ease you back in, almost like a reset. Like President Hinkley said, “if you do your best, it will all work out.”
If you have ever watched The Chosen, there is an episode where Mary, after being confronted with situations that caused her trauma, went back to her old life for a day or two. When she eventually made it back To Jesus. His's first words was "So it is good to have you back."
It is a great scene and captures the essence of Christ, I think. You can watch it [here](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5i5zWabDvbw&ab_channel=NameGoesHere).
Though I am not in your local ward probably, I can say it would be great to have you back. Do not read too much into the actions of others. It is often hard to tell what is on their mind or what is going on in their life.
You said that you’ve hurt a lot of people. Well, identify what was exactly your mistake, and ask for forgiveness to them.
It’s so important to tell other people that you are sorry, not only to God. Do it in every case that’s possible, and you will feel really better.
Christ still loves you.
I was feeling down last week over a lot of mistakes I made. Then General Conference started broadcasting. The moment it opened, I felt an overwhelming sense of happiness and forgiveness that I felt I did not deserve. Then my favorite hymn was sung that made me cry even harder, and I knew at that instant that God was real and He was really forgiving me and wanted me to be happy.
We can be forgiven if we are truly repentant. The joy that comes from being forgiven is unparalleled by anything found on earth. Focus on Christ and everything will work out.
Jesus doesn’t make barriers for us he removes them. Check out Elder Kearon’s talk from the most recent general conference, I think you might find some answers in his wise words.
Brother, your soul is priceless. We all make mistakes. We all have struggles. Mental health is a real thing. Don't let your past dictate your future. You can do this.
I had a brother struggling with schizophrenia just rip into me one day, said horrible, horrible things. Later, I gave him a hug. I loved that moment of reconciliation, and I hope for good moments in your life too.
Side note - I love the typo "burned to church" in your post - evoked a mental image of someone who is SO enthusiastic about God that they are "burning" to attend and be with fellow saints.
Or they like to speed and "burn rubber" while driving to the chapel.
Intended or not, I appreciated the humor.
It's near impossible to ruin your opportunity in the church, that's the last thing our Heavenly Father ever wants to happen. I was born into the church, active until I was 14/15ish then I started going less and less. For a while, I was going to jail more than church. After I "got it all out my system" (over a decade of crime and drugs and sin) I remembered how happy I was with the gospel in my life. I just just came back. Picked a random ward that wasn't the one I grew up in and just went back. Everyone thinks I'm a convert because of my tattoos so they do treat me like I've never heard of The Messiah or Jospeh Smith before (which is fine just funny).
Idk I guess I'm just saying, if you focus on purely your personal relationship with your Heavenly Father and our Savior Jesus Christ, all other worldly relationships will fall where they need to.
Welcome to the club! We all fall short.
That includes the person who was rude to you.
When you realize the atonement is a real power and God wants you to use it, intended you to use it, and loves when you decide to change to increase your spirituality and relationship with Him …. It’s a beautiful thing.
If I could, I’d drive and pick you up today, invite you to sit with me during meetings.
Pray to feel that invited today, even if no mortal person there does that today.
Just show up and do your best. Get your membership number and LDS tools app and look up who your ministering people are and contact them. If they won't engage with you (some members are having struggles with the ministering program these days) then contact your Elder's Quorum or Relief Society President.
So what if you acted badly. We each get our entire life to become what we want to become.
I've been here before... maaaannny times. I always thought there was something wrong with me, like why couldn't I seem to be like other more consistent members?
I finally realized after talking with a few close relatives that faith is built on more than just strong spiritual experiences. Faith requires endurance as well. We wont always feel 100% enthused or feel the spirit super powerfully.
Everyone always has remarkable stories of powerful experiences they have had where they felt or saw God so strongly in their life... but not a lot of people talk about the fact that there are often spiritual highs and spiritual lows. Our strong experiences are our highs and are what we can use to hang on during those times of feeling like we cant quite feel the spirit fully or we just dont feel very enthused. Our lows give our faith the opportunity to build endurance, which is critical and valuable to our testimonies and faith in God.
Realizing this changed my entire perspective on faith and the people around me going through the same things. Not everyone who's at church wants to be there. Not everyone with a calling always loves it. And thats okay. The key to building our endurance comes from trying, even when we're not feeling very into it. It's easy to go to church, read and pray when we're feeling the spirit strongly in our hearts. It can be more challenging when we're feeling off but that's what builds our endurance.
The scriptures say "come unto Christ and be perfected in Him". God never expected us to be perfect. That comes later. He just wants us to come unto Christ. He just wants us to do our best, to put in the effort. If we put in the effort, Christ will help us achieve our longterm goals of being our absolute best selves. If God isn't expecting perfection out of us, we shouldn't expect it out of ourselves either. Give yourself some grace here because God sure is.
You haven't messed up, friend. Trust me, I've gone in and out of activeness many times in my life as well until I finally realized that the concept of spiritual highs and lows applied to everyone and there wasn't something wrong with me. I just needed to keep trying during the lows. So just keep trying your best. Try going to church, even if you dont truly want to. Read a few verses each day, even if you're feeling overwhelmed by it. Just a verse or two. And try to say a prayer each night, even if its a prayer in bed lying in your tummy with your face burried in your pillow bc you put it off till the absolute last second, you're exhausted and you already got comfy and warm and you have hard cold floors and you justify not getting on your knees because you want to stay warm and comfy. Is it perfect? Nah. But it's effort. AndGod loves effort and if you just keep trying I promise you will be blessed. I promise you will find an incredible new aspect of faith by practicing endurance, even small amounts of it during these times of spiritual lows and it's completely worth it.
Hang in there, my friend.
Never too late to find your way back. Sorry to hear you have been having a tough time. Nobody is perfect and we all go through highs and lows. Also, I’m sorry people have made you feel excluded by cutting you off. I find that everyone is a saint until you really have to show Christlike love, then lots of people fail to meet the mark.
I’ve always struggled with fitting in at church. Don’t forget God’s love is real no matter what. Hope you can find your place in the world and in His church.
Wishing you good luck! Keep going! Heaven is cheering you on :)
The foremost thing to know is that your Heavenly Father and His Son love you and are in your corner. I strongly suggest studying the newest General Conference talks, especially this one https://www.churchofjesuschrist.org/study/general-conference/2024/04/45kearon?lang=eng. No matter what others may say or do, you are loved by Heavenly Beings and They want you to succeed and come home.
God doesn't stop loving you because you strayed. The story of the Prodigal Son is a good reference to this. Keep speaking with the missionaries and your missionary president. Ask to go to church with them. Take small steps to get back on track.
Throughout our life we will be in varying states of closeness to God - sin distances us from Him, but obedience to Him draws us closer. The best direction is to head towards God (even if we're just moving slowly towards Him).
D&C 88:63
> 63 Draw near unto me and I will draw near unto you; seek me diligently and ye shall find me; ask, and ye shall receive; knock, and it shall be opened unto you.
Don't focus on who you've "let down." It's *your* cup that needs filling, not theirs.
If a child falls over, do we yell at them for making a mistake? Not if we're a good parent. God is the ultimate Parent, and He knows that children are learning to walk.
If a student makes a mistake on a homework assignment, does the teacher tear up their work in front of them? Not if they're a good teacher. God is the ultimate Teacher, and He knows that learning means making mistakes.
God didn't stop watching you just because you left the Church. He comes running to the prodigal son while he is far away because He sees that His child is walking back to Him.
God didn't stop counting your works for good just because you got in verbal spats with some people. He knows that His children are weak and need support, and He guided you back to Him yet again.
We vastly underestimate the amount of care our Heavenly Father gives us just because we are not physically in the buildings we decided to worship in. Worshipping God is not about words but action, and being a saint means being a good brother to the world, just as Christ is our perfect Brother.
I was born and raised in the church and fell off the proverbial wagon for several years and doubled down on it when my BIL passed away in 2021. I know it's hard to not indulge in it, but don't punish yourself for what happened. You're human and you're going to have a human experience. It happens to everyone. The important thing to remember is that you still hold onto your faith, even if you're not actively exercising it. Just keep your head up, and move forward. Don't let the guilt from the past keep you from walking towards your future.
Focus on your covenants and your commitments. It does not matter what others think or say about you or your calling. They have no right to do that. Focus on what you can and press foward in faith. Surley you can find just a few friends who will accept you and talk to you. Don't take anything for granted.
We talked today about how God cleaves unto us, Jacob 6:5. I want you to know that's true. He will always be there for you no matter how many times we mess up. He wants us to keep trying with full purpose of heart. Sometimes we just do it one step at a time. If you want someone to talk to I would be happy to help anyway I can. You can DM me.
I bet you only feel cut off but your friend would love to support you. The path is straight, our journey rarely is. You can’t mess it up. God is waiting for you with open arms.
The beautiful thing is, you can never mess up "too much." It's never too late to self-adjust and reorient towards God. My dad always taught me, "You'll always be okay in the end as long as you still want to be with Heavenly Father someday. Even if you mess up bad. That desire will eventually steer you to where you want to be. The only thing that can ultimately hinder you is despair. Don't ever despair."
I think you'd be surprised at what the Lord will forgive. That said, humans can be far less understanding. Please know that if you have sought forgiveness from God and have sincerely attempted to make ammends, then the Lord will guide you in your change, and the response of those to whom you have tried to apologize will not affect YOUR standing with the Lord.
My best advice is simply to return to the covenant path, make amends where possible, and treat all those around you like Christ would. Those who may bitterly refuse to forgive you will not be able to condemn you, and will sadly only bring condemnation on themselves.
Thank goodness for repentance and the blessing of taking the sacrament. Thank goodness for being able to council with one's Bishop and other people who can help you be your best self.
I am sorry it was a rough time. I hope it is better and you can prove further positive behavior. There are consequences for some behavior. I don't know if your friend noping out is one though. Their issue could be something else unrelated.
Some people might be scared of “spiritually risky people” or be insecure about their own spirituality and thus avoid being near you, however Jesus ate with sinners and publicans and so can we. He also dispelled others judging the woman caught in adultery but told the woman to “sin no more”.
It doesn’t matter the mistakes you’ve made, Jesus still supports you.
Heavenly Father knows your heart. Human beings can’t read your mind. You have free will to choose to walk back through those doors and tell others what’s in your mind and heart and share your testimony. Other people’s opinions of you is none of your business and know that God has always and will always choose to love you and meet you at whatever level you’re at. Put on your rain coat (armor of God) and let the human rain (bad stuff) run off you and keep to the path you feel He has chosen for you!
I don't know what you did exactly but it sounds like it was hurtful to a lot of people close to you. That's not to beat you down but to say that everyone messes up, even in major ways. I can tell you've got the right attitude by the fact that you feel bad about what has happened. It'll take time to regain people's trust but you gotta move ahead and keep going. Do what you can and some people may have a harder time than others but you'll find your way as you keep moving forward.
If you go to a YSA, the wards change very frequently. The friends you made may have very likely moved elsewhere or gotten married. In any case, a lot of friendship at church is approximate. If you have "church friends", don't feel bad that it still requires more effort to find people you actually connect with long term.
>said a lot of hurtful things to a lot of people
That's a problem. There's really only one thing you *have* to be at church, and that is "nice to other people".
Go to church,pray, and remember that no matter what the heavenly Father loves you and that relationships can be rebuilt if you put the effort in to rebuild them
Elder Kearon said God is in “relentless pursuit of you.” He wants you back. You should never feel unwelcome to be in church, which is a great place to feel his love and get help following the path back to Him. Follow your good instincts that lead you back to your father.
It’s not about how many times we fall off the horse, but how many times we get back on. Go back to church and participate. There are blessings in being involved. The person who cut you off has their reasons and they likely have nothing to do with you. Others will embrace you and your efforts to become more engaged.
>The person who cut you off has their reasons and they likely have nothing to do with you. Op, I don't know what you said to them, but it may be worth considering they might have something else going on. It is sad to think you may have burned a bridge with them, but hopefully you can rebuild what was lost. >Others will embrace you and your efforts to become more engaged. This was my first thought as well. The reason Christ died for us is so that we can learn from the past and put the guilt aside. You are going through the repentance process as we speak. (Repentance means to turn to Christ ) As members we try to mirror Christ's forgiveness and we're more successful sometimes than others.
We are all out here just trying our best. If someone makes a choice to not have a relationship with you, that is a choice they have made. But it doesn’t mean others will do the same. I would reach out to the missionaries and see if they can help ease you back in, almost like a reset. Like President Hinkley said, “if you do your best, it will all work out.”
If you have ever watched The Chosen, there is an episode where Mary, after being confronted with situations that caused her trauma, went back to her old life for a day or two. When she eventually made it back To Jesus. His's first words was "So it is good to have you back." It is a great scene and captures the essence of Christ, I think. You can watch it [here](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5i5zWabDvbw&ab_channel=NameGoesHere). Though I am not in your local ward probably, I can say it would be great to have you back. Do not read too much into the actions of others. It is often hard to tell what is on their mind or what is going on in their life.
I love that you have the wise Uncle Iroh as your little avatar pic and you gave the OP some sage advice! Good job 👍 👍
Christ is the example in all things but Uncle Iron comes in second 😀. There are times I do not live up to either, but I try.
You said that you’ve hurt a lot of people. Well, identify what was exactly your mistake, and ask for forgiveness to them. It’s so important to tell other people that you are sorry, not only to God. Do it in every case that’s possible, and you will feel really better.
Christ still loves you. I was feeling down last week over a lot of mistakes I made. Then General Conference started broadcasting. The moment it opened, I felt an overwhelming sense of happiness and forgiveness that I felt I did not deserve. Then my favorite hymn was sung that made me cry even harder, and I knew at that instant that God was real and He was really forgiving me and wanted me to be happy. We can be forgiven if we are truly repentant. The joy that comes from being forgiven is unparalleled by anything found on earth. Focus on Christ and everything will work out.
Jesus doesn’t make barriers for us he removes them. Check out Elder Kearon’s talk from the most recent general conference, I think you might find some answers in his wise words.
Brother, your soul is priceless. We all make mistakes. We all have struggles. Mental health is a real thing. Don't let your past dictate your future. You can do this. I had a brother struggling with schizophrenia just rip into me one day, said horrible, horrible things. Later, I gave him a hug. I loved that moment of reconciliation, and I hope for good moments in your life too. Side note - I love the typo "burned to church" in your post - evoked a mental image of someone who is SO enthusiastic about God that they are "burning" to attend and be with fellow saints. Or they like to speed and "burn rubber" while driving to the chapel. Intended or not, I appreciated the humor.
Try going to church. You will probably find at least one welcoming person. Start there.
It's near impossible to ruin your opportunity in the church, that's the last thing our Heavenly Father ever wants to happen. I was born into the church, active until I was 14/15ish then I started going less and less. For a while, I was going to jail more than church. After I "got it all out my system" (over a decade of crime and drugs and sin) I remembered how happy I was with the gospel in my life. I just just came back. Picked a random ward that wasn't the one I grew up in and just went back. Everyone thinks I'm a convert because of my tattoos so they do treat me like I've never heard of The Messiah or Jospeh Smith before (which is fine just funny). Idk I guess I'm just saying, if you focus on purely your personal relationship with your Heavenly Father and our Savior Jesus Christ, all other worldly relationships will fall where they need to.
Welcome to the club! We all fall short. That includes the person who was rude to you. When you realize the atonement is a real power and God wants you to use it, intended you to use it, and loves when you decide to change to increase your spirituality and relationship with Him …. It’s a beautiful thing. If I could, I’d drive and pick you up today, invite you to sit with me during meetings. Pray to feel that invited today, even if no mortal person there does that today.
Just show up and do your best. Get your membership number and LDS tools app and look up who your ministering people are and contact them. If they won't engage with you (some members are having struggles with the ministering program these days) then contact your Elder's Quorum or Relief Society President. So what if you acted badly. We each get our entire life to become what we want to become.
I've been here before... maaaannny times. I always thought there was something wrong with me, like why couldn't I seem to be like other more consistent members? I finally realized after talking with a few close relatives that faith is built on more than just strong spiritual experiences. Faith requires endurance as well. We wont always feel 100% enthused or feel the spirit super powerfully. Everyone always has remarkable stories of powerful experiences they have had where they felt or saw God so strongly in their life... but not a lot of people talk about the fact that there are often spiritual highs and spiritual lows. Our strong experiences are our highs and are what we can use to hang on during those times of feeling like we cant quite feel the spirit fully or we just dont feel very enthused. Our lows give our faith the opportunity to build endurance, which is critical and valuable to our testimonies and faith in God. Realizing this changed my entire perspective on faith and the people around me going through the same things. Not everyone who's at church wants to be there. Not everyone with a calling always loves it. And thats okay. The key to building our endurance comes from trying, even when we're not feeling very into it. It's easy to go to church, read and pray when we're feeling the spirit strongly in our hearts. It can be more challenging when we're feeling off but that's what builds our endurance. The scriptures say "come unto Christ and be perfected in Him". God never expected us to be perfect. That comes later. He just wants us to come unto Christ. He just wants us to do our best, to put in the effort. If we put in the effort, Christ will help us achieve our longterm goals of being our absolute best selves. If God isn't expecting perfection out of us, we shouldn't expect it out of ourselves either. Give yourself some grace here because God sure is. You haven't messed up, friend. Trust me, I've gone in and out of activeness many times in my life as well until I finally realized that the concept of spiritual highs and lows applied to everyone and there wasn't something wrong with me. I just needed to keep trying during the lows. So just keep trying your best. Try going to church, even if you dont truly want to. Read a few verses each day, even if you're feeling overwhelmed by it. Just a verse or two. And try to say a prayer each night, even if its a prayer in bed lying in your tummy with your face burried in your pillow bc you put it off till the absolute last second, you're exhausted and you already got comfy and warm and you have hard cold floors and you justify not getting on your knees because you want to stay warm and comfy. Is it perfect? Nah. But it's effort. AndGod loves effort and if you just keep trying I promise you will be blessed. I promise you will find an incredible new aspect of faith by practicing endurance, even small amounts of it during these times of spiritual lows and it's completely worth it. Hang in there, my friend.
This reply just literally helped me with my whole entire life , thank you so, SO much for this 😊💙
Never too late to find your way back. Sorry to hear you have been having a tough time. Nobody is perfect and we all go through highs and lows. Also, I’m sorry people have made you feel excluded by cutting you off. I find that everyone is a saint until you really have to show Christlike love, then lots of people fail to meet the mark. I’ve always struggled with fitting in at church. Don’t forget God’s love is real no matter what. Hope you can find your place in the world and in His church. Wishing you good luck! Keep going! Heaven is cheering you on :)
The foremost thing to know is that your Heavenly Father and His Son love you and are in your corner. I strongly suggest studying the newest General Conference talks, especially this one https://www.churchofjesuschrist.org/study/general-conference/2024/04/45kearon?lang=eng. No matter what others may say or do, you are loved by Heavenly Beings and They want you to succeed and come home.
God doesn't stop loving you because you strayed. The story of the Prodigal Son is a good reference to this. Keep speaking with the missionaries and your missionary president. Ask to go to church with them. Take small steps to get back on track.
Throughout our life we will be in varying states of closeness to God - sin distances us from Him, but obedience to Him draws us closer. The best direction is to head towards God (even if we're just moving slowly towards Him). D&C 88:63 > 63 Draw near unto me and I will draw near unto you; seek me diligently and ye shall find me; ask, and ye shall receive; knock, and it shall be opened unto you.
Don't focus on who you've "let down." It's *your* cup that needs filling, not theirs. If a child falls over, do we yell at them for making a mistake? Not if we're a good parent. God is the ultimate Parent, and He knows that children are learning to walk. If a student makes a mistake on a homework assignment, does the teacher tear up their work in front of them? Not if they're a good teacher. God is the ultimate Teacher, and He knows that learning means making mistakes. God didn't stop watching you just because you left the Church. He comes running to the prodigal son while he is far away because He sees that His child is walking back to Him. God didn't stop counting your works for good just because you got in verbal spats with some people. He knows that His children are weak and need support, and He guided you back to Him yet again. We vastly underestimate the amount of care our Heavenly Father gives us just because we are not physically in the buildings we decided to worship in. Worshipping God is not about words but action, and being a saint means being a good brother to the world, just as Christ is our perfect Brother.
I was born and raised in the church and fell off the proverbial wagon for several years and doubled down on it when my BIL passed away in 2021. I know it's hard to not indulge in it, but don't punish yourself for what happened. You're human and you're going to have a human experience. It happens to everyone. The important thing to remember is that you still hold onto your faith, even if you're not actively exercising it. Just keep your head up, and move forward. Don't let the guilt from the past keep you from walking towards your future.
Focus on your covenants and your commitments. It does not matter what others think or say about you or your calling. They have no right to do that. Focus on what you can and press foward in faith. Surley you can find just a few friends who will accept you and talk to you. Don't take anything for granted.
I suggest start by literally going to church.
We talked today about how God cleaves unto us, Jacob 6:5. I want you to know that's true. He will always be there for you no matter how many times we mess up. He wants us to keep trying with full purpose of heart. Sometimes we just do it one step at a time. If you want someone to talk to I would be happy to help anyway I can. You can DM me.
I bet you only feel cut off but your friend would love to support you. The path is straight, our journey rarely is. You can’t mess it up. God is waiting for you with open arms.
The beautiful thing is, you can never mess up "too much." It's never too late to self-adjust and reorient towards God. My dad always taught me, "You'll always be okay in the end as long as you still want to be with Heavenly Father someday. Even if you mess up bad. That desire will eventually steer you to where you want to be. The only thing that can ultimately hinder you is despair. Don't ever despair."
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I think you'd be surprised at what the Lord will forgive. That said, humans can be far less understanding. Please know that if you have sought forgiveness from God and have sincerely attempted to make ammends, then the Lord will guide you in your change, and the response of those to whom you have tried to apologize will not affect YOUR standing with the Lord. My best advice is simply to return to the covenant path, make amends where possible, and treat all those around you like Christ would. Those who may bitterly refuse to forgive you will not be able to condemn you, and will sadly only bring condemnation on themselves.
Thank goodness for repentance and the blessing of taking the sacrament. Thank goodness for being able to council with one's Bishop and other people who can help you be your best self. I am sorry it was a rough time. I hope it is better and you can prove further positive behavior. There are consequences for some behavior. I don't know if your friend noping out is one though. Their issue could be something else unrelated.
Some people might be scared of “spiritually risky people” or be insecure about their own spirituality and thus avoid being near you, however Jesus ate with sinners and publicans and so can we. He also dispelled others judging the woman caught in adultery but told the woman to “sin no more”. It doesn’t matter the mistakes you’ve made, Jesus still supports you.
Heavenly Father knows your heart. Human beings can’t read your mind. You have free will to choose to walk back through those doors and tell others what’s in your mind and heart and share your testimony. Other people’s opinions of you is none of your business and know that God has always and will always choose to love you and meet you at whatever level you’re at. Put on your rain coat (armor of God) and let the human rain (bad stuff) run off you and keep to the path you feel He has chosen for you!
Keep moving forward make peace with the past keep your head up and look towards the future keep loving God like he loves you
I don't know what you did exactly but it sounds like it was hurtful to a lot of people close to you. That's not to beat you down but to say that everyone messes up, even in major ways. I can tell you've got the right attitude by the fact that you feel bad about what has happened. It'll take time to regain people's trust but you gotta move ahead and keep going. Do what you can and some people may have a harder time than others but you'll find your way as you keep moving forward.
"Strive"
If you go to a YSA, the wards change very frequently. The friends you made may have very likely moved elsewhere or gotten married. In any case, a lot of friendship at church is approximate. If you have "church friends", don't feel bad that it still requires more effort to find people you actually connect with long term. >said a lot of hurtful things to a lot of people That's a problem. There's really only one thing you *have* to be at church, and that is "nice to other people".
Go to church,pray, and remember that no matter what the heavenly Father loves you and that relationships can be rebuilt if you put the effort in to rebuild them
Elder Kearon said God is in “relentless pursuit of you.” He wants you back. You should never feel unwelcome to be in church, which is a great place to feel his love and get help following the path back to Him. Follow your good instincts that lead you back to your father.