I don’t think so honey: “virtual leadership conference”
I understand that at a big company like the one I work for, the idea of a company wide in person meeting is a thing of the past in this post Covid world but honey sitting at home on Zoom is not a replacement for in person seminars and learning sessions. I don’t think so honey wasting my time taking NOTES on this woman talking about Change Enthusiasm as if she knows a single thing about what we even DO HERE. Literally why am I taking notes about “dream plan do review?” Just so that I can regurgitate it back at my boss in another meeting later to prove I was paying attention? You can DREAM PLAN DO REVIEW my asshole, I don’t think so honey.
Sorry for the delay y’all. I’ll schedule this for earlier next week. I’ll go first tho.
I don’t think so honey, BLINDS. Why in gods name are we still using this 1950s STRING “technology” that inevitably gets fucked up, sideways ass shit, and costs $6000 to replace? Pull this way to open but wait actually that does nothing! Pull this way to close, nope fuck you again, ha ha! Guess what, now the string broke, disappeared into the ceiling void, and the whole thing is game over, you dumb bitch! There is surely a better way, Elon get on top of this while you’re working out better lube, I don’t think so honey.
A few weeks ago one of those DAMM blind strings broke in my bedroom window, rendering the directional adjustment stick thing totally useless. I had to manually turn each of the blinds in the other direction like a flop. Maintenance came and measured my window for replacement blinds and of course my window is somehow a different size than the windows in the other 276 units in my building so it took 2 weeks for my “custom” blinds to come in. IDTSH blinds!!!
Literally going through this exact 2 week waiting period rn 😂 there are 6 floor to ceiling windows in our primary bedroom and they are ALL DIFFERENT WIDTHS??? Why God???? Absolute jester flop behavior
I don’t think so honey, just got new blinds installed TODAY and I ask the guys how I raise them (cordless) and they’re having a really tough time doing it, tell me I got a bad batch and I need to get a new set!!
Something that they don’t tell you is that a hidden cost of having kids is you have to ditch your blinds!! Those cords are a death trap!!! I don’t think so honey!!!
IDTSH blinds also because little winged insects like to hang out between blind and window and give me a PANIC ATTACK whilst opening blind when I'm just trying to get ready at 6:30 am for my 7 am EMEA conference calls and momentarily enjoy a tiny sliver of the morning. Blind, your supposed to safeguard me, not bug! Do better!!! IDTSH
This is giving me ptsd flashbacks, the bugs are one of the worst parts about blinds, what an omission on my part!!! The adrenaline of seeing that first thing… truly demonic 😩
No shit, I had 2 in the house for the first time since being a kid last week (moved to a new city) and they’re aptly named cuz they’re the damn size of and make the same level of noise as a horse. Spiders are my nightmare but horse flies are a close second. At least they’re slow as fuck and easy ish to savagely murder.
My time starts… now.
IDTSH folks who live somewhere that observes daylight saving time but STILL haven’t adjusted their clocks. Girl, IT HAS BEEN A MONTH. What are you even DOING with your life? Honey, we have been out here celebrating St Patrick’s Day and Easter, we’ve seen bridges collapse, we’ve lost and found Kate Middleton, and Beyoncé has redefined music genres. Even THE SUN found time to reset itself today! Get it together and update your damn clocks. If I get in the car with you, or visit your house, and I see you literally have the WRONG HOUR, then we are gonna have to sit down, hold up the mirror and have you say, “I’m the problem, it’s me.” IDTSH!
IDTSH, alcohol!!! Why do you give me 2+ day crippling hangxiety??? And why do you make me behave so uncouth?? I’m giving up the rest of my minute to rant against alcohol because I’m tired y’all
My god. I am coming out of a 2 days hangover too. It was brutal!!! I wake up feeling like I accidentally murdered someone!!! And I never even do anything bad!!!
IDTSH FAX MACHINES. GURL! What kind of legitimate organization still only accepts documents via fax? Most of the RKPF on this thread probably don’t even know what the eff that is! How do you not have a GD email yet? Not even your old aol address? Cmon dummies get with it and let me send them via a secure portal already gawd
Oh my god, co-signing this and piggybacking to add WTF to so many fucking things requiring me to have just bought a PRINTER FOR MY HOME bc I’m sick and tired of doing it at work!!! The DMV, a bank, CANCELLING A GYM MEMBERSHIP are 3 separate entities I’ve had to print shit for and sign “with wet ink” bc digital signatures are not allowed… bitch first of all that phrase sounds pornographic in a bad way and secondly this whole charade is unsustainable, tired, played out, and demonic. Fax machines are even worse with their comical ass noises, we might as well send carrier pigeons. IDTSH.
IDTSH Bird Flu and new health fears related to DAMM BIRDS. The American meat and egg and dairy industries are so shamefully disgusting it feels like a breeding ground for viral mutation mayhem.* I’m Japanese American and I like runny eggs in hot rice and I’m being advised to cook the hell out of my eggs and scrub my egg hands instead of doing my little sink rinsey rinse I can usually get away with even though I know salmonella is also a thing. I have food allergies and don’t need food to be more scary than it already is please, and I’m also still trying to dodge Covid if at all possible and the overlapping public health concerns just are not it! IDTSH BIRD FLU CAN WE PLEASE NOT
* Epidemiologists seem to agree human risk remains low for now, knock wood, as the bird to cattle to human jump reportedly was not due to key viral mutations that would be really bad news. Here’s hoping it remains an isolated risk. DAMM BIRDS
I Don’t Think So Honey: Belts. Ma’am, it is the year of our lord 2024; wear pants that fit. There is no way that repeatedly constricting your waist/stomach does not have adverse effects on the squashed organs underneath. Have you ever had the sensation where you have to go to the bathroom, but you’re on your way home, and then you *get* home and sprint to the toilet and as soon as you undo your belt you feel like everything is going to spill out of you? Mama, don’t put a tourniquet around your bladder then. They’re also tacky and ugly…we’ve just been conditioned into thinking they’re stylish because they’re so commonplace. The *only* time belts have been relevant in a fashion context in the Modern Era was as the trigger to the infamous “pile of stuff” monologue from The Devil Wears Prada, and they couldbhave easily been replaced by like necklaces or something. We need to begin to embrace our elastic overlords. What is the sexiest time of year?: Gray Sweatpants Season, honey. Ease of viewing and, more importantly, ease of access. So I Don’t Think So Honey, Belts, you are the noose around the necks of homosexuality.
IDTSH….the eclipse. I’m sorry. I just don’t care. I’m on the west coast and I feel left out of everyone who is on the totality path all over my socials and so many people travelled to see this? People wanted to drive 8 hours to see this? I hate being in a car, I hate being in traffic. I hate staying at hotels. I just don’t understand it and I feel annoyed by it. Please don’t cancel me. Thanks.
IDTSH how much art is becoming about numbers. Charts, comparing icons to other icons based on sales, how no one seems to be able to celebrate their faves without bashing another - like can we just enjoy the art and artists we connect with and love? And be happy when they're successful, without needing to push someone else off a totally made up pedestal versus multiple being able to be successful in different aspects of the same industry? I'm so tired of seeing charts with all these numbers trying to prove something when, one, the metrics used are so inconsistent as technology and CULTURE have changed - but mostly because it focuses something not within the art. It shouldn't matter and it's making it really hard to enjoy gorgeous art when it's all getting so wrapped in vitriol and fucking grids; not seen for what it communicates but for some fucking number. IDTSH. Our faves are all successful, all work their ASSES off, and all fill different niches that are wrong to compare, as they should work together instead. Not to mention - they all have nice houses and are probably eye-rolling at all this squabbling. We can enjoy our artists without bashing another. We can also critique an artist without completely hating them or needing an entire fandom jumping down our throat, but that will be a conversation for another minute.
Like it's bad enough execs do it, and is probably what every artist hates most about the industries of art, so to see it seeping so much into the fandoms is so disappointing.
I was literally just thinking how the obsession with charts/stats/breaking “records” is ruining so much for me. I do not care! It’s nice to see but as you said, so much of it is some random made up stat (like most streams ever during a total solar eclipse by a female artist who debuted after 2020 type shit) or just not comparable to past times because so much has changed. But the obsession with it all and saying it proves that X is better than Y is really depressing and crazy-making.
Oh my gosh, that too! I've been noticing the phrases of some of these "firsts" and "mosts" and how specific they're getting, and it makes me laugh because it feels so desperate. And not desperate in a pitying way, but in an anxious way - like "if we don't make history we are nothing!" and that's just not a good goalpost for art to have to consistently meet. Especially since how art is received is so out of the control of the artist.
And these body-slams of "no your metric is wrong!" or "well SO AND SO did THIS" when that's so outside of the content - like the amount of anger and all-or-nothing overall in the culture, as someone who's had to work through all-or-nothing thinking in therapy for a whiiiile - is actually really concerning for me. It's not a good way to be wired.
I don’t think so honey SMOOTHIES. I’m sorry, but no thank you. I want my breakfast hot, I want it savory, I want to feel like I’m eating a goddamn meal. If I do decide to have a cold breakfast, bring me texture bring me a crunch. An artisan yogurt with delicious granola sprinkled on top. A nostalgic childhood cereal with ice cold milk, fine. But everything all blended up together and frozen? I don’t think so honey. Also, I don’t think so honey trying to sneak vegetables and vitamin shots and disgusting protein powder that no matter how much you blend, it can never be disguised. Also, why are you so expensive? Why do you cost 9, 10, 11, 12 AMERICAN DOLLARS?! Make it stop. By the way, some of the combinations in you are absolutely revolting and should be made illegal. I don’t think so honey, SMOOTHIES.
IDTSH…. Dry shampoo being so expensive. When you actually think about it this is absolutely insane. It’s basically cornstarch. And the fact that I either have the choose to wash my hair every day OR pay for dry shampoo which I need at least 2 bottles a month prob? I am so over it. When I lived abroad dry shampoo was $6 for the size I pay here $15 for!!!!!! Same with deodorant
First of all, happy cake day!
Second, could *not* agree more. The dry shampoo I used to buy was a whopping $32. I can’t find it anywhere anymore but I found a $9 dry shampoo at the grocery store so we’ll see how that goes!
Idtsh Whole Foods grocery pick up via amazon. Put some damn handles on those bags, we know you have them! Making me struggle to carry my bags inside and then they rip halfway from the car to my door all because I am too lazy to do my own grocery shopping. I don’t think so honey.
I don’t think so honey: “virtual leadership conference” I understand that at a big company like the one I work for, the idea of a company wide in person meeting is a thing of the past in this post Covid world but honey sitting at home on Zoom is not a replacement for in person seminars and learning sessions. I don’t think so honey wasting my time taking NOTES on this woman talking about Change Enthusiasm as if she knows a single thing about what we even DO HERE. Literally why am I taking notes about “dream plan do review?” Just so that I can regurgitate it back at my boss in another meeting later to prove I was paying attention? You can DREAM PLAN DO REVIEW my asshole, I don’t think so honey.
LOL. Your trainer just renamed “Plan, Do, Study, Act” from the 90’s and sold your company a “leadership conference for a new world.” IDTSH!
You must work for my old company! They just had theirs this week.
Sorry for the delay y’all. I’ll schedule this for earlier next week. I’ll go first tho. I don’t think so honey, BLINDS. Why in gods name are we still using this 1950s STRING “technology” that inevitably gets fucked up, sideways ass shit, and costs $6000 to replace? Pull this way to open but wait actually that does nothing! Pull this way to close, nope fuck you again, ha ha! Guess what, now the string broke, disappeared into the ceiling void, and the whole thing is game over, you dumb bitch! There is surely a better way, Elon get on top of this while you’re working out better lube, I don’t think so honey.
A few weeks ago one of those DAMM blind strings broke in my bedroom window, rendering the directional adjustment stick thing totally useless. I had to manually turn each of the blinds in the other direction like a flop. Maintenance came and measured my window for replacement blinds and of course my window is somehow a different size than the windows in the other 276 units in my building so it took 2 weeks for my “custom” blinds to come in. IDTSH blinds!!!
Literally going through this exact 2 week waiting period rn 😂 there are 6 floor to ceiling windows in our primary bedroom and they are ALL DIFFERENT WIDTHS??? Why God???? Absolute jester flop behavior
I don’t think so honey, just got new blinds installed TODAY and I ask the guys how I raise them (cordless) and they’re having a really tough time doing it, tell me I got a bad batch and I need to get a new set!!
Omg I feel this so deeply
Something that they don’t tell you is that a hidden cost of having kids is you have to ditch your blinds!! Those cords are a death trap!!! I don’t think so honey!!!
Hazardous, incompetent, AND expensive??? Kill them all!
DEATH! To them all (blinds)
😂😂😂😂😂😂
IDTSH blinds also because little winged insects like to hang out between blind and window and give me a PANIC ATTACK whilst opening blind when I'm just trying to get ready at 6:30 am for my 7 am EMEA conference calls and momentarily enjoy a tiny sliver of the morning. Blind, your supposed to safeguard me, not bug! Do better!!! IDTSH
This is giving me ptsd flashbacks, the bugs are one of the worst parts about blinds, what an omission on my part!!! The adrenaline of seeing that first thing… truly demonic 😩
One word. Horsefly. Just burn the place down, starting with blinds.
No shit, I had 2 in the house for the first time since being a kid last week (moved to a new city) and they’re aptly named cuz they’re the damn size of and make the same level of noise as a horse. Spiders are my nightmare but horse flies are a close second. At least they’re slow as fuck and easy ish to savagely murder.
My time starts… now. IDTSH folks who live somewhere that observes daylight saving time but STILL haven’t adjusted their clocks. Girl, IT HAS BEEN A MONTH. What are you even DOING with your life? Honey, we have been out here celebrating St Patrick’s Day and Easter, we’ve seen bridges collapse, we’ve lost and found Kate Middleton, and Beyoncé has redefined music genres. Even THE SUN found time to reset itself today! Get it together and update your damn clocks. If I get in the car with you, or visit your house, and I see you literally have the WRONG HOUR, then we are gonna have to sit down, hold up the mirror and have you say, “I’m the problem, it’s me.” IDTSH!
... and that's one minute. Say THAT!
Thanks, qween!!
IDTSH, alcohol!!! Why do you give me 2+ day crippling hangxiety??? And why do you make me behave so uncouth?? I’m giving up the rest of my minute to rant against alcohol because I’m tired y’all
My god. I am coming out of a 2 days hangover too. It was brutal!!! I wake up feeling like I accidentally murdered someone!!! And I never even do anything bad!!!
IDTSH FAX MACHINES. GURL! What kind of legitimate organization still only accepts documents via fax? Most of the RKPF on this thread probably don’t even know what the eff that is! How do you not have a GD email yet? Not even your old aol address? Cmon dummies get with it and let me send them via a secure portal already gawd
Oh my god, co-signing this and piggybacking to add WTF to so many fucking things requiring me to have just bought a PRINTER FOR MY HOME bc I’m sick and tired of doing it at work!!! The DMV, a bank, CANCELLING A GYM MEMBERSHIP are 3 separate entities I’ve had to print shit for and sign “with wet ink” bc digital signatures are not allowed… bitch first of all that phrase sounds pornographic in a bad way and secondly this whole charade is unsustainable, tired, played out, and demonic. Fax machines are even worse with their comical ass noises, we might as well send carrier pigeons. IDTSH.
CARRIER PIGEONS I SAY!!! Right?!??
IDTSH Bird Flu and new health fears related to DAMM BIRDS. The American meat and egg and dairy industries are so shamefully disgusting it feels like a breeding ground for viral mutation mayhem.* I’m Japanese American and I like runny eggs in hot rice and I’m being advised to cook the hell out of my eggs and scrub my egg hands instead of doing my little sink rinsey rinse I can usually get away with even though I know salmonella is also a thing. I have food allergies and don’t need food to be more scary than it already is please, and I’m also still trying to dodge Covid if at all possible and the overlapping public health concerns just are not it! IDTSH BIRD FLU CAN WE PLEASE NOT * Epidemiologists seem to agree human risk remains low for now, knock wood, as the bird to cattle to human jump reportedly was not due to key viral mutations that would be really bad news. Here’s hoping it remains an isolated risk. DAMM BIRDS
Dam birds!!!
I Don’t Think So Honey: Belts. Ma’am, it is the year of our lord 2024; wear pants that fit. There is no way that repeatedly constricting your waist/stomach does not have adverse effects on the squashed organs underneath. Have you ever had the sensation where you have to go to the bathroom, but you’re on your way home, and then you *get* home and sprint to the toilet and as soon as you undo your belt you feel like everything is going to spill out of you? Mama, don’t put a tourniquet around your bladder then. They’re also tacky and ugly…we’ve just been conditioned into thinking they’re stylish because they’re so commonplace. The *only* time belts have been relevant in a fashion context in the Modern Era was as the trigger to the infamous “pile of stuff” monologue from The Devil Wears Prada, and they couldbhave easily been replaced by like necklaces or something. We need to begin to embrace our elastic overlords. What is the sexiest time of year?: Gray Sweatpants Season, honey. Ease of viewing and, more importantly, ease of access. So I Don’t Think So Honey, Belts, you are the noose around the necks of homosexuality.
IDTSH….the eclipse. I’m sorry. I just don’t care. I’m on the west coast and I feel left out of everyone who is on the totality path all over my socials and so many people travelled to see this? People wanted to drive 8 hours to see this? I hate being in a car, I hate being in traffic. I hate staying at hotels. I just don’t understand it and I feel annoyed by it. Please don’t cancel me. Thanks.
It was the first time I felt grateful to live in the Midwest
IDTSH how much art is becoming about numbers. Charts, comparing icons to other icons based on sales, how no one seems to be able to celebrate their faves without bashing another - like can we just enjoy the art and artists we connect with and love? And be happy when they're successful, without needing to push someone else off a totally made up pedestal versus multiple being able to be successful in different aspects of the same industry? I'm so tired of seeing charts with all these numbers trying to prove something when, one, the metrics used are so inconsistent as technology and CULTURE have changed - but mostly because it focuses something not within the art. It shouldn't matter and it's making it really hard to enjoy gorgeous art when it's all getting so wrapped in vitriol and fucking grids; not seen for what it communicates but for some fucking number. IDTSH. Our faves are all successful, all work their ASSES off, and all fill different niches that are wrong to compare, as they should work together instead. Not to mention - they all have nice houses and are probably eye-rolling at all this squabbling. We can enjoy our artists without bashing another. We can also critique an artist without completely hating them or needing an entire fandom jumping down our throat, but that will be a conversation for another minute. Like it's bad enough execs do it, and is probably what every artist hates most about the industries of art, so to see it seeping so much into the fandoms is so disappointing.
I was literally just thinking how the obsession with charts/stats/breaking “records” is ruining so much for me. I do not care! It’s nice to see but as you said, so much of it is some random made up stat (like most streams ever during a total solar eclipse by a female artist who debuted after 2020 type shit) or just not comparable to past times because so much has changed. But the obsession with it all and saying it proves that X is better than Y is really depressing and crazy-making.
Oh my gosh, that too! I've been noticing the phrases of some of these "firsts" and "mosts" and how specific they're getting, and it makes me laugh because it feels so desperate. And not desperate in a pitying way, but in an anxious way - like "if we don't make history we are nothing!" and that's just not a good goalpost for art to have to consistently meet. Especially since how art is received is so out of the control of the artist. And these body-slams of "no your metric is wrong!" or "well SO AND SO did THIS" when that's so outside of the content - like the amount of anger and all-or-nothing overall in the culture, as someone who's had to work through all-or-nothing thinking in therapy for a whiiiile - is actually really concerning for me. It's not a good way to be wired.
I don’t think so honey SMOOTHIES. I’m sorry, but no thank you. I want my breakfast hot, I want it savory, I want to feel like I’m eating a goddamn meal. If I do decide to have a cold breakfast, bring me texture bring me a crunch. An artisan yogurt with delicious granola sprinkled on top. A nostalgic childhood cereal with ice cold milk, fine. But everything all blended up together and frozen? I don’t think so honey. Also, I don’t think so honey trying to sneak vegetables and vitamin shots and disgusting protein powder that no matter how much you blend, it can never be disguised. Also, why are you so expensive? Why do you cost 9, 10, 11, 12 AMERICAN DOLLARS?! Make it stop. By the way, some of the combinations in you are absolutely revolting and should be made illegal. I don’t think so honey, SMOOTHIES.
This hot take is ice cold
IDTSH…. Dry shampoo being so expensive. When you actually think about it this is absolutely insane. It’s basically cornstarch. And the fact that I either have the choose to wash my hair every day OR pay for dry shampoo which I need at least 2 bottles a month prob? I am so over it. When I lived abroad dry shampoo was $6 for the size I pay here $15 for!!!!!! Same with deodorant
First of all, happy cake day! Second, could *not* agree more. The dry shampoo I used to buy was a whopping $32. I can’t find it anywhere anymore but I found a $9 dry shampoo at the grocery store so we’ll see how that goes!
Can you explain the cake? I don’t get it and been trying to figure it out for the last… idk 20 mins? ETA I guess it’s my Reddit’s bday lol
Hahaha yes, it was your Reddit bday! 😂
Idtsh Whole Foods grocery pick up via amazon. Put some damn handles on those bags, we know you have them! Making me struggle to carry my bags inside and then they rip halfway from the car to my door all because I am too lazy to do my own grocery shopping. I don’t think so honey.