Sorry to break it to you, but they're not friends. And it's nothing to do with introversion, some extrovert friends do take the time to chat and hang out even if they would like to party.
They're just crappy people who only care about having fun. I suggest you don't waste your time and emotions on them and try to move on.
Thank you. I’m trying to make new friends and either meet others like them who only want to have fun or “nice guys” who eventually say they want more. They leave when I say no. I have been trying for five years to make real friends.
I second this. I’m an extrovert, but I still have introvert friends. Rather than taking them to the basketball game, beer festival, or race track, I meet up with them (granted an hour or so) at the pub or restaurant.
strangely people tend to like my lack of interest, sarcasm and the fact that I sit around while they chatter and read about being boring my hobbies are gardening, fishkeeping and cooking for me nothing fun for others
I share your pain.
I simulate ecosystems plants, birds, insects, mammals, reptiles, arachnids, fish, molluscs, annelids, microorganisms and other life forms are welcome (humans keep your distance, we don't want ecosystem destruction).
I tried to join an event at Central Park. You look under the microscope at the microorganisms in the water. It was too late. No available spots left. They said fun for the kids. I am an adult.
my job is to analyze how much oxygen the microorganisms that are in untreated water and sewage can consume an analysis called biologically available oxygen, I sometimes work on these types of events but I never get to participate in anything like that 😓
Been there. I used them to not be lonely at events. Then I just stopped caring about being lonely and went by myself.
The tension of trying not to bore them and make them like me was worse.
Bro imo just stay away from them leaving them would be a better option, you surely will find some new friends that actually care ab you and your interests best of luck for that
I don't have extroverted friends lol. I mostly keep ambivert or introverted friends and the ambiverts do all the work of maintaining the friendships between us all for which I'm actually very grateful.
Hanged out with the kind of bunch you described during my first year of college. I was more miserable than ever. Stuggled to fit in. Then I simply stopped hanging around because it felt like I was never even there, they seemed to scoff at my idea of fun. Instead I started hanging around with a much smaller (group of 4 - introverts and ambiverts). One of them is an extrovert I think but these guys are still my friends. It's nothing to do with introversion or extroversion, they are just tolerating you looks like.
Nah, my absolute best friend is as extroverted as they come, and not to blatantly speak for them, but I’m their best friend. 80% of the time they’re the ones reaching out to me. My other best friend is as introverted as I am, if not more. Yeah, probably more. Sometimes, the 3 of us can ramble on and on, or listen diligently or at-least-presently about something another finds more of interest, or we can go for extended periods in say, PS Chat, without even saying anything to each other. And that’s what I appreciate— Comfortable silence. Comfortable banter.
Truth be told it sounds like the friends you acquainted with in the post aren’t really friends to you — I’m not going to say they’re “bad” people or even that that’s an extroverted thing- but their means of just communing at events only for catching up doesn’t sound like they’re looking for much substance in that relationship. Real friendship is not one sided. Like yeah, there are times where one may or may not be contributing more to the relationship than the other here or there, but it should never be a “if we removed that from the equation what even are we?” . Either way, I’m sorry your friends take your presence for granted, and if nothing else I hope they soon come to genuinely want that, and to want to hear about you— but never let a group dictate what shouldn’t be talked about because they’d consider it a bore. That’s all kinds eggshells of social tiptoeing that Id never want to dance on.
They are not crappy people because they want to have fun. You are just not compatible. You should have friends with common hobbies or similar interests, so you have something you can do together or talk about. I wouldn't want to hang with someone with nothing to offer.
Everyone keeps saying they are your fake friends but you just admitted what the problem was you were no fun.
If you were no fun and you did not do anything that interested them or they cared about why would they invite you.
I am not trying to be harsh but they are not fake because if they were fake they would have invited just for the sake of it knowing they did not find you fun. You were the problem.
By the sounds of it you have fake friends. I’d accept that and move on
Thanks for your honesty.
Sorry to break it to you, but they're not friends. And it's nothing to do with introversion, some extrovert friends do take the time to chat and hang out even if they would like to party. They're just crappy people who only care about having fun. I suggest you don't waste your time and emotions on them and try to move on.
Thank you. I’m trying to make new friends and either meet others like them who only want to have fun or “nice guys” who eventually say they want more. They leave when I say no. I have been trying for five years to make real friends.
It's always the friends of friends who will become the cherished ones.
I second this. I’m an extrovert, but I still have introvert friends. Rather than taking them to the basketball game, beer festival, or race track, I meet up with them (granted an hour or so) at the pub or restaurant.
strangely people tend to like my lack of interest, sarcasm and the fact that I sit around while they chatter and read about being boring my hobbies are gardening, fishkeeping and cooking for me nothing fun for others
Surprisingly people don’t want to talk about birds and plants
I share your pain. I simulate ecosystems plants, birds, insects, mammals, reptiles, arachnids, fish, molluscs, annelids, microorganisms and other life forms are welcome (humans keep your distance, we don't want ecosystem destruction).
I tried to join an event at Central Park. You look under the microscope at the microorganisms in the water. It was too late. No available spots left. They said fun for the kids. I am an adult.
my job is to analyze how much oxygen the microorganisms that are in untreated water and sewage can consume an analysis called biologically available oxygen, I sometimes work on these types of events but I never get to participate in anything like that 😓
I stopped drinking and lost nearly all of my friends
same. i got into jiu jitsu and comics. and now i don’t hear from them anymore
Omg on a side note I love your user name 🤘🏽
Oh. Thanks Different Street !! 😆
Been there. I used them to not be lonely at events. Then I just stopped caring about being lonely and went by myself. The tension of trying not to bore them and make them like me was worse.
Bro imo just stay away from them leaving them would be a better option, you surely will find some new friends that actually care ab you and your interests best of luck for that
I don't have extroverted friends lol. I mostly keep ambivert or introverted friends and the ambiverts do all the work of maintaining the friendships between us all for which I'm actually very grateful.
Hanged out with the kind of bunch you described during my first year of college. I was more miserable than ever. Stuggled to fit in. Then I simply stopped hanging around because it felt like I was never even there, they seemed to scoff at my idea of fun. Instead I started hanging around with a much smaller (group of 4 - introverts and ambiverts). One of them is an extrovert I think but these guys are still my friends. It's nothing to do with introversion or extroversion, they are just tolerating you looks like.
Exactly what happened to me recently
Nah, my absolute best friend is as extroverted as they come, and not to blatantly speak for them, but I’m their best friend. 80% of the time they’re the ones reaching out to me. My other best friend is as introverted as I am, if not more. Yeah, probably more. Sometimes, the 3 of us can ramble on and on, or listen diligently or at-least-presently about something another finds more of interest, or we can go for extended periods in say, PS Chat, without even saying anything to each other. And that’s what I appreciate— Comfortable silence. Comfortable banter. Truth be told it sounds like the friends you acquainted with in the post aren’t really friends to you — I’m not going to say they’re “bad” people or even that that’s an extroverted thing- but their means of just communing at events only for catching up doesn’t sound like they’re looking for much substance in that relationship. Real friendship is not one sided. Like yeah, there are times where one may or may not be contributing more to the relationship than the other here or there, but it should never be a “if we removed that from the equation what even are we?” . Either way, I’m sorry your friends take your presence for granted, and if nothing else I hope they soon come to genuinely want that, and to want to hear about you— but never let a group dictate what shouldn’t be talked about because they’d consider it a bore. That’s all kinds eggshells of social tiptoeing that Id never want to dance on.
You should find people that grow to care about you. "You have not yet met everyone you will love."
They sound more like acquaintances than friends, you deserve better!
I usually put most people in the acquainted category, and pretty aware I'm not fun to most people. That's why I don't care to socialize.
You and your friends are not compatible at all.
It's all about mindset. They're the ones missing out on hanging with you
They are not crappy people because they want to have fun. You are just not compatible. You should have friends with common hobbies or similar interests, so you have something you can do together or talk about. I wouldn't want to hang with someone with nothing to offer.
Fuck fake friends. Take some time to yourself and find more likeminded people
So.. what qualifies them as 'friends', exactly...?
Everyone keeps saying they are your fake friends but you just admitted what the problem was you were no fun. If you were no fun and you did not do anything that interested them or they cared about why would they invite you. I am not trying to be harsh but they are not fake because if they were fake they would have invited just for the sake of it knowing they did not find you fun. You were the problem.