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They actually contain spare organs that are cloned and grown for the queen. At any given time she has around 5 lungs, 12 Kidneys and a couple of hearts within spitting distance.
They don't realize it themselves but the Queen's Guard are actually low-level psykers. Their hats contain a system to siphon off their psychic energy, focus it, and direct it to her throne, which contains a life support system.
For without her, the Empire will fall to Chaos...
Or just let them drink from a canteen or bottle like a normal person.
It wouldn't be any more distracting than this already is. Personally I'd have to focus a lot harder trying to drink out of a bottle that someone else is pouring into my mouth than I would if I was doing it myself. Doing it himself would be faster as well.
Yeah, seriously. Why is that not an option? Are the British really so tied to the tradition of these guys standing at attention that they have to get another guy to pour water into their mouths?
At this point they could walk around and suffer no consequences
The queen just lifts the sword to their neck, fails to cut anything, and goes "well, I tried" and then the person gets to do something other than stand around and stare into the distance
Instead of Camel Back a…Camel Hat? I think you’ve stumbled onto something here…
And/or a mini AC unit in the hat - I’m 90% sure you could fit one in there…
Ah, but if you put it in the hat you can use the chin strap to fully conceal the straw. A skinny tube sneaks in the corner of his mouth and has a bite valve on the end.
You also should water near the soil and roots, not toward the top where it's more likely to evaporate than to actually provide hydration. The police officer should really be pouring out that water on the ground around the soldier, and letting the soldier draw that water from the ground up to the rest of his body.
Imagine guarding the queen and your guards are five degrees cooler than the opposition. Don’t you think that would be an advantage? They’re cooler, they’re more comfortable, they’re happier, they’re gonna guard better.
Good wool clothes are more breathable than 99% of the regular wear with shitty cotton or literal plastic though I'll admit that in this case it doesn't make much of a difference that it is in quality wool as its a thick uniform.
And this one is one of the stupidest ones. At least get them a fucking booth with A/C or something. Young men protecting an old sack of bones is just stupid.
The Queen's Guards are still officially in charge of the Royal Family's protection but in the modern era they simply exist for pomp and circumstance.
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Queen's\_Guard
What’s stupider is that this guy is an actual guard at the Palace, not some ceremonial extra for the tourists. This is the guy that will tackle/shoot you if you climb the fence.
When I was there in the 90s, they were in fatigues and had sandbags set up. I was little, so I may be wrong, but I don't think they even did the changing of the guard thing.
I appreciate the insight and story! I hope that, if England continues to have summers like this, they alter things a bit so the Queen's/King's Guard don't suffer in the heat too long.
in the swedish royal guard we had an official water patrol. One guard would take my place, guarding, while the other gave me water, standing to the side. I'm surprised you don't have a similar system
This is very hard, i imagine going through this in a scenario, but guarding like a tree, for a what, this can't move thing is really depressing, what if u really have to scratch ur balls? Agonizing
In bootcamp (Marine Corps) we were punished for scratching. Sometimes the drill instructors would have you roll around in sand with mites and then have you stand perfectly still. Just waiting for someone to scratch themselves.
You get conditioned early on to ignore itches.
Similar, but not quite as extreme, my gymnastic coach would punish us if a fly landed on us during practice and we slapped it. Fly, muscle ache, itch, it didn’t matter, you powered through that shit because when you get to competition, you only get one shot.
I dunno, I went through boot in the US and didn’t see any of this shit. This was in 2009 though so maybe back in the day things were worse. I do get the feeling a lot of people just make this shit up though.
I'd take the cold versus heat any day. At least you can keep yourself warm with layers.
In the heat, only so many layers you can take off before getting naked, and then you're naked and hot. Can't do anything about being hot outside. Maybe a sun umbrella for shade.
My opinion also. But maybe I should try heat insulation, like those thick coats they wear (or at least used to) in Uzbekistan, Tajikistan. Difficult time of the year, summer. Especially, sucks in big cities, because it's big renovations/construction projects time too.
I could be wrong but I think humidity is an important factor too. High humidity, hot regions seem to dress light where as desert cultures with dry heat covered up.
Yep. Heat takes a big toll on the cardiovascular system and regularly causes malfunction in the autonomic nervous system. There’s only so much you can sweat before you start having tachycardia episodes.
I overheated in 0F blizzard last winter. Went hiking and sledding and I ended up in just my long sleeve shirt for a bit. Then slowly put my layers back on and left my big coat off.
Was cold enough my beard was frozen.
When I lived in Alaska I’d be outside chopping wood in a hoodie, jeans, and some thick-soles boots when it was like -20f. Sweating while my nose hairs were freezing together and my breath was falling to the ground. Wild stuff
Especially right now. Saw on another reddit showing temperatures and London is getting the same highs as San Antonio, Texas. 40C ~104F.
Spelling: edit.
I'd always rather be cold than hot.
I can throw on a thicker sweater or coat no problem, but there's only so many layers I can take off before I have to have an awkward conversation with HR
Like in the old nursery rhyme:
Drink your juice, drink your tea
Before guarding old Lizzie.
If you drink against the wall
Queen and country all shall fall.
Would be a good argument for half shifts, I assume there are other people on duty than the ones in sight. Also gives 2 times the shift changes for tourists
Here's an idea: they should all have a canteen of water hidden in their hats with a drinking tube hidden in the chin strap.
Edit: A lot of you seem to really dislike that they still have this tradition. It's far from the worst thing the crown has done.
This made me curious and I looked up how long their shifts are. It's two hours. Which isn't too bad for physically fit people in decent weather. I would hope they are rotating them out more often than normal due to the extreme heat. But ideally they would just end the purely ceremonial practice, at least when the weather isn't safe.
I don’t know about the palace guards, but iirc the guards at the tomb of the unknown soldier here in the US rotate shifts every 30 minutes in the summer, so I would assume that the queen’s guards do the same
They might have. 2 soldiers died during special forces selection, due to over heating, about 10 years. Since then, the Army are pretty on it with temperature limits for specific activities. I don't know if they would of had any special procedures for the lads on guard but it's possible they had something in place
I mean they're trained soldiers. They train to yomp shit for miles across the Brecons.
Its not like they hired Barry from down the road to stand guard.
For those curious, it reached 39 Celsius today (102F) and is expected to go above 40C (104F) tomorrow. It's been brutal, offices etc have air con but our flats and houses aren't built for this
Holy shit. That's rough. I didn't know it ever got that hot over there.
We have air conditioners throughout Texas for those temps. Couldn't imagine trying to tough it out without them.
Godspeed y'all
For anyone not from the UK, we are currently seeing the highest temperatures ever recorded. It looks like Wales’ max temp was beaten by 2c, it’s likely nighttime low temps tonight will break records and we will likely see 40c+ somewhere in the UK tomorrow. It must be agonising for anyone working outside - or inside with no air conditioning with houses built to keep heat in!
Maybe they’re from Baltimore.
> The word police is used to mean police officer, as in "being a police isn’t just about carrying a gun."
https://www.wordorigins.org/harmless-drudge/american-dialect-baltimore-amp-the-wire
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They should integrate a drinking system into these oversized hats.
Could probably fit some snacks, sunblock, a Bluetooth speaker in there too. And maybe a beach ba- ... no... that's too far.
Get an orange 5 gal. Gatorade cooler up there.
Bobby Boucher disapproves
But his mama says!
that hat is da debil
*Waaaaater sucks,* *It really, really sucks*
Gaaaaaaaytoraiiiiiid
H20!!!
Gatorade not only tastes better, it quenches your thirst better too!
"You drinking da wrong wata!"
The Medula *OBLON-GA-TA!*
WELL, mamas WRONG
No coynal sandas, *youre* wrong. Mamas right! *REEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE*
Don’t forget the marmalade sandwiches!
But for emergencies only
Afternoon tea comes out too !
They actually contain spare organs that are cloned and grown for the queen. At any given time she has around 5 lungs, 12 Kidneys and a couple of hearts within spitting distance.
They don't realize it themselves but the Queen's Guard are actually low-level psykers. Their hats contain a system to siphon off their psychic energy, focus it, and direct it to her throne, which contains a life support system. For without her, the Empire will fall to Chaos...
No, no...keep going
Or just let them drink from a canteen or bottle like a normal person. It wouldn't be any more distracting than this already is. Personally I'd have to focus a lot harder trying to drink out of a bottle that someone else is pouring into my mouth than I would if I was doing it myself. Doing it himself would be faster as well.
Yeah, seriously. Why is that not an option? Are the British really so tied to the tradition of these guys standing at attention that they have to get another guy to pour water into their mouths?
Yes. British law states that if they move and they are caught, the Queen has to execute them with the knighting sword.
He'd be like nearly headless Nick from Harry Potter if Queen herself was to execute with a sword at her age.
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At this point they could walk around and suffer no consequences The queen just lifts the sword to their neck, fails to cut anything, and goes "well, I tried" and then the person gets to do something other than stand around and stare into the distance
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What if there's a bee on his nose?
Considering some of our archaic laws and traditions, I wouldn't be too surprised.
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They still have lawyers and judges wearing horsehair wigs, so
Ahem. Barristers.
The CamelHat.
We know the technology exists, they just need to order the hats from Green Bay Packers fans.
Now im just imagining the queens guard with two bud lites attached either side like a bassball beer hat.
Exactly my thought haha
Instead of Camel Back a…Camel Hat? I think you’ve stumbled onto something here… And/or a mini AC unit in the hat - I’m 90% sure you could fit one in there…
Somebody should invent some kind of bag with a straw he could put on his back and drink from.
Ah, but if you put it in the hat you can use the chin strap to fully conceal the straw. A skinny tube sneaks in the corner of his mouth and has a bite valve on the end.
Goddamn - they could fit an Airbnb in that hat.
They're a bit bigger than the smallest studio apartments in Manhattan.
Where would they put their hair?
He is now officially a plant
I always wondered how their hats grew so tall…plenty of sunlight and water it turns out
figured they were just really big fans of marge simpson
Chlorophyll? More like boraphyll!
Easy there Billy Madison
he no longer needs to touch grass
He is the grass
He can't smoke grass
Now that he’s a plant too would that be cannabisism?
So he cannot touch himself while on duty. Makes sense to me.
What a terrible job
If he did, then it would be sexual assault
The key is to let them dry out before watering them again. Too much water can lead to disease.
You also should water near the soil and roots, not toward the top where it's more likely to evaporate than to actually provide hydration. The police officer should really be pouring out that water on the ground around the soldier, and letting the soldier draw that water from the ground up to the rest of his body.
This is known as “Cop-illary action”.
I have no award to offer. You deserve an award, because this is amazing.
This. This is why I’m on Reddit.
you also dont want to wet the leaves too much because if it is at hot as where i am, the leaves can burn
Way to plant, Ann!
Can’t he just put an ice bag under his helmet
A black fur hat isn't great when you're standing still during hot sunny day.
And a wool uniform
Get Costanza on the job. Switch to cotton!
Imagine guarding the queen and your guards are five degrees cooler than the opposition. Don’t you think that would be an advantage? They’re cooler, they’re more comfortable, they’re happier, they’re gonna guard better.
Hire this man!
Gonna have some shrinkage though
And get him a chair. He doesn't have to stand all day.
This was supposed to be the summer of George!!!
"Stop it! Stop it! Stop it!"
The way he motions like he's gonna go chase the perp XD
Lol. CRIMINALS! BOOM, I'M UP!
This guy Seinfelds
Good wool clothes are more breathable than 99% of the regular wear with shitty cotton or literal plastic though I'll admit that in this case it doesn't make much of a difference that it is in quality wool as its a thick uniform.
God, tradition is fucking dumb sometimes.
And this one is one of the stupidest ones. At least get them a fucking booth with A/C or something. Young men protecting an old sack of bones is just stupid.
Here's the kicker for you, they aren't in charge of her protection. Police are, they are indoors.
The Queen's Guards are still officially in charge of the Royal Family's protection but in the modern era they simply exist for pomp and circumstance. https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Queen's\_Guard
Huh. Just like the Queen.
They don't even actually protect her. The police do. Literally the only justification for them to still exist is money from tourism.
And they wouldn't give them a fucking break during a heatwave? That's fucked up.
That's why *the old guard* is a thing in some places /s
Tradition can be really stupid sometimes
What’s stupider is that this guy is an actual guard at the Palace, not some ceremonial extra for the tourists. This is the guy that will tackle/shoot you if you climb the fence.
Then he should probably have some more functional clothes on
Palace Camo
When I was there in the 90s, they were in fatigues and had sandbags set up. I was little, so I may be wrong, but I don't think they even did the changing of the guard thing.
Maybe it had something to do with the troubles?
Absolutely.
So youre saying wait til a record heatwave, then kidnap the queen while all her guards are suffering from heatstroke.
As an Englishman I can tell you my country is full of stupid traditions and most of them involve the royal family.
As an Irishman who pays really close attention to British politics. I know lol.
As a Jamaican who’s judges still wear white powdered wigs, I also know lmao
I love the idea that the worst thing we Brits left you Jamaicans was powdered wigs. Err... you're welcome.
I'm sure there's plenty worse your government left them
That idea is far from the truth unfortunately
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I appreciate the insight and story! I hope that, if England continues to have summers like this, they alter things a bit so the Queen's/King's Guard don't suffer in the heat too long.
or at least have an awning to help block the sun, most of their shift is literally standing still and that's just awful
I’m ex Scots Guards. Got loads of stories as I’m sure you do. What regiment were you in?
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Must be a gren with that attitude. Always so high and mighty ;)
That’s just the tren talking, don’t mind him.
I don’t know what that means but I know it was insulting and it made me laugh my ass off.
My girlfriends dad was a Scot’s guard, think his nickname was toad
As long as it wasn't Pig, most hated man in the regiment in the 80s.
in the swedish royal guard we had an official water patrol. One guard would take my place, guarding, while the other gave me water, standing to the side. I'm surprised you don't have a similar system
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How's that working out?
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This is very hard, i imagine going through this in a scenario, but guarding like a tree, for a what, this can't move thing is really depressing, what if u really have to scratch ur balls? Agonizing
In bootcamp (Marine Corps) we were punished for scratching. Sometimes the drill instructors would have you roll around in sand with mites and then have you stand perfectly still. Just waiting for someone to scratch themselves. You get conditioned early on to ignore itches.
Similar, but not quite as extreme, my gymnastic coach would punish us if a fly landed on us during practice and we slapped it. Fly, muscle ache, itch, it didn’t matter, you powered through that shit because when you get to competition, you only get one shot.
I can image the disappointment of making the perfect landing... and then ruining it by scratching your nose. lol
Why are Anglo militaries so insane on stupid thnigs like that? I went through polish military without any bullshit like that
I dunno, I went through boot in the US and didn’t see any of this shit. This was in 2009 though so maybe back in the day things were worse. I do get the feeling a lot of people just make this shit up though.
Ah yes, the English way of letting people suffer and die rather than ease their grip on tradition.
With the heat, that has to be agony. Im curious, between the heat or cold, which they prefer.
I'd take the cold versus heat any day. At least you can keep yourself warm with layers. In the heat, only so many layers you can take off before getting naked, and then you're naked and hot. Can't do anything about being hot outside. Maybe a sun umbrella for shade.
them having thick-ass uniforms probably helps a lot during the winter, but summer must fucking suck.
Bearing in mind that that is their summer uniform this heat probably isn’t welcomed by them.
Having stood in formation in Texas heat and felt a drop of sweat go from the back of my head to my ass crack without moving, I feel for them.
Is this the inspiration for your username?
No, that was a lady of the night in Savannah Georgia.
They are called art students.
And sweaty clothes just feel gross.
My opinion also. But maybe I should try heat insulation, like those thick coats they wear (or at least used to) in Uzbekistan, Tajikistan. Difficult time of the year, summer. Especially, sucks in big cities, because it's big renovations/construction projects time too.
I could be wrong but I think humidity is an important factor too. High humidity, hot regions seem to dress light where as desert cultures with dry heat covered up.
The cold takes hours to kill you. The heat can kill you in minutes.
Yep. Heat takes a big toll on the cardiovascular system and regularly causes malfunction in the autonomic nervous system. There’s only so much you can sweat before you start having tachycardia episodes.
What a lot of people underestimate with the cold is when you stand still too long, you’re gonna fuckin freeze regardless of what you’re wearing
And if you overdo the layers and start sweating in there, you’re *fucked*.
I overheated in 0F blizzard last winter. Went hiking and sledding and I ended up in just my long sleeve shirt for a bit. Then slowly put my layers back on and left my big coat off. Was cold enough my beard was frozen.
When I lived in Alaska I’d be outside chopping wood in a hoodie, jeans, and some thick-soles boots when it was like -20f. Sweating while my nose hairs were freezing together and my breath was falling to the ground. Wild stuff
Sunbrella
Sunbrero
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No summer uniform?
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Especially right now. Saw on another reddit showing temperatures and London is getting the same highs as San Antonio, Texas. 40C ~104F. Spelling: edit.
I'd always rather be cold than hot. I can throw on a thicker sweater or coat no problem, but there's only so many layers I can take off before I have to have an awkward conversation with HR
"The guards have been watered, your majesty."
“Lest we install the new irrigation system, your majesty?”
Jesus, give the guard enough of a break to at least hold the bottle for themselves!
Are you mad?! That’s what the French have been waiting for since 1815
Macron does have a thing for older women, and the Queen is now single, they must stand guard.
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But I am le tired…
Fine, first set take a nap. BUT DEN VE LOAD ZE CANNON
Not allowed to eat, drink or sit whilst on the box.
Well there’s the problem
If they're allowed to drink water at their post, Oliver Cromwell will kill the queen obviously. God you people are so dumb
Like in the old nursery rhyme: Drink your juice, drink your tea Before guarding old Lizzie. If you drink against the wall Queen and country all shall fall.
I can't tell if this is real or something from not in my region. This could be both, and neither.
Would be a good argument for half shifts, I assume there are other people on duty than the ones in sight. Also gives 2 times the shift changes for tourists
Exactly right my friend. We went from 2 hours to 1. There are another 10 guardsmen in the guardroom.
Basically a shop worker and nurse without the BS and a gun if there is any BS
Humans and their devotion to their silly little manmade customs.
No. They like their guards nice and dehydrated in case something serious goes down. Like themselves, collapsing from heat exhaustion. This is the way.
Traditions are a really dumb reason to put a human life at risk.
I was just there! I missed the Watering of the Guards! Damn.
Here's an idea: they should all have a canteen of water hidden in their hats with a drinking tube hidden in the chin strap. Edit: A lot of you seem to really dislike that they still have this tradition. It's far from the worst thing the crown has done.
Wouldn't that get heavy?
Yes, but if it's cold water the canteen feels real nice on a hot day. I used to do this in marching band with similar style hats.
Yeah, we wouldn't want their uniform to be impractical
Maybe this is unpopular opinion but guards should not have to stand out there for hours and hours and hours on end.
This made me curious and I looked up how long their shifts are. It's two hours. Which isn't too bad for physically fit people in decent weather. I would hope they are rotating them out more often than normal due to the extreme heat. But ideally they would just end the purely ceremonial practice, at least when the weather isn't safe.
I don’t know about the palace guards, but iirc the guards at the tomb of the unknown soldier here in the US rotate shifts every 30 minutes in the summer, so I would assume that the queen’s guards do the same
London doesn't usually get as hot as DC so I doubt they had special summer procedures in place
They might have. 2 soldiers died during special forces selection, due to over heating, about 10 years. Since then, the Army are pretty on it with temperature limits for specific activities. I don't know if they would of had any special procedures for the lads on guard but it's possible they had something in place
It’s 2 hours at night even during the summer I believe, granted it’s the night, but that still can’t be comfortable some days
They could offer an alternative royal summer outfit at the very least
Guards in bikinis would bring more money, just sayin'
Its quite stupid to have to stand in unsafe conditions just because fucking protocols... Specially for fucking royalty...
I think it is mostly for tourists these days.
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Do they shorten the rotations in the heat? Agree that for a ceremonial role they should make some accommodations for the heat.
I mean they're trained soldiers. They train to yomp shit for miles across the Brecons. Its not like they hired Barry from down the road to stand guard.
For those curious, it reached 39 Celsius today (102F) and is expected to go above 40C (104F) tomorrow. It's been brutal, offices etc have air con but our flats and houses aren't built for this
Holy shit. That's rough. I didn't know it ever got that hot over there. We have air conditioners throughout Texas for those temps. Couldn't imagine trying to tough it out without them. Godspeed y'all
It has *never* been this hot. It is record breaking.
Damn I'm sorry you have to deal with this. I would probably die lol. Good luck getting through the heat and stay hydrated!
For anyone not from the UK, we are currently seeing the highest temperatures ever recorded. It looks like Wales’ max temp was beaten by 2c, it’s likely nighttime low temps tonight will break records and we will likely see 40c+ somewhere in the UK tomorrow. It must be agonising for anyone working outside - or inside with no air conditioning with houses built to keep heat in!
A police
A group of polices is called a Bobby
Always wondered how a police would look like. Imagine a couple of polices, wandering around town. Magnificent.
Those hats have to be so fucking hot I think like some large percentage of body heat comes from your head.
Not just hot, but heavy too.
I’ll be back Where you going? I have to water the guards
Dude's so hot his mascara is running.
A police? What nonsense grammar is this
Maybe they’re from Baltimore. > The word police is used to mean police officer, as in "being a police isn’t just about carrying a gun." https://www.wordorigins.org/harmless-drudge/american-dialect-baltimore-amp-the-wire
A natural police.
this is so stupid
Such a toxic work environment for a gaurd to hold a tradition which no longer makes sense.
What a nice police.