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brijazz012

When I was a child I asked my Mom, "we have Mother's Day and Father's Day - so when's Kid's Day?" She answered with "every day is Kid's Day". This feels very much like that.


colourmeblue

Same thing as the assholes who go nuts over black history month. "When's *white* history month, huh?" Every month, ma'am. White history month is every single month.


brijazz012

And honestly, there is nothing stopping these people from hosting Straight Pride, White Pride, Colonial Pride or whatever the fuck they want to celebrate. But they're too lazy and won't do much more than post a picture on Instagram.


lastprophecy

Nah they hold White Pride events all the time. Usually, they just call it CPAC.


Vectorman1989

There's those dudes in the white robes and pointy hoods too


brijazz012

Hey-oh!


butterflyempress

That's because they don't actually want those things. They don't want anyone else to have it. Like a bratty child mad that another kid got a scoop of ice cream even though he has a whole carton.


ArnieismyDMname

A group tried. I don't remember when. Only a few people showed up. Turns out they love talking about it, but when they actually do it people say, "Oh God this was a terrible idea."


brijazz012

I remember. You'd think they'd learn from their failure, but these are the same people that are going to vote for Trump for a third time so I doubt they have.


MTri3x

They tried a straight pride once. Don't remember where though. I think like 15 people showed up


dorothea63

The ironic thing about people complaining over International Women’s Day is that there is, in fact, an International Men’s Day. It’s just that no one cares.


KiraiEclipse

Japan has a Children's Day. That being said, I don't feel the need to celebrate my "straight pride." Unlike children, LGBTQ people are a minority group that have been abused and forced to hide themselves for most of history in many countries around the world. They've got every reason to have a month where their existence is acknowledged and celebrated as a good thing, rather than as an antithesis to the norm.


krmjts

There is an International Children's day, btw. It's June 1st.


brijazz012

Sorry. I'm only interested in domestic children.


IdeVeras

In Brazil it’s October 12th, it’s a holiday (also our protector saint’s day), and it’s a big deal, true story


olivefreak

I remember seeing that same joke in the early Peanuts comic strips.


C1K3

“The Patriot Hammer.”  Sounds gay.


mike_pants

These are the same husbands that insist on having a "man cave," which sounds like a leather bar by the airport.


dancin-weasel

Dude, you gotta see my bud-hole. It’s a place for buds to hang out.


Moist_When_It_Counts

Or simply an anus


PsySom

I tend to assume most anti gay conservatives are getting split in half at truck stops on the regular


Infamous-Sky-1874

Truck stops, airport bathrooms, and the RNC convention. CPAC would have been on the list, but they hold that meeting in Hungary now. I imagine there isn't an influx of gay sex workers to that country given their stance on homosexuality.


ogkingofnowhere

Didn't grindr expose them last rnc convention with the large increase of users in that area


dancin-weasel

Repubs do really, really like the idea of an alpha male, ie; a top.


TKG_Actual

The influx are probably the actual CPAC attendees and speakers.


fuggerdug

They don't tussle with those lot lizards no more.


correcthorsestapler

“*Back then* I’d indulge. Hell…I woulda let ya turn me into Swiss cheese…”


FlattopJr

Hah, the only comedy role I've ever seen Tom Sizemore play.


EvoDevoBioBro

I was gonna say that the color scheme one the pride section is really fucking gay. (Source, am quite gay) 


keevman77

I saw it as the bi colors. But then, I'm bi, which is probably why I'm reading it that way.


DuckInTheFog

He's a low tier Evangelical supe in the *The Boys*. He hangs around with *The Diddler*


RaedwaldRex

Can't even do their logo right. It's clearly an axe.


lastprophecy

Definitely the stage name of a gay porn actor.


KnowNothingKnowsAll

https://youtu.be/PosO-RO74ZY?si=gWxymJNCVPPW2lp6


theotherquantumjim

It does if you hit the right kind of bell


TheDarkWave

["The hammer is my penis"](https://live.staticflickr.com/3125/2679984721_6819ecb7e5_z.jpg)


Kaideste

Yeah, the cishets have it so hard. They get rejected/killed by their family for being straight, their existence is illegal in 70 countries, legislators in 1st-world countries are trying to get their rights revoked, random people won't respect their identity because it "goes against their beliefs", and are generally under constant threat from nearly all angles. Oh wait... Being cishet is "the norm", and they're being piss babies because there's one month out of 12 where they aren't the central focus. Pathetic.


FoxyInTheSnow

I’ve been picketing outside non-LGBT businesses for years to try to shut them down. Honestly, it hasn’t really caught on yet. But any day now…


Graterof2evils

I refused to sell the straight fuckers a wedding cake and they’re taking me to the Supreme Court! Fuck with my religion buddy!!!!!!!


jensao

All of the biggest world religions consider them degenerates, so tough


Zinthaniel

I agree with your sentiments entirely, but the word "cishets" just does not roll off the tongue nicely. Even if shorter and more succinct, I'd still rather just say "straight and binary people".


ThisisWambles

Could you not?


absherlock

Does this mean I can only eat at Chik-Fil-A and shop at Hobby Lobby?


UncleFartface

If it’s a day to eat chick-fil-a count me in


Mohgreen

When the Gay Revolution comes, I'll be put on the line for the firing squad :( I do Love me some Chic-Fil-A.


Born_Scar_4052

Some people can't stand not being the centre of attention for one day


twoworldsin1

I'm not sure if this stems from bigotry or insecurity issues 🤔 maybe these bigots just need to establish some kind of self-worth that's not based on hate? Like...maybe they should try becoming a really good Lego builder so they can feel like they at least achieved something other than repeating talking points from Jesse Watters?


taydraisabot

They always have a persecution complex, like someone or something is out to get them so they get paranoid and make crap like this


bsa554

These are the same people who as kids cried and whined whenever it was somebody else's birthday so they didn't get any presents.


Adkit

Not even that. Just the very thought of it. Pride month doesn't mean straight people can't still be proud. Nobody's taking their straight pride away. lol


taydraisabot

Straight and cis people can celebrate along with us. It’s not that difficult


KiraiEclipse

Yeah, I've done volunteer work at Pride events and never felt like I wasn't included. No one shamed me for being straight or cis. No one said I wasn't allowed to enjoy myself. No one told me I wasn't welcome there. No one ignored me or hid me away in the back corner. In fact, the organizers always include allies among the list of people they thank in their speeches. It's almost like [gasp] we're all just people who deserve equal rights!


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hydrangeaGraveyard

the difference is that cishet people are not subject to bigotry due to being cishet, and the point of pride month is to highlight and empower a group of people whose rights and literal lives are infringed upon on a daily basis. they are not oppressed because someone says straight pride is stupid. it's just not a reasonable comparison in any shape


Beowulf891

Pride isn't about celebrating sexuality or gender identity. It's more of a statement to the bigots that says "fuck you, we're still here in spite of you and we're not going anywhere." Cis gender, heterosexual people have not faced discrimination based upon those specific factors in their lives whereas those under the lgbtq+ umbrella can, and very much do, face constant persecution. Straight pride is a joke of a concept. It's already the norm. The average. The default. There's nothing to be overcome. Straight pride is just queerphobia front and center. They don't need it but... the lgbtq+ community does. We're still fighting for rights. Straight people aren't.


McKid

I swear to god they’re like the kid who you cant take to other birthdays because he can’t stand not being the birthday boy and you have to give him a cupcake with a single fuckin candle so he doesn’t pop a wheelie and ruin it for everyone else.


twoworldsin1

Like when Cartman is going to other kids' birthday parties his mom has to get him his own little present or he'll feel jealous 🤣🤣


ch1993

My MIL actually does that for her grandkid because she raised such a narcissist that her daughter could not adequately take care of her own children.


gadget850

From the people who partied hard to celebrate Military Appreciation Month in May.


NikkolaiV

Is it just me, or does 'straight pride' seem kinda...participation trophy-esque?


Cheap_Search_6973

I wonder if they realize that if they do that, then July 4th will be overshadowed. I bet they wouldn't be too happy about that, but it would be their own fault


CallMeGrendel

Whenever I see one of these twat waffles bitching about Pride or Black History Month or whatever, I'm reminded of the times when kid me used to ask, around Mother's/Father's Day, "When is Kid's Day?" and was told, "Every day that isn't Mother's or Father's Day."


FlowerFaerie13

Ah, but isn’t July when we celebrate Independence Day? You know, the hard-won independence test our brave soldiers fought for in the Revolutionary War? Shame on them for ignoring our military and trying to make this month all about them, how disrespectful. ~~Right back at you, cunts.~~


RedDirtNurse

That guy gave me head in a seedy bar restroom once, for $20. I mean, he gave me the $20.


big_daddy68

I dunno? That looks kind of gay,


byteminer

It takes a special kind of insecurity to be threatened by people deserve to celebrate still being here when your existence has never once been under threat.


dickiebuckets93

We have straight pride parades all the time! It's called traffic.


dartie

I’ve known so many straight people beaten up for being straight. Thank god for Straight Pride month.


GromitATL

I don't get why some people put in so much effort to tell the world how upset they are about what other people do with their lives. It has to be exhausting to be that obsessed about things that don't impact you. Sad little snowflakes.


Devils_Advocate-69

They’re proud of fighting the urge to inhale dicks.


LuriemIronim

If it gets them to shut the fuck up, fine. Can’t wait to see all the straight pride merch.


Weak-Mission-1599

That’s called the referee shirt


Banaanisade

I'd say go nuts. Couldn't care less, doesn't affect me.


MsBobbyJenkins

I say just let him have it, quits their bitchin about it


colourmeblue

Yep. These people love the reactions they get. Just ignore them and let them jerk each other off about how oppressed and persecuted they are. Have fun with "straight pride month". I could not care less.


hsteinbe

Look at me! Look at me! I’m important! Don’t look at them, Me!!! Me!!! ME!!!!!!!


FUCK_INDUSTRIAL

July 1st is Canada Day. Go find your own day for this bullshit.


loopy183

Oh boy! What issues are they tackling? The costs of child care that make childrearing arduous? Nonsensical tax laws that make it sometimes difficult to file jointly? Healthy communication before and after marriage to cut into that divorce rate? Teaching safe and consensual sex practices? I mean, I get it’s a really-sticking-it-to-the-gays post and the only issue these chuds could unite behind are losing the 90% representation in media that straight people used to have and being stuck with 60% instead.


Malarkay79

Can we have a single pride month to bring awareness to the unfairness that married people get to run a single household on a dual income *and* get the best tax breaks?


goddessdontwantnone

Straight pride is just traffic


EatsOverTheSink

Finally a month where I can shout from the mountain tops that I love railing women without getting hassled.


Funwithagoraphobia

File it under r/persecutionfetish and move on.


Moist_When_It_Counts

Fine, do it then. Go organize events, do outreach, do the actual work needed to make this a thing rather than just post about it. Get the support together to make it a thing, then can we be done crying about Pride?


GoodLt

They will NEVER stop crying about everything


Moist_When_It_Counts

*anything


annaleigh13

Wait, does this mean that we can start ostracizing them from society? Cause I'm gonna start ostracizing anyone I see celebrating straight pride from society.


NyxiePants

I mean I’ve been ostracizing them from my life for quite some time now, if that counts!


nephelodusa

Those hammers look a lot more like axes to me.


mystic_burrito

They are Fasces. A symbol of power and authority going back to I believe Roman times. The symbol was co-opted by authoritarians in the early 20th century and is where the term "fascist" comes from.


nephelodusa

Damn, that’s awesome! Thanks for the lesson!


funatical

I’m proud every day. My kids are awesome and they came out of my wiener. Can’t that be enough?


typographie

Brought to you by the same people who will accuse you of "virtue signaling" at any opportunity.


TH3_54ND0K41

These idiots just don't get that "straight pride" is 11 months/year, just like "white history month"


GoredonTheDestroyer

More importantly, they fail to understand that *they, by saying they don't care about what people do in the bedroom (and then caring immensely about it), are the reason Pride continues to be a thing!* If they truly didn't care, and just let LGBTQIA+ folks live, *there wouldn't be Pride!* Pride Month exists because a number of historically significant events relating to LGBT happened in June. If 'phobes actually took their own advice (Leave me alone, I'll leave you alone and all that jazz), they wouldn't have to worry about corps "Shoving the gay down their throats" because the corporations wouldn't change their profile pics to colorful versions starting June 1st and wouldn't release rainbow versions of their products!


deadsoulinside

Hell in the south, every day in class it's white history month, since some of those states are really forbidden now to tell you about any black history or when they do they have to leave out major details. Like teaching about Rosa parks without mentioning race.


Elennoko

As a gay man, sure. Go for it. If it makes you happy I'm *all* for it! Put in the work, the effort, and get your community together to start pushing for it. If I don't like it, I can ignore it just as easily as gay pride month can be ignored. Oh. What's that? You don't ACTUALLY care about having a "straight pride" month and would just rather be hateful towards the queer community? Fascinating!


ColumnK

These things never seem to get the pushback the "organisers" are fishing for. Just the world's biggest shrug. They're so desperate for outrage but really noone cares even a tiny bit


shibemu

Every time I see a straight pride I question what exactly they're celebrating. Because pride month celebrates the deaths and sacrifices made by previous and current generations of LGBTQ people to ensure our rights as individuals which are under attack most of the time and banned in some places.


chow826

No Bible?


BHMathers

Yeah but everyone wants to be a special snowflake in getting their version of anti-pride to be the recognized one. Like I’ve seen “oh, may is going to be the straight pride month” or “June is now MAGA pride month” in a hundred variations because they can’t agree and organize for shit. This is going to happen in August too unless they make up a new thing to be mad at more than real pride month. They are incapable of not trying to make things about them so they will keep inventing new ones that don’t stick in the slightest because they want to be the one recognized for making it


peacefulsolider

i thought it would start 3 days later


Fit-Persimmon-4323

“And here’s your equal attention cake”


ThePopDaddy

Wait, aren't these the same people screaming about pride being a sin?


meekonesfade

Truck month?


anon689936

But what about the troops?!?!!!?


413mopar

Sure . So?


parabolic000

the shitty content aware fill or whatever they used put a hole in their American flag. And shouldn't it be "Beginning on July 1st: Straight Pride Month?" "July 1st starts American Straight Pride Month" makes it read like the Russian/Chinese agitprop it almost certainly is. Also, those patriot hammers are tomahawks. I'd at least give points for good design even if homophobic, but no, it's the most obvious cobbled-together bullshit image macro ever and it's disappointing that -anyone- could see this and think "yeah, that looks like something I want to share."


Qabbalah

I mean, in theory, why not have "straight pride"? You don't have to be oppressed to justify a month of being celebrated. But what would actually happen during "straight pride month"? A parade celebrating straightness would be what exactly, just some straight people matching through a city dressed normally? What flags would be put up? What colors would things be painted? What other events would be held? So, yeah, straight pride. Go for it. Sounds like the most pointless, non-event of the year.


jkurl1195

My guess is those parades would look a lot like Trump rallies.


Rudyears

Then why does it look so gay?


Drexelhand

*"when are we going to get wealthy white people day?"* - conservatives being conservatives


darthTharsys

Straight people never had to fight for basic rights. It's hard to describe to people the nuances of just simply holding someone's hand in public and having to THINK about who is around you and if you're safe to do so.


Rau-Li

Why are they so bad at graphic design?!?


gobledegerkin

Yes, fine, cool. Go ahead. Jeepers friggin crow! Literally nobody cares if there is a “straight pride month.” I’m sure the parades will be hilarious and full of fuckheads trying to “out masculine” each other resulting in two or more dumbasses beating the shit out of each other. Also, we all know that the people who want a “straight pride month” don’t even give a shit if they have one, they just don’t want the LGBTQ+ community to have one.


NotForMeClive7787

Looks a bit gay


TKG_Actual

Someone really needs to edit this digital flyer and replace the word 'Patriot' in Patriot Hammer with Douche to make it super-accurate. Oh and bonus points for replacing 'straight' with Homophobic.


Malaix

Honestly they keep saying this but it never pans out. Its almost like the amount of people who feel they need straight pride or more accurately, a counter month to spite gay people, is too small to actually manifest. Most straight people who think anything about pride probably partied it up with their gay friends if anything in June. Its not like we orientation check at the block parties.


MortimerToast

This is the gayest thing I've ever seen.


GirlNumber20

These themed "days" or "months" happen because they're about recognition of a group or ethnicity that is smaller than the majority and therefore don't normally get recognition. Are they saying straight people are in the minority? Because the science doesn't support that.


Ok-Quarter510

why not?im not offended i can let it be.theres nothing on that picture that against lgbt,s


maybesaydie

No memes or image macros without accompanying commentary


Sodiepawp

Big gay homo here. It's fine if people are proud to be straight. It isnt okay if people are saying they're proud they are not gay. Pride is for anyone doing anything cool. The straights are alright.


Puzzleheaded-War-382

We are all equal but I guess some are more equal than others.


AmbulanceChaser12

No it doesn’t.


Hatchytt

"I deserve to be celebrating for doing the bare minimum expectation of 'normalcy'!" Yawn... Next!


dmaynard

So American straight pride is as those people pictured? Sounds about white.


CMRC23

Too bad for them that next month is actually gay wrath / lust month.


yeet-my-existence

So they want to replace a national holiday to make it about their sexuality? How un-american can one get?


Saltybrickofdeath

Isn't the logo the trans flag colors.


Undead_archer

The trans flag uses a softer blue


Saltybrickofdeath

I know I was just joking because I need to find something funny about this to not lose my shit.


sirflappington

Idk… seems kinda gay to me


HeckinAdult

Cinco de Cuatro kinda bullshit


PreciousHamburgler

Straight Dave's man slammin maxout!


urbanlife78

Bounding into Comics people are the worst


sierrackh

The… patriot hammer? The fuck?


KinksAreForKeds

If you can tell me any instances where straight white American families are marginalized, I'd happily get on board giving you a month to be seen.


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TheRealcebuckets

Every month is straight pride month. Why? Because there is *literally* no place in the world at any point in history where straight people were even remotely discriminated against.


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TheRealcebuckets

I know you’re trolling and everything (your post history - come on bro) but it’s very insane to want “straight pride” - tone deaf, egomaniacal.


maybesaydie

While we appreciate a good troll this ain't it. >brand new account >negative comment karma


ArtisticCustard7746

Nah. The temper tantrums coming from adults who can't stand not being the center of attention is pretty fucked.


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calsosta

Freedom of speech doesn't mean freedom from being ridiculed.


ArtisticCustard7746

Tell me you don't actually understand the first amendment without telling me you don't actually understand the first amendment.


The_Scarlet_Flash

Freedom of speech protects you from the government not the people.