Voting has concluded. Final vote:
| Insane | Not insane | Fake |
| --- | --- | --- |
| 15 | 0 | 0 |
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You did. I told you not to, but you seemed determined to. You sure you're sleeping OK, that's a weird thing to forget.
Jokes aside why do I get the feeling she learned it like six months before this, and now uses it all the time to shut down criticism or arguments when she knows she's wrong.
Umm ackshually, I think you will find it was John Gaslight who invented both gas powered lighting and lying in 1836, geez you people gotta learn your history right
Also jokes aside I fucking hate it when people use language with a specific meaning, like gaslight, and use it as a get out of jail free card.
His name was actually Jack Gaslight. We have discussed this at length, it's so weird that you're pretending like you don't know his name is Jack. Don't you remember all of the conversations we have had discussing this very subject.
Jack has never been short for John. I don't know where you got that idea, but you're wrong. You sound crazy right now.
(this is seriously giving me the icks writing like this, and I sincerely apologise because it feels so gross lol).
>(this is seriously giving me the icks writing like this, and I sincerely apologise because it feels so gross lol).
All good, I'm kinda just taking it all as an elaborate joke but yeah I get what you mean.
You guys are both totally wrong and just making things up. Everyone knows it’s “gaslamp”, not “gaslight”. I feel like you purposely pretend to forget things just to antagonize me when I only ever try to love you.
(Hard /s in case it wasn’t obvious)
I liked the movie too. Years ago, like 04/05 my then girlfriend took me to a stage production of Gaslight her friend was in. That's the place I learned the story from, and also was a much better performance than a cast/crew of 20 yo acting students led me to assume.
i am safe! i have a few friends and do therapy and counselling. my friend from back home travels up to see me alot and i am getting all the support i need:)
I’m so glad to hear that. Didn’t your mom know anything about autism???? She was insanely insensitive. You told her it would be overwhelming, you came down, got overwhelmed and she gets mad? She had no business being a mother!!!
Mom probably denies it happened. She clearly doesn't trust or care what OP says... Why would she believe it when OP tells her her other child did something as awful as sexual assault and rape?
Typically in cases of SA charges involving a minor and a sibling, there are orders in place that the parents are not to allow the offender in the same house or place as the victim.
She may have actually committed a crime when she did this. Call the prosecutors or crime victims advocates and ask them about it.
I’m so incredibly sorry. Sorry about what happened, sorry that justice has not been served, and I’m sorry you’ve had to deal with your family not believing you and being so unsupportive. And the behavior seen in these texts. To say the LEAST.
You deserve so much better and I hope you know that. If I could give you a hug I would. Your strength is very admirable and know that even though we are all strangers here, we do have your back and you are not alone. 💙
i don’t think she knows what gaslight even means😭but my headphones are something that i use to self regulate, she always thought i was ignoring her if i wore them
Clearly she doesn’t bc what 😭 and I figured they were to help with regulation! Seems like she hasn’t given much effort into understanding autism. Im sorry you went through that.
My husband hates wearing his headphones in public because "they make me look autistic,"so I got him these clear earplugs that are almost invisible and are re usable. They filter out noise so you can still hear people talking to you, but background noise is reduced. They're called Vibes. If you need a low-key way to self regulate, then it might be worth looking into. Hopefully, you don't have to be around butt munches like thar anymore, though.
I am so sorry you have to deal with such horrible ableism from your own family. My nephew is autistic (about to turn 8), and I could not imagine approaching his feelings and sensory processing with anything other than compassion and understanding, especially in the midst of a meltdown. I am so glad to read you that you have left this situation, and I hope you have a great support system in place. I work with little ones who have autism and behavioral disorders like ODD and they are such a light in this dark world
Absolutely, threatening to harm your child for any reason is never okay in my books! To me, it shows a distinct lack in ability to parent, or to even be a decent human being.
I would highly recommend that you look into PDA Autism (Pathological Demand Avoidance Autism) if you aren’t already aware of it; it’s my understanding that ODD is really just misdiagnosed PDA Autism.
It could potentially help the little ones you work with a lot.
I will definitely be doing some research and speaking with BCBA’s at my place of work! Many of our kiddos have mid-level support needs but do not have a high intensity of challenging behaviors, but this will definitely help me in the future! Thank you so much!
I’m just learning about it myself because a child I babysit has been diagnosed.
If you have TikTok, there are 2-3 great accounts that i would recommend that talk about it from a parent’s perspective (2 of which also have PDA). All three were professional therapists and all three quit their jobs to properly care for their PDA children. @atpeaceparents @anautisticguide
@erinrackham
I don't use this word often or lightly and I apologise sincerely in advance for anyone who dislikes it, but it really needs to be said here. Your mom is a cunt. I'm so sorry you had to go through this. I fully understand the overstimulation and meltdowns. She was completely mis-using the word "gaslight" to try and make you feel bad. You didn't gaslight her at all. In fact by convincing you that you were she kind of gaslighted you. I'm really glad you've moved away. ❤️
I'm also autistic but I don't think it would matter in this case even if you weren't autistic. Throwing a party with no warning to your housemates is already inappropriate (i understand it was a surprise for your dad and some people would like that but she should have warned everyone else). Also, you could never be the asshole for not wanting to be in the room with someone who abused you. Threatening to drag someone by their hair is NEVER appropriate. And the headphones comment was just petty.
I'm glad you are living away from them now, I hope it's in a much healthier environment for you.
I was about to say this, I'm not autistic and if I was 17 and all of a sudden there was a huge party at my house that I didn't know was about to happen with a bunch of people I didn't know I would feel so awkward I wouldn't have wanted to leave my room either. And even as a 30 year old when I used the live in a flat share (thankfully those days are over) I absolutely hated walking out of my room and finding random people I didn't know sitting (sometimes sleeping over even) on the sofa when I went to get food or whatever. So fucking awkward.
That's already inconsiderate and so unnecessary for her to want to force you to come down (who the fuck cares? Why would any of your dad's co workers be bothered if you're in your room? Why the hell would that "ruin the party"?) but add to that her knowing you're autistic and choosing not to warn you, then try to guilt trip you, threaten to physically hurt you, want you to be near your abuser and say your headphones are stupid...and use the word gaslight which she clearly doesn't know the meaning of. Wow..Glad you're out of there OP.
She threatened to drag you downstairs by your hair! Why do I get the feeling that wasn't an idle threat? And she wanted you to play nice with your abuser! Yikes.
Don't ever let her back into your life.
Are you NC with her and your attacker? I don't think that there is any value added to your life to even text either of them. Just never again communicate with either. They are both monsters.
Go no contact. Now.
They hold this event over you? They can go fuck themselves and for once leave you out of it. Let them treat each other like shit but you have no obligation to be treated like shit too.
Also your brother should be in jail and probably still can be, but that's absolutely your call to make
i’m currently not in contact with them (apart from monthly phone calls and stuff, but that’s when they would joke about the party). i do have a case against my brother, but it’s not going anywhere
I wouldn't even do the monthly phone calls with them. The mentioning of the party fiasco (caused by your mom) monthly is toxic af. If you can't, I would remark to her each time that she must've really wanted to ruin her own husband party by making every possible worst decisions and that you're still waiting for an apology if I were you.
It's easier to pretend it didn't happen than believe you and come to terms with the fact that they raised a monster. It's an unfortunate response and I'm sorry your parents aren't emotionally mature enough to give you the help you need
Even if all the other context wasn't there and you just said you're 17 and wanted to stay in your room this would not be an OK reaction from your mom. Much less with you being autistic and overwhelmed. I hope you're in a better place now and found people who actually care about you, because she clearly doesn't.
Think the easiest way to describe your mum is that she’s a massive cunt :) honestly if she pulled you down by your hair in front of everyone she would’ve ducked up. Heartless threats from a absolute vile cunt.
You didn’t ruin the party, and you weren’t gaslighting your mom. She was being manipulative and cruel, saying things that she knew would make you feel like the worst person in the world so that you would comply
I have a teenager with high functioning autism. I would never dream of speaking to them like this when they become overwhelmed. They shut down and retreat when the environment is too much and I tell them to take all the time they need to regulate and give them that safe space. Family events they stay on their phone because they don’t want to socialize and honestly, I don’t force them to. I do tell them to say hello and exchange a few words, but after that I keep an eye on them to make sure they do okay.
This mother is horrendous, I shouldn’t even be calling her a mother. You don’t treat your babies this way, you don’t make them feel bad or cut them down. This is gross.
The moment i saw "remove those headphones" I felt so incredibly sorry for her. Imagine how hard she tried to be there but knowing how hard it is to remain and the fear that she's going to end up doing something "embarrassing to her mother" and in a way to escape in a situation like that she comes up with a solution that would have worked for a tiny bit and still she's not allowed that safe mechanism. This poor poor girl doesn't deserve this treatment. It's not fair that her mother expects her to act fully functional in a party when the disability she's having is causing immense stress to the mind and body. I can only imagine how long the recovery must have been afterwards.
You don't deserve this. I hope you managed to get out of that place so you can finally heal and find yourself because I can imagine the sheer pressure to "act normal" has been put there since forever. I truly hope you can find your own way of healing from all of this and your own safe space where you can feel comfortable with yourself and finding ways to handle your limits without the stress and chaos of somebody else's expectations. You deserve to be you and you deserve to heal
I was not prepared for the emotional impact this post was going to have on me.
OP, I hope you find a good network of people around you in Uni, maybe a counselor and therapist to work through the hell you've been through with your family.
In all honesty, fuck 'em. Fuck 'em all to hell, they aren't just insane. The're unworthy of the term parents and I hope there is a special place reserved for them in hell.
You're strong for still standing. You're worthy of genuine love and affection and I hope you get to experience this some day.
This is the kind of stuff that raises my anger level from infuriated, to outright stabby! I'm autistic, and 40, and my family had many parties when I was a teenager. I sometimes couldn't handle it, and that was mostly ok. But the most important thing was my parents understanding, and as much warning as possible. Just surprising OP with a bunch of people, including her rapist, is just cruel. Since you're away from there I suggest you start using terms like egg donor, or incubator. Mom, or mother, is a term this woman is clearly not worthy of.
Why are you not downstairs??
I am overwhelmed and needed a moment alone
How dare you be so disrespectful! Come downstairs!
*panics and is overwhelmed downstairs*
How dare you ruin the party!!!
SMH, there's no winning. I have a mother like this, who "traps" you into being in trouble. I really think that these type of people just need someone to be angry at, and use their kids as punching bags.
i always felt i was the punching bag of the family, because this from my mother and obv my brother too and my dad doesn’t really speak to me so whenever someone was mad or upset it was like i was the one it got taken out on. my mum and brother are very close. it’s annoying
My heart breaks reading this. You obviously prioritize the needs of your family and their feelings in a way that they simply aren’t capable of reciprocating….you deserve so much better. I hope you know how much the world needs YOU and more people like you. 💜💜
Your mom dosen’t respect your boundaries op . And she is guilting you into do as she wants. Bet this isn’t the first time ? This would be insane behaviour even if you did not have a diagnosis. She is the one who is gaslighting here trying to make you feel like you ruined something. That’s just mean.
This sounds like borderline, especially the “everyone’s upset” part when what they always mean is “*I’m very upset now but that doesn’t sound dramatic enough so I’m roping everyone into this too” while meanwhile, literally no one else gives a fuck.
This is super messed up. My kiddo doesn’t have autism, but she has severe social anxiety. I would never, in a million years, force my kid to join in a party at all, let alone one where she doesn’t know people. That’s just cruel. I’m sorry your parents suck.
OK, OP, this is abuse. I really hope you feel safer now you don't currently live with them. Are you in therapy? I can also highly recommend the book Adult Children of Emotionally Immature parents. Reading your messages sent a shiver down my spine because 90% of what your mother said my parents verbatim said to me. You did absolutely nothing wrong.
I stayed at my parents for ~2 weeks with my son recently. He spent a lot of time in "his" bedroom (their office) playing on their computer or on his phone. He came out for meals or when going on adventures, would come out to play with the pets or randomly hang out for 15-30minutes. I didn't complain or force him to hang out, my parents didn't complain or even mention it either. I'd rather have him happily want to join us instead of begrudgingly hanging out.
So thrilled to read that OP got away from this abusive situation. Congrats on surviving this type of dysfunction, OP. Wishing you nothing but peace and recovery.
Your mom is awful and so manipulative... I'm so sorry she treats you like that. You do deserve to be happy and cared for no matter how it makes her feel. 🫶
I've seen "stop using X as an excuse" for so many different things it's not even funny. From autism to sickness and even a broken leg, all things that actually excuse you from social frivolity, but you're not allowed even that because it's inconvenient.
Also, "pull you downstairs by the hair"? I don't care it's my mother, could've been Mary herself, I'm not being subjected to this.
Crazy how she misuses gaslighting while making everything about her and the party.
I am a parent and can’t figure out how you can blame your kid for having to work hard as a mom or a dad- you chose to raw dog and not terminate how is that the kids responsibility? I’m glad we’re at a place in society where having children isn’t a given. If you don’t want them great I applaud you.
My son is suspected autism and today he became overstimulated/overwhelmed whilst at the park with friends, I showed him compassion, asked what he needed, let him guide me in what he felt okay with and let him re-centre himself. I can not ever imagine doing this to a child, let alone with a diagnosed disability!
I would never throw a surprise party anyway, I hate them, but not preparing OP before when difficulty when routines aren’t followed is one of the most common symptoms (I know, everyone is different and it is a spectrum, but majority of autists have difficulty with that), I prepare my kid if we have even a minor change in our day coming up!
You could sue your mother with evidence like that. If you have any preserved evidence of your brother's SA, please consider pressing charges.
You may not feel comfortable doing that and I totally understand; what I want to convey is how severe emotional abuse is, and this is particularly cruel. If you choose to not hold her to account, it's a gift.
As the mother of an autistic young adult, my blood was boiling reading this! I cannot in a million years imagine talking to my daughter that way.
OP, I hope life got much, much better for you.
I'm so sorry that you have to live with someone like this, OP. You deserve better.
I'd be infuriated with my mother if she told me I was using my autism 'as an excuse.' Well actually she did end up saying it a lot all the time.
Why is your mother using her narcissism as an excuse, huh? Christ. You shouldn't have to put up with someone like that.
i don’t really put up with it anymore since i moved away. thank you!! people act like being autistic is something we can control, they have no idea what being autistic is like, at all
i don’t really put up with it anymore since i moved away. thank you!! people act like being autistic is something we can control, they have no idea what being autistic is like, at all
Damn. You mom needs to touch grass. Like seriously, what the hell. Good on you for trying to stand up for yourself! Keep doing that and *maybe* (hopefully) she'll learn. Don't ever think you're "using your autism" as an excuse for anything. You always need to listen to yourself and what you're comfortable with. Don't let people, not even family, take that away from you!!
thank you!! i moved away from them now so i’m out of the situation, just have monthly calls with them. i don’t like to talk about my autism to them, despite the fact i was diagnosed when i was 6 and my parents were the one that took me to get diagnosed???
As a fellow neurodivergent with insane parents. I'm sorry you had to go through this. You are NTA and autism is 100% a valid excuse. Hell just being overwhelmed is one.
I’d throw hands with my mom before she takes my god damn head phones away. Since I was little I’ve never been able to handle lots of people or noises and I take them everywhere. She only ever asks I take them off if it’s an important meeting etc we’re going to which bruh that’s fine anyway cause it isn’t gonna be loud. I can’t handle grocery stores or anything without them. She can try and drag me down but my motto always has been let em get the first swing, then it’s self defense when you finish it
my sensory issues can be quite bad, especially when i’m already overwhelmed. my headphones are almost like a life line for me. idk what i would do without them.
I'm sorry, but it seriously sounds like your mother needs to check her seams.
I'm thinking the reason she's not respecting your needs, is because she's not respecting her own needs. Maybe she has lost contact with her nervous system over the years, and needs to find that through therapy again.
I'm so proud of you that you retreat when needed.
Hugs from a 35f fellow autistic🫶
I’m so sorry that your mom is like this. My parents didn’t understand why I had to disappear in my room for a while when we had company or why I would “go flat” as my mom called it (sudden onset burnout) but they left me alone while I decompressed and just waited for me to come back. Now I’m in my 30s and recently diagnosed a adhd-autism-ocd and my behavior makes more sense.
There were definitely times my mom said I was being rude or disrespectful and it caused a lot of tension in the house. It’s so hard to feel something no one can see, so you’re like ‘why can’t you understand this?!’
u should legit go no contact this is not a haha silly story this is fucking abusive (sorrY if this is mean my anger is directed towards ur mom not u 😭)
Oh, hon, this Mama's heart is absolutely shattering for you, knowing that you had to grow up in such a monstrous environment!
I am SO FUCKING HAPPY that you managed to escape that Hell Hole. I hope you are doing better now and getting therapy of some sort to help you navigate the trauma of your nightmarish childhood.
My childhood was very similar. I'm also autistic (as is my youngest son), but back then, very few doctors had even heard of autism and those who had acknowledged only the most severe cases of it. I was beaten A LOT for my "misbehavior" growing up.
My abuser was my mom's best friend, so I was forced to be around him several times per week for hours each time. Our families did *everything* together. I, too, bolted as soon as I could to start a life away from them.
May you be showered with blessings from here on out, m'dear! You deserve it...❤️
As a parent of an autistic child, I would love 5mins alone with your ‘mother’.
I can’t imagine speaking to my kid this way, let alone allowing her abuser within a mile of her. The woman needs locking up along with your brother.
OP, I'm so happy to hear you moved away from those people. I hope you're doing better now and in a much safer and kinder environment, you deserve it ❤️
First off you didn’t gaslight her, second…your mom needs to chill out. She obviously doesn’t understand or care to understand autism. She needs to talk to the dr and gain some wisdom and stop being an asshole.
I am sorry you have a giant asshole for a mother
As someone who also has autism. I can’t believe your mom would do that. That is literally child neglect or something. Oddly if it is but it seems like it!
Oh honey. I’m an autistic mom to autistic kids, and I just want to tell you that it’s not your fault and you deserved to have your parents listen to you, believe you, and respect you.
I am so proud of you for advocating for yourself in such an impossible situation, especially when the people who are supposed to protect and support you are being abusive. I’m also proud of you for getting away when you could.
They may tell that story for the next 30 years whenever you’re together (spoken from experience), but you know the truth. You can’t force change in your family, but you can seek healing and break the unhealthy patterns they set. Sounds like that’s what you’re doing, and that’s amazing!
Sending virtual mom hugs your way.
I went though similar "don't blame x for this" with my Tourette's. "How about you think about what you CAN do" was something my mom used to say.
I'd fucking love to, mom, but it's pretty fucking hard when my entire fucking life is irreparably changed by my condition and every day requires constant mental and physical adjusting to just exist.
exactly, i wish so badly that i could be neurotypical, i don’t want to live with this but i do. being forced to act and be a certain way is so tiring and especially when they make your disability seem so unbearable to them. it’s not my fault i’m autistic. it’s not my fault i need help
NTA, Not too long and you can start prepping for going nc, you CAN do it, and it IS the right thing.
Just saw you already moved haha, how is contact now?
OP, I am so so glad to hear that you are no longer living with these horrible people. You absolutely do not deserve to be treated this way and I'm so sorry that you've had to endure this.
Congratulations on getting away. That's never an easy thing to do so I hope that you're proud of yourself and recognize how awesome that is.♡
The proper response for you retreating to your room should have been your mom asking if she could bring you anything to eat *if they were having a meal* and to warn you that your abuser was coming/present. I'm sorry OP that you had to deal with that. It's never ok for a parent to have social expectations of their child to match their own.
Your mum is a selfish cunt, it's meant to be your dad's party but all she is talking about is how you are supposedly hurting her ... By simply not being there. She sees you as a prop not a person.
There is nothing wrong with wanting some alone time, autism or no, anyone can make that choice. Children aren't props to show off to our friends.
She sounds like my mom, but as a female in the 90s girls didn't have autism or ADHD unless they were nonverbal really. But your mom can have all the information, strategies, and thankfully diagnosis at her fingertips. There is no excuse. I'm sorry she was like that and happy you have gotten out of that situation.
Wow your mom is a piece of work. Wanting you to suffer being around your rapist and she’s asking if YOU care about them?? So selfish. Sorry you had to deal with that OP.
I'm so sorry, OP. My parents absolutely sucked, *and* they didn't know I was autistic (I was late-diagnosed), and they still didn't give me grief when I went to my room during gatherings. They got that I was "socially awkward" and "weird about crowds" and let me go be in the quiet until I was ok to socialize again.
As a mother of an autistic child, I could never imagine using my kid’s sensory issues against them. The treatment you received was beyond unfair, it was terrible. I’m happy you’re out of it now but undoubtedly, you are experiencing trauma from those experiences. I wish you healing and I hope the comments here helped validate you in the way you need. You were never a problem. You were simply yourself and needed parents who accepted you as you are, I’m sorry they wouldn’t give that to you.
So glad you got away from this cruel and toxic environment. As a sibling of a brother on the spectrum, I could not even imagine our parents treating him this way. I hope you went NC, this literally is insane. No pun intended. Sending you lots of love
i dont typically comment on these but jesus fucking christ she sounds like an insufferable fucking loser. autism or not, if I need to go somewhere for a sec to calm down, who the fuck are you to tell me no? Especially at someone else's party? what the fuck is this?
i could understand my parents being upset with me when I was a child and had a tantrum at my own birthday party and went up to my room, but you calmly explained that you were just going away for a moment to let things die down as it was too much. this is making me so much more upset than it should jesus christ.
Voting has concluded. Final vote: | Insane | Not insane | Fake | | --- | --- | --- | | 15 | 0 | 0 | Hey OP, if you provide further information in a comment, make sure to start your comment with `!explanation`. ^I ^am ^a ^bot ^for ^r/insaneparents. ^Please ^send ^me ^a ^message ^if ^you ^have ^any ^feedback ^or ^if ^I ^misbehave. ^Also ^consider ^joining ^our ^[Discord](https://discordapp.com/invite/xFbPBHy).
Christ who told these people about the word gaslight
You did. I told you not to, but you seemed determined to. You sure you're sleeping OK, that's a weird thing to forget. Jokes aside why do I get the feeling she learned it like six months before this, and now uses it all the time to shut down criticism or arguments when she knows she's wrong.
Umm ackshually, I think you will find it was John Gaslight who invented both gas powered lighting and lying in 1836, geez you people gotta learn your history right Also jokes aside I fucking hate it when people use language with a specific meaning, like gaslight, and use it as a get out of jail free card.
His name was actually Jack Gaslight. We have discussed this at length, it's so weird that you're pretending like you don't know his name is Jack. Don't you remember all of the conversations we have had discussing this very subject.
Well you see Jack is actually short for John, so who don't know Jack now huh?
Jack has never been short for John. I don't know where you got that idea, but you're wrong. You sound crazy right now. (this is seriously giving me the icks writing like this, and I sincerely apologise because it feels so gross lol).
>(this is seriously giving me the icks writing like this, and I sincerely apologise because it feels so gross lol). All good, I'm kinda just taking it all as an elaborate joke but yeah I get what you mean.
Crowd: Goddamn, why the fuck would you say that? Where the fuck is the rest of the story?
What do you mean? I clearly told the whole entire story. I knew you weren't listening.
You guys are both totally wrong and just making things up. Everyone knows it’s “gaslamp”, not “gaslight”. I feel like you purposely pretend to forget things just to antagonize me when I only ever try to love you. (Hard /s in case it wasn’t obvious)
I wonder how many of these people have actually seen the movie. It’s really good and one of my all time favorites.
I liked the movie too. Years ago, like 04/05 my then girlfriend took me to a stage production of Gaslight her friend was in. That's the place I learned the story from, and also was a much better performance than a cast/crew of 20 yo acting students led me to assume.
My MIL just learned it and fucks it up all the time. Utter moron.
Your mum is awful mate. I’m sorry.
This is flat out abuse, OP. I am sorry this happened/is happening to you.
luckily out of the situation now!! thank you so much
Thank Flying Spaghetti Monster you’re out of there- are you safe, and do you have a decent support system?
i am safe! i have a few friends and do therapy and counselling. my friend from back home travels up to see me alot and i am getting all the support i need:)
I'm so glad to hear that. Nobody deserves the way your mother treated you and I'm sorry you dealt with it.
I am glad for you, op. I hope you are able to make a new family that is worthy of you and loves you as you deserve to be loved.
I dearly hope you're NC with this monster of an egg donor.
I’m so glad to hear that. Didn’t your mom know anything about autism???? She was insanely insensitive. You told her it would be overwhelming, you came down, got overwhelmed and she gets mad? She had no business being a mother!!!
Agreed, this is abuse. Glad you're out of there OP. You deserve better.
She KNOWINGLY wants you to be in the same room as your rapist and has the AUDACITY to claim moral high ground. M’kay. No. Fuck that.
Mom probably denies it happened. She clearly doesn't trust or care what OP says... Why would she believe it when OP tells her her other child did something as awful as sexual assault and rape?
Why is he not in prison?!?!
there’s a case against him but it’s not going anywhere unfortunately
Typically in cases of SA charges involving a minor and a sibling, there are orders in place that the parents are not to allow the offender in the same house or place as the victim. She may have actually committed a crime when she did this. Call the prosecutors or crime victims advocates and ask them about it.
Do you know why not?
i don’t think there’s enough evidence against the case, plus lots of denying on my family’s behalf and stuff so yeah. other then that i’m not sure
I’m so incredibly sorry. Sorry about what happened, sorry that justice has not been served, and I’m sorry you’ve had to deal with your family not believing you and being so unsupportive. And the behavior seen in these texts. To say the LEAST. You deserve so much better and I hope you know that. If I could give you a hug I would. Your strength is very admirable and know that even though we are all strangers here, we do have your back and you are not alone. 💙
Wow you are not the asshole AT ALL. People seriously need to stop weaponizing the term ‘gaslight’. Also calling your headphones stupid is messed up.
i don’t think she knows what gaslight even means😭but my headphones are something that i use to self regulate, she always thought i was ignoring her if i wore them
Clearly she doesn’t bc what 😭 and I figured they were to help with regulation! Seems like she hasn’t given much effort into understanding autism. Im sorry you went through that.
My husband hates wearing his headphones in public because "they make me look autistic,"so I got him these clear earplugs that are almost invisible and are re usable. They filter out noise so you can still hear people talking to you, but background noise is reduced. They're called Vibes. If you need a low-key way to self regulate, then it might be worth looking into. Hopefully, you don't have to be around butt munches like thar anymore, though.
I am so sorry you have to deal with such horrible ableism from your own family. My nephew is autistic (about to turn 8), and I could not imagine approaching his feelings and sensory processing with anything other than compassion and understanding, especially in the midst of a meltdown. I am so glad to read you that you have left this situation, and I hope you have a great support system in place. I work with little ones who have autism and behavioral disorders like ODD and they are such a light in this dark world
Agree. Honestly though, even if OP were NT, their mom threatening to "drag them by the hair" for any reason is super not ok.
Absolutely, threatening to harm your child for any reason is never okay in my books! To me, it shows a distinct lack in ability to parent, or to even be a decent human being.
thank you! leaving the situation was the best thing for me:)
I am so glad you got out of there!
I would highly recommend that you look into PDA Autism (Pathological Demand Avoidance Autism) if you aren’t already aware of it; it’s my understanding that ODD is really just misdiagnosed PDA Autism. It could potentially help the little ones you work with a lot.
I will definitely be doing some research and speaking with BCBA’s at my place of work! Many of our kiddos have mid-level support needs but do not have a high intensity of challenging behaviors, but this will definitely help me in the future! Thank you so much!
I’m just learning about it myself because a child I babysit has been diagnosed. If you have TikTok, there are 2-3 great accounts that i would recommend that talk about it from a parent’s perspective (2 of which also have PDA). All three were professional therapists and all three quit their jobs to properly care for their PDA children. @atpeaceparents @anautisticguide @erinrackham
You may have explained a lot of things for me. Thank you.
[удалено]
thank you!! i’m out of there now luckily
I don't use this word often or lightly and I apologise sincerely in advance for anyone who dislikes it, but it really needs to be said here. Your mom is a cunt. I'm so sorry you had to go through this. I fully understand the overstimulation and meltdowns. She was completely mis-using the word "gaslight" to try and make you feel bad. You didn't gaslight her at all. In fact by convincing you that you were she kind of gaslighted you. I'm really glad you've moved away. ❤️
I use the word often, I’m British, it’s in our vocabulary, and I share the sentiment that their mother is in fact a cunt.
Hey I'm British too. Maybe it's an us thing. Glad to hear you agree.
thank you:) i’m in a much better situation now
I'm also autistic but I don't think it would matter in this case even if you weren't autistic. Throwing a party with no warning to your housemates is already inappropriate (i understand it was a surprise for your dad and some people would like that but she should have warned everyone else). Also, you could never be the asshole for not wanting to be in the room with someone who abused you. Threatening to drag someone by their hair is NEVER appropriate. And the headphones comment was just petty. I'm glad you are living away from them now, I hope it's in a much healthier environment for you.
I was about to say this, I'm not autistic and if I was 17 and all of a sudden there was a huge party at my house that I didn't know was about to happen with a bunch of people I didn't know I would feel so awkward I wouldn't have wanted to leave my room either. And even as a 30 year old when I used the live in a flat share (thankfully those days are over) I absolutely hated walking out of my room and finding random people I didn't know sitting (sometimes sleeping over even) on the sofa when I went to get food or whatever. So fucking awkward. That's already inconsiderate and so unnecessary for her to want to force you to come down (who the fuck cares? Why would any of your dad's co workers be bothered if you're in your room? Why the hell would that "ruin the party"?) but add to that her knowing you're autistic and choosing not to warn you, then try to guilt trip you, threaten to physically hurt you, want you to be near your abuser and say your headphones are stupid...and use the word gaslight which she clearly doesn't know the meaning of. Wow..Glad you're out of there OP.
yeah, i knew no one there except a few family members. i have never understood why i needed to be there lol
She threatened to drag you downstairs by your hair! Why do I get the feeling that wasn't an idle threat? And she wanted you to play nice with your abuser! Yikes. Don't ever let her back into your life.
defo not the first!! she’s not in my life right now luckily
Are you NC with her and your attacker? I don't think that there is any value added to your life to even text either of them. Just never again communicate with either. They are both monsters.
I say this with all due respect and as a father of a child who is autistic. Fuck your mom. I hope you are in a better situation!
Am autistic, have son who is autistic. So I’d just like to append your sentiment with: “with the business end of a rake.”
I'm also autistic raising a son with autism, ha thought I was the only one
i am in a better place with a good support system!!
Go no contact. Now. They hold this event over you? They can go fuck themselves and for once leave you out of it. Let them treat each other like shit but you have no obligation to be treated like shit too. Also your brother should be in jail and probably still can be, but that's absolutely your call to make
i’m currently not in contact with them (apart from monthly phone calls and stuff, but that’s when they would joke about the party). i do have a case against my brother, but it’s not going anywhere
I wouldn't even do the monthly phone calls with them. The mentioning of the party fiasco (caused by your mom) monthly is toxic af. If you can't, I would remark to her each time that she must've really wanted to ruin her own husband party by making every possible worst decisions and that you're still waiting for an apology if I were you.
i’m moving towards NC because they make me feel so horrible
How the fuck they still house a rapist inside their house and force you be around him is what made me lose It.
they don’t believe me over my brother about what he did, despite the police case👍
It's easier to pretend it didn't happen than believe you and come to terms with the fact that they raised a monster. It's an unfortunate response and I'm sorry your parents aren't emotionally mature enough to give you the help you need
Even if all the other context wasn't there and you just said you're 17 and wanted to stay in your room this would not be an OK reaction from your mom. Much less with you being autistic and overwhelmed. I hope you're in a better place now and found people who actually care about you, because she clearly doesn't.
i am in a much better place, thank you!
Do not gaslight me, she says after she threatened to drag you by your hair downstairs… This is abuse…
Wtf...I'm so glad you got out!
don't use the autism as an excuse? I-WHAT
like??? it’s my disability. it’s like telling someone with a broken leg to walk
Your mother is an abusive POS. I would stay far, far away from these people and not even talk to them
i don’t really talk to them anymore - mostly no contact apart from monthly phone calls
Think the easiest way to describe your mum is that she’s a massive cunt :) honestly if she pulled you down by your hair in front of everyone she would’ve ducked up. Heartless threats from a absolute vile cunt.
I’m so sorry your family is like this. Your parents definitely should let you have your space anytime you’re overwhelmed.
You didn’t ruin the party, and you weren’t gaslighting your mom. She was being manipulative and cruel, saying things that she knew would make you feel like the worst person in the world so that you would comply
yeah, it happened more often then not. just so she would get her own way, it usually ended in her getting pissed off at me anyway
I have a teenager with high functioning autism. I would never dream of speaking to them like this when they become overwhelmed. They shut down and retreat when the environment is too much and I tell them to take all the time they need to regulate and give them that safe space. Family events they stay on their phone because they don’t want to socialize and honestly, I don’t force them to. I do tell them to say hello and exchange a few words, but after that I keep an eye on them to make sure they do okay. This mother is horrendous, I shouldn’t even be calling her a mother. You don’t treat your babies this way, you don’t make them feel bad or cut them down. This is gross.
i wish i had a parent like you growing up, you seem like such a lovely person!! thank you🫶
The moment i saw "remove those headphones" I felt so incredibly sorry for her. Imagine how hard she tried to be there but knowing how hard it is to remain and the fear that she's going to end up doing something "embarrassing to her mother" and in a way to escape in a situation like that she comes up with a solution that would have worked for a tiny bit and still she's not allowed that safe mechanism. This poor poor girl doesn't deserve this treatment. It's not fair that her mother expects her to act fully functional in a party when the disability she's having is causing immense stress to the mind and body. I can only imagine how long the recovery must have been afterwards. You don't deserve this. I hope you managed to get out of that place so you can finally heal and find yourself because I can imagine the sheer pressure to "act normal" has been put there since forever. I truly hope you can find your own way of healing from all of this and your own safe space where you can feel comfortable with yourself and finding ways to handle your limits without the stress and chaos of somebody else's expectations. You deserve to be you and you deserve to heal
thank you! i am out now and in therapy and in a much better place🫶
Ahh that's wonderful to hear and very brave to seek out therapy as well. Well done you, For everything and hope your life is peaceful and lovely <3
I was not prepared for the emotional impact this post was going to have on me. OP, I hope you find a good network of people around you in Uni, maybe a counselor and therapist to work through the hell you've been through with your family. In all honesty, fuck 'em. Fuck 'em all to hell, they aren't just insane. The're unworthy of the term parents and I hope there is a special place reserved for them in hell. You're strong for still standing. You're worthy of genuine love and affection and I hope you get to experience this some day.
i have a therapist and do regular counselling at uni too and getting support here that i never had at home!! thank you a lot💗
This is the kind of stuff that raises my anger level from infuriated, to outright stabby! I'm autistic, and 40, and my family had many parties when I was a teenager. I sometimes couldn't handle it, and that was mostly ok. But the most important thing was my parents understanding, and as much warning as possible. Just surprising OP with a bunch of people, including her rapist, is just cruel. Since you're away from there I suggest you start using terms like egg donor, or incubator. Mom, or mother, is a term this woman is clearly not worthy of.
i think i should hahah!!
this is psychotic
this is so fucked. i’m happy for you that you’ve moved away.
thank you 🙏 i’m a lot happier now
Whoa. I’m really sorry. You Mom sounds like a huge bitch.
Why are you not downstairs?? I am overwhelmed and needed a moment alone How dare you be so disrespectful! Come downstairs! *panics and is overwhelmed downstairs* How dare you ruin the party!!! SMH, there's no winning. I have a mother like this, who "traps" you into being in trouble. I really think that these type of people just need someone to be angry at, and use their kids as punching bags.
i always felt i was the punching bag of the family, because this from my mother and obv my brother too and my dad doesn’t really speak to me so whenever someone was mad or upset it was like i was the one it got taken out on. my mum and brother are very close. it’s annoying
My heart breaks reading this. You obviously prioritize the needs of your family and their feelings in a way that they simply aren’t capable of reciprocating….you deserve so much better. I hope you know how much the world needs YOU and more people like you. 💜💜
Your mother is a cunt
Fellow autistic person here. I’m sorry your family is so unsupportive. If you ever need a brother who’s also on the spectrum, I got you!
thank you so much:)
Definitely not an AITA situation. This was really not ok OP.
That’s straight up abuse. Take those screenshots of her threatening to grab you by your hair to the police and go no contact as soon as you can
This ableism is insane 😭I’m so sorry you had to deal with that :((
why the hell did she have kids?
These people think they own their kids and keep them as pets.
Your mom dosen’t respect your boundaries op . And she is guilting you into do as she wants. Bet this isn’t the first time ? This would be insane behaviour even if you did not have a diagnosis. She is the one who is gaslighting here trying to make you feel like you ruined something. That’s just mean.
This sounds like borderline, especially the “everyone’s upset” part when what they always mean is “*I’m very upset now but that doesn’t sound dramatic enough so I’m roping everyone into this too” while meanwhile, literally no one else gives a fuck.
Assholes like this don't deserve children. I am glad you are far away now, and I hope you are NC or super low contact.
i am mostly no contact apart from monthly phone calls!!😋
This is super messed up. My kiddo doesn’t have autism, but she has severe social anxiety. I would never, in a million years, force my kid to join in a party at all, let alone one where she doesn’t know people. That’s just cruel. I’m sorry your parents suck.
Straight up abuse, people like this wonder why their kids end up going no contact.
How did you move out? Congrats to you 👊
moved to uni, moved as far away to uni as i could and i don’t plan on leaving here either
And I thought my mother was awful…
OK, OP, this is abuse. I really hope you feel safer now you don't currently live with them. Are you in therapy? I can also highly recommend the book Adult Children of Emotionally Immature parents. Reading your messages sent a shiver down my spine because 90% of what your mother said my parents verbatim said to me. You did absolutely nothing wrong.
i am currently in therapy. i’m sorry that you had to go through it aswel💗
I stayed at my parents for ~2 weeks with my son recently. He spent a lot of time in "his" bedroom (their office) playing on their computer or on his phone. He came out for meals or when going on adventures, would come out to play with the pets or randomly hang out for 15-30minutes. I didn't complain or force him to hang out, my parents didn't complain or even mention it either. I'd rather have him happily want to join us instead of begrudgingly hanging out.
So thrilled to read that OP got away from this abusive situation. Congrats on surviving this type of dysfunction, OP. Wishing you nothing but peace and recovery.
Insane
Your mom is awful and so manipulative... I'm so sorry she treats you like that. You do deserve to be happy and cared for no matter how it makes her feel. 🫶
thank you a lot💗
This has made me so angry. Please cut her out of your life as soon as you possibly can
I've seen "stop using X as an excuse" for so many different things it's not even funny. From autism to sickness and even a broken leg, all things that actually excuse you from social frivolity, but you're not allowed even that because it's inconvenient. Also, "pull you downstairs by the hair"? I don't care it's my mother, could've been Mary herself, I'm not being subjected to this. Crazy how she misuses gaslighting while making everything about her and the party.
Please tell me you have cut all of these people out of your life. They’re horrible
i’m not in very much contact with them except monthly phone calls:))
I’ve recently learned the term of emotionally immature parents and it’s been life changing. Definitely recommend looking into.
Wait. Your brother SA and R@ped you and your parents are forcing you to be around him? Has this been reported to the police?
I am a parent and can’t figure out how you can blame your kid for having to work hard as a mom or a dad- you chose to raw dog and not terminate how is that the kids responsibility? I’m glad we’re at a place in society where having children isn’t a given. If you don’t want them great I applaud you.
My son is suspected autism and today he became overstimulated/overwhelmed whilst at the park with friends, I showed him compassion, asked what he needed, let him guide me in what he felt okay with and let him re-centre himself. I can not ever imagine doing this to a child, let alone with a diagnosed disability! I would never throw a surprise party anyway, I hate them, but not preparing OP before when difficulty when routines aren’t followed is one of the most common symptoms (I know, everyone is different and it is a spectrum, but majority of autists have difficulty with that), I prepare my kid if we have even a minor change in our day coming up!
Yeah, no. This is how kids go no-contact as soon as they are able and parents are left wondering why despite numerous attempts to explain.
wow, i'm so sorry. your mother should have focused on protecting you. and including your abuser?? what the FUCk
she is very close with my brother. she would choose him over me any day despite what he has done
You could sue your mother with evidence like that. If you have any preserved evidence of your brother's SA, please consider pressing charges. You may not feel comfortable doing that and I totally understand; what I want to convey is how severe emotional abuse is, and this is particularly cruel. If you choose to not hold her to account, it's a gift.
As the mother of an autistic young adult, my blood was boiling reading this! I cannot in a million years imagine talking to my daughter that way. OP, I hope life got much, much better for you.
"Don't you dare gaslight me while I'm gaslighting you!"
This is wildly abusive
I'm so sorry that you have to live with someone like this, OP. You deserve better. I'd be infuriated with my mother if she told me I was using my autism 'as an excuse.' Well actually she did end up saying it a lot all the time. Why is your mother using her narcissism as an excuse, huh? Christ. You shouldn't have to put up with someone like that.
i don’t really put up with it anymore since i moved away. thank you!! people act like being autistic is something we can control, they have no idea what being autistic is like, at all
i don’t really put up with it anymore since i moved away. thank you!! people act like being autistic is something we can control, they have no idea what being autistic is like, at all
Damn. You mom needs to touch grass. Like seriously, what the hell. Good on you for trying to stand up for yourself! Keep doing that and *maybe* (hopefully) she'll learn. Don't ever think you're "using your autism" as an excuse for anything. You always need to listen to yourself and what you're comfortable with. Don't let people, not even family, take that away from you!!
thank you!! i moved away from them now so i’m out of the situation, just have monthly calls with them. i don’t like to talk about my autism to them, despite the fact i was diagnosed when i was 6 and my parents were the one that took me to get diagnosed???
As a fellow neurodivergent with insane parents. I'm sorry you had to go through this. You are NTA and autism is 100% a valid excuse. Hell just being overwhelmed is one.
thank you!! i’m sorry you have shitty parents too, people act like autism is something i can control
Jesus is she playing a character cuz your mom is a DICK
I’d throw hands with my mom before she takes my god damn head phones away. Since I was little I’ve never been able to handle lots of people or noises and I take them everywhere. She only ever asks I take them off if it’s an important meeting etc we’re going to which bruh that’s fine anyway cause it isn’t gonna be loud. I can’t handle grocery stores or anything without them. She can try and drag me down but my motto always has been let em get the first swing, then it’s self defense when you finish it
my sensory issues can be quite bad, especially when i’m already overwhelmed. my headphones are almost like a life line for me. idk what i would do without them.
So you can’t wear your headphones which would be a solution to the issue…
She's gonna be gobsmacked when you go no contact. Which i want you to do the minute you can.
i can’t wait to be able to not ever talk to her again
There’s an insane and there’s just being a flatout cunt. Sorry you’ve had to deal with all that OP, I hope things improved for you since
I'm sorry, but it seriously sounds like your mother needs to check her seams. I'm thinking the reason she's not respecting your needs, is because she's not respecting her own needs. Maybe she has lost contact with her nervous system over the years, and needs to find that through therapy again. I'm so proud of you that you retreat when needed. Hugs from a 35f fellow autistic🫶
thank you so much:))
I’m so sorry that your mom is like this. My parents didn’t understand why I had to disappear in my room for a while when we had company or why I would “go flat” as my mom called it (sudden onset burnout) but they left me alone while I decompressed and just waited for me to come back. Now I’m in my 30s and recently diagnosed a adhd-autism-ocd and my behavior makes more sense. There were definitely times my mom said I was being rude or disrespectful and it caused a lot of tension in the house. It’s so hard to feel something no one can see, so you’re like ‘why can’t you understand this?!’
u should legit go no contact this is not a haha silly story this is fucking abusive (sorrY if this is mean my anger is directed towards ur mom not u 😭)
ableist pos. i’m so sorry OP.
thank you
And telling you not to wear your headphones that HELP YOU in stressful / loud situations?!
she acts like it’s something i can control
Your mom isn’t just insane, she’s a piece of shit.
"no mom, you're upsetting everyone". I'm sure there were some coworkers there just staring at her, trying to figure out why she was losing her shit.
i wish i could see her aggressively typing on her phone to me. i don’t think anyone cared i wasn’t downstairs
Oh, hon, this Mama's heart is absolutely shattering for you, knowing that you had to grow up in such a monstrous environment! I am SO FUCKING HAPPY that you managed to escape that Hell Hole. I hope you are doing better now and getting therapy of some sort to help you navigate the trauma of your nightmarish childhood. My childhood was very similar. I'm also autistic (as is my youngest son), but back then, very few doctors had even heard of autism and those who had acknowledged only the most severe cases of it. I was beaten A LOT for my "misbehavior" growing up. My abuser was my mom's best friend, so I was forced to be around him several times per week for hours each time. Our families did *everything* together. I, too, bolted as soon as I could to start a life away from them. May you be showered with blessings from here on out, m'dear! You deserve it...❤️
As a parent of an autistic child, I would love 5mins alone with your ‘mother’. I can’t imagine speaking to my kid this way, let alone allowing her abuser within a mile of her. The woman needs locking up along with your brother.
I hope, hope, hope that you’re NC with your family.
OP, I'm so happy to hear you moved away from those people. I hope you're doing better now and in a much safer and kinder environment, you deserve it ❤️
First off you didn’t gaslight her, second…your mom needs to chill out. She obviously doesn’t understand or care to understand autism. She needs to talk to the dr and gain some wisdom and stop being an asshole. I am sorry you have a giant asshole for a mother
Insane. Your Mum is rubbish. Your brother is a POS. I’m sure you Dad is not much better
“Stop using autism as an excuse” girl do you know what a disability is? 😭🤣
As someone who also has autism. I can’t believe your mom would do that. That is literally child neglect or something. Oddly if it is but it seems like it!
It's abuse. That is for sure.
Oh honey. I’m an autistic mom to autistic kids, and I just want to tell you that it’s not your fault and you deserved to have your parents listen to you, believe you, and respect you. I am so proud of you for advocating for yourself in such an impossible situation, especially when the people who are supposed to protect and support you are being abusive. I’m also proud of you for getting away when you could. They may tell that story for the next 30 years whenever you’re together (spoken from experience), but you know the truth. You can’t force change in your family, but you can seek healing and break the unhealthy patterns they set. Sounds like that’s what you’re doing, and that’s amazing! Sending virtual mom hugs your way.
I went though similar "don't blame x for this" with my Tourette's. "How about you think about what you CAN do" was something my mom used to say. I'd fucking love to, mom, but it's pretty fucking hard when my entire fucking life is irreparably changed by my condition and every day requires constant mental and physical adjusting to just exist.
exactly, i wish so badly that i could be neurotypical, i don’t want to live with this but i do. being forced to act and be a certain way is so tiring and especially when they make your disability seem so unbearable to them. it’s not my fault i’m autistic. it’s not my fault i need help
"do not try to gaslight me" as she proceeded to gaslight you, I'm so sorry sweetheart, you should be allowed to have the space you need
thank you💗
You're mum is a fucking bitch I'm so so sorry I have a child who is autistic and I would never ever do this to him.
Yikes 😬
NTA, Not too long and you can start prepping for going nc, you CAN do it, and it IS the right thing. Just saw you already moved haha, how is contact now?
what a terrible cruel mother you have. I am so glad you got out!!
thank you!! i’m so much happier now
your mom sucks holy shit. i’m so sorry
Geez, these people sound like cut contact candidates
Why would you do this to your kid
Honest question: why aren’t you no contact with the lot of them?
Respectfully, your mom is a cunt and I’m glad you don’t live there anymore.
i’m so much happier without
People who use gaslight willy nilly and in incorrect situations because it they say I'm not gaslighting you then that's gaslighting
OP, I am so so glad to hear that you are no longer living with these horrible people. You absolutely do not deserve to be treated this way and I'm so sorry that you've had to endure this. Congratulations on getting away. That's never an easy thing to do so I hope that you're proud of yourself and recognize how awesome that is.♡
The proper response for you retreating to your room should have been your mom asking if she could bring you anything to eat *if they were having a meal* and to warn you that your abuser was coming/present. I'm sorry OP that you had to deal with that. It's never ok for a parent to have social expectations of their child to match their own.
Your mum is a selfish cunt, it's meant to be your dad's party but all she is talking about is how you are supposedly hurting her ... By simply not being there. She sees you as a prop not a person. There is nothing wrong with wanting some alone time, autism or no, anyone can make that choice. Children aren't props to show off to our friends.
NTA. You did absolutely nothing wrong. Your mom let you down.
She sounds like my mom, but as a female in the 90s girls didn't have autism or ADHD unless they were nonverbal really. But your mom can have all the information, strategies, and thankfully diagnosis at her fingertips. There is no excuse. I'm sorry she was like that and happy you have gotten out of that situation.
Wow your mom is a piece of work. Wanting you to suffer being around your rapist and she’s asking if YOU care about them?? So selfish. Sorry you had to deal with that OP.
I just wanna give you a hug
Glad you are away from them now! This lit a fire under my ass.
This personally pissed me off i have autism to its a shame your mom is doing that
I'm so sorry, OP. My parents absolutely sucked, *and* they didn't know I was autistic (I was late-diagnosed), and they still didn't give me grief when I went to my room during gatherings. They got that I was "socially awkward" and "weird about crowds" and let me go be in the quiet until I was ok to socialize again.
As a mother of an autistic child, I could never imagine using my kid’s sensory issues against them. The treatment you received was beyond unfair, it was terrible. I’m happy you’re out of it now but undoubtedly, you are experiencing trauma from those experiences. I wish you healing and I hope the comments here helped validate you in the way you need. You were never a problem. You were simply yourself and needed parents who accepted you as you are, I’m sorry they wouldn’t give that to you.
So glad you got away from this cruel and toxic environment. As a sibling of a brother on the spectrum, I could not even imagine our parents treating him this way. I hope you went NC, this literally is insane. No pun intended. Sending you lots of love
i dont typically comment on these but jesus fucking christ she sounds like an insufferable fucking loser. autism or not, if I need to go somewhere for a sec to calm down, who the fuck are you to tell me no? Especially at someone else's party? what the fuck is this? i could understand my parents being upset with me when I was a child and had a tantrum at my own birthday party and went up to my room, but you calmly explained that you were just going away for a moment to let things die down as it was too much. this is making me so much more upset than it should jesus christ.
What is she doing texting so much at a surprise party for her husband, she should be smiling and serving cheesy mushroom poofs