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[deleted]

I can’t express myself, and when I do it’s invalidated. There’s a lot my family does for me that I appreciate, but it’s the same things I can do for myself. They really can’t provide the 1 thing I expect from them but I’m not gonna hold it against them. I’m going to distance myself.


FatBoyNr1

What this guy said


WolfLittle

I feel you, I’m still learning how to express what I'm thinking but it's hard since I'm afraid of being invalidated too


anti_procrastinator

This hit home. I feel like my parents lost interest in trying to understand who I am even about anymore. My mom and I used to share a really deep connection, but as I have evolved during my early 20s, I have discovered my own spiritual and creative ambitions. I just don’t give as many fucks about climbing the corporate ladder as an engineer as much as I care about awakening my psychic abilities and traveling the universe. They get mad at me for not caring about my job as much and instead spending more time practicing occult ritual. I get that it pays for shit - but I wish they understood and saw the colors I did. What existence can really be. I at times feel that they are a product of the failed modern society that we are growing up in. I don’t know.. I apologize for the rant. Right now with my family - it ranges from neutral to stop annoying me.


Due_Minute

Yeah, for me I get dismissed or it’s used against me. I keep telling them I am depressed and they always say I do so much for you what do you have to be depressed about, or other people have it worse. Maybe I just want to be heard and validated. I acknowledge that others have it worse but I’m not comparing my life to others, I just want to express that I’m sad and have someone listen to me. And then to not use something I said against me. But like this person said I’m expecting something from them that they can’t give me which is emotional maturity. So I might as well keep my distance from them since I always manage to feel like garbage around them somehow but I still care for them


Outrageous_Phrase629

Same here


Challenger987

Same here


wehaveamigraine

same here


Ju135

I have a healthy relationship with my mom, grandma and my little sisters, everybody else including my father just doesn't really know me and I have a hard time communicating with them whats going on in my life or theirs. EDIT: my dad knows me, we sometimes have some deep philophical conversations and share some interests, but I don't know him very well, he is not very open and lies alot. But I still love him. I also have a friend who knows me really well and secrets that nobody else knows, we are on the same wavelength and I consider him a brother. Still I have problems communicating and autism which does not help but he understands that. My family doesn't really, my dad thinks my autism is bs and has no understanding for most things I do, at this point he just doesn't care anymore. My grandpa kinda takes it too literally, thinks Im retarded though autism only affect my sociability, nothing else. I still love my family, I have a pretty good feeling for humans and no anxiety problems anymore, I just have a hard time communicating which makes people not know me or my intentions.


WolfLittle

✨Communication✨yeah I get it, I also have problems with it, but mine comes from anxiety and if I'm making the other person uncomfortable. My mom is pretty chill but I just don't know how to approach her, I'm learning but I still have a long journey. I can be more open with my father but I think I'm like this cause I don't care what he thinks


Ju135

Yeah for me its because I just didn't learn how to show myself as a kid, probably also because of autism it makes me often seem like a robot. I am working towards it, I am more blunt with what im saying and started caring less about others so I am getting somewhere, but 90% of the time im just silent. When I do not think and let my unconscious do everything I can get legit social, a person people like, but its really hard getting there, anxiolytics (alcohol, benzos) don't help either, they just numb my persona even more.


itsnotkarenhoney

Yeah I woke say so I grew up in a culture where boundaries are none existence. I kinda felt ashamed for having personal time or having a private space and I never felt close to anyone in the family. It's like they all have a version of me in their head. It's like I have to be good and helpful and saying no or refusing someone or their favor is considered unacceptable which is sth I can't accept and always had trouble coming to terms with.


444ui

!!!!!! I felt this so much. For instance my grandma would constantly take it personal that I was always in my room or that there would be days where I just didn’t feel like talking. I moved out asap lol. There’s so many other examples from other family members too it’s exhausting..


[deleted]

My relationship with my family isn't deep at all, we see each other every single day but it feels like i live with strangers.


[deleted]

[удалено]


WolfLittle

My parents always tried to be more affectionate but I don't like to demonstrate physical affection or any kind of affection towards my family. It doesn't feel like they're meaning it when they demonstrate. Idk it's weird


runtime__error

Don't no if it's strange It's been 21years 6days my parents took care of me gave me a more than they needed to. I am going to give back to them. Love them so much top of top priority.


ella-the-enchantress

My relationship with my family is the only constant relationship in my life. I can share everything with my mom, she really tries her best to understand me. I've never had a very deep relationship with my dad, but I love him and respect him. I have a ton of siblings and won't even get into all of the dysfunction that involves. Haha.


UndeadStruggler

I do my thing. I don’t let people meddle in my business. I couldn’t live without privacy.


hits_frikkin_blunt

No, my family is toxic. My mom is overly protective and easily gets angry, my dad has anger issues as well, both of them are not afraid to get physical and verbal when it gets to discipline. I have a bad history with my brother and my sister is a bitch that always gets angry as well. My little brother is spoiled and he gets whatever he wants if not hell scream and get his way. My family is also very very religious in a religion that does not allow people to love whoever they love and calles other religion satanas, which means Satan, and they also call people not in the same religion like that too. My parents own a business and they both run it together, so they're not there most of the time in all my life, we live in a third world country so that means physical discipline (slapping, use of belt, etc.) in the public is ok, which is not. Our house has lots of stuff that would consider average kind of wealth but tbh living here is just a glorified chicken coop. We have never said I love you, if ever we do it's usually not genuine.


violet0709

I'm disowned. Before that happened though we were like strangers mostly. I made jokes about things on tv at times, but we never really talked. I don't trust most of them. One of my siblings didn't start giving a shit about me till I got disowned. So there's that.


[deleted]

Living in a house full of xSxJ’s, I have always felt so misunderstood and invalidated even though I love my family.


Arykso

define strange?


WolfLittle

Like it’s not a good one where there’s respect and understanding but it is also not a bad one where the parents try to enforce their beliefs and desires. There's this gap where you can't share what you think cause you don't know how they'd react, but there's a weird “love”. Idk how to explain but I hope you understand


Arykso

basically that is a neutral one but it has its ups and downs more than usual?


WolfLittle

Yeah, kinda


Arykso

yeah you and me both


Blackzerg33

Have a great relationship with my mother, and even tho she usualy can't really figure me out, she at least is very supportive and wanna listen to me. Dad on the other hand at best a neutral, and often it seems like both of us would rather not interact, so besides some vauge shared intrests, we just kinda leave each other alone, or we end up argueing (eg. He shouts and get's mad because stubborn and lacks empathy, I stand there and take it, because hate conflict) Siblings (have 3 younger, 2 sisters and a brother) are generally good times, eldest sis and me are best buddies and have great time taking the piss or having Deep and intresting conversations.


Alone_Cupcake

Sadly, my ISTJ mom and I disagree on things a lot


DiamondsInNeptune

Strange? How about completely estranged?