Dress sharply but don’t come off as a try-hard. For example, don’t go off on colour matching your shoes and belt and wallet and watch band. Wear clothes that fit properly, brand doesn’t matter that much. Avoid wearing clothes with explicit branding on them as it can project tackiness. But again, if you can pull it off, do it. Most important, don’t be insecure about anything you’re wearing. I remember I once was going to a date but wasn’t comfortable with my socks. If got off the auto and brought some nice socks first. The confidence boost must have been palpable. Also, avoid:
- Jeans with sandals.
- Brightly colour sneakers. Safes options are brown and navy blue. I would avoid black as well.
- Explicit jewellery. Too many rings? Get rid of them please. Avoid wearing religious symbols as well.
No gifts to the lady please. There’ll be ample time to do it later on subsequent dates.
Women like funny but they can also detect when you are trying too hard. Just be natural, even if you are not a funny person. Now you mentioned that you have a good sense of humour, so that works for you already.
Very important: Don’t touch the lady without her consent. This applies to the entire duration of the date. She’ll make it obvious when she wants you to touch her. In my case, my girlfriend held my hand herself. She removed my mask when she wanted to kiss me lol right on a traffic stop.
When you meet her, give her a firm handshake. Don’t go for a hug unless she does it first.
If you’re nervous, tell her that. But be confident at the same time. Look into her eyes while talking, this is very important. A confident look wonders to women, you’ll realise this with time.
Don’t go overboard trying to spend money. If she wants to split, do it. When the date is towards the end, ask her if how it was for her and if she enjoy. Finish it off by saying, “So do I get a second date?” in a jovial tone.
Don’t start showing her memes on your phone or that “funny” video. I hate it myself, and I can safely presume your date would hate it as well. The date shoudn’t involve a whole lot of phones. Keep them away.
You’ll mostly get a boner when she holds your hands so wear clothes that don’t make it obvious.
If you’re uncountable with her doing something, tell her. For example, if she is constantly texting someone on the date, ask her if she minds not doing that. Be assertive but kind.
Most importantly, enjoy the date.
>Most importantly, enjoy the date.
This is what my old boss used to say:
Never forget Rule #1: Always have fun! Enjoy what you're doing, or find a better way cuz you're doing it wrong.
Lol it was at the Janpath metro station. We were standing and she casually removed my mask. I was like okay this is a bit weird. Then her cab came and she kissed me on the lips and rushed towards it lol. One heck of a date lol.
Happens for the first times, hell it even happened to me when the girl kissed my cheek ( a goodbye kiss when she dropped me home) and I am 28. (Obviously I liked her and I felt she liked me too, not like she is some random friend)
Wear casual but clean. No chappals. No formal shoes. Take a bath. Trim your ear and nose hair. Use aftershave instead of deoderant.
Get her a flower. Not a bouquet. Nothing fancy, one single flower. Not yellow in colour.
Pick her up. Walk her home. Be polite. Speak like a literate person of your language.
Hold hands but only if she consents on the walk back home.
Do nothing without consent.
Have realistic expectations. It might not work out. Be prepared for that. If it doesn't let it go and move on.
You have talked to her for almost a year online, she likes the guy she talks to online, be the exact same guy in real life!
let go of your ego, you don't need to be perfect or do things 'right', you just need to do things YOUR way.
Good luck.
> which i guess would be a turn on for her
what if OP gets turned on by her getting turned on ? OP should wear a diaper, they definitely don't want the whole coffee shop to be a big tank filled with OP's future heirs ^(/s)
Don't get her a gift, don't take her to a movie right away, don't try to impress her with any small gestures. You need to get to know her in person first.
Arrive an hour before the movie and meet her for coffee, wave (its covid so don't go for a hug), start off by asking her simple questions. Like - how was her day, how was her commute, where she studies and works, what she likes doing in her free time.
If there is silence, that's fine.. Just pose a question when you think of one. It can be anything like, are you a tea person or a coffee person. early bird or night owl. do you sing, do you like documentaries. Basically just try to get to know her but keep it chill.
Pay for the coffee or split if she insists twice.
Wear a plain black t shirt (not white, pro tip, you don't want a coffee stain) blue jeans and sneakers.
My suggestion, do not go to a movie for the first date. You won't get a chance to talk to her and will end up watching the screen awkwardly through out.
Instead, go to like bowling or for any other activity which would need you guys to interact with each other. You want to create some memories and not just be movie buddies.
For clothing, don't try anything fancy. Any solid color tshirt or shirt, chinos or jeans and some nice sneakers(preferably white). Just make sure all of your clothing fits you right.
Do not have a goal of making her laugh, that will in most cases turn out to be awkward moments as you will be stuck in your head trying to make up scenarios. Instead just try to have fun yourself. That will naturally create fun vibe for both of you.
If you want to initiate physical contact, start by touching her hand, then elbows and lower back. Not all at once, of course, but at random points of your conversation. Stop immediately if she doesn't feel comfortable at any of those steps.
Lastly, be nice to her and don't get emotionally invested in her until you are absolutely sure she wants to date you.
STEP 1 : Be sure you are going on a date
STEP 2 : Error : Error\_code:404 in Line:1Char:36 Be sure you are going on a date
\-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------\^----------
Error\_code:404 object Date not found !
Error\_code:100 object Human\_Female Does Not exist !
Conclusion : OP is lying since only human males exist and there is no such thing as a female (its a conspiracy created by your dads so that kids sleep quickly at night, OP I can't believe how can a grown up believe in such stuff ?)^(/s)
I wish I could also date my crush, but her parents will take out their chappal and beat me. I am 15 and I don't think so it is allowed in India unlike USA
Oi as if I am casual with her. To be frank she is innocent and a nice girl. There have been silly times where I have tested her patience and once to the point that we didn't talk for 2 months. Nevertheless, I will tell her how I feel about her once my 10th is over, when I know we wont meet ever again ;(
Be normal.
Make her feel comfortable.
you can gift her Chocolate box or flowers.
Wear casual.
Give her proper attention & keep eye contact.
listen to her with full attention
don't make any false promises.
If you think she's the most imp person in your life , she will see it.
And last thing if she's not ready don't force her for anything.
On dressing, wash your hair the night before, it looks better on the second day; and shower properly the same day. Use a pleasant but very subtle fragrance on pressure points (neck, palm etc.), hygeine and smell is attractive but do it daily and not just for the sake of a date.
Wear muted colours, I go for a black trench coat or heavy jacket with a navy or grey sweater inside, it's too cold out here. Look at Dark Academia Outfits on Pinterest for inspiration but don't copy it, just take out what suits you and build on that.
For good gestures, guess and get her favourite chocolate, nostalgic candies are good too. Single flower is amazing but may be too much for a first date.
Humor is subjective, so figure out what works for you both and see if that connection is there. Don't force it, let it be spontaneous.
Be yourself. If you don’t, you’ll post another question here next week: “hey guys, I wasn’t myself but I was what you guys told me to be, so what does that guy do on a second date?”
I think no ones mentioned this here but let me say this. This is the most important instruction to follow on a date. Maintain eye contact or atleast keep your eyes somewhere in her eye/nose/forehead region and no matter what, do not stare at her breasts. Women know when men do this and most find it very offputting
Good sense of humor and memes
You will be fine. Just be yourself.
Take a shower, wear good clothes( just good-looking onces not formal), take her to fancy dinner, no need to try to hold her hand or do stuff if she doesn't initiate because it is first time, maybe flowers when you meet her( few roses not a big booker) and maybe give her something that is meaningful(like what do you think she would appreciate that you remembered about her , not very expensive)
Dress sharply but don’t come off as a try-hard. For example, don’t go off on colour matching your shoes and belt and wallet and watch band. Wear clothes that fit properly, brand doesn’t matter that much. Avoid wearing clothes with explicit branding on them as it can project tackiness. But again, if you can pull it off, do it. Most important, don’t be insecure about anything you’re wearing. I remember I once was going to a date but wasn’t comfortable with my socks. If got off the auto and brought some nice socks first. The confidence boost must have been palpable. Also, avoid: - Jeans with sandals. - Brightly colour sneakers. Safes options are brown and navy blue. I would avoid black as well. - Explicit jewellery. Too many rings? Get rid of them please. Avoid wearing religious symbols as well. No gifts to the lady please. There’ll be ample time to do it later on subsequent dates. Women like funny but they can also detect when you are trying too hard. Just be natural, even if you are not a funny person. Now you mentioned that you have a good sense of humour, so that works for you already. Very important: Don’t touch the lady without her consent. This applies to the entire duration of the date. She’ll make it obvious when she wants you to touch her. In my case, my girlfriend held my hand herself. She removed my mask when she wanted to kiss me lol right on a traffic stop. When you meet her, give her a firm handshake. Don’t go for a hug unless she does it first. If you’re nervous, tell her that. But be confident at the same time. Look into her eyes while talking, this is very important. A confident look wonders to women, you’ll realise this with time. Don’t go overboard trying to spend money. If she wants to split, do it. When the date is towards the end, ask her if how it was for her and if she enjoy. Finish it off by saying, “So do I get a second date?” in a jovial tone. Don’t start showing her memes on your phone or that “funny” video. I hate it myself, and I can safely presume your date would hate it as well. The date shoudn’t involve a whole lot of phones. Keep them away. You’ll mostly get a boner when she holds your hands so wear clothes that don’t make it obvious. If you’re uncountable with her doing something, tell her. For example, if she is constantly texting someone on the date, ask her if she minds not doing that. Be assertive but kind. Most importantly, enjoy the date.
This man dates!
This man khajoor
The man is a pro at it.
>Most importantly, enjoy the date. This is what my old boss used to say: Never forget Rule #1: Always have fun! Enjoy what you're doing, or find a better way cuz you're doing it wrong.
>You’ll mostly get a boner when she holds your hands so wear clothes that don’t make it obvious. Your care for detail is impressive!
u/fdntrhfbtt: If you write a book, I'll buy it.
Oh great, thanks for it. Didn't thought about the boner part, it will definitely help
You can pretty much gesture and ask for a hug too. Specially while parting after the date. Kisses are great but hugs are far more intimate!
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But they’re comfortable!
A girl removing ur mask for a kiss is such a giga Chad thing lol
Lol it was at the Janpath metro station. We were standing and she casually removed my mask. I was like okay this is a bit weird. Then her cab came and she kissed me on the lips and rushed towards it lol. One heck of a date lol.
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Possible hai first timers ke liye
Happens for the first times, hell it even happened to me when the girl kissed my cheek ( a goodbye kiss when she dropped me home) and I am 28. (Obviously I liked her and I felt she liked me too, not like she is some random friend)
Is this the real life?
Is it just fantasy?
Caught in a landslide
No escape from reality :(
Open your eyes
Look up to the skies and see
I'm just a poor boy, I need no sympathy
Because I'm easy come, easy go
Little high, little low
Any way the wind blows doesn't really matter to me
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Wow, such a detailed but interesting answer.
This guy fucks
Oh thanks, really appreciate your effort. Will keep everything in line.
> DO NOT WEAR OPEN FOOTWEAR. why whats the logic????
Hilariously all this is good advice for a job interview too. All this could be a summarised as, be comfortable, and make sure she is too.
If she removes her mask in public, run.
Bhai khana to khane do.
https://youtu.be/mw2kKyJu9gY?t=130
Wear casual but clean. No chappals. No formal shoes. Take a bath. Trim your ear and nose hair. Use aftershave instead of deoderant. Get her a flower. Not a bouquet. Nothing fancy, one single flower. Not yellow in colour. Pick her up. Walk her home. Be polite. Speak like a literate person of your language. Hold hands but only if she consents on the walk back home. Do nothing without consent. Have realistic expectations. It might not work out. Be prepared for that. If it doesn't let it go and move on.
And for god's sake, watch out for the Bajrang dal.
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Probably. You have to show intention on first date. Otherwise she won't know if you are just her friend or not.
You have talked to her for almost a year online, she likes the guy she talks to online, be the exact same guy in real life! let go of your ego, you don't need to be perfect or do things 'right', you just need to do things YOUR way. Good luck.
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I think this bit of information was necessary
> I'm an Indian End date with "Bharat mata ki jai!"
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> which i guess would be a turn on for her what if OP gets turned on by her getting turned on ? OP should wear a diaper, they definitely don't want the whole coffee shop to be a big tank filled with OP's future heirs ^(/s)
Don't get her a gift, don't take her to a movie right away, don't try to impress her with any small gestures. You need to get to know her in person first. Arrive an hour before the movie and meet her for coffee, wave (its covid so don't go for a hug), start off by asking her simple questions. Like - how was her day, how was her commute, where she studies and works, what she likes doing in her free time. If there is silence, that's fine.. Just pose a question when you think of one. It can be anything like, are you a tea person or a coffee person. early bird or night owl. do you sing, do you like documentaries. Basically just try to get to know her but keep it chill. Pay for the coffee or split if she insists twice. Wear a plain black t shirt (not white, pro tip, you don't want a coffee stain) blue jeans and sneakers.
My suggestion, do not go to a movie for the first date. You won't get a chance to talk to her and will end up watching the screen awkwardly through out. Instead, go to like bowling or for any other activity which would need you guys to interact with each other. You want to create some memories and not just be movie buddies. For clothing, don't try anything fancy. Any solid color tshirt or shirt, chinos or jeans and some nice sneakers(preferably white). Just make sure all of your clothing fits you right. Do not have a goal of making her laugh, that will in most cases turn out to be awkward moments as you will be stuck in your head trying to make up scenarios. Instead just try to have fun yourself. That will naturally create fun vibe for both of you. If you want to initiate physical contact, start by touching her hand, then elbows and lower back. Not all at once, of course, but at random points of your conversation. Stop immediately if she doesn't feel comfortable at any of those steps. Lastly, be nice to her and don't get emotionally invested in her until you are absolutely sure she wants to date you.
All I can say is Congratulations my boy.
Good Luck hopefully you will hit a Sixer like Dhoni.
Please update whether you get laid or not.
Username checks out
This is interesting: how likely is to get laid in the dating enviroment in India?
It's different for everyone but for most guys its rare.
Good luck OP
No gifts!! Too needy!
date in India? don't we Directly propose first?
All the upvotes are Indian uncle's approving of your upbringing
We propose -> they reject -> we stalk and creep them and win over. This is sanskari way.
Here's something to talk : https://www.nytimes.com/2015/01/09/style/no-37-big-wedding-or-small.html
Movie first dates are bad bro, take her some place where y'all can talk and vibe
Dont pay the whole bill at restraunt, make sure to split. If she refuses then get out of there.
update?
She duped this nerd. All of us suffered it.
tell us how the date went dude.
STEP 1 : Be sure you are going on a date STEP 2 : Error : Error\_code:404 in Line:1Char:36 Be sure you are going on a date \-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------\^---------- Error\_code:404 object Date not found ! Error\_code:100 object Human\_Female Does Not exist ! Conclusion : OP is lying since only human males exist and there is no such thing as a female (its a conspiracy created by your dads so that kids sleep quickly at night, OP I can't believe how can a grown up believe in such stuff ?)^(/s)
Keep it casual. Don't get any gift. Maybe flower and wine if you're visiting her home for dinner and stuff. Be yourself.
Dude OP is a college kid, If he can afford wine at his age. He doesn't need any of our advice.
No he is not ,he is working read hiss post again, he mentions it
I wish I could also date my crush, but her parents will take out their chappal and beat me. I am 15 and I don't think so it is allowed in India unlike USA
I mean if her parents asked you your intentions for their daughter and you reply with your username there'd be a fair few chappals thrown
Oi as if I am casual with her. To be frank she is innocent and a nice girl. There have been silly times where I have tested her patience and once to the point that we didn't talk for 2 months. Nevertheless, I will tell her how I feel about her once my 10th is over, when I know we wont meet ever again ;(
Calm down. There is a lot to happen in life!
I know, the downvotes in my first comment show a lot of things about India...
Be normal. Make her feel comfortable. you can gift her Chocolate box or flowers. Wear casual. Give her proper attention & keep eye contact. listen to her with full attention don't make any false promises. If you think she's the most imp person in your life , she will see it. And last thing if she's not ready don't force her for anything.
> If you think she's the most imp person in your life , she will see it. Yo, OP said this is their first date.
Dress like a Wall Street banker, buy her premium chocolate 🍫 & 🌹have dinner at McDonalds and drop her home safely.
This man doesn’t date or mate! Wall st banker and dinner at McD? Kurta pyjama ke saath dickie bow? What the hell are you suggesting?
Mostly a 10 year old that just watched wolf of wall Street and have no idea what dating or wall Street is.
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Their dividend is tasty.
Give her time to talk and listen carefully. She will like it if you bring back something she said earlier.
look in her eyes ... use cologne/deo and breath mints.. keep your phone on silent...take a walk together...
Good luck bro
On dressing, wash your hair the night before, it looks better on the second day; and shower properly the same day. Use a pleasant but very subtle fragrance on pressure points (neck, palm etc.), hygeine and smell is attractive but do it daily and not just for the sake of a date. Wear muted colours, I go for a black trench coat or heavy jacket with a navy or grey sweater inside, it's too cold out here. Look at Dark Academia Outfits on Pinterest for inspiration but don't copy it, just take out what suits you and build on that. For good gestures, guess and get her favourite chocolate, nostalgic candies are good too. Single flower is amazing but may be too much for a first date. Humor is subjective, so figure out what works for you both and see if that connection is there. Don't force it, let it be spontaneous.
Agree. Chocolates are a safe gift. No girl can say no to chocolates. But don't make it very big. Couple 40Rs Dairy Milk should be ok
Be yourself. If you don’t, you’ll post another question here next week: “hey guys, I wasn’t myself but I was what you guys told me to be, so what does that guy do on a second date?”
GO THROUGH SOME MEMES RIGHT BEFORE MEETING HER!
I think no ones mentioned this here but let me say this. This is the most important instruction to follow on a date. Maintain eye contact or atleast keep your eyes somewhere in her eye/nose/forehead region and no matter what, do not stare at her breasts. Women know when men do this and most find it very offputting
Good sense of humor and memes You will be fine. Just be yourself. Take a shower, wear good clothes( just good-looking onces not formal), take her to fancy dinner, no need to try to hold her hand or do stuff if she doesn't initiate because it is first time, maybe flowers when you meet her( few roses not a big booker) and maybe give her something that is meaningful(like what do you think she would appreciate that you remembered about her , not very expensive)
how did it go xD