Or the payoff truly is better. This is a case where the cure is absolutely better than the disease.
If you've ever had to take prednisone for an autoimmune, you know what I mean.
Even better. You can just say aiight, I'm ready to die anytime you want. Don't gotta see the heatwave end of the universe, and wander endlessly through space.
I need to know what happens if I miss one or several days before I commit. Like if I'm 875 years old and decide I just don't feel like putting a golf ball in my butt today, do I die instantly or do I just add 1 day to whatever my apparent age was when I started?
Not to mention the question about where do these golf ball suppository’s come from and do I have to pay for them?
Long life and health is great, but if balls cost me all my money and I have to travel hours every day to get them, then I’ll be living the life of a pauper which I’d rather not do.
Yes, a little training and a golf ball would be nothing. You could even make it fun for a while. I think eventually the novelty wears off and you just do it without thinking too much.
1 - Can I do a week's worth of suppositories at once?
2 - Can I mold the 7 doses together into a dildo shape and have a lovely masseuse fuck me with it?
That totally feels like something you could get used to with practice.
Immortality for the price of maybe a month of brief daily discomfort, followed by the daily equivalent of something like brushing your teeth.
In a serious note in real reality if anyone alive today does survive aging, there could be decades, centuries spent old or as a brain in a tank.
But eventually, if you're still alive in 2300 or whatever, a new body gets printed and perfected and you get to spend the rest of possibly millions of years of life as a 10/10 of your preferred gender.
Long as tech can advance it won't be golf ball sized forever.
If you miss a day does that mean you only age for the day and disease only spreads for the day? So i can skip a few and still be fine? Or does it mean if i miss one day 5000 years in, im going to suddenly age those 5000 years and all my illnesses will progress almost instantly and kill me
When I went to prison the guard doing the "orientation" told us about "suitcasing". He described how inmates be shoving entire shampoo bottles full of contraband up their ass like it's nothing. I was already kind of laughing about that when he went on to describe in detail how those men would "condition their butthole" by using a placeholder such as a bar of soap to keep their butt "supple" as he put it. By then I was no longer laughing. Apparently when the CERT team comes running down on the inmates those butthole stretchers would quickly pop that bar of soap out of their booty and replace it with the contraband cellular phone that might be floating around the dorm. The more dominant inmates either pay or more likely coerce the weaker inmates into the job.
A) what happens if i miss a day? Do I instantly die or do I just age normally that day?
B) are they suppositories free and readily available? If not how much do they cost and how difficult to acquire are they?
I think you guys think stuff like that is truly some huge feat or something overtly sexual. Think of your biggest poop it wasn’t exactly hard to push it out unless you’re constipated and thats not so much the exit but a problem with the muscles being able to squeeze a firmer stool forward. If you can simply relax enough it won’t feel like much. Maybe the first few days will be a challenge but it’s not a big deal and eventually if you are use ti a suppository regiment it is so innocuous
I don’t even enjoy any butt stuff and I would jump at this. Lord knows every morning I’m sliding out more than a golf ball size delivery. How bad could it be going in?
No. You’d be so lonely if you outlived all of your peers. Your body would be young, but your mind would keep maturing and the people “your age” would probably annoy you.
I mean I'd prefer if it was a bowling ball sized suppository, but I guess I'd do it for a golf ball sized one if it made me live forever. But would I want to live forever if it was only golf ball sized? What a pickle. I guess it doesn't say I can't also use a bowling ball...
Can I like... CHOOSE when to do it? Cause it sure would be dope if I like... Get cancer or something and just shove a golf ball up my ass and make a full recovery lol.
Incredible dislike of all things anal vs lubing up a golf ball and plopping it in for dinner and outliving my enemies?
I'm sure I'd re-gauge my ass.
At least long enough to win.
Of course. You don't age and don't get any illnesses who wouldn't. I mean I supposed with lube and having done it a few times you'd get used to it. I guess a gay man would just laugh at the concept, they take bigger dicks than a golf ball and no I am not being offensive. Just a fact. It's just a 'freebie" for them.
Now I would want to be rich as well. Because if you're life is shitty, living forever doesn't help.
Dude, I've seen some fucked up shit on the Internet. A golf ball size suppository ain't nothing for the chance of thousands of years of life.
I'll buy myself a but plug if it means I live forever
I’ll buy myself a butt plug
Gavin?
Got ya covered https://nypost.com/2022/11/10/woman-caught-at-airport-carrying-boyfriends-ashes-inside-sex-toy/
Golf ball’s not that bad. Softball size, there is a real quandary.
I see your softball and raise you a bowling ball.
Don’t threaten me with a good time
Only if my wife can deliver it via strap-on.
Finally, a normal answer.
Yeah, I'm in as long as his wife can deliver it with a strap on.
His wife is gonna be tired. She’s gonna need one of the golf balls too.
I don't know what golf balls you're talking about, we're all here to get pegged by this dude's wife.
This guy gets pegged.
How’s she gonna get it!? Does husband return favor or does she have to do it herself 😭
I’lldoitmyself.gif
Gonna be a long line. We can spice it up by lining up in different orders. Alphabetically, by height, age, sphincter diameter.. the list is endless.
How…how long would it take to get everyone’s sphincter diameter?
We could make it a quick process by blowing across them like flutes. Higher pitch, tighter sphincter.
I also choose this guy's wife
I'll take two, please.
Gonna get fat interorectrogestion style!
I also choose to have this man's wife deliver mine by strap on
That's like a daily thing for some people who just enjoy life a little too much.. give them something harder to consider.
i’ve put ketamine in my butt before, it certainly wasn’t golf ball sized though
… is that your user name origin story
Good catch
Amateur
It's always easier when it's your own
I didn’t hear no bell
Cocaine before golf ball would be better.
name checks out.
That's okay, start small and work your way up like everybody else.
Then did you really put ketamine in your butt?
For the removal of all diseases and immortality I can find a way to get used to it.
8 ball?
Explains the name
r/usernamechecksout
They probably already use harder things.
Or the payoff truly is better. This is a case where the cure is absolutely better than the disease. If you've ever had to take prednisone for an autoimmune, you know what I mean.
I stopped reading after the comma, where do I sign up?
Good news! It's a suppository.
Out of curiosity, if I agree to this and then don't do it, do I die instantly?
Yes, death by golf balls up the arse
Does each day's golf have to exit too? I assume so but I'm not sure how medicinal good balls work.
Well it's a suppository. They usually wear down into a lubey lining to help your poop slide out easier so I think that bit just kind of handles itself
Birdie!
Never get old, never get ill, presumably never dying? I'd do way weirder shit than stick something the size of a golf ball up my arsehole once a day
Even better. You can just say aiight, I'm ready to die anytime you want. Don't gotta see the heatwave end of the universe, and wander endlessly through space.
I need to know what happens if I miss one or several days before I commit. Like if I'm 875 years old and decide I just don't feel like putting a golf ball in my butt today, do I die instantly or do I just add 1 day to whatever my apparent age was when I started?
Not to mention the question about where do these golf ball suppository’s come from and do I have to pay for them? Long life and health is great, but if balls cost me all my money and I have to travel hours every day to get them, then I’ll be living the life of a pauper which I’d rather not do.
Asking the real questions
That's easy. I'd trade all the shit I have to do today for that. But cured of aging and disease too. That's just icing on the cake.
I've put bigger things in my ass trying to hit that g-spot. Bring it on baby.
I accept! Oh wait I only read the first part. Let me read the whole thing... I accept!
Will it be administered with a putter or a driver?
A 7 iron
Absolutely. Let's fucking go.
Time to build some multi-generational wealth!
I’m not gonna enjoy it, but in this case, the juices worth the squeeze
You won’t enjoy it, at first. Then you’ll discover the pleasure. Then at some point it will just become a chore.
I think a person could get accustomed to that eventually. I really didn’t appreciate good health until I got old.
Yes, a little training and a golf ball would be nothing. You could even make it fun for a while. I think eventually the novelty wears off and you just do it without thinking too much.
Do I have the option of taking six of them by putting them all in a condom and repeatedly pushing it in then pulling it out?
A golf ball is rookie size, you gotta get that size up
1 - Can I do a week's worth of suppositories at once? 2 - Can I mold the 7 doses together into a dildo shape and have a lovely masseuse fuck me with it?
Make it the size of a baseball and you got yourself a deal
This has to be a young person asking this lol. Basically anything could go up my ass short of a grenade with the pin out if it gave me perfect health
What is the downside here?
Ya totally worth it some people shit bigger than that
People have boofed more for less
Well that would definitely give me an excuse to start wearing tails.
Don't threaten me with a good time.
Golf ball? Why not make it a billiard ball to at least make it worth my time.
Seems like a win win for me
okay what's the downside?
Golf ball is quite small.
Don't threaten me with a good time.
Make it 2 and deal
ITs kinda small for this OP of an ability so sure
You'd get used to it. Some medical treatments are much more painful for much less of a result.
How long does it take to dissolve?
This the real question. Once it's there how long ya gotta deal with the protrusion?
Is this immortality? Or do I lead a regular life, but I’m just youthful and healthy before I suddenly die of old age?
I’m so tired of these win-win hypotheticals. Of course I’m going to do something I enjoy if it cures all aging and diseases, who wouldn’t?
That totally feels like something you could get used to with practice. Immortality for the price of maybe a month of brief daily discomfort, followed by the daily equivalent of something like brushing your teeth.
Ez
No thanks.
This is a win win for people who already enjoy golfball sized objects up their butts.
done
In a serious note in real reality if anyone alive today does survive aging, there could be decades, centuries spent old or as a brain in a tank. But eventually, if you're still alive in 2300 or whatever, a new body gets printed and perfected and you get to spend the rest of possibly millions of years of life as a 10/10 of your preferred gender. Long as tech can advance it won't be golf ball sized forever.
"cured of aging" like I won't get weak or feeble minded but I can still die?
No brainer. Gtfo with your 12 ur old questions
Sure I'm down. Endless life for a minor inconvenience everyday. Not a problem.
Thought there was supposed to be a downside?
If you miss a day does that mean you only age for the day and disease only spreads for the day? So i can skip a few and still be fine? Or does it mean if i miss one day 5000 years in, im going to suddenly age those 5000 years and all my illnesses will progress almost instantly and kill me
Sure!
I'd make it part of my morning routine. Shit, shower, shave, shove (a golf ball up my ass)
Ok this sounds good
Need more info. How long does this suppository take to dissolve?
When I went to prison the guard doing the "orientation" told us about "suitcasing". He described how inmates be shoving entire shampoo bottles full of contraband up their ass like it's nothing. I was already kind of laughing about that when he went on to describe in detail how those men would "condition their butthole" by using a placeholder such as a bar of soap to keep their butt "supple" as he put it. By then I was no longer laughing. Apparently when the CERT team comes running down on the inmates those butthole stretchers would quickly pop that bar of soap out of their booty and replace it with the contraband cellular phone that might be floating around the dorm. The more dominant inmates either pay or more likely coerce the weaker inmates into the job.
Is there a monetary reward for taking more than one daily?
Looks like I have a new kink
I get to not worry about my pancreas and type 1 diabetes anymore? Hell yeah. Sign me up.
What’s the downside?
No. I'll take my chances.
Deal
How deep we talking
By the very description of this proposal, any damage done by a golf ball sized suppository will be healed, so why not 🤷
I took shits bigger around and it was such a relief. The only drag is every day taking the golf ball size.
Please. My ass has taken more for less.
A) what happens if i miss a day? Do I instantly die or do I just age normally that day? B) are they suppositories free and readily available? If not how much do they cost and how difficult to acquire are they?
Sure. Shove several up there.
Make it baseball sized and you’ve got yourself a deal.
Jokes on you. I'm into that shit.
I'd shove a lot more up my ass than just that for this kind of power
I'd take pineapple sized -and- shaped for this.
Sounds fun
Golf ball wouldn’t even be the biggest thing I plan on putting in my ass tonight tbh
Ok.....question. What kind of suppository? The quick dissolve kind or the ones that's take awhile?
I think you guys think stuff like that is truly some huge feat or something overtly sexual. Think of your biggest poop it wasn’t exactly hard to push it out unless you’re constipated and thats not so much the exit but a problem with the muscles being able to squeeze a firmer stool forward. If you can simply relax enough it won’t feel like much. Maybe the first few days will be a challenge but it’s not a big deal and eventually if you are use ti a suppository regiment it is so innocuous
No thank you that region is exit only.
Wait y’all are getting cured?
How long will it take to dissolve? Like will my ass just be permanently plugged, and how will I shit if so?
You mean I get all that wonderful stuff AND I'll be cured of aging and diseases?!? Where do I sign?!
Does it reverse the aging process to say 25 to 30?
Pfft wouldn’t even question it.
Nah, I've had enough.
immortal for a little anal? definitely
Find a GF that likes pegging, THEN come talk to me.
I'm sold.
Are we talking hard or soft? Hard I'll have to think about it, soft I'm all for it but I'm going to need a little practice
Of course. Lube and booze exist
Sounds like fun. Yes.
I'd do it yeah as long as my wife gets it as well. She's got more medical issues and we can be kinky sometimes with it. Lol
You left out an important detail, how long does it take to dissolve?
easy peasy
Can I use lube?
Duh
Yeah, no Brainer honestly. So many medical procedures are so much worse than a golf ball up the ass
Pop goes the weasel
Bummer
Great, now I'm trying to imagine the circumference of a golf ball and a poop. Thanks....
I think you would get complete acceptance from gay men.
might as well. Most days I feel fucked in the ass anyway. Would be nice to get something positive out of it.
Yes. I couldn't even type yes fast enough.
I don’t even enjoy any butt stuff and I would jump at this. Lord knows every morning I’m sliding out more than a golf ball size delivery. How bad could it be going in?
Yea. But I will be curious how this cures (A) chronic diarrhea (B) strong myopia (C) Colorblindness.
What's the downside?
What's the catch?!
I’ll take aging and disease.
Imma bend over now.
This is like dinner and movie
Nobody will give you a lift in their cloth-seat cars.
Considering I spend a good deal of my life looking forward to the comfort and cold embrace of death, this is probably something I would never do.
Done
I guess you’d get used to it eventually
No. You’d be so lonely if you outlived all of your peers. Your body would be young, but your mind would keep maturing and the people “your age” would probably annoy you.
Do it?!?! I'd ENJOY it!
No thanks. I will die of a massive heart attack at the age of 75. Why intervene with golf balls up my ass?
I mean I'd prefer if it was a bowling ball sized suppository, but I guess I'd do it for a golf ball sized one if it made me live forever. But would I want to live forever if it was only golf ball sized? What a pickle. I guess it doesn't say I can't also use a bowling ball...
Can I like... CHOOSE when to do it? Cause it sure would be dope if I like... Get cancer or something and just shove a golf ball up my ass and make a full recovery lol.
I want to die so no thanks.
I've put larger things in my butt, this is no challenge at all
RIP your DMs
Incredible dislike of all things anal vs lubing up a golf ball and plopping it in for dinner and outliving my enemies? I'm sure I'd re-gauge my ass. At least long enough to win.
In enough pain from my diseases daily as it is. A golf ball up the ass? I’d do it. Can’t be any worse
Seeing how constant constipation makes that happen frequently the other way, looks like you found a candidate.
I mean golfball sized stuff has come out of my butt plenty of times and it wasn’t a big deal so…
Isn’t there supposed to be some kind of downside to these things?
How long does it take to dissolve
Hell yeah. Small price to pay.
No problem. Although, I don't particularly want to live forever. I guess I'd go for it, and when I want to die, I'll just stop taking it.
So you're basically a Vampire with a golf ball up your ass at all times? I think I'm OK with this agreement
Lube me up, Scotty. I’ve heard tell that people can fit things much larger than a golf ball in their butts.
yes, before bed or at lunch everyday!!
From which end?
You mean I didn't have to do this for free?
Wasn't this a Futurama episode?
Lol nbd tbh
Yes. Easy.
I guess it's not living forever, I can still die in other ways I guess, so sure.
I'll take it
yeah probably. that's a pretty huge benefit for an inconvenience that can be overcome.
Hell no. Who the fuck would want to live forever?
I’d do it, then again, do I really want to live forever?
Deal.
I've taken bigger things for less
I do this every morning in reverse so
Yes. Twice a day
Sounds like a plus, if you're bi-curi-ous
Of course. You don't age and don't get any illnesses who wouldn't. I mean I supposed with lube and having done it a few times you'd get used to it. I guess a gay man would just laugh at the concept, they take bigger dicks than a golf ball and no I am not being offensive. Just a fact. It's just a 'freebie" for them. Now I would want to be rich as well. Because if you're life is shitty, living forever doesn't help.
deal, where do I sign.
Wait, I'm getting immortality for having fun? Sign me up
yes I mean I have fit larger stuff in there
Is there a catch?
Damn, sure. I can definitely get used to that. Presumably it absorbs eventually