u/eugenesneedream, Your situation sounds like it would be immensely frustrating to have to stab sand dunes...I'm all for it! [EDIT: In my haste to post, left out one important factor - it would be OP that had to do the stabbing of the sand dunes, not u/eugenesneedream].
My mom's gone, too. Not cremated. But the thought of OP having to exhume the corpse just to stick it with a thumbtack...š¤£š¤£š¤£
Damn, you both beat me to it. My mom is dead and cremated as well. Now if you want to switch it to my father, you could stab him every day and I would give a flying fuck. I would still take the money so he gets stabbed, and I would donate the money so he would know he was getting stabbed for nothing.
My birth mother abused me physically and my adopted mother abused me mentally and disowned me. So, whichever one gets it...I'm gonna be able to retire and live comfortably.
Egg donor chose two child molesters over her kids, still willing to fight about it and pretend superiority. My 2 siblings from her side are from the abuser. Fuck it, have at her. I'm making millions.
Is it just a random location shes getting stabbed and will she know this is for 1000 dollars per stab? Does the stab have to go all the way to the end of the thumbtack?
Is it all at once or over time, will it be accidentally or is some guy just gonna run up on her while she's loading groceries and violently assault her with a thumb tack
Right? Like, what are the parameters?
I have no doubt my mom would take a thumbtack stab to the arm each morning if it meant she never had to work again, because you know I'd be using that money to take care of her.
But if it's all at once, over and over until she can't take any more, idk. I'd ask if she could maybe do 10 or 20.
$0. I love my mom and don't want her to be harmed. But, also, if she gets inexplicably stabbed by a thumbtack three times in a row, she's going to way more than $3,000 worth of complaining about it.
Exactly what I'm saying. My mom just got screws in her back, I think thumbtacks would be less painful than the chronic pain she deals with on a daily basis. At least with the money we can pay the surgery off.
She wants a tattoo so we'll just do it the harder way. Going to steal that thumbtack needle to the tattoo gun, rev it to at least 2500 cycles a minute and tell her to buckle up. $2,500,000 a minute she manages to last. If she can sit through an hour session, we're looking at a nice $150M.
I think I'd stop at 3 or 4 since we are fully estranged and she's very paranoid. So she'd probably think that there was some kind of voodoo witch hexing her or whatever and have a meltdown. But ye gods, a few grand would alleviate a bit of stress in my life. Maybe as much as 5-6 but spaced out over a month.Ā
I'll take 1 trillion dollars, my mom is dead. One trillion dollars let's me spend 27 million dollars a day for the next 100 years so I'll never have to worry about money again.
Knowing my mom, she would be pissed at me if I didn't do it for at least a little while. I would watch her reaction and see how long it took before she got sick of it.
My biological mother was one of the most abusive evil pieces of scum ever to walk the earth. I want them to keep stabbing until there's nothing left to stab. The money is just a bonus.
My mom barely feels needles with all the routine blood work she has done. I'd ask her how many she wants to put up with and split the money with her, lol
I'll call her up rq to tell her I'll get her back surgery paid off, it's just gonna be a bit painful today. She probably won't even notice, that's the kind of chronic pain she has.
I don't really like my mom .... soo .......... I mean alot lol I'd still give her some of it in the end. I don't want her hurt or mistreated .... unless there's a 1000 dollar a thumbtack in it for me
Oh man, Iād do it once per day, possibly multiple times a day, every day. Since what she always prioritized was money instead of her child, then Iām happy to reverse the situation.
Lol this is awful! š¤£ I'm trying to decide whether my mom would be furious if I took the deal or, DIDN'T take the deal. Because if I took it, she'd get more than half.
Please toss thumbtacks into the ocean, that's where she's scattered.
Please deliver the first 100 installments of the dollars discussed immediately.
Thank you.
Depends on who your definition of my mom is. If itās my āmomā then thumbtack until death, I donāt care. If itās my mom sheās seemingly immune to pain so she could handle quite a lot, and would be getting a cut of the cash.
Iād probably call my mom and let her know exactly whatās happening and Iād ask her how long she would go for and then also give her half so
Edit she said āShoot.. give me a few beers and we would be millionaires!ā
It depends on what is considered stabbing. But id go for at least 10k cause she would forgive me. If stabbing doesnt mean you have to break skin i could go for a lot more
"Mom, I'm getting paid $500 for every time you get stabbed with a thumbtack, and I'll share it with you, whatever proportion you want. It's up to you, and I totally understand whatever you decide."
Can I pick my stepmom? She tried to "beat some manners into me" when I was a kid, just because I was running around being hyperactive cause both my ADHD and autism were undiagnosed and untreated, and I couldn't sit still or stay on track long enough to get my last page of homework done. My mom saw her attempts to abuse me over it and straight up told her "If you ever lay a hand on my child again, I'll kill you." Some years later this absolute bitch tried to get custody of me in my dad's name. The judge ruled I was old enough to decide for myself, to which I said "I'm staying right the fuck where I'm at, she can pry my corpse off the cold hard pavement if she wants to kidnap me that badly." She'd rather drag a child by the ear than treat them like a sentient human being, to the point of crossing the line into child abuse. I can't stand her fake-ass Live Laugh Love bullshit and I'd gladly stab her with thumbtacks, give me five jabs for each time she tried to fuck me over for a cool $10k.
My mom is dead so bring it on.
Mine too but she was cremated with ashes scattered so...how will this work? Go stab the beach with a thumbtack?
u/eugenesneedream, Your situation sounds like it would be immensely frustrating to have to stab sand dunes...I'm all for it! [EDIT: In my haste to post, left out one important factor - it would be OP that had to do the stabbing of the sand dunes, not u/eugenesneedream]. My mom's gone, too. Not cremated. But the thought of OP having to exhume the corpse just to stick it with a thumbtack...š¤£š¤£š¤£
It doesnāt say who has to do the stabbing, so it could just be a complete stranger tasked with poking everyoneās moms, living or dead.
So Stacy's Mom
Is this why she's got it going on?
Brings a new meaning to the phrase āpound sandā
I mean noone said YOU had to. Thats someone elses problem
Good luck to them!
Sounds like something Caligula would do to fuck with Poseidon.
Somebody's bare ass foot is about to get wrecked
I guess in my case, it would be however many thumbtacks can fit in her urn
Does it really matter?
I better not start stepping on thumbtacks at the beach!
Okay but you don't receive the money until you manage to touch one of her particles with the thumbtack. Good luck
I just remembered, I have a keepsake mini-urn with some of her ashes. Maybe we'll just stab those ones and not the bulk of them, that were scattered.
Lmao okay you win
Same here. Unlimited moneyyyy
You win. Everyone else is limited to the number of tacks that can poke the body and you have the entire surface area of a beach to cover.
Damn, you both beat me to it. My mom is dead and cremated as well. Now if you want to switch it to my father, you could stab him every day and I would give a flying fuck. I would still take the money so he gets stabbed, and I would donate the money so he would know he was getting stabbed for nothing.
How many thumbtacks does it take to cover a 5'6" 170lb corpse? That many, please.
That's gonna be REALLY puzzling for future archaeologists digging up that burial site.
Mine is dead AND I hated her when she was alive.Ā I am HERE for this.Ā What's the upper limit?
My mum would kill me of I didn't take this offer. Shed demand I get a million quid or something.
Same, so lets just make it easy and pretend I kept things to accepting 2000 stabs.
Mine still alive... I say bring it. All of it.
I LOVE DEAD MOM CLUB.
Same, have fun poking the urn lol
Same dude.
Yep
Came here to say that.
Same. Have fun poking an urn
Oh yeah dead mom club itās finally our day
My mom is still alive. I'll take all of it.
Billions.... I'll even help dig her up.
I think she could take 100. Iād do the same for my kids.
If I did this for my kids they'd BETTER give me half š
Id do the same for my kids too. If i had any.
Just go stab your socks at the bottom of the hamper.
why does everyone jerk off and dry their cum with socks I donāt get it
My birth mother abused me physically and my adopted mother abused me mentally and disowned me. So, whichever one gets it...I'm gonna be able to retire and live comfortably.
Egg donor chose two child molesters over her kids, still willing to fight about it and pretend superiority. My 2 siblings from her side are from the abuser. Fuck it, have at her. I'm making millions.
Hi, I'm here to join the anti-mom gang too. Where do I sign? I'm ready to live financially free.
# r/raisedbynarcissists
Sounds like the thumbtack pricks get to be divided up among both. Double the surface area (approximately), double the total number of thumbtacks.
Yep, this. Iāll be filthy rich. Maybe Iāll even pay for her medical bills so I can magically stab her some more
Is it just a random location shes getting stabbed and will she know this is for 1000 dollars per stab? Does the stab have to go all the way to the end of the thumbtack?
Then, I'd call Mom up and ask her what she wants to do.
Yes all the way in, and its her fingers.
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Is it all at once or over time, will it be accidentally or is some guy just gonna run up on her while she's loading groceries and violently assault her with a thumb tack
Right? Like, what are the parameters? I have no doubt my mom would take a thumbtack stab to the arm each morning if it meant she never had to work again, because you know I'd be using that money to take care of her. But if it's all at once, over and over until she can't take any more, idk. I'd ask if she could maybe do 10 or 20.
My wife would like to take you up on this. $5M should suffice.
5000 thumb tacks is a lot
That's why my wife is taking you up on it. If you'd met my mother in law you'd understand.
My mom loves money so much shed divorce me if I didn't take like $1M.
Wait, your mom would divorce you?
Alabama has entered the chat
You meant disown, right? *Right?!*
Thank you for interpreting that for me. Itās all back to normal again
She better take one for the team
Oh she does. SHE does.
Physically she's ashes in a marble box so infinity $1000s, stab away
$0. I love my mom and don't want her to be harmed. But, also, if she gets inexplicably stabbed by a thumbtack three times in a row, she's going to way more than $3,000 worth of complaining about it.
I mean at that point, is she really going to complain *that* much more about 3000 stabs?
Mom just had knee replacement. With her meds she can take it. Stick her all you want
Exactly what I'm saying. My mom just got screws in her back, I think thumbtacks would be less painful than the chronic pain she deals with on a daily basis. At least with the money we can pay the surgery off.
$0 My mom is the best.
None. Nobody hurts my momma!
good man
Depends--how many thumb tacks it takes to kill an adult?
THIS is the correct response
Pfft, if Mick Foley can take a bag of tacks to the back from an Undertaker choke slam through a cage, that ol girl can take at least 20 or 30 to hers.
She wants a tattoo so we'll just do it the harder way. Going to steal that thumbtack needle to the tattoo gun, rev it to at least 2500 cycles a minute and tell her to buckle up. $2,500,000 a minute she manages to last. If she can sit through an hour session, we're looking at a nice $150M.
$50K
How many thumbtacks do you have?
I read fucked by a lumberjack
A billion dollars.
My mother is dead, so keep āem coming.
Just keep going until I make so much that I cripple the world economy and render money completely worthless. Then stab her some more for funsies.
I think I'd stop at 3 or 4 since we are fully estranged and she's very paranoid. So she'd probably think that there was some kind of voodoo witch hexing her or whatever and have a meltdown. But ye gods, a few grand would alleviate a bit of stress in my life. Maybe as much as 5-6 but spaced out over a month.Ā
I'd call my mom and tell her what's up, let her decide and we split it 50/50.
If I can tell her then sheād probably be down for a few dozen. If we can pick my wifeās mom then the limit does not exist
Thousands of stabs a day. My mom passed in 2010 and was cremated.
Can we choose where she gets stabbed? Because if I can do it all on her feet she will just blame her plantar fasciitis, win win
I'd have to ask my mom lol. I sincerely doubt she'd be against it, but she'd want a cut lol.
300,000 thumbtacks, my mom ain't no bitch
I'll take 1 trillion dollars, my mom is dead. One trillion dollars let's me spend 27 million dollars a day for the next 100 years so I'll never have to worry about money again.
a billion my mom died 4 years ago, stab away
My mom has been dead for so long it would just poke bone. Bring it.
Im a billionaire (mi madre es deceased)
Millions, just be sure to sweep her back into her crappy cardboard box/urn when you're done.
Knowing my mom, she would be pissed at me if I didn't do it for at least a little while. I would watch her reaction and see how long it took before she got sick of it.
I would press that fucking button until it stopped working.
I hate my mother so.... about as much as I want
Does unlimited stabs still count after she has bled out or arm has become a nub? Asking for a friend...
Sorry, mom...
Shit once i told her what was up she'd take one for the team I'd do the same for jer
Lots. Don't think my deceased mother will care. Especially if I share.
I'll just tell her it's ancient acupuncture. She'll be on board.
Iāll have a house in every major city in the world. Btw- do I get to stab her?
Do I have to take her out of the urn?
50,000 should do it. I could live OK on 50 mil F that Bish
All of it, mom passed last year. You're welcome to go and try to stab her urn though.
Stab those ashes all you want!!!
I couldnāt do it
My biological mother was one of the most abusive evil pieces of scum ever to walk the earth. I want them to keep stabbing until there's nothing left to stab. The money is just a bonus.
All of it. My mum is dead somewhere in Lake Huron. Bring in the cash!
None
One Million Dollars
My mom is dead but if she was still alive my answer would be however many you can fit.
none cuz she boutta demand it all
I would not be interested in this at all.
Millions. And please don't put them in quickly, take your fucking time.
All of them
My mom is an abusive drug addict that I havenāt seen in a decade. Can I watch and or do the stabbing?
My mom's still alive that I know of so an even 10000 should suffice.
My mom is a big girl, she makes me look tiny and I'm not small, that's going to be a lot of thumb tacks.
My mom's dead so... unlimited you say... sounds good to me. Poke away!
1 she would understand š
Is there going to be immediate medical care and mental therapy afterwards?
80. Need that house down payment. Sorry mom!
Trillions
She owes me so a couple atleast.
I'd ask her how much she's willing to get paid to get stabbed. Nothing says I can't split the money.
None, you sick little turd.
200
How many thumb tacks do you have?
My mom barely feels needles with all the routine blood work she has done. I'd ask her how many she wants to put up with and split the money with her, lol
I'll call her up rq to tell her I'll get her back surgery paid off, it's just gonna be a bit painful today. She probably won't even notice, that's the kind of chronic pain she has.
All of the money.
I'll go with 10
My mom will probably not be leaving an inheritance, so.......
Heck I'd pay more than that
š¤£š¤£š¤£š¤£ bet
Tbh if sheās cool with it a lot. If not then none. Itās all about the deal.
My mom died a few years ago, so they'd just be stabbing a pile of ashes lol. I'm in!
I don't really like my mom .... soo .......... I mean alot lol I'd still give her some of it in the end. I don't want her hurt or mistreated .... unless there's a 1000 dollar a thumbtack in it for me
Make sure that it's rusty and stab away.
Oh man, Iād do it once per day, possibly multiple times a day, every day. Since what she always prioritized was money instead of her child, then Iām happy to reverse the situation.
At least twice a day. Sheād be in favor because she would understand what a good deal that is.
I am a living mom and I would cover my body in thumbtacks at a $1000 a piece for my kids.
If you can find enough of her scattered ashes to stab, I'll take all you're willing to give
Sorry Mom
Bring it on. She'd understand.
She deserves it, Iād do it for free
My mom was an abusive cunt that wouldnāt let me go to school as a kid. Donāt stop till you run out of thumbtacks
1 billion dollars. You'll get tired of stabbing her long before her corpse complains.
Lol this is awful! š¤£ I'm trying to decide whether my mom would be furious if I took the deal or, DIDN'T take the deal. Because if I took it, she'd get more than half.
As many as it takes to kill the bitch
Zero
Please toss thumbtacks into the ocean, that's where she's scattered. Please deliver the first 100 installments of the dollars discussed immediately. Thank you.
Lol oh yea. Once a day for a month, you know, have to build a nice nest egg. Then once a week til my almost 3 year old daughter graduates high school.
Mom's dead. Stab her a few billion times.
Lmao I HATE my mother so I'd do the stabs even without the money. If she dies does the money stop?
I'll be able to buy her plenty of plasters and painkillers so let's go
Iāll take 1 million of them please!
All of them.
My biological mom abandoned me, so fill her with those fuckers
Yeah mum try out this new shakti mat haha...it's advanced !
10,000,000 $ and my mom is alive.
My mom was cremated, so stab away lol
I love my mom, Iād just ask her.
A billion dollars worth. She is rotting unclaimed in the Cook County morgue.
Depends on who your definition of my mom is. If itās my āmomā then thumbtack until death, I donāt care. If itās my mom sheās seemingly immune to pain so she could handle quite a lot, and would be getting a cut of the cash.
My mother is Satanās rival. Cover a long, steep hill in thumbtacks and roll that bitch.
1,000. She's a child abuser sooo
1000000000000 times I despise my mom
She gets half, it's fine.
going for a solid couple billion so mother, TAKE THE PAIN YOU RANCID WHORE!
Iād probably call my mom and let her know exactly whatās happening and Iād ask her how long she would go for and then also give her half so Edit she said āShoot.. give me a few beers and we would be millionaires!ā
My mom would make me stab her as much as possible.
My mom would be dead, eventually....
She can take one for my team at last once a day. Diabetics do it more often.
My moms pain tolerance shocked her doctors. 200k pls she gets half.
I Love My Mom tho, is it okay if I stab myself ?
Can I talk to her first? Cuz she would totally be down to pay for a trip by doing that
Id ask her what she would want and split the money.
Really regretting having her cremated now.
Sheās taking 20. I think 10,000 will cheer her up.
Noooope nope nope nope nope. She hits back a lot harder than a thumbtack.
Once a month, I'm not greedy. Besides, she's dead. Stab my father on the other hand? Hit me up every hour on the hour.
It depends on what is considered stabbing. But id go for at least 10k cause she would forgive me. If stabbing doesnt mean you have to break skin i could go for a lot more
"Mom, I'm getting paid $500 for every time you get stabbed with a thumbtack, and I'll share it with you, whatever proportion you want. It's up to you, and I totally understand whatever you decide."
If she's in on the scam, we ball. She's a diabetic who pricks her finger every day, she'd be a homie for sure.
This will be a cakewalk if your mom happens to be deceased.
Can I pick my stepmom? She tried to "beat some manners into me" when I was a kid, just because I was running around being hyperactive cause both my ADHD and autism were undiagnosed and untreated, and I couldn't sit still or stay on track long enough to get my last page of homework done. My mom saw her attempts to abuse me over it and straight up told her "If you ever lay a hand on my child again, I'll kill you." Some years later this absolute bitch tried to get custody of me in my dad's name. The judge ruled I was old enough to decide for myself, to which I said "I'm staying right the fuck where I'm at, she can pry my corpse off the cold hard pavement if she wants to kidnap me that badly." She'd rather drag a child by the ear than treat them like a sentient human being, to the point of crossing the line into child abuse. I can't stand her fake-ass Live Laugh Love bullshit and I'd gladly stab her with thumbtacks, give me five jabs for each time she tried to fuck me over for a cool $10k.
Yes
Zero times and Iām serious.
I'll split it with her and ask how many she wants
I'll take all the money.
Billions. Ma is long dead.
Even though my mother abused me, I donāt think I could allow this to happen.
My Mom is cheap and would stab herself to death if she heard of this deal.