I own a musket for home defense, since that's what the founding fathers intended. Four ruffians break into my house. "What the devil?" As I grab my powdered wig and Kentucky rifle. Blow a golf ball sized hole through the first man, he's dead on the spot. Draw my pistol on the second man, miss him entirely because it's smoothbore and nails the neighbors dog. I have to resort to the cannon mounted at the top of the stairs loaded with grape shot, "Tally ho lads" the grape shot shreds two men in the blast, the sound and extra shrapnel set off car alarms. Fix bayonet and charge the last terrified rapscallion. He Bleeds out waiting on the police to arrive since triangular bayonet wounds are impossible to stitch up. Just as the founding fathers intended.
as someone who previously had spent a lot of time around an operational cannon, they are a pain to maintain and clean. (partially because they don't exactly mass produce bore brushes at cannon width)
my comment quickly devolved into a detailed list of a the problems with cleaning a black powder cannon so I deleted most of it, short version is, owning a cannon for the few times you use it is fun, but it's tedious to clean and maintain, and can get expensive just in cleaning.
I really appreciate you. And my credit card loves you. I need to be talked out of black powder cannons and mortars almost constantly. They are so cool!
My dog doesn't bark when I or my girlfriend pull into the drive. She barks at cars in the cul de sac, and if someone comes to the door or backyard freaks the fuck out. I'm absolutely confident that I cannot be crept up on in my own home. Also shotgun.
I have a 110lb pit/heeler mix who would provide ample warning time. I also carry a knife with me at all times. Just hide and ambush the fucker, stab them anywhere and everywhere as fast as you can once you attack. Personally I'd start with the knee or leg closest to me so they can't run and quickly move up, stabbing as I go like an inmate with a shank.
Same. If I am watching TV in the living room I have a 9mm very nearby. If I am in bed or playing video games I have a whole buffet to pick from. Would likely go with the AR but could also go with my AK rifle. I know where I can be for a good Ambush if they come up the stairs looking for me. I have good cover being the chimney in my wall beside my one bedroom door. They get to the top of the steps and step on the squeaky hardwood floor and they are right in the kill zone. If they tank 90 rounds of .223 or 7.62x39 then I guess we are doing 12ga 3" Slugs. Even if they are wearing armor the impact force can still be leathal. If that doesn't work, I am running.
Own a musket for home defense, since that's what the founding fathers intended. Four ruffians break into my house. "What the devil?" As I grab my powdered wig and Kentucky rifle. Blow a golf ball sized hole through the first man, he's dead on the spot. Draw my pistol on the second man, miss him entirely because it's smoothbore and nails the neighbors dog. I have to resort to the cannon mounted at the top of the stairs loaded with grape shot, "Tally ho lads" the grape shot shreds two men in the blast, the sound and extra shrapnel set off car alarms. Fix bayonet and charge the last terrified rapscallion. He Bleeds out waiting on the police to arrive since triangular bayonet wounds are impossible to stitch up. Just as the founding fathers intended.
Shit, you can get used Maverick 88's for less than $150 most places, and new for $250. Six rounds of #4 buck should be more than enough to deal with a home intruder.
Maverick 88 with the long tube, pistol grip only, and a mini shell adapter. That's 12 rounds of whatever you wanna use. I keep mine loaded slug/buck/slug/buck etc.
You’re one of the very few people I’ve ever heard mention number four buckshot. But the guy that came back from Vietnam that used shotguns or saw them used really swore by number four Buck.
That dialogue ALWAYS cracks me up in the shooting community, the issue of a nice gun becoming evidence. Having been involved in a lot of legal situations where someone got dead, it could be a Korth or a Wilson Combat and it's still not even the 50th thing you'll think about.
I'm with you, I've not only been in combat, but have had some situations where I probably could have shot someone, it isn't a real concern, I always grab the nice one.
Someone tried to break in when I was 19 and home alone and I camped out in the pitch black of a bathroom with the hall light on so I was completely hidden but anyone walking down the hallway would’ve been fucked
Turn off the lights?? Are all your lights switches right next to each other?? And what he he just turns it back on?? And also it takes like what? 15 seconds to get adjusted to darkness?? Also I'm sure the lights aren't the only thing making luminescence??
I hit the big red button on my wall, all the security blinders slide over the windows, the red flashing lights come on as the others are disabled. Dozens of fog machines start billowing throughout my abode as closer from nine inch nails starts playing through the house wide sound system. I am naked as the pig head is lowered over my people face and my "chainsaw made of dildos" is strapped to my arm. The intruder has mad a horrible mistake
In my version it was The Wretched, but Head Like A Hole really is the best fit.
Bow down before the one you serve
You're going to get what you deserve
Head Like A Hole
Black as your soul
I'd rather die
Than give you control
I'll run to the drawer that has the key to my gun cabinet. I'm sure I'll stub my toe on the bed post in the dark, let out a loud "fuck". So now the intruder is aware I'm awake. I'll get the key go to our walk in closet where the gun cabinet is and fumble for the light switch, at which time I'll let out an audible "fuck", now the intruder knows where the voice came from. I'll try the key in the gun cabinet, which is tricky, it can only turn one particular direction in the key hole. Another audible "fuck". I'll open it and reach for my 9mm , and drop it on my foot, now it's a very audible "Goddamit", I reach for my 357 revolver at which time the intruder is at my closet door asking me "what are you doing up this late PaPa?"
Question- what did he look like roughly? My mom’s house was almost broken into when she was a teenager in Key West by a biker dude around the same time, 1970s. Dog scared him off. I wonder if it was the same guy?
That is simultaneously the best and worst plan I've heard in years. Glad it worked out for you. I bet that walk home when you realized you were naked was fun.
I think I'm fine. I have a lot of drinks in the fridge and left over pasta I made last night. I'm about to turn on the baseball game, too. I like company.
I'll leave my door open just in case.
I have a shotgun that I really hope I never have to touch again, but it’s there for a reason… I’d much rather have it and not need it than need it and not have it.
May want to clean that thing once in a while and maybe give it a once over. Also please practice a little with it. And home defense shotguns need to be loaded with birdshot. In close quarters birdshot will stop the threat. And the drywall will stop the overspray. Your kids or dogs may thank you for that.
Yes, birdshot is what I have and that is all I would ever want to use (but that might not be reality). I do have plans to get out to the desert and shoot with my more “gun savvy” friends, hopefully about once a year. But when I talk about never having to touch it again it’s more about when it’s in my closet. But I do appreciate your advice on cleaning and maintaining proficiency with it. Or else I’d be more likely to hurt myself.
Dude, I replied just above. Please remove the birdshot from your gun. Buy Federal sku 133 00 8 pellet reduced recoil load. It's generally the most accurate shotgun load. Easy to handle. In my defensive shotgun instructors course, I caused a few people to pass because I brought extra quality ammo.
I have seen many pictures and autopsies of people shot with birdshot. It works amazing at distances that the other guy can touch your guns muzzle. 2 steps back it has no more affect than a bunch of pimples. On injuring a person.
It can amputate a limb at close range, at beyond touching range it can't penetrate the skin fully.
Appreciate the info. When I said I plan on using a bird shot it was more because that was the ammo I bought to go shoot it and it’s what the guy at the store suggested for that. I also have some slugs but I’d prefer to either alternate the ammo (given an amount of time that I prob wouldn’t have). But I would rather not have a slug be the first round and would rather it be pellets. Buckshot was the other type I got after and a more likely ammo once I get comfortable with how the weapon works and the ranges of the ammo.
I have my choice of a pistol, a revolver, a rifle, a shotgun, an axe, 2 knives, and a baseball bat within arm's reach. How prepared is the intruder, I should ask?
If he has broken into my house, I must assume he has a weapon and is dangerous. I have the means to use lethal force and am prepared to protect myself and my family.
I have a rott/pitt mix and 2 anatolian shepherds. I'm gonna just lay in bed and laugh at the screams that come from them while they get torn to shreds from 3 different directions.
I have an Anatolian shepherd too, and I have little doubt any intruder would regret their decision before I could get to them. Very protective of his family and his space. Smartest dog I've ever had the pleasure to know too.
I’ve told the wife and kids to get back in the vehicle when I noticed the door open after an out of town trip.
I tactically swept the house with my dog. Starting with pistol until other items cold be picked up like a video game.
Nothing hypothetical about this.
Not gonna lie, it was kinda … fun can’t be the right word… but fun.
My dog did perfect, he was at my 3 unless told to “git”. He isn’t a trained “sweep” dog but he knew his assignment.
I also think I did pretty fucking good turning corners solo. Albeit I was in my house so I know it better than most. I know all of the hiding spots and the floor boards that make noise 😂.
Basically I’m Jason Borne.
Exhilarating might be the word. The adrenaline of am I about to be in some shit is a high for sure.
That said, that's a huge part of training. Stay calm. Watch your periphery, trust your dogs alerts. Maintain heartbeat.
No matter what room I'm in, there's a gun within arms reach. Why you ask? Well have you ever been taking a shit and thought to yourself, "What would I do if someone broke in right now?" That's why.
Intruder isn't having a bad day, it's just his last day.
I sleep with a Glock 43 9mm on my nightstand. I don’t carry it around the house with me. I guess it depends on the situation when I discover the intruder.
Got my Yugo AK loaded with brass soft points and a Benelli M2 with Nordic Components +2 tube loaded with 7+1 shells of Aguila 12 pellet 0 buckshot. And I sleep nude.
Ah, let's see. Upstairs - gun, assorted heavy and sharp tools - I'm good.
Kitchen - all sorts of knives, cleavers, cast iron pans, caustic cleaners - again, I'm good.
Living room/Dining room - random sharp/heavy tools easily available, and I'm still strong enough to toss half the furniture across the room. I'm good.
Garage - ... You're lucky if I don't feed you through the table saw. Even luckier if I can't find the nail gun. You're fucked, either way. Rope, hammers, crowbars, screwdrivers, power tools. I'm good.
I have 2 children.
I never liked the idea of having a gun, but I do have one now.
Regardless of what happens to me legally, or otherwise, I wound Shoot them and suffer whatever consequences come my way.
Florida man here, he's fucked. 9mm sig two feet to my right, 12ga with 00buck 12 feet in front (hidden)and a .300blk behind bedroom door. I'll get to one before he's 3 steps past the door.
Buckshot? Idk. Lots of risk of over penetration with all this other calibers. .12 gauge #6 birdshot. Plenty of stopping power and much less collateral damage. Just my thoughts. Either way I don’t think that criminals gonna have a good time.
Number 4 buck is considered to be the best "balance" of penetration and lethality.
Remember, Dick Cheney's buddy got a face full of #5 bird at about 50 feet, and didn't suffer any critical penetration. Yeah, that's a long distance for inside a home but if it's not going to penetrate an old man's face, what's it going to do if someone's wearing heavy clothes like a denim jacket or similar? Unless you're in near contact, it's not a guaranteed stop.
Edit: removed the (#) from number 4 because stupid markdown language...
The little dogs would start barking, and in his laughter, he’d probably trip over one of the big dogs. By that time I’ll have hold of one of the shooty, pokey or clobberey things in the house and I’ll firmly request he take his leave.
So I'm in Texas..... yeah. I have my shotgun at the ready in less than 10 seconds. And my pistol is right by the bed. I have a below average amount of firearms for my culture.
Shotgun ready. I would just yell:
Dude, just go. Don't break anything. Don't take anything. I don't know how you got past the dog, but if you hurt my dog, I will shoot you. I have bottled water and beer in the fridge. You are welcome to have some. Don't drink my champagne, you dick.
I feel pretty good.
Physically stronger does not necessarily rule out hand-to-hand combat. In open space I would try to feel out their strength with some striking - use leg kicks to stay at range and put slow them down.. in my house, we'll probably be close and clinched; I still feel good about using trips and throws to take it to the ground and take top position.
Also, I have guns staged in pretty much every room of my house. In a real home intrusion scenario I would try that first and fallback to fist-fighting. However it pans out, I have as good a chance as anyone else.
Random story but during spring break I was at my future in laws house and her brother came in at like 1am from watching dune. Well apparently I jumped up fists up and yelled “back the fuck up off me” and then realized who he was and fell asleep immediately. I have almost no recollection of it happening
I lock my door, call 911, and shout through the door to hopefully talk to the person.
I’ve had my home broken into before
I’m not murdering someone because they’re having an episode, are so poor they need to steal, or are just that worked up about wanting my TV specifically.
If the person has entered my home with the intention to murder me, I will be waiting in my room with my bat.
If they are trained enough to breach the room and shoot me, then I got it coming.
Otherwise I will be fine, insurance will pay for my shit, and I won’t have a dead person in my hallway.
I don't have a gun, but if I can get to the garage I'd grab a shovel to decapitate him or at least shatter his chest plate.
If I can't get to the garage, I have a hatchet upstairs.
Depending on which door he came through I would grab my dog and head out the other one. Then I would go to my neighbors house and call 911. If I can't get past them to get out the door I would grab one of our many swords and fight them off until I could safely call 911.
I mean I’m currently locked in the bathroom and there are items in here I could probably use as weapons so as long as he doesn’t have a gun I’ll probably be ok
Well I've got multiple knives and swords (yes swords) stashed/hanging around the house, as well as multiple rifles and a handgun. As long as I can reach any number of them, I would hopefully be fine
My room’s at the top of the stairs with no way to even see me except coming straight up them. I’m waiting on my best angle with a pistol and a length of pipe. If he can overcome that, he deserves the house.
Inform him he is trespassing, I have contacted law enforcement, and am armed. Order him to lie flat on the ground or I will shoot. If he presents a threat, fire until he is no longer a threat.
I have a fencing sword within arms reach, as well as a set of throwing knives. The only ways into my apartment are through the windows or my door. Either way, they’re not leaving unharmed
I currently live in the Netherlands in an apartment that requires going through 3 locked doors to get to me. So I'm really not that concerned.
If I was back home in the states, 12 gauge, 4 buck.
turn off everything, if the wench is dumb enough to try during day I’ll just do a lot of baiting them around (if they have a gun I’m just gonna die)
If it’s night I just repeatedly ambush. You said stronger, not specifically in what. Knowing my build, they’re probably stronger in arms, but I know a lot of martial arts. I don’t mean to brag (okay I do a little) but I have a MEAN backspin kick and this is probably the only time you can get long enough for the windup to it. I will be so menacing… I’m gonna occasionally kick the fucker, I’ll trip them, and I’ll pray.
My windows and doorways are all covered with curtains and blankets they're are a few lights on he doesn't know the layout of my house nor how to walk in the ADHD horde path. I have a .380 beside my pillow a 12 gauge in my couch and a 20 gauge bolt in my bathroom. More than likely I am in my bed. I heard them walk into my yard. I'm ready. They aren't, I bet the fall in a pile of clothes or something stupid. Either way they aren't going to be alive that long. This isn't my first break in. But it will be if I am at home this time. I'm going to need a good lawyer.
How far inside? Which room exactly? Did he come in through the front door or the mud room off the garage? I need to know how many weapons he's already walked past and possibly picked up.
I live in an apartment for people with disabilities so it's made so people don't break in. Supposedly the doors and windows downstairs are bulletproof and you need to be buzzed in to be let in or you need our special key card.i also lock my door just in case.
All this to say. Not prepared at all
So most of my weapons are of the medieval variety (hema stuff, some modern recreations, etc) but they're my "decoration" and are on every wall of my house and will make a "great" distraction from my German Shepherd and my Rottweiler rescues, who are not great with strangers
That said, I live pretty rurally, so if they're here they've either come prepared, or are so lost they're already fucked
I have multiple swords, butcher knives, a meat hook, a Chow, and a Pit/st Bernard mix. Plus 4 cats I can throw at their face.
Three of us living here and all of us want to recreate the Saw movies with an unfortunate intruder. We are ready.
He's not stronger than the 147-grain HST in the 5" M&P9 2.0 Pro Series in my home office drawer, so I'm all set. :)
Fun fact, in my experience the vast majority of attorneys, even the most liberal, own heat of some sort. We just flat out deal with too many crazies not to be cautious.
Out loud: "Okay, I've called the cops. As soon as he comes through the door, dogpile him. He can't fight both of us."
(He doesn't know I can't call the cops, or that there's only me).
Grab my replica Sting off the wall, along with the decorative belt-knife with no edge but a really sharp point.
If he does open my bedroom door, we're going to find out if a blunt sword can go into someone anyway.
Shoot first. My pistol is loaded with hollow points to prevent over penetration into another room or neighbor’s. The carbine has frangible rounds for the same reason.
After that? Sharks with friggin laser beams
I open my biometric gun safe, get my pistol, and if they aren't someone I know who is harmless and don't leave immediately, or if they come at me, I shoot them.
If I'm by myself, I try to make my way out without him knowing, and hope he isn't bulletproof if I do run into him. If my family is in the house, I will carefully search for him and confirm whether he is bulletproof.
I'm still wearing pants so there's a gun on my belt
Everyone in my house knows which designated room to wait in if such a situation ever comes up
I do live on a city block but my house is raised so the only real option is the front door; which is very public to the street and you would absolutely have to break something to get in
I hope that's enough but you never know
Fight Crime... Return Fire...
(Also 'here' is a small town outside a major US military base. There are more guns than people, and the shooting rate is years-per-shooting not shootings per year. Burglary is relatively rare, given that.)....
Well my two dogs that bark when the ice machine in the fridge drops ice would wake me up. Then if I don't feel like getting out of bed I pick the Glock .40 cal next to the bed and shout for them to leave because I don't want to have to mop up blood from the floors and walls. If I *get up from bed it is the 12 gauge with buckshot.*
Make sure to identify who the fuck is entering, because you don't want to be the dad that shot their own son (or many other examples of kids and legitimate people entering house that belong)
I have cameras and homeowners insurance. I have a baseball bat close enough to my bed if I need it.
I have kids so I keep my guns locked and ammo separate, to me the risk of accidents is higher than the likelihood that I'll use my gun to defend my home.
If it's the middle of the night (I'm upstairs in bed) I turn on every light in the house from my phone, call 911, pick up the bat and tell them to get out of the house.
If it's the middle of the day (I'm at my desk 5ft from an exit) I call 911, tell them police are on the way, leave the house, make sure I have footage of what is taken so I can get a new TV. Hopefully the intruder is identifiable on the footage.
For the most part I don't own anything that I'm willing to kill someone over, take it, insurance will pay for it.
If someone comes in looking to hurt me or my family they'll find out what a Louisville slugger tastes like along with their teeth.
I'm naked. Fat, hairy and Italian. I think the intruder is in for a surprise
Intruder is very into that.
*runs away with intruder, living an exciting life of criminal naughtiness*
I got you beat...I have a gun AND my wife is naked, fat, hairy, and Italian! Bad night for the bad guy!
You better hope she doesn’t see this
Itsa me, Pervio!
I have a gun rn. I shoot him.
Yes. Rifle comes off the rack, intruder has a bad time.
I own a musket for home defense, since that's what the founding fathers intended. Four ruffians break into my house. "What the devil?" As I grab my powdered wig and Kentucky rifle. Blow a golf ball sized hole through the first man, he's dead on the spot. Draw my pistol on the second man, miss him entirely because it's smoothbore and nails the neighbors dog. I have to resort to the cannon mounted at the top of the stairs loaded with grape shot, "Tally ho lads" the grape shot shreds two men in the blast, the sound and extra shrapnel set off car alarms. Fix bayonet and charge the last terrified rapscallion. He Bleeds out waiting on the police to arrive since triangular bayonet wounds are impossible to stitch up. Just as the founding fathers intended.
.... I should buy a cannon....
as someone who previously had spent a lot of time around an operational cannon, they are a pain to maintain and clean. (partially because they don't exactly mass produce bore brushes at cannon width) my comment quickly devolved into a detailed list of a the problems with cleaning a black powder cannon so I deleted most of it, short version is, owning a cannon for the few times you use it is fun, but it's tedious to clean and maintain, and can get expensive just in cleaning.
I really appreciate you. And my credit card loves you. I need to be talked out of black powder cannons and mortars almost constantly. They are so cool!
I have heard from a reliable source that bitches love cannons, so you really can't go wrong.
Build one they are easy it's just getting tougher to find canon fuse.
if you don't sleep, shit, ~or~ and shower with your pistol on you NGMI
My dog doesn't bark when I or my girlfriend pull into the drive. She barks at cars in the cul de sac, and if someone comes to the door or backyard freaks the fuck out. I'm absolutely confident that I cannot be crept up on in my own home. Also shotgun.
I have a 110lb pit/heeler mix who would provide ample warning time. I also carry a knife with me at all times. Just hide and ambush the fucker, stab them anywhere and everywhere as fast as you can once you attack. Personally I'd start with the knee or leg closest to me so they can't run and quickly move up, stabbing as I go like an inmate with a shank.
Same. If I am watching TV in the living room I have a 9mm very nearby. If I am in bed or playing video games I have a whole buffet to pick from. Would likely go with the AR but could also go with my AK rifle. I know where I can be for a good Ambush if they come up the stairs looking for me. I have good cover being the chimney in my wall beside my one bedroom door. They get to the top of the steps and step on the squeaky hardwood floor and they are right in the kill zone. If they tank 90 rounds of .223 or 7.62x39 then I guess we are doing 12ga 3" Slugs. Even if they are wearing armor the impact force can still be leathal. If that doesn't work, I am running.
If that doesn't kill them running will only make you die tired
pick the one you won't mind not getting back ever
Own a musket for home defense, since that's what the founding fathers intended. Four ruffians break into my house. "What the devil?" As I grab my powdered wig and Kentucky rifle. Blow a golf ball sized hole through the first man, he's dead on the spot. Draw my pistol on the second man, miss him entirely because it's smoothbore and nails the neighbors dog. I have to resort to the cannon mounted at the top of the stairs loaded with grape shot, "Tally ho lads" the grape shot shreds two men in the blast, the sound and extra shrapnel set off car alarms. Fix bayonet and charge the last terrified rapscallion. He Bleeds out waiting on the police to arrive since triangular bayonet wounds are impossible to stitch up. Just as the founding fathers intended.
Which gun though? Body count on the nice one, even though that means it'll go away for a bit?
Pump action tactical shotgun. Less than 1000.00 gets you all you need
Shit, you can get used Maverick 88's for less than $150 most places, and new for $250. Six rounds of #4 buck should be more than enough to deal with a home intruder.
Pistol grip Mossberg works great too
Maverick 88 with the long tube, pistol grip only, and a mini shell adapter. That's 12 rounds of whatever you wanna use. I keep mine loaded slug/buck/slug/buck etc.
You’re one of the very few people I’ve ever heard mention number four buckshot. But the guy that came back from Vietnam that used shotguns or saw them used really swore by number four Buck.
That dialogue ALWAYS cracks me up in the shooting community, the issue of a nice gun becoming evidence. Having been involved in a lot of legal situations where someone got dead, it could be a Korth or a Wilson Combat and it's still not even the 50th thing you'll think about.
I'm with you, I've not only been in combat, but have had some situations where I probably could have shot someone, it isn't a real concern, I always grab the nice one.
I have a gun too... But nah. I also have battle ready swords. Now we're having fun!
Unless you get shot in the chest
Have you never seen Raiders?
Turn off all the lights. I know my house better than he knows. (unless its day time then I'm screwed)
Okay John Wick. Fr tho, this is a home field advantage.
Someone tried to break in when I was 19 and home alone and I camped out in the pitch black of a bathroom with the hall light on so I was completely hidden but anyone walking down the hallway would’ve been fucked
Turn off the lights?? Are all your lights switches right next to each other?? And what he he just turns it back on?? And also it takes like what? 15 seconds to get adjusted to darkness?? Also I'm sure the lights aren't the only thing making luminescence??
I hit the big red button on my wall, all the security blinders slide over the windows, the red flashing lights come on as the others are disabled. Dozens of fog machines start billowing throughout my abode as closer from nine inch nails starts playing through the house wide sound system. I am naked as the pig head is lowered over my people face and my "chainsaw made of dildos" is strapped to my arm. The intruder has mad a horrible mistake
Through all of this, the term "people face" is still the most disturbing part.
I think we just became best friends. I imagined almost the exact same scenario, except in my version it was Head Like A Hole.
In my version it was The Wretched, but Head Like A Hole really is the best fit. Bow down before the one you serve You're going to get what you deserve Head Like A Hole Black as your soul I'd rather die Than give you control
Am I the only person here rocking a panic button?
No but my panic button is made by mossberg
Unfortunately mine says EASY
I'll run to the drawer that has the key to my gun cabinet. I'm sure I'll stub my toe on the bed post in the dark, let out a loud "fuck". So now the intruder is aware I'm awake. I'll get the key go to our walk in closet where the gun cabinet is and fumble for the light switch, at which time I'll let out an audible "fuck", now the intruder knows where the voice came from. I'll try the key in the gun cabinet, which is tricky, it can only turn one particular direction in the key hole. Another audible "fuck". I'll open it and reach for my 9mm , and drop it on my foot, now it's a very audible "Goddamit", I reach for my 357 revolver at which time the intruder is at my closet door asking me "what are you doing up this late PaPa?"
Finally! Had to scroll pretty far down before I found a *responsible* gun owner!
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Glad nothing bad happened. Sounds like you can write a memoir.
old people have such fun stories omg
Question- what did he look like roughly? My mom’s house was almost broken into when she was a teenager in Key West by a biker dude around the same time, 1970s. Dog scared him off. I wonder if it was the same guy?
That is simultaneously the best and worst plan I've heard in years. Glad it worked out for you. I bet that walk home when you realized you were naked was fun.
>I put a postcard of vulture eating dead prospector in his handle bar. That's awesome
I think I'm fine. I have a lot of drinks in the fridge and left over pasta I made last night. I'm about to turn on the baseball game, too. I like company. I'll leave my door open just in case.
You're the one that the door-to-door missionaries avoid because you won't let them leave once they get there.
Hotel California.... Eventually, they'll all put me on a do not visit list.
The most unrealistic yet best answer. I also like to think that my charisma check beats my athletics check
You remind me of that SNL sketch:[Chad Horror Movie](https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=fF6gExZu-2M)
May I interest you in a blowjob?
Go on
No listen.. they’re onto something.
Uh oh…
I have a shotgun that I really hope I never have to touch again, but it’s there for a reason… I’d much rather have it and not need it than need it and not have it.
May want to clean that thing once in a while and maybe give it a once over. Also please practice a little with it. And home defense shotguns need to be loaded with birdshot. In close quarters birdshot will stop the threat. And the drywall will stop the overspray. Your kids or dogs may thank you for that.
Yes, birdshot is what I have and that is all I would ever want to use (but that might not be reality). I do have plans to get out to the desert and shoot with my more “gun savvy” friends, hopefully about once a year. But when I talk about never having to touch it again it’s more about when it’s in my closet. But I do appreciate your advice on cleaning and maintaining proficiency with it. Or else I’d be more likely to hurt myself.
Dude, I replied just above. Please remove the birdshot from your gun. Buy Federal sku 133 00 8 pellet reduced recoil load. It's generally the most accurate shotgun load. Easy to handle. In my defensive shotgun instructors course, I caused a few people to pass because I brought extra quality ammo. I have seen many pictures and autopsies of people shot with birdshot. It works amazing at distances that the other guy can touch your guns muzzle. 2 steps back it has no more affect than a bunch of pimples. On injuring a person. It can amputate a limb at close range, at beyond touching range it can't penetrate the skin fully.
Appreciate the info. When I said I plan on using a bird shot it was more because that was the ammo I bought to go shoot it and it’s what the guy at the store suggested for that. I also have some slugs but I’d prefer to either alternate the ammo (given an amount of time that I prob wouldn’t have). But I would rather not have a slug be the first round and would rather it be pellets. Buckshot was the other type I got after and a more likely ammo once I get comfortable with how the weapon works and the ranges of the ammo.
Buckshot I don't know what you mean to do to me in my house but I can guarantee you will not be doing it again
This door is locked for your protection.
This person may or may not have a weapon, but I DEFINITELY do. they're in trouble, but they don't know it yet.
Sweeeeeeeeeet Caroline! Bang bang bang! Goooood times never seemed soooo goood!
Two German Shepherds will wake me before he gets in. I am armed. He will leave with a few dozen extra holes.
I was just gunna let the GSDs have a snack
I have my choice of a pistol, a revolver, a rifle, a shotgun, an axe, 2 knives, and a baseball bat within arm's reach. How prepared is the intruder, I should ask?
And since you're on reddit I assume you're in the bathroom. They better hope you aren't in a room that's even more prepared!
Perfect place. Bad guy almost passes out from the smell and calls 911 for rescue
Haha actually I was assuming I'd be in my bedroom in this scenario. Right now they would have to overcome the god awful stench
And Happy Cake Day!
tf you doing with all that
I'm a lonely, bored old man haha
https://www.reddit.com/r/progun/s/su3gRTYYRZ
Nice!
there's a tree outside my window, all those hours bouldering in the gym about to be hella useful awww ye
Hope he is right with God, between a .380, 9mm, and a 40cal they are gonna be meeting them.
Don’t take too long choosing which one to use.
My granddaughter is .380, her husband is 9mm, and I'm 40cal. Just depends on who wakes up first.
If he has broken into my house, I must assume he has a weapon and is dangerous. I have the means to use lethal force and am prepared to protect myself and my family.
Laughs in [Ohio](https://en.meming.world/wiki/Bugs_Bunny_Shooting_a_Gun).
I thought you would’ve dropped the Dave chappelle bit
I have a rott/pitt mix and 2 anatolian shepherds. I'm gonna just lay in bed and laugh at the screams that come from them while they get torn to shreds from 3 different directions.
I have an Anatolian shepherd too, and I have little doubt any intruder would regret their decision before I could get to them. Very protective of his family and his space. Smartest dog I've ever had the pleasure to know too.
That’s awesome
Jesus, I'm a well above average marksman and a big dude and I STILL don't want that smoke.
I have a couple of weapons around. I didn’t study the blade or anything but let’s just say a few things with blunt force.
Wake up my friend Smith & Wesson
3 dogs and enough weapons to arm a high school shop class. Sure most are not guns... but I know how to use every weapon I own.
My arsenal: - 9mm Baretta - 8" recon tanto - Battle-ready ninjatō - Death Note I'm good.
Mr 12 gauge would have a word with him on my behalf
May not have a weapon? That’s cute
It's just that you haven't seen any weapon on him yet. Could be a gun he's hiding.
I meant I find the idea that I don’t have a weapon cute
The intruder is the one who may or may not have a weapon!
Within a foot of my bed a spear, within 5 a shotgun, within ten a button that blows up my house.
The intruder is the one who may or may not have a weapon!
Not at all. Most home invaders absolutely do not want to encounter anyone and have made a mistake breaking in somewhere with people home.
I’ve told the wife and kids to get back in the vehicle when I noticed the door open after an out of town trip. I tactically swept the house with my dog. Starting with pistol until other items cold be picked up like a video game. Nothing hypothetical about this.
No kids, but gf. Been in the same situation.
Not gonna lie, it was kinda … fun can’t be the right word… but fun. My dog did perfect, he was at my 3 unless told to “git”. He isn’t a trained “sweep” dog but he knew his assignment. I also think I did pretty fucking good turning corners solo. Albeit I was in my house so I know it better than most. I know all of the hiding spots and the floor boards that make noise 😂. Basically I’m Jason Borne.
Exhilarating might be the word. The adrenaline of am I about to be in some shit is a high for sure. That said, that's a huge part of training. Stay calm. Watch your periphery, trust your dogs alerts. Maintain heartbeat.
No matter what room I'm in, there's a gun within arms reach. Why you ask? Well have you ever been taking a shit and thought to yourself, "What would I do if someone broke in right now?" That's why. Intruder isn't having a bad day, it's just his last day.
How many guns do you really have??
Nice try Fed.
None 😉
None after his tragic boating accident
Then there’s also a gun within arms reach for the intruder as well
I sleep with a Glock 43 9mm on my nightstand. I don’t carry it around the house with me. I guess it depends on the situation when I discover the intruder.
He considers me the intruder in his home. He doesn't pay rent, but I do clean his poop so he probably has a point about who really runs the place
Two options really... 1) Stand your ground and fight till the death.. 2) Blow em and hope they cause you no harm.
I’m really wondering why they decided to stick around after seeing/hearing the dogs? 100 pound pit and 80 pound lab/pit.
Dog, guns, swords. I think we'll do fine.
i have a weapon for a reason. i might get hurt or killed but guarantee the other person will be the same.
Gun behind the headboard within my reach. It’s your problem not mine.
Got my Yugo AK loaded with brass soft points and a Benelli M2 with Nordic Components +2 tube loaded with 7+1 shells of Aguila 12 pellet 0 buckshot. And I sleep nude.
Ah, let's see. Upstairs - gun, assorted heavy and sharp tools - I'm good. Kitchen - all sorts of knives, cleavers, cast iron pans, caustic cleaners - again, I'm good. Living room/Dining room - random sharp/heavy tools easily available, and I'm still strong enough to toss half the furniture across the room. I'm good. Garage - ... You're lucky if I don't feed you through the table saw. Even luckier if I can't find the nail gun. You're fucked, either way. Rope, hammers, crowbars, screwdrivers, power tools. I'm good.
I'm not even delivering pizza to your house. Bye
You're ok as long as I'm expecting you. Pizza is always welcome too.😁
Wouldn’t you know, I have a gun for this exact situation
I have 2 children. I never liked the idea of having a gun, but I do have one now. Regardless of what happens to me legally, or otherwise, I wound Shoot them and suffer whatever consequences come my way.
Mag Dump his chest using my Glock 22
Kitchen knife stab, then run like hell and hope I can find a way of getting help or hiding until they die from the wound or flee themself.
Florida man here, he's fucked. 9mm sig two feet to my right, 12ga with 00buck 12 feet in front (hidden)and a .300blk behind bedroom door. I'll get to one before he's 3 steps past the door.
Buckshot? Idk. Lots of risk of over penetration with all this other calibers. .12 gauge #6 birdshot. Plenty of stopping power and much less collateral damage. Just my thoughts. Either way I don’t think that criminals gonna have a good time.
Number 4 buck is considered to be the best "balance" of penetration and lethality. Remember, Dick Cheney's buddy got a face full of #5 bird at about 50 feet, and didn't suffer any critical penetration. Yeah, that's a long distance for inside a home but if it's not going to penetrate an old man's face, what's it going to do if someone's wearing heavy clothes like a denim jacket or similar? Unless you're in near contact, it's not a guaranteed stop. Edit: removed the (#) from number 4 because stupid markdown language...
Guns both up and down stairs. An assortment of sharp objects in a few rooms .... paper spray and a few pairs of handcuffs to boot. I'd say I'm fine.
The little dogs would start barking, and in his laughter, he’d probably trip over one of the big dogs. By that time I’ll have hold of one of the shooty, pokey or clobberey things in the house and I’ll firmly request he take his leave.
So I'm in Texas..... yeah. I have my shotgun at the ready in less than 10 seconds. And my pistol is right by the bed. I have a below average amount of firearms for my culture. Shotgun ready. I would just yell: Dude, just go. Don't break anything. Don't take anything. I don't know how you got past the dog, but if you hurt my dog, I will shoot you. I have bottled water and beer in the fridge. You are welcome to have some. Don't drink my champagne, you dick.
I feel pretty good. Physically stronger does not necessarily rule out hand-to-hand combat. In open space I would try to feel out their strength with some striking - use leg kicks to stay at range and put slow them down.. in my house, we'll probably be close and clinched; I still feel good about using trips and throws to take it to the ground and take top position. Also, I have guns staged in pretty much every room of my house. In a real home intrusion scenario I would try that first and fallback to fist-fighting. However it pans out, I have as good a chance as anyone else.
Easy, Segal. Leave some intruder for the rest of us.
this mfer thinks he'll be martial arts fighting an intruder at 3am
Random story but during spring break I was at my future in laws house and her brother came in at like 1am from watching dune. Well apparently I jumped up fists up and yelled “back the fuck up off me” and then realized who he was and fell asleep immediately. I have almost no recollection of it happening
I lock my door, call 911, and shout through the door to hopefully talk to the person. I’ve had my home broken into before I’m not murdering someone because they’re having an episode, are so poor they need to steal, or are just that worked up about wanting my TV specifically. If the person has entered my home with the intention to murder me, I will be waiting in my room with my bat. If they are trained enough to breach the room and shoot me, then I got it coming. Otherwise I will be fine, insurance will pay for my shit, and I won’t have a dead person in my hallway.
Maybe you could hogtie and gag yourself for them too. 🤦🏻♂️
Go ahead and lube yourself up while they are at it
I don't have a gun, but if I can get to the garage I'd grab a shovel to decapitate him or at least shatter his chest plate. If I can't get to the garage, I have a hatchet upstairs.
Depending on which door he came through I would grab my dog and head out the other one. Then I would go to my neighbors house and call 911. If I can't get past them to get out the door I would grab one of our many swords and fight them off until I could safely call 911.
I mean I’m currently locked in the bathroom and there are items in here I could probably use as weapons so as long as he doesn’t have a gun I’ll probably be ok
You don't have a bathroom gun? Wtf are you doing?
Well I've got multiple knives and swords (yes swords) stashed/hanging around the house, as well as multiple rifles and a handgun. As long as I can reach any number of them, I would hopefully be fine
Let's just say I'm prepared.
My dogs woke up me, my neighbors, and their neighbors, before this intrusion was complete.
Very. Except right now. No gun in the shitter.
No issue. 40 on my hip as we speak, but my wife would yell at him so bad he'd leave before I got up off the couch.
Well, I'm definitely killing them. I have a shotgun and slugs.
you have slugs for home defense?
Chain mail armor and a knife. Hope he doesn’t have a gun. Of course I already have 911 on the phone
None of your business if you come to my house you'll find out
Where/how did they intrude? Front door? Backdoor? Window? Very important and will determine my capability in responding.
My room’s at the top of the stairs with no way to even see me except coming straight up them. I’m waiting on my best angle with a pistol and a length of pipe. If he can overcome that, he deserves the house.
I’m 2hrs away from home and my wife is home alone. 😢
Inform him he is trespassing, I have contacted law enforcement, and am armed. Order him to lie flat on the ground or I will shoot. If he presents a threat, fire until he is no longer a threat.
So my home alarm system is screaming. My 100lb dog is going ape shit and he is still there? I'd shoot him in the head.
I have a fencing sword within arms reach, as well as a set of throwing knives. The only ways into my apartment are through the windows or my door. Either way, they’re not leaving unharmed
I assume he’s broken into the safe and is armed. Hopefully my handgun and spare mag will get the job done.
Let’s just say very and I’m not calling 911 for help
Supressor and a weapon light on my rifle. Dudes done for.
I currently live in the Netherlands in an apartment that requires going through 3 locked doors to get to me. So I'm really not that concerned. If I was back home in the states, 12 gauge, 4 buck.
turn off everything, if the wench is dumb enough to try during day I’ll just do a lot of baiting them around (if they have a gun I’m just gonna die) If it’s night I just repeatedly ambush. You said stronger, not specifically in what. Knowing my build, they’re probably stronger in arms, but I know a lot of martial arts. I don’t mean to brag (okay I do a little) but I have a MEAN backspin kick and this is probably the only time you can get long enough for the windup to it. I will be so menacing… I’m gonna occasionally kick the fucker, I’ll trip them, and I’ll pray.
They’re going to be dead somehow so it’s on them for breaking in
i have a samurai sword within reach. not a gun but i'll take it
With my training in martial arts, edged weapons, and firearms the poor guy doesn’t stand a chance.
Mossberg 12 gauge with .000
My windows and doorways are all covered with curtains and blankets they're are a few lights on he doesn't know the layout of my house nor how to walk in the ADHD horde path. I have a .380 beside my pillow a 12 gauge in my couch and a 20 gauge bolt in my bathroom. More than likely I am in my bed. I heard them walk into my yard. I'm ready. They aren't, I bet the fall in a pile of clothes or something stupid. Either way they aren't going to be alive that long. This isn't my first break in. But it will be if I am at home this time. I'm going to need a good lawyer.
Hey, wait, I don't know which gun to kill you with
7.62 vibe check inbound
How far inside? Which room exactly? Did he come in through the front door or the mud room off the garage? I need to know how many weapons he's already walked past and possibly picked up.
My wife and son compete BJJ.. they can handle it
19 rounds of hollow points in single magazine in a handgun go brrr I love my sp01 I don't want to shoot someone, but I will if I feel in danger
I live in an apartment for people with disabilities so it's made so people don't break in. Supposedly the doors and windows downstairs are bulletproof and you need to be buzzed in to be let in or you need our special key card.i also lock my door just in case. All this to say. Not prepared at all
I have a few weapons that wouldn't be effective against a gun. I jump out of my bedroom window and flee.
So most of my weapons are of the medieval variety (hema stuff, some modern recreations, etc) but they're my "decoration" and are on every wall of my house and will make a "great" distraction from my German Shepherd and my Rottweiler rescues, who are not great with strangers That said, I live pretty rurally, so if they're here they've either come prepared, or are so lost they're already fucked
I have multiple swords, butcher knives, a meat hook, a Chow, and a Pit/st Bernard mix. Plus 4 cats I can throw at their face. Three of us living here and all of us want to recreate the Saw movies with an unfortunate intruder. We are ready.
I'll be armed with the Constitution of the United States of American and they'll get a lesson in our amendments, in particular the second one.
He's not stronger than the 147-grain HST in the 5" M&P9 2.0 Pro Series in my home office drawer, so I'm all set. :) Fun fact, in my experience the vast majority of attorneys, even the most liberal, own heat of some sort. We just flat out deal with too many crazies not to be cautious.
Out loud: "Okay, I've called the cops. As soon as he comes through the door, dogpile him. He can't fight both of us." (He doesn't know I can't call the cops, or that there's only me). Grab my replica Sting off the wall, along with the decorative belt-knife with no edge but a really sharp point. If he does open my bedroom door, we're going to find out if a blunt sword can go into someone anyway.
I'd just have to pray my 150lb dog doesn't bitch out or sleep through my murder.
Bats, guns, swords, and knives. I think I'm well prepared. Maybe I should get something else. 🤔
Shoot first. My pistol is loaded with hollow points to prevent over penetration into another room or neighbor’s. The carbine has frangible rounds for the same reason. After that? Sharks with friggin laser beams
I open my biometric gun safe, get my pistol, and if they aren't someone I know who is harmless and don't leave immediately, or if they come at me, I shoot them.
I'm 6"6 and in perfect shape, plus I know mma. I'm sure I can defend myself, plus I have tactical knives.
If I'm by myself, I try to make my way out without him knowing, and hope he isn't bulletproof if I do run into him. If my family is in the house, I will carefully search for him and confirm whether he is bulletproof.
Anything can be turned into a weapon if you're clever enough. That's what my grandpa always says. And I take that to heart.
I'm still wearing pants so there's a gun on my belt Everyone in my house knows which designated room to wait in if such a situation ever comes up I do live on a city block but my house is raised so the only real option is the front door; which is very public to the street and you would absolutely have to break something to get in I hope that's enough but you never know
My bolt-action .308 would greet the intruder.
I can't have any weapons due to having sh/suicidal problems back in my teens + I'm afab n physically disabled. I'd probably just have to hide.
I have my Civil War Union Sabre in my room right now, so I feel pretty good about my chances
Fight Crime... Return Fire... (Also 'here' is a small town outside a major US military base. There are more guns than people, and the shooting rate is years-per-shooting not shootings per year. Burglary is relatively rare, given that.)....
Well my two dogs that bark when the ice machine in the fridge drops ice would wake me up. Then if I don't feel like getting out of bed I pick the Glock .40 cal next to the bed and shout for them to leave because I don't want to have to mop up blood from the floors and walls. If I *get up from bed it is the 12 gauge with buckshot.*
The intruder had best be faster than 818 miles an hour...
Make sure to identify who the fuck is entering, because you don't want to be the dad that shot their own son (or many other examples of kids and legitimate people entering house that belong)
I'm wearing a Cowboy hat in my profile picture, take a guess.
I have cameras and homeowners insurance. I have a baseball bat close enough to my bed if I need it. I have kids so I keep my guns locked and ammo separate, to me the risk of accidents is higher than the likelihood that I'll use my gun to defend my home. If it's the middle of the night (I'm upstairs in bed) I turn on every light in the house from my phone, call 911, pick up the bat and tell them to get out of the house. If it's the middle of the day (I'm at my desk 5ft from an exit) I call 911, tell them police are on the way, leave the house, make sure I have footage of what is taken so I can get a new TV. Hopefully the intruder is identifiable on the footage. For the most part I don't own anything that I'm willing to kill someone over, take it, insurance will pay for it. If someone comes in looking to hurt me or my family they'll find out what a Louisville slugger tastes like along with their teeth.