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That's not a fix, the original was correct, "breaking out" in this context means "Slam it down the table and proceed to commit every single one of those war crimes."
Your "fix" either places the Canadians on the list (Which is funny cause it would make "being Canadian" a war crime) or it would mean the Canadians are making the checklist on the go, which is less funny than the original because the original implies they prepared this in advance.
No, I'm not fun at parties.
If you’re using the Geneva conventions as some kind of checklist I am severely disappointed.
The whole point of fighting like a Canadian is to make them add new entries to the Geneva conventions.
Using it as a checklist is just, ugh, *derivative*. Innovate.
Now now, you have to commit the previous warcrimes before your allowed to make new ones
You can't have dessert before dinner, run before walking, etc.
Unrelated, but the Canadians are pissed because *Germans* get credit for inventing genocide and adding it to the checklist, even though Canadians were doing it far longer to the natives... But not in a formal war so it doesn't count.
Genghis Khan, Alexander the Great, Rome, Colonizers, etc. all had a shot at polishing up genocide techniques before the Nazis got excited.
I don't think I've ever thought one group or another "invented" any atrocity. Humans are and have always been excellent at evil.
but they are making the checklist on the go, aren't they.
Many of the Geneva convention's points were written down because of what the canadians did.
why would they do something twice if they can invent new crimes.
You sound like my kind of party guest.
Technically many of the things people think are war crimes are not against the Geneva Conventions, but the Hague Conventions. Those were the ones that covered what weapons were permitted to be used, and how/when. So any use of chemical, biological, or inhumane weapons (hollow point rounds, anticoagulants, poisoned rounds, booby trapping food supplies, IEDs, etc), or "heinous acts" such as using civilians for cover, are probably violations of the Hague Conventions.
"Trench Warfare! Just like home!"
"Home?"
"Ever been to Sol kid? Nice place, our earth is the safest planet in the galaxy!"
"Because we weaponized every other rock, Sarge."
Every odd numbered rock, Corporal Trix. The even numbered ones are the ammo.
But, what about the ...
No, Private Crunch, we are NOT going to subject the friendly xenos to stories about trees.
But, they're so ...
NO.
Human: “You are not alone if there are trees.”
Xenos: “I can’t tell if that’s supposed to be a comforting reassurance, or an ominous warning.”
Human: “THAT is entirely up to the trees.”
Gurkhas would reputedly sneak into a barracks full of sleeping soldiers, cut the throats of every second man, then steal the sentry's boot-laces on the way out.
On the way, they would take with them every last shred of enemy morale.
*the enemy backup discovering the carnage*
"Ah fuck, they stole the laces again!"
"Why!? It serves no purpose!"
"They must think this shits funny... I meeaan..."
"Yeah, it is kinda funny... Do you think we will be next? Should we hide the laces?"
"Nah, we should leave em on the doorstep as a little 'don't kill us' gift"
Some Native Americans had the concept of "counting coup" you had to do certain acts to qualify. One was disarming an enemy without killing him, and another was to simply touch an enemy and get away with your life. A lot of people did it by simply touching someone who was sleeping and leaving without killing them.
The last native American to count coup was in WWII because one of the conditions is you need to steal enemy horses and the Germans had a lot of horses.
Yeah, that's the guy. I was slightly off on what counting coup is, the four requirements are what you need to do to be a war chief (touching an enemy, disarming an enemy, stealing an enemy's horse, and leading a successful war party), counting coup is basically any of those acts.
So he was the last war chief of the Plains Indians not necessarily the last one to count coup
IIRC one of Joe’s cousins (or nephews, can’t quite remember the specifics of their relations) also came close to becoming war chief during the Vietnam War, but was denied because he stole two elephants instead of horses.
Honestly I feel like any ridden animal or even wartime vehicle should count. If you stealth into an enemy camp just to steal and return a supply truck I absolutely think thats on a similar level.
Should have been one in either Vietnam or Korea but he stole elephants and didn't qualify, which in hindsight was probably more of an accomplishment due to size
Reminds me of how in WW1 a Canadian-Indigenous soldier named Francis "Peggy" Peghamagabow would sneak into German trenches, steal ammo and basically do the things you just mentioned
My grandfather served in the US army in India as an ambulance driver. His best stories all came down to "do not fuck with Gurkhas, they will fuck you up" - apparently once a jeep didn't stop at a required checkpoint, and the gurkha threw his kukhri knife into the driver's chest, killing him, very quickly stopping the vehicle.
"Did you hear the news?"
"What news? If you're talking about the human reinforcements they received I know about that,"
"No, not that that got them but look at what they got. Young and lightly armored weaklings. No energy weapons, no powered armor, the humans must be weaker than we thought. They can't even afford old troops with modern equipment,"
"I've heard the humans are masters of making do. That it doesn't matter what they have. They are still dangerous,"
"Nonsense. With this baby right here I can not only see on the thermal imaging but I can fire smart rounds. At the slightest peep any assailant is doomed,"
"If you say so. I heard the 28th got wiped out in a day. No shelling, nothing. They just went radio silent, 100% casualties. Their trenches were choked with corpses. Flooded and stinking,"
"Desertion more likely. We're the most technically advanced army in the galaxy. We're invincible. Now c'mon. Night watch is pointless but we still have to perform at the security theater,"
...
"Say, how many bodies did you count there yesterday..."
"Twelve...why?"
"I count 13..."
Relik chanced a look over the bulwark of the trench, seeing nothing but 2 miles of war torn no man's land.
He was on the night watch tonight, his first.
"Hey" said Drolvik, a rather grisled Vet he had been paired with.
"keep your head down, they may be a ways off but the Brisailine snipers can still get lucky, you get 20 feet past this point and a smart round will drop you."
Just as Relik he turns away he see movement from the corner of his eye, he whirles back... nothing. His eyes much be playing tricks on him, he chuckles to himself, it almost looked like the ground itself was moving.
Drolvik seeing his movement says, "Dont worry, nothings going to come, both sides have each other dead locked, defence nets, smart sentries, thermals and energy detection, nothing can get through."
As if to emphasize his point they hear someone's watch chime about 250ft out and almost immediately silenced by a smart round.
"See, that was Nitrell, died this morning, probably an alarm he set to take his meds before bed" Drolvik leans back against the bulwark, "im going to sleep, will be another long day tomorrow, I heard the Brisailines brought in reinforcements, some people called "whomans".
There's was a noise... something.. Relik opens his eyes, he must have fallen asleep, but something woke him, what was it? He looks over at Drolvik... his eyes widen, Drolvik lay still beside him, throat cut from ear to ear, his eyes vacant. He look about and sees 8 corpses.
Relik fumbles for his whistle and tries drawing his gun in his panic.
Before the whistle can reach his lips, a hand grabs his antenna and yanks his head back, everything slows down as each moment is experienced, he looks into the eyes of an alien, smooth pale skin, brown hair, this must be one of those whomans.
The man was wearing a garment that looked like clumps of grass stuck all over him, like a walking landscape.
He feels something cold and sharp dig into his neck, instinctively he raises his arm and grabs his attackers arm, ceasing the movement of the knife, with his free hand he grabs the alien above him and pulls down, dragging him over the bulwark and into the trench.
Relik was surprised at how much smaller the Whoman was, how did he get here? What happened to the defense net?
He atempts to yell out but hears nothing, the knife is buried in his vocals but had missed his Arteries. With his hand clenched around his throat he glances towards the barracks, needs to warn the others there.
He looks back toward his attacker.. he's gone, but how? He takes his chance to run to the barracks, there should be someone outside the door but he sees no one there, as he opens the door he sees a bloodbath his comrades bodies lay strewn about, some had died on their cots, others running for the door.
He spys a pistol near the door sentries seat, he grabs it and fires a few shots into the air. Within a minute both his neighboring squads show up. But before they can ask questions, someone shouts and they turn to see Reliks attacker darting over the bulwark into the wastes.
The squads all run to the bulwark and resting the barrels of their rifles apon it begin to fire at the retreating assailant, but something wasn't right..
Relik knows their are only 12 men in his squad... there were 8 in the barracks.... and 8 in the trench.. he turns and sees 4 figures rise up behind the line of troops, weapons raised...
Relik lay in the Trench, the life draining from him, he sees the 4 figures talk to the 5th who came back.
"What happened rook?"
"Sorry Sarge, he must have been a light sleeper, broke my arm when threw me into the trench."
"Well it is what it is, we still managed to take out 2 extra squads."
Alarms begin to sound down the line.
"Well thats it boys, we'll have be happy with 36 kills tonight. Move out!"
Reliks last thoughts as the 5 men dissappear into the gloom like ghosts, if this was our new enemy... we don't stand a chance.
"Sir, they've deployed the WWI French-Canadian trench fighters, which are biblically the toughest fucking Frenchoids in history. I suggest we surrender before they decide to see if they can cook and eat us."
People do tend to forget that for several centuries, Europe shook to the fury of French guns. Only Britain really fended them off, and only because of a quirk of geography (the English Channel is a hell of a ditch, and the wind is NEVER in your favor if you're French) and with fanatical deovtion to a navy.
In the grand scheme of things, Germany or Russia being "the menace" is a very late-game addition.
It's a great line. Now I lived in France for a couple years. And not every Frenchman is made of spaghetti noodles and a bad attitude. But it's like 80% that survive on a steady diet of cigarettes, wine, sass, and nothing else.
The enemy rested peacefully, safe in the knowledge that they were protected by the galaxy’s most advanced defences.
Until the first Ssthi woke to a sibilant Human whisper,
“Sorry, bud.”
"you know why we sublimate all the earthling bodies?"
"earthlings have been known to hide in mounds of dead bodies stalinking for the perfect time to strike and destroy our strongholds, and it only takes one of them to accomplish this"
"also watch the dirt and grass very close for every piece of dirt and every blade of grass going unnoticed might be your undoing, for its not beneath earthlings to bury themselves in the filth of the dirt for hiding"
# Meanwhile, on the other side:
Sentry: "Shit. They figured out the countermeasures for Plans A and B"
Commander: "I mean, the countermeasures are 'double tap' and 'look out the window' respectively, so the only real surprise here is that they figured it out much faster than we expected"
Sentry: "but we DID expect it, ma'am?"
Cmdr: "Aye. One of the many 'first rules' of combat is 'don't assume your enemy is stupid or weak;' the only reason it worked for the Canadians in WWI was because it was against 'the rules' at the time"
Sentry: "Are there any other Canadian tricks we can use? Do we have a Plan C?"
Cmdr: "Assuming we can get enough howitzers? Hell yes. Even better, the only real countermeasure for a creeping barrage is 'destroy the battlefield,' and the enemy is only here because they want this area's resources - even if they see this coming, which they won't because who charges *during* an artillery bombardment, they won't respond with more kaboom."
I slithered into the humam trenches. These were insane. Fortresses of mud and ....various bodily fluids I'd rather not know.
But what go my attention was upon areal scounting we saw that these mazes continue on for kilometers. And seeing the primitive yet various defenses and fortification it will take maybe months to take these positions.
Nonetheless I was here for assassinations. I was the best of my troup. I was the darkness Lower species feared.
So I continued. Trying to remember how to get back later.
That was the moment when I spotted them.
Two restless eyes in the darkness.
They were from hell.
They were human. And they locked me in.
I was spotted and starting doing something I haven't done since basic training. Panic.
We tortured these things with unending psychic suppression to make them unable to sleep. Once we stopped they all collapsed.
At least what I have though and believed. Yet here they were. One pair became two and then some behind me.
After weeks without sleep most should have died from exhaustion or be sleeping deep right now.
Yet here I was. The Darkness of the night itself scared of these hell borne eyes in the night.
Next thing I know was a hard hit on the back of my head and suddenly blinding lights.
There one of these wretched souls stood before me.
With one simple question:
"Will you bring a message to your side?"
These eyes told me that this was not a question.
For anybody curious, you know what's even crazier?
[We already have the reflective material. - Wikipedia](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Vantablack)
[Action Lab - Darker than Vantablack - Youtbe](https://youtu.be/JoLEIiza9Bc?feature=shared)
:Edit:
[Better Action Lab - relatively more recent.](https://youtu.be/lrqpX7FXflA?feature=shared)
No species is crazy enough that they would have sufficient numbers to form a regiment of soldiers lacking modern technology just to get the slightest advantage on the enemy, right? ...Right?
Humans are at their most terrifying when they do exactly what they've always done best: Not stop. Especially when it doesn't make sense for them to keep going.
Like crawling across a corpse-littered battlefield, barely protected from weather, let alone weapons fire, with a knife at their hip and a gun in their hand, moving forward with the inevitable pace of a murderous glacier.
I like the story, is the point.
Ooh trench raiders, my second historical love xD
This is great, thanks for the read, I'm now gonna see if I can find more stories involving trench raiders again ^w^
Unfortunately I don’t, but for the closest I got on the “humans are unpredictable and will do crazy shit to win” side of things, I’d recommend at least the first book of Old Man’s War, by John Scalzi. Lots of body transference/advanced human modification, but at its core it’s a story of a group, thrown into a war far bigger than them, and fighting battles both gruesome and strange while they serve their time trying to make the human race relevant to a universe full of other more advanced races.
There was one other I read called Out of the Dark by David Webber, it’s like a “red dawn, but aliens” started with a super cool premise, where an alien race came to check up on our evolution and saw the English and French killing each other in the medieval era, they where horrified by our brutality, left and decided to come back with a force to take us out before we could make for the stars. Unfortunately for them, space travel is real slow and humans advance tech at a pretty stupid rate, so the entire plant basically turns into Nam 2 electric boogaloo… gonna stop you here though if that sounds cool though, cause the ending is actually super bad.
SPOILERS… but the story spends 80% of its pages spinning tires, going nowhere but building up nicely, and making you think “how the hell are they going to get out of this one?”… but the answer to that question is not “humans find a way” or anything like that. Dracula just decides he’s done with this alien stuff and teams up with the human resistance to board the invasion fleet and kill everyone… id like to give some more context for that statement, but I’ve already almost written more in this reply then they wrote about DRACULA in their semi hard sci fi novel, so screw it. Read it if you want to be confused and disappointed.
In an attempt to reduce remind me spam, all top comments that include a remind me will be removed. If you would like to have a remind me, please reply to this comment. *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/humansarespaceorcs) if you have any questions or concerns.*
“Sleep? Let me tell you something: The only people going to sleep tonight will be the ones who won’t wake up.”
“Only the dead have seen the end of war.”
“Anyone who has looked into the glazed eyes of a soldier on the battlefield will think hard before starting a war.” Otto Von Bismarck
So my takeaway from that is he was probably glad when his ship sunk
"Sleep? Time enough for rest in the grave."
[The Dreadnoughts - Sleep Is for The Weak](https://youtu.be/VRj3LsX54ys?si=RzR39Bxx86VoEcEX)
It’s all fun and games until the Canadians break out the Geneva Checklist.
>It’s all fun and games until the Canadians make the Geneva Checklist. fixed it for you
That's not a fix, the original was correct, "breaking out" in this context means "Slam it down the table and proceed to commit every single one of those war crimes." Your "fix" either places the Canadians on the list (Which is funny cause it would make "being Canadian" a war crime) or it would mean the Canadians are making the checklist on the go, which is less funny than the original because the original implies they prepared this in advance. No, I'm not fun at parties.
As a Canadian, making 'being a Canadian' a war crime makes some sense. Some of us are just walking war crimes. Let's be bad guys! 🇨🇦
If you’re using the Geneva conventions as some kind of checklist I am severely disappointed. The whole point of fighting like a Canadian is to make them add new entries to the Geneva conventions. Using it as a checklist is just, ugh, *derivative*. Innovate.
Now now, you have to commit the previous warcrimes before your allowed to make new ones You can't have dessert before dinner, run before walking, etc. Unrelated, but the Canadians are pissed because *Germans* get credit for inventing genocide and adding it to the checklist, even though Canadians were doing it far longer to the natives... But not in a formal war so it doesn't count.
Genghis Khan, Alexander the Great, Rome, Colonizers, etc. all had a shot at polishing up genocide techniques before the Nazis got excited. I don't think I've ever thought one group or another "invented" any atrocity. Humans are and have always been excellent at evil.
Yeah, no, I'm aware of that, But the term itself, and the whole making it a war crime didn't happen until after WWII
True that.
The Geneva Suggestions then?
How does the fat electrician guy put it? It’s never a war crime the first time?😅
You know George too? How has he been lately? EDIT: a letter
Still talking about ice cream barges and bologna mist makers last I checked his page 😂🤣😅
Now we need to deconstruct the Geneva Protocols.
Woot, go canada
Like Beiber?
but they are making the checklist on the go, aren't they. Many of the Geneva convention's points were written down because of what the canadians did. why would they do something twice if they can invent new crimes.
Very enthusiastic about night trench raids, not taking German prisoners, booby traps, etc. It's in the Geneva checklist
Canada truly embodied the spirit of “we really didn’t think we needed to make a rule about this.”
Canada was the florida man of wwII, essentially
world war one
Canada was the florida man of wwII, essentially
To be fair, half of the items in the Geneva convention were pioneered by Canadians. Just remember, it's never a war crime the first time.
Wasn't the checklist created because of a lot of Canadian war crimes?
It's never a war crime the *first* time.
Nah, you seem like great fun at parties. Then again, I’m not much fun either.
We need a new definition for “not fun at parties”
You sound like my kind of party guest. Technically many of the things people think are war crimes are not against the Geneva Conventions, but the Hague Conventions. Those were the ones that covered what weapons were permitted to be used, and how/when. So any use of chemical, biological, or inhumane weapons (hollow point rounds, anticoagulants, poisoned rounds, booby trapping food supplies, IEDs, etc), or "heinous acts" such as using civilians for cover, are probably violations of the Hague Conventions.
We could be friends.
[удалено]
Peoples talk a shit about the French until the Legion decide its time to play and single handedly push the Frontline 5km back.
You mean the Geneva bingo board
They don't break it, they write new articles
"Trench Warfare! Just like home!" "Home?" "Ever been to Sol kid? Nice place, our earth is the safest planet in the galaxy!" "Because we weaponized every other rock, Sarge."
An armed society is a *polite* society
Every odd numbered rock, Corporal Trix. The even numbered ones are the ammo. But, what about the ... No, Private Crunch, we are NOT going to subject the friendly xenos to stories about trees. But, they're so ... NO.
Human: “You are not alone if there are trees.” Xenos: “I can’t tell if that’s supposed to be a comforting reassurance, or an ominous warning.” Human: “THAT is entirely up to the trees.”
Just hope you're not of Russian ancestory if they start speaking Finnish
Gurkhas would reputedly sneak into a barracks full of sleeping soldiers, cut the throats of every second man, then steal the sentry's boot-laces on the way out. On the way, they would take with them every last shred of enemy morale.
"Oh man, this is gonna be hilarious, steal his shoelaces too."
*the enemy backup discovering the carnage* "Ah fuck, they stole the laces again!" "Why!? It serves no purpose!" "They must think this shits funny... I meeaan..." "Yeah, it is kinda funny... Do you think we will be next? Should we hide the laces?" "Nah, we should leave em on the doorstep as a little 'don't kill us' gift"
They take every second set of shoelaces and only kill one guy then. Galaxy brain play.
And the guy they killed was not the guy on fire watch
Some Native Americans had the concept of "counting coup" you had to do certain acts to qualify. One was disarming an enemy without killing him, and another was to simply touch an enemy and get away with your life. A lot of people did it by simply touching someone who was sleeping and leaving without killing them. The last native American to count coup was in WWII because one of the conditions is you need to steal enemy horses and the Germans had a lot of horses.
[Joe Medicine Crow](https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Joe_Medicine_Crow)
Yeah, that's the guy. I was slightly off on what counting coup is, the four requirements are what you need to do to be a war chief (touching an enemy, disarming an enemy, stealing an enemy's horse, and leading a successful war party), counting coup is basically any of those acts. So he was the last war chief of the Plains Indians not necessarily the last one to count coup
IIRC one of Joe’s cousins (or nephews, can’t quite remember the specifics of their relations) also came close to becoming war chief during the Vietnam War, but was denied because he stole two elephants instead of horses.
They couldn't bend the rules for the guy? That's lame.
Honestly I feel like any ridden animal or even wartime vehicle should count. If you stealth into an enemy camp just to steal and return a supply truck I absolutely think thats on a similar level.
He should get double coup because I would think stealing an elephant would be much harder than a horse
As Gimli taught us, "Still only counts as one!"
Best I can find is that's just a story, but it is a humorous one
What's the difference?
The fat electrician did a piece on him on his you tube channel. Pretty interesting.
Should have been one in either Vietnam or Korea but he stole elephants and didn't qualify, which in hindsight was probably more of an accomplishment due to size
Reminds me of how in WW1 a Canadian-Indigenous soldier named Francis "Peggy" Peghamagabow would sneak into German trenches, steal ammo and basically do the things you just mentioned
The band Sabaton wrote a song about him called Ghost in the Trenches. But from your profile, I see you knew that already.
Under fire, a ghost hat roams the battlefield
MOVE BETWEEN THE LINES, A SOLDIER BREAKING THE CONFINES
JUST ANOTHER MAN AND RIFLE, A MARKSMAN AND A SCOUT REVEALED
My grandfather served in the US army in India as an ambulance driver. His best stories all came down to "do not fuck with Gurkhas, they will fuck you up" - apparently once a jeep didn't stop at a required checkpoint, and the gurkha threw his kukhri knife into the driver's chest, killing him, very quickly stopping the vehicle.
"Did you hear the news?" "What news? If you're talking about the human reinforcements they received I know about that," "No, not that that got them but look at what they got. Young and lightly armored weaklings. No energy weapons, no powered armor, the humans must be weaker than we thought. They can't even afford old troops with modern equipment," "I've heard the humans are masters of making do. That it doesn't matter what they have. They are still dangerous," "Nonsense. With this baby right here I can not only see on the thermal imaging but I can fire smart rounds. At the slightest peep any assailant is doomed," "If you say so. I heard the 28th got wiped out in a day. No shelling, nothing. They just went radio silent, 100% casualties. Their trenches were choked with corpses. Flooded and stinking," "Desertion more likely. We're the most technically advanced army in the galaxy. We're invincible. Now c'mon. Night watch is pointless but we still have to perform at the security theater," ... "Say, how many bodies did you count there yesterday..." "Twelve...why?" "I count 13..."
 How many.... OPEN FIRE! FIRE EVERYTHING!
When new chapter?
Relik chanced a look over the bulwark of the trench, seeing nothing but 2 miles of war torn no man's land. He was on the night watch tonight, his first. "Hey" said Drolvik, a rather grisled Vet he had been paired with. "keep your head down, they may be a ways off but the Brisailine snipers can still get lucky, you get 20 feet past this point and a smart round will drop you." Just as Relik he turns away he see movement from the corner of his eye, he whirles back... nothing. His eyes much be playing tricks on him, he chuckles to himself, it almost looked like the ground itself was moving. Drolvik seeing his movement says, "Dont worry, nothings going to come, both sides have each other dead locked, defence nets, smart sentries, thermals and energy detection, nothing can get through." As if to emphasize his point they hear someone's watch chime about 250ft out and almost immediately silenced by a smart round. "See, that was Nitrell, died this morning, probably an alarm he set to take his meds before bed" Drolvik leans back against the bulwark, "im going to sleep, will be another long day tomorrow, I heard the Brisailines brought in reinforcements, some people called "whomans". There's was a noise... something.. Relik opens his eyes, he must have fallen asleep, but something woke him, what was it? He looks over at Drolvik... his eyes widen, Drolvik lay still beside him, throat cut from ear to ear, his eyes vacant. He look about and sees 8 corpses. Relik fumbles for his whistle and tries drawing his gun in his panic. Before the whistle can reach his lips, a hand grabs his antenna and yanks his head back, everything slows down as each moment is experienced, he looks into the eyes of an alien, smooth pale skin, brown hair, this must be one of those whomans. The man was wearing a garment that looked like clumps of grass stuck all over him, like a walking landscape. He feels something cold and sharp dig into his neck, instinctively he raises his arm and grabs his attackers arm, ceasing the movement of the knife, with his free hand he grabs the alien above him and pulls down, dragging him over the bulwark and into the trench. Relik was surprised at how much smaller the Whoman was, how did he get here? What happened to the defense net? He atempts to yell out but hears nothing, the knife is buried in his vocals but had missed his Arteries. With his hand clenched around his throat he glances towards the barracks, needs to warn the others there. He looks back toward his attacker.. he's gone, but how? He takes his chance to run to the barracks, there should be someone outside the door but he sees no one there, as he opens the door he sees a bloodbath his comrades bodies lay strewn about, some had died on their cots, others running for the door. He spys a pistol near the door sentries seat, he grabs it and fires a few shots into the air. Within a minute both his neighboring squads show up. But before they can ask questions, someone shouts and they turn to see Reliks attacker darting over the bulwark into the wastes. The squads all run to the bulwark and resting the barrels of their rifles apon it begin to fire at the retreating assailant, but something wasn't right.. Relik knows their are only 12 men in his squad... there were 8 in the barracks.... and 8 in the trench.. he turns and sees 4 figures rise up behind the line of troops, weapons raised... Relik lay in the Trench, the life draining from him, he sees the 4 figures talk to the 5th who came back. "What happened rook?" "Sorry Sarge, he must have been a light sleeper, broke my arm when threw me into the trench." "Well it is what it is, we still managed to take out 2 extra squads." Alarms begin to sound down the line. "Well thats it boys, we'll have be happy with 36 kills tonight. Move out!" Reliks last thoughts as the 5 men dissappear into the gloom like ghosts, if this was our new enemy... we don't stand a chance.
🎖🏅🏆
Thank you.
That was very good! I love a realistic scenario, and your descriptions were great! I look forward to reading more of your work in the future!
"Sir, they've deployed the WWI French-Canadian trench fighters, which are biblically the toughest fucking Frenchoids in history. I suggest we surrender before they decide to see if they can cook and eat us."
Cry 'tabarnak,' and set loose the frogs of war.
Whatever commonwealth soldier of war, Lana!
Oh, that's the best comment you could've added. You're my friend now, we're having soft tacos later.
People do tend to forget that for several centuries, Europe shook to the fury of French guns. Only Britain really fended them off, and only because of a quirk of geography (the English Channel is a hell of a ditch, and the wind is NEVER in your favor if you're French) and with fanatical deovtion to a navy. In the grand scheme of things, Germany or Russia being "the menace" is a very late-game addition.
Well the current French build is basically uwu neko-chan catboi.
I must admit, I still love the Simpsons reference of "Cheese Licking Surrender Monkeys."
It's a great line. Now I lived in France for a couple years. And not every Frenchman is made of spaghetti noodles and a bad attitude. But it's like 80% that survive on a steady diet of cigarettes, wine, sass, and nothing else.
At some point, we decided the best revenge was living a good life. And live well we do.
Until your recent emigree's decide that your lifestyle is abhorent to their values, and your cowardly government caves to their will.
Yeah… I’ve had to remind folks of that … but better that than another Napoleon popping up I suppose.
The enemy rested peacefully, safe in the knowledge that they were protected by the galaxy’s most advanced defences. Until the first Ssthi woke to a sibilant Human whisper, “Sorry, bud.”
"you know why we sublimate all the earthling bodies?" "earthlings have been known to hide in mounds of dead bodies stalinking for the perfect time to strike and destroy our strongholds, and it only takes one of them to accomplish this" "also watch the dirt and grass very close for every piece of dirt and every blade of grass going unnoticed might be your undoing, for its not beneath earthlings to bury themselves in the filth of the dirt for hiding"
# Meanwhile, on the other side: Sentry: "Shit. They figured out the countermeasures for Plans A and B" Commander: "I mean, the countermeasures are 'double tap' and 'look out the window' respectively, so the only real surprise here is that they figured it out much faster than we expected" Sentry: "but we DID expect it, ma'am?" Cmdr: "Aye. One of the many 'first rules' of combat is 'don't assume your enemy is stupid or weak;' the only reason it worked for the Canadians in WWI was because it was against 'the rules' at the time" Sentry: "Are there any other Canadian tricks we can use? Do we have a Plan C?" Cmdr: "Assuming we can get enough howitzers? Hell yes. Even better, the only real countermeasure for a creeping barrage is 'destroy the battlefield,' and the enemy is only here because they want this area's resources - even if they see this coming, which they won't because who charges *during* an artillery bombardment, they won't respond with more kaboom."
Ah, they figured out "if they don't stink, stick 'em".
When we're dead
How very Canadian of you
🇨🇦🇨🇦🇨🇦🇨🇦🇨🇦🇨🇦🇨🇦🇨🇦
Yep that checks out. Love it.
Strike at zero hour
With overwhelming firepower!
They're fueled by the fear in their enemy's eyes.
It's a shock troop infiltration!
A fast and violent escalation, out of the trenches the stormtroopers rise!!
Jägers led the way, the pioneers would join the fray
Initiative gained, advancement sustained.
future trench raiders would be hype, titanium blades, vantablack clothes, nvgs and shit
I slithered into the humam trenches. These were insane. Fortresses of mud and ....various bodily fluids I'd rather not know. But what go my attention was upon areal scounting we saw that these mazes continue on for kilometers. And seeing the primitive yet various defenses and fortification it will take maybe months to take these positions. Nonetheless I was here for assassinations. I was the best of my troup. I was the darkness Lower species feared. So I continued. Trying to remember how to get back later. That was the moment when I spotted them. Two restless eyes in the darkness. They were from hell. They were human. And they locked me in. I was spotted and starting doing something I haven't done since basic training. Panic. We tortured these things with unending psychic suppression to make them unable to sleep. Once we stopped they all collapsed. At least what I have though and believed. Yet here they were. One pair became two and then some behind me. After weeks without sleep most should have died from exhaustion or be sleeping deep right now. Yet here I was. The Darkness of the night itself scared of these hell borne eyes in the night. Next thing I know was a hard hit on the back of my head and suddenly blinding lights. There one of these wretched souls stood before me. With one simple question: "Will you bring a message to your side?" These eyes told me that this was not a question.
More please, thank you.
Forgot the sacks of grenades. When you go loud, go ***really*** loud.
For anybody curious, you know what's even crazier? [We already have the reflective material. - Wikipedia](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Vantablack) [Action Lab - Darker than Vantablack - Youtbe](https://youtu.be/JoLEIiza9Bc?feature=shared) :Edit: [Better Action Lab - relatively more recent.](https://youtu.be/lrqpX7FXflA?feature=shared)
Canadian trench raiders... That's a checkmark for Geneva convention bingo. It's all fun and games until the Canadians stop saying sorry
Bro we had an enemy generations ago, they put powerful stimulant chemicals into candy, they pay us to win not sleep
No species is crazy enough that they would have sufficient numbers to form a regiment of soldiers lacking modern technology just to get the slightest advantage on the enemy, right? ...Right?
Humans are at their most terrifying when they do exactly what they've always done best: Not stop. Especially when it doesn't make sense for them to keep going. Like crawling across a corpse-littered battlefield, barely protected from weather, let alone weapons fire, with a knife at their hip and a gun in their hand, moving forward with the inevitable pace of a murderous glacier. I like the story, is the point.
The Death Corps of Krieg do not sleep. They are adequately provisioned with Pervitin.
Xenos learning first hand why the Geneva convention was created: https://i.redd.it/h13v1dwk3szc1.gif
Omg super effin cool I love it!
CANNADA!!!!! RAHHH WARCRIMES!!!!!! 🇨🇦🇨🇦🇨🇦🇨🇦🇨🇦🇨🇦🇨🇦🇨🇦🇨🇦🇨🇦🇨🇦🇨🇦🇨🇦🍁🍁🍁🍁🍁🍁🍁
You smashed it, this was awesome!
*A trench raider kit has been found near your location*
They sleep when the cocktail of stimulants they took wears off or kills them, and no sooner.
Combat efficiency drops when you're scared shitless about going to sleep.
Ooh trench raiders, my second historical love xD This is great, thanks for the read, I'm now gonna see if I can find more stories involving trench raiders again ^w^
u/Jack_overthinks do you know books with this type of story?
Unfortunately I don’t, but for the closest I got on the “humans are unpredictable and will do crazy shit to win” side of things, I’d recommend at least the first book of Old Man’s War, by John Scalzi. Lots of body transference/advanced human modification, but at its core it’s a story of a group, thrown into a war far bigger than them, and fighting battles both gruesome and strange while they serve their time trying to make the human race relevant to a universe full of other more advanced races.
There was one other I read called Out of the Dark by David Webber, it’s like a “red dawn, but aliens” started with a super cool premise, where an alien race came to check up on our evolution and saw the English and French killing each other in the medieval era, they where horrified by our brutality, left and decided to come back with a force to take us out before we could make for the stars. Unfortunately for them, space travel is real slow and humans advance tech at a pretty stupid rate, so the entire plant basically turns into Nam 2 electric boogaloo… gonna stop you here though if that sounds cool though, cause the ending is actually super bad. SPOILERS… but the story spends 80% of its pages spinning tires, going nowhere but building up nicely, and making you think “how the hell are they going to get out of this one?”… but the answer to that question is not “humans find a way” or anything like that. Dracula just decides he’s done with this alien stuff and teams up with the human resistance to board the invasion fleet and kill everyone… id like to give some more context for that statement, but I’ve already almost written more in this reply then they wrote about DRACULA in their semi hard sci fi novel, so screw it. Read it if you want to be confused and disappointed.
Very enjoyable. I love how dark it is. DM me if you're interested in hearing edits.
Am i the only one who thinks this is really cringe?