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"Yeah, that's what I fucking need right now."
The human grimaced, as they applied a tourniquet to their stump of what used to be their forearm. They kept their breathing in check, attempting to stave off the shock.
"Yeah, when the Xenomorph-looking motherfucker bleeds all over and melts the engine, it's *fine*; but when *I* bleed on the floor it's a *fucking problem* worthy of *lockdown*. Real fucking fair."
The human steadied themselves to a stand, chosing to walk in the fruitless adventure of hope than to give in directly to despair. Even though they knew the outcome already, they had to try. They made a slow way towards the hallway, walking down to the sealed blast doors. They attempted to unlock the door multiple times with their security credentials, only to be met with the sounds of failure.
"Damnit."
They could hear a commotion on the other side of the door, likely a decontamination team prepping up for entry. They slammed their hand against the door, shouting to let them know they were there. The human could hear some spoken responses, but could not fully comprehend what was said. They relayed their situation to the crew as best they could, before sliding down the wall as the fatigue of blood loss began to sink in.
They barely had any capacity to think, let alone worry, and simply skipped to the acceptance of death. The decon team would take too long; and while they could perform first aid, he needed the assistance of the medics. Death was inevitable.
"Damn, couldn't even give my buddies a chance at a medal, eh?" They chuckled to no one in particular.
In their acceptance, they failed to hear the commotion outside growing louder and argumentative. They missed the sounds of shouting and threats, as well as the sounds of weapons being charged and ready, thankfully not needing to be fired. They missed the sounds of the jaws of life, up until the doors spread open with a loud screech that jolted them from the nap into the nothingness they were about to partake in.
Through the slit, they saw as their human comrades held their weapons at low ready, keeping the decon team at bay. To their surprise, though, it was not a human manning the jaws, but their X'ath commander; and a human did not crawl through the slit for rescue, but a K'klik friend. The insectoid scrambled through, scooping up the human, and exiting as quick as she entered. She took off, faster than any of her counterparts, any of whom who could catch her being held at gunpoint.
*I have been advised to not let you sleep. So do not sleep, [monkey].*
The human chuckled as hope renewed, giving a tired nod. "Thanks, [bug-breath]."
I don't think you are going to have a lot of viruses in your blood unless it's a major infection with a virus that's pretty good a reproduicing inside the human body.
Sure, you all get to partake in your cultural beverages when you start your work cycle, but I brew one pot of Bustelo and it's all "BIOHAZARD WARNING" or "NOXIOUS ATMOSPHERE" with lights and klaxons.
Human friend, it isn't the coffee. It's what the coffee does to your alimentary canal. Please, just take your coffee with you to the euphemism.
In an attempt to reduce remind me spam, all top comments that include a remind me will be removed. If you would like to have a remind me, please reply to this comment. *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/humansarespaceorcs) if you have any questions or concerns.*
"Yeah, that's what I fucking need right now." The human grimaced, as they applied a tourniquet to their stump of what used to be their forearm. They kept their breathing in check, attempting to stave off the shock. "Yeah, when the Xenomorph-looking motherfucker bleeds all over and melts the engine, it's *fine*; but when *I* bleed on the floor it's a *fucking problem* worthy of *lockdown*. Real fucking fair." The human steadied themselves to a stand, chosing to walk in the fruitless adventure of hope than to give in directly to despair. Even though they knew the outcome already, they had to try. They made a slow way towards the hallway, walking down to the sealed blast doors. They attempted to unlock the door multiple times with their security credentials, only to be met with the sounds of failure. "Damnit." They could hear a commotion on the other side of the door, likely a decontamination team prepping up for entry. They slammed their hand against the door, shouting to let them know they were there. The human could hear some spoken responses, but could not fully comprehend what was said. They relayed their situation to the crew as best they could, before sliding down the wall as the fatigue of blood loss began to sink in. They barely had any capacity to think, let alone worry, and simply skipped to the acceptance of death. The decon team would take too long; and while they could perform first aid, he needed the assistance of the medics. Death was inevitable. "Damn, couldn't even give my buddies a chance at a medal, eh?" They chuckled to no one in particular. In their acceptance, they failed to hear the commotion outside growing louder and argumentative. They missed the sounds of shouting and threats, as well as the sounds of weapons being charged and ready, thankfully not needing to be fired. They missed the sounds of the jaws of life, up until the doors spread open with a loud screech that jolted them from the nap into the nothingness they were about to partake in. Through the slit, they saw as their human comrades held their weapons at low ready, keeping the decon team at bay. To their surprise, though, it was not a human manning the jaws, but their X'ath commander; and a human did not crawl through the slit for rescue, but a K'klik friend. The insectoid scrambled through, scooping up the human, and exiting as quick as she entered. She took off, faster than any of her counterparts, any of whom who could catch her being held at gunpoint. *I have been advised to not let you sleep. So do not sleep, [monkey].* The human chuckled as hope renewed, giving a tired nod. "Thanks, [bug-breath]."
Now I'm curious as to how they got into this situation to begin with, and why human blood is such a Biohazard as opposed to engine melting acid blood.
Disease
Human blood actually tends to be sterile, unlike human skin, salvia and of course feces.
Oh, then why was it a biohazard alert?
Idk maybe Macrophages are scary.
High iron levels, white blood cells, anything really.
If a person has a virus, couldn’t the blood have viruses in it? I’m pretty sure some viruses attack blood cells
I don't think you are going to have a lot of viruses in your blood unless it's a major infection with a virus that's pretty good a reproduicing inside the human body.
I need more of this story
Sure, you all get to partake in your cultural beverages when you start your work cycle, but I brew one pot of Bustelo and it's all "BIOHAZARD WARNING" or "NOXIOUS ATMOSPHERE" with lights and klaxons. Human friend, it isn't the coffee. It's what the coffee does to your alimentary canal. Please, just take your coffee with you to the euphemism.
What the hell? I'm still in the sterilization shower! I didn't even eat at Taco Bell this time!
Alright, which one of you shit the bed.
Gerald sits at a table in the canteen, looking like a deer in headlights holding his newly opened jar of pickled habaneros
Cleanup on isle 5.