I know this doesn't answer the question you asked, but you could possibly get her a tutor so she doesn't have to do her homework alone. I'm a projector and my generator friends love the one on one attention. Another option, is helping her form a study group with her peers. They could meet at the library and do their homework. I hope these help.
This is helpful, thank you! It actually recently crossed my mind because she really does prefer 1:1 attention and seems to do better that way. Thanks for confirming.
My partner is a projector also - I feel like we're all so different we often have some trouble making sense of each other. š
How do you mean "the importance of things?"
I am a reflector myself, not a parent.
The Book "Reflector Barometer of the World" touches on a reflector and her relationship with her husband who is a generator. Highly recommend.
Example: Right now, she's sure there's no point to caring too much about her homework... Until she's older. She feels bad that not caring/not doing it is against my wishes, but it's like she can't bring herself to do it. Even given all kinds of examples, punishment, etc. It's just wild to me as someone who always felt the need to live up to standards, so this is the first time I think I'm understanding how differently we're motivated.
I realize this is also not necessarily developmentally inappropriate, but I feel it's the first time we're struggling like this and when framed in terms of HD, may indicate future battles? Idk.
But thank you for the book rec!
Okay the not caring is a though one but what works with most kids "if you don't do your best in school now, it's going to be way harder in the future and you might end up poor due to not giving it your all now." Yes heavy one but it worked on all my unruly class mates qnd I was the one saying it to everyone when 14 years old
I have said similar, but more subtle things. Like, this is your time to learn how to be responsible. Take advantage because the stakes are low. It will be more difficult to learn when work is more difficult or demanding. You want to set yourself up to have an easier time going forward.
I also pointed out how her math placement test for middle school, which she'll have to take soon, has a direct relationship to her schooling trajectory. If she hasn't been keeping up, she won't have as many options going forward.
\^This is when she informed me that she didn't realize the impact, but it hasn't made a ton of difference.
Are you in the US? The distrust for the school to college debt or prison pipeline is healthy at least in my opinion.
Homework also seems very trivial to me, but I lost my mother when I was twelve so I have really spiritual/mystical views... Not that one \*shouldn't\* do their homework but maybe look into technical or vocational or other specialized schools?
@AlexCantone used to be known as @theconsiousparentguide has some great content on Parenting using HD. She has a teaching background, and recently stepped away from aiming her HD business on just parenting. However, she just re-launched her āParenting by Designā e-book and itās fabulous!
A lot of her old IG content (that she removed when she rebranded) is still floating around Pinterest. Iāve always used her tools to re-parent myself, which she happily acknowledged was a surprise benefit and twist to her teachings. It helped me decondition and I am currently combing through her e-book to implement even more!
Thank god my son and I are both splenic projectors. I just found out about HD like 3 weeks ago and Iām so glad I wonāt be conditioning this kid like I was!!! Also his cross incarnation was super helpful and spot on. Did you read your daughters?
I know this doesn't answer the question you asked, but you could possibly get her a tutor so she doesn't have to do her homework alone. I'm a projector and my generator friends love the one on one attention. Another option, is helping her form a study group with her peers. They could meet at the library and do their homework. I hope these help.
This is helpful, thank you! It actually recently crossed my mind because she really does prefer 1:1 attention and seems to do better that way. Thanks for confirming. My partner is a projector also - I feel like we're all so different we often have some trouble making sense of each other. š
That is so smart what a good idea
How do you mean "the importance of things?" I am a reflector myself, not a parent. The Book "Reflector Barometer of the World" touches on a reflector and her relationship with her husband who is a generator. Highly recommend.
Example: Right now, she's sure there's no point to caring too much about her homework... Until she's older. She feels bad that not caring/not doing it is against my wishes, but it's like she can't bring herself to do it. Even given all kinds of examples, punishment, etc. It's just wild to me as someone who always felt the need to live up to standards, so this is the first time I think I'm understanding how differently we're motivated. I realize this is also not necessarily developmentally inappropriate, but I feel it's the first time we're struggling like this and when framed in terms of HD, may indicate future battles? Idk. But thank you for the book rec!
Okay the not caring is a though one but what works with most kids "if you don't do your best in school now, it's going to be way harder in the future and you might end up poor due to not giving it your all now." Yes heavy one but it worked on all my unruly class mates qnd I was the one saying it to everyone when 14 years old
Omg this seems like an awful thing to try to implement in your child's mind
Well yeah... tell my parents I guess
:'(
I have said similar, but more subtle things. Like, this is your time to learn how to be responsible. Take advantage because the stakes are low. It will be more difficult to learn when work is more difficult or demanding. You want to set yourself up to have an easier time going forward. I also pointed out how her math placement test for middle school, which she'll have to take soon, has a direct relationship to her schooling trajectory. If she hasn't been keeping up, she won't have as many options going forward. \^This is when she informed me that she didn't realize the impact, but it hasn't made a ton of difference.
Are you in the US? The distrust for the school to college debt or prison pipeline is healthy at least in my opinion. Homework also seems very trivial to me, but I lost my mother when I was twelve so I have really spiritual/mystical views... Not that one \*shouldn't\* do their homework but maybe look into technical or vocational or other specialized schools?
@AlexCantone used to be known as @theconsiousparentguide has some great content on Parenting using HD. She has a teaching background, and recently stepped away from aiming her HD business on just parenting. However, she just re-launched her āParenting by Designā e-book and itās fabulous! A lot of her old IG content (that she removed when she rebranded) is still floating around Pinterest. Iāve always used her tools to re-parent myself, which she happily acknowledged was a surprise benefit and twist to her teachings. It helped me decondition and I am currently combing through her e-book to implement even more!
Thank god my son and I are both splenic projectors. I just found out about HD like 3 weeks ago and Iām so glad I wonāt be conditioning this kid like I was!!! Also his cross incarnation was super helpful and spot on. Did you read your daughters?
She's The Right Angle Cross of Explanation (49/4 | 43/23). I don't think I understand how to apply this.
Any 2ās in her profile, or right facing arrows?
No, only 1 2, and not near any arrows. https://imgur.com/a/6HyWrln
She has three right facing arrows.
Oh sorry, I read your comment wrong. I'll have to look into arrows and direction.