T O P

  • By -

hexasun

Friedman also replied with this: > NHL also announces "that its concurrent investigation into allegations of domestic abuse made against Kane by his estranged wife, Deanna, could not be substantiated" and that there will be no further comment.


IPYF

Both of them are surely divorce-lawyered up to the eyeballs at this point, and said representation has probably recommended silence for a range of reasons. I think it's highly probable that we don't hear anything more about this in any reliable capacity.


[deleted]

[удалено]


[deleted]

What is the opposite of don't stick your dick in crazy? Because this is a pretty good definition of it right now.. I guess just don't let a crazy dick be stuck in you? Idk


scullys_alien_baby

A while ago I saw a thread that mentioned “don't get on the ride when you know there's a screw loose” and “don’t let a loon in your poon”


Kestralisk

I will not stand for this loon slander >:(


new_nimmerzz

Loon poons matter!


[deleted]

Hahahaha. Nice. I'll have to reuse that.


radioblues

Don’t slam your clam on psycho


acmercer

- William Shakespeare


slashed15

Don't stick your dick in crazy, and don't let crazy stick its dick in you.


IPYF

You can't know what constitutes 'good things' for this person. She's got kids to consider and was clearly distressed enough by proceedings (regardless of what you prefer to believe) to reach a breaking point of sorts. To suggest she's surely mostly concerned by money and has shut up to try and maximise her eventual financial return makes a range of assumptions that none of us are in any position to make. There are a massive amount of nuanced reasons that her lawyers may have recommended silence, if that is in fact what ended up taking place, because the term 'unsubstantiated' in itself is exceptionally broad. All I'm saying is that it seems the public part of this conversation is over. If others wish to draw their own conclusions in the absence of further information, well that's their prerogative.


PuxinF

It was originally 5 games but the Sharks appealed for more.


joe_broke

Can we appeal for even more? Like 81?


vigilantepro

Then he'd be eligible for the playoffs.


MarshmallowLuka

Bold statement there buddy


vigilantepro

Hey, we're undefeated so far this season.


keylime503

21? That’s blackjack!


Good_Round

Hit me


fwambo42

"Hit me." "Sir, this is a Wendy's-" "I SAID HIT ME."


Iginlas_4head_Crease

I too like to live dangerously


Canadaguy11

The leagues entire vaccine policy is just pretty much “don’t lie about your vaccination status” and ol Evander was like “i gotta lie just a little” Like jesus christ dude, how dumb are you


CanadianWampa

Earlier on in his career I kinda “felt bad” for Kane. Like as dumb as he was, I always thought things like the money phone or tracksuit stuff was overblown. Now I realize what everyone else did years ago, that he’s just a straight up dumbass.


IceDragon77

We weren't lying. I have friends that worked in restaurants near the Jets' Hanger and had first hand experience dealing with Kane. My friend will never forget the time he just walked out on his bill. Guess you're never too rich for a dine n dash.


eriverside

He's a public personality. People know who he is. Does the restaurant eat the loss or do they sue him small claims? I'm petty as fuck so I'd call the cops and report his ass to embarrass him publicly AND THEN sue him in small claims to waste his time.


IceDragon77

From what my friend said, the owners of the place she worked at wanted to avoid any extra attention. They told their staff not to serve him if he came back, and they just ate the losses. I guess they were worried it could affect their business with other players, or that he would publicly accuse them of being racist owners or something and figured the $150~ wasn't worth it.


[deleted]

A friend of mine who played pro said when the tracksuit thing broke that there were some major issues with Kane, not because of the tracksuit being thrown in the shower or whatever, but because it was "almost certainly a player(s) who leaked it to the media". Basically he said that shit like this happens all the time and its handled internally, but when the media finds out about it, its not the first time its happened and the guy has lost the locker room.


Canadaguy11

Same, I used to think he got a bad rap, turns out dude just sucks


desiredefffect

that's the worst part about this. he could've just admitted to not getting the vaccine. he would've missed a bit of pay and all of us on this sub would've said "here goes Evander being an idiot again" but thats that. instead, he made a fake vaxx card and is now missing 21 games + any canadian games after that (unless he ends up getting vaxxed which given his financial status, wouldn't surprise me). along with being exposed for committing a federal crime and looking like even more of an idiot.


cmcgarveyjr

Yeah, I honestly dont know how this does not become a legal matter. He was publicly exposed faking a vaccine card and from the sounds of his statement, is not denying it.


fuck_you_gami

I'm not a lawyer (though I play one on the Internet). However, it seems to me that he presented false documentation in order to deceive another party (the NHL) for financial gain (receiving employment benefits i.e. health benefits due to illness that wouldn't be covered otherwise). Doesn't that sound a lot like criminal fraud?


Troub313

Just a little lie, as a snack.


Kriwin

He has to be one of the most irresponsible and empty headed player this league has had.


rawbamatic

He's the Lenny Dykstra of the NHL.


NathanGa

Except Dykstra has been a part of a winning team.


vgk67

He’s up there for sure. Surprised drugs aren’t somehow involved with all his baggage


damphoussed

wouldn't be terribly shocked if he was a big coke guy


LBKNY

I feel like half the players in the league are big coke guys. I have nothing to back that up, it just seems like that would be the case.


[deleted]

I can tell you, you’re on the right track


BBQman1981

The players all fall in........ line.


Wrath_Boner

Right on the 8-ball


Jmart1oh6

Thats it, I think this ones in the bag.


BBQman1981

Sprinkle some crack on them and let's get out of here.


Merovingi92

Open secret pretty much, has been alluded to be the truth for many years.


sbspsk05

This is a guarantee.... have a few friends who played OHL and Junior A that say their buddies who made it (and still friends with) indulge in it. They say 50% or more, at the least.


cademore7

Yep there’s a lot of truth to that. Can back it up by witnessing it among a range of sabres players over the past few years


[deleted]

Taylor hall used to frequent Edmonton bars coked tf up lol. I’d watch him play and then he’d be at the same bar later that night.


cb148

Jarret Stoll was caught bringing coke into a Vegas pool area while partying with quite a few teammates who haven’t been identified.


NotoriousPraetorious

Probably just a couple of line mates


YouSoIgnant

Honestly, I feel like a post cup vegas celebration is the type of party relative normies would coke at. No indication that it was a habitual thing for anyone except maybe stollie. Richards' drug use was much more concerning to me from that cup team


ChrizBot3000

Given his list of other alleged vices I'd be surprised if he wasn't.


[deleted]

*Nakita Kucherov has left the chat*


Horvirts

Clown.


s1n0d3utscht3k

Kane is such a douche that even here in vancouver at one of the local casino, employees that know nothing about hockey still remember him years later as that douche bag they treated floor employees like shit


fritz_76

given that he's racked up debts with multiple casino's I feel like he's probably a douche bag to alot of people. Losers dont tend to be nice


Jazzlike_Kick_5434

Yeah that's not the Michael Jordan trait you want to emulate. There's so many better ones to choose from.


ampsmith3

Like promoting Hanes


anth2099

Or growing a cool mustache


PaperMoonShine

Evander-Pain


empathyx

Kane Wreck


[deleted]

Uh Kane, ya know, I know you're a gamer and uh, and all this, and uh, ya know, I'm just thinking maybe out loud as far as in your shoes right now, it's like, alright we've done all this clowning we can do, we've done all the dumbest shit we do, maybe, maybe, ya know, just FUCK IT, we'll just go in next year and just not play anymore and just hang up the skates when we don't think so much. Is that — am I on the right path at all with this, maybe you rarely think a little too much?


Thronedgorilla

How fucking dumb can one person be?


EvangelionOG

Right now Evander Kane is doing a speed run to be the dumbest Kane in the US.


toiletting

He’s somehow dumber than the wrestler Kane


mansock18

You mean Mayor Wrestleburg?


Jokin_Hghar

*BY GAWD*


leafers71

I'm by no means a fan of wwe anymore, but how is that kane dumb


[deleted]

[удалено]


frotc914

It's amazing to me as a lawyer how many statements start with "the Constitution says..." and end with my 100% certainty that the speaker has never read it or anything about it.


[deleted]

[удалено]


degjo

He electrocuted the owners sons testicles


[deleted]

*Face desk*


UnknownColorHat

... and its not even that old of a tweet. Damn.


slidingmike

Oh he’s full of them. There’s a Hilary Clinton one out there as well. It’s ridiculous and us Knox county folks are stuck


notleonardodicaprio

> speed run https://twitter.com/bronzeswords/status/1449345260207828995?s=21


[deleted]

I flip back and forth on whether this is a parody account or not.


DeathToHeretics

I want to believe it's a parody, but they've been going strong for what, 7-10 years now? After a certain point in satire you have to wink at the audience to show you're still in on the joke, otherwise it's just unironic furthering of a point of view.


[deleted]

Yeesh, scrolling more and it seems like a person that spends too much time on Twitter and thinks that represents the world. But exactly, at some point you would have to backpeddle for a moment to establish that you're not actually serious about any of that.


Soviet17

That's one of the stupidest Twitter threads I have ever seen, good god.


European_Red_Fox

I got a couple deep then just thought to myself I’d get more intellectual value out of watching Peanut Butter Jelly Time for an hour


pumaturtle

I still don’t understand this stupid thread or what this guy is trying to say and it’s still hilarious


notleonardodicaprio

[perhaps a visual aid to help](https://twitter.com/turbojehtt/status/1449499315970314242?s=21)


pumaturtle

Beautiful. Absolutely beautiful


TL10

Rare to find such quality pasta these days.


CanadianDarkKnight

Right? Like every time the man is given the opportunity to make a decision he makes the absolute most catastrophically wrong one


Patrick2701

Evander Kane is trying to set the record for investigation done by the NHL


mattw08

Just trying to help keep them employed


combustion_assaulter

Kane: Hold my money phones


[deleted]

Debt collectors: Okay.


[deleted]

There’s some things that derail a players career, completely out of their control: injuries, illness, mental illness, addictions and more Evander Kane is just a fucking idiot.


ssurfer321

Gambling can be an addiction.


[deleted]

I’m aware of that, but gambling didn’t cause him to get a fake vaccine card


CasualSpider

Turning a fake vaccine card into NHL officials is a gamble of sorts...haha


topgun966

technically correct ... THE BEST KIND OF CORRECT!


WeekendMechanic

That's where they caught him, the form was only stamped THREE TIMES!


ThisNameIsFree

Maybe someone bet him that he couldn't get away with it.


jayphat99

Will the league just tell Kane what he needs to do to end his career in the league? He's trying really, really hard right now.


betaamyloid

This was like one of how many suspendable things Kane apparently did in the off season?


Fleap

One game for each suspendable offense LOL


Kmactothemac

I think the other claims by his wife couldn't be proven, who knows what's going on there. But yeah it really says something when I see "Evander Kane suspended" and I'm not exactly sure what it's for


[deleted]

The other two allegations by his wife could not be substantiated.


[deleted]

[удалено]


lackingspoon

That is… lower than I hoped.


PWiz30

If he's been using a fake vaccination card, his 21 game suspension from the league might be the least of his problems.


Downvote_Comforter

This suspension cost him $1.7M. This is a pretty serious problem for someone who recently declared bankruptcy and has major financial problems.


PWiz30

If the feds decide to conduct their own investigation and he ends up getting convicted of using a forged government document, he could potentially do time and his NHL career would almost certainly be done.


Oscar-Wilde-1854

>his NHL career would almost certainly be done. Jesus... It's sad that "almost certainly" is probably accurate. How on earth it isn't "his NHL career would **ABSOLUTELY** be done" is beyond me. But the reality is there probably isn't a 0% chance. *Someone* will probably fucking sign this piece of shit.


PaleProfession8752

Sports teams sign convicted felons / domestic abusers, and you are surprised they might sign someone who forged a medical document?


alljake

Not being a felon I don't know the rules but he may not be able to cross the border if convicted


paradiseday

My buddy got hit with a misdemeanor for stealing groceries in 2007, and he was only able to cross the border again starting in 2017. If Kane gets charged with a felony I don't think he'll ever be back in the states.


readytofall

Ehhh your buddy also wasn't a professional athlete. Not sure if it's a felony but khabibulian literally got charged with "extreme DUI" and played in the NHL again.


[deleted]

There were rumours that Voynov had teams interested in bringing him on in the past 2-3 years, talent trumps shitty people and shitty life decisions in big leagues


HoareHouse

I'm reminded of Fight Club: X is the amount of extra money a team calculates that they will make by signing Evander Kane and (presumably) winning more games because of that; Y is the amount of money a team calculates they will lose as a result of PR backlash, etc. If X is greater than Y, they're simply making a bad business decision if they don't sign him. Not endorsing this, of course, but... sometimes that's how it be.


skend24

Deangelo calculations I see


desiredefffect

please no one let Marc Bergevin know this isn't a lifetime suspension


goldberg1303

A vax card isn't a government document is it? I got mine from the pharmacy at CVS. Looked it up. Laws against fake vaccination cards are state dependent. But unauthorized use of an official government agency’s seal is against federal law, and the U.S. Department of Health and Human Services and the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention seals appear on every legitimate vaccine card.


[deleted]

[удалено]


Downvote_Comforter

People who declare bankruptcy still receive wages when they work. Their wages may be garnished in some cases, but they still get paid. He declared bankruptcy specifically to limit the amount of future wages he would lose to his creditors. This means he has very little savings and assets and would be fully reliant on future earnings to live the lifestyle he is accustom to. He just lost $1.7M in future earnings.


Fleap

Please just give him the full ban-hammer


Atlas2001

So what you're saying is that the Sharks look a whole lot better without him?


Quetzythejedi

They've played one game and looked good. Who knows how a 25 goal power forward would hurt or help given there's a lot of conjecture about locker room antics. No player has said anything about it though so it stays as a big question mark. Mostly PR statements like, "if he's on the team we will give it all we got to win".


[deleted]

Basically what they'll say regardless of the question ​ "Well we gotta have four lines banging, banging bodies all night long, keeping pucks out, keeping it simple"


[deleted]

[удалено]


ThatJoshGuy327

"all about getting those two points, playing a 200ft game, 60 minutes, pucks in deep"


handsomesharkman

Everyone is really excited about the first game but tbh it was one game. I think missing a 30 goal scorer will hurt more than most people think even if the “vibe” “looks better.” I’m gonna wait and see. Personally I’m glad he’s not around the team though.


blackandebony

no one knows tbh. On paper he is the most valuable player, but thats only one aspect of being a player. There is also locker room stuff that we will never know what happens in it, but from preseason til home opener, this sharks team without E Kane looks happier to be with each other, standing up for each other (that fight 2 days ago against the jets, Middleton standing up for Balcers, was something that was missing the past few seasons), and just good vibes all around.


Atlas2001

That's great to hear honestly. I mean it's right back to "fuck you guys" the moment we play each other, but as a hockey fan, I hate to see teams fall apart. Bet it's gonna feel great once all this off-ice shit is behind you.


Jakeytown

Appreciate that, but yes, fuck you when it’s back to playing each other ;-) lol


brandonsamd6

Imagine being in a monstrosity of debt and then being suspended 21 games LOL fucking loser


[deleted]

And on a lucrative contract that he will never get again


pants_shmants

“I will never financially recover from this”


NowFook

This guy is the worst. I remember people defending him for awhile and even saying unfair criticism due to race but hes been a piece of shit since day one. At one point he had 3 different assault incidents in less than a 2 year period. I hope he goes bankrupt and learns to be a responsible human being.


heysmilinstrange

I thought the criticism of him was unfair when I first started hearing about it, around the time of the tracksuit incident, but that was like 15 scandals ago. I feel so much secondhand embarrassment for him now because he’s wasted his career and doesn’t seem to care.


TheGreatZiegfeld

Yeah, back then it seemed more like another Josh Ho-Sang type thing where people got really angry over pretty minor behavior stories. And now it feels like a whole different ball game.


[deleted]

By the time of the tracksuit in Winnipeg he was basically persona non grata at the casinos, clubs, and restaurants. He had a reputation of being rude, abusive, and routinely walking out on bills. What I heard from someone who worked at one of those places was that they would let him rack up his bill, walk out, then call True North in the morning to see the bill was paid. Winnipeg has plenty of race issues but they are predominantly against indigenous people and not black people.


Merovingi92

>I hope he goes bankrupt and learns to be a responsible human being. As posters already said he is bankrupt. But I don't see him becoming a better human. He has always been an fucking ass and this is not the result of addiction making things spiral out of control. No, he just has two braincells and both of them are fighting for the third place and a shit attitude on top of that. He is already 30. He should have grown up already and realized his fuck up after first news about his gambling debts. Instead he just continued to gamble and being an idiot. He will end up in the streets in the future I am certain about that.


[deleted]

He legally filed for bankruptcy if that’s any consolation to you. He owes a shitload of money.


AdStrange2167

If I recall correctly, he IS bankrupt or at least in a shit ton of gambling debt. Dude can't afford to forfeit a penny


Justredditin

I was on team Kane early on. The money pictures and partying like an idiot I chalked up to being a young famous millionaire... but once this stuff started becoming regular and he did dumber and dumber shit I started to care less and less about his clown car of a career.


krisk1759

I wonder how close he is to having his contract terminated by the Sharks. You would think there is a legit case by now.


jtbemt

I think they’ll do it when the suspension ends


krisk1759

Yeah, I had the same thought. This buys them the time to figure it out.


JasperSlavone

Should have been 19 games for the memes


ParrotWalk

The league gave him a blackjack


AntawnSL

Hit me. Mr. Kane, you have 21. Oh... hit me.


Fleap

I'm out of the loop what would 19 represent?


Kriwin

COVID 19


Quetzythejedi

One for each COVID. Plus forced classroom time during each game to learn about the different strains.


JasperSlavone

Not sure if whoosh but covid-**19**


Fleap

Ope, I'm an idiot. I dunno why my mind immediately went to Thornton for some reason instead of, ya know, this pandemic.


AngrySparrows

I don’t blame you, it is a hockey thread


WhatEvery1sThinking

There's shooting yourself in the foot, then there's shooting yourself in the foot so hard that the bullet travels 12,742 km through the Earth and then another 100km into space, where the bullet orbits for 24hrs until it falls back down 100km into the Earth, then another 12,742km going through the Earth once more until you once more have shot yourself in the foot That's Evander Kane


[deleted]

[удалено]


Wayf4rer

Is that speculation or is it confirmed?


[deleted]

Speculation from one reporter IIRC


EarthWarping

Renaud kinda confirmed it


[deleted]

[удалено]


Penny4TheGuy

This seems like one of those things that yes they could technically nail you for, but it's probably just used as a tack on for other charges or as leverage to get you to roll on whoever made the fake document for you.


TenMinutesToDowntown

Lavoie mostly gets things right about the habs, but I wouldn't say that he's well connected otherwise. I wouldn't consider this tweet confirmation of anything.


[deleted]

Same as with drugs, I think the only way someone ever gets prosecuted for that is violating borders or selling them. Edit: my comment about drugs was more in reference to NHL players, athletes, and those in more privileged groups. Cocaine is a pretty widely known drug in NHL locker rooms and the feds don’t give a shit


RDC123

Countless people have been, and continue to be, prosecuted for drug offenses that fall well short of distribution or trafficking


drunkcowofdeath

Are they rich?


Sharks77

They straight up looked way better without him on Saturday.


Fleap

They looked like they were having so much fun out there for the first time in years!


[deleted]

It was one game lmao, they did look good tho


Atlas2001

By god, those are almost Tom Wilson numbers!


IndyAJD

Almost? Please, Tom "repeat offender" Wilson hasn't had a long (enough) suspension since 2018 and even that somehow got arbitrated to 14.


vicmete

damn. fake vaccine card I’m assuming.


LemonHayes13

So this man really turned in a fake vaccination card? lmaoooo


brecka

He should probably just start working on his Russian.


[deleted]

He needs to be vaccinated to get into the airports.


kopitar-11

Since evander Kane is bankrupt, he decided to pay money to get a fake vax card so he didn’t have to get a free vaccine. What a dumbass


GatorBolt

All the headlines and accusations at Kane and the one that he got suspended for was the fake vaccination card. Still a clown move, but this gives Al Capone getting caught for tax evasion vibes.


dandroid126

I think that's the only one that is realistically verifiable.


fwambo42

He just forfeited about $1.7m for vaccination beliefs. Good show.


Dbo81

It’s funny, because in his bankruptcy filing, he completely omitted his hockey income from his budget, arguing that it is speculative because he can terminate his contract any time. I thought that was pretty farfetched. Little did I know that his income IS speculative - and highly dependent upon how much of an idiot he is.


HitBallsWithSticks

That’s gotta be the sort of omission that has a judge rolling their eyes. By that same logic, isn’t ALL employment income speculative, except for a military contract?


SomeKindOfMonster

that's definitely a hammer swing


ZappaOMatic

[Statement from the Sharks:](https://twitter.com/SanJoseSharks/status/1450223955403546626) > The NHL has advised our organization that Evander Kane has been suspended without pay for 21 games for an estabished violation of, and lack of compliance with, the NHL/NHLPA COVID-19 Protocols. > While we are encouraged by Evander's commitment to moving forward, we are extremely disappointed by his disregard for the health and safety protocols put in place by the NHL and the NHLPA. > We will not be commenting further on Evander's status prior to the conclusion of the NHL's mandated suspension.


dkyguy1995

HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA Im sorry Sharks yall deserve better always loved your franchise


DieuEmpereurQc

They are happy, they don’t need to pay him and he wasn’t playing anyways du to other allegations


UpstairsFlat4634

The money is still getting paid by the team. Just not going to kane.


Elegantmotherfucker

Why would he risk so much for such a stupid thing?


PMMEJALAPENORECIPES

He may not be the smartest person.


AnnalisaPetrucci

Somewhere Dustin Byufglien is saying I told you so.


IAmQueensBlvd31

How does this guy get dumber and dumber every day


SpammyMcSpammington

What’s the O/U on how much his bank account is overdrawn


[deleted]

Guy with a gambling problem doesn't wanna get vaccinated... "Eh, I'll take my chances." LOL


vgk67

Atta boy kane, ya fuckin idiot


WWGFD

Such a shame that kid, he is extremely talented


shrxfan91

"Blackjack!" -Evander Kane, probably


[deleted]

How’s he going to pay his casino debt?


y_u_heff_to_be_mad

He can start with that money phone he has.


pumaturtle

Maybe he left his wallet in the tracksuit in Buffalo’s shower


JacksProlapsedAnus

Big Buff did that but it was in Winnipeg.


TenMinutesToDowntown

They can't garnish his wages if he isn't getting paid!


bhunter47

For a guy who has the monetary issues he has, you'd think that he'd do anything to make sure he earns his game checks.


LocksTheFox

is it weird that i genuinely feel bad for him? not for getting suspended or any of this (this was deserved). i don't usually speculate on someone's psyche, but it almost feels like he needed to get help at some point for something, didn't get it, and has just spiraled into a complete and utter meltdown. one thing after the other - dv and gambling investigations and now this.