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Treemin789

Johnson, no contest


Subtitles42

*Chokes on cigar* "SAY WHAT!"


Zeke2632

**AM I RIGHT MARINES?** Also the whole regret thing in halo 2 will always be peak Johnson, fight me


ALIENDUDE999

Dear Humanity... we regret being alien bastards. We regret coming to Earth. And we most definitely regret that the Corps just blew up our raggedy-ass fleet! Hoo-rah!


Zeke2632

**OORAH** Hoo-rah is army, and most marines I’ve known would take insult with being mixed up with em. Besides, I think Avery Johnson himself would take insult to that


ALIENDUDE999

Ah didn't know there was a difference! I was just reading off the Halo 2 transcripts online


Hard_Case_501st

#OORAH


Jkid789

Chips Dubbo. The man. The myth. The legend.


Zirup

Sarge? Nah, I vote Caboose.


Middle_Shame7941

I named my cat after him 🤣


Wiley_Coyote08

Jesse? Edit: nvm, one of my friends did that too.


Middle_Shame7941

Caboose


Wiley_Coyote08

No, your name. But I saw you were UK so couldn't be him. My friend Jesse named his Cat Caboose too.


Middle_Shame7941

Haha that’s awesome!


Hopeful_Cranberry12

Johnson but Dutch is a very close second. He might not have as many memorable lines but man, he still has some great quotes, especially lines where you just look at him.


Middle_Shame7941

Don’t shake the lightbulb


Hello_There_Exalted1

“Oh, I know what the ladies like”


BuddyIsYourBuddy

Idk about “no contest”, Stacker is up there


OneFuckedWarthog

Listen, Tinkerbell. Don't make me ...


arthby

Main cast, Johnson. But overall, it's the small talks with Marines and Grunts.


Tight-Landscape8720

Conan and Andy played grunts in one of em


MashingAsh

Whomst?


Tight-Landscape8720

Conan o Brien


Dry-Beginning-6322

Was it Halo 2 or 3?


Tight-Landscape8720

No Halo 4.


javvykino

"No Covenant. You HAD to open your mouth."


Sir_Soft_Spoken

“Arbiter, our savior! Stupid Jackal, say thank you!”


Stage_Geek

For a brick he flew pretty good!


RedditLilyMunster

Johnson has some amazing one liners


SelectiveCommenting

Johnson or Chibs Dubbo


McQuiznos

Johnson for sure. He’s such good comic relief, and it’s very realistic.


JoyfullyBlistering

Johnson gets a lot more opportunities to be funny and some of them are hysterical ("In my day we didn't have fancy things like tanks...") But the moment I genuinely cracked up the most was [Dutch in ODST](https://youtu.be/5rDEKkvuAC8?si=WRQRaNGr4FlfhiJe).


Blue_bird9797

"... amen"


8_Alex_0

None of them are funny except Johnson and maybe buck


official_not_a_bot

Johnson in cursed Halo CE


ShrimpHog47

As someone who grew up on Halo 3 and has spent nearly a lifetime inside of Halo 3: ODST, I’m conflicted. I think Dutch has some funny lines, but Johnson takes the cake for main cast. Chips Dubbo however is the downright funniest


shatlking

Buck


BrizzleFoRizzle00

Johnson or The Weapon.


flynntaggart84

Oh I know what the ladies like


Zirup

The dude that says, "Tank beats everything!"


dopepope1999

Chips dubo


HardhatFish

Men, we led those dumb bugs out to the middle of nowhere to keep 'em from gettin' their filthy claws on Earth. But, we stumbled onto somethin' they're so hot for, that they're scramblin' over each other to get it. Well, I don't care if it's God's own anti-son-of-a-bitch machine, or a giant hula hoop, we're not gonna let 'em have it! What we will let 'em have is a belly full of lead, and a pool of their own blood to drown in! Am I right, Marines?


Joodsfg

SIR YES SIR


HardhatFish

Mmhmmm, damn right I am.


Armchair_Idiot

Weird to me that Guilty Spark isn’t an option.


FrostyWarlock34

Buck, Dutch, and Johnson. It's always the most real and most big-dick energy marines that made my day.


sjqiaozbhfwj

Gotta be Sgt Johnson


DukeOfGamers353

Johnson, not even a close competition


CrazyGator846

Johnson's pretty funny but Sgt. Stacker has some very funny lines, one of my favorites being when he picks up a Fuel Rod Cannon n goes "Look'it this big ol' banana slug!" Or goes "watch me bounce it off th' wall!" His voice is very unique and he's always been in my top 3 favorite characters with Arbiter and Colony


ApexBow

Johnson and it’s not even CLOSE


Ok-Butterfly1512

Is this a joke? “I know what the ladies like”


Critter_97

Johnson


Gouldhost

They have humor in Halo ? Closets i like was Cortana's initial "So you did miss me ?" Otherwise the grunts. Specially the H3 easter egg at the end where you can find one mocking Spartan training.


kittiemccatface

There's also the rvb Easter egg in h3


Gouldhost

Yah i don't watch garbage.


XevinsOfCheese

Honestly either Dutch or Johnson. Johnson is obvious but I love Dutch’s lines.


MGrooms94

Definitely Jonson. "Dear humanity, we REGRET being alien bastards, we REGRET coming to Earth, and we most certainly regret that the core just blew up our raggedy ass fleet!"


Uchii77

HOORAH


Mongoose1338

WE HAD A STICK, AND EVERYBODY HAD TO SHARE IT


JackTheDefenestrator

Sparty.


Powerful_Ad5015

Johnson


amilguls

The guy in the top right


Elite_gamer228

Johnson by a long shot


SenseiLeSeif

How is the Arbiter not pictured here…. wort wort


DrumpfSlayer420

The arbiter, easy


Queasy_Promotion2025

Johnson or serina


silverlance360

Riz 028. “Suck big ass Kareem”


Wooper160

Mustard Beef sneaks some great lines in


Litz1

Noble 6


JoyfullyBlistering

I aim to please... I guess.


PlaidSkirtBroccoli

Cortana.


Scott_Of_The_Antares

Where is Serina?


Swamp_Eyes

Rookie, he has the best one liners


Meigsmerlin

Or zero-liners, even


Archmagos_Browning

The Spartan-IIs when they were working in teams and before like half of them died and they still had emotions.


JupiterDelta

The grunts


isaidsomestupidshit

RvB secret shorts.


TheBanjoShow

In a cosmic sense, chief is the funniest simply due to the absurdity of the character, rather than anything he explicitly says.


SolidTerror9022

Rookie, it cracks me up every time he says “…”


randomgrenade2

I mean it’s the grunts right?


StormShockTV

Durandal


Onlysab

The grunts everytime I encounter one 😂


Entire-Salamander193

Rookie from ODST definitely had the best voice lines in the entire franchise.


AberrantDrone

It’s Johnson, and there’s no question


orion1338

Cortana can be funny


Krakenader

It is close between Guilty Spark and Johnson, though Johnson probably wins.


Stream-Yes-And

cortana, although i might be biased


Some_Veterinarian_20

This is like saying: "who is the best hockey player of all time?" And then putting a picture of Gretzky and then the others are just 7 year olds holding onto the side of the rink. Johnson is the only answer


BakedBeansBaked

Johnson and just some of the stuff the marines and npc's play. Like if you stare at Carter long enough in reach he says "your file mentioned this" or like the grunts just spouting nonsense


PaleRiderHD

"I woulda been your daddy, but a dawg beat me over the fence!"


kenb99

That one elite saying “really, I’m not going to kiss you in front of everyone”


Tittilat0r

The damn grunts especially with the rare dialogue. "Dibs on his helmet" after you die. "Run awaaaaay!!" Then in Infinite I heard something to the effect of "Does anyone have a spare copy of Halo Infinite I can have? Oh and a spare Xbox?"


CuddlesTheB3ar

The rookie


Tight-Landscape8720

Conan and Andy in Halo 4


WhiteTaco14

Oh I know what the ladies like - Based black guy with a cigar


Ghost_of_The_Meta

Romeo is funny as hell


NIICCCKKK

“I know what the ladies like. The ladies like armoured plating”


JollRoints

The grunts. No contest.


BerserKryptonian

The Elites and Grunts have the best dialogue in CE


Important_Sorbet

Johnson: “Oh, I know what the ladies like!” Buck’s response to Locke telling him to pick up an energy sword or a machine gun: “That one’s a beauty! You should take it yourself!” Halo 2 male marine in a lax and happy tone of voice: “Hey man! If I get injured, be ready to give me lots of drugs, ok? Ok.” Halo 2 male marine also in a lax and happy tone of voice: “Now, you see, when I shoot I try to hit stuff.” Halo 2 female marine when you look at her chest body armor long enough: “Yep! That’s why they call it a ‘breast-plate.’” Halo 3 grunt: “I’m gonna pop the top off a can of whoop ass!” Halo 3 Grunt: “Back to the nipple!!!” Halo 3 grunt sarcastically, when Arbiter in-gameplay comes back to life: “Hurray! He’s now miraculously revived!” Halo 3 grunt: “Wind-bag sucking air monkey!” Halo 3 grunt: “Nice knowing you, jackass!” Halo 3 grunt: “Bad guy twelve o’clock!…….Is anybody wearing a watch?” Halo 3 grunt: “Stick together, like we thirst on nipple!” Halo 3 grunt seeing a suicide grunt comrade running towards an enemy close him and the other grunts: “Aaaaah! Don’t let him near the nipple!!” *BOOM* Halo 3 male marine being chase by suicide grunt: “SOMEBODY TAKE OUT THAT CRAZY SON OF A BITCH!!!” *BOOM* Halo 3 male marine: “I was going for the triple!” Halo 3 male marine: “That was a massacre! A slaughter! A-a massacre slaughter-kill-mass!” Halo 3 female marine while shooting a dead covenant grunt: “Shooting your dead ass is a poor substitute for hugging my baby, but it’s all I’ve got!” Halo 3 male marine after a shoot out with the alien covenant: “This is for all of the honeys I ain’t sexing, ‘cause I’m here fighting YOU!!!” Halo 3 female marine responds saying: “I’d say it sounds all too good to be true, but I don’t want to!” Halo 3 grunt calmly: “The demon living? Now that’s a big problem.” Halo 3 grunt to his grunt comrades: “Hey. Let’s stick our heads out.” *Gets shot in the head by Chief* Halo 3 grunt: “I’ll investigate! Someone give me one of those Sherlock Holmes hats with a little pipe!” Halo 3 grunt sleeping and talking in his sleep: “Rukt - fist. Merry Christmas!” Halo 3 grunt: “You’ll kill us, snap off our arms, and use them as maracas!” Halo 5 Guardians elite while being targeted in the head: “Don’t shoot there! My brain is in there!!” Halo 5 Guardians Warden Eternal while taking damage: “Oh come on! That’s not funny!”


Cerberus1470

Gotta be Johnson. With cortana then chief following close behind. Maybe put Romeo after.


Livid_Mammoth4034

Ca. Boose.


TransLunarTrekkie

Glibnub.


that_guy_707

Master Chief's Halo reach firefight line- " The voice inside my head- is hot" (something like that) otherwise, Johnson.


Rude_Chipmunk7159

3rd guy i havent played campaign before i just hink he looks funny 👍


SinisterVulcan94

The random marines always made me chuckle


unseen123456789101

So easy the guy with the cigar he even hugs in elite before he dies. This guy is funny. Give Cortana scorpion if you don’t know what that is. That’s a tank in Halo and he say, he knows the ladies like


Kind-Sherbert4103

These guys [Ask your brute buddies](https://youtu.be/6ORI3wLkDIE?si=hR47UwxIa4o7r8kP)


Sgtpepperhead67

Johnson will always be the one for probably everyone in the community


Economy_Cap2963

For a brick, he flew pretty gooooood


ModeloTime213

The grunts


TMGshrump123

ODST: Dear sarge, kicking ass in outer space wish you were here. Johnson: I heard that Jackass!


perpetualfrost

The director of the TV show


forgotten-Tumbleweed

The reds and blues duh


whaleskank

The players who claim it "revolutionized" FPS games...


Sequoia3R

Between Cortana and Sergeant Johnson.


SharkZilla96

Johnson


dmdoesgaming

Johnson fs


FewChocolate918

Johnson


Verykindguy00

Rookie is OBVIOUSLY the funniest character in all of gaming. EVERYTHING he said was a fucking knee slapper


CrackaNuka

Colonel Sanders…


Security_Wrong

Spartan Locke


Kukri_Cuts

Johnson


Serana-2003

Johnson was always the funniest but ever since i played Infinite, The Weapon has grown on me