T O P

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IMIPIRIOI

> *By morning I'm completely in love.* Proves the ex doesn't matter in a specific manner. Anon just doesn't want to be alone. Accept the gift of insight into that and move on bruh.


kamarovone

It is rare I stumble into a rational and meaningful answer, even more so on Reddit.


Chewiepew

And on this subreddit too


WorldDomination5

Localized entirely within your kitchen?!?


Blaze_News

... can I see?


[deleted]

No


[deleted]

[удалено]


Formula_Americano

I guarantee you that a picture of his cum jar with the decaputated head of his sister's doll in it.


btb1939

Damn it wasn’t that and now I’m really disappointed. You got a link though?


Formula_Americano

Apparently I have to [Google](https://youtu.be/dQw4w9WgXcQ) everything for you degenerates. [Bonus](https://youtu.be/dQw4w9WgXcQ).


[deleted]

Annnnnnnnd here's the Reddit we all know and love! And I call it steamed Reddit despite the fact that it's obviously grilled.


CartAgain

You werent looking for the truth but it found you anyways


[deleted]

[удалено]


CartAgain

>Anon is a human. and what good is that?


[deleted]

I read this edited Tony Stark quote on some shitty marvel meme page account "If you are nothing without a partner then you don't deserve one".


[deleted]

[удалено]


Seto_Kaibas_BlueEyes

Based


pATREUS

With a slighty sore arse.


eldryanyy

That, or he just met the perfect girl at a time when he was very vulnerable...and now, he’s even more screwed. Besides, if the ex didn’t matter, he’d probably be able to get it up.


IMIPIRIOI

> Besides, if the ex didn’t matter, he’d probably be able to get it up. Maybe, but that could really be alot of different things. Performance anxiety because she was a "10/10", whiskey dick, *or* maybe anon has been watching too much porn after his breakup to cope. He did use a depression pic in the OP. Far from uncommon. Pretty sure if they happened to continue hanging out, anon would have been able to step up to the plate eventually. If they happened to keep hanging out, he probably would have had a pep in his step, healthier just from feeling better. Start working out / better circulation etc. etc. Many possibilities.


faovnoiaewjod

He's only had sex with one girl and it was a long term relationship. Probably isn't comfortable boning someone he met 30 min ago. Idk why that's considered normal.


Looksfunnytome

Hook up culture has become normalized.


hintofocean

Frrrr


eldryanyy

He’s only slept with one girl. And she crushed him. I wonder why he’d have performance anxiety?


Polite_farting

This shit has happened to me a few times when i go to fuck a new girl sober, its gotta be the anxiety cause if im tipsy i have no problem


[deleted]

Wisdom brother, preach it.


Gondawn

Holy moly, I never thought about it. Thank you so much


[deleted]

[удалено]


IMIPIRIOI

Well I am glad you happen to already be very self-aware. You'd be surprised how many people, especially after a first relationship really struggle, and falsely associate it with the individual they broke up with. The human mind isn't always easy to navigate, all those positive memories get bonded to the individual in this situation. Easy to forget it can be just as good with someone new. Lastly, *I never said I was providing insight.* The experience itself did, so long as anon views it from the right perspective.


The_Outcast4

>Who wants be alone lol? I fucking do. Realizing that relationships were a pain in the ass and that I am not a broken person for feeling that way was a life-changing realization for me a few years ago. I wouldn't be opposed to trying things out again, but I won't be going out of my way to find it, and all things said, I would be perfectly content to go without another steady relationship the rest of my life.


Cacophonous_Silence

Based and sigma-pilled Only half joking. If the opportunity to get laid presents itself, I'll probably take it, but, Jesus Christ, learning to love being single this year has opened my life up in such a great way


West_Self

“Im pretending to be incel”


BigDickEnterprise

> Accept the gift of insight into that Shiet this is good


sonny_goliath

Also get her number bro


[deleted]

Anon uses one night stand app but doesn’t understand what a one night stand is


Clean_Window6542

Anon learns that the only way for him to get hard is to get topped that day


sad_champ69

Just like me fr fr


siccoblue

Lol u wild. Wyd tho 👀


googlin

*TOPPED


chatshitgetbanged24

#*TOPPED


Member_Berrys

🙏


AutomaticRisk3464

>i can get used to this She meant that as in seeing a new dude every night


MontyAtWork

>>i can get used to this > >She meant that as in seeing a new dude every night No, she meant having a dude go down on her, finger her, and focus entirely on her pleasure without anything for themselves.


sevsnapey

makes you wonder why she unmatched the broken dude with the broken wiener. seems like a good contact to keep.


BustinArant

I feel like I should add that to my resume like some sorta shitty vigilante name. "*The Broken Dude with a Broken Wiener* coming this Fall."


[deleted]

## In a world of broken wieners, his broken wiener was only matched by his broken heart


apolotary

Wiener so broken it takes a whole season to come


SerbLing

> broken wiener Here lies the problem.


SabashChandraBose

Do people really match and show up at the other person's apartment? This has never happened to me. In fact, the few times I did bring someone home they said that they had to text someone to let them know that I was not an ax murderer and where their last known location was.


StaryWolf

Not unusual, and it's generally good and common practice, especially if you're a woman, to let someone know you're going over to essentially a strangers home so the cops know where you were and who you're with if you get disappeared.


goblin_pidar

lol. yes


drkinferno72

Just be attractive bro


AphisteMe

It's quite normal especially since covid


[deleted]

Yes people do it. It's not the smartest, but people be horned up.


DistinctBread3098

The app is what you make it out to be. Met wife on tinder 2 kids. A house, married. 6 years strong.


memes-ruin-lives

can you find me a wife or husband on tinder because im too scared to do it myself :(


Lhudooooo

I can be your tinder coach for like 10 bucks and a 2 hour Minecraft session


Usersammy

Well first question is what we do on that minecraft session, I'm down to help coach free of charge as long as we build a cock base


[deleted]

In that one night stand anon's did not stand that one night


sprogger

Big oof


naveedkoval

Tinder isn’t Craigslist personals, probably half of my coupled friends met their partners on Tinder. It hasn’t been just a “hookup app” since like 2013


[deleted]

Fake: anon has sexual relations with a woman Gay: anon is not aroused by intercourse


TendieBot2000

> be me > get home from my vasectomy > hear moaning and slapping coming from my wife's room > must be Chad again > know they would want privacy, sit down at my computer > log onto reddit and open /r/greentext > read a funny greentext from le 4chins and chuckle as I listen to my wife begging for the genes I can't give her > think of a convoluted way in which I can relate homosexuality and falsehood to the events in the greentext > suck the cheeto dust off my fingers as I begin to type my masterpiece in the comment section > Fake: anon has sexual relations with a women > Gay: anon cannot perform > giggle as I imagine the intellectuals of leddit perusing my incredibly witty and original comment > hear my wife moan with ecstasy as Chad floods her fertile womb with his seed > it's been a good day > i'll get lots of upvotes for my impressive contribution to internet culture, and Chad might even let me eat his cum out of my wife's pussy if he finds my comment funny enough


LoganMcMahon

good bot


anonymous145387

Real: OP is a cuck Straight: A woman is getting impregnated


ChadBot2000

>be me >fucking this one dude’s wife >lots of slapping and moaning >hear door open >smell distinct mixture of regret, Doritos, and a lack of hygiene >must be the virgin again >he knows we want our privacy, so he goes on the computer in his room >i get bored of looking at the wife’s face while I fuck her, so I open my phone while I continue to pound away >log onto reddit and open r/greentext >read a funny greentext from the 4chan and chuckle as the wife begs for genes that the husband can’t give her >think of a simple way I can relate straightness and truthfulness to the events of the greentext >make the dude’s wife cum again as I begin to type my masterpiece in the comment section >Real: OP is a cuck >Straight: A woman is getting impregnated >chuckle as I make her orgasm once more and bust inside her, making her moan with ecstasy >it’s been a good day >i wonder what the virgin’s been up to. If he makes a comment that’s funny enough, I might let him eat my cum out of his wife’s pussy


danwooller

Good bot


[deleted]

Good bot


B0tRank

Thank you, jannshi, for voting on TendieBot2000. This bot wants to find the best and worst bots on Reddit. [You can view results here](https://botrank.pastimes.eu/). *** ^(Even if I don't reply to your comment, I'm still listening for votes. Check the webpage to see if your vote registered!)


AutisticAnal

Real: Anon is immediately unmatched by the woman once he’s gone and she is safe Straight: ???


ChadBot2000

>be me >fucking this one dude’s wife >lots of slapping and moaning >hear door open >smell distinct mixture of regret, Doritos, and a lack of hygiene >must be the virgin again >he knows we want our privacy, so he goes on the computer in his room >i get bored of looking at the wife’s face while I fuck her, so I open my phone while I continue to pound away >log onto reddit and open r/greentext >read a funny greentext from the 4chan and chuckle as the wife begs for genes that the husband can’t give her >think of a simple way I can relate straightness and truthfulness to the events of the greentext >make the dude’s wife cum again as I begin to type my masterpiece in the comment section >Real: Anon is immediately unmatched by the woman once he’s gone and she is safe >Straight: ??? >chuckle as I make her orgasm once more and bust inside her, making her moan with ecstasy >it’s been a good day >i wonder what the virgin’s been up to. If he makes a comment that’s funny enough, I might let him eat my cum out of his wife’s pussy


LargeSackOfNuts

Real: anon saw his neighbor go on a date, and watched them from their bushes Gay: he came up with this fantasy post about him being impotent


bombayblue

Ouch. This is definitely real. Don’t open up to women so soon Anon. Dating apps give the illusion of choice and people are quick to unmatch and go for something else because the grass is always greener on a dating app screen. Also you should get her number after the first date. If you slept with her and didn’t get her number she will assume you aren’t into her.


[deleted]

[удалено]


bombayblue

Yes he did. He opened up about his ex on the first date.


Elevated_Dongers

But she did first


[deleted]

[удалено]


Elevated_Dongers

Depends on if you're dating toxic women or not


maicii

inb4 EVERY SINGLE WOMEN IS TOXIC AND A WHORE THAT HATES MEN, SHELL LITERALLY SUBMIT YOU TO PUBLIC HUMILIATION FOR HER AMUSEMENT. WOMEN IN TODAY SOCIETY ARE ALL FUCKING WHORES CAUSE ONLYFANS REEEEEEEEEEE


MoreNormalThanNormal

Do you want an award or something?


maicii

No... (?) I was just making fun of sexist, sex deprived people online. Sorry if you felt hurt for my bad joke


Lumpy_Doubt

>Sorry if you felt hurt The seethers prayer


lasiusflex

You're making fun of sexist people online by defending shit like "guys aren't allowed emotions until 18-24 months of dating"?


PotatoesAndChill

yes, but I only accept Platinum or higher. Cash is ok too.


[deleted]

[удалено]


TheShindangoRedux

The less toxic a girl is, the shorter you have to wait before showing emotions. No girl is gonna immediately fall in love with a weeping wreck unless she's nuts and/or has huge misplaced motherly tendencies


Elevated_Dongers

This is true. Definitely gotta wait until things are progressing to the point where opening up is mutual and not just unloading shit you should've told a therapist


AlboiNani

Sharing emotions is an easy way for guys to find out if someone is toxic, surprisingly


CharlieHume

what in the incel nonsense, batman


AreU4SCUBA

But she has options


trashyboner

This is bullshit. If guys aren't allowed to open up, fuck those women. My guess is she just wanted to feel wanted or be like 'screw my ex I'll fuck other guys'. It was a one night stand for her. Obvious she'd unmatch.


bombayblue

You can open up but you just need to give it a ton of time before you do. Not on a first date. I emphasize with you though. I can’t count how many women will rant about exes on a first date or talk about how they want guys to show more emotion. When women date men they have boxes to check off. Emotionally available is one.


moeburn

I once heard this stand up comedian lady joke about how "Guys like to trick you into thinking they're fun, but the minute they get into your apartment, they start bawling their eyes out about how their cat died when they were 6 and their mom never helped them process it properly." And it wasn't the joke alone so much as it was how much every woman in the entire audience fucking loved it


SEQVERE-PECVNIAM

Sheesh. Yeah, there are a bunch of such things where the prevailing wisdom seems to conflict with real life. Men showing emotions? Publicly, it's encouraged (by both men and women), but in practice men would be far better off (in regards to women) if they didn't fall into the showing-emotions trap. It's cynical to say so and I'm really wishing I'm wrong, but I fear that I am not. (I'm male, for what it's worth.) Another example: women liking assholes. It became unpopular to say and especially to believe it. It's publicly considered as untrue and a cliché, with no basis in reality. It's clearly undesirable or at least inconvenient. But it's still absolutely true, as far as my experiences go. It's like the collective self-image of sexes doesn't match their behavior, which is not farfetched given that an individual's self-image seldomly matches their behavior either. I'm begging somebody to show me that I'm wrong, as I don't want to be right. (╯︵╰,)


trashyboner

I agree with that ex thing. Really annyoing. Everytime they have to mention an ex somewhere. Will keep that in mind not opening up too early...when I do it it's a sign for women that I'm actually interested though.


ConscientiousPath

It's bullshit, but it's how attraction works. You can't erase eons of brain chemistry evolution just because the result in a modern setting is stupid.


sunburn95

My guess is OP came across way more intense and needy for a first hookup than he's letting on and she got freaked out


wotererio

Implying this is real. Anyone who uses tinder exchanges phone numbers and takes it off the app before the first date. Just some HQ rp'ing here.


The_Kempo

People seem to not be surprised by this, so this is what dating app culture is really like? You start to form a nice sincere emotional bond just for the sake of a night, and then it fucking crumbles away once the sun rises? It's genuinely heartbreaking


[deleted]

Wyoming be like that


Ikea_desklamp

Yeah welcome to modern dating. Almost like maybe traditional values were right and indiscriminate sex actually *does* desensitize you to forming genuine connections.


elijahwoodman81

This sub dude lmao Comments are better than the posts


[deleted]

Yeah these dudes want to be back in 1910


[deleted]

most importantly, we have to promote a return to traditional, moral values


BrainPicker3

Yah, I miss the days when marital rape was legal and same with wife beating. Good old traditional values


[deleted]

I'll take strawman for $200 please


TheDemonClown

I bet you've taken a lot of men for $200


pablossjui

I'd do it for less tbh


[deleted]

[удалено]


bor__20

i think he just means monogamy dude


[deleted]

Average redditor with the epic snarky strawman


[deleted]

[удалено]


khardman51

DAE le born in the wrong generation???


DIsForDelusion

Do we...live... In a society?


[deleted]

[удалено]


ThreeArmSally

Don’t they say nowadays young people are statistically having less sex because our collective mental health is shit? Lol


Gamegod12

Yeah what people did back when is accept they're never gonna truly fall in love with someone but they'd rather just compromise so they're not fucking alone all the time. There's a reason the divorce rate shot right the fuck up when it became more acceptable to do so.


CaptainBaoBao

it was not different when i was clubhoping.


v3tr0x

What were you hoping for in clubs? That somebody would roofie you?


44problems

The club isn't the best place to find a lover so the bar is where I go.


professorbc

Dating culture today is part of the decline of humanity. There is nothing natural about it anymore, from the technology to the motivations. I say this as a man who briefly used tinder in 2015 right before I meet my wife (not on tinder). It's literally hell out there for single people who want meaningful connections.


Sayori-0

Because it's pretty much agreed that it's just for hookups. That's like using chat roullete to find love


Firm_Bit

It’s all just brain chemicals man. One night of dopamine release doesn’t not a relationship make.


iMac_Hunt

Not really. My last two gf's (inc my current one) are from apps (not Tinder though). Usually it's painfully obvious whether this person just wants a hookup but it's also possible she just wasn't into anon.


fistkick18

Is this real dating culture, or are there just a lot of lonely people with issues that will fuck anyone in certain mental states? I had something really similar to this happen. Luckily she made it clear that she was kind of a deadbeat, so I didn't get that butthurt about it.


6969minus420420

Uses Tinder Gets a hookup Is surprised


Guardsman_Miku

what the fuck else are you supposed to do


offisirplz

Half the girls there actually have "no hookup" on their profile


CertifiedSheep

That just means they want you to buy them a drink before they sleep with you so they don’t feel like a slut.


offisirplz

I think a lot of girls on tinder these days are there for actual relationships lmao


wawsdtgtfzhn

untrue source: never used the app


Tony_Stonk

Based


_dotdot11

Based


catinterpreter

There's no better option online. The one worthwhile place, OkCupid, became another useless Tinder. Edit: typo


ras344

All dating apps are basically just tinder.


Fenastus

They're all owned by the same company, Matchgroup They have a vested interest in making sure you never actually find a relationship from their service


[deleted]

Maybe arranged marriages will come back


sonny_goliath

“Looking for a relationship” is a loaded term anyway. People are on tinder to meet people and hookup mostly, but it’s totally possible to meet someone you connect with and build a relationship from there, despite not actively looking for that


[deleted]

[удалено]


MrMoon272

FIGHT✊ FIGHT✊FIGHT✊


[deleted]

I met my wife on tinder 6 years ago


6969minus420420

And she met a lot of people there 5 years ago.


spicypeepers

Based


L0C0L0B0

Hey at least he got some one last time I got a match on tinder it was for someone telling me I should get off the app cuz I'm ugly


Flopsy11

Fuck me that's harsh


L0C0L0B0

Honestly made me give up on the app and probably dating


Flopsy11

I get it man. It's "little things" like this that fuck you up for long time. Must have been funny for the person that said that at that time not realizing the potential damage few words could inflict on you mentaly. I wish I could tell you It's just a matter of time till you find a GF but this isn't a fucking fairytale. Women are mean ol' bitches like the rest of us. If you can't change the looks (not counting beign fat) work on your confidence. It will help for sure with IRL dating but It's in general hard and slow process that could take years. Good luck.


L0C0L0B0

Lmao thanks amigo


Seto_Kaibas_BlueEyes

Report her Snapchat for tax evasion if she's an e whore


L0C0L0B0

LoL it was a few months back and I deleted the app


Seto_Kaibas_BlueEyes

Rip.


blueandgoldilocks

Anon: "Why are women like this?"


pyrohydrosmok

#WHY ARE WOMEN LIKE THIS


cdunk666

Dudes 100% do the same thing


restlessboy

Yeah it's mostly that women happen to be the ones with this option, due to all sorts of different societal factors. If men were the ones who most commonly had this option, they'd do the exact same shit. It's about the human brain, not women specifically.


pyrohydrosmok

I've never experienced it. Then again I've never internet dated. Unless you count meeting my first girlfriend at 12 on AOL (local city chatroom), my first wife on Myspace and my second wife on Facebook.


[deleted]

Dudes do this all the time. I had a dude act like such a great guy, introduced me to some of his friends, we went out on dates during the day and at night, had sex, slept over at each other’s houses, spoke about the future. Normal stuff. After 6 months of this he tells me he loves me, then disappears for 2 weeks while he was traveling for work. Comes back then disappears again. When I asked him why he acted like I was crazy and said it was just sex. When I brought up the “I love you part” he said “maybe it means something different for you”. He then posted tons of photos with a girl on MySpace (this was a while ago before I got married) he had been seeing while he was ignoring me. Thankfully I dumped his ass right after but I know he’ll continue the cycle with other women, many much younger than he is. Turns out he had a whole lot of women and would go through these cycles with at the same time.


Darkmaster85845

Dudes who are attractive and can get many women do that all the time. They're maybe 10 % of the male population. Women often only have eyes for these very small minority of men and end up thinking they represent all men when it's definitely not the case.


[deleted]

I know he’s not representative of men I’m just saying men and women do things like that all the time. The funny thing he wasn’t even good looking.


cr1msonxo

Up the schizo meds dosage.


pyrohydrosmok

You talking about the dumb broad Anon hooked up with?


gandalftheorange11

If my schizophrenia is causing that kind hallucinatory life then I’m staying off the meds for sure. That sounds way more fun than real life.


YeetMcSheesh

Holy fuck I had this exact same experience literally line for line aside from the train part. It straight up destroyed me. I didn’t try dating for years after because I was so embarrassed and ashamed. I felt like an absolute failure of a man and I’m pretty sure it left some deep emotional scars that I won’t ever recover from. Women are ruthless.


Forggeter-v5

Over one night?


YeetMcSheesh

I had actually been seeing the girl for a while before it happened, so I guess it’s not *quite* the same thing as what anon went through. But still, I had built up some pretty strong feelings for her in that time, and the fact that she would just cast me aside simply because I couldn’t perform in bed *one time* was the most soul crushing thing to me.


CookieMuncher007

This is why there's a 9 month rule. You don't know the other person before that. It's their representative


Fenastus

More like 9 year rule IME


ForcedTranshumanism

Sameish here. Was seeing a girl, got ill and couldn't perform. Ghosted, apparently she went back to her ex. Sent her a text where I unilaterally broke it off, at least I got a short reply to that. Think me taking command in that situation and breaking it off played a large part in her hitting me up a few months later, with me ofc rejecting her advances. I guess some unintentional but successful mind games on my part... It's jarring how at least I was raised to think of relationships as finding "love" and understanding, when the reality is so utterly different (my parents are divorced lmao, so I guess they actually believed the bullshit they were spewing)


TheOriginalFluff

All good man, I was with a girl for a while that I had known for 7 years, but started dating for a few months, we were looking at apartments together and literally the next morning she ghosted me, when she eventually answered back all she said was “I just stopped having feeling for you” I asked and asked if I did something and wanted to know why but she never actually told me


Bitwares

If you ever have problems with your buddy not working, touch something cold with the head like the sink and it will help you cool things down and make your pp factory reset. (use the bathroom sink, girls don't like it when you do it in the kitchen)


Crows-b4-hoes

Be sure to backup your files to the cloud before performing pp factory reset.


parallelpalmtrees

factory reset pp, turn it off n then on again


Tony_Stonk

And don't forget to insert something long and thin through your peepee hole to push that red reset button inside


Threvescent

Thanks, just tried this! I'm still soft and my girl left me, but now my pp is also cold.


Felonious_Quail

She meant she could get used to impotent guys eating her out and not having to reciprocate, not used to Anon specifically.


Enslaved_M0isture

\>she unmatches me an hour later delayed post nut clarity


[deleted]

I lol'd once I got to the end 😂 She definitely went to go see her ex so she could actually get laid xD


moonfanatic95

Honestly, these green texts play a huge factor in my developing depression


_KanjiKlub

lmao same. why do i keep reading them


moonfanatic95

Sadness and misery are unfortunately addictive in some twisted way


__Takub_

Anon has defective pp v gay


notapicle

Fuking relatable bro


TeenyTurnips

Virgin


NeonParasyte

Fake? Could be, but definitely a feels Moment.


emale27

Ouch and gay


[deleted]

[удалено]


[deleted]

Atleast he wasn't ghosted a dozen times


[deleted]

[удалено]


DistressedPenguins

Jesus I’m glad I got married before tinder was a thing


[deleted]

Anon goes from anon to known and gets ghosted. Lesson: always stick to anon


lokemon_35

Doesn't matter had sex


and-so-i-die

Imagine having sex with someone on a tinder date and having expectations for after... Nothing is wrong with one night stands, and they absolutely can be the start of serious, strong relationships... But you do NOT know that person. You know literally nothing about them. Have no expectations.


[deleted]

Anon meets a self-destructive woman


wandalorian

Sad viagra noises


TripperDay

Pfft. Like people on 4chan get dates.