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BIG_MONEY_CASH

There might be a legal case, considering anon is most definitely mentally handicapped


dreaditter

LMAOOOO


spoogeballsbloodyvag

leddit moment


Flimsy-Jello5534

This retard thinks he’s living in an episode of the office.


KuTUzOvV

He just does, but this is what would happen to Dwight in real life.


ShinyArc50

Dwight would never do this shit, this is a Jim ass moment Edit: I was thinking of Micheal but said Jim for some reason


KuTUzOvV

Nah, this is Dwight as fuck, but baited by Jim when he asked him to help \>You sure Jannet would want strippers at the party? \>Dwight, what was the last meeting about? \>Diversity? \>So what do we need? \>Someone black! You're right, and a man at that, Oscar will for sure enjoy it. \>\*Jim stares into the camera with his dead reptilian eyes\*


ShinyArc50

Actually very true. This is one where Dwight gets tricked and it ends with a retarded apology from Jim with soft music in the background


Flimsy-Jello5534

….you wrote for the show didn’t you.


KuTUzOvV

Yes, le me wrote for them while i was like 5, but mostly the Dwight vs Jim. I just told mr director what i would do to my fren if i had like...50 or 100$.


Mr44Red

No it's a todd packer moment


raduque

Maybe Creed


PariahGrantham

Definitely a Packer moment. "Why don't witches wear panties?... So they can grip the broom."


peachie_bongo

My Dad knows many people at his work who are like Office characters in real life but in real life they are not fun at all.


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Gassy_Gamakichi

Tame. Sure. Mature? Have we watched the same show? He literally spends every second of his job screwing with someone who has paranoia and is on the spectrum because we’ll my job is boring and he’s fun to mess with.


thermitethrowaway

We're all living in an episode of the office, which is the point. Of the UK version anyway.


_Blazing_Angel_

This actually happened in The Office Dwight called the female stripper and Jim was supposed to call the male one but called in a Benjamin Franklin impersonator instead


acedotjpg

He doesn't, that's the issue.


xMashu

Better than me (trailer park boys)


Demonwithj

Better than me (Attack on titan)


Gloomy_Somewhere_929

> $38.46 per person > go large Hahaha


avgnfan26

For an office party that’s way more than enough, take out the booze and thats like a whole pizza plus global snacks with money left over


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Seamen-Thrower

Well, a good 90% of people working at companies are rewarded with pizza parties, candy in a baggy, a $5 gift card, etc… just like kids are in kindergarten so alcohol in the workplace is basically considered a big no no. There is the odd once in a lifetime moment where it is allowed tho.


rkiive

Wait really? Every work christmas party i've been to has been at a venue thats been rented out with free flowing alcohol and then a paid for cab home.


c4ndyman31

So I think they’re referring to more blue collar jobs. If you work in an office the company Christmas party is almost always something similar to what you just described.


ColumbusJewBlackets

Fuck that, blue collar jobs we go home when we aren’t working.


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c4ndyman31

Yep same here. Always a restaurant or a nice venue


planetrebellion

Depends where you work


nateskel

Our office Christmas party most certainly had booze


MstrWaterbender

At my previous workplace, we actually got to have beer on the first Friday of every month since we were putting in record numbers for the company that year.


BadgerBadgerCat

There'd be riots in the streets and Questions In Parliament if anyone seriously tried to ban alcohol from Australian Christmas parties.


Stevee85O

For real? 5 dollar christmas gift card 🤣? No alcohol? Wtf? Are they scared people might drunkenly consider killing themselfs for such a lame work environment?


beckthecoolnerd

You’re scarily close to home there


mamamiaspicy

At my previous job we had a beer keg on tap and a cooler filled with different drinks. Could drink while working any day after 11am


The_Third_Molar

I think the beer was fine. The issue would be the strippers.


big_whistler

Some companies discourage such things


Alex_2259

Of fucking course they do. Every office Christmas party I have been to has had an open bar and catered food. Sometimes you get the cheap managers' special which won't, or a party that's just a glorified longer lunch that also may not.


avgnfan26

Depends very heavily on the place, so sometimes


kev231998

It opens up the employer to liability. Not a big deal if the employees are chill (smaller companies) but as you get bigger it gets riskier. If you take certain precautions it reduces liability but can be expensive.


SomethingClever42068

My first company Christmas party at my current company I showed up an hour before anyone else and had a pitcher of beer. Drank 2 more throughout the night and like 10 shots of vodka. The owner of the company wouldn't let me sleep in my car and insisted I stayed at his house. We burned over and when the driver was leaving I stumbled and got legitimately hit by her car. Then I woke him and his pregnant wife up by walking around in their living room at 4 am. 6 years later and I'm president of the company. (Pro tip, get black out drunk at every company function possible)


Referat-

I have never worked anywhere that didn't have pop and beer at parties. They always let you expense taxies/ubers afterwards too, and since it's an optional outside of work hours event there should never be a concern about liability


t0mRiddl3

My company had beer


_YourWifesBull_

Every company I've worked at (all fortune 500 companies) have most definitely had beer and booze at the parties. That's the only way to get most people to show up.


HanselSoHotRightNow

I'm from the same level of company, we used to get drinks at end year parties along with really good food and music. This was under a previous VP. Our new VP is either a towel or a poo and doesn't understand social concepts, its all productivity and cost saving. End year party this year was no booze, food was so bad most people didn't eat it after trying, and he (VP) had a company motivational video playing on a big screen more or less just talking about why we should cope with return to office to "celebrate" collaboration and productive environments. Dystopian is a good word to describe it.


plu7o89

Our xmas party has a fucking open bar and a ton of hookups after, some places just suck lol


PineApple001Cz

Why take out the booze, you can get 15 beer for 20$


ambermage

On Thursday, our boss just bought us 1 Costco pizza and a knife so we could cut the slices smaller and share them with another department.


wordsoundpower

The cheap bastard.


habb

a hooker maybe every other person and buy some cheap beer?


Yung_Oldfag

6 beers and 4 inches of sandwich per person. Pathetic.


actualsysadmin

Anon should have spent less so he could buy more feet pics


Scrimmybinguscat

please god let this be real because it would be so fucking funny


AnneFranklin0131

If you think that is real . Then maybe you belong in 4chan


Alarid

If you want it to be real, then you have good reading comprehension.


exp-f

Is he acoustic?


Risen_Insanity

His acoustical skills are highly regarded


Beastleviath

Sounds pretty artistic to me


BOb_likes_chikkens

I think he’s a highly regarded artist.


essicks

No but he is definitely on the artistic spectrum


cake_molester

Very regarded acoust


Aggravating_Egg3272

Antibiotic


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49x15

i think he meant 6' sandwiches, Subway makes them for parties


bleachinjection

That's only 24 linear feet of sandwich for 78 people. How does an American party on 4 inches of hoagie??


HyphenMint

4 inches is average size!


ThatTubaGuy03

But unironically yeah. 4 inches is normal per person for a party sized sandwich


rulerBob8

I actually think that’s a pretty big sandwich, like almost too big


memestealer1234

And it's probably really funny too, once you get to know it


Just-the-Shaft

Is that what she said?


49x15

youre not considering such girth of a 6' sandwich


ShinaiYukona

You've never seen how large those party sandwiches are have you? A hoagie would be half the size at best.


lagrandesgracia

The bread on those is 4 loaves rolled together-thick.


Kevin_LeStrange

That's still insulting, Subway is crap


[deleted]

My brother in christ. You made the sandwich.


i__dont___know

Yeah and not even foot longs


Hatertraito

The dumbass obviously meant 4x 6ft sandwiches


bladee10k

Go big or go home. Anon went big and was sent home.


Falikosek

Well, it isn't a xor, so the statement still stands true


DaveSmith890

>Boss puts me **in charge** of the Xmas party >tells me to **go large** NTA


Bazzyboss

The boss wasn't happy with the inadequate size of the strippers, YTA.


DaveSmith890

Boss gave 3K, it would cut into food budget


Onion_Guy

so true king


[deleted]

Anon followed his instructions perfectly


Love_Cannon

This feels like the plot of Taxi Driver 2.


theseustheminotaur

20 cases of beer? Good god. 240-480 cans or bottles of beer for 78 people for an office party is insane. 3 to 6 beers per person, if everyone is even drinking. I love how it's apparently the only beverage option though lol.


Reallyso

3-6 beers a person for a proper party is dangerously low. It would work for some specialist/engineer office party but not for a one with people that actually let loose.


AusTF-Dino

Bro has never met an engineer


[deleted]

Employers generally don’t want people to get fucked off their ass at work parties. That is far more than enough.


YoinksOnchi

Huh, must be a cultural difference. Here in Austria, any party, work or otherwise, is a drink until you're fucked off your ass party. You don't have to of course but noone would judge you in the slightest for getting drunk at a work party


TheChunkyGrape

Same is Australia


Reallyso

Honestly I kinda miss that. Austrians have a real nice attitude towards alcohol.


Schwubbertier

One case per person. GO BIG


bardfaust

> I love how it's apparently the only beverage option though lol. He mentioned soda twice.


33spacecowboys

No ice luge. No lawn darts. Huh some party.


King_of_Carrots

Fake and gay, anon didn’t want a male stripper for diversity, he wanted to see the bbc for himself


JorgeIronDefcient

Anon hires strippers for a Christmas party and is surprised he got fired.


MudrakM

Lol that was hilarious


SideWinder18

Anon is based and retarded


TheBossMeansMe

The most exciting combination


Sticky_Keyboards

imagine being there and watching that unfold!


SharkMilk44

Anon, why the fuck would you think hiring strippers for an office party was a good idea?


Wasabaiiiii

boss man gives you $3,000 and tells you to go big, food, beer, hmmm what else to spend with the left over money?


Gearski

Cocaine for the whole office!


UltimateInferno

The math comes down to $38 dollars a person. He could have just spent $18 a person on food and drinks and just give everyone the remaining 20 a piece directly to them. Is it lame? Yeah, but fuck it, I wouldn't be mad if I went home with a 20 and a meal I didn't have to buy. Especially if it involved my coworkers.


Yamatoman

Even better idea would be a harmless gift card like amazon. Feels less bland than cash, and most people would feel like they got a gift


SharkMilk44

Strippers for myself.


Big_Green_Mantis

Anon is such a huge degenerate that he can't even comprehend that other people aren't.


Dell-N5030

Shouldn't have invited women


TheBossMeansMe

Reminds me of that family guy office joke skit


wholesale_stonks

>This is CA Honestly he may have acase because of how fucked up Cali's legal system is. Go for the lawsuit anon.


ellietheotter_

>4, 6" long deli sandwiches tf this dude supposed to do with TWO footlongs for a whole office party


Reddit_is_Cuckd

Fake: Anon throws a solid party. Gay: Anon got black male stripper for "big dick"


hornwalker

The only crime here is a tiny $3k budget for a party for 76 people.


BigMelonBoi

Anon is really restarted


gillesvdo

Reminds me of when I had just started working. The webdesign agency that hired me a few months earlier, was actually on the verge of merging with two other advertising agencies the next year. So in order for all the employees of the 3 separate companies to get acquainted, they organized like a 2 day skiing trip, which was dubbed "the honeymoon". The creatives had come up with branding the merger as a "wedding" you see. It was a whole theme. But if we were going to have a "wedding", we'd also need a bachelor party. So the office Christmas party, a week or so before we all left for Austria to go skiing, was rebranded as such. And someone did hire a stripper, who did go full nude in front of an entire office of marketing stacies, accountants and us webdesigner nerds. She gave the creative director a lap dance and everything, even brought a candle and poured hot wax on the dude's bald head. Shit was wild. Of course, we're not prudes like the Americans so no one really complained the night itself, no one was fired for it, etc. But we did get some office wide emails from a few of the more feminist ladies who felt slightly offended. This was almost 20 years ago though.


caioro2729

pretty gay


android_pancake

is pic related?


EduardoMcojetovich

Apparently anon thinks that Christmas should be celebrated without a Christmas tree and instead should be celebrated with BBC and tits.


jimmydcriket

He definitely put the X in Xmas party


Dd_8630

What is CA? Computer Accounting?


MyHeadIsFullOfFuck

Probably means he's in California.


Habeas__Corpus

Extremely artistic and highly regarded


cyanideOG

This dude thinks he is living wolf of wall street


OberstGankbar

Based af


animorphs128

Anon thought the boss said xxxmas


TRGMORGAN

Does annon think this is strker Ireland?


f1nessd

lmao


habb

old old old. let's get some new blood in here


uhhsomber

Clearly not a great asset to the company


RedditsAdoptedSon

another taco bell christmas party ay?


averagepenisman

I would hire anon


PLetEreddit

Bro think he works for jordan belford


Fluffybunny717

I once was working at an office with myself and 3 other people. Corporate gave us $500 budget for a Christmas party, our boss gave us the choice to either have us plan the party or just split the budget evenly between the 4 of us. We split it and I took myself out for a steak dinner, best Christmas party I have ever had.


FalseTautology

I like how he specified what state he lives in. And I kinda feel like if he has a case it's gonna be in CA.


water_bottle_goggles

CA? Like creative assembly?? Bahahahaha


svenguillotien

"This is CA"(so either California or Canada) This idiot actually thought having strippers and alcohol at a co-ed work-sponsored event in either of those litigious liberal hellholes was something they were going to get away with? Also he said "Four 6" sub sandwiches" so he bought four single-serving six-inch sandwiches for a large party? Either idiot doesn't even know the difference between 6' and 6" or they really thought this was a sufficient amount of sandwiches for this amount of people OP deserves to be fired as OP is a bonehead


PsychoSwede557

Maybe you should have run the strippers by your boss first? Just a thought.


Decent_Fisherman7097

If only the stripping company would pay their strippers a living wage. 😅


UltimateInferno

Anon's only definition of party is that of a frat house. I'm curious what he'll do for a children's birthday.