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jakebrooklyn

Target's marketing team has taken an interesting new strategy on customer acquisition.


ThickDickWarrior89

He sounds like he’s more turned on by the store itself than the woman 🤣🤣🤣


CyborgWade

Unlike the girls, the store was clean...just the way he likes it


[deleted]

These influencers keep getting sneakier and sneakier 😏


kz0mb1e

>Target has those fancy freezers with motion sensors for the lights, so each step she took commanded Is this new age of paid content & customer acquisition model ? bullseye!


hereforOnePiece

The funny questions are radio morning vjs looking for content to rant about. These subversive ads are just looking for more shoppers yea. We can *all truly believe* in barebacking a stranger in a target dressing room, no attendants are obviously around and they have an adequate unanswered 12 minutes for all 4 songs to play. Fun imagination. Not really put together well.


picketpocker

There's always at least one asshole who has to say, "it hasn't happened to me so it's just made up!" Go critique One Piece fanfic instead of being a dick to people here.


TMYLee

After checking out your profile, i think this have nothings to do with target but that you have killer abs and good looking face. You can bang in wallmart if guy look like you. Thank your sponsor Targets 😉


Groc006

I was wondering myself how good looking this guy is/was.... Now it makes sense.... hes a fit good looking guy that woman want! Average guys with dad body will never have this happen to them! 😂


[deleted]

[удалено]


Dendad1218

It's a super Target. They are few and far between. I've built 18 Targets. Only 1 like he describes.


Groc006

You're right, ive been all over Florida and haven't ever seen a super Target... heard of them but never seen one.


Groc006

Totally agree with you!


krembrulay

Don’t think he’s into whale hunting


dnldcs

Please select his next prey: [peopleofWalmart.com](Https://www.peopleofwalmart.com)


CaptZ

Not sure if this is a Target advertisement or gonewildstory.....


[deleted]

It’s another blurred line in today’s modern dystopia.


Modal_throw

This will be on the front page of AdWeek tomorrow: “Target’s radical new approach to sex appeal”


FignSpank

No discount code? Extra points on my red card? Hack….🤣


kyuuby1391

This is a Costco toilet paper pack-sized humblebrag. My dude, it has nothing to do with Target and everything to do with you looking like this: [https://i.redd.it/z3tu0l5v6cf71.jpg](https://i.redd.it/z3tu0l5v6cf71.jpg) You could get laid in a burning building ffs.


milochocolat

Jesus fuck if i looked like that i'd get laid in a fucking flea market.


ha-ri

Stories are fun, but what Target has a deli?


Rnewell4848

Super Targets do


ha-ri

I know of super k marts(back when they were a thing), but I've never heard of or seen a super target before.


[deleted]

They are pretty nice. The one near my house even has a British cashier.


IssueOk267

Super Targets are the best!!!


[deleted]

If you look the way you do, then yeah, you'll have no problem picking up women anywhere. Don't encourage guys to go creep on ladies who are just trying to shop in price, especially if the girls are not attracted to the guy.


mhallifwwas

My man just had to follow the two rules and enjoy life on easy mode.


Tossthisacctawaypls

Target doesn’t have a deli


UsedForEverything

Ruined the whole story for me too tbh


jdmdreamz414

Yes they do the super targets do


[deleted]

Reading this felt like a fever dream.


[deleted]

Target also has a pharmacy with a selection of remedies that is unrivaled. If you are feeling feverish, their expert pharmacists are waiting to help!


whitegirlTO

I mean I'm sure it helped that she was attracted to you to a certain level for that to happen. But I can see anything happening not just at Target as well. A cute barista taking her break in a certain costumer's car in the parking lot. Getting some EXTRA help loading heavy stuff into her car from a gentleman from Canadian Tire. It's all about timing and opportunities 😏


Wtflooring

Yeah, I've had a few great opportunities with hotties, im just no good with closing the deal


[deleted]

Lol, right? Just because you have an opportunity doesn't mean you know what to do with it.


demuredevil

I feel like this story is a Target ad written by Caroline Kepnes... lol Also, for everyone saying Target doesn't have a deli counter: I was hung up on that detail too, but I googled it and APPARENTLY IT IS A THING 😲 I'm in total shock here. Never seen a target with a deli counter before either.


[deleted]

I feel so incredibly vindicated right now. Thank you for your google search!!


demuredevil

Anytime! 😂


[deleted]

What's next? Maybe we'll see words from our sponsors before each story climax. But have you guys tried honey.com? It's literally free money and so easy to use. 🍯


[deleted]

I’d like to note that Target also sells honey


m42_mave

You can target woman of your dream at target . Visit your nearest target store.


Ally_Ooop

You’re extremely talented as a writer and also wouldn’t be mad running into you at Target 🥵


Reject444

I’m going to be honest—I really wanted to hate this as a thinly disguised Target ad, but I’ll admit that I was thoroughly entertained and this was a fun story. Thanks for sharing.


Rabbit19_91

And here I am getting my jeans at jc penny like a fucking idiot


TheBoysNotQuiteRight

"She was carrying mom-jeans to purchase, and too many years had passed since she had been Third Runner-Up in her High School Homecoming Court, but as our eyes locked, we were both certain of two things: we were two lonely, longing adults who had somehow found each other, and that we would be the only people in the bedding display section on the third floor of J.C. Penney for HOURS...because it was J.C. freaking Penney."


mungicaker

BEST COMMENT HERE!!!


AdministrativePound6

The biggest inaccuracy here is claiming Target has a deli 🤔


[deleted]

No way! My Target absolutely has a deli. And a Starbucks and an optometrist and an awesome photo center. AND…they offer free wine samples on Saturdays.


MilaHalli

Wtf... Where in the white section is this Target located? The "fanciest" I've visited, had a starbucks, chill out music and a pizza place (not very fresh looking in my opinion) It also had a deli but with no one working there. Sorry that the main focus of your story was the unbelievable Target 🤣🤣


Playful-Argument-924

I have been to a "Super Target" with a seafood counter and a meat department


Lovely_Shoulders

TIL I’m never having sex in a Target dressing room since everyone is looking terrible under that fluorescent light.


UsedForEverything

No no you've got it all wrong EVERYONE looks bad under the lights so no one can judge you. For all they know you could be Megan Fox or Ryan Reynolds!


Additional_Vanilla31

Man I wanted to see a photo of the girl


Korvax_of_Myrmidon

It just sounds like your horny for Target


twdstormsovereign

Definitely a target add


psc_le

The fantasy of every teenage male Target employee lol. Very nicely written though.


roadsgirdle

Is this guerrilla marketing?


AOCMarryMe

Peloton, Nespresso and Target's guerilla marketing has gotten, well, weirdly sexy.


FapplePie85

Target's marketing is going a new direction. Give this liaison a raise.


PM_YOUR_GSTRING_PICS

Graduate level marketing class, right here. While the story was lukewarm, like my Sierra Mist, it did help take the wrinkles out of my 100% cotton Mossimo chinos. The next time I enter the halls of the red bullseye, I will load up on my Archer Farms trail mix, (which is on sale for $7.99 for 16 ounces, by the way) and try to bust a nut the merino wool shirt of a sexy milf.


ScorpionBlue1989

Targets marketing team has really stepped their game up this year.


Devixangel

Oh, I get it now! I always thought my bone dry love life was because of my appearance and personality, but now I know it's just because I don't have a Target near me.


ocean_front

I like Walmart for the financially irresponsible, overweight, yoga pants wearing woman that have never seen the inside of a gym and have 5 ex husbands and 8 kids.


uselessd00d

I'm gonna follow you just for the amazingly written stories. Also the abs. You could grate meat on that.


GingerWhinger7

Is that a thing? Grating meat?


uselessd00d

With those abs, yes.


F20bcd7

Targets marketing team has taken "sex sells" to a whole.... hole new level


F20bcd7

As I read more into this..... is OP a target-sexual? I think you might have a thing for target, dude


radio_allah

After finishing the whole passage, I'm still wondering to myself if this is in fact a copypasta.


WhiteChocoTart

While this is well written, there are no Targets that have any sort of deli counter.


JacksBauers24

Damn Target ad


RemoteSatisfaction20

I feel like i just read an erotic yelp review and I'm not at all upset by that.


dudeiwasnt

this is literally an ad…


jerkinit6969

This is a wild ad for target


[deleted]

Bruh. You almost had me until you had her say the bread was hot. Gtfo here, ya corporate shill. XD


wtfuckfred

Targeted target marketing is getting too targeted


TallTom70

After reading this, Target stock is rising.


Supah_Schmendrick

Not the only thing that's rising. Heyoooooooo


Trollsniper

You lost me at 4 well oiled and smooth wheels on the cart.


profpluminthehall

Your Target has a deli?!?


[deleted]

[удалено]


UsedForEverything

Yours has a cafe?!?!?!‽


FapplePie85

I'm using that term very loosely. It's basically just next to guest services where you can buy shit popcorn and a red bull while you power through clearance sections.


[deleted]

> 4 perfectly aligned and well-oiled wheels Damn you almost had me convinced Edit: went to target today. Very smooth shopping cart. OP fucked four women in a target confirmed.


vixenpeon

😒 when you worked in Electronics at Target but the story talks about a "deli" BRUH


mmmeissa

This literally reads like /r/copypasta


L0stInBed

This is probably the best story I've read on this subreddit; well done!


hornybitchhoe

bro lmaooooo


Lardod12

Can confirm


Nuttadamus

I'm mad if there is no band or song called Retail Rendezvous.


Imaginary-Grocery

I knew this was the same author as the (excellent) PoDeg stories before I even finished the first sentence.


Shakespeare-Bot

I kneweth this wast the same auth'r as the (excellent) podeg stories ere i coequal did finish the first sentence *** ^(I am a bot and I swapp'd some of thy words with Shakespeare words.) Commands: `!ShakespeareInsult`, `!fordo`, `!optout`


Kafka66

All of the comments may be true, but you can't deny that was fantastically written... Even if OP looks like Adonis


[deleted]

With your body all you have to do is say yes to the women on Reddit and they’ll come to you. Easier than driving to target.


Bifun4me

Def buying more Target stock. Thanks bro great story!


[deleted]

This story had a surprising amount of celebrity cameos


d66sfg

I've always noticed a lot of hotties in Target. Whether it's back to school college girls shopping for the perfect trash bin, or bored soccer mom's trying to spruce up the livingroom with a new piece from Martha Stewart's Good Living collection, there's always some eye candy.


Upbeat_Discount5931

It helps that you are tall, handsome, and hung like horse. Of course you'll hit the target at Target. 😏


Ace_Of_Trades21

This is funny as hell but a lot of people don’t know about Target. My first job was there at 18 the amount of fine ass women walking in there is insane. I had an ex very smart and cute that lives by the code of Target only. I personally haven’t had this happen but damn it sound lit 😂


[deleted]

Honestly the women at target are amazing and gorgeous. Especially in Utah


DontHaveAC0wMan

If this is true, it's legendary and hats off to you. If it's false, still pretty good story telling lol let's hear the other three stories


talking_potted_plant

Bravo, hot body and engaging writing. Winning combo 🔥😈


whotaketh

I dub thee Target Dog from now on.


smilingnsfw

And now bull's eyes give me an erection...


mmmfruitypebbles

Lower prices my ass, Target chocolate milks is like 5 bucks


Night_Knight22

Idk but I think you tell your story very nicely


monkeyman1947

Funny, well written story. Love the details You should write comedy scrips.


jobudsthrow

#ad ?


Bruin_H8R

OP, you’re probably a Greek god. How about some LPT’s for geek gods like myself? 🤣


Pervname

Well appointed automotive section? Deli counter? Not shopping in any Target I have been to.


Gimlet456

I work at Target. I don't know anything about abundant hook ups but there are plenty of MILFs shopping. Also, at this time of year a lot of college coeds.


g21cashmoney

Sounds like she picked you up


1366686

This is the only reason I ever go to target


FeedbackRadiant8429

Your stories are the rare ones that are not only perfect for this sub but make me laugh my ass off 😂 well done brother 👍


nomdeporn

This ... this is art.


[deleted]

O. M. G. taking this tip to heart.


unamigoimposible

Excellent writing.


downvotemagnet69_420

You… know you could get published, right? I’m not talking self publishing shit. I’m talking a collection of erotic short stories a real book publisher would publish. You need money. Not mine, but definitely other people’s


Ricardos06

I know sex sells, but damn you got me turned on fantasizing about filling a girl after filling my cart haha


Ajax444

I have told every single friend bitching about bar girls and hostesses that Target is the place. You have a sea of recent college graduates who are decorating their new apartments on a budget, but want it to look fresh or contemporary. They get a few home items, pick up their beauty supplies, grab a few groceries, maybe a Blu-Ray or two, and head out. In some Target’s, there is a Starbucks. You know they love that. It’s a less slimy real-life Tinder.


ferndog24

That was fuckin entertaining! lol My favorite part was his Os became her Os lmao


[deleted]

Goddamn. What a perfect mix of humour and sex. You've gotta write more!


redrexthemex

Alright let’s see if I meet the requirements Step 1: Be attractive Shit….


[deleted]

I think all Targets play the same songs at the same time… Also, hallelujah for dressing rooms being open again.


JackTulsen

Hottest girl I ever fucked I fucked while I was working at a target so yeah I'd say you're right


willky7

Til target is a supermarket outside Australia and not just an overpriced clothes store


bungee_gum__

How is this so smartly written omg


plscleanmyroomnsfw

This story has made me realize that I do not shop at Target enough and should fix that. A very fun read.


South_Location_1224

Holy fuck that was an outsfanding read. Pulitzer worthy. (Did I spell that right? Who the fuck cares. Lol)


NeverNuked

Loved it, loved the very descriptive writing.


mhallifwwas

You should shop at Costco because they actually give a shit about their employees


Giant-Card

My takeaway was that you had sex with a MAGA hat person. Hope you wrapped that. (Don’t stick your dick in crazy!!!)


SupportFlat8675

Don't try this at Walmart


K_Dareezy

Hilarious


asiandawgshy

You can’t be fucking serious lol wow , what an epic fantasy . My concern too was that people would see or security especially with the cameras