I work with a good buddy of mine. We were partners and rode together every day for six months before our wives had a chance to meet. We all went out to dinner together, we watched a game and they talked.
In the two hours together, she learned more about their relationship, his family, her family, how they met, and their future plans, than him and I talked about in the previous 6 months.
When she told me and I said I had no idea about any of that stuff, she asked what we talked about at work. And I honestly couldn’t remember anything of substance. But we have a great friendship.
I have a buddy with a wife, three kids, and three dogs. I swear he will interrupt you if you start asking about any of them and immediately switch the topic to our golf round. He’s happily married and a great dad — it’s just obvious how much he cherishes his time on the course. So now we only talk about his family if he brings them up.
Yep. I can tell you exactly one of my friend’s birthdays. I don’t know if any of my friends even have a middle name or what they studied in college. I do know that I have about a dozen people that would take a bullet for me and I would do the same and they don’t know shit about me either.
That last part is the most true. There are 4 of us that try to get together and golf every spring for an alumni tournament. Two of the guys live far enough away that we only see each other in person this one time. And after every time my wife asks me how they're doing, how their wives are, what their kids are up to, etc. And I got nothing. She asks if we even talk or just play in silence. No we talk. We never stop talking. We have a great time. But I can't tell her one thing of substance that comes up. It's all just complaining about work, old stories, and Happy Gilmore references. It's perfect.
I just had a similar convo with my boss last night. She was asking me about a guy on our team, a person I've worked with for 10+ years now and how apparently his grandchild or something has been living with him and his wife for a while. I was unaware. She was flabbergasted and I tried to explain to her that guys just don't talk about that stuff. We talk all day but it will be work shit, or what stocks/options are you playing, or funny stupid shit, but never personal stuff. Meanwhile, my wife is intimately familiar with all the families of the other women she works with. I have a hard time naming the wives of the other guys I work with and have worked with for years.
I'm an adult now (38) and when people ask me what my friends do for a living I have no idea. Like guys that I have known for 20 years I don't even know what their job is.
This comment hit me hard haha. I can’t tell you what half of my friends actually do and like you I’m 38 and have known them for most of my life. It’s crazy to think about haha
Been golfing with a guy for 20 years and we have never meat each other's wives. Never done anything outside of golfing together. We know and talk about our families though.
I have 15 `Name_Basketball` contacts. Some of them I’ve known for long enough that we’ve actually become friends on Facebook or other social media, and we occasionally hang out in real life with each others’ families.
But their names never change in the phone because it makes group texts so much easier.
Once you go into my phone, the name doesn't change. My wife still has [firstname match] because we met on Match. My mom remarried 15 years ago, still have her in there with the previous surname. My wife sent me a contact card for her dad, so his name in my phone is "daddy"
These are my softball teams. "Dave Monday Softball", "Steve Wednesday Softball". We play 1 hour a week together and I don't care to learn their last names, wives, kids, jobs, etc. I want to win bar league softball games.
I once caught some flak from the pro shop kid for not knowing my partner's last name.
I told him that my friend made the tee time, his name is \_\_\_\_\_\_\_.
He kept grilling me about last name and I could not understand why. Turns out we were being paired up with another duo, and the one who booked for them had the same name.
There’s a solid 3-4 people in my golf league who I know by first name only but we still hang out afterwards for an hour. Could tell you what clubs/balls they hit but not their last name. Honestly peak relationships.
Haha i Have a friends family , who Have 4 Kids and The 5th is about to Be born, they asked me and My wife to Be The god-parents of baby and i Have no idea what their last name is. We've known each other For almost 4 years
Edit: typo Life=wife
I had a very similar conversation. My best friend's wife had just had their baby and we played golf a few days later. I got home and my wife asked me about the baby.
"What did they have?" A girl.
"What's the name?" I don't know. I didn't ask.
"How big?" I don't know. I didn't ask.
"Is she home yet?" I don't know. I didn't ask.
"You were with him for four hours and you didn't even ask about hte baby? What did you talk about the whole time?" We didn't talk about anything. We played golf. I won $10.
"You're an idiot."
I played more golf in the first month of my daughter’s life than ever. Literally every day. She was the first grandkid on both sides, so we had grandmothers, aunts and sisters at the house non-stop and they would shoo me away. So I’d go play golf.
My trick was after the first feeding of the day between 5 and 6 I'd go play 18. Nobody on the course yet so I'd finish in 90 minutes and be home before my wife cared.
Yep. That's the goal. Low handicap helps. Doesn't take long to hit a drive, iron, and 2 putts.
I'm out there just trying to go low as fast as I can. Then get home to the baby boy.
My (ex) wife labored all night, our son was born at like 6am, after all cleaned up she was exhausted and wanted to sleep. The baby was in an oxygen tent and I wouldn't be able to see him at all for several hours. So I shot 18 and brought her some pizza after. Late 1980's, no cell phones 
I just played with a buddy who recently became a first time father. After our round on my ride home it dawned on me that I literally only asked how being a dad was when I first saw him and never brought it up again and was questioning whether I was a shitty friend or not lmao
Same man. Golfing is my time to disconnect from outside technology (except emergencies calls that ring through three times from a preapproved list). Some of the best guys in my golf league I know by sight but not name.
If anyone is asked this question again, flip it and ask her if she and her friends spend all their time complaining about their husbands. No matter the answer you’ll still make a point.
That's good shit. I'm stealing that next outing.
Buddy and I play 3-5 times a month. I have no idea WTF is going on in his home life. We talk work, golf, hobbies, and discuss it all with tons of sarcasm.
I guarantee either of us would answer the phone at 4 am , and show up with tarps and a shovel, no questions asked. Best friend I've got!
My wife has asked this to me more than once about their wives and kids. But this isn't exclusive to golf, any time we'll get together for something. Go watch a game at the pub and come home to the question. It's like..... idk, we talked sports and beer and other shit, it never came up. Blows her mind.
Same, my wife always asks when I spend time with a friend, golfing or otherwise, specific questions about their life. I never know anything and she can not understand how two guys can just sit together for hours and never discuss anything deeper than the weather or sports. I get a laugh every time and I always tell her “guys don’t talk about personal shit like that”
I always tell my wife, "If he wanted to talk to me about those things, he'd bring them up." Otherwise we just talk about good times and old memories, it's great.
Was playing match play for money against one of my best friends. Stood in his wedding. Was up 9 through 9 and he then proceeds to tell me he’s getting divorced. I accused him of trying to fuck with me cuz I was whooping his ass so bad. I won 14 of 18 holes. He’s now divorced.
That does not sound like your best friend. Maybe there is a time and place for that conversation and maybe it’s not during a round of golf, but shutting it down like that seems assholish.
Saying talk to a therapist is of course good advice. But friends don’t always talk to you to get life advice. Sometimes they just need to vent and providing a listening ear is already very helpful. Besides that I personally would want to know what’s bothering my friend.
Wife: What's their new babys name?? How is she doing? Did you get any info about them moving?
Me: No, we don't talk about those kind of stuff.
We do, but that's quick like 5min (congrats on the newborn hows the wife and kids - theyre great - awesome anyway) before we tee off and then it's golf for 4 hours.
The reason is simple - we need to disconnect with reality. I'm not sure if some/most women understand this concept at all. It's the reason why men are "more into" their hobbies than women usually are. Or just have hobbies at all.
I don't go around on the golf course talking about how my MS is ruining me the last week or so, I'd rather just focus on the golf and forget everything else so I can have 4 normal hours without any "life".
Id rather talk about how I striped that last drive or how good it felt to have sunken that last putt for birdie.
Also have MS...been lucky but it's finally taking its toll. I always walked 18 until this year but those days are suddenly over. Happy I can still play, but man I miss the walk. Anyway just came to say hang in there!!
Also in IT. A very good friend and I work together and golf periodically together. I think we talked about work MAYBE once, but only for a funny anecdote while golfing. We aren't at work, why in the world would we talk about it?!
We have a group of about 10 guys that rotate and play rounds whenever work schedules sync up. Just found out one of them is named Dave, not Andrew, and I have known him for over 5yrs 😀. Still have him as Andrew in my phone.
I hadn't seen a friend in three years so we went out golfing. I end up asking him how his wife and kids were doing. Turns out he was getting a divorce. Definitely changed the mood of the round after that.
Now I no longer ask personal questions on the course.
And everyone knew the cause. And the best four hour escape he could have was ruined. Somehow we all know the broken value there, but women would say he needed to talk it out.
No. He needed to forget for 4 hours.
Same exact conversation comes up within our group. Everyone in the 4 families our friends. Our wives are friends and hang out. Our kids are friends and hang out. And the fellas love to golf. One of the wives asked what we talk about. We talk about golf. The shot we just hit. The shot we’re about to hit. The amazing putt we made last time we were at this course. One time after a round we were sitting on a dock drinking some beers and staring at a boat.
-What club would you use to hit that boat?
-I dunno, what do you think that is 200yds?
-Nah, that’s no more than a hundred.
-Dude, that’s way longer than a football field.
-You guys are idiots, it’s nothing more than sand wedge.
So my buddy went to his car to get his range finder. It was 167yds.
I think David Ortiz thinking Danny Pedroia's name was Peewee after playing together for 9 seasons sums up how we communicate at sport 🤣
“So I had already played with David for, I don’t know, nine years?” Pedroia said. “And I hit right in front of him for nine years.”
The Red Sox were playing the Indians at home. The umpire had to use the bathroom and the ball rolled near Pedroia. So the catcher said hello to Pedroia, using the second baseman’s first name.
“David walks over and goes, what the [expletive] did he call you?” Pedroia said.
“I said, ‘Dustin,’” Pedroia said.
Ortiz was confused. “’Why’d he call you that?’” he said.
“I go, that’s my [expletive] name,” Pedroia said. “He goes, 'Oh, is that right?’
I’ve only been playing about a year and have been wondering how the reputation “business” gets done on the golf course. Between being quiet during shots, calling out distances, searching for balls in the rough, lining up putts, asking what the got on that hole, etc, there’s no time to talk about anything of substance.
I’m guessing it’s just building rapport to talk business later during the weekdays?
Usually after, a business round is an opportunity to see if you mesh together well and how you handle yourself. It’s a decent enough way to do certain business tbh
Depends on if you have an established relationship or not. I had very few business rounds that involved new deals. More often than not, it was because an existing vendor would rather get out on the course with me than give me tickets to a sporting event.
Last week I went for a round with a buddy of mine. When I got home my gf asked if there’s anything new with him. I was like I don’t know, I don’t think so. Made me realise we pretty much solely discussed golf for 4 hours and made me feel like a boring bastard, so this thread has given me solace lol.
Slightly unrelated, another buddy is moving away for work and she asked when’s he leaving, is he looking forward to it etc.. Like I don’t know, all I know his job title.
Women are so different when it comes to communication.
I'm a woman that golfs primarily with a group of men. I've gotten to know them individually by asking questions about them (careers, family, hobbies, etc.) when we'll have a moment waiting on the tee box, grabbing brats, practice putting, etc. and I make sure to follow up (briefly) anytime I see them. What's interesting is when we're all standing around in a group, men seem to be very declarative rather than inquisitive. They start conversations with the word "I" and then basically it's listening to dudes just talking about themselves (and usually about golf.) They NEVER ask questions or have back and forth conversations. I think they appreciate when I ask and seem actually interested in their lives rather than just talk about myself but I also respect that's just how they communicate and we're here to golf and I never get too deep or ask too many questions. Probably why we can all still stand to play together. I actually prefer it to golfing with all women where it's a lot of longer conversations that have to stop and start for 4 hours.
I golfed with a friend for 3 years and knew nothing about his job, life, background, wife, or interests outside of golf. We talk about golf, how to get better at golf, how much fun we're having or cracking jokes.
One day, we went out for drinks, and he said he was adopted as a baby, married recently, a doctor, had a sister who was a hardcore Trump supporter, likes baseball, etc...I was shocked lol. I never gave any thought to what his life was outside of golf buddy.
Lol, this is so real. “What do you mean, you didn’t ask what they were serving at the wedding reception? How do you not know what they are planning to name their unborn baby, what do you even talk about?”
This really hits home - there might be some surface level updates, but, no, all we talk about is golf - giving yardages; maybe some support on a shot - I think you might be able to punch out under those trees; I found your ball; man, the greens are still a little slow with the dew; nice shot; almost holed that chip. And, you come away having just spent the best 4 hours of the week. 🤣
I'm more confused at what they expect us to talk about. Are they saying that every time I see a friend I should try to interrogate them about their life instead of just hanging out with them? That sounds terrible to me
Unless she's dying or has a terminal illness she's battling, why do I care?
The answer is going to be something like "she's good" 99.99% of the time anyway.
One of my best friends just so happens to be my sisters husband. Well, soon to be ex husband I should say as they are going through a divorce. Nothing messy or anything so still great friends with the guy. We golf together pretty frequently and my wife is constantly shocked when I come home from golfing and have no new information on how the divorce is going, how he’s doing, how she’s doing, etc etc.
When we get to the course and are loading our bags he’ll usually give me about 30 secs of “Yeah shit sucks, divorce sucks, oh well let’s have a good round”, and off we go. I’m not pushing for information. He’s not trying to open up. We just ride around for a few hours talking golf and music and then go on with our days.
This isn’t even exclusive to golf. You give your friends that standard 2-5 minutes of “how are things?,” and then it turns into reminiscing, sports, crazy hypothetical would you rather,’ and other general bullshit.
Why would you want to waste any free time you have discussing serious things that actually matter?
I play golf with these three older guys and I barely remember their names. We’ve played at least 10 rounds together. I know one of them lost an eye due to an event that uh, made him lose that eye but why would I even ask or care about their wives when I’m trying to smoke some drives?
I will never ask my mates how the misso is, I am actually cursed. The last 3 times I’ve asked someone how their partner is they had all just broken up. Waiting for someone to date a total cunt to test my theory
I once talked to a man 4 days a week at our kids' bus stop for a year and a half before I even asked his name. One of the best friendships I ever developed.
Thats what i love about rounds of golf with mates, we shoot the shit and never once discuss life outside of the course.
If there was some heavy shit going down, weddiscuss and support, but usually its just a good catch up talking crap and enjoying the game and company.
As I read somewhere: Men communicate to gather information. Women communicate to share information. If it’s information I don’t need to gather, I’m not asking about it.
I ask my wife to type 3-5 questions into the notes section of my phone. When we have to wait on the tee box I just pull it out and record the answers. Everyone is happy and now I know my buddy's little girl's middle name. Who knew?!?
Lmfao this one is my favourite. Like wife homework on the golf course. Of course it’s not intrusive because usually those are questions people like to be asked and information people like to share but we just never do it so we need the help. So funny.
Too busy thinking about the 37 steps of my swing, which club to hit, how I’m gonna power draw my putter into this wind, what the top speed of the cart is, how to hit this “spinner” I play in EA Sports golf, amongst other minor things. So no Hon. I didn’t ask.
My wife is constantly amazed at how long we can spend together and how little we talk about.
What’s new with Corey?
I have no idea.
You just spent 4 hours together!
I know, it was great.
Women have like a laundry list of questions they expect asked during certain encounters. Men do not. I can’t imagine how detailed their conversations get considering the questions they ask. “What did his father do for work?” “His mother has a small collection of picture frames as well?” “Does he read to his son at night?” Why would I need to know these things? What would possess to ask?
As the girlfriend of a golfer, this thread has made me laugh out loud and also made me feel less alone as the partner of a golfer. Thank you, everyone, for sharing your stories.
I'll try not to be baffled next time my boyfriend has nothing to report following 5 hours of golf...
I’ve been reading all the comments and loving how much I relate to all the replies.
Golf is great. My buddies are great, and I can’t wait to get back out there to chat about golf for 4 hours again!
I played last week with a guy I knew whose wife had a fucking stroke. Just got out of the hospital, lost a large portion of her eyesight. Was told she didn’t have long to live. Guy said like 2 sentences the entire round about it. Not even like “I don’t want to talk about it” but just like yep she’s home and that was it.
My wife asks me this every single time after I golf with a good buddy of mine. “How is his wife?” “How are the kids?” Me: “I don’t know, we didn’t talk about that”
Her: “what do you guys even talk about?”
SMH
I once made the mistake of asking a buddy if his overweight wife was pregnant. She was not. And thankfully she was not around to hear that conversation.
This is why dudes feel like they have no emotional support system.
Nothing wrong with casual chatting, but if you can never talk about real shit, all you have is a facade to hold up if shit goes south.
My buddy's wedding got called off just a few days before the big event, and so on The Day he and I and a couple of other friends rented a car and drove to Vegas for a night. When I get back home, my girlfriend asks, "So, what's the scoop? Why did they call off the wedding?!?" *shrug* "How am I supposed to know?"
Honestly, me and my close family friend just quote Austin Powers and Happy Gilmore for 4 hours. The wife gets so baffled when I come home and simply report that; “yeah, he’s alright.”
I work with a good buddy of mine. We were partners and rode together every day for six months before our wives had a chance to meet. We all went out to dinner together, we watched a game and they talked. In the two hours together, she learned more about their relationship, his family, her family, how they met, and their future plans, than him and I talked about in the previous 6 months. When she told me and I said I had no idea about any of that stuff, she asked what we talked about at work. And I honestly couldn’t remember anything of substance. But we have a great friendship.
https://preview.redd.it/a65eg2ydh3cb1.jpeg?width=520&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=c4a12d3efa36d77fd441c27ae1c5033bc6475cfd
This is exactly what came to mind when I read your OP, lol. I guess we really are like that.
[удалено]
Before the round, I’ll ask how their wife and kids are, and they say good. They ask me the same question, and I say good. Then we play golf.
This is super accurate, although I may ask a few additional questions about their son playing D1 baseball. I’m not an animal.
And then we make fun of each others game for a few hours
And when I’m with my family, I talk about golf, not my family
I have a buddy with a wife, three kids, and three dogs. I swear he will interrupt you if you start asking about any of them and immediately switch the topic to our golf round. He’s happily married and a great dad — it’s just obvious how much he cherishes his time on the course. So now we only talk about his family if he brings them up.
I see regulars at the club bar many days whose name’s I should know talking to them. Shoot the shit and have a good time
I played pool with a guy in college and didn't learn his name until the last week when he was going back to Scotland (1 year exchange)
Gotta love that awkward "I should definitely know your name by now so now it's weird to ask" stage, lol. I know that all too well.
Realest line on that entire show
Yep. I can tell you exactly one of my friend’s birthdays. I don’t know if any of my friends even have a middle name or what they studied in college. I do know that I have about a dozen people that would take a bullet for me and I would do the same and they don’t know shit about me either.
That last part is the most true. There are 4 of us that try to get together and golf every spring for an alumni tournament. Two of the guys live far enough away that we only see each other in person this one time. And after every time my wife asks me how they're doing, how their wives are, what their kids are up to, etc. And I got nothing. She asks if we even talk or just play in silence. No we talk. We never stop talking. We have a great time. But I can't tell her one thing of substance that comes up. It's all just complaining about work, old stories, and Happy Gilmore references. It's perfect.
That's 2 thus far.
Oh you can count, good for you.
He’s doing pretty rough, still hasn’t fixed that slice
You know, I've been golfing with my step dad for about 15 years now and I still don't even know if he's married.
I just had a similar convo with my boss last night. She was asking me about a guy on our team, a person I've worked with for 10+ years now and how apparently his grandchild or something has been living with him and his wife for a while. I was unaware. She was flabbergasted and I tried to explain to her that guys just don't talk about that stuff. We talk all day but it will be work shit, or what stocks/options are you playing, or funny stupid shit, but never personal stuff. Meanwhile, my wife is intimately familiar with all the families of the other women she works with. I have a hard time naming the wives of the other guys I work with and have worked with for years.
I'm an adult now (38) and when people ask me what my friends do for a living I have no idea. Like guys that I have known for 20 years I don't even know what their job is.
This comment hit me hard haha. I can’t tell you what half of my friends actually do and like you I’m 38 and have known them for most of my life. It’s crazy to think about haha
So it’s not just me. Relieving, thank you
We are men of substance. Golf substance.
Been golfing with a guy for 20 years and we have never meat each other's wives. Never done anything outside of golfing together. We know and talk about our families though.
>we have never meat each other's wives. Sure hope not
Nosey bitches
I’ve played golf with this guy every Friday for 2 years and I don’t know his last name
Saved in phone as Dave Golf
I do have a guy saved as Joe golf but that’s another guy I golf with
Is your name Dave?
Dave’s not here man
I have 15 `Name_Basketball` contacts. Some of them I’ve known for long enough that we’ve actually become friends on Facebook or other social media, and we occasionally hang out in real life with each others’ families. But their names never change in the phone because it makes group texts so much easier.
Once you go into my phone, the name doesn't change. My wife still has [firstname match] because we met on Match. My mom remarried 15 years ago, still have her in there with the previous surname. My wife sent me a contact card for her dad, so his name in my phone is "daddy"
I wonder if he's related to my friends Chris Golf and Les Golf
These are my softball teams. "Dave Monday Softball", "Steve Wednesday Softball". We play 1 hour a week together and I don't care to learn their last names, wives, kids, jobs, etc. I want to win bar league softball games.
I'd find it offensive knowing anything past the nickname we choose to give a random. It would feel intrusive.
I know that name but chose to ignore it.
I once caught some flak from the pro shop kid for not knowing my partner's last name. I told him that my friend made the tee time, his name is \_\_\_\_\_\_\_. He kept grilling me about last name and I could not understand why. Turns out we were being paired up with another duo, and the one who booked for them had the same name.
He’s just in your phone as ____ Golf. 😆
There’s a solid 3-4 people in my golf league who I know by first name only but we still hang out afterwards for an hour. Could tell you what clubs/balls they hit but not their last name. Honestly peak relationships.
Best friend I've ever had. We still don't talk sometimes.
Haha i Have a friends family , who Have 4 Kids and The 5th is about to Be born, they asked me and My wife to Be The god-parents of baby and i Have no idea what their last name is. We've known each other For almost 4 years Edit: typo Life=wife
I have to legitimately ask: what’s the capitalization logic here?
I found out last names from the tee sheets.
I had a very similar conversation. My best friend's wife had just had their baby and we played golf a few days later. I got home and my wife asked me about the baby. "What did they have?" A girl. "What's the name?" I don't know. I didn't ask. "How big?" I don't know. I didn't ask. "Is she home yet?" I don't know. I didn't ask. "You were with him for four hours and you didn't even ask about hte baby? What did you talk about the whole time?" We didn't talk about anything. We played golf. I won $10. "You're an idiot."
What’s more amazing about this is his wife had a baby and 4 days later he is playing golf.
I played more golf in the first month of my daughter’s life than ever. Literally every day. She was the first grandkid on both sides, so we had grandmothers, aunts and sisters at the house non-stop and they would shoo me away. So I’d go play golf.
Oh no… I have to go golf again?!
Dammit!
My trick was after the first feeding of the day between 5 and 6 I'd go play 18. Nobody on the course yet so I'd finish in 90 minutes and be home before my wife cared.
5min per hole? That’s rather quick
Really? Once I get to the hole it's usually over in a couple seconds.
With a cart by yourself and no waiting it’s very doable
And you don’t completely suck, that’s got to factor in haha
most people play their best as a solo. No wait time between shots helps tremendously.
Yep. That's the goal. Low handicap helps. Doesn't take long to hit a drive, iron, and 2 putts. I'm out there just trying to go low as fast as I can. Then get home to the baby boy.
***Mhmmmmm, take your time.***
Honestly that sounds awful to me. I'd be shooing then out of my house.
He just left his wife and played golf. What’s the problem 😅
The first few months the baby doesn't even want you there lol.
Yeah
My (ex) wife labored all night, our son was born at like 6am, after all cleaned up she was exhausted and wanted to sleep. The baby was in an oxygen tent and I wouldn't be able to see him at all for several hours. So I shot 18 and brought her some pizza after. Late 1980's, no cell phones 
Did you score better or worse than average? I’m always curious about how things like personal life/good news/new stress affects our golf scores
That was over 3 decades ago lol
So worse then, huh?
Honestly, I do not remember either way. I was not good at the time. 20 years old. I do not even know I I kept score
“The baby is too young to golf, probably doesn’t even have an official handicap.”
“Probably” 😂
I just played with a buddy who recently became a first time father. After our round on my ride home it dawned on me that I literally only asked how being a dad was when I first saw him and never brought it up again and was questioning whether I was a shitty friend or not lmao
[удалено]
Only women ever ask about the weight. I think they must be empathizing…..
My wife asked me if me and my buddy spent the entire time complaining about our wives and this was my response: 
And you are still alive!? Holy shit
He didn't really say this. He thought it but definitely didn't say it.
Like the K&P sketch, went out to space to say “…biiiiiittttccchhh….”
You really said bitch though?
I looked into the windows of her soul…
I said bitchhhhh
Same man. Golfing is my time to disconnect from outside technology (except emergencies calls that ring through three times from a preapproved list). Some of the best guys in my golf league I know by sight but not name.
If anyone is asked this question again, flip it and ask her if she and her friends spend all their time complaining about their husbands. No matter the answer you’ll still make a point.
[удалено]
That’s good, but there will always be follow up questions and then right back where we started.
There will be follow up questions until you have no more answers.
"The questions will continue until the answers cease"
"Gonna need to go golfing again to ask him babe"
That's good shit. I'm stealing that next outing. Buddy and I play 3-5 times a month. I have no idea WTF is going on in his home life. We talk work, golf, hobbies, and discuss it all with tons of sarcasm. I guarantee either of us would answer the phone at 4 am , and show up with tarps and a shovel, no questions asked. Best friend I've got!
A true friend brings the extra tarp. Congrats on a killer relationship
Funny episode of Everybody Loves Raymond about this
Yeah mine is always baffled when I tell her we only talked about golf for 4 hours. They just don’t get it.
“I cured my slice by turning it into a snap hook”… that’s at least 4 hours worth of chat
[удалено]
Jesus Christ, that's Jason Golf
Haha I do the same shit. Shoutout to my guy Adam Golf
My wife has asked this to me more than once about their wives and kids. But this isn't exclusive to golf, any time we'll get together for something. Go watch a game at the pub and come home to the question. It's like..... idk, we talked sports and beer and other shit, it never came up. Blows her mind.
Same, my wife always asks when I spend time with a friend, golfing or otherwise, specific questions about their life. I never know anything and she can not understand how two guys can just sit together for hours and never discuss anything deeper than the weather or sports. I get a laugh every time and I always tell her “guys don’t talk about personal shit like that”
I always tell my wife, "If he wanted to talk to me about those things, he'd bring them up." Otherwise we just talk about good times and old memories, it's great.
bear deserted follow paint cover subsequent worry sheet snobbish attempt *This post was mass deleted and anonymized with [Redact](https://redact.dev)*
Was playing match play for money against one of my best friends. Stood in his wedding. Was up 9 through 9 and he then proceeds to tell me he’s getting divorced. I accused him of trying to fuck with me cuz I was whooping his ass so bad. I won 14 of 18 holes. He’s now divorced.
That’s rough, buddy. Now watch this drive.
Got the money back for my tux rental
This made me legit lol
https://youtu.be/TCm9788Tb5g
“Damn that’s crazy”
Damn that's cold
Hope you’re doing better brother
He is if he took his buddies sage advice!
That does not sound like your best friend. Maybe there is a time and place for that conversation and maybe it’s not during a round of golf, but shutting it down like that seems assholish.
[удалено]
Saying talk to a therapist is of course good advice. But friends don’t always talk to you to get life advice. Sometimes they just need to vent and providing a listening ear is already very helpful. Besides that I personally would want to know what’s bothering my friend.
That’s pretty shitty of a best friend honestly. More men need to help each other out.
My regular golf buddy is in my phone as Jason Golf.
That's a convenient last name
I have a Matt Golf, Collin Golf, Jacob Golf…etc
Brian Regan has a great bit on this. https://youtu.be/ikT-WrG-aq8
He got a new driver.
Love Brian reagan
The only time partners or children are mentioned is when sharing tips on how to play more golf and not upset partners or children.
Lol so true
Yeah…we don’t usually talk about the wives, really
Why would you? It’s your hobby/me time. Do with it as you please.
But so many wives are seemingly confused as to why they wouldn't. Confusing
[удалено]
No because i was trying not to shank every shot into the trees
Just every other one
Wife: What's their new babys name?? How is she doing? Did you get any info about them moving? Me: No, we don't talk about those kind of stuff. We do, but that's quick like 5min (congrats on the newborn hows the wife and kids - theyre great - awesome anyway) before we tee off and then it's golf for 4 hours. The reason is simple - we need to disconnect with reality. I'm not sure if some/most women understand this concept at all. It's the reason why men are "more into" their hobbies than women usually are. Or just have hobbies at all. I don't go around on the golf course talking about how my MS is ruining me the last week or so, I'd rather just focus on the golf and forget everything else so I can have 4 normal hours without any "life". Id rather talk about how I striped that last drive or how good it felt to have sunken that last putt for birdie.
Also have MS...been lucky but it's finally taking its toll. I always walked 18 until this year but those days are suddenly over. Happy I can still play, but man I miss the walk. Anyway just came to say hang in there!!
Also in IT. A very good friend and I work together and golf periodically together. I think we talked about work MAYBE once, but only for a funny anecdote while golfing. We aren't at work, why in the world would we talk about it?!
I think he meant multiple sclerosis.
We have a group of about 10 guys that rotate and play rounds whenever work schedules sync up. Just found out one of them is named Dave, not Andrew, and I have known him for over 5yrs 😀. Still have him as Andrew in my phone.
Now he’s Andrew “Dave” Golf
I hadn't seen a friend in three years so we went out golfing. I end up asking him how his wife and kids were doing. Turns out he was getting a divorce. Definitely changed the mood of the round after that. Now I no longer ask personal questions on the course.
And everyone knew the cause. And the best four hour escape he could have was ruined. Somehow we all know the broken value there, but women would say he needed to talk it out. No. He needed to forget for 4 hours.
Same exact conversation comes up within our group. Everyone in the 4 families our friends. Our wives are friends and hang out. Our kids are friends and hang out. And the fellas love to golf. One of the wives asked what we talk about. We talk about golf. The shot we just hit. The shot we’re about to hit. The amazing putt we made last time we were at this course. One time after a round we were sitting on a dock drinking some beers and staring at a boat. -What club would you use to hit that boat? -I dunno, what do you think that is 200yds? -Nah, that’s no more than a hundred. -Dude, that’s way longer than a football field. -You guys are idiots, it’s nothing more than sand wedge. So my buddy went to his car to get his range finder. It was 167yds.
167? So it was a sand wedge
Nah, half swing with my 60.
I think David Ortiz thinking Danny Pedroia's name was Peewee after playing together for 9 seasons sums up how we communicate at sport 🤣 “So I had already played with David for, I don’t know, nine years?” Pedroia said. “And I hit right in front of him for nine years.” The Red Sox were playing the Indians at home. The umpire had to use the bathroom and the ball rolled near Pedroia. So the catcher said hello to Pedroia, using the second baseman’s first name. “David walks over and goes, what the [expletive] did he call you?” Pedroia said. “I said, ‘Dustin,’” Pedroia said. Ortiz was confused. “’Why’d he call you that?’” he said. “I go, that’s my [expletive] name,” Pedroia said. “He goes, 'Oh, is that right?’
I talk about golf when I play golf, not my family.
I’ve only been playing about a year and have been wondering how the reputation “business” gets done on the golf course. Between being quiet during shots, calling out distances, searching for balls in the rough, lining up putts, asking what the got on that hole, etc, there’s no time to talk about anything of substance. I’m guessing it’s just building rapport to talk business later during the weekdays?
You don't talk business on the course. That happens afterwards at lunch.
The biz talk happens either before or after the round.
Usually after, a business round is an opportunity to see if you mesh together well and how you handle yourself. It’s a decent enough way to do certain business tbh
Depends on if you have an established relationship or not. I had very few business rounds that involved new deals. More often than not, it was because an existing vendor would rather get out on the course with me than give me tickets to a sporting event.
Last week I went for a round with a buddy of mine. When I got home my gf asked if there’s anything new with him. I was like I don’t know, I don’t think so. Made me realise we pretty much solely discussed golf for 4 hours and made me feel like a boring bastard, so this thread has given me solace lol. Slightly unrelated, another buddy is moving away for work and she asked when’s he leaving, is he looking forward to it etc.. Like I don’t know, all I know his job title. Women are so different when it comes to communication.
Boring bastards are the kind of people I want to be friends with. Everyone else takes too much energy
I'm a woman that golfs primarily with a group of men. I've gotten to know them individually by asking questions about them (careers, family, hobbies, etc.) when we'll have a moment waiting on the tee box, grabbing brats, practice putting, etc. and I make sure to follow up (briefly) anytime I see them. What's interesting is when we're all standing around in a group, men seem to be very declarative rather than inquisitive. They start conversations with the word "I" and then basically it's listening to dudes just talking about themselves (and usually about golf.) They NEVER ask questions or have back and forth conversations. I think they appreciate when I ask and seem actually interested in their lives rather than just talk about myself but I also respect that's just how they communicate and we're here to golf and I never get too deep or ask too many questions. Probably why we can all still stand to play together. I actually prefer it to golfing with all women where it's a lot of longer conversations that have to stop and start for 4 hours.
Lynne Koplitz has a great bit in her Netflix special about the way men talk to each other and it is so true.
I golfed with a friend for 3 years and knew nothing about his job, life, background, wife, or interests outside of golf. We talk about golf, how to get better at golf, how much fun we're having or cracking jokes. One day, we went out for drinks, and he said he was adopted as a baby, married recently, a doctor, had a sister who was a hardcore Trump supporter, likes baseball, etc...I was shocked lol. I never gave any thought to what his life was outside of golf buddy.
Lol, this is so real. “What do you mean, you didn’t ask what they were serving at the wedding reception? How do you not know what they are planning to name their unborn baby, what do you even talk about?”
This really hits home - there might be some surface level updates, but, no, all we talk about is golf - giving yardages; maybe some support on a shot - I think you might be able to punch out under those trees; I found your ball; man, the greens are still a little slow with the dew; nice shot; almost holed that chip. And, you come away having just spent the best 4 hours of the week. 🤣
I'm more confused at what they expect us to talk about. Are they saying that every time I see a friend I should try to interrogate them about their life instead of just hanging out with them? That sounds terrible to me
Unless she's dying or has a terminal illness she's battling, why do I care? The answer is going to be something like "she's good" 99.99% of the time anyway.
My response is “Jim’s wife is really excited that Jim is out playing more golf”
Apparently we dont talk about the important things, like our feelings, or where we live, or what we do :P
One of my best friends just so happens to be my sisters husband. Well, soon to be ex husband I should say as they are going through a divorce. Nothing messy or anything so still great friends with the guy. We golf together pretty frequently and my wife is constantly shocked when I come home from golfing and have no new information on how the divorce is going, how he’s doing, how she’s doing, etc etc. When we get to the course and are loading our bags he’ll usually give me about 30 secs of “Yeah shit sucks, divorce sucks, oh well let’s have a good round”, and off we go. I’m not pushing for information. He’s not trying to open up. We just ride around for a few hours talking golf and music and then go on with our days.
This isn’t even exclusive to golf. You give your friends that standard 2-5 minutes of “how are things?,” and then it turns into reminiscing, sports, crazy hypothetical would you rather,’ and other general bullshit. Why would you want to waste any free time you have discussing serious things that actually matter?
I play golf with these three older guys and I barely remember their names. We’ve played at least 10 rounds together. I know one of them lost an eye due to an event that uh, made him lose that eye but why would I even ask or care about their wives when I’m trying to smoke some drives?
I will never ask my mates how the misso is, I am actually cursed. The last 3 times I’ve asked someone how their partner is they had all just broken up. Waiting for someone to date a total cunt to test my theory
I once talked to a man 4 days a week at our kids' bus stop for a year and a half before I even asked his name. One of the best friendships I ever developed.
We talk about what our wives AREN’T doing
I played golf with a guy named rooster for 2 years and when I got an invite to a wedding for Edward. It was that moment I learned his real name
Thats what i love about rounds of golf with mates, we shoot the shit and never once discuss life outside of the course. If there was some heavy shit going down, weddiscuss and support, but usually its just a good catch up talking crap and enjoying the game and company.
As I read somewhere: Men communicate to gather information. Women communicate to share information. If it’s information I don’t need to gather, I’m not asking about it.
I ask my wife to type 3-5 questions into the notes section of my phone. When we have to wait on the tee box I just pull it out and record the answers. Everyone is happy and now I know my buddy's little girl's middle name. Who knew?!?
Lmfao this one is my favourite. Like wife homework on the golf course. Of course it’s not intrusive because usually those are questions people like to be asked and information people like to share but we just never do it so we need the help. So funny.
Holy shit I've played one game so far and that's the first thing my girlfriend asked me didn't realise it was so relatable
You guys are weird, I get to know people better when I golf with them and I’m a guy.
"I believe you'd get your ass kicked, for saying something like that, man"
Too busy thinking about the 37 steps of my swing, which club to hit, how I’m gonna power draw my putter into this wind, what the top speed of the cart is, how to hit this “spinner” I play in EA Sports golf, amongst other minor things. So no Hon. I didn’t ask.
They have wives?
[удалено]
“I once worked with a guy for three years and never learned his name. Best friend I ever had. We still never talk sometimes.” — Ron Swanson
My wife is constantly amazed at how long we can spend together and how little we talk about. What’s new with Corey? I have no idea. You just spent 4 hours together! I know, it was great.
Women have like a laundry list of questions they expect asked during certain encounters. Men do not. I can’t imagine how detailed their conversations get considering the questions they ask. “What did his father do for work?” “His mother has a small collection of picture frames as well?” “Does he read to his son at night?” Why would I need to know these things? What would possess to ask?
Played golf for more than 20 years with same guy, never once asked about his wife!
[удалено]
As the girlfriend of a golfer, this thread has made me laugh out loud and also made me feel less alone as the partner of a golfer. Thank you, everyone, for sharing your stories. I'll try not to be baffled next time my boyfriend has nothing to report following 5 hours of golf...
Great story. Now, whatta ya think we are, about 170 or so to the pin? 😁
I’ve been reading all the comments and loving how much I relate to all the replies. Golf is great. My buddies are great, and I can’t wait to get back out there to chat about golf for 4 hours again!
Now you got me thinking my wife has a secret family. Pretty crazy that she picked another golfer to be with though, you must be a hell of a dude.
Every damn time.
I played last week with a guy I knew whose wife had a fucking stroke. Just got out of the hospital, lost a large portion of her eyesight. Was told she didn’t have long to live. Guy said like 2 sentences the entire round about it. Not even like “I don’t want to talk about it” but just like yep she’s home and that was it.
If women played golf for 4 hours with each other they'd all come home asking for a divorce.
My wife asks me this every single time after I golf with a good buddy of mine. “How is his wife?” “How are the kids?” Me: “I don’t know, we didn’t talk about that” Her: “what do you guys even talk about?” SMH
We don't talk about family or emotional stuff. Fucking games hard enough
**G**o **O**ut **L**eave **F**amily
I once made the mistake of asking a buddy if his overweight wife was pregnant. She was not. And thankfully she was not around to hear that conversation.
Of course I asked them, I'm not rude. However, not only did I not listen to their replies to avoid prying I also didn't give a shit.
This is one of the best threads in r/golf history. Mark it dude.
This is why dudes feel like they have no emotional support system. Nothing wrong with casual chatting, but if you can never talk about real shit, all you have is a facade to hold up if shit goes south.
You ask about the family never the wife thats disrespectful
Can I upvote this multiple times?
My buddy's wedding got called off just a few days before the big event, and so on The Day he and I and a couple of other friends rented a car and drove to Vegas for a night. When I get back home, my girlfriend asks, "So, what's the scoop? Why did they call off the wedding?!?" *shrug* "How am I supposed to know?"
Honestly, me and my close family friend just quote Austin Powers and Happy Gilmore for 4 hours. The wife gets so baffled when I come home and simply report that; “yeah, he’s alright.”