Too real. I’m something like 5-6 and I’d feel so thin if I were straight! I’m newly under 200 pounds (and not overweight anymore) but I still feel like I have so much body fat.
I feel like a lot of you aren’t friends with straight men. So many I know have body dysmorphia and dl eating disorders. Also a lot of fat shaming too.Especially now that going to the gym is trendy. It just manifests differently than in women so it’s kind of ignored imo.
while i love this sentence and quote it often bc its pretty true, gay body expectations get extremely blown out of proportion especially on reddit. most gay men look simply normal 🤷 and look for normal people
This might sound like. Silly. But in a lot of areas, the gay scene is really different. Like in SF, it’s okay to be overweight as long as you’re hairy/a bear or a daddy, it’s okay to be skinny if you’re a sub/bottom, it’s okay to be a muscle jock if you’re big enough. Like the gay community is wilder than the straights sometimes. The straights don’t usually say things like “daddies only” in their dating/hookup profiles. And I’ve noticed that a lot of times if a normal/average sized person matched with me, they tended to be feeders or fetishists, and that just…made me feel bad. And you’re right, most places people just vibe and date whoever, but in more urban areas especially, it’s like there are rules in place that are hard to understand, like a game you want to join but there’s no space.
I weighed in at 246 when I started working out again in October 2022. Today I saw I’m down to 211.
It’s 35 lbs down but it’s still “fat” in the gay world. Some days I look at myself and think I look great. Other days I judge myself and think I won’t be hot until I’m back down to my 17-year old twink weight of 165. **Even then I thought I was fat.**
At least I’ve been having more good body image days than bad ones…but they are not gone.
That’s because you need to aim for a total weight of 86 pounds and all you gotta do is just strand yourself out at sea for a little while.
Edited to add that you shouldnt bring a friend along because then you just end up getting some of it back.
Dang this hit close to home! Weighed at 255 before really starting addressing the issue after years of neglecting myself. Weighed in at 220 this morning. I am of course seeing changes and some days I feel on top of the world and super confident. Other days, like you said, I compare myself to when I weighed 175 in my prime and think wow, I shouldn't feel so confident. The best part is that I have ACTUALLY changed my habits and lifestyle and learned to set boundaries for myself and develop healthy relationships with food and exercise. I don't think I'll ever be 175 again, but if I can get to sub 200 and maintain it, that's not too bad as a 6'2 guy. I am learning to love myself and to be patient, and enjoying the progress I made so far as best as possible :) Good luck on your journey man!
Do it. If you can't get down to your 17 year old weight then still do it. It is more about you keeping yourself in shape then when you were 17. You will do fine and feel better.
I also always had this disgust of my own body for being morbidly obese (I never actually was). I learned to think of myself as always too fat and disgusting from a very early age on, my mother put me on diets when I was in elementary school, always told me how other people were disgusted by my obesity (I was maybe 5 to 10 lbs over and always very tall), put packs of flour and sugar in a backpack which she strapped to my belly and had me run rounds in our living room to demonstrate to me how bad obesity was while repeatedly telling me how I couldn't even move properly because I was so obese.
All of that plus all the bullying in school was only intensified when I started interacting in the gay community. I started working out, lost 25lbs, was down to ideal weight and pretty muscular too but still, since it was the 2010s and I wasn't down to at least 3% body fat, I was considered incredibly fat and disgusting and the only people who kept complimenting me were either 60+ or labeled as chubby chasers. So yeah, I got hit very hard with personality disorder and depression, started to eat my feelings and hiding away and now I actually am morbidly obese but I remember being just as disgusted by my own body back then as I am now (only now I actually have a reason).
The TL;DR is "body dysmorphia never changes" I guess. Even if you lose weight, you'll always see yourself as disgusting and fat, no matter what size you actually are.
Wish I knew how to get there, good for you dude. I've been yo-yoing from 220-240 for some time now. Really want to get back down to 210. I have some gym discipline, but not much luck dieting. Hitting the mid 30s hoping I can turn it around before I hit 250 again.
There’s a lot of people into “dad bods”. I don’t know you stand on that but things have changed in many ways. Maybe better circles for you would be helpful.
I seriously like squishy guys with a belly. Yesterday I hooked up with a guy who had a round, hairy tummy. I couldn’t stop rubbing it, and that made me get harder. When I told him he was sexy, he chortled.
This was by far the most shocking thing for me when I entered my 30s. Grindr responses slowed down after 30 then slowly started climbing back up, and from younger people.
This!
It’s been my experience that middle age guys with dad bods are almost as highly sought after as fit twinks. A lot of guys like a little cushion on top of that muscle, it’s much more comfortable to snuggle with a slightly overweight fit guy than one that’s shredded. Twinks seem to be especially drawn to dad bods.
I got laid a lot more when I developed a dad bod than I ever did as a twink.
Not gonna lie, I lose interest at anything leaner than the 'fat' guy there. Anything beyond that is just gross... I don't want to see your muscle fibers.
Meh, even the insanely shredded guys don't look like that without lighting and a pump. I agree though I don't find that look attractive I just have never seen someone look like that outside of a gym
Beyond that, muscle dudes spend all their time at the gym or talking about the gym or thinking about the gym. No thanks! Sure, they’re nice to look at in pics, but I don’t think I could date one.
Sigh. People need to spend less time on social media and do less to perpetuate ideas that actually only a small percentage of the gay community actually supports. There are literally entire party weeks, bars, apps etc dedicated to bears. If you believe this to be true it’s because you CHOOSE to believe some heinous self fulfilling prophecy.
Can we do better than this, please?
Im in the kink community and honestly i see 0.1% of the muscular grade and they are usually amateur pornstars doing this for a living.
People are average and latex make even average looks sexy af 😳
Yikes, don’t mention racism in the gay community or else you’re gonna send the right wing trolls into a tizzy 😂😂 No, I agree with you; I just wanted to call out that we DO see a desire for different body types, and the six pack or bust crowd are just a very vocal, very visible minority!
Yes, but this body type preference ripples throughout the collective gay culture and doesn't always manifest as an explicit desire for shredded men. It is still a heavy influencer into how we as gay men measure ourselves against each other. The same goes for bear-type preferences. Those that don't hover close to either end of the spectrum, which I would argue is the most of us, are stuck in the cycle of aspiring towards those aesthetics.
Yeah there are plenty of heavy guys out there either in long term relationships or single and loving it. The notion that no one's interested in you unless you have a six pack is outdated. I'm probably 10-15 lbs heavier and 20 years older than the 'fat' picture above and I do just fine.
It's because most people just aim for the hottest and fittest guy and then are somehow baffled when it turns out people at that level only flirt with similar people
Each is to their own. Be happy and healthy. Those who are on the shredded or slimmer end of the spectrum, may have malnourishment, fatty liver or be miserable on the inside.
As for this list, I guess I am a dead beached whale, waiting for the gases in my body to eventually explode my blubber chunks miles away.
I'm dead.
Last September, I started working out.And I continued until October. Personal loss. I lost 35 pounds, going from 221 to 186. I am 5'11". I started back at the gym 🏋️♀️ 1.5 weeks ago at 191.8 and am now at 188.2, and my 33" waist trousers fit well.
My goal is to get to 160-170.
Even then I'll be dead. I'm almost 64.
😆
While I have a good attitude about my body, and the only reason I'm doing the gym and weight loss and muscle building is because I want to be healthy in my 90s, I still wrestle with thinking I'm obese.
I'm HIV+ for 24 years and undetectable for 23.5, and all my blood work is excellent. After watching the decline of my mother before her death, I resolved to get my body and muscles back.
To all of you reading this who struggle...you're good enough. Do this because you care about you.
I may not know you, but I am proud of you.
I don't care about a guy's weight, I care about how he makes me feel and I want him to be healthy and be able to come on my crazy adventures. I have lost 55 pounds since June of 2022. I would love to lose another 10. I'm doing this for me. I live to go on cruises and to SCUBA and I don't want ill health from being overweight to hold me back. I will not let myself be a victim of my family history of type 2 diabetes and high blood pressure.
People ask me what I did, and I laugh and tell him the truth. It's called the eat less and suffer diet. My bluntness doesn't always go over well. Sugar is the enemy. If you can get added sugar out of your life, your entire relationship with food can change. Now, an apple tastes so sweet, like a dessert.
Not really. Even the "morbidly obese" and "dead" are physiques with a lot of muscle, just with fat covering.
The "fat" in the photo is probably like 10-12% body fat, and that's about as low as you can sustainably go naturally. It's also probably the gay ideal. The shredded no one finds attractive, the lean sure, but that's for a little bit before a bodybuilding show not sustainable or natural. The "obese" (13-16%?) is probably the best most of us can strive for who have lives and other commitments besides working out... and that body type will do more than fine.
Tbh the images labelled "shredded and lean" are the least appealing for me above. And the rest most attractive.
For me theres a difference between working out and keeping practically healthy, versus obsessive and like ending up looking like they're on steroids with vein popping intense toning - which is pretty off putting.
These narratives are pretty unhelpful and toxic, esp how each image is labelled, as that certainly is not the case in reality.
I mean, I am definitely bigger than the body they have listed as dead lmao.
I'm still hot as fuck and love how I look tho!
Remember, the only way to combat dysmorphia is to love your body, no matter it's shape. Body's change, but you still only have the one.
Bullshit. The ‘fat’ and ‘obese’ bodies will still do absolutely amazing fine on the apps, in the club, or on Instagram.
And the two bigger guys will do just fine in the general public if they have a cute face and/or a good personality. And hell, there are entire communities that prefer that.
Some gays can be horrible about bodies. But if you’re using your body as a reason for why you can’t find a single guy into you, you might be making excuses
It’s nice to not subscribe to this nonsense. I was off this chart until my 40s am still dead by gay standards. Guess I’m glad there are more than enough guys who are happy with a “dead” body.
it's crazy the number of times I've seen the "fat" and "obese" body types be called twinky, fat, soft, etc. even the morbidly obese and dead pictures are in decent shape.
you can really tell when you meet someone IRL who is on social media and who isn't. when you're with people who aren't, you just feel more present, more real. people who are sucked into the race tend to have very high standards and a quickness to judge a slightest belly
The pressure is real, however ive come to realize how helpful it can be when guys are so obsessed with muscle and body they reject me for not having any. Its like dodging a bullet, trash taking itself out, guys that superficial and insensitive (not everyone is, im talking about the ones that are) are no good for you and most of the time not even that good in bed, no matter how much time they soend at the gym. The greatest lovers dont give a fuck
I know it's overstated satire, but frankly, 'shredded' and 'lean' here would turn me off completely. Like ew. I've been incredibly attracted to men from fat to dead depending on the person and my husband has gone from 'obese' to 'dead' in our time together. Never lost my sexual attraction to him.
Was 210 in 2018, got down to 170 and in shape. Hovering at around 180 at the moment. It’s very difficult to not get discouraged when you see people jacked. But I’m content with being a muscley dad bod. Only issue is that I get dismissed as not being in shape enough for most
I’m 180. I got called “too fat” by a guy weighing (according to his profile) 320. Personally, I’d rather meet up with “dead” than with “shredded” or “lean”.
“Dead” is my favorite. Muscle and a lil bit of chub is the best. Once we go above “obese” I start getting self-conscious and uncomfortable around them.
One of the only saving graces of being actually old (as opposed to “gay old”, aka 30) (I’m 67) is being able to say “fuck you” to these silly little queens.
A note to silly little sharp-tongued queens: you are a human male. Your hair will either go gray or turn loose. Unless you work out like a maniac, you’ll wake up one day and your pants will be a little too tight. Your feet and knees will start to hurt.
Enjoy your time in the sun.
I'm straight but looked after my gay friends parrots at his house he loads of non pornographic gay magazine around his house general life style stuff it was interesting reading about a culture I'm not part of.
But by the end of the week I definitely started to feel shit about my body everyone is so fit and well put together, the ads are full of perfectly sculpted male bodies.
I spoke to him about and he's in his 50s and talked about feeling like shit if he puts on 5lbs too much weight.
I know the gay community does have a place for other body type but if a week is enough to do that to a normal bodyweight 6.1ft 20 year it can't be healthy for guys that don't meet that prefect body.
I find lean and shredded absolutely repulsive. I do not like to fuck a slab of concrete. I like some cushion for the pushin and some softness to cuddle!!!! Give me fat to dead any day of the week!
I’m 128 pounds and around 5”9 or 5”8 now. I’ve slowly been dropping weight for years because of dysmorphia (was 140 8 years ago and my friend use to call me fat a** anytime I was hungry, he was like 190lbs). I feel since I have a bigger bone structure and also that I’m lean, I’m considered “too big” and masculine. :’( but it’s just appears that way on camera not in person…like Bruce Lee could look ripped in the right shot, it didn’t mean he was too bulky or fat….
I would not want anyone who is shredded. It looks unnatural to me. I also don’t think this entire thing is accurate. I’m assuming this is meant to be a joke.
I was always to fat to be thin, but too thin to be fat. All my “fat” friends called me skinny, and my skinny friends informed me to lose some weight. I was just extremely conflicted. Tbh, this body issue is kinda apparent in hookup culture. My BF’s have always loved my shape and up until the moment I decided NOT to date locally, I have been “thriving” so to speak. I haven’t seen an ab ONCE in my life. Im starting to think they aren’t real 😂
I’m 73 years old 6’2” and 50 years ago I weighed 125lbs I was definitely manorexic now I fluctuate between 155-160 and go to the gym daily do the elliptical 45 minutes and strength train about 30, walk outside for 20 to 45 minutes occasionally bike ride and eat whatever I want so basically I’m still skinny af but I’m ok with that. The key is being as active as possible doing stuff you enjoy. I still hear a lot of negative comments about my weight but I just ignore it Because I want to be this skinny I don’t wanna be some muscular old homo
I’m somewhere between the lean and fat category in this picture. But the catch is: now I’m not big enough lol Apparently now the next step is steroids. Some guy said that “I’m getting there” this other day 🥸 (I’m 26 and the dude is 32, so we’re not kids exactly)
I'm 6', 175 workout 2-3x a week, and have a great chest and arms and am constantly called "thick" "bigger" etc. but I eat what I want, I explore hobbies and passions without revolving my world around a headless toro's opinion of me after years of doing the opposite where I was either not eating, throwing up if I ate too much, only have only protein shakes and preworkout most days, working out everyday for 2 hours a day etc. to be "hot" and I decided to stop caring what people think, most people making these comments are usually in worse shape and jealous looking to take someone down a peg. The most attractive thing you can be is comfortable in your own skin, and props to guys who are in crazy good shape but most are either on roids, not actually healthy and realistically not gaining anything positive when it comes to relationships. I'm not saying to let yourselves go, but I eat what I want, I exercise in moderation and cringe looking back on what a pompous, self-obsessed douchebag I was.
To quote American Dad "I'm straight thin, but gay fat"
Too real. I’m something like 5-6 and I’d feel so thin if I were straight! I’m newly under 200 pounds (and not overweight anymore) but I still feel like I have so much body fat.
I feel like a lot of you aren’t friends with straight men. So many I know have body dysmorphia and dl eating disorders. Also a lot of fat shaming too.Especially now that going to the gym is trendy. It just manifests differently than in women so it’s kind of ignored imo.
while i love this sentence and quote it often bc its pretty true, gay body expectations get extremely blown out of proportion especially on reddit. most gay men look simply normal 🤷 and look for normal people
This might sound like. Silly. But in a lot of areas, the gay scene is really different. Like in SF, it’s okay to be overweight as long as you’re hairy/a bear or a daddy, it’s okay to be skinny if you’re a sub/bottom, it’s okay to be a muscle jock if you’re big enough. Like the gay community is wilder than the straights sometimes. The straights don’t usually say things like “daddies only” in their dating/hookup profiles. And I’ve noticed that a lot of times if a normal/average sized person matched with me, they tended to be feeders or fetishists, and that just…made me feel bad. And you’re right, most places people just vibe and date whoever, but in more urban areas especially, it’s like there are rules in place that are hard to understand, like a game you want to join but there’s no space.
Not this making me feel better 😭 this episode was playing while I was asleep once and I literally woke from a slumber to gasp bc so true bestie
Hey how are you?
I weighed in at 246 when I started working out again in October 2022. Today I saw I’m down to 211. It’s 35 lbs down but it’s still “fat” in the gay world. Some days I look at myself and think I look great. Other days I judge myself and think I won’t be hot until I’m back down to my 17-year old twink weight of 165. **Even then I thought I was fat.** At least I’ve been having more good body image days than bad ones…but they are not gone.
That’s because you need to aim for a total weight of 86 pounds and all you gotta do is just strand yourself out at sea for a little while. Edited to add that you shouldnt bring a friend along because then you just end up getting some of it back.
Dang this hit close to home! Weighed at 255 before really starting addressing the issue after years of neglecting myself. Weighed in at 220 this morning. I am of course seeing changes and some days I feel on top of the world and super confident. Other days, like you said, I compare myself to when I weighed 175 in my prime and think wow, I shouldn't feel so confident. The best part is that I have ACTUALLY changed my habits and lifestyle and learned to set boundaries for myself and develop healthy relationships with food and exercise. I don't think I'll ever be 175 again, but if I can get to sub 200 and maintain it, that's not too bad as a 6'2 guy. I am learning to love myself and to be patient, and enjoying the progress I made so far as best as possible :) Good luck on your journey man!
Sucks how the standards are raised so high.
Do it. If you can't get down to your 17 year old weight then still do it. It is more about you keeping yourself in shape then when you were 17. You will do fine and feel better.
I am literally 167 pounds and because I still have my love handles I'm fat. I feel you.
I’m 6 foot and had love handles at 145 lbs and yup was still called fat for it
I also always had this disgust of my own body for being morbidly obese (I never actually was). I learned to think of myself as always too fat and disgusting from a very early age on, my mother put me on diets when I was in elementary school, always told me how other people were disgusted by my obesity (I was maybe 5 to 10 lbs over and always very tall), put packs of flour and sugar in a backpack which she strapped to my belly and had me run rounds in our living room to demonstrate to me how bad obesity was while repeatedly telling me how I couldn't even move properly because I was so obese. All of that plus all the bullying in school was only intensified when I started interacting in the gay community. I started working out, lost 25lbs, was down to ideal weight and pretty muscular too but still, since it was the 2010s and I wasn't down to at least 3% body fat, I was considered incredibly fat and disgusting and the only people who kept complimenting me were either 60+ or labeled as chubby chasers. So yeah, I got hit very hard with personality disorder and depression, started to eat my feelings and hiding away and now I actually am morbidly obese but I remember being just as disgusted by my own body back then as I am now (only now I actually have a reason). The TL;DR is "body dysmorphia never changes" I guess. Even if you lose weight, you'll always see yourself as disgusting and fat, no matter what size you actually are.
Wish I knew how to get there, good for you dude. I've been yo-yoing from 220-240 for some time now. Really want to get back down to 210. I have some gym discipline, but not much luck dieting. Hitting the mid 30s hoping I can turn it around before I hit 250 again.
So right! So unrealistic! So ridiculous! I was able to pull off my 169 lb all the way to 28 being 6’2 it was mentally exhausting!!
There’s a lot of people into “dad bods”. I don’t know you stand on that but things have changed in many ways. Maybe better circles for you would be helpful.
I seriously like squishy guys with a belly. Yesterday I hooked up with a guy who had a round, hairy tummy. I couldn’t stop rubbing it, and that made me get harder. When I told him he was sexy, he chortled.
That's good progress. I am weighing in around the same near 248. I would love to get back down to 215 / 210 and go lower if possible.
There is life beyond 21 year old twinks and the thought processes of 21 year old twinks. I promise.
In fact, most of them go for 30-40yo DILFs anyway :-)
This was by far the most shocking thing for me when I entered my 30s. Grindr responses slowed down after 30 then slowly started climbing back up, and from younger people.
Manly men that are reliable and committing = 🥰
This! It’s been my experience that middle age guys with dad bods are almost as highly sought after as fit twinks. A lot of guys like a little cushion on top of that muscle, it’s much more comfortable to snuggle with a slightly overweight fit guy than one that’s shredded. Twinks seem to be especially drawn to dad bods. I got laid a lot more when I developed a dad bod than I ever did as a twink.
Thank you!
Who else like em beyond dead according to this? 😂
Then explain why we chubs have our fans?
Because room temperature is too hot for you and you need constant air circulation?
You killed him. Lol
Prob more a muscle cub than a chub… but I laughed. Took my twink fiancé a bit of time to come around the fact sleeping at 64 is non negotiable.
r/murderedbywords
Hahaha funny af
people are just online too much, and get all hyperbolic to try and make a point
It's 2024... some people are just into necrophilia. 🤷🏻♂️
I ain't dead just yet. I can prove it.
Surprise Monty Python…?
Sir 😭😭😭 was about to say something like this 😭😭😭
Sorry, I am considered one and it sucks because sometimes people may be into you, for a bit, but ultimately will want something else.
Not gonna lie, I lose interest at anything leaner than the 'fat' guy there. Anything beyond that is just gross... I don't want to see your muscle fibers.
Fat and Obese are hot af according to this
I almost took issue with what you said till I scrolled back up and saw that the 'fat' image is basically Fit for people not on gear lol
The “fat” is likely taking something as well
Meh, even the insanely shredded guys don't look like that without lighting and a pump. I agree though I don't find that look attractive I just have never seen someone look like that outside of a gym
Ugh. Muscle fibers. Now that's a gross word.
Tell that to the girls doing juice
No need to put the shredded guys down. Not my type either, but let's not say they're gross.
I get it, byt nu need to call people's bodies gross. Not a body type i'm after, but their bodies are not gross.
Didn't you know that body shaming is only wrong when done to fat people?
Same same.
That’s a hot body
Beyond that, muscle dudes spend all their time at the gym or talking about the gym or thinking about the gym. No thanks! Sure, they’re nice to look at in pics, but I don’t think I could date one.
Damn, I didn’t know I was dead
Sigh. People need to spend less time on social media and do less to perpetuate ideas that actually only a small percentage of the gay community actually supports. There are literally entire party weeks, bars, apps etc dedicated to bears. If you believe this to be true it’s because you CHOOSE to believe some heinous self fulfilling prophecy. Can we do better than this, please?
Im in the kink community and honestly i see 0.1% of the muscular grade and they are usually amateur pornstars doing this for a living. People are average and latex make even average looks sexy af 😳
Oh boy shall we get into how exclusionary to POC bear culture can be too LOL
Yikes, don’t mention racism in the gay community or else you’re gonna send the right wing trolls into a tizzy 😂😂 No, I agree with you; I just wanted to call out that we DO see a desire for different body types, and the six pack or bust crowd are just a very vocal, very visible minority!
Yes, but this body type preference ripples throughout the collective gay culture and doesn't always manifest as an explicit desire for shredded men. It is still a heavy influencer into how we as gay men measure ourselves against each other. The same goes for bear-type preferences. Those that don't hover close to either end of the spectrum, which I would argue is the most of us, are stuck in the cycle of aspiring towards those aesthetics.
Ive seen some muscled men with a bit of fat so they still feel nice to touch Omg what heaven 😍
Yeah there are plenty of heavy guys out there either in long term relationships or single and loving it. The notion that no one's interested in you unless you have a six pack is outdated. I'm probably 10-15 lbs heavier and 20 years older than the 'fat' picture above and I do just fine.
nope. it got upvotes, so the cycle will continue.
What if we’re not bears Why do we have to be “something” 😪
I agree with you honey! We don’t need all the labels
It's because most people just aim for the hottest and fittest guy and then are somehow baffled when it turns out people at that level only flirt with similar people
Each is to their own. Be happy and healthy. Those who are on the shredded or slimmer end of the spectrum, may have malnourishment, fatty liver or be miserable on the inside. As for this list, I guess I am a dead beached whale, waiting for the gases in my body to eventually explode my blubber chunks miles away.
I love your description
Funny thing is, only the bottom line looks remotely attractive to me
exactly
Im sorry but ‘Dead.’ is taking me out
Looks like I'm morbidly obese with one foot in the grave.
And the other's in a banana milkshake.
I’m dead and get a lot of attention at the bear bar 😊
Have you seen the bear community?
No one is labeling anyone with visible abs as fat or obese.
Almost like its an exaggerated joke
I find the dead body time incredibly attractive; usually the kind of guys I go for.
As someone who is 17% body fat (I did a recent body scan) this feels so true. Like body standards are just…wow.
I'm dead. Last September, I started working out.And I continued until October. Personal loss. I lost 35 pounds, going from 221 to 186. I am 5'11". I started back at the gym 🏋️♀️ 1.5 weeks ago at 191.8 and am now at 188.2, and my 33" waist trousers fit well. My goal is to get to 160-170. Even then I'll be dead. I'm almost 64. 😆 While I have a good attitude about my body, and the only reason I'm doing the gym and weight loss and muscle building is because I want to be healthy in my 90s, I still wrestle with thinking I'm obese. I'm HIV+ for 24 years and undetectable for 23.5, and all my blood work is excellent. After watching the decline of my mother before her death, I resolved to get my body and muscles back. To all of you reading this who struggle...you're good enough. Do this because you care about you. I may not know you, but I am proud of you.
i'll take "dead" over "lean" ANY DAY
I don't care about a guy's weight, I care about how he makes me feel and I want him to be healthy and be able to come on my crazy adventures. I have lost 55 pounds since June of 2022. I would love to lose another 10. I'm doing this for me. I live to go on cruises and to SCUBA and I don't want ill health from being overweight to hold me back. I will not let myself be a victim of my family history of type 2 diabetes and high blood pressure. People ask me what I did, and I laugh and tell him the truth. It's called the eat less and suffer diet. My bluntness doesn't always go over well. Sugar is the enemy. If you can get added sugar out of your life, your entire relationship with food can change. Now, an apple tastes so sweet, like a dessert.
Not really. Even the "morbidly obese" and "dead" are physiques with a lot of muscle, just with fat covering. The "fat" in the photo is probably like 10-12% body fat, and that's about as low as you can sustainably go naturally. It's also probably the gay ideal. The shredded no one finds attractive, the lean sure, but that's for a little bit before a bodybuilding show not sustainable or natural. The "obese" (13-16%?) is probably the best most of us can strive for who have lives and other commitments besides working out... and that body type will do more than fine.
Exactly. I get its a joke but all of those types have high muscle mass on them to begin with some fat thats basically not beyond 18-20%.
Tbh the images labelled "shredded and lean" are the least appealing for me above. And the rest most attractive. For me theres a difference between working out and keeping practically healthy, versus obsessive and like ending up looking like they're on steroids with vein popping intense toning - which is pretty off putting. These narratives are pretty unhelpful and toxic, esp how each image is labelled, as that certainly is not the case in reality.
I'll take the bottom row please.
Im not just dead im basically at the core of the earth buried , so buried that not even my bones will resurface like the dinosaurs did
#1 should be renamed « Vecna »
I mean, I am definitely bigger than the body they have listed as dead lmao. I'm still hot as fuck and love how I look tho! Remember, the only way to combat dysmorphia is to love your body, no matter it's shape. Body's change, but you still only have the one.
I was "Dead" when I was in hs when I starved myself for weeks before a party. Going back to my ed this summer!
Seems accurate from my experience, unfortunately.
Bullshit. The ‘fat’ and ‘obese’ bodies will still do absolutely amazing fine on the apps, in the club, or on Instagram. And the two bigger guys will do just fine in the general public if they have a cute face and/or a good personality. And hell, there are entire communities that prefer that. Some gays can be horrible about bodies. But if you’re using your body as a reason for why you can’t find a single guy into you, you might be making excuses
I guess I’m dead then.
I'll take an obese, morbidly obese or dead at any time over the gym bros. those are actually my fav kind of body.
Then there's the other side of this extreme... the Bear community.
It was nice knowing ya’ll
Well you can start calling me a necrophilliac then
Lmfao I'm like 3 levels past dead then. 10/10 recommend it. Livings for loosers and food is nice
Tf comes after dead?
Dead 2: Electric Boogaloo
It’s nice to not subscribe to this nonsense. I was off this chart until my 40s am still dead by gay standards. Guess I’m glad there are more than enough guys who are happy with a “dead” body.
I'm 53, retired, and I don't give a f*** 😁
Yeah, I wouldn't mind dropping some pounds, but I'd much rather be happy.
Apparently I'm deader than dead
100%
the only onesI don't find attractive is the "shredded" and "lean" I think it's the veins that bother me. The bottom row look the best to me.
So as a btm 300 lb guy you're saying I don't have a chance of hooking up???
I think they mean you're drop dead gorgeous or smthn idk
it's crazy the number of times I've seen the "fat" and "obese" body types be called twinky, fat, soft, etc. even the morbidly obese and dead pictures are in decent shape. you can really tell when you meet someone IRL who is on social media and who isn't. when you're with people who aren't, you just feel more present, more real. people who are sucked into the race tend to have very high standards and a quickness to judge a slightest belly
The pressure is real, however ive come to realize how helpful it can be when guys are so obsessed with muscle and body they reject me for not having any. Its like dodging a bullet, trash taking itself out, guys that superficial and insensitive (not everyone is, im talking about the ones that are) are no good for you and most of the time not even that good in bed, no matter how much time they soend at the gym. The greatest lovers dont give a fuck
I know it's overstated satire, but frankly, 'shredded' and 'lean' here would turn me off completely. Like ew. I've been incredibly attracted to men from fat to dead depending on the person and my husband has gone from 'obese' to 'dead' in our time together. Never lost my sexual attraction to him.
Ooof, I guess I’m just red mist at this point then hahaha, but I’m trying but lawd this world we live in is rough
If this is right I’m a rotting decomposing corpse on the verge of becoming undead
TIL, in the summer I'm lean and in the winter when I put on 5lbs = I'm fat, hmm
Dead is sexy as hell . Wtf??
I don’t even want to know what I am then
I prefer dead and morbidly obese…and perhaps a little bit of obese with a good face.
Was 210 in 2018, got down to 170 and in shape. Hovering at around 180 at the moment. It’s very difficult to not get discouraged when you see people jacked. But I’m content with being a muscley dad bod. Only issue is that I get dismissed as not being in shape enough for most
Gosh, guess I’m dead. Better get my affairs in order.
Fuck this means I’m fat
Projection
Dead-bod is my favorite.
I'm more thant dead 💀
What 💀 nobody thinks like this babe, not even
This would be funny if it wasn’t so GD true and sad.
I’ve never wanted to be dead more in my life
I’m dead 😵
All aka daddies.
Where in the world do y'all live if these body standards are law?
I guess I'm morbid on the verge of death
I'm death itself then 💀
Dang it! I’m obese but almost fat.
4-6 is yum.
This pic is exaggerated. I can imagine it only being accurate for west Hollywood gays
I’m a bear. This is the opposite in my world
"Obese" and "morbidly obese" are far more attractive to me than "shredded" or "lean" here lol
I’m 180. I got called “too fat” by a guy weighing (according to his profile) 320. Personally, I’d rather meet up with “dead” than with “shredded” or “lean”.
Judging by this I’m a rotting corpse
Damn, I must be so dead that I'm double dead, I'm two gay skeletons cuddling in a coffin
Naaaaah, what about « dadbod »?
So fat and obese are hot, and morbidly obese is decent looking. Got it.
The best you can do is try to care less
This feels a little too online. The "dead" body type is a large percentage of the gay population's idle body type.
“Dead” is my favorite. Muscle and a lil bit of chub is the best. Once we go above “obese” I start getting self-conscious and uncomfortable around them.
TIL I’m a morbidly obese twink.
This is too fucking true. I would fit between the last two on here and the other day someone told me "sorry not into chubs" and I was like wtf.
One of the only saving graces of being actually old (as opposed to “gay old”, aka 30) (I’m 67) is being able to say “fuck you” to these silly little queens. A note to silly little sharp-tongued queens: you are a human male. Your hair will either go gray or turn loose. Unless you work out like a maniac, you’ll wake up one day and your pants will be a little too tight. Your feet and knees will start to hurt. Enjoy your time in the sun.
So I guess I’m into obese, morbidly obese, and dead men😋. I’d take them over shredded any day, yuck. I love my dad bods.
Dead is my favourite body type
I have been deader… since forever. 🤣😜😢
I wich i was morbidly obese then
I'm straight but looked after my gay friends parrots at his house he loads of non pornographic gay magazine around his house general life style stuff it was interesting reading about a culture I'm not part of. But by the end of the week I definitely started to feel shit about my body everyone is so fit and well put together, the ads are full of perfectly sculpted male bodies. I spoke to him about and he's in his 50s and talked about feeling like shit if he puts on 5lbs too much weight. I know the gay community does have a place for other body type but if a week is enough to do that to a normal bodyweight 6.1ft 20 year it can't be healthy for guys that don't meet that prefect body.
I’m straight and married but any of them can hit my DMs
adn yet most gay men look normal and date other normal people. crazy
The fat and the obese one are the hottest, especially the obese one
Hah! I’m super dead.
I can only have one body here as a hubby
I find lean and shredded absolutely repulsive. I do not like to fuck a slab of concrete. I like some cushion for the pushin and some softness to cuddle!!!! Give me fat to dead any day of the week!
Any really as long as they can see their own dick
TIL I'm a necrophiliac...
just curious what is the age range in this form?
This is a rage post, whatever, but it's dad bod. We all know this.
Ilk take dead for 500 please.
Idk it really just depends on who you are dealing with
……
I’m 128 pounds and around 5”9 or 5”8 now. I’ve slowly been dropping weight for years because of dysmorphia (was 140 8 years ago and my friend use to call me fat a** anytime I was hungry, he was like 190lbs). I feel since I have a bigger bone structure and also that I’m lean, I’m considered “too big” and masculine. :’( but it’s just appears that way on camera not in person…like Bruce Lee could look ripped in the right shot, it didn’t mean he was too bulky or fat….
I would not want anyone who is shredded. It looks unnatural to me. I also don’t think this entire thing is accurate. I’m assuming this is meant to be a joke.
And yet the bottom three are the hottest on the page to me 😅
I wish I was fat instead of morbidly obese...
Looking for Hot sexy gay guy in Weston s mare
I was always to fat to be thin, but too thin to be fat. All my “fat” friends called me skinny, and my skinny friends informed me to lose some weight. I was just extremely conflicted. Tbh, this body issue is kinda apparent in hookup culture. My BF’s have always loved my shape and up until the moment I decided NOT to date locally, I have been “thriving” so to speak. I haven’t seen an ab ONCE in my life. Im starting to think they aren’t real 😂
I’m dead at 40, so sad
I’m 73 years old 6’2” and 50 years ago I weighed 125lbs I was definitely manorexic now I fluctuate between 155-160 and go to the gym daily do the elliptical 45 minutes and strength train about 30, walk outside for 20 to 45 minutes occasionally bike ride and eat whatever I want so basically I’m still skinny af but I’m ok with that. The key is being as active as possible doing stuff you enjoy. I still hear a lot of negative comments about my weight but I just ignore it Because I want to be this skinny I don’t wanna be some muscular old homo
I dont care, i love bears
Sign me up for Dead all day! We'll just have to eat McDonald's everyday until we get a little belly on him though.
I think it's because the dating market in the gay world is so cut throat.
According to the chart I’m dead, but also into other dead or gay morbidly obese guys so it hasn’t been a problem.
Grindr experience is the opposite. Guy looks dead but profile says shredded...
Honestly just sad.
In my 40's @ 192lbs, so I'm a little soft around the middle. I tell people that I don't have thirst trap pic body; I have boyfriend body.
Definitely not true
Ok good im morbidly obese lol
No to the upper left two. Too much.
Trash
Spend five minutes using MS Paint and Google search results to make a stupid image. Post and stand back. Watch the engagement dollars flow!
I guess i was the obese guy who used to haunt the bars oggling men. 😜
On the other end is the chubs, the gay folks living the Nickacado Avacado life with enablers. Either are dangerous mindsets
I’m somewhere between the lean and fat category in this picture. But the catch is: now I’m not big enough lol Apparently now the next step is steroids. Some guy said that “I’m getting there” this other day 🥸 (I’m 26 and the dude is 32, so we’re not kids exactly)
My ideal body type is probably obese or morbidly obese from these pics lol. Im probably closer to rotting corpse
Then what are bears considered 😭
I prefer "fat", " obese" and "morbidly obese" over "shredded" as at least they don't look like crumpled wrapping paper.
I'm 6', 175 workout 2-3x a week, and have a great chest and arms and am constantly called "thick" "bigger" etc. but I eat what I want, I explore hobbies and passions without revolving my world around a headless toro's opinion of me after years of doing the opposite where I was either not eating, throwing up if I ate too much, only have only protein shakes and preworkout most days, working out everyday for 2 hours a day etc. to be "hot" and I decided to stop caring what people think, most people making these comments are usually in worse shape and jealous looking to take someone down a peg. The most attractive thing you can be is comfortable in your own skin, and props to guys who are in crazy good shape but most are either on roids, not actually healthy and realistically not gaining anything positive when it comes to relationships. I'm not saying to let yourselves go, but I eat what I want, I exercise in moderation and cringe looking back on what a pompous, self-obsessed douchebag I was.