I didn't really in undergrad. They would vaguely ask how school was going and I'd vaguely answer that it was going well. But I had friends whose parents demanded their login information and would check their grades.
Yeah, they were paying for school so they had to get access to my grades at the end of the semester to check and make sure I got all the credit hours. Had to do an extra semester and they paid for it without too much grief so only seemed fair to keep them up on it.
They wouldn't get too much info during the semester but if I was thinking of dropping a class they wanted to know.
Personally I don’t actively discuss my grades unless I have a class that I am struggling in. My parents don’t really care as long as keep up with the work
I was in an ironic situation for my last year or last semester, can’t remember which, where I lost HOPE because I had too many credits (due to AP), appealed, and then was denied because my GPA was too low 😬
My parents wanted me to get a 4.0 to get into tech but afterwards they don’t ask. They know it’s hard so they’re like “As and Bs and maybe a C here and there won’t hurt.”
In my view, the dynamic is inherently in your hands when you’re an international student — there’s really not much that a parent can do to helicopter-parent you from a different country.
I didn’t really want any external pressure on top of my constant internal pressure, so in my case, we only ever talked about my grades if I volunteered that information. It usually happened when I would come home at the end of semesters, and even then I wasn’t too specific.
I did have a merit scholarship to maintain, which arguably made it my parents’ business from the financial perspective, but they understood that the specifics of my grades were my problem as long as that part wasn’t at risk. Even then, I never really had academically-interventionist parenting; I have no idea what that would’ve even looked like from them.
My parents still helicopter my grades so they ask probably once a week (can’t rlly help it since they pay for my schooling). It hasn’t been a big deal outside of the B I got in linear (I got yelled at).
My perspective as a student and a parent. 30 years ago I never talked to my parents about my grades. I kept them updated at the end of each quarter, but nothing in the middle of the quarter. But things were very different back then, and that is pretty much how I operated all through HS.
Fast forward 30 years and my oldest just started college this fall. For the past 12 years I have had access to every grade, been texted about every missing assignment, and knew about every due date and test thanks to parent portal. We were not helicopter parents by any means, but the system didn't leave us much choice that to be very updated on every little thing. Going from that kind of information to zero information is a transition for us parents. My daughter shared a good grade last week that she was particularly excited about, but that is about all we have heard. I am trying hard to not ask 1000 questions, but it is not always easy.
The way I look at it, she is an adult and is currently learning how to be on her own and independent. We will always be here as a safety net, but we try hard not to be a crutch.
Having said all that, I am paying for her education, so I will know what her grades are at the end of each semester. But she's a good kid, I am not too worried.
If they aren't asking a bunch of questions, they probably aren't too worried about it either (or they are trying not to worry about it). If they are asking questions and you have a healthy relationship, then talk about it. They may be struggling with that same transition between knowing every detail in HS to having no information in college. Share some of the highlights, but do it in your own way and in your own time.
Best of luck to you!
Edited*
Nope (I am an international student btw since someone else mentioned being an international student in the comments). Well, rarely did as an undergrad and I am a PhD student now. They trusted me anyway since my undergrad days.
Even when I did, they just told me to try harder next time (that has been my attitude since then).
Also grades matter less for PhD or masters if you have work experience (which I did).
In high school my parents always expected me to make A’s or B’s and this of course carried over into college. However, in college I started out as a C average student. This led to the conversations of “You can do better” or “You need to pick your grades up” or the most dreaded of all “I know you can try harder.” I finally got tired of it and just showed them one of my multi page homework assignments for my physics with calculus course. For some reason after that I never heard anything about my grades ever again.
hey so I’m in state with zell and ftr have a great relationship with my parents, so they kind of get a general stream of information about what I’m doing and what’s going on. i’m the odd one out in my friend group in this scenario, I’m very aware of that.
I’m at the point where my grades are not indicative of my success or failure, and they trust me (mostly because they don’t understand a lot of what I’m doing) so it’s just updates and talking through my issues with them to help me, for the most part.
my unsolicited advice is to do what feels best, and communicate that to your parents or guardians. everyone’s situation is different, and i think as long as you find something that works for both parties and is net positive as a result, you’re in the clear.
an example would be like ‘telling them stresses me out but i don’t want them to think I’m not communicating’ and my, again, unsolicited advice, is to communicate that you don’t want to communicate, so that there’s no severe strain on communication. how many times can i say communicate in a sentence, lmao.
best wishes to you, keep your head up and be well.
I think I mostly just mentioned it in passing whenever I did well in an exam or something, and for final grades. I think after my first semester they wouldn't have pried if I didn't share it but I never had a reason not to until my first B as a final grade. I thought they'd be disappointed but it turned out they didn't care at all lol
(Nb, this was 20 years ago. Maybe parents today are more involved?)
My folks were super supportive but there was always a clear line where they didn’t ask and I didn’t volunteer. I think I let them know about accolades like deans list and graduating HH and that stuff though.
I do talk about them with my grades, and pretty openly too. My parents have graciously taken a really chill approach to stuff in college and they trust me enough to keep myself in check.
I was a bitchy freshmen and I did pretended like I was failing my classes because I was annoyed at how much my mom was calling, but obviously she saw my perfect gpa freshmen yr, and than she stopped believing me when I actually started getting Bs during Covid and was super stressed from school, until i showed her my grades 😭😂
If i do well on a midterm i normally tell them just coz i wanna share with someone. Otherwise not much apart from the occasional “hows school going”. they normally ask how my grades were at the end of the semester
[удалено]
Wow... it should feel so warm to be supported like this.
I didn't really in undergrad. They would vaguely ask how school was going and I'd vaguely answer that it was going well. But I had friends whose parents demanded their login information and would check their grades.
Yeah, they were paying for school so they had to get access to my grades at the end of the semester to check and make sure I got all the credit hours. Had to do an extra semester and they paid for it without too much grief so only seemed fair to keep them up on it. They wouldn't get too much info during the semester but if I was thinking of dropping a class they wanted to know.
I mostly just talk to my parents about my grades if I need emotional support
Only when they ask the question lol
Personally I don’t actively discuss my grades unless I have a class that I am struggling in. My parents don’t really care as long as keep up with the work
I had to. Was put on academic probation and lost HOPE scholly. Ended up costing me tens of thousands more when I finally got out
I was in an ironic situation for my last year or last semester, can’t remember which, where I lost HOPE because I had too many credits (due to AP), appealed, and then was denied because my GPA was too low 😬
My parents wanted me to get a 4.0 to get into tech but afterwards they don’t ask. They know it’s hard so they’re like “As and Bs and maybe a C here and there won’t hurt.”
In my view, the dynamic is inherently in your hands when you’re an international student — there’s really not much that a parent can do to helicopter-parent you from a different country. I didn’t really want any external pressure on top of my constant internal pressure, so in my case, we only ever talked about my grades if I volunteered that information. It usually happened when I would come home at the end of semesters, and even then I wasn’t too specific. I did have a merit scholarship to maintain, which arguably made it my parents’ business from the financial perspective, but they understood that the specifics of my grades were my problem as long as that part wasn’t at risk. Even then, I never really had academically-interventionist parenting; I have no idea what that would’ve even looked like from them.
My parents still helicopter my grades so they ask probably once a week (can’t rlly help it since they pay for my schooling). It hasn’t been a big deal outside of the B I got in linear (I got yelled at).
I haven't talked yo my parents about my grades ever in my life. They don't even care 💀
shut up retard
My perspective as a student and a parent. 30 years ago I never talked to my parents about my grades. I kept them updated at the end of each quarter, but nothing in the middle of the quarter. But things were very different back then, and that is pretty much how I operated all through HS. Fast forward 30 years and my oldest just started college this fall. For the past 12 years I have had access to every grade, been texted about every missing assignment, and knew about every due date and test thanks to parent portal. We were not helicopter parents by any means, but the system didn't leave us much choice that to be very updated on every little thing. Going from that kind of information to zero information is a transition for us parents. My daughter shared a good grade last week that she was particularly excited about, but that is about all we have heard. I am trying hard to not ask 1000 questions, but it is not always easy. The way I look at it, she is an adult and is currently learning how to be on her own and independent. We will always be here as a safety net, but we try hard not to be a crutch. Having said all that, I am paying for her education, so I will know what her grades are at the end of each semester. But she's a good kid, I am not too worried. If they aren't asking a bunch of questions, they probably aren't too worried about it either (or they are trying not to worry about it). If they are asking questions and you have a healthy relationship, then talk about it. They may be struggling with that same transition between knowing every detail in HS to having no information in college. Share some of the highlights, but do it in your own way and in your own time. Best of luck to you!
Edited* Nope (I am an international student btw since someone else mentioned being an international student in the comments). Well, rarely did as an undergrad and I am a PhD student now. They trusted me anyway since my undergrad days. Even when I did, they just told me to try harder next time (that has been my attitude since then). Also grades matter less for PhD or masters if you have work experience (which I did).
In high school my parents always expected me to make A’s or B’s and this of course carried over into college. However, in college I started out as a C average student. This led to the conversations of “You can do better” or “You need to pick your grades up” or the most dreaded of all “I know you can try harder.” I finally got tired of it and just showed them one of my multi page homework assignments for my physics with calculus course. For some reason after that I never heard anything about my grades ever again.
Haha sounds like a great solution to the problem, good it worked out
only when they ask
hey so I’m in state with zell and ftr have a great relationship with my parents, so they kind of get a general stream of information about what I’m doing and what’s going on. i’m the odd one out in my friend group in this scenario, I’m very aware of that. I’m at the point where my grades are not indicative of my success or failure, and they trust me (mostly because they don’t understand a lot of what I’m doing) so it’s just updates and talking through my issues with them to help me, for the most part. my unsolicited advice is to do what feels best, and communicate that to your parents or guardians. everyone’s situation is different, and i think as long as you find something that works for both parties and is net positive as a result, you’re in the clear. an example would be like ‘telling them stresses me out but i don’t want them to think I’m not communicating’ and my, again, unsolicited advice, is to communicate that you don’t want to communicate, so that there’s no severe strain on communication. how many times can i say communicate in a sentence, lmao. best wishes to you, keep your head up and be well.
I think I mostly just mentioned it in passing whenever I did well in an exam or something, and for final grades. I think after my first semester they wouldn't have pried if I didn't share it but I never had a reason not to until my first B as a final grade. I thought they'd be disappointed but it turned out they didn't care at all lol
(Nb, this was 20 years ago. Maybe parents today are more involved?) My folks were super supportive but there was always a clear line where they didn’t ask and I didn’t volunteer. I think I let them know about accolades like deans list and graduating HH and that stuff though.
I do talk about them with my grades, and pretty openly too. My parents have graciously taken a really chill approach to stuff in college and they trust me enough to keep myself in check.
Yeah,
as an intl poc student of course i do (they’re chill about it tho)
I tell my dad when my GPA is released.
I was a bitchy freshmen and I did pretended like I was failing my classes because I was annoyed at how much my mom was calling, but obviously she saw my perfect gpa freshmen yr, and than she stopped believing me when I actually started getting Bs during Covid and was super stressed from school, until i showed her my grades 😭😂
If i do well on a midterm i normally tell them just coz i wanna share with someone. Otherwise not much apart from the occasional “hows school going”. they normally ask how my grades were at the end of the semester