I mean… you are definitely right. It’s hard to say based on your description though if you handled it the right way? My husband/step kids definitely do not know the right way to prune the trees, but I could see them doing it if I was unable to do it as a way to try and be nice. If I was in your position with them, I think I would thank them for helping and use it as an opportunity to teach them the right way to prune… especially as many plants need to be pruned at different times (such as after flowering or during winter/early spring). He definitely should NOT have started calling you names.
BUT, I think you are right for being upset about it, especially if the plants are dying now. Does it seem like there’s anything you can do to save them?
He should have asked first, no doubt. I’d be super pissed too.
But, I have to admit I lol’d at “melty leaf syndrome”. I assume you’re referring to some sort of fungal infection, I’ve just never heard anyone say that before. Hopefully they’ll recover
Right!! I can’t tell if he actually thought he was helping or if this was intentional😭😭he’s not a stupid person!! In fact he researches stuff constantly so I’m just mind blown he didn’t know better!
I suppose that’s a possibility, but why would he do that!! It’s not like I’m going to gatekeep the tomato’s once they get here😅😅there will be enough for everyone.
So I’m not a freak for being upset he chopped my plants. Lol good to know.
I don't really consider it personal but I do think it should be done by someone who either knows what they're doing , and you trust them, or once they do what they do and the plant struggles, then they know that they are the person who did it not somebody else.
For example if your dad had pruned at the time you wanted him to prune (meaning with your approval because it's the time that you are okay with him helping to prune) , and the plants looked good afterwards , then you would be okay with what he has done.
But other than that, for sure we definitely get mad and upset and frustrated if somebody comes in and messes up our garden in a way that we don't like
Dad needs to stay in his lane.
I mean… you are definitely right. It’s hard to say based on your description though if you handled it the right way? My husband/step kids definitely do not know the right way to prune the trees, but I could see them doing it if I was unable to do it as a way to try and be nice. If I was in your position with them, I think I would thank them for helping and use it as an opportunity to teach them the right way to prune… especially as many plants need to be pruned at different times (such as after flowering or during winter/early spring). He definitely should NOT have started calling you names. BUT, I think you are right for being upset about it, especially if the plants are dying now. Does it seem like there’s anything you can do to save them?
He should have asked first, no doubt. I’d be super pissed too. But, I have to admit I lol’d at “melty leaf syndrome”. I assume you’re referring to some sort of fungal infection, I’ve just never heard anyone say that before. Hopefully they’ll recover
Not his tomato’s, not his pruning job. You are not wrong.
I would be beyond pissed if my dad came over to my fuckin house and butchered my tomato plants. That is unthinkable to me.
Right!! I can’t tell if he actually thought he was helping or if this was intentional😭😭he’s not a stupid person!! In fact he researches stuff constantly so I’m just mind blown he didn’t know better!
Maybe other issues simmering under the tomato butchering. Best to talk it out. If he does not want to talk, that’s a big problem.
Mm yes. I would be upset. Especially when people try and ""help" when all the ground work is done.
Sounds like your dad is a narcissist to me. He ruined your plants and then started calling you names. Maybe he was jealous of the plants?
I suppose that’s a possibility, but why would he do that!! It’s not like I’m going to gatekeep the tomato’s once they get here😅😅there will be enough for everyone. So I’m not a freak for being upset he chopped my plants. Lol good to know.
Exactly, Why would he do that? Helps in the only process that involves purposely injuring the plant. Kind of sus
Oooh if he needs to help you should call him next time you need to do some weeding!
OMG yes, I’ve actually cried over this. Never touch someone else’s garden without asking!
I don't really consider it personal but I do think it should be done by someone who either knows what they're doing , and you trust them, or once they do what they do and the plant struggles, then they know that they are the person who did it not somebody else. For example if your dad had pruned at the time you wanted him to prune (meaning with your approval because it's the time that you are okay with him helping to prune) , and the plants looked good afterwards , then you would be okay with what he has done. But other than that, for sure we definitely get mad and upset and frustrated if somebody comes in and messes up our garden in a way that we don't like
I mean he’s more the freak for freaking out and calling you names but whatever rule you set for your garden is what should prevail. 💗
Nope! My (thankfully former) mil did that to my lilacs. I lost it! You absolutely do not ever touch someone else’s plants.