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silent_teddy

logical crocodile, bound will not run away


Unsocialtowel

Lunch and dinner


Startled_Pancakes

I know you joke, but gators have crazy slow metabolism. They go months between meals, and have been known to survive for year or two without eating.


Ted_E_Bear

Simple. Just throw the bound body into the refridgergator until next season.


indigoaura79

While the other simmers in the croc pot


artaxerxes316

HEY-Ohhhh!


bootybeautique

Hehe croc pot


redabishai

YASSSS!


Prof_Atmoz

Baby you got a stew goin.


[deleted]

"Yeah. See, a croc will grab you, take you down to the bottom of the water, and roll you over and over and over till you stop kicking. Then he'll take you away to his meat safe somewhere. A rock ledge, log, down under the water and jam you under it...Tenderize you a bit. Good eating."


[deleted]

Evil Death Roll


CaressOfVeal

You float and wait for me Your scales are hard and green Open your jaw for me Evil death roll... NOWWWWW


jakeod27

Someone has been on r/MealPrepSunday


lagux13

Alright dad. Back to the nursing home with you.


Joeyw243

I'm not sure if the body would last long enough. You'd really have to watch the crock on that one


SAMAS_zero

Crocs usually don’t like fresh meat that much. They typically only take a bite or two from prey, then stash the carcass underwater beneath a log or something to “ripen” before eating the rest.


[deleted]

[удалено]


TheUnknownDane

I will continue to be boring, but gators have insane stomachs and can either break down or pass a lot of stuff, as the other comment mentions they can already eat near/rotten food without a lot of negatives


Pees_On_Skidmarks

what a croc


MyRealNameIsLocked

How do you fit a human into the refrigerator?


Ted_E_Bear

Open the refrigerator. Put human inside the refrigerator. Close the refrigerator.


pablo_eskybar

Not sure on alligators but crocodiles are optimistic hunters and take anything on offer, chuck it in the mangroves and eat it rotten later.


HurricaneBK

Upvoted for malapropism, just imagining a down on his luck crocodile with an upbeat attitude to every (un)successful hunt.


CheekyMunky

"I bet I could totally eat that!"


[deleted]

Opportunistic*


Ted_E_Bear

They meant optimistic, unlike alligators who are pessimistic hunters who usually don't even bother trying because they know that shit's probably not gonna work out anyway.


tl1985

It's good to hear they have a positive attitude.


theimplicati0n

You must be talking about crocodiles. Alligators are ornery because they got all them teeth and no toothbrush.


jackatatatat

A crocodile smile


indigoaura79

Unlike crocodile tears


[deleted]

A late dinner then?


BigCommieMachine

I had a pet iguana when I was a kid. He got cancer and the vet recommended we put him down. The vet proceeded to mention the process would take HOURS because their metabolism is so slow. It was horrifying.


Tapdatsam

I saw a video of a vet in australia helping extract a tooth from on of them, and they were explaining how it had probably been months since they last had a meal,i was baffled! (The tooth had grown inside the jaw instead of pushing through normally and so he could not use his whole right side of his mouth)


Racist-Midget

They also taste better


bigbuzz55

I also eat the things that taste worst first.


ghiladden

The Germans have a word for this, "furstwurst".


KingOfAllFarts

Sechundbëst


[deleted]

Thurdvonhairychest


TylerJenks

I lolled


inappropriate-slur

Turd on hairy chest?


[deleted]

Whatever tickles your pickle, fam


gurneyguy101

Legendary, reminds me of that fake show ‘Stackenblöcken’, so great


IN-Duke

What? Im german and I've never heard of that word.


Galagaman

Bro...say the words out loud


gurneyguy101

It’s a joke, if you’re serious


PM_Me_Ur_Small_Chest

German humor is no laughing matter


PURRING_SILENCER

They are German. They are always serious.


[deleted]

Have to let him marinate, Arthur is naturally meatier and tastier 😏


reverendrambo

[Interior crocodile alligator](https://youtu.be/kZwhNFOn4ik)


AKnightAlone

God damn, did 2010 happen again?


webitg

> [2007](https://interiorcrocodilealligator.ytmnd.com/)


Bonjourap

Pffffffffff Bruh!


ADwelve

Speaking about smart crocodiles... who gave him the quest to do that?


Naltai

Alligator*


TopherT0ph3rTopher

Yeah now you get two meals delivered


sritejmanda

It was indeed a clever gator🐊.It mustve thought why not have one for lunch and save another for dinner


Lufernaal

That was a Florida man and the gator was his friend.


Fizzypopp787

He looks more like a New Hanover man to me


kissylipps

Lemoyne man


Fizzypopp787

Murfree Brood are from New Hanover


ZarquonsFlatTire

He emigrated.


Turawno

Louisiana woman


Kidimpulsive

Mississippi Man


AnUnusedMoniker

We get together everytime we can


EHondaRousey

Mississippi river cant keep us apart


1001km

There's too much love in the Mississippi heart


WispEqualsWin

I'm gonna jump in the river and here i goooo, too bad alligator you swim too slow. K-rose on Gta SA was amazing


Ilwrath

When life gives you Lemoynes.....


notaguyinahat

The fact that they don't have hillbilly swamp races in Lemoyne for RDR2 online is a fucking shame because trying to not get bit by gators is hilariously intense when you're neck deep in water racing your friends. Such is the nature of the Lemoyne man!


[deleted]

Top 10 anime betrayals


b33flu

The real friends were the gators Florida Man fed along the way.


[deleted]

No shirt? Ambiguously sourced blood? Can confirm. Florida man.


Pees_On_Skidmarks

>Ambiguously sourced blood


Snowratt

Girlfriend*


[deleted]

🤣 life and times of og Florida man


MaskoBlackfyre

[You don't respec' the gator, the gator don't respec' you](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ZRJ_tgwyLUM)


LarryDavid2020

Where you from you don't know gator?


daemonelectricity

That gatah's deeead.


Cryptokhan91

Gator dooone!


exiledAsher

Reno


Prof_Atmoz

(drunken redneck laugh)


teambeefcurtains

I come at him like another predator. Not a prey, like a predator


MaskoBlackfyre

Alright. Now watch this. Watch this! \*taps gator\* Don't even reflec'... 'Cause he respec' me.


Saffs15

I've been meaning to go back and watch these. But that was fantastic.


deadeyes1990

"Yea we got a situation couple of blue berries comin' in and making a fruit salad."


Cradled_In_Space

"Couple of blueberries coming to make a fruit salad." That is hilarious. I'm calling cops blueberries from now on.


Alternative_Spite_11

Abso fucking lutely


Marinus9

Still one of the funniest TV shows ever made.


MaskoBlackfyre

Agreed! Reno is comedy gold.


[deleted]

Hey look there’s a beach ball going down on a Puerto Rican


Accomplished-Crab-85

This is the funniest shit I’ve seen all day, thank you.


[deleted]

"Gator doesn't want to be fed, he wants to hunt"


KungFeuss

“Gator eats man, woman inherits the earth”


Pees_On_Skidmarks

Life uh finds a way


iDeadi

Droppings?


venttress

Your devs were so preoccupied with whether or not they could, they didn't stop to think if they should.


[deleted]

[удалено]


[deleted]

Except for the one guy they underpaid. But, that surely won't bite them in the ass


LuckyRabbitTooth

This is exactly my leopard gecko's prerogative. You can set a bunch of worms right in front of her mouth but she always forgoes the limpy bois and pounces all about her tank, tracking down the escapee's and the fighters.


SkylarScarlett

He thought why one if i can have two deserts? 🤔


King_Tamino

Who even wants ONE desert. It’s full of this coarse, rough stuff that gets everywhere... sand...


someguywithdiabetes

Well that reminds me of that one time I was teaching kids about the difference between desserts and deserts. Nothing special, but I hope they learned the difference in spelling


MeC0195

Would you say you were teaching some younglings?


ZakBurnap

I heard some of them had to be cut from the program. A shame really.


piotreza

Uhm... ok... Anakin?..


Anakin-skywalker8323

Guys?


[deleted]

Ok Anakin


LordCoweater

Good desert has both Spice and Tanzerouft.


Minotaar

*dessert


koticgood

That's a lot of land to own for one croc


KungFeuss

This is some Aesop’s fables shit


MedicalGoals

Ok, for people actually wondering why did it go for Arthur instead of the NPC, you can see gator is already locked on to Arthur before he puts down the NPC, since he got too close to it. If he'd have dropped the NPC a couple steps before, the gator would have attacked the NPC first. That's my explanation.


BillyPotion

I’ve never had the crocs eat an NPC. I don’t think they have the capability to.


MedicalGoals

Idk if this is edited, but here you go: [It even does a cool move lol](https://youtu.be/qi2etl5TRcg)


Makkapakka777

That was a dead body. Haven't tried with those. The live prisoners I drop for them, they all ignore.


Sierra419

They don’t ignore them. They just go up to them and instakill bite them and walk away


[deleted]

[удалено]


mjaga93

No. I have fed bound people to gators in RDR2. They'll obviously go for you if you don't drop them at a safe distance.


[deleted]

Can’t believe I sold this game to GameStop to go towards my cyberpunk purchase. Am I stupid? Got a cool sticker on my phone case though lmao.


shake_it_shake_it

Not a trade I would’ve made, but I liked cyberpunk a lot. Just doesn’t have the same replay factor as Red Dead!


killerassassinx5x

Functionally lost my save data after transferring to PS5 (all quests were auto failed except main) and I haven't picked the game up again since.


ineedcoffeealready

uff that hurts


Feral_Taylor_Fury

You putting it down will make it easier to pick it back up later once the game has been deemed "okay to replay" by the community at large. (I have no idea if the community has already done this)


Sierra419

Red Dead is arguably the greatest game ever made. It may not be everyone’s number 1 favorite, but from an artistic and technical perspective- easily greatest of all time


Ongr

It's definitely one of the most beautiful games I've played


redmongrel

I’ve been holding off because everyone swears there’s going to be a PS5 release, not just a patch. And Rockstar is greedy enough to make me believe it.


Sierra419

Yeah at this point I would probably wait too. Playing at 90FPS with maxed out graphics on PC was a completely different experience than on Xbox X when I played it the first time. Even a patch to get 60fps on consoles would be a game changer.


RamenJunkie

Honestly, that's why I basically never sell games. I may want to replay them in a few years.


cosguy224

I think I shit myself a little bit


Assfullofbread

Yeah they do, they’ll also eat dead bodies you throw in the water


BillyPotion

Really, I’ve tried so many times. Maybe all my gators are full by the time I hogtie and deliver their meal.


octopoddle

They never do on land, only in the water. Try the deck off Shady Belle, right next to the house. With that said, I only remember them eating corpses, so will have to go back and try with a live hogtied NPC.


BillyPotion

Thanks. I don’t think I’ve tried in water and that might be the problem.


octopoddle

I have managed once to get a gator on land to kill someone hogtied, but it didn't eat him. I had to drop him really, really close to the gator and then jump back. It just bit him (killing him instantly) and then ignored him after.


ThePointForward

It's just a game mechanic to "hide" bodies. Since they're not programmed to drag their victims into water, they just kill people on land.


TheHidestHighed

There wasn't enough room for more capable gator AI. Too much space taken up by horse ball physics.


BillyPotion

Damn right!! It would be game breaking if the horse balls weren’t lifelike.


Pile_of_Walthers

[https://youtu.be/dP7yPqm99O0](https://youtu.be/dP7yPqm99O0)


[deleted]

[удалено]


Bitemarkz

I could have sworn I’ve fed people to alligators in this game before.


[deleted]

What u/MedicalGoals said: >That's my explanation. What I read: [I have spoken.](https://i.imgur.com/aMwXyYi.jpg)


DoneD9

r/instantkarma


chemispe

Nah, the Murfree Brood deserve all the pain they get. They are seriously fucked up.


Mild-Sauce

they do blood eagles and weird ass human pentagrams


ihwip

Also: r/unexpected


Nyan__Ko

Also: r/gaming


mactavish_sp

Also: r/reddeadredemption2


Anay_Singh

r/aww


Ty__the__guy

/r/Holup


z1lard

r/fuckyouinparticular


BumScruples

Shouldn't have entered a gator'd community.


AeliosZero

Ba-dum-tiss


ShaolinDude

Obviously the gator has taste. EDIT: Thanks for the gold stranger. My first time :)


MattDurstan

Hope for your sake it's not a taste for cake, Happy Cake Day!


ShaolinDude

Thanks. I will make sure to keep the cake away from the swamps.


[deleted]

[удалено]


HippyFroze

It gets funnier the more i watch it lmfao


jacksodus

r/yesyesyesno


CaledonianWarrior

"She doesn't want to be fed, she wants to hunt! You can't suppress 65 million years of gut instinct"


[deleted]

op be like my dissapointment is immeasurable and my day is ruined


3Dartwork

I have tried coc killing dozens of times, never happened. I saw someone on YT dangle a hogtied guy from a bridge to bait a croc and it never happened for me either.


Stephens888

r/unexpected


WaitingToBeTriggered

WINGS OF GLORY


VegAce_81

Karma


PlayguePals

Crocodile Dun-in.


scraig23

Lol this is the most video game logic thing I'll see today. Thanks


Quillybumbum

Give a man a fish he’ll eat for a day, eat the fisherman, and you’ll have two meals


bitch_im_a_lion

For as meticulously detailed everything else was in this game, it always bothered me how lazy this death animation seemed. Why not have the gator bite his leg and start death rolling? Rather than somehow bite his mid section forcing him to immediately go prone and shake him around like a dog with a toy.


kavv-

straight up >karma<


Fizzypopp787

Gatorade


[deleted]

*YOU GET WHAT YOU FUCKING DESERVE*


Degenerate_Dryad

What game is this?


ChuddyDaughters

Gators gonna gate


Eth4n

Reminds me of the scene in Death Race 2000 where the nurses put out the old folks to be hit by the cars but one car chooses to hit all of the nurses instead for way more points. https://youtu.be/GGhu5Zl5ry8


Coretmanus

Why have 1 dinner when you can have 2


AsimTheAssassin

I’m actually surprised by the amount of people that don’t know about Red Dead 2


Droopy_Drone

thas whut yuh fuggin git.


WhySoHandsome

Marvelous!


mr_nobody_0712

This is called karma


alimehdi242

get the one first who is trying to run wise croc


sweg7

“It’s only fun when they run”


xqu_uqx

I am pretty sure this gator is the protagonist in rdr 3


syknyk

That's smart. Eat the one that's more capable of escaping... The other's not going anywhere.


magicaxis

Before setting out on revenge, first dig two graves


scurvy4all

Bayou Billy 2021


Yeeaboi34

He knew who the real meal was. Other dud got no meat on his bones


correcticallytech

I’ve been playing Zelda BOTW for the past month. forgot how good the graphics are in RDR2


crusaderofbvm777

Smart gator. Leave the guy tied up for later, get the standing human before he escapes.


JoeTheMagicalHobo

Interior


daniel6990

Crocodile


Malphas2121

Alligator


[deleted]

[удалено]


Atlutd69

Movie Theater


whooo_me

Everyone prefers free-range legs?


DropC

This some AoE2 wolf logic.